Named characters

Major entities (proper, common)

FAC

108 here/the office/The office/there/his office/my office/that area/Tristan ’s office/his place/park/my home/my apartment/Hayden ’s apartment/Emily ’s apartment/his apartment/the beautiful grounds/this place
86 home
47 the elevator/The elevator/the building/the office
47 the street/The street/the darkened street
35 the room/the hall/The room/his apartment/the lounge/a room/that room/the ballroom/my office
32 the building/the towering building above me/the huge office space/this building/his apartment/Emily ’s apartment building/her apartment
32 the bar/The bar/the club
28 the tent/The tent/a small tent/the outstretched tent/a tent
27 the bathroom/the bedroom/the apartment
25 the road/the highway/a dirt road/the main road/the track/the trail/this road/the rough road/The road

GPE

7 town
7 the city/the country/this city/This city/this place
7 the city/this city
3 the country
3 this place/This place
1 the same city
1 busy cities
1 cities
1 a city
1 the state

LOC

27 the world/The world
10 earth
6 the forest/the dark forest
5 the water/The water
3 the planet
2 a different world
2 the living area
2 this world
2 the outside world
2 the lake

PER

70 sir/This man/my man/This woman/an asshole/baby/my girlfriend/my beautiful man/the hero/the most attractive woman I ’ve seen in a long time/Good girl/darling/an American businessman/the eldest son of media mogul George Miles Jr. and the grandson of George Miles Sr/the grandson of George Miles Sr/the former executive chairman of Publishing and Consolidated Media Holdings , which predominantly owns media interests across a range of platforms/the first woman I have been with in a long time who had no idea who I was/a god/this guy/the CEO/a businessman — successful and handsome/this man/a self - absorbed player who sleeps with whoever he wants , whenever he wants/the king of Twatsville/The man/Oh man/my only man/sweetheart/the man/that snarky bitch/woman/my woman/The CEO/the most delicious man on the planet/my God/the control freak/princess/this woman/the beautiful woman in my kitchen/babe/my Emily/the paper man/the CEO of a company/you idiot/this asshole/Fucking asshole/the fucking asshole/my friend/The man that Emily/You idiot
48 sir/The man/the man/a young man/the ticket man/Oh man/that man/a man sitting next to the window/you poor homeless person/the layover guy who never asked for my number/the fucking CEO/this asshole/The man at the desk/a man/a terrible liar/the CEO/that Uber guy/gorgeous man/the ultimate male specimen/boss man/dad/an older woman who looks like she is scolding her husband/the man who is looking at his phone/your driver/boss
33 someone/the last person I want to hurt
30 this man/This man/a man who ’s so dominant and commanding/baby/The man/This guy/the guy/his brother/a gorgeous man/Thieving bastard/The last man/the same man who runs Miles Media/The man with me/an excellent breakfast chef
29 anyone/anyone I know
28 my girl/babe/sweetheart/this man/darling/dear/This guy/This man/all of this man/sir/Your princess/a pure sweetheart/the MC/boss/My girl/a bad liar/man/my beautiful girl
27 dear/babe/baby/this bartender/This guy/the fucking president/the man who did n’t even want my number the last time we slept together/the man/the bastard/My friend/the one who sits next to me/That fucking asshole/you crazy bastard/the blond god/The blonde/the brunette gushes/sweetheart/bitch/darling
25 The waiter/the waiter/the only person he ’s sleeping with
24 nobody/Nobody
19 people/People

ORG

3 the company
1 the biggest conglomerate media empire in the United States
1 the best companies in the United States
1 no other media company
1 Publishing and Consolidated Media Holdings , which predominantly owns media interests across a range of platforms
1 the police department
1 the Red Ribbon Killer
1 a corporate investigation firm
1 the debating team
1 the corporate investigation team

VEH

56 the car/The car/her car/my car/his parked car/the moving car/a car/an average car/a poser car/his car
20 the bus/The bus/a bus/that fucking bus
17 the limo/The limo
16 the plane/The plane
11 a car/car/this car/This car
7 the truck
6 a cab
4 the limousine/the limo
4 the cab/a cab/The cab
4 the pickup/the huge , beat - up light - blue truck

Text

Chapter 1 “ Can [you]_2281-you move ? ”_[2959-i] a voice behind [me]_2959-i growls . Startled , [I]_2959-i turn toward [the man behind [me]_2959-i]_{243-the man behind me} in the line . “ [I]_2959-i ’m sorry ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say in a fluster . “ Did [you]_2281-you want to get past ? ”_[2959-i] “ No . [I]_{243-the man behind me} want these fucking idiots at the desk to hurry up . [I]_{243-the man behind me} ’m going to miss [[my]_{243-the man behind me} damn plane]_{2282-my damn plane} . ”_{[243-the man behind me]} [He]_{243-the man behind me} sneers , and [I]_2959-i smell the alcohol wafting off [him]_{243-the man behind me} . “ [They]_244-they make [me]_{243-the man behind me} sick . ”_{[243-the man behind me]} [I]_2959-i turn back to the front . Great , a drunk in the check - in line . Just what [I]_2959-i need . [Heathrow Airport]_{1-heathrow airport} is bustling . Bad weather has delayed most of the flights , and to be honest , [I]_2959-i wish [they]_244-they would delay [mine]_2959-i . Then [I]_2959-i could turn around and go back to [the hotel]_{245-the hotel} and sleep for a week . [I]_2959-i am not in the mood for this shit . [I]_2959-i hear [the man]_246-alan turn and complain to [the people behind [him]_246-alan]_{247-the people behind him} , and [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes . Why are [people]_248-people so damn rude ? For another ten minutes , [I]_2959-i listen to [him]_246-alan bitch , sigh , and moan until [I]_2959-i can take it no longer . [I]_2959-i turn to [him]_246-alan . “ [They]_248-people are working as fast as [they]_248-people can . There ’s no need to be rude , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . “ What ? ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan yells as [he]_246-alan turns [his]_246-alan anger on [me]_2959-i . “ Manners are free , ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i mutter under [my]_2959-i breath . “ Manners are free ? ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan cries . “ What are [you]_246-alan , [a schoolteacher]_{2283-a schoolteacher} ? Or just [a raving bitch]_{2284-a raving bitch} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i glare at [him]_246-alan . Oh , [I]_2959-i dare all right . [I]_2959-i ’ve just spent the last forty - eight hours in hell . [I]_2959-i flew across [the world]_{249-the world} to go to a wedding , only to watch [[my]_2959-i ex - boyfriend]_{250-his new girlfriend} drape [himself]_246-alan over [[his]_246-alan new girlfriend]_{250-his new girlfriend} . [I]_2959-i ’m in the mood to cut [somebody]_251-somebody today . Do n’t mess with [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i turn back to the front as [my]_2959-i fury begins to boil . [He]_246-alan kicks [my]_2959-i suitcase at [my]_2959-i feet , and [I]_2959-i turn . “ Stop it , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . [He]_246-alan gets right up in [my]_2959-i face , and [I]_2959-i wince at the smell of [his]_246-alan breath . “ [I]_2959-i ’ll do whatever [I]_2959-i fucking like . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i see security come through [the lounge]_{252-the lounge} as [they]_{253-the staff} watch [him]_246-alan . [The staff]_{253-the staff} have seen what ’s going on here and called for backup . [I]_2959-i fake a smile . “ Please do n’t kick [my]_2959-i bag , [sir]_246-alan , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say sweetly . “ [I]_246-alan ’ll kick whatever [I]_246-alan fucking like . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan picks up [my]_2959-i suitcase and throws it across [the airport]_{254-the airport} . “ What the hell ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i screech . “ Hey , ”_[2959-i] [the man behind [us]_256-us]_{255-the man behind us} cries . “ Do n’t touch [her]_{255-the man behind us} stuff . Security ! ”_{[255-the man behind us]} [he]_{255-the man behind us} says . [Mr. Drunk]_{51-mr. drunk} and [Disorderly]_{52-disorderly} throws a punch at [[my]_2959-i savior]_{257-my savior} , and a scuffle breaks out . Security comes running in from everywhere , and [I]_2959-i am pushed back as [he]_{255-the man behind us} throws punches and screams obscenities . Oh hell , [I]_2959-i do not need this today . Eventually [they]_258-they get [him]_{255-the man behind us} under control , and [he]_{255-the man behind us} is taken away in handcuffs . [The kind security guard]_{259-the kind security guard} picks up [my]_2959-i bag . “ Sorry about that , ”_{[255-the man behind us]} [he]_{255-the man behind us} apologizes . “ Come with [me]_{255-the man behind us} , ”_{[255-the man behind us]} [he]_{255-the man behind us} says as [he]_{255-the man behind us} unhooks the rope on the line . “ Thank [you]_{255-the man behind us} . ”_{[255-the man behind us]} [I]_2959-i smile awkwardly at [everyone else in the line]_{260-everyone else in the line} . [I]_2959-i hate jumping [the queue]_{261-the queue} , but at this point , [I]_2959-i just do n’t care . “ Great . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sheepishly follow [him]_{255-the man behind us} , and [he]_{255-the man behind us} takes [me]_2959-i to [a young man]_246-alan ’s counter . [He]_{255-the man behind us} looks up and smiles broadly . “ Hello . ”_{[255-the man behind us]} “ Hi . ”_{[255-the man behind us]} “ Are [you]_{255-the man behind us} okay ? ”_{[255-the man behind us]} [he]_{255-the man behind us} asks . “ Yes , [I]_{255-the man behind us} ’m fine . Thank [you]_{255-the man behind us} for asking . ”_{[255-the man behind us]} “ Look after [her]_{255-the man behind us} , ”_{[263-the security guard]} [the security guard]_{263-the security guard} tells [the ticket man]_246-alan , and [he]_{255-the man behind us} gives [us]_264-us both a wink and disappears through [the crowd]_{265-the crowd} . “ Identification , please ? ”_[246-alan] [the man]_246-alan asks . [I]_2959-i scramble through [my]_2959-i purse and dig out [my]_2959-i passport and pass it over ; [he]_{255-the man behind us} smiles as [he]_{255-the man behind us} looks at the photo . [Oh man]_246-alan , that ’s the worst photo in all of history . “ Did [you]_246-alan see [me]_2959-i on Most Wanted ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ Possibly . That photo : Is it even [you]_246-alan ? ”_{[255-the man behind us]} [He]_{255-the man behind us} laughs . [I]_2959-i smile , embarrassed . “ [I]_{255-the man behind us} hope not . [I]_{255-the man behind us} ’m in trouble if it is . ”_{[255-the man behind us]} [He]_{255-the man behind us} types in [my]_2959-i details . “ Okay , so [we]_2285-we have [you]_246-alan flying to [New York]_{385-new york} today with a . . . ”_{[255-the man behind us]} [He]_{255-the man behind us} stops typing and reads . “ Uh - huh . Preferably not next to [that man]_246-alan . ”_{[255-the man behind us]} “ [He]_{255-the man behind us} wo n’t be going anywhere today , ”_{[255-the man behind us]} [he]_{255-the man behind us} replies as [he]_{255-the man behind us} continues to type at a ridiculous speed . “ Other than the lockup . ”_{[255-the man behind us]} “ Why would [you]_246-alan get drunk before coming to [the airport]_{254-the airport} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ [He]_{255-the man behind us} has n’t even been inside to [the airport bars]_{2287-the airport bars} yet . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_246-alan would be surprised by what goes on around here , ”_{[255-the man behind us]} [he]_{255-the man behind us} sighs . [I]_2959-i smile ; [this guy]_266-jim is nice . [He]_{255-the man behind us} prints off [my]_2959-i tickets . “ [I]_{255-the man behind us} ’ve upgraded [you]_{255-the man behind us} . ”_{[255-the man behind us]} “ What ? ”_{[255-the man behind us]} “ First class , as an apology for [him]_{255-the man behind us} mishandling [your]_{255-the man behind us} bag . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes widen . “ Oh , that ’s not necessary . . . really , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer . [He]_{255-the man behind us} hands the tickets over and smiles broadly . “ Enjoy [your]_{255-the man behind us} flight . ”_{[255-the man behind us]} “ Thank [you]_{255-the man behind us} so much , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i gush . [He]_{255-the man behind us} gives [me]_2959-i a wink , and [I]_2959-i could just reach over and hug [him]_{255-the man behind us} . But of course [I]_2959-i wo n’t . [I]_2959-i ’ll pretend that cool things like this happen to [me]_2959-i every day . “ Thanks again . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . “ [You]_{255-the man behind us} have access to [the VIP lounge]_{270-the house} , which is located on level one . Lunch and drinks are on [the house]_{270-the house} in there . Have a safe flight . ”_[2959-i] With one last smile , [he]_{255-the man behind us} looks back to the line . “ Next , please . ”_{[255-the man behind us]} [I]_2959-i walk through the baggage checks with a huge goofy grin on [my]_2959-i face . First class — just what [the doctor]_{267-the doctor} ordered . Three hours later , [I]_2959-i walk onto [the plane]_{268-the plane} like [a rock star]_{269-a rock star} . [I]_2959-i did n’t end up going into [the VIP lounge]_{270-the house} because , well . . . [I]_2959-i look like crap . [My]_2959-i long dark hair is up in a high ponytail , and [I]_2959-i ’m wearing black leggings , a baggy pink sweater , and tennis shoes , but [I]_2959-i did fix [my]_2959-i makeup a little , so that ’s something . If [I]_2959-i had known [I]_2959-i was going to be upgraded , [I]_2959-i would have at least tried to look the part and worn something swanky instead of looking like [a homeless person]_{271-a homeless person} . But anyway . . . who cares ? It ’s not like [I]_2959-i ’m going to see [[anyone]_272-anyone [I]_2959-i know]_272-anyone . [I]_2959-i hand [my]_2959-i ticket over to [the flight attendant]_{273-the flight attendant} . “ Just through [the left aisle]_{2288-the left aisle} and to the right . ”_[2959-i] “ Thanks . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i look at [my]_2959-i ticket and walk through [the plane]_{268-the plane} and see [my]_2959-i number . 1B. Damn it , [I]_2959-i do n’t have a window . [I]_2959-i get to [my]_2959-i seat , and [a man sitting next to the window]_246-alan turns to [me]_2959-i . Big blue eyes greet [me]_2959-i , and [he]_246-alan smiles . “ Hello . ”_[246-alan] “ Hi , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say . Oh no . . . [I]_2959-i ’m sitting next to [God]_0-aaron ’s gift to [women]_276-women . . . only [he]_246-alan ’s hotter . [I]_2959-i look like shit . Fuck it . [I]_2959-i open the overhead , and [he]_246-alan stands . “ Here , let [me]_246-alan . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan takes [my]_2959-i bag from [me]_2959-i and carefully places it up . [He]_246-alan ’s tall and built and wearing blue jeans and a white T - shirt ; [he]_246-alan smells like the best aftershave in history . “ Thanks , ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i murmur as [I]_2959-i pull [my]_2959-i hand through [my]_2959-i ponytail , trying to smooth out the knots . [I]_2959-i mentally kick [myself]_2959-i for not wearing something better . “ Do [you]_246-alan want the window seat ? ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan asks . [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_246-alan as [my]_2959-i brain misfires . [He]_246-alan gestures to the seat beside the window . “ [You]_246-alan do n’t mind ? ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i frown . “ Not at all . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan smiles . “ [I]_2959-i fly all the time . [You]_246-alan can have it . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i force a smile . “ Thanks . ”_[2959-i] That was code for “ [I]_2959-i know [you]_246-alan got upgraded , [[you]_246-alan poor homeless person]_246-alan , and [I]_2959-i feel sorry for [you]_246-alan . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sit down in [my]_2959-i seat and look nervously out the window , with [my]_2959-i hands clasped in front of [me]_2959-i on [my]_2959-i lap . “ Are [you]_246-alan going [home]_2289-home ? ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan asks . [I]_2959-i turn to [him]_246-alan . Oh , please do n’t talk to [me]_2959-i . [You]_277-i make [me]_2959-i nervous just sitting there . “ No , [I]_277-i ’ve been at a wedding , and [I]_277-i have a job interview in [New York]_{385-new york} on the way [home]_2289-home . [I]_277-i ’m only there for the day , and then [I]_277-i fly out again to [LA]_3-la . [I]_277-i live there . ”_[277-i] “ Ah . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan smiles . “ [I]_246-alan see . ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_246-alan for a moment ; [I]_2959-i should ask [him]_246-alan a question now . “ Are . . . [you]_279-you going [home]_2289-home ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say . “ Yes . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i nod , unsure what to say next , so [I]_2959-i choose the lame option and stare back out the window . [The attendant]_{273-the flight attendant} walks around with a bottle of champagne and glasses . Glasses . Since when do airlines give [you]_279-you a real glass ? Oh right , first class . [I]_2959-i knew that . “ Would [you]_279-you like some champagne to take off with , [sir]_246-alan ? ”_[246-alan] [the flight attendant]_{273-the flight attendant} asks [him]_246-alan . [I]_2959-i notice that [her]_{273-the flight attendant} name tag says [JESSICA]_54-jessica . “ That would be lovely . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan smiles and turns to [me]_2959-i . “ Make that two , please . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown as [she]_{273-the flight attendant} pours two glasses of champagne and passes one to [him]_246-alan and one to [me]_2959-i . “ Thank [you]_279-you . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . [I]_2959-i wait for [Jessica]_54-jessica to move out of earshot . “ Do [you]_279-you always order drinks for [other people]_{2290-other people} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . [He]_246-alan looks surprised by [my]_2959-i statement . “ Did it bother [you]_279-you ? ”_[246-alan] “ Not at all , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i huff . Damn this [Mr. Fancy Pants]_{55-mr. fancy pants} for thinking [he]_{55-mr. fancy pants} can order for [me]_2959-i . “ [I]_{55-mr. fancy pants} do like to order [my]_{55-mr. fancy pants} own drinks , though . ”_{[55-mr. fancy pants]} [He]_{55-mr. fancy pants} smiles . “ Well , [you]_279-you can order the next ones , then . ”_{[55-mr. fancy pants]} [He]_{55-mr. fancy pants} raises [his]_{55-mr. fancy pants} glass to [me]_2959-i and smirks ; then [he]_{55-mr. fancy pants} takes a sip . [He]_{55-mr. fancy pants} seems amused by [my]_2959-i annoyance . [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_{55-mr. fancy pants} deadpan . This could be victim number two of [my]_2959-i cutting today . [I]_2959-i am not in the mood for [some rich old bastard]_{280-some rich old bastard} to boss [me]_2959-i around . [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i champagne as [I]_2959-i look out the window . Well , [he]_{55-mr. fancy pants} ’s not really old . Maybe mid- to late thirties . [I]_2959-i mean , old compared to [me]_2959-i ; [I]_2959-i ’m twenty - five . But whatever . “ [I]_{55-mr. fancy pants} ’m [Jim]_266-jim , ”_{[55-mr. fancy pants]} [he]_{55-mr. fancy pants} says as [he]_{55-mr. fancy pants} holds [his]_{55-mr. fancy pants} hand out to shake [mine]_2959-i . Oh God , now [I]_2959-i have to be polite . [I]_2959-i shake [his]_{55-mr. fancy pants} hand . “ Hi , [Jim]_266-jim . [I]_{55-mr. fancy pants} ’m [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_{[55-mr. fancy pants]} [His]_{55-mr. fancy pants} eyes dance with mischief . “ Hello , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_{[55-mr. fancy pants]} [His]_{55-mr. fancy pants} eyes are big , bright blue , and dreamy , the kind [I]_2959-i could get lost in . But why is [he]_{55-mr. fancy pants} looking at [me]_2959-i like that ? [The plane]_{268-the plane} begins to travel slowly down [the runway]_{282-the runway} , and [I]_2959-i look between the earphones and armrest . Where do these plug in ? [They]_{283-the kind that overconfident youtubers} ’re high tech , [the kind that overconfident YouTubers]_{283-the kind that overconfident youtubers} use . [They]_{283-the kind that overconfident youtubers} do n’t even have a cord . [I]_2959-i look around . Well , this is stupid . How do [I]_2959-i plug them in ? “ [They]_{283-the kind that overconfident youtubers} ’re Bluetooth , ”_[266-jim] [Jim]_266-jim interrupts [me]_2959-i . “ Oh , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i mutter , feeling stupid . Of course [they]_{283-the kind that overconfident youtubers} are . “ Right . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_2291-you have n’t flown first class before ? ”_{[55-mr. fancy pants]} [he]_{55-mr. fancy pants} asks . “ No . [I]_2959-i got an upgrade . [Some weirdo]_{2292-some weirdo} threw [my]_2959-i bag across [the airport]_{254-the airport} when [he]_{55-mr. fancy pants} was drunk . [I]_2959-i think [the guy at the desk]_{55-mr. fancy pants} felt sorry for [me]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i give [him]_{55-mr. fancy pants} a lopsided smile . [He]_{55-mr. fancy pants} rolls [his]_{55-mr. fancy pants} lips as if amused and sips [his]_{55-mr. fancy pants} champagne ; [his]_{55-mr. fancy pants} eyes linger on [my]_2959-i face as if [he]_{55-mr. fancy pants} has something on [his]_{55-mr. fancy pants} mind . “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ Perhaps [the guy at the desk]_{55-mr. fancy pants} thought [you]_{55-mr. fancy pants} were gorgeous and upgraded [you]_{55-mr. fancy pants} to try to impress [you]_{55-mr. fancy pants} . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i had n’t thought of that . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i champagne as [I]_2959-i try to hide [my]_2959-i smile . That ’s an odd thing to say . “ Is that what [you]_{55-mr. fancy pants} would do ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ If [you]_{55-mr. fancy pants} were at the desk , would [you]_{55-mr. fancy pants} upgrade [women]_276-women to impress [them]_276-women ? ”_[2959-i] “ Absolutely . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smirk . “ Impressing [a woman [you]_{55-mr. fancy pants} ’re attracted to is crucial]_{2295-a woman you ’re attracted to is crucial} , ”_{[55-mr. fancy pants]} [he]_{55-mr. fancy pants} continues . [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_{55-mr. fancy pants} as [I]_2959-i try to get [my]_2959-i brain to keep up with the conversation . Why does that statement sound flirty ? “ And do tell . . . how would [you]_{55-mr. fancy pants} impress [a woman [you]_{55-mr. fancy pants} ’re attracted to]_{2295-a woman you ’re attracted to is crucial} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask , fascinated . [His]_{55-mr. fancy pants} eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ Offer [her]_{2295-a woman you ’re attracted to is crucial} a window seat . ”_{[55-mr. fancy pants]} The air crackles between [us]_284-us , and [I]_2959-i bite [my]_2959-i lip to hide [my]_2959-i goofy smile . “ [You]_{55-mr. fancy pants} ’re trying to impress [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . [He]_{55-mr. fancy pants} gives [me]_2959-i a slow , sexy smile . “ How am [I]_{55-mr. fancy pants} doing ? ”_{[55-mr. fancy pants]} [I]_2959-i smirk , unsure what to say . “ [I]_2959-i ’m simply saying that [you]_{55-mr. fancy pants} ’re attractive , nothing more and nothing less . Do n’t read into it . It was a statement , not a question . ”_[2959-i] “ Oh . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_{55-mr. fancy pants} , lost for words . What do [I]_2959-i even say to that ? Statement , not a question . . . huh ? Do n’t read into it . [This guy]_266-jim is weird . . . and utterly gorgeous . [The plane]_{268-the plane} begins to take off with speed , and [I]_2959-i hold on to [my]_2959-i armrests and scrunch [my]_2959-i eyes shut . “ [You]_{55-mr. fancy pants} do n’t like takeoffs ? ”_{[55-mr. fancy pants]} [he]_{55-mr. fancy pants} asks . “ Do [I]_2959-i look like [I]_2959-i like takeoffs ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i wince as [I]_2959-i hang on for dear life . “ [I]_{55-mr. fancy pants} love [them]_2296-them , ”_{[55-mr. fancy pants]} [he]_{55-mr. fancy pants} replies casually . “ [I]_{55-mr. fancy pants} love the feeling of power as it surges forward . That g - force throwback . ”_{[55-mr. fancy pants]} Okay . . . why is everything coming out of [his]_{55-mr. fancy pants} mouth sounding sexual ? [God]_0-aaron , [I]_2959-i need to get laid . . . stat . [I]_2959-i exhale and stare out the window as [we]_287-we go higher and higher . [I]_2959-i do n’t have the energy for [this guy]_266-jim to play cute today . [I]_2959-i ’m tired , [I]_2959-i ’m hungover , [I]_2959-i look crappy , and [[my]_2959-i ex]_{289-my ex} is a douche . [I]_2959-i want to go to sleep and wake up next year . [I]_2959-i decide [I]_2959-i ’ll watch a movie . [I]_2959-i begin to flick through the choices on the screen in front of [me]_2959-i . [He]_{55-mr. fancy pants} leans over and says , “ Great minds think alike . [I]_{55-mr. fancy pants} ’m watching a movie too . ”_{[55-mr. fancy pants]} [I]_2959-i fake a smile . Just stop being all hot and in [my]_2959-i space . [You]_290-you ’re probably married to [a vegan yoga nut who does meditation and shit]_{291-a vegan yoga nut who does meditation and shit} . “ Great , ”_[290-you] [I]_2959-i mutter deadpan . [I]_2959-i should have flown [coach]_292-coach ; at least [I]_2959-i would n’t have had to inhale the scent of [beautiful man]_{293-beautiful man} for eight long , sexless hours . [I]_2959-i scroll through [my]_2959-i screen and then narrow it down to [my]_2959-i choices . How to Lose [a Guy]_{294-a guy} in 10 Days . Pride and Prejudice . The Heat . [Jumanji]_58-jumanji . . . well , that has the Rock in it — it has to be good . Notting Hill . The Proposal . 50 First Dates . [Bridget Jones]_{59-bridget jones} ’s Diary . [Pretty Woman]_{295-pretty woman} . Sleepless in [Seattle]_4-seattle . [Magic Mike XXL]_60-michael . [I]_2959-i smile at the choices , all of [my]_2959-i favorites lined in a row ; this flight is going to be a dream . [I]_2959-i have n’t seen the sequel to [Magic Mike]_60-michael yet , so [I]_2959-i might start with that one . [I]_2959-i glance over to look at what [Jim]_266-jim has picked , and [I]_2959-i see the heading come up . Lincoln . Ugh . . . a political movie . Who watches that stuff for fun ? [I]_2959-i should have known [he]_266-jim ’d be boring . [He]_266-jim reaches up and taps the screen , and [I]_2959-i catch sight of [his]_266-jim watch . A chunky silver Rolex . [Ugh]_61-ugh , and [he]_266-jim has money too . Typical . “ What are [you]_296-you going to watch ? ”_[266-jim] [he]_266-jim asks . Oh no . . . [I]_2959-i do n’t want to appear ditzy . “ [I]_2959-i ’m not sure yet , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reply . Damn [you]_296-you . . . [I]_2959-i want to watch [men strip]_{297-men strip} . “ What are [you]_296-you watching ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ [Lincoln]_62-lincoln . [I]_2959-i ’ve been meaning to see it for a long time . ”_[2959-i] “ Sounds boring , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say . [He]_266-jim smiles at [my]_2959-i answer . “ [I]_266-jim ’ll let [you]_296-you know . ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim puts [his]_266-jim earphones on and begins to watch [his]_266-jim movie , and [I]_2959-i scroll through [my]_2959-i choices again . [I]_2959-i really want to watch [Magic Mike XXL]_60-michael . Does it matter if [he]_266-jim sees ? No . . . that ’s just embarrassing . It makes [me]_2959-i look desperate . Who am [I]_2959-i kidding ? [I]_2959-i am desperate . [I]_2959-i have n’t seen a dick in over a year . [I]_2959-i tap on The Proposal . [I]_2959-i ’ll swap one fantasy for another . [I]_2959-i ’ve always dreamed of having [Ryan Reynolds]_{63-ryan reynolds} as [[my]_2959-i personal assistant]_{63-ryan reynolds} . The movie begins , and [I]_2959-i smile at the screen . [I]_2959-i love this movie . No matter how many times [I]_2959-i watch it , [I]_2959-i always laugh . [Gammy]_64-gammy is [my]_2959-i favorite . “ [You]_2959-i ’re watching a romance ? ”_[266-jim] [he]_266-jim asks . “ A rom - com , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reply . For [God]_0-aaron ’s sake , [this guy]_266-jim is nosy . [He]_266-jim smirks as if [he]_266-jim ’s better than [me]_2959-i . “ More champagne ? ”_{[273-the flight attendant]} [the flight attendant]_{273-the flight attendant} asks . Blue Eyes looks over at [me]_2959-i . “ Here ’s [your]_2959-i chance to order for [us]_2297-us . ”_[266-jim] [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_266-jim flatly ; all right , [he]_266-jim ’s beginning to piss [me]_2959-i off now . “ [We]_2297-us ’ll have two , please . ”_[266-jim] “ What do [you]_2959-i like about rom - coms ? ”_[266-jim] [he]_266-jim asks as [he]_266-jim keeps [his]_266-jim eyes on the screen in front of [him]_266-jim . “ Men who do n’t talk during movies , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper into [my]_2959-i champagne glass . [He]_266-jim smiles broadly to [himself]_266-jim . “ What do [you]_2959-i like about . . . ”_[266-jim] [I]_2959-i pause because [I]_2959-i do n’t even know what [Lincoln]_62-lincoln is about . “ Political films ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ The fact that [they]_2298-they ’re boring as all hell ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i just like true stories , regardless of what [they]_2298-they are . ”_[2959-i] “ So do [I]_2959-i , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reply . “ That ’s why [I]_266-jim like romance . Love is true . ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim chuckles into [his]_266-jim glass as if amused . [I]_2959-i glance over at [him]_266-jim . “ What does that mean ? ”_[2959-i] “ Rom - coms are as far from reality as [you]_2959-i can get . [I]_2959-i bet [you]_2959-i ’re [the type who reads trashy romance novels too]_266-jim . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_266-jim flatly . [I]_2959-i think [I]_2959-i hate [this man]_266-jim . “ [I]_2959-i am , actually . . . and if [you]_2959-i must know , [I]_2959-i ’m watching [Magic Mike XXL]_60-michael after this so [I]_2959-i can watch [gorgeous men]_{2299-gorgeous men} take [their]_{2299-gorgeous men} clothes off . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i champagne in annoyance . “ And [I]_266-jim ’ll smile through the whole damn thing , regardless of [your]_266-jim snooty judgment . ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim laughs out loud , and it ’s deep and strong and does things to [my]_2959-i stomach . [I]_2959-i put [my]_2959-i headphones back on and pretend to focus on [my]_2959-i screen . [I]_2959-i ca n’t , though , because [I]_2959-i just totally embarrassed [myself]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i can feel [myself]_2959-i blushing . Stop talking . Two hours later , [I]_2959-i sit and stare out the window . [My]_2959-i movie is over , but [his]_266-jim scent is not . It ’s surrounding [me]_2959-i , taunting [me]_2959-i with things that [I]_2959-i should n’t be thinking about . How does [he]_266-jim smell so good ? Unsure what to do without seeming awkward , [I]_2959-i decide [I]_2959-i ’ll take a nap , try to sleep through the next few hours , but first [I]_2959-i need to go to [the bathroom]_{300-the bathroom} . [I]_2959-i stand . “ Excuse [me]_266-jim . ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim moves [his]_266-jim legs a little but not enough for [me]_2959-i to fit through , and [I]_2959-i have to lean over [him]_266-jim to get past . [I]_2959-i stumble and fall and put [my]_2959-i hand on [his]_266-jim thigh ; it ’s large and hard to [my]_2959-i touch . “ [I]_2959-i ’m so sorry , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer , embarrassed . “ That ’s fine . ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim smirks up at [me]_2959-i . “ More than fine . ”_[266-jim] [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_266-jim for a moment . Huh ? “ There ’s a method to [my]_2959-i madness . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . What does that mean ? [I]_2959-i make [my]_2959-i way past [him]_266-jim and go to [the bathroom]_{300-the bathroom} , and then [I]_2959-i walk around and stretch [my]_2959-i legs a little as [I]_2959-i ponder that statement . [I]_2959-i ’m stumped — [I’ve]_65-i’ve got nothing . “ What did [you]_2959-i mean by that ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask as [I]_2959-i fall back into [my]_2959-i seat . “ Nothing . ”_[2959-i] “ Did [you]_2959-i give [me]_266-jim the window seat so [I]_266-jim would have to climb over [you]_2959-i ? ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim tilts [his]_266-jim head to the side . “ No , [I]_266-jim gave [you]_2959-i the window seat because [you]_2959-i wanted it . Climbing over [me]_266-jim was just an added bonus . ”_[266-jim] [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_266-jim as [I]_2959-i struggle to respond . Am [I]_2959-i imagining this ? [Older rich guys]_{302-older rich guys} do n’t usually speak to [me]_2959-i like this . . . at all . “ Are [you]_2959-i flirting with [me]_2959-i , [Jim]_266-jim ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . [He]_266-jim gives [me]_2959-i a slow , sexy smile . “ [I]_266-jim do n’t know . Am [I]_266-jim ? ”_[266-jim] “ [I]_266-jim asked [you]_2959-i first , and do n’t answer [my]_266-jim question with a question . ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim smirks as [he]_266-jim turns [his]_266-jim attention back to the television screen . “ This is probably where [you]_2959-i should start flirting back . . . [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_[266-jim] [I]_2959-i feel [my]_2959-i cheeks flush with embarrassment as [I]_2959-i try to hide [my]_2959-i stupid smile . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t flirt . [I]_2959-i either want [a man]_{2300-a man} or [I]_2959-i do n’t , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i announce . “ Is that so ? ”_[266-jim] [he]_266-jim says as if fascinated . “ And how long after [you]_2959-i meet [a man]_{2300-a man} do [you]_2959-i make that decision ? ”_[266-jim] “ Instantaneously , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i lie . That ’s not true , but [I]_2959-i ’ll pretend . Faking confidence is [my]_2959-i superpower . “ Really ? ”_[266-jim] [he]_266-jim whispers as [the flight attendant]_{273-the flight attendant} walks past [us]_304-us . “ Excuse [me]_266-jim , can [we]_304-us have two more champagnes , please ? ”_[266-jim] [he]_266-jim asks [her]_{273-the flight attendant} . “ Of course , [sir]_266-jim . ”_[266-jim] [His]_266-jim eyes come back to meet [mine]_266-jim . “ Well , do tell . What was [your]_266-jim first impression of [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pretend to look around for [Jessica]_54-jessica [the flight attendant]_{273-the flight attendant} . “ [You]_266-jim may need something stronger to drink to hear this , [Jim]_266-jim . [You]_266-jim ’re not going to like it . ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim laughs out loud , and [I]_2959-i find [myself]_2959-i smiling broadly as [I]_2959-i watch [him]_266-jim . “ What ’s funny ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ [You]_266-jim are . ”_[2959-i] “ Why am [I]_2959-i funny ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ This sense of righteousness that [you]_266-jim have . ”_[2959-i] “ Oh , like [you]_266-jim do n’t have that too . . . Mr. [I]_305-i ’ll Have Two Champagnes . ”_[305-i] [Our]_305-i drinks arrive , and [he]_266-jim smiles as [he]_266-jim passes [mine]_2959-i to [me]_2959-i . [His]_266-jim eyes linger on [my]_2959-i face as [he]_266-jim takes a sip . “ What were [you]_266-jim doing in [London]_6-london ? ”_[266-jim] “ Ugh . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes . “ [I]_2959-i flew over for [a friend]_{2302-a friend} ’s wedding , and to be honest , [I]_2959-i wish [I]_2959-i had n’t gone . ”_[2959-i] “ Why not ? ”_[266-jim] “ [[My]_266-jim ex]_{289-my ex} was there with [his]_{289-my ex} new squeeze , and [he]_{289-my ex} was being over - the - top affectionate with [her]_{2302-a friend} to piss [me]_266-jim off . ”_[266-jim] “ Which worked , obviously , ”_[266-jim] [he]_266-jim adds as [he]_266-jim tilts [his]_266-jim glass toward [me]_2959-i . “ Hmm . ”_[266-jim] [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i drink in disgust . “ Just a little . ”_[266-jim] “ What did [she]_{2302-a friend} look like ? ”_[266-jim] “ Long bleached - blonde hair and huge silicone lips and boobs and eyelashes and fake tan and everything [I]_266-jim ’m not . ”_[266-jim] “ Hmm . ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim listens intently . “ Like [Backseat Barbie]_{66-backseat barbie} on crack . ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim chuckles . “ [Everyone]_{2304-everyone} loves [a Backseat Barbie]_{66-backseat barbie} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i look over at [him]_266-jim in disgust . “ This is probably where [you]_2305-you should tell [me]_2959-i that [all men]_{2306-all men} hate [Backseat Barbies]_{67-backseat barbies} , [Jim]_266-jim . Do n’t [you]_2305-you know anything about polite plane - conversation etiquette ? ”_[2959-i] “ Obviously not . ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim frowns as [he]_266-jim considers [my]_2959-i statement . “ Why would [I]_266-jim do that ? ”_[266-jim] [I]_2959-i widen [my]_2959-i eyes to accentuate [my]_2959-i point . “ To be nice . ”_[2959-i] “ Oh , right . ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim frowns as if bracing [himself]_266-jim to lie . “ [Emily]_186-jameson . . . [all men]_{2306-all men} are repulsed by [Backseat Barbies]_{67-backseat barbies} . ”_[266-jim] [I]_2959-i smile as [I]_2959-i tip [my]_2959-i glass to [him]_266-jim . “ Thank [you]_266-jim , [Jim]_266-jim . ”_[2959-i] “ Although . . . ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim pauses for a moment . “ If [they]_{2306-all men} give good head . . . ”_[266-jim] What the hell ? [I]_2959-i snort [my]_2959-i champagne up [my]_2959-i nose and choke . That ’s the last thing [I]_2959-i ever expected to hear come out of [his]_266-jim mouth . “ [Jim]_266-jim , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i splutter as it sprays everywhere . [He]_266-jim laughs as [he]_266-jim grabs [his]_266-jim napkins and hands them over , and [I]_2959-i wipe the drink dribbling from [my]_2959-i chin . “ [Men who look like [you]_2308-you are not supposed to talk about head]_{2307-men who look like you are not supposed to talk about head} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i cough . “ Why not ? ”_[266-jim] [he]_266-jim asks incredulously . “ And what do [you]_2308-you mean , [men who look like [me]_266-jim]_{2307-men who look like you are not supposed to talk about head} ? ”_[266-jim] “ All serious and stuff . ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim looks at [me]_2959-i deadpan . “ Define stuff . ”_[266-jim] “ [You]_2308-you know , older , rich , and bossy . ”_[266-jim] [His]_266-jim eyes dance with delight . “ And what gives [you]_2308-you the impression that [I]_2959-i ’m rich and bossy ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i exhale in an overexaggerated way . “ [You]_2308-you look rich . ”_[2959-i] “ How do [I]_266-jim ? ”_[266-jim] “ [Your]_2308-you fancy watch . The cut of [your]_2308-you shirt . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i glance down at [his]_266-jim shoes . “ [I]_2959-i ’ve never seen shoes like that before . Where did [you]_2308-you even get those ? ”_[2959-i] “ In [a shop]_{2309-a shop} , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim looks at [his]_266-jim watch . “ And [I]_2959-i ’ll have [you]_186-jameson know that this watch was a gift from [a girlfriend]_{2310-a girlfriend} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes . “ [I]_266-jim bet [she]_{2310-a girlfriend} ’s a vegan yoga nut . ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim smirks . “ [I]_266-jim know [[your]_266-jim type of woman]_{2311-your type of woman} . ”_[266-jim] “ Really . ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim leans closer . “ Please go on — this character analysis is fascinating . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile as a little voice from [my]_2959-i subconscious screams , Stop drinking , [fool]_306-fool ! “ [I]_306-fool ’m assuming [you]_186-jameson live in [New York]_{385-new york} . ”_[306-fool] “ Correct . ”_[306-fool] “ In [an apartment]_{2312-an apartment} . ”_[306-fool] “ Affirmative . ”_[306-fool] “ [You]_186-jameson probably work at some ritzy company . ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim smiles ; [he]_266-jim likes this game . “ Perhaps . ”_[266-jim] “ [You]_186-jameson would have [a girlfriend]_{2310-a girlfriend} or . . . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i glance down . “ [You]_186-jameson do n’t wear a wedding ring . . . so perhaps [you]_186-jameson cheat on [[your]_186-jameson wife]_{2314-your wife} when [you]_186-jameson travel for work ? ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim chuckles . “ [You]_186-jameson really should make a profession out of this . [I]_2959-i ’m amazed at the accuracy . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i like this game too ; [I]_2959-i smile broadly . “ What do [you]_186-jameson think about [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ What was [your]_186-jameson first impression when [I]_2959-i walked onto [the plane]_{268-the plane} ? ”_[2959-i] “ Well . ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim frowns as [he]_266-jim considers the question . “ Do [you]_186-jameson want the politically correct version ? ”_[266-jim] “ No . [I]_2959-i want the truth . ”_[2959-i] “ Right . . . well , in that case , [I]_2959-i noticed [your]_186-jameson long legs and the curve of [your]_186-jameson neck . The dimple in [your]_186-jameson chin . [You]_186-jameson are [the most attractive woman [I]_2959-i ’ve seen in a long time]_186-jameson , and when [you]_186-jameson smiled , it brought [me]_2959-i to [my]_2959-i feet . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile softly as the air swirls between [us]_307-us . “ And then [you]_186-jameson spoke . . . and ruined everything . ”_[2959-i] What ? [I]_2959-i burst out laughing . “ [I]_2959-i ruined everything ? How did [I]_2959-i ruin everything ? ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_186-jameson ’re bossy , with a sarcastic snark . ”_[2959-i] “ What ’s the problem with that ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer in outrage . “ Well , [I]_2959-i ’m bossy and sarcastic . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i shrugs . “ And ? ”_[2959-i] “ And [I]_2959-i do n’t want to date [myself]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i like [sweet , demure girls]_{2316-sweet , demure girls} , [the ones who do what [I]_2959-i say]_{2317-the ones who do what i say} . ”_[2959-i] “ [Ugh]_61-ugh . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes . “ [The ones who clean [the house]_{270-the house} and have sex on Saturdays]_{2317-the ones who do what i say} . ”_[2959-i] “ Precisely . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i laugh and hold [my]_2959-i glass up to clink with [his]_2959-i . “ [You]_186-jameson ’re not bad for [a boring old guy with weird shoes]_{2319-a boring old guy with weird shoes} . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i laughs . “ And [you]_186-jameson ’re not bad for [a young , hot smart - ass]_{2319-a boring old guy with weird shoes} . ”_[2959-i] “ Do [you]_186-jameson want to watch Magic Mike XXL with [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ [I]_2959-i suppose , although [I]_2959-i should let [you]_186-jameson know . . . [I]_2959-i am an ex - stripper [myself]_2959-i , so this is nothing new for [me]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] “ Really ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i try to hide [my]_2959-i smile . “ [You]_186-jameson ’re good on a pole ? ”_[2959-i] [His]_2959-i eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ [My]_2959-i pole work is the best in [the country]_{2320-the country} . ”_[2959-i] The air crackles between [us]_308-us , and [I]_2959-i have to concentrate on stopping [my]_2959-i inebriated mouth from saying something slutty . [He]_2959-i pushes the screen and taps through to [Magic Mike XXL]_60-michael . . . and [I]_2959-i smile broadly . [This man]_56-robbie is so unexpected . [First class]_{310-first class} is definitely the way to fly . Six hours later “ Okay , next question . The weirdest place [you]_186-jameson ’ve ever had sex ? ”_[2959-i] [he]_2959-i whispers . [I]_2959-i smirk . “ [You]_186-jameson ca n’t ask [me]_2959-i that . ”_[2959-i] “ Yes , [I]_56-robbie can . [I]_56-robbie just did . ”_[56-robbie] “ It ’s rude . ”_[2959-i] “ Says who ? ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i looks around . “ It ’s just a question , and [nobody]_2321-nobody is listening . ”_[266-jim] [Jim]_266-jim and [I]_2959-i have talked and whispered and laughed [our]_308-us way through the entire flight . “ Hmm . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i think out loud . “ That ’s [a tough one]_{2322-a tough one} . ”_[2959-i] “ Why ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i ’m on a bit of a drought at the moment . [I]_2959-i can hardly remember any sex . ”_[2959-i] “ How long ? ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i frowns . “ Oh . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i look to the ceiling as [I]_2959-i think . “ [I]_2959-i have n’t had sex in like . . . eighteen months . ”_[2959-i] [His]_2959-i face falls in horror . “ What ? ”_[2959-i] “ It ’s lame , is n’t it ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i wince . “ Very . [You]_311-boy need to up [your]_311-boy game . [They]_2323-they ’re very bad statistics , indeed . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i know . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i giggle . [Boy]_311-boy . . . [we]_308-us ’re so tipsy . “ Why am [I]_2959-i telling [you]_311-boy all this stuff ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ [You]_311-boy ’re just [some random guy [I]_2959-i met on [a plane]_{2325-a plane}]_{2324-some random guy i met on a plane} . ”_[2959-i] “ Who happens to be very interested in the subject . ”_[2959-i] “ Why is that ? ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i leans in and whispers to [me]_2959-i so that the flight attendants ca n’t hear [us]_308-us . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t understand how [someone]_2326-someone as hot as [you]_311-boy does n’t get fucked three times a day . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_2959-i as [I]_2959-i feel a tingle all the way to [my]_2959-i toes . Stop it . [This guy]_2959-i is too old for [me]_2959-i and so not [my]_2959-i type . [His]_2959-i eyes drop to [my]_2959-i lips , and the air between [us]_308-us zaps with electricity . “ How long are [you]_2327-you in [New York]_{385-new york} ? ”_[2959-i] [he]_2959-i asks . [I]_2959-i watch [his]_2959-i tongue dart out and lick [his]_2959-i bottom lip in slow motion . [I]_2959-i can almost feel it between [my]_2959-i . . . “ Just the afternoon . [I]_2959-i have [my]_2959-i interview at six tonight , and then [I]_2959-i catch the last flight out , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ Can [you]_2327-you change [your]_2327-you flight ? ”_[2959-i] Why ? “ No . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i smirks as [he]_2959-i watches [me]_2959-i , and it ’s obvious [he]_2959-i ’s imagining something . “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . “ [I]_2959-i wish [we]_2328-we were on a private jet . ”_[2959-i] “ Why is that ? ”_[2959-i] [His]_2959-i eyes drop to [my]_2959-i lips once more . “ Because [I]_2959-i ’d break that drought of [yours]_2329-yours and initiate [you]_2329-yours into [the Miles - High Club]_{7-the miles - high club} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i get a visual of climbing on top of [him]_2959-i , right here , right now . “ It ’s [Mile - High Club]_{8-mile - high club} . . . not [Miles]_{68-miles media} , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ No . . . it ’s [Miles]_{68-miles media} . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i smirks as [his]_2959-i eyes darken . “ Trust [me]_2959-i — it ’s [Miles]_{68-miles media} . ”_[2959-i] Something inside [me]_2959-i snaps , and suddenly [I]_2959-i want to say something crazy and out of the ordinary . [I]_2959-i lean forward and whisper in [his]_2959-i ear , “ [You]_2959-i know , [I]_2959-i ’ve never fucked [a stranger]_{2330-a stranger} before . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i inhales sharply as [his]_2959-i eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ Do [you]_2959-i want to fuck [a stranger]_{2330-a stranger} ? ”_[2959-i] [he]_2959-i murmurs as arousal thrums between [us]_312-us . [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_2959-i . This is so out of character for [me]_2959-i . [This man]_2959-i makes [me]_2959-i . . . “ Do n’t be shy , ”_[2959-i] [he]_2959-i whispers . “ Tell [me]_2959-i , if [we]_312-us were alone right now . . . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i pauses as [he]_2959-i chooses [his]_2959-i words . “ What would [you]_2959-i give [me]_2959-i , [Emily]_186-jameson ? ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes search [his]_2959-i , and maybe it ’s the alcohol or the lack of sex or the fact that [I]_2959-i know [I]_2959-i ’ll never see [him]_2959-i again . . . or perhaps [I]_2959-i ’m just a total ho . “ [Me]_2959-i , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i breathe . “ [I]_2959-i would give [you]_2959-i [me]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] [Our]_313-we eyes lock , and as if forgetting where [we]_313-we are , [he]_2959-i leans forward and cups [my]_2959-i face in [his]_2959-i hand . [His]_2959-i eyes are so blue , and a wave of arousal sweeps through [me]_2959-i at [his]_2959-i touch . [I]_2959-i want [this man]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i want [all of [this man]_2959-i]_2959-i . . . every last drop . “ Hot towel ? ”_[54-jessica] [Jessica]_54-jessica [the flight attendant]_{273-the flight attendant} asks . [We]_313-we jump back from each other , embarrassed . What must [they]_313-we think of [us]_313-we ? [They]_313-we ’ve been watching [us]_313-we flirt shamelessly for the entire trip . “ Thank [you]_54-jessica , ”_[313-we] [I]_2959-i stammer as [I]_2959-i take the towel from [her]_54-jessica . “ There ’s a snowstorm in [New York]_{385-new york} , and [we]_313-we ’re going to circle for a while to see if [we]_313-we can land , ”_[54-jessica] [she]_54-jessica says . “ What happens if [we]_313-we ca n’t ? ”_[266-jim] [Jim]_266-jim asks . “ [We]_313-we will fly on to [Boston]_{385-new york} and have an emergency layover for the night . [You]_2331-you will be accommodated in [a hotel]_{2332-a hotel} , of course . [We]_313-we ’ll know in the next ten minutes . [I]_266-jim ’ll keep [you]_2331-you updated . ”_[266-jim] “ Thank [you]_2331-you . ”_[54-jessica] [She]_54-jessica walks off to the other side of [the plane]_{268-the plane} and out of earshot , and [Jim]_266-jim leans over and whispers , “ [I]_266-jim hope [New York]_{385-new york} freezes the fuck over . ”_[266-jim] Nerves dance in [my]_2959-i stomach . “ Why is that ? ”_[266-jim] “ [I]_266-jim have plans for [us]_2333-us , ”_[266-jim] [he]_266-jim whispers darkly . [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_266-jim as [my]_2959-i brain misfires . [I]_2959-i ’ve been prick teasing like a pro , but [I]_2959-i ’m really [not that kind of girl]_{316-not that kind of girl} . It ’s easy to be brave and slutty when there ’s no chance of anything happening . [I]_2959-i begin to perspire . Why did [I]_2959-i get so damn tipsy ? Why did [I]_2959-i tell [him]_266-jim about [my]_2959-i drought ? That ’s supposed to be kept private , [fool]_306-fool . “ Another drink ? ”_[266-jim] [Jim]_266-jim whispers . “ [I]_266-jim can’t — [I]_266-jim have a job interview this afternoon . ”_[266-jim] “ That wo n’t be happening . ”_[266-jim] “ Do n’t say that , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer . “ [I]_2959-i want this job . ”_[2959-i] “ Good evening , [passengers]_{2334-passengers} ; this is [the captain]_{2335-the captain} speaking . ”_[266-jim] A voice comes over the loudspeaker , and [I]_2959-i close [my]_2959-i eyes . Shit . “ Due to a snowstorm in [New York]_{385-new york} , [we]_2336-we will be flying on to [Boston]_{385-new york} tonight and staying there . [We]_2336-we will return to [New York]_{385-new york} early in the morning . Sorry for any inconvenience this has caused , but safety is [our]_2336-we priority . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes meet [Jim]_266-jim ’s , and [he]_266-jim gives [me]_2959-i a slow and sexy smile and raises [his]_266-jim eyebrow . Oh no . Chapter 2 “ Do n’t look so excited . ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim smirks . “ [Jim]_266-jim . . . , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer . Oh hell , how do [I]_2959-i say this ? “ [I]_2959-i ’m not really the kind of girl who . . . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i voice trails off . “ Who fucks on first dates ? ”_[266-jim] [he]_266-jim says , finishing [my]_2959-i sentence . “ Yes . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i wince at the crudeness of that statement . “ [I]_2959-i just do n’t want [you]_2337-you to think . . . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_266-jim know . [I]_266-jim would n’t , ”_[266-jim] [he]_266-jim replies curtly . “ [I]_266-jim do n’t . ”_[266-jim] “ Good . ”_[2959-i] Relief fills [me]_2959-i . “ [I]_266-jim was being flirty when [I]_266-jim thought [we]_2338-we were getting off and never seeing [each other]_{2339-each other} again . ”_[266-jim] “ Right . ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim smirks in amusement . “ Not that [I]_2959-i do n’t think [you]_2337-you ’re great , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i add . “ Because if [I]_2959-i were [that kind of girl]_{2340-that kind of girl} , [I]_2959-i would totally be into [you]_2337-you . [We]_2338-we would be fucking like . . . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pause as [I]_2959-i try to think of an analogy . “ Rabbits ? ”_[266-jim] [he]_266-jim offers . “ Yes . ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim holds both hands in the air . “ [I]_266-jim understand ; [platonic humans]_{2341-platonic humans} only . ”_[266-jim] [I]_2959-i smile broadly . “ [I]_2959-i ’m so glad [you]_2959-i understand . ”_[2959-i] Seven hours later [He]_266-jim slams [me]_2959-i up against the wall as [he]_266-jim struggles to pull [my]_2959-i skirt up over [my]_2959-i hips , and [his]_266-jim open mouth ravages [my]_2959-i neck . “ Door , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pant . “ Open the damn door . ”_[2959-i] Oh God . . . [I]_2959-i ’ve never felt this chemistry with [anyone]_272-anyone before . [We]_319-we ’ve laughed and danced and kissed [our]_319-we way around [Boston]_{385-new york} , and somehow [he]_266-jim makes [me]_2959-i feel at ease . It ’s as if [I]_2959-i do this type of thing every day , and it ’s completely natural . The weird thing is , it feels right . The spontaneity of the situation [I]_2959-i find [myself]_2959-i in has [me]_2959-i feeling all brave . [This man]_266-jim is witty and funny and dirty as all hell , and in [my]_2959-i opinion — which , in truth , could be totally screwed over with alcohol consumption at the moment — [he]_266-jim ’s worth the risk . . . because [I]_2959-i know [I]_2959-i will never get the opportunity to be with [a man like [him]_266-jim]_{320-a man like him} again . [I]_2959-i ’ve died and gone to [layover bad - girl heaven]_{321-layover bad - girl heaven} . [Jim]_266-jim fumbles with the key , and [we]_319-we stumble into [[my]_2959-i room]_{322-my room} . Then [he]_266-jim throws [me]_2959-i onto the bed . [My]_2959-i chest rises and falls as [we]_319-we stare at each other , and the air between crackles with electricity . “ [I]_2959-i ’m not [this kind of girl]_{2342-this kind of girl} , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i remind [him]_266-jim . “ [I]_266-jim know , ”_[266-jim] [he]_266-jim breathes . “ [I]_266-jim would n’t want to corrupt [you]_266-jim . ”_[266-jim] “ But there is a drought , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ So . . . so dry . ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim raises [his]_266-jim eyebrows as [he]_266-jim pants along with [me]_2959-i . “ This is true . ”_[266-jim] [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_266-jim for a moment as [I]_2959-i try to clear [my]_2959-i arousal fog . [My]_2959-i sex is throbbing and pleading for [his]_266-jim body . “ It would be a shame to . . . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i voice trails off . “ [I]_266-jim know . ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim licks [his]_266-jim lips in appreciation as [his]_266-jim eyes roam over [my]_2959-i body . “ Such a fucking shame . ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim takes [his]_266-jim shirt off over [his]_266-jim shoulders , and [my]_2959-i breath catches . [He]_266-jim has a broad , muscular chest with olive skin and a scattering of hair that runs from [his]_266-jim navel and disappears down into [his]_266-jim pants . [His]_266-jim hair is dark , and [his]_266-jim eyes are a brilliant blue — but it ’s the power behind [them]_323-them that has [me]_2959-i aching for [him]_266-jim to take [me]_2959-i . There ’s an edge to [his]_266-jim touch that [I]_2959-i ’ve never felt before . [He]_266-jim ’s all male and pure domination . There ’s no mistaking who ’s in charge here . Something about [this man]_266-jim has opened up another side of [me]_2959-i that [I]_2959-i did n’t know existed . [I]_2959-i know [he]_266-jim could have [any woman in [the world]_{249-the world} [he]_266-jim wants]_{324-any woman in the world he wants} . And at this moment , [he]_266-jim wants [me]_2959-i . There ’s no denying the chemistry between [us]_326-us ; it ’s raw , honest , and all - consuming . [He]_266-jim ’s hardly touched [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i already know that this night is special . Maybe fate has dealt [me]_2959-i an ace for a change . With [his]_266-jim eyes locked on [mine]_2959-i and in slow motion , [he]_266-jim unzips [his]_266-jim pants and pulls [his]_266-jim dick out . It ’s big and hard , and [my]_2959-i chest rises and falls as [I]_2959-i watch [him]_266-jim . [My]_2959-i heart is in overdrive . Is this really happening ? Oh . [My]_2959-i . God . [He]_266-jim begins to slowly stroke [himself]_266-jim , and [my]_2959-i mouth falls open as [I]_2959-i stare , transfixed . [I]_2959-i ’ve never had [a man]_{2300-a man} touch [himself]_{2300-a man} in front of [me]_2959-i before . [Holy fucking shit]_{69-holy fucking shit} . This is off the hook . [He]_266-jim lifts one of [his]_266-jim feet to the bed and really begins to let [himself]_266-jim have it . The muscles in [his]_266-jim shoulders and arms flex as [he]_266-jim jerks [himself]_266-jim hard , and [my]_2959-i insides ripple in pleasure as [I]_2959-i imagine it ’s [me]_2959-i doing it for [him]_266-jim . This is like reality porn . . . only ten times better . What the hell am [I]_2959-i doing here ? [I]_2959-i ’m [a good girl]_{328-a good girl} , and [good girls]_{329-good girls} do n’t do bad things with [men]_330-men like this . [We]_331-we do n’t know [the same people]_{332-the same people} , [we]_331-we do n’t live in [the same city]_{333-the same city} , and [I]_2959-i may never see [him]_266-jim again , and there ’s an unexpected freedom in that . [I]_2959-i can be different . Whoever [he]_266-jim wants [me]_2959-i to be . [His]_266-jim eyes are locked on [mine]_2959-i , and [his]_266-jim jaw clenches . “ Get over here and suck [my]_266-jim cock , [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_[266-jim] [he]_266-jim murmurs darkly . [God]_0-aaron , yes . [I]_2959-i thought [he]_266-jim ’d never ask . [I]_2959-i scurry to [my]_2959-i knees , desperate to please [him]_266-jim . [I]_2959-i do n’t know anything about [this guy]_266-jim , but [I]_2959-i do know that at this moment , [I]_2959-i want to be the best sex [he]_266-jim ’s ever had . [I]_2959-i take [him]_266-jim in [my]_2959-i mouth as [I]_2959-i pretend to be [the deep - throat champion of [the world]_{249-the world}]_{334-the deep - throat champion of the world} . [I]_2959-i fist [him]_266-jim hard as [my]_2959-i hand follows [my]_2959-i lips . It ’s been so long , and [I]_2959-i feel [my]_2959-i sex clench , [my]_2959-i orgasm close just from the taste of [his]_266-jim preejaculate . “ Fuck . . . so good , ”_[266-jim] [I]_2959-i murmur around [him]_266-jim . “ The taste of [you]_266-jim is going to make [me]_266-jim come . ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim tips [his]_266-jim head back to the sky and closes [his]_266-jim eyes . “ Naked . [I]_266-jim need [you]_266-jim fucking naked , ”_[266-jim] [he]_266-jim growls with urgency . [He]_266-jim drags [me]_2959-i off the bed and in one moment has [my]_2959-i skirt and panties on the floor . [He]_266-jim pulls [my]_2959-i shirt off over [my]_2959-i head and throws [my]_2959-i bra to the side . Then [he]_266-jim stops still . . . and in slow motion , with [his]_266-jim hands clenched by [his]_266-jim sides , [his]_266-jim eyes drop down [my]_2959-i body . [He]_266-jim drinks [me]_2959-i in , and [I]_2959-i feel the heat as [his]_266-jim gaze skims [my]_2959-i skin . [My]_2959-i world stops spinning , and [I]_2959-i stand before [him]_266-jim naked and vulnerable , waiting for [his]_266-jim approval . This is new for [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i ’ve never been with [a man who ’s so dominant and commanding]_56-robbie . [His]_56-robbie eyes , [his]_56-robbie voice , [his]_56-robbie every touch reminds [me]_2959-i of who [I]_2959-i am with and how much [his]_56-robbie pleasure means to [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i feel like [I]_2959-i want to rise to the challenge , and the primal urge to satisfy [him]_56-robbie is taking [me]_2959-i over . When [his]_56-robbie eyes meet [mine]_2959-i again , they ’re blazing with desire . An undercurrent of darkness and tenderness runs between [us]_337-us . Perhaps [I]_2959-i ’ve forgotten how [a man]_{2300-a man} looks at [a woman]_{339-a woman} when every ounce of [his]_{2300-a man} being wants [her]_{339-a woman} . Because [I]_2959-i swear to [God]_0-aaron , [I]_2959-i ’ve never seen this look before in [my]_2959-i life . “ On [your]_0-aaron back , ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie murmurs . [My]_2959-i face falls in fear . [He]_56-robbie takes [me]_2959-i in [his]_56-robbie arms and kisses [me]_2959-i deeply as [he]_56-robbie holds [my]_2959-i face in [his]_56-robbie hands . “ What is it ? ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie breathes . “ It ’s . . . it ’s been a long time , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pant . “ [I]_56-robbie ’ll take care of [you]_56-robbie , [baby]_56-robbie , ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie whispers softly , which eases [my]_2959-i fears . [His]_56-robbie mouth takes [mine]_2959-i , [his]_56-robbie tongue slowly sliding through [my]_2959-i open lips with just the right amount of suction . [My]_2959-i knees nearly buckle underneath [me]_2959-i . [He]_56-robbie lays [me]_2959-i down and spreads [my]_2959-i legs and smiles darkly as [he]_56-robbie kisses [his]_56-robbie way down [my]_2959-i body . [I]_2959-i stare at the ceiling as [I]_2959-i try to control [my]_2959-i erratic breathing ; no amount of alcohol could have prepared [me]_2959-i for this . [He]_56-robbie lifts [my]_2959-i legs and puts [my]_2959-i feet onto [his]_56-robbie strong shoulders and then drops [my]_2959-i knees wide . [I]_2959-i am completely open for [him]_56-robbie , and [he]_56-robbie takes [me]_2959-i with no reservations and sucks hard . [I]_2959-i buck off the bed . “ Ah ! ”_[56-robbie] [I]_2959-i cry . But [he]_56-robbie gives [me]_2959-i no mercy as [he]_56-robbie drives three of [his]_56-robbie thick fingers into [my]_2959-i sex and begins to pump [me]_2959-i hard . Shit . . . ca n’t [we]_340-we ease into it , at least ? [His]_56-robbie tongue is on [my]_2959-i clitoris , and [his]_56-robbie fingers are on [my]_2959-i G - spot . What the actual hell is going on here ? [My]_2959-i body begins to quiver like a puppet . . . [his]_56-robbie puppet . [The man]_56-robbie ’s [a god]_{341-a god} . [My]_2959-i legs lift off [his]_56-robbie shoulders by [themselves]_{342-themselves} , and [I]_2959-i convulse as a freight train of an orgasm rips through [me]_2959-i . That took approximately five seconds . Oh hell . How embarrassing . Way to act cool . [He]_56-robbie chuckles as if [he]_56-robbie ’s proud , and [I]_2959-i throw the back of [my]_2959-i forearm over [my]_2959-i eyes to hide [my]_2959-i face in shame . [He]_56-robbie pulls [my]_2959-i arm away and takes [my]_2959-i jaw in [his]_56-robbie hand and drags [my]_2959-i face back to [his]_56-robbie . “ Do n’t hide from [me]_56-robbie , [Emily]_186-jameson . Not ever , ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie commands . [My]_2959-i eyes search [his]_56-robbie . This is too full on . . . too much . [This guy]_56-robbie is too intense . “ Answer [me]_56-robbie . ”_[56-robbie] “ What do [you]_186-jameson want [me]_2959-i to say ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ Say yes so that [I]_2959-i know [you]_186-jameson understand . ”_[2959-i] The air crackles between [us]_343-us . “ Yes , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i breathe . “ [I]_2959-i understand . ”_[2959-i] “ [Good girl]_186-jameson , ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie whispers as [he]_56-robbie leans in and kisses [me]_2959-i again . [His]_56-robbie tongue is soft stroking perfection , and [my]_2959-i legs open by [themselves]_{344-themselves} once more . [He]_56-robbie gets up and takes four condoms from [his]_56-robbie wallet , opens one , and hands it to [me]_2959-i . “ Put it on [me]_56-robbie . ”_[56-robbie] [I]_2959-i take it from [him]_56-robbie and bend to kiss [him]_56-robbie softly on [his]_56-robbie dick before [I]_2959-i roll the condom on . “ [You]_56-robbie ’re very bossy . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smirk . [He]_56-robbie smiles broadly as [he]_56-robbie falls onto [his]_56-robbie back , pulls [me]_2959-i over [him]_56-robbie , and drags [my]_2959-i face to [his]_56-robbie . “ [You]_56-robbie ’ll fuck [me]_56-robbie first , ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie murmurs against [my]_2959-i lips , “ and then [I]_56-robbie ’ll fuck [you]_56-robbie when [you]_56-robbie ’re warmed up . ”_[56-robbie] [I]_2959-i smile against [his]_56-robbie mouth . “ [I]_56-robbie only fuck once , [big boy]_{2343-big boy} , and then [I]_56-robbie fall asleep . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie gives [me]_2959-i a slow , sexy smile . [I]_2959-i straddle [his]_56-robbie large body as [our]_345-our kisses become desperate . [His]_56-robbie thick cock is up against [his]_56-robbie stomach , and [he]_56-robbie holds it in the air and guides [my]_2959-i hips down over [him]_56-robbie . Oh , the burn — [he]_56-robbie ’s big . “ Ow , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whimper . “ It ’s okay , ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie whispers . “ Wiggle from side to side . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie cups [my]_2959-i breasts in [his]_56-robbie hands as [he]_56-robbie stares up at [me]_2959-i in what seems like awe . [I]_2959-i smile down at [him]_56-robbie . “ What ? ”_[2959-i] “ From the moment [I]_2959-i saw [you]_56-robbie on [the plane]_{268-the plane} today , [I]_2959-i wanted [you]_56-robbie riding [my]_2959-i cock . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i giggle down at [him]_56-robbie . “ Do [you]_56-robbie always get what [you]_56-robbie want ? ”_[2959-i] “ Always . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie grabs [my]_2959-i hips and slams [me]_2959-i down , and [our]_346-our mouths fall open in pleasure . Oh . . . [he]_56-robbie ’s . . . “ So fucking tight , ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie grinds out . With [our]_346-our eyes locked , [he]_56-robbie slowly moves [me]_2959-i up and down , and [I]_2959-i can feel every vein on [his]_56-robbie thick shaft . [His]_56-robbie eyes are hooded as [he]_56-robbie looks up at [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i lean forward and kiss [him]_56-robbie softly . “ Do [you]_56-robbie know how perfect [you]_56-robbie feel inside [me]_56-robbie ? ”_[56-robbie] [I]_2959-i whisper , and then [I]_2959-i lick [his]_56-robbie open mouth . [His]_56-robbie eyes roll back in [his]_56-robbie head . “ [You]_56-robbie are one hot fuck . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie picks [me]_2959-i up by the hip bones and slams [me]_2959-i back down on [his]_56-robbie cock , and [I]_2959-i laugh out loud at the overwhelming sensation of being filled to the hilt . “ [God]_0-aaron , fill [me]_2959-i up , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i moan . “ Give it to [me]_2959-i , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i beg . [I]_2959-i love how [he]_56-robbie ’s losing control . It ’s making [me]_2959-i crazy . And then as if in some kind of alternate universe , [my]_2959-i mouth latches on to [his]_56-robbie neck , and [I]_2959-i suck hard as [I]_2959-i ride [him]_56-robbie . [He]_56-robbie hisses , and as if [he]_56-robbie ’s completely losing control , [he]_56-robbie bucks [me]_2959-i off and pulls out and throws [me]_2959-i onto [my]_2959-i back . [He]_56-robbie lifts [my]_2959-i legs over [his]_56-robbie shoulders and slams in deep — so deep that the air is knocked from [my]_2959-i lungs . [I]_2959-i smile . So [he]_56-robbie likes dirty talk , does [he]_56-robbie ? Well , that just happens to be [my]_2959-i specialty . Game on . [I]_2959-i hold [his]_56-robbie face in [my]_2959-i hands . “ [God]_0-aaron , [you]_0-aaron ’ve got a beautiful cock , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ Is it weeping for [me]_2959-i , [baby]_0-aaron ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper as [I]_2959-i clench around [him]_56-robbie . “ [I]_56-robbie can feel [your]_0-aaron pulse in it . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie gives [me]_2959-i a slow , sexy smile as [he]_56-robbie pumps [me]_2959-i . “ [I]_56-robbie ’m going to rip this condom off and blow in [your]_0-aaron dirty mouth in a minute . ”_[56-robbie] “ Please . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i laugh as [he]_56-robbie pumps [me]_2959-i hard , and in a moment of perfect clarity , [he]_56-robbie turns [his]_56-robbie head and tenderly kisses [my]_2959-i inner ankle . [We]_347-we stare at each other as something intimate runs between [us]_347-we . A closeness that the reality of the situation should n’t allow . “ Do n’t look at [me]_2959-i like that , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper to break the seriousness of the moment , “ or [I]_2959-i ’m going to give [you]_2959-i another hickey . ”_[2959-i] [His]_56-robbie eyes widen . “ [I]_56-robbie better not have a fucking hickey , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_[56-robbie] [I]_2959-i laugh out loud as [I]_2959-i look at the huge purple welt rising on [his]_56-robbie neck . God , what the hell ? [I]_2959-i ’ve been reading way too many vampire romances . “ Will [you]_2959-i be in trouble with [[your]_2959-i mother]_{2345-your mother} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i tease . [He]_56-robbie laughs and slams into [me]_2959-i and hits just the right spot , and [I]_2959-i moan . Oh . . . [this man]_56-robbie knows [his]_56-robbie way around [a woman]_{339-a woman} ’s body . Every touch is perfectly placed and magnified . [He]_56-robbie knows exactly how to take [me]_2959-i apart at the seams . [He]_56-robbie lifts [my]_2959-i hip with [his]_56-robbie hand and circles deep , and [my]_2959-i body takes on its own agenda because [I]_2959-i need to come . Hard . “ Fuck [me]_2959-i , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i beg . “ Give [me]_2959-i that beautiful cock of [yours]_2959-i . Harder , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i moan . “ Fuck , [I]_56-robbie need it harder . ”_[56-robbie] [His]_56-robbie eyes close in pleasure , and [he]_56-robbie pumps [me]_2959-i at piston pace . [I]_2959-i grab on to [him]_56-robbie as tightly as [I]_2959-i can as [I]_2959-i convulse . [He]_56-robbie holds [himself]_56-robbie deep and cries out into [my]_2959-i neck , and [I]_2959-i feel [his]_56-robbie cock jerk as it releases . [We]_349-we pant as [we]_349-we cling to each other , wet with perspiration , [our]_349-we hearts racing wildly together , and [he]_56-robbie smiles up against [my]_2959-i cheek as if remembering something . “ What ? ”_[56-robbie] “ Welcome to [the Miles - High Club]_{2346-the miles - high club} , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i giggle as [I]_2959-i kiss [him]_56-robbie . “ [First class]_{310-first class} is the only way to fly . ”_[266-jim] [Jim]_266-jim smiles sexily down at [me]_2959-i as [I]_2959-i lie naked in bed . [He]_56-robbie ’s dressed , and [his]_56-robbie bag is packed and by the door . “ [I]_56-robbie have to go . ”_[56-robbie] [I]_2959-i screw up [my]_2959-i face and hold out [my]_2959-i arms . “ No , do n’t leave [me]_2959-i , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i tease in a whiny voice . [He]_56-robbie chuckles as [he]_56-robbie bends and takes [me]_2959-i into [his]_56-robbie arms one last time . [We]_350-we ’re not on the same plane back to [New York]_{385-new york} this morning ; [his]_56-robbie flight leaves early , and [mine]_2959-i leaves late . [He]_56-robbie kisses [me]_2959-i softly . “ What a night , ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie whispers . [I]_2959-i smile as [his]_56-robbie head drops to the crook of [my]_2959-i neck , [his]_56-robbie teeth nipping down toward [my]_2959-i collarbone . “ [I]_2959-i wo n’t be walking for a month — actually , a year , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i mutter dryly . [He]_56-robbie bends and bites [my]_2959-i nipple hard , and [I]_2959-i jump . Then [he]_56-robbie comes back up , and [his]_56-robbie eyes meet [mine]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i cup [his]_56-robbie handsome face . “ [I]_56-robbie had an incredible night . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie smiles softly . “ [Me]_56-robbie too . ”_[56-robbie] [I]_2959-i reach up and put [my]_2959-i finger on the huge hickey on [his]_56-robbie neck , and [his]_56-robbie fingers go to it too . “ What the fuck were [you]_56-robbie thinking ? ”_[56-robbie] “ [I]_2959-i have no idea what came over [me]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i giggle . “ [Your]_56-robbie dick was too good , turned [me]_56-robbie into an animal . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie bites [me]_2959-i again . “ How am [I]_56-robbie supposed to get on [a plane]_{2325-a plane} with a huge - ass hickey on [my]_56-robbie neck ? ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie scolds . “ If [you]_56-robbie knew how many important meetings [I]_56-robbie have this week , [Emily]_186-jameson . . . ”_[56-robbie] [We]_351-we both laugh , and then [his]_56-robbie face falls as [he]_56-robbie watches [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i ’m not joking — [I]_2959-i do n’t want [him]_56-robbie to leave [me]_2959-i . [This man]_56-robbie is everything [I]_2959-i ’m not looking for , but [he]_56-robbie ’s somehow ticking every box . What if [I]_2959-i never see [him]_56-robbie again ? How am [I]_2959-i supposed to move on from a night like this , erase it from [my]_2959-i memory bank , and pretend it never happened ? [I]_2959-i close [my]_2959-i eyes in disgust with [myself]_2959-i . This is why [I]_2959-i do n’t do one - night stands . [I]_2959-i ’m not cut out for sex without strings — it ’s not who [I]_2959-i am . [I]_2959-i will never be [that person]_{352-that person} . [I]_2959-i hate that [he]_56-robbie is . “ Actually , [I]_2959-i have a scarf in [my]_2959-i bag . Do [you]_2959-i want it ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ Yes , ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie snaps . [I]_2959-i climb out of bed and go to [my]_2959-i suitcase and begin to rummage through it . [He]_56-robbie takes the opportunity and stands behind [me]_2959-i and grabs [my]_2959-i naked hip bones in [his]_56-robbie hands and pumps [me]_2959-i with [his]_56-robbie hips . [I]_2959-i stand and turn to face [him]_56-robbie . “ [I]_56-robbie ’m not even joking now — stay another night . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie traces [his]_56-robbie finger down [my]_2959-i face and cups [my]_2959-i jaw in [his]_56-robbie hand as [our]_353-our eyes lock . “ [I]_56-robbie ca n’t , ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie whispers , [his]_56-robbie eyes searching [mine]_2959-i . . . with something unspoken . Does [he]_56-robbie have [someone]_2326-someone at [home]_2289-home ? Is that why [he]_56-robbie has n’t asked for [my]_2959-i number ? Uneasiness fills [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i ’m not made for this one - night stand crap . [I]_2959-i turn [my]_2959-i back on [him]_56-robbie and dig out the scarf and hand it over . It ’s cream and cashmere , and it ’s initialed . E.F. [[My]_2959-i mother]_{356-my mother} ’s tennis group gave it to [me]_2959-i as a gift when [I]_2959-i finished college . [I]_2959-i did love it . . . but oh well . [He]_56-robbie frowns as [he]_56-robbie looks down at the embroidered letters , and [I]_2959-i take it from [him]_56-robbie and wrap it around [his]_56-robbie neck to cover the huge purple bruise . [I]_2959-i smirk as [I]_2959-i look at it . [I]_2959-i did n’t even know how to give a hickey . [I]_2959-i must have really been in the moment . “ What does the F stand for ? ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie asks . “ Fuck bunny . ”_[56-robbie] [I]_2959-i smile to cover [my]_2959-i disappointment . [I]_2959-i do n’t want [him]_56-robbie to know that [his]_56-robbie last comment upset [me]_2959-i . [He]_56-robbie chuckles and grabs [me]_2959-i roughly into [his]_56-robbie arms and walks [me]_2959-i back toward the bed . “ What an apt description that is . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie takes [my]_2959-i leg and wraps it around [his]_56-robbie waist , and [we]_357-we share one last lingering kiss . “ Goodbye , [my]_56-robbie beautiful fuck bunny , ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie whispers . [I]_2959-i run [my]_2959-i fingers through [his]_56-robbie hair as [I]_2959-i stare at [his]_56-robbie gorgeous face . “ Goodbye , Blue Eyes . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie picks the scarf up and inhales deeply . “ This smells like [you]_56-robbie . ”_[56-robbie] “ Put it on every time [you]_56-robbie jerk off . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile sweetly . “ Imagine it ’s [me]_56-robbie doing all the work . ”_[56-robbie] [His]_56-robbie eyes flicker with excitement . “ [You]_56-robbie know , for someone who has n’t had sex for eighteen months , [you]_56-robbie ’re [a fucking sex maniac]_{2349-a fucking sex maniac} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i giggle . “ [I]_56-robbie ’ll go back to [my]_56-robbie drought now . It ’s safe there . . . and [I]_56-robbie can walk unassisted . ”_[56-robbie] [His]_56-robbie face falls , and [I]_2959-i feel like [he]_56-robbie wants to say something but is stopping [himself]_56-robbie . “ [You]_56-robbie ’re going to miss [[your]_56-robbie plane]_{2350-your plane} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i fake a smile . [We]_358-we kiss once more , and [I]_2959-i hold [him]_56-robbie tight , and [God]_0-aaron , [he]_56-robbie really is incredible . [He]_56-robbie stands , and with one last lingering look at [me]_2959-i lying naked in the bed , [he]_56-robbie turns and walks out . [I]_2959-i smile sadly at the door [he]_56-robbie just left through . “ Yes , sure , [you]_56-robbie can have [my]_2959-i number , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper into the silence . But [he]_56-robbie did n’t want it . [He]_56-robbie ’s gone . Twelve months later [I]_2959-i exhale and put [my]_2959-i hand over [my]_2959-i heart as [I]_2959-i stand on the curbside and look up at [the glass skyscraper in front of [me]_2959-i]_{359-the glass skyscraper in front of me} . [My]_2959-i phone rings , and the name [Mom]_70-mom lights up the screen . “ Hello , [Mom]_70-mom . ”_[70-mom] [I]_2959-i smile . [I]_2959-i get a vision of [[my]_2959-i beautiful mother]_70-mom . [She]_70-mom has a perfect blonde bob and flawless skin , and [she]_70-mom ’s always immaculately dressed . If [I]_2959-i can look half as good as [her]_70-mom at [her]_70-mom age , [I]_2959-i will be winning at life . [I]_2959-i miss [her]_70-mom already . “ Oh , [darling]_2959-i , [I]_2959-i just called to wish [you]_2959-i good luck . ”_[2959-i] “ Thank [you]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i tap [my]_2959-i toe , unable to stand still . “ [I]_2959-i ’m so nervous [I]_2959-i was throwing up this morning . ”_[2959-i] “ [They]_2351-they ’re going to love [you]_2959-i , [dear]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] “ Oh God . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i exhale heavily . “ [I]_2959-i hope so . It took [me]_2959-i six damn interviews to get this job , and [I]_2959-i had to move across [the country]_{2320-the country} for it . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i screw up [my]_2959-i face in fear . “ Have [I]_2959-i done the right thing , [Mom]_70-mom ? ”_[2959-i] “ Yes , love , this job is [your]_2959-i dream , and besides , [you]_2959-i needed to get away from [Robbie]_56-robbie . The distance from [him]_56-robbie will do [you]_2959-i good . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes . “ [Mom]_70-mom , do n’t bring [Robbie]_56-robbie into it . ”_[2959-i] “ [Darling]_72-darling , [you]_72-darling ’re dating a man who is unemployed and lives in [[[his]_56-robbie parents]_{2353-his parents} ’ garage]_{2354-his parents ’ garage} . [I]_2959-i do n’t understand what [you]_72-darling see in [him]_56-robbie . ”_[2959-i] “ [He]_56-robbie ’s just between jobs at the moment . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sigh . “ Then if [he]_56-robbie ’s got nothing going on here , why would n’t [he]_56-robbie move to [New York]_{385-new york} with [you]_72-darling ? ”_[2959-i] “ [He]_56-robbie does n’t like [New York]_{385-new york} . It ’s too busy for [him]_56-robbie . ”_[2959-i] “ Oh , [Emily]_186-jameson , can [you]_186-jameson hear the excuses [you]_186-jameson make for [this man]_56-robbie ? If [he]_56-robbie loved [you]_186-jameson , [he]_56-robbie would be there supporting [your]_186-jameson dream , since [he]_56-robbie does n’t have any of [his]_56-robbie own . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i exhale heavily . [I]_2959-i ’ve been thinking these things [myself]_2959-i , but no way in hell would [I]_2959-i admit it to [anyone]_272-anyone . “ Are [you]_186-jameson calling [me]_2959-i to stress [me]_2959-i out about [Robbie]_56-robbie , or are [you]_186-jameson calling [me]_2959-i to wish [me]_2959-i luck ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . “ [I]_2959-i ’m calling [you]_186-jameson to wish [you]_186-jameson luck . Good luck , [darling]_186-jameson . Go and show [them]_2355-them what [you]_186-jameson ’re made of . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i jiggle on the spot nervously as [I]_2959-i look at [the towering building above [me]_2959-i]_{361-the building} . “ Thanks . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i ’ll call [you]_186-jameson tonight for a full debrief . ”_[2959-i] “ Okay . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . “ [I]_2959-i ’m going to go in . ”_[2959-i] “ Go get ’em , tiger . ”_[362-she] [She]_362-she hangs up . [I]_2959-i stare up at [the building]_{361-the building} and at the fancy gold letters over the large double front doors . MILES MEDIA [I]_2959-i exhale and drop [my]_2959-i shoulders . “ Right . [You]_186-jameson can do this . ”_[2959-i] This is the opportunity of all opportunities . [Miles Media]_{68-miles media} is [the biggest conglomerate media empire in [the United States]_{10-the united states}]_{68-miles media} and one of the largest in [the world]_{249-the world} , with over [two thousand staff based in [New York]_{385-new york} alone]_{364-two thousand staff based in new york alone} . [My]_2959-i fascination with journalism started in the eighth grade when [I]_2959-i witnessed a car accident on [my]_2959-i way [home]_2289-home from [school]_366-school one day . Because [I]_2959-i was [the only witness]_{367-the only witness} , [I]_2959-i had to give a statement to [the police]_{368-the police} , and then when it turned out that [the car]_{369-the car} was stolen , the local paper came and interviewed [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i felt like [a rock star that day , and the shine]_{370-a rock star that day , and the shine} never dulled . [I]_2959-i ’ve been to college to study journalism and done internships with [the best companies in [the United States]_{10-the united states}]_{371-the best companies in the united states} . But it was [Miles Media]_{68-miles media} that [I]_2959-i had [my]_2959-i heart set on . [Their]_372-their stories are a cut above the rest ; [no other media company]_{373-no other media company} would do . [I]_2959-i ’ve applied for every position that has come up for three years and only recently got a callback . And even then , [I]_2959-i went to six interviews before [I]_2959-i was offered the job , and [God]_0-aaron , just do n’t let [me]_2959-i screw this up . [I]_2959-i take out [my]_2959-i security card and put the lanyard around [my]_2959-i neck , and [I]_2959-i glance down at [my]_2959-i phone . No missed calls . [Robbie]_56-robbie did n’t even call [me]_2959-i to wish [me]_2959-i luck . [Ugh]_61-ugh , [men]_330-men . [I]_2959-i make [my]_2959-i way to reception . The security guard at the front desk accepts [my]_2959-i identification , and [I]_2959-i am given a code to work [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} . [My]_2959-i heart is beating so fast as [I]_2959-i get into [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} with all [the beautiful posh - looking people]_{376-the beautiful posh - looking people} , and [I]_2959-i push the button for the fortieth floor . [I]_2959-i glance over at [myself]_2959-i in the mirrored doors . [I]_2959-i ’m wearing a black pencil skirt that hangs to midcalf , sheer black stockings with patent leather high heels , and a cream long - sleeved silk blouse . [I]_2959-i wanted to look professional and elegant . [I]_2959-i ’m not sure if [I]_2959-i pulled it off , but here ’s hoping . [I]_2959-i pull [my]_2959-i hand through [my]_2959-i thick dark ponytail as [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} flies higher and higher . [I]_2959-i take a side glance at [the others in [the elevator]_{375-the elevator}]_{377-the others in the elevator} . [The men]_{378-the men} are all in expensive suits , and [the women]_{379-the women} are ultraprofessional and wearing full faces of makeup . Damn it , [I]_2959-i should have worn bright lipstick . [I]_2959-i ’ll buy one on [my]_2959-i lunch break . The doors open on the fortieth floor , and [I]_2959-i stride out as if [I]_2959-i do n’t have a fear in [the world]_{249-the world} . Faking confidence is [my]_2959-i superpower , and today [I]_2959-i ’m totally faking it till [I]_2959-i make it . Or at least die trying . “ Hello . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile at [the kind - looking woman standing by reception]_{381-the kind - looking woman standing by reception} . “ [I]_{381-the kind - looking woman standing by reception} ’m [Emily Foster]_186-jameson . [I]_{381-the kind - looking woman standing by reception} ’m starting today . ”_{[381-the kind - looking woman standing by reception]} [She]_{381-the kind - looking woman standing by reception} smiles broadly . “ Hello , [Emily]_186-jameson , [my]_{381-the kind - looking woman standing by reception} name is [Frances]_73-frances , and [I]_{381-the kind - looking woman standing by reception} am [one of [the floor managers]_{2356-the floor managers}]_73-frances . ”_{[381-the kind - looking woman standing by reception]} [She]_{381-the kind - looking woman standing by reception} steps over to [me]_2959-i and shakes [my]_2959-i hand . “ Lovely to meet [you]_186-jameson . ”_{[381-the kind - looking woman standing by reception]} Well , [she]_{381-the kind - looking woman standing by reception} seems nice . “ Come through , and [I]_{381-the kind - looking woman standing by reception} ’ll show [you]_186-jameson to [your]_186-jameson desk . ”_{[381-the kind - looking woman standing by reception]} [She]_{381-the kind - looking woman standing by reception} walks off , and [I]_2959-i peer into [the huge office space]_{361-the building} . The tables are grouped into lots of four or six with partitions separating [them]_383-them from the others . “ As [you]_186-jameson know , [each floor of [this building]_{361-the building}]_{2357-each floor of this building} is a different arm of [the company]_{2358-the company} , ”_{[381-the kind - looking woman standing by reception]} [she]_{381-the kind - looking woman standing by reception} says as [she]_{381-the kind - looking woman standing by reception} walks . “ [We]_2359-we have internationals and magazines from floor twenty down . [Floors thirty to forty]_{2360-floors thirty to forty} are news and current affairs , and above forty are television and cable . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i nod nervously . “ The two top levels of [the building]_{361-the building} are senior management only , and [your]_186-jameson security card wo n’t get [you]_186-jameson up there . It ’s customary for [new employees]_{2361-new employees} to be taken on a guided tour of [the building]_{361-the building} , and [Lindsey]_74-lindsey from human resources will come and get [you]_186-jameson at two o’clock this afternoon . ”_[2959-i] “ Okay , great . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile as [I]_2959-i feel [my]_2959-i confidence seep out into the carpet . [God]_0-aaron , this is all so professional . “ [Most people]_{2362-most people} start on level four and work [their]_{2362-most people} way up [the building]_{361-the building} , so congratulations for starting on level forty . That in itself is amazing . ”_{[381-the kind - looking woman standing by reception]} [She]_{381-the kind - looking woman standing by reception} smiles broadly . “ Thank [you]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reply nervously . [She]_{381-the kind - looking woman standing by reception} leads [me]_2959-i over to a group of four desks by the window and pulls out a chair . “ This is [your]_186-jameson desk . ”_{[381-the kind - looking woman standing by reception]} “ Oh . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i feel the blood drain from [my]_2959-i face . [I]_2959-i ’ve totally bitten off more than [I]_2959-i can chew here . [I]_2959-i fall into [my]_2959-i seat as panic begins to rise in [my]_2959-i stomach . “ Hello , ”_{[2300-a man]} [a man]_{2300-a man} says as [he]_{2300-a man} sits in the seat beside [me]_2959-i . “ [I]_{2300-a man} ’m [Aaron]_0-aaron . ”_{[2300-a man]} [He]_{2300-a man} reaches over and shakes [my]_2959-i hand with a broad smile . “ [You]_186-jameson must be [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_{[2300-a man]} “ Hi , [Aaron]_0-aaron , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper , feeling totally inadequate . “ [I]_73-frances ’ll leave [you]_186-jameson in [Aaron]_0-aaron ’s safe hands . ”_[73-frances] [Frances]_73-frances smiles . “ Thank [you]_186-jameson . ”_[73-frances] “ Have a great day . ”_[73-frances] [She]_73-frances returns to reception . And [I]_2959-i stare at the computer on [my]_2959-i desk as [my]_2959-i heart begins to beat violently . “ Are [you]_186-jameson excited ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron asks . “ Oh [[my]_2959-i God]_{2363-my god} , [I]_2959-i ’m petrified , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper as [I]_2959-i turn to [him]_0-aaron . “ [I]_0-aaron ’ve never done this job before . [I]_0-aaron usually find the stories with [[my]_0-aaron group]_{2364-my group} . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron smiles warmly . “ Do n’t worry ; [we]_2365-we all felt the same when [we]_2365-we started , but [they]_2365-we would n’t have given [you]_0-aaron the job if [they]_2365-we did n’t think [you]_0-aaron could do it . ”_[0-aaron] [I]_2959-i give [him]_0-aaron a lopsided smile . “ [I]_0-aaron just do n’t want to let [anyone]_272-anyone down . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron reaches over and puts [his]_0-aaron hand on top of [mine]_2959-i . “ [You]_0-aaron wo n’t . [This team]_{2367-this team} is great , and [we]_2365-we help [each other]_{2339-each other} . ”_[0-aaron] [I]_2959-i glance down at [his]_0-aaron hand on [mine]_2959-i . “ Oh . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron pulls it away as [he]_0-aaron notices [my]_2959-i discomfort . “ [I]_0-aaron ’m totally gay and way too touchy , apparently . Tell [me]_0-aaron if [I]_0-aaron get in [your]_0-aaron space . [I]_0-aaron have no sphere of reference . ”_[0-aaron] [I]_2959-i smile , grateful for [his]_0-aaron honesty . “ Okay . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i look around [the office]_{385-new york} as [people]_248-people file in . “ How long have [you]_0-aaron worked [here]_{385-new york} ? ”_[2959-i] “ Four years . [I]_0-aaron love it . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron shivers [his]_0-aaron shoulders to accentuate [his]_0-aaron point . “ Best job [I]_0-aaron ’ve ever had . [I]_0-aaron moved from [San Fran]_{11-san fran} for it . ”_[0-aaron] “ [I]_2959-i moved from [California]_{12-california} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile proudly . “ [You]_0-aaron here by [yourself]_0-aaron ? ”_[0-aaron] [he]_0-aaron asks . “ Yeah . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug . “ [I]_2959-i got [a little one - bedroom apartment]_2369-there . [I]_2959-i arrived on Friday . ”_[2959-i] “ What did [you]_0-aaron do all weekend ? ”_[0-aaron] [he]_0-aaron asks . “ Freaked out about today . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron laughs . “ Do n’t worry . [We]_2370-we ’ve all been [there]_2369-there . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i look around at the two other empty chairs . “ Who else do [we]_2370-we work with ? ”_[2959-i] “ [Molly]_198-molly . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron points to the chair behind [me]_2959-i . “ [She]_198-molly does n’t start until nine thirty . [She]_198-molly ’s [a single mom]_{2371-a single mom} and has to get [[her]_198-molly kids]_{2372-her kids} off to [school]_366-school first . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile ; [I]_2959-i like that . “ And [Ava]_77-ava — [she]_198-molly ’s just late because [she]_198-molly probably went out last night partying . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . [He]_0-aaron rolls [his]_0-aaron eyes . “ [She]_198-molly ’s [a deplorable party girl]_198-molly , and [she]_198-molly ’s never at [her]_198-molly desk — always finds somewhere [she]_198-molly has to be . ”_[0-aaron] “ Hello , ”_{[387-a girl]} [a girl]_{387-a girl} says as [she]_{387-a girl} runs up [the aisle]_{388-the aisle} and sits down in [her]_{387-a girl} chair . [She]_{387-a girl} ’s panting and holds out [her]_{387-a girl} hand . “ [I]_{387-a girl} ’m [Ava]_77-ava . ”_{[387-a girl]} [I]_2959-i shake [her]_{387-a girl} hand and smile . “ [I]_77-ava ’m [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_[77-ava] [Ava]_77-ava is younger than [me]_2959-i and very attractive , with a honey - colored bob and dramatic makeup . [She]_77-ava ’s trendy and very [New York]_{385-new york} . “ Open up [your]_186-jameson computer , [Emily]_186-jameson , and [I]_0-aaron ’ll show [you]_186-jameson through [our]_2374-our programs , ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron says . “ Okay , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reply as [I]_2959-i concentrate on [my]_2959-i task . “ Oh [my]_77-ava God , [Aaron]_0-aaron , ”_[77-ava] [Ava]_77-ava says . “ [I]_77-ava met [the hottest fucking guy]_{2375-the hottest fucking guy} last night . ”_[77-ava] “ Here [we]_2374-our go . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron sighs . “ [You]_0-aaron meet [the hottest fucking guy]_{2375-the hottest fucking guy} every night . ”_[0-aaron] [I]_2959-i find [myself]_2959-i smiling as [I]_2959-i listen to [them]_389-them . “ No , seriously , this time [I]_2959-i mean it . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i glance over at [Aaron]_0-aaron , and [he]_0-aaron smirks at [me]_2959-i and rolls [his]_0-aaron eyes as if [he]_0-aaron ’s heard it all before . [She]_77-ava gets to work , and [Aaron]_0-aaron goes through and explains the programs as [I]_2959-i take notes . “ At ten o’clock the stories will start coming in . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i listen intently . “ [We]_2376-we , as [reporters]_{2377-reporters} , go through [them]_389-them and all say yay or nay as to whether it ’s got legs and if [we]_2376-we go and report on it . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ But how will [I]_2959-i know that ? ”_[2959-i] “ [We]_2376-we just vote yes for stuff that interests [us]_2376-we , [I]_77-ava suppose , ”_[77-ava] [Ava]_77-ava says . “ Obviously , news stories that are breaking are crucial , but it ’s the other content that [they]_389-them pay [us]_2376-we for . ”_[77-ava] [She]_77-ava reads an email . “ For example , [three coffee shops]_{2378-three coffee shops} have closed down in one week within two blocks from each other . ”_[77-ava] [She]_77-ava rolls [her]_77-ava eyes . “ Honestly , who gives a fuck ? This is n’t news . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i giggle . “ Here ’s one . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron reads out , “ [A driver]_{2379-a driver} has been clocked traveling at one hundred fifty - five miles per hour , and [he]_{2379-a driver} ran a police stop sign . [He]_{2379-a driver} was involved in a hot pursuit and ended up crashing into [parked cars]_{2380-parked cars} in [Brooklyn]_13-brooklyn . ”_[77-ava] [Ava]_77-ava nods . “ Yeah , that ’s good . ”_[77-ava] “ [We]_2376-we ’ll go with that . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron types something and puts the file into a saved folder . “ So how does this work ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ [We]_2376-we collect stories , and then [we]_2376-we discuss collectively what [each of [us]_2376-we]_{2381-each of us} has done and put together a list of stories . [You]_2382-you research [your]_2382-you stories and have [them]_{2381-each of us} in by four each day for the next day ’s news . Then [we]_2376-we send [them]_{2381-each of us} on to [Hayden]_266-jim , and [he]_0-aaron sends [them]_{2381-each of us} to editing . Obviously , if a good story comes in , it will take priority over everything else , and it will go to live news immediately . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown as [I]_2959-i listen . “ So [we]_2376-we each get [our]_2376-we own stories and leads sent to [us]_391-us ? ”_[2959-i] “ Yes , by email . By [others on this level]_{2383-others on this level} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i glance around at [all the workers surrounding [us]_391-us]_{390-all the workers surrounding us} . “ [We]_391-us keep [our]_391-us finger on the pulse of what sells and what news really is , ”_[77-ava] [Ava]_77-ava replies . “ It ’s the coolest job ever . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . Maybe [I]_2959-i really can do this . “ Open [your]_0-aaron emails . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron reaches over and opens something for [me]_2959-i on [my]_2959-i computer , and then [I]_2959-i watch as it keeps pinging . “ Those are all possible stories ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ Yes . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron throws [me]_2959-i a playful wink . “ Get reading , [baby]_336-yay . [They]_391-us come in thick and fast . ”_[0-aaron] [I]_2959-i smile as excitement runs through [me]_2959-i . “ Just make sure [you]_2385-you get story details right . Nothing pisses management off more than incorrect names . [You]_2385-you will get into huge trouble . ”_[2959-i] “ Got it . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ’ve just gotten back from lunch when [my]_2959-i phone rings . “ Hi , [Emily]_186-jameson , this is [Lindsey]_74-lindsey from human resources . [I]_2959-i ’ll be up in about five minutes to get [you]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] the kind voice says on the phone . [I]_2959-i wince . Oh , that ’s right — [I]_2959-i have that damn building tour . “ Okay , thank [you]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i hang up . “ Oh no , [I]_2959-i have to go on the office tour , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper to [[my]_2959-i colleagues]_{392-my colleagues} . “ That ’s okay , ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron replies as [he]_0-aaron continues reading [his]_0-aaron emails . “ [I]_2959-i ’ve got so many leads , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer . “ [I]_2959-i ca n’t keep up . ”_[2959-i] “ Do n’t worry . It ’s fine , ”_[0-aaron] [he]_0-aaron comforts [me]_2959-i . “ What if [I]_0-aaron miss a really important story ? ”_[0-aaron] “ [You]_186-jameson won’t — it ’s fine . [I]_2959-i ’ll go through [yours]_186-jameson while [you]_186-jameson ’re gone . ”_[2959-i] “ Really ? ”_[2959-i] “ Of course it is . [You]_186-jameson are n’t expected to know everything on day one . ”_[0-aaron] “ Oh no , [you]_186-jameson have to go to the top . ”_[77-ava] [Ava]_77-ava grimaces . “ What ’s the top ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ Upper - management offices . ”_[2959-i] “ [They]_2386-they ’re not nice ? ”_[0-aaron] “ No , [they]_2386-they ’re fucking horrible , and [you]_186-jameson have a good chance of being fired on the spot . ”_[2959-i] “ What ? ”_[2959-i] “ Oh , bullshit . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron rolls [his]_0-aaron eyes . “ [They]_2386-they just do n’t . . . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron screws up [his]_0-aaron face as [he]_0-aaron chooses [his]_0-aaron words . “ [They]_2386-they do n’t fluff . If something is going to be said , [they]_2386-they just say it how it is . [They]_2386-they do n’t take any shit from [anyone]_272-anyone . ”_[0-aaron] “ Who are [they]_2386-they ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ Well , [Mr. Miles wo]_{79-mr. miles} n’t be there . [He]_{79-mr. miles} never is . [I]_2959-i think [he]_{79-mr. miles} ’s in [London]_6-london . ”_[2959-i] “ [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask as [I]_2959-i feel [my]_2959-i nerves dance . “ [The CEO]_{2388-the ceo} . ”_[2959-i] “ Yes , [I]_2959-i know who [he]_{79-mr. miles} is . [I]_2959-i think [everyone]_{2304-everyone} does . Although [I]_2959-i ’ve never seen a picture of [him]_{79-mr. miles} . It ’s [him]_{79-mr. miles} and [[his]_{79-mr. miles} brothers]_{2390-his brothers} , right ? ”_[2959-i] “ Yes , it ’s [the Miles family who owns everything]_{2391-the miles family who owns everything} . [He]_{79-mr. miles} and [[his]_{79-mr. miles} three brothers]_{2390-his brothers} . ”_[2959-i] “ And [they]_{2390-his brothers} ’re all [upstairs]_{2392-upstairs} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper as [I]_2959-i quickly take out the bright lipstick [I]_2959-i bought at lunch and reapply . [I]_2959-i need some courage here . “ Just do n’t say anything stupid up in the management levels , ”_[77-ava] [Ava]_77-ava says . [My]_2959-i eyes widen . “ Like what ? What do [they]_{2390-his brothers} consider stupid ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ’m really beginning to panic . “ Just keep [your]_2959-i mouth shut , take the tour , and do n’t tell [HR]_80-hr anything . ”_[2959-i] “ Why not ? ”_[2959-i] “ Because [they]_{2390-his brothers} ’re on speed dial to the management levels . This whole tour [you]_2959-i ’re taking now is just so [they]_{2390-his brothers} can do a personality assessment on [you]_2959-i in the two hours it takes [them]_{2390-his brothers} to show [you]_2959-i around . ”_[2959-i] “ Oh [[my]_2959-i God]_{2363-my god} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sigh . “ Hi , [Emily]_186-jameson , is it ? [I]_2959-i ’m [Lindsey]_74-lindsey . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i turn to see [a beautiful blonde]_{393-a beautiful blonde} , and [I]_2959-i stand immediately and put out [my]_2959-i hand . “ Hello . ”_{[393-a beautiful blonde]} [She]_{393-a beautiful blonde} smiles at [my]_2959-i coworkers . “ Let ’s get started . [We]_397-we will go down to level one and work [our]_397-we way up . ”_{[393-a beautiful blonde]} [I]_2959-i give [my]_2959-i new work [friends]_394-friends a nervous wave and follow [her]_{393-a beautiful blonde} out of [the office]_{385-new york} and into [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} . Here [we]_397-we go . An hour and a half later “ And this is [the gymnasium]_{400-the gymnasium} , for [[our]_397-we staff]_{2394-our staff} ’s own personal use . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i look around at [the expansive and swanky - looking gym on level sixty]_{398-the expansive and swanky - looking gym on level sixty} . “ Wow . ”_[2959-i] “ It ’s open from six in the morning until six thirty at night . It ’s busiest before work , obviously , but [you]_2395-you can come here on [your]_2395-you lunch break also . A lot of [people]_248-people take a late or early lunch so that it ’s not as busy when [they]_248-people come . ”_[2959-i] [This place]_{399-sky bar} is ridiculous . [A cafeteria on level two that is the entire floor]_{400-the gymnasium} , [a movie theater]_{401-a movie theater} , [a gymnasium]_{402-a gymnasium} , a mailroom floor , a computer geek floor . Everything has been thought out with such care . “ Okay , let ’s get going . ”_[74-lindsey] [Lindsey]_74-lindsey smiles . “ [We]_397-we will head up to [the management floors]_{2397-the management floors} now . ”_[74-lindsey] [My]_2959-i stomach dances with nerves as [we]_397-we head back into [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} . [She]_74-lindsey gets in and looks at the buttons . “ Oh look , [you]_2395-you ’re in luck . ”_[74-lindsey] [I]_2959-i frown in question . “ [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} is here . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i fake a smile . “ [I]_2959-i ’ll take [you]_2395-you to meet [him]_{79-mr. miles} first . ”_[2959-i] Oh God . Do n’t speak . Do n’t say anything stupid , [I]_2959-i remind [myself]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i twist [my]_2959-i fingers in front of [me]_2959-i nervously as [we]_397-we ride to the top floor . The doors open , and [I]_2959-i step out of [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} and stop still . What the hell ? White marble for as far as [I]_2959-i can see , floor - to - ceiling glass , and luxurious white leather furnishings . “ Hello , [Sammia]_246-alan . ”_[74-lindsey] [Lindsey]_74-lindsey smiles as [I]_2959-i look around in awe . [This place]_{399-sky bar} is insane . [A beautiful woman]_{404-a beautiful woman} looks up from [her]_{404-a beautiful woman} computer at reception , and [she]_{404-a beautiful woman} smiles warmly . “ Hello , [Lindsey]_74-lindsey . ”_{[404-a beautiful woman]} “ This is [Emily]_186-jameson . [She]_186-jameson ’s new and started on level forty today . ”_[246-alan] [Sammia]_246-alan comes around and shakes [my]_2959-i hand . “ [Lovely]_82-lovely to meet [you]_246-alan , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_[246-alan] “ Is [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} taking [visitors]_{2398-visitors} ? ”_[74-lindsey] [Lindsey]_74-lindsey asks . “ [He]_{79-mr. miles} is . ”_[74-lindsey] [She]_74-lindsey smiles . “ [I]_74-lindsey ’ll just announce [you]_246-alan . ”_[74-lindsey] Announce [me]_2959-i . . . jeez . [Lindsey]_74-lindsey hunches [her]_74-lindsey shoulders as if [she]_74-lindsey ’s nervous too . [Sammia]_246-alan picks up the phone . “ [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} , [we]_2399-we have [a new staff member]_{2400-a new staff member} to meet [you]_246-alan in reception . ”_[246-alan] [She]_74-lindsey listens for a moment and smiles . “ Yes , [sir]_246-alan . ”_[74-lindsey] [She]_74-lindsey puts the phone down . “ Just go in . ”_[74-lindsey] “ This way , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_[74-lindsey] [Lindsey]_74-lindsey directs [me]_2959-i across a huge boardroom , and [my]_2959-i heels click on the marble . Why do n’t [Lindsey]_74-lindsey ’s shoes click ? Okay , buy rubber - soled shoes tomorrow . [We]_405-we get to the end of [the huge room]_{406-the huge room} and down [another corridor]_{407-another corridor} , and [my]_2959-i heels are clicking like [I]_2959-i do n’t know what . [They]_408-they ’re even annoying [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i sound like a horse . [I]_2959-i feel like taking them off and throwing them in the trash . Just be quiet . [I]_2959-i ’m trying to appear professional here . [We]_405-we get to a set of black double doors , and [Lindsey]_74-lindsey knocks as [my]_2959-i heart pounds in [my]_2959-i chest . Just . . . do n’t say anything stupid . “ Come in , ”_[74-lindsey] a deep voice calls . [Lindsey]_74-lindsey opens the doors , and [I]_2959-i step into [the office]_{385-new york} . Familiar blue eyes rise to meet [mine]_2959-i from behind the large mahogany desk , and [I]_2959-i stop dead still . What ? “ [Emily Foster]_186-jameson , [I]_74-lindsey would like to introduce [you]_186-jameson to [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} , ”_[74-lindsey] [Lindsey]_74-lindsey says . [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_246-alan , unable to speak because there ’s no air in [my]_2959-i lungs . [His]_246-alan eyebrow rises , and [he]_246-alan sits back in [his]_246-alan chair as [he]_246-alan smirks . “ Hello , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_[246-alan] [His]_246-alan big eyes hold [mine]_2959-i , the same beautiful deep - blue eyes that hypnotized [me]_2959-i twelve months ago . It ’s [him]_246-alan . Chapter 3 Oh [[my]_2959-i God]_{2363-my god} . [He]_246-alan stands and walks around to [my]_2959-i side of the desk and holds [his]_246-alan hand out to shake [mine]_2959-i . “ [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson . ”_[246-alan] It ’s [him]_246-alan , [the layover guy who never asked for [my]_2959-i number]_246-alan . [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_246-alan as [my]_2959-i brain completely misfires . [I]_2959-i ca n’t believe this . [He]_246-alan ’s [the fucking CEO]_246-alan ? “ [Emily]_186-jameson , tell [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} all about [yourself]_186-jameson , ”_[74-lindsey] [Lindsey]_74-lindsey says , as if to prompt [me]_2959-i to speak . “ Oh . ”_[74-lindsey] [I]_2959-i catch [myself]_2959-i and shake [his]_246-alan hand . “ [I]_246-alan ’m [Emily Foster]_186-jameson . ”_[246-alan] [His]_246-alan hand is strong and warm , and [I]_2959-i ’m instantly reminded how it felt on [my]_2959-i skin . [I]_2959-i pull [my]_2959-i hand out of [his]_246-alan grip as if [he]_246-alan ’s given [me]_2959-i an electric shock . [His]_246-alan mischievous eyes hold [mine]_2959-i , and [he]_246-alan keeps [his]_246-alan face straight . “ Welcome to [Miles Media]_{14-miles media} , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan says calmly . “ Thanks , ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i croak . [I]_2959-i look over at [Lindsey]_74-lindsey . Oh God , does [she]_74-lindsey know [I]_2959-i ’m [a dirty - talking whore bag who fucked [[our]_413-our boss ’s boss ’s boss]_{414-our boss ’s boss ’s boss}]_{412-a dirty - talking whore bag who fucked our boss ’s boss ’s boss} ? “ [I]_74-lindsey ’ll take it from here , [Lindsey]_74-lindsey . [Emily]_186-jameson will be out in a moment , ”_[74-lindsey] [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} states . [Lindsey]_74-lindsey frowns and looks over at [me]_2959-i . “ [I]_74-lindsey ’ll just — ”_[74-lindsey] “ Wait outside , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan says as [he]_246-alan dismisses [her]_74-lindsey . Shit . “ Yes , [sir]_246-alan , ”_[74-lindsey] [she]_74-lindsey says as [she]_74-lindsey scurries for the door . It closes behind [her]_74-lindsey , and [I]_2959-i drag [my]_2959-i eyes back to [him]_246-alan . [He]_246-alan ’s tall , with dark hair , and [he]_246-alan ’s wearing the most perfectly fitted navy suit in the history of all suits . [His]_246-alan blue eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ Hello , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i twist [my]_2959-i fingers in front of [myself]_2959-i nervously . “ Hi . ”_[2959-i] [He]_246-alan never asked for [your]_415-your number . Screw [him]_246-alan . [I]_2959-i tilt [my]_2959-i chin to the ceiling as [I]_2959-i act brave . [I]_2959-i did n’t want [him]_246-alan to call [me]_2959-i anyway . [His]_246-alan eyes blaze , and [he]_246-alan rests [his]_246-alan behind on [his]_246-alan desk and crosses [his]_246-alan feet in front of [him]_246-alan . [I]_2959-i glance down at [his]_246-alan shoes . [I]_2959-i remember those pretentious expensive shoes . “ Given any poor unsuspecting travel companions hickeys lately ? ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan asks . Oh hell on a broomstick — [he]_246-alan remembers . [I]_2959-i feel [my]_2959-i face flush with embarrassment . [I]_2959-i ca n’t believe [I]_2959-i did that . Shit , shit , shit . “ Yes , just last night , actually . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pause for effect . “ On [my]_2959-i flight here . ”_[2959-i] [His]_246-alan jaw clenches , and [he]_246-alan raises [his]_246-alan eyebrow , unimpressed . “ So [you]_246-alan ’re not [Jim]_266-jim ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ To [some people [I]_2959-i ’m [Jim]_266-jim]_{2401-some people i ’m jim} . ”_[2959-i] “ [Women]_276-women [you]_246-alan pick up for one - night stands , [you]_246-alan mean . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan crosses [his]_246-alan arms in front of [him]_246-alan as if annoyed . “ What ’s with the attitude ? ”_[246-alan] “ [I]_2959-i do n’t have an attitude , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i fire back . [He]_246-alan raises [his]_246-alan eyebrow again , and [I]_2959-i feel like slapping it down to [his]_246-alan chin . [I]_2959-i look around [[his]_246-alan over - the - top luxurious office]_{416-his over - the - top luxurious office} . It ’s ridiculous , with a 360 - degree view out over [New York]_{385-new york} . It has [a large lounge area with a fully stocked bar and leather stools lined up in front of [it]_{417-a large lounge area with a fully stocked bar and leather stools lined up in front of it}]_{417-a large lounge area with a fully stocked bar and leather stools lined up in front of it} and a conference table area . [I]_2959-i can see [a hallway with a private bathroom]_{418-a hallway with a private bathroom} , and then [another few rooms]_{419-another few rooms} are off that . [He]_246-alan runs [his]_246-alan fingertips over [his]_246-alan bottom lip as [he]_246-alan assesses [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i feel it all the way to [my]_2959-i toes . [God]_0-aaron , [he]_246-alan ’s so gorgeous . [I]_2959-i ’ve thought of [him]_246-alan often over the last year . “ What are [you]_2403-you doing in [New York]_{385-new york} ? ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan asks . “ Working for [Miles Media]_{68-miles media} . ”_[246-alan] A thought crosses [my]_2959-i mind , and [I]_2959-i frown as [I]_2959-i remember something [he]_246-alan said to [me]_2959-i back then . Welcome to [the Miles - High Club]_{2346-the miles - high club} . . . Dear God , [I]_2959-i thought [he]_246-alan meant sex - in - a - plane club . . . [he]_246-alan meant [women who had slept with [him]_246-alan]_{421-women who had slept with him} . [Miles]_{68-miles media} . . . [he]_246-alan ’s the Miles . . . and there ’s [a club]_{422-a club} ? Damn it , the hottest sex of [my]_2959-i life was just an initiation into [some sleazy bedpost club]_{423-some sleazy bedpost club} . For the past twelve months , the night that [we]_424-we spent together was something special that [I]_2959-i held [dear]_0-aaron . [He]_246-alan awakened something inside [me]_2959-i that [I]_2959-i did n’t even know existed , and now [I]_2959-i find out that [I]_2959-i ’m one of many . [My]_2959-i heart drops in disappointment , and [I]_2959-i clench [my]_2959-i jaw to stop [myself]_2959-i from lashing out to try to hurt [him]_246-alan back . [Bastard]_84-bastard . [I]_2959-i ’ve got to get out of here before [I]_2959-i get [myself]_2959-i fired on [my]_2959-i first day . “ Nice to see [you]_84-bastard again . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i fake a smile , and with [my]_2959-i heart beating hard in [my]_2959-i chest , [I]_2959-i turn and walk out of [[his]_246-alan office]_{426-his office} and close the door behind [me]_2959-i . “ All done ? ”_[74-lindsey] [Lindsey]_74-lindsey smiles . “ Yes . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i nod . [We]_427-we walk out through reception and into [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} and begin to go back down to [my]_2959-i level . “ Do n’t feel rattled , ”_[74-lindsey] [Lindsey]_74-lindsey says softly . [I]_2959-i frown over at [her]_74-lindsey in question . “ [He]_246-alan ’s very abrasive and not good with [people]_248-people , but [his]_246-alan mind is beyond incredible . ”_[2959-i] Like [his]_246-alan dick . “ Oh , okay , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reply as [I]_2959-i stare at the ground . “ Good to know . ”_[2959-i] “ Did [he]_246-alan say anything to [you]_246-alan ? ”_[2959-i] “ No , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i lie . “ Just polite chitchat . ”_[74-lindsey] [She]_74-lindsey smiles . “ [You]_246-alan should feel very privileged . [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson does n’t make polite chitchat with [anyone]_272-anyone . ”_[74-lindsey] “ Oh . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . The door opens , and [I]_2959-i scurry out to evade this conversation . “ Thank [you]_246-alan so much for showing [me]_2959-i around . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_246-alan ’re welcome , and if [you]_246-alan have any human resource issues , please call [me]_74-lindsey immediately . ”_[74-lindsey] “ [I]_2959-i will . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shake [her]_74-lindsey hand . Does being initiated into the Miles dick - riding club classify as a human resource issue ? “ Thank [you]_246-alan so much . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i take off in the direction of [my]_2959-i desk , and [I]_2959-i discreetly grab [my]_2959-i phone from [my]_2959-i drawer . “ Back in a moment . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i head to [the bathroom]_{300-the bathroom} and bang the stall door open and lock it . Then in the privacy of [the bathroom]_{300-the bathroom} , [I]_2959-i type into Google : [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i close [my]_2959-i eyes as [I]_2959-i wait for the information to load . [My]_2959-i heart is hammering in [my]_2959-i chest . Please do n’t be married . . . please do n’t be married . [I]_2959-i ’ve beat [myself]_2959-i up over this for the last year , and it ’s played on [my]_2959-i mind as to why [he]_430-he did n’t even pretend to want [my]_2959-i number . [I]_2959-i felt like [we]_431-we had a connection , but there was something [he]_430-he did n’t tell [me]_2959-i . And for some reason , afterward , [I]_2959-i got the feeling [he]_430-he was married . . . or in a relationship . And that makes [me]_2959-i a dirty ho . [I]_2959-i ’ve never been with [a person who is in a committed relationship to [someone else]_{433-someone else}]_{432-a person who is in a committed relationship to someone else} , and [women who knowingly do that make [me]_2959-i sick]_{434-women who knowingly do that make me sick} . If [I]_2959-i had known how much it was going to play on [my]_2959-i mind , [I]_2959-i would n’t have gone near [him]_430-he that night . [Jameson Grant Miles]_186-jameson is [an American businessman]_186-jameson and [investor]_435-investor . Aged 37 , [Miles]_186-jameson is [the eldest son of media mogul [George Miles Jr.]_{85-george miles jr.} and [the grandson of [George Miles Sr]_0-aaron]_186-jameson]_186-jameson . In 2012 , [he]_186-jameson inherited control of [the family empire]_{436-the family empire} , [Miles Media Holdings Ltd.]_{15-miles media holdings ltd.} , as well as investments in television , film , and multiple other companies . [He]_186-jameson is [the former executive chairman of [Publishing and Consolidated Media Holdings , which predominantly owns media interests across a range of platforms]_{437-publishing and consolidated media holdings , which predominantly owns media interests across a range of platforms}]_186-jameson , and also [a former executive chairman of [Netflix]_87-netflix]_{438-a former executive chairman of netflix} . In May 2018 , [Miles]_0-aaron ’s net worth was assessed as $ 5.50 billion , ranking [him]_186-jameson among the top 100 richest Americans , alongside [[his]_186-jameson three brothers]_{2390-his brothers} . Oh hell . [I]_2959-i read on . Personal life . [Fiercely]_88-fiercely private , [he]_88-fiercely is known for a penchant for [beautiful women]_{440-beautiful women} . [He]_88-fiercely dated [Claudia Mason]_57-claudia from 2011 to 2015 and has had no known personal relationships since . [I]_2959-i put [my]_2959-i hand on [my]_2959-i chest and breathe out in relief . Thank God . [I]_2959-i click on the link for [Claudia Mason]_57-claudia . Who is [she]_57-claudia ? A barrage of images comes up , and [I]_2959-i feel [my]_2959-i confidence run down the drain . [Claudia Mason]_57-claudia is [an English businesswoman and fashion icon]_57-claudia . Aged 34 . [Mason]_57-claudia is [a British journalist]_57-claudia . [She]_57-claudia is the editor - in - chief of the British edition of Vogue and also the youngest editor in the history of British Vogue . [She]_57-claudia took the helm of Vogue in 2014 . [Mason]_57-claudia is one of [the country]_{2320-the country} ’s most oft - quoted voices on fashion trends . In addition to [her]_57-claudia work with [Vogue]_90-vogue , [Mason]_57-claudia has written columns for [Miles Media]_{68-miles media} and has ten published books . Personal life . [Mason]_57-claudia is [the eldest of [five children]_{443-five children}]_{442-the eldest of five children} and is [the daughter of [French politician [Marcel Angelo]_{91-marcel angelo}]_{444-french politician marcel angelo}]_{442-the eldest of five children} . [She]_57-claudia dated and was engaged to media heir [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson from 2011 to 2015 , but the relationship broke down and ended , which [she]_57-claudia cited was due to [their]_445-their individual workloads and commitments on different sides of [the world]_{249-the world} . [She]_57-claudia is currently dating [Edward Schneider]_{92-edward schneider} , [a solicitor who resides in [London]_6-london]_{447-a solicitor who resides in london} . Engaged . . . [they]_448-they were engaged ? [I]_2959-i exhale heavily and click out of [my]_2959-i search in disgust . Of course [he]_{447-a solicitor who resides in london} dated [her]_57-claudia . Well , that ’s depressing . [She]_57-claudia ’s [the damn editor of British Vogue]_{449-the damn editor of british vogue} . [I]_2959-i ca n’t compete with that shit . It took [me]_2959-i three whole years to get a crappy job at [Miles Media]_{14-miles media} . [I]_2959-i wash [my]_2959-i hands and fix [my]_2959-i hair in the mirror . Not that it matters anyway , [I]_2959-i guess . [I]_2959-i have [a boyfriend]_{450-a boyfriend} , and [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson is nothing to [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i storm back to [my]_2959-i desk with a fire in [my]_2959-i belly . [I]_2959-i wo n’t even see [him]_{447-a solicitor who resides in london} . [I]_2959-i fall into [my]_2959-i seat . “ How was the tour ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron asks . “ Yeah , good . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile as [I]_2959-i open [my]_2959-i email . “ Did [you]_93-jeez go up to the top levels ? ”_[2959-i] “ Uh - huh . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i begin to glance through [my]_2959-i five thousand emails that arrived in the two hours since [I]_2959-i left . [Jeez]_93-jeez , there ’s a lot of news around [here]_{385-new york} . “ What about [the offices]_{2406-the management offices} ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron replies . “ [They]_{2406-the management offices} ’re something else , right ? All that white marble . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i lips as [I]_2959-i try to act casual . “ Uh - huh . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_198-molly did n’t get to see [the management offices]_{2406-the management offices} when [I]_198-molly started , ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly says . “ [He]_0-aaron was n’t taking [visitors]_{2398-visitors} that day . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i glance over at [her]_198-molly . “ [I]_0-aaron went into [[his]_0-aaron office]_{426-his office} , but [he]_0-aaron was n’t there , ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron chimes in . “ Who ? [Jameson]_186-jameson , [you]_0-aaron mean ? ”_[0-aaron] [I]_2959-i pretend to be uninterested in this conversation . “ Yeah , did [you]_0-aaron see [him]_0-aaron at all ? ”_[2959-i] “ Yep . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i open an email . “ [I]_2959-i met [him]_0-aaron . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i fucked [his]_0-aaron brains out too . “ Was [he]_0-aaron a rude pig ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly frowns . “ [Everyone]_{2304-everyone} is so scared of [him]_0-aaron . ”_[198-molly] “ No , [he]_0-aaron seemed fine . [I]_0-aaron was in [[his]_0-aaron office]_2369-there , and [he]_0-aaron seemed okay . ”_[0-aaron] “ [You]_0-aaron were in [[his]_0-aaron office]_2369-there while [he]_0-aaron was [there]_2369-there ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron frowns . “ Uh - huh . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i keep typing . Please stop talking about [him]_0-aaron . “ What are [you]_0-aaron guys doing tonight ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly asks . “ [The kids]_{452-the kids} are with [[their]_{452-the kids} dad]_{2411-their dad} , and [I]_198-molly could do with pizza and beer . Screw the diet and [the gym]_{2412-the gym} . ”_[198-molly] “ Yeah , [I]_0-aaron ’m in , ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron replies . “ Really ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . [I]_2959-i ca n’t believe [they]_{452-the kids} are asking [me]_2959-i out on [my]_2959-i first day . “ Yeah , why not ? Do [you]_0-aaron have anything else going on ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly asks . “ Well , seeing as [[you]_0-aaron two]_{2413-you two} are [the only people [I]_2959-i know in [New York]_{385-new york}]_{2413-you two} , what else could [I]_2959-i possibly have going on ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug happily . “ Pizza and beer it is , ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly replies as [she]_198-molly continues typing . [I]_2959-i begin to scroll back through [my]_2959-i email list , and the name [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson pops up as [a sender]_{453-a sender} . What ? [I]_2959-i glance around guiltily and click to open it . It ’s probably a welcome email sent to [everyone]_{2304-everyone} . [Emily]_186-jameson , [You]_186-jameson are required in [[my]_2959-i office]_{455-my office} at 8:00 a.m. tomorrow for a private meeting . Go through security and tell [them]_{2304-everyone} [you]_186-jameson are coming to see [me]_2959-i . [They]_{2304-everyone} will buzz [you]_186-jameson up to [my]_2959-i floor . [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson CEO Miles Media [New York]_{385-new york} “ What the hell ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ What ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly asks . “ Nothing , ”_[198-molly] [I]_2959-i stammer as [I]_2959-i minimize [my]_2959-i screen . Shit . What does [he]_186-jameson want ? Just play dumb . [I]_2959-i write back . [Dear Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} , Would [you]_{79-mr. miles} like [me]_2959-i to bring [[my]_2959-i team]_{456-my team} ? [Emily]_186-jameson [I]_2959-i tap [my]_2959-i pen on the desk and look around nervously as [I]_2959-i wait for [his]_186-jameson reply . [Emily]_186-jameson , No . [I]_2959-i do not want to see [[your]_{79-mr. miles} team]_{456-my team} , nor do [I]_2959-i want [you]_{79-mr. miles} to tell [anybody]_457-anybody about [our]_458-our scheduled meeting . This particular meeting is of a private nature . Jameson Miles Miles Media [New York]_{385-new york} [My]_2959-i eyes widen . Oh [my]_2959-i God . . . private nature ? What the hell does that mean ? [I]_2959-i pinch the bridge of [my]_2959-i nose . [I]_2959-i need pizza and beer too . Hurry up , five o’clock . [The bar]_{459-the bar} is noisy and a hive of activity , and [I]_2959-i can hardly wipe the goofy grin from [my]_2959-i face as [I]_2959-i look around at [all the people who have just come from work]_{460-all the people who have just come from work} . [I]_2959-i ’m sitting at a bench table with [Molly]_198-molly and [Aaron]_0-aaron in [a sports bar]_{461-a sports bar} , and [I]_2959-i ’m feeling oh so [New York]_{385-new york} . It ’s a Monday night , and [I]_2959-i ’m out and about with what feels like [a million cool people]_{462-a million cool people} . “ All [I]_198-molly ’m saying , ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly says as [she]_198-molly chews [her]_198-molly pizza , “ is that if [you]_2414-you did n’t see [him]_{464-aaron ’s new boyfriend} all weekend , and [he]_{464-aaron ’s new boyfriend} has no problem with that , there ’s an issue . ”_[198-molly] “ Maybe [he]_{464-aaron ’s new boyfriend} was just busy , ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron scoffs . “ Maybe [he]_{464-aaron ’s new boyfriend} ’s just lame , ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly huffs . [We]_463-we ’re discussing [[Aaron]_0-aaron ’s new boyfriend]_{464-aaron ’s new boyfriend} , and for some reason , [I]_2959-i feel comfortable enough to make [Aaron]_0-aaron feel better about [his]_0-aaron situation because [mine]_465-mine is worse . “ Well , get this . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i finish [my]_2959-i mouthful . “ [You]_2414-you want to hear lame ? [I]_2959-i ’m dating [a guy [I]_2959-i ’ve crushed on since [I]_2959-i was thirteen years old]_{2415-a guy i ’ve crushed on since i was thirteen years old} . [A football star who was only interested in [me]_2959-i after [he]_{2415-a guy i ’ve crushed on since i was thirteen years old} injured [himself]_{2415-a guy i ’ve crushed on since i was thirteen years old}]_{2415-a guy i ’ve crushed on since i was thirteen years old} . [We]_463-we had a few great months together , but then [he]_{2415-a guy i ’ve crushed on since i was thirteen years old} dove into some kind of life crisis . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i beer . “ [He]_{2415-a guy i ’ve crushed on since i was thirteen years old} does n’t know what [he]_{2415-a guy i ’ve crushed on since i was thirteen years old} wants to do outside of football . [He]_{2415-a guy i ’ve crushed on since i was thirteen years old} ’s unemployed with no prospects . [He]_{2415-a guy i ’ve crushed on since i was thirteen years old} lives in [[[his]_{2415-a guy i ’ve crushed on since i was thirteen years old} parents]_{2353-his parents} ’ garage]_{2354-his parents ’ garage} and just recently wrote [[his]_{2415-a guy i ’ve crushed on since i was thirteen years old} car]_{2354-his parents ’ garage} off . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shake [my]_2959-i head in disgust and pull [my]_2959-i phone out of [my]_2959-i bag . “ [He]_{2415-a guy i ’ve crushed on since i was thirteen years old} would n’t move here with [me]_2959-i because [he]_{2415-a guy i ’ve crushed on since i was thirteen years old} does n’t like [busy cities]_{2418-busy cities} . [He]_{2415-a guy i ’ve crushed on since i was thirteen years old} did n’t call [me]_2959-i this morning to wish [me]_2959-i luck , and it ’s now”—I_[2959-i] glance at [my]_2959-i watch—“nine forty p.m. , and [he]_{2415-a guy i ’ve crushed on since i was thirteen years old} has n’t even bothered to call to see how [my]_466-they first day went . ”_[466-they] [They]_466-they both groan in disgust . “ What the fuck are [you]_466-they doing with [him]_{2415-a guy i ’ve crushed on since i was thirteen years old} ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron winces . [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i beer with an eye roll and shrug . “ Who knows ? ”_[466-they] [They]_466-they both chuckle . “ Well , all [I]_198-molly want is some good sex . ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly sighs . “ Every time [I]_2959-i see someone [I]_2959-i ’m attracted to , [I]_2959-i ’m with [the kids]_{452-the kids} . So then [I]_2959-i ca n’t act on it . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ [You]_466-they would n’t introduce [anyone]_272-anyone to [[your]_466-they kids]_{452-the kids} ? ”_[2959-i] “ No . [[My]_0-aaron God]_{2363-my god} , [they]_{452-the kids} make [[their]_{452-the kids} father]_{2422-their father} ’s life hell with [[his]_0-aaron new girlfriend]_{250-his new girlfriend} . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron laughs as if remembering something . “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . [Molly]_198-molly smirks . “ [[My]_2959-i children]_{452-the kids} are so fucking naughty [you]_{452-the kids} would n’t even believe . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i giggle . “ How old are [they]_{452-the kids} ? ”_[2959-i] “ [Mischa]_94-mischa is thirteen , and [Brad]_95-brad is fifteen , ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly replies . “ [They]_{452-the kids} ’ve decided between [the two of [them]_{452-the kids}]_{452-the kids} that [they]_{452-the kids} are going to make life a living hell for [[their]_{452-the kids} father]_{2422-their father} and [me]_198-molly unless [we]_2424-we get back together . ”_[198-molly] “ How so ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i laugh . “ [Brad]_95-brad has been suspended from school twice this year , and now [Mischa]_94-mischa is going off [the rails]_{2425-the rails} too . A few weekends ago [they]_{452-the kids} each had [a friend]_{2426-his girlfriend} stay over at [[their]_{452-the kids} father]_{2422-their father} ’s while [he]_{2426-his girlfriend} and [[his]_{2426-his girlfriend} girlfriend]_{2426-his girlfriend} went out to dinner . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown as [I]_2959-i listen . “ [They]_{452-the kids} got drunk from [[his]_{2426-his girlfriend} bar]_{2427-his bar} and cut the crotches out of all of [[his]_{2426-his girlfriend} girlfriend]_{2426-his girlfriend} ’s underwear . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron laughs , and [my]_2959-i eyes widen in horror . “ [And”—she]_{96-and”—she[467-she]} sips [her]_467-she drink—“when [[their]_{452-the kids} father]_{2422-their father} asked [them]_{452-the kids} about it , [they]_{452-the kids} said that the underpants had rotted because [her]_467-she vagina was contaminated . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i burst out laughing . “ No . ”_[467-she] [She]_467-she shakes [her]_467-she head in disgust . “ [I]_467-she wish [I]_467-she was joking . ”_[467-she] [Aaron]_0-aaron throws [his]_0-aaron head back and laughs . “ [I]_0-aaron fucking love [[your]_0-aaron kids]_{2419-the two of them} , [man]_2430-tristan . That ’s a classic . ”_[0-aaron] “ No , it ’s a nightmare , ”_[467-she] [she]_467-she replies flatly . “ Why did [you]_0-aaron divorce [him]_2430-tristan ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ [You]_0-aaron know , [I]_467-she do n’t actually know . ”_[467-she] [She]_467-she thinks for a moment . “ [We]_2431-we just kind of lost [our]_2431-we way . [We]_2431-we were both working so hard , so [we]_2431-we were always too tired for sex . [We]_2431-we had [two kids]_{2432-two kids} and a mortgage . ”_[467-she] [She]_467-she shrugs . “ [We]_2431-we never went on date nights or made an effort for each other . [I]_467-she do n’t have a precise moment that [we]_2431-we knew it was over . [We]_2431-we just kind of fell apart . ”_[467-she] “ That ’s sad . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sigh . “ [He]_2430-tristan met [someone else at work]_{2433-someone else at work} , and [he]_2430-tristan talked to [me]_2959-i about it . Nothing had happened at that stage , and [he]_2430-tristan said [he]_2430-tristan told [me]_2959-i because [he]_2430-tristan wanted to fight for [us]_2431-we to get back what [we]_2431-we once had . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_2434-you did n’t fight ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ No , ”_[467-she] [she]_467-she says sadly . “ And neither did [he]_2430-tristan . [We]_2431-we just kind of walked away from each other . It was all too hard at the time . ”_[467-she] [She]_467-she thinks for a moment . “ [I]_467-she regret it now . [He]_2430-tristan ’s [a great man]_2430-tristan . And in hindsight , [I]_467-she think a lot of the problems [we]_{468-great friends} had just come from getting older . Sex drive is something [you]_2434-you both need to work at , but [we]_{468-great friends} did n’t realize that until it was too late . ”_[467-she] [She]_467-she smiles softly . “ [We]_{468-great friends} ’re [great friends]_{468-great friends} now . ”_[467-she] Hmm . [We]_{468-great friends} all fall silent . “ Lucky [you]_2434-you ’ve got [those kids]_{2435-those kids} to cut up [your]_2434-you competition ’s underwear . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron smiles . [We]_{468-great friends} all laugh out loud . “ [Contaminated vagina]_{97-contaminated vagina} . Where do [they]_{2435-those kids} come up with this shit ? ”_{[468-great friends]} [I]_2959-i hold the black dress up against [my]_2959-i body and stare at [my]_2959-i reflection in the mirror . Hmm . [I]_2959-i throw it and the coat hanger it ’s on onto the bed . [I]_2959-i grab the gray skirt and jacket and hold it up to [myself]_2959-i . Maybe black ? Shit . What the hell do [you]_469-you wear when [you]_469-you want to be sexy without trying to look sexy ? It ’s just now eleven o’clock , and [I]_2959-i ’m deciding what to wear to [my]_2959-i meeting with [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} in the morning . What does [he]_{79-mr. miles} want to see [me]_2959-i about anyway ? [I]_2959-i think [I]_2959-i ’ll go with the black dress . [I]_2959-i lay it out on the chair . [I]_2959-i pick up [my]_2959-i patent leather pumps and put them on the floor under the dress . What earrings ? Hmm . [I]_2959-i twist [my]_2959-i lips as [I]_2959-i think . Pearls . Yes , pearls do n’t scream fuck [me]_2959-i like the gold ones do . Pearls are sensible working earrings . Right . [I]_2959-i ’ll wash [my]_2959-i hair and curl it in the morning . [I]_2959-i look at [my]_2959-i reflection and hold [my]_2959-i hair up in a high ponytail . Yes . . . high ponytail . [He]_{79-mr. miles} likes high ponytails . Stop it . [I]_2959-i sit on the end of [my]_2959-i bed and look around [[my]_2959-i little apartment]_{470-my little apartment} . It ’s one bedroom and on the thirtieth floor — tiny and quaint . It is modern , though , and is in [a nice building]_{471-a nice building} . It ’s different from what [I]_2959-i ’m used to ; this [New York]_{385-new york} – living thing is all so foreign , living alone and drinks and places to go on a Monday night . [I]_2959-i pick up [my]_2959-i phone and flick through [my]_2959-i messages . [[My]_2959-i three best girlfriends]_{472-my three best girlfriends} all messaged [me]_2959-i tonight to see how [my]_2959-i day was . So did [[my]_2959-i mom]_{473-my mom} . [Robbie]_56-robbie did n’t . Sadness sweeps over [me]_2959-i . What ’s going on with [us]_474-us ? Maybe [I]_2959-i should call [him]_56-robbie . [I]_2959-i am the one who left , after all . [I]_2959-i dial [his]_56-robbie number , and it rings . Eventually , [he]_56-robbie picks up . “ Hey . ”_[56-robbie] “ Hi . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . “ How are [you]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] “ Sleeping , ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie mutters . “ What time is it ? ”_[56-robbie] [My]_2959-i face falls as [I]_2959-i glance at [my]_2959-i watch . “ Sorry . ”_[56-robbie] “ Yeah , no matter . [I]_2959-i ’ll call [you]_2959-i tomorrow , [babe]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i heart drops . “ Okay . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pause . “ Sorry to wake [you]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] “ Bye . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie hangs up . [I]_2959-i exhale heavily . “ [My]_2959-i first day at work went great ; thank [you]_2959-i for asking , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i mutter dryly . With a heavy heart and a stomach full of nerves , [I]_2959-i crawl into bed , and [I]_2959-i smile into the darkness as [I]_2959-i remember [my]_2959-i night with [Jim]_266-jim . [I]_2959-i ’ve thought of [him]_266-jim many times when [I]_2959-i ’m alone at night . [He]_266-jim was hands down the most amazing sexual experience of [my]_2959-i life — not that [I]_2959-i ’ll ever admit that to [anyone]_272-anyone , but [I]_2959-i know it [myself]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i ’m going to see [him]_266-jim in the morning . [I]_2959-i feel the nerves dance in [my]_2959-i stomach . [I]_2959-i wonder what [he]_266-jim ’s going to say ? [Jameson]_186-jameson [I]_2959-i sit at [my]_2959-i desk and go through the folder , [Emily Foster]_186-jameson ’s file . [I]_2959-i read through [her]_186-jameson details , school grades , references , and then [her]_186-jameson application letter . Was this the job [she]_186-jameson was trying to interview for twelve months ago ? Buzz . [I]_2959-i press the intercom to security on the ground floor , and [I]_2959-i glance up at the mirror on the wall and push the remote . It instantly turns into a television screen . “ Yes . ”_[2959-i] “ [We]_2436-we have an [Emily Foster]_186-jameson here to see [you]_186-jameson , [sir]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i catch sight of [her]_186-jameson , and [I]_2959-i smile . There [she]_186-jameson is . “ Send [her]_186-jameson up . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i watch as [she]_186-jameson is led through to [the elevator]_{455-my office} with [the guard]_{477-the guard} , and [he]_{477-the guard} puts [her]_186-jameson into [[my]_2959-i elevator]_{455-my office} . [I]_2959-i make [my]_2959-i way out into reception , and soon the doors open , and [she]_186-jameson comes into view . “ Hello . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i smirk . “ Hi , ”_{[186-jameson]} [she]_186-jameson whispers . [She]_186-jameson looks nervous . [I]_2959-i hold out [my]_2959-i hand and gesture toward [[my]_2959-i office]_{455-my office} . “ Please come through . ”_{[186-jameson]} [She]_186-jameson walks in front of [me]_2959-i , and [my]_2959-i eyes drop to [her]_186-jameson backside . [She]_186-jameson ’s wearing a black fitted dress , sheer stockings , and high - heeled pumps , and [her]_186-jameson hair is in a bouncy ponytail . . . just ready to drag down to [my]_2959-i . . . stop it . “ Take a seat , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say as [I]_2959-i sit down at [my]_2959-i desk . [She]_186-jameson takes a seat and clutches [her]_186-jameson bag on [her]_186-jameson lap as [her]_186-jameson eyes find [mine]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i swivel on [my]_2959-i chair as [I]_2959-i watch [her]_186-jameson . [She]_186-jameson ’s as gorgeous as [I]_2959-i remember , and a potent sexual aura oozes out of [her]_186-jameson like a concealed weapon . Long dark hair , brown eyes , and big fuckable lips . [I]_2959-i ’ve thought of [her]_186-jameson often — [she]_186-jameson was impossible to forget . [Nobody]_2321-nobody has ever ridden [my]_2959-i cock the way [she]_186-jameson did , not before , not since . Not ever . The hickey on [my]_2959-i neck was n’t the only thing [she]_186-jameson branded [me]_2959-i with that night . “ [You]_186-jameson wanted to see [me]_186-jameson ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [she]_186-jameson asks softly . The sound of [her]_186-jameson voice has a physical effect on [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i remember [her]_186-jameson sex talk and what a turn - on it was to hear [her]_186-jameson sweet voice say such dirty things . “ Yes . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i stare at [her]_186-jameson . “ [I]_186-jameson did . ”_{[186-jameson]} [Emily]_186-jameson was [the first woman [I]_2959-i have been with in a long time who had no idea who [I]_2959-i was]_186-jameson . Strangely enough , [I]_2959-i did n’t need to be [anyone]_272-anyone that night . Being [Jim]_266-jim was enough . “ What about ? ”_[266-jim] [I]_2959-i sit back in [my]_2959-i chair , annoyed with [her]_186-jameson attitude . [The majority of women gush over [me]_2959-i]_{480-the majority of women gush over me} — this one , not so much . “ What are [you]_186-jameson doing in [New York]_{385-new york} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask [her]_186-jameson to try to make polite conversation . “ [You]_186-jameson asked [me]_186-jameson that yesterday , ”_{[186-jameson]} [she]_186-jameson snaps . “ Get to the point . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [I]_186-jameson am asking [you]_186-jameson again now . Stop with the fucking attitude . ”_{[186-jameson]} [She]_186-jameson narrows [her]_186-jameson eyes as if annoyed . [I]_2959-i sit forward in [my]_2959-i seat . “ What is [your]_186-jameson problem ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sneer . “ [You]_186-jameson . [You]_186-jameson are [my]_2959-i problem . ”_[2959-i] “ [Me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask , affronted . “ What did [I]_2959-i do ? ”_[2959-i] “ Do [you]_186-jameson have something work related to talk to [me]_2959-i about or not , [Jim]_266-jim ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i glare at [her]_186-jameson . “ [You]_186-jameson ’re very rude . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_186-jameson ’re very rich . ”_[2959-i] “ And ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [She]_186-jameson shrugs . “ What does that mean ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . “ Nothing . ”_{[186-jameson]} [She]_186-jameson straightens [her]_186-jameson back . “ If [you]_186-jameson do n’t have anything work related to talk to [me]_186-jameson about , [I]_186-jameson ’ll get going . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i clench [my]_2959-i jaw as [I]_2959-i stare at [her]_186-jameson ; the air crackles between [us]_481-us . “ Can [I]_186-jameson see [you]_186-jameson tonight ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [Her]_186-jameson eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ No . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Why not ? ”_[2959-i] “ Because [I]_2959-i ’m [a professional]_{2437-a professional} , and [I]_2959-i have no intention of mixing business and pleasure . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i clench [my]_2959-i jaw to stop [myself]_2959-i from smirking . [My]_2959-i interest in [her]_186-jameson is growing by the second . “ What makes [you]_186-jameson so sure it would be a pleasure ? ”_[2959-i] “ History has a way of repeating itself , ”_{[186-jameson]} [she]_186-jameson whispers as [her]_186-jameson dark eyes drop to [my]_2959-i lips . [I]_2959-i get a vision of [her]_186-jameson naked and on top of [me]_2959-i in [my]_2959-i chair , and [I]_2959-i inhale sharply as [my]_2959-i cock begins to thump . “ History will be kind to [me]_2959-i , for [I]_2959-i intend to write it , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say . “ Quoting [Winston Churchill]_{98-winston churchill} now , [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [she]_186-jameson breathes . [I]_2959-i smirk , amused by [her]_186-jameson intelligence . “ [You]_186-jameson must look at the facts because [they]_2438-they look at [you]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_186-jameson never worry about action , but only inaction , ”_{[186-jameson]} [she]_186-jameson fires back without hesitation . “ Exactly , so as [a fellow Churchill tragic]_{2439-a fellow churchill tragic} , [I]_186-jameson demand [you]_186-jameson have dinner with [me]_186-jameson tonight . ”_{[186-jameson]} [She]_186-jameson smiles and stands . “ [I]_186-jameson ca n’t . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Why not ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_186-jameson ’m washing [my]_186-jameson hair . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Why would [you]_186-jameson want to wash it when [you]_186-jameson could be getting it dirty ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [She]_186-jameson shrugs casually . “ [I]_2959-i ’m just not interested in [you]_186-jameson . [You]_186-jameson ’re not [my]_2959-i type . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stare at [her]_186-jameson as [her]_186-jameson words roll around in [my]_2959-i head . [Ouch]_99-ouch . [I]_2959-i purse [my]_2959-i lips as [my]_2959-i eyes hold [hers]_186-jameson . That ’s the first time [I]_2959-i ’ve ever been flat - out rejected . “ Very well ; [your]_186-jameson loss . ”_[2959-i] “ Maybe . ”_{[186-jameson]} [She]_186-jameson turns to leave . “ Nice to see [you]_186-jameson again , though . [You]_186-jameson must be very proud of [your]_186-jameson achievements . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i rise and open the door in a rush . [She]_186-jameson looks up at [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i clench [my]_2959-i hand at [my]_2959-i side to stop [myself]_2959-i from touching [her]_186-jameson . “ Goodbye , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] “ Goodbye , ”_{[186-jameson]} [she]_186-jameson breathes as the air swirls between [us]_482-us . “ Thanks for giving [me]_186-jameson a job . ”_{[186-jameson]} [She]_186-jameson smiles . [I]_2959-i nod once . It ’s not the only job [I]_2959-i have for [you]_483-you . [She]_186-jameson turns and walks out and into [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} , and [I]_2959-i slam the door and storm back into [[my]_2959-i office]_{385-new york} . [I]_2959-i ’m not [her]_186-jameson type . . . since when ? [I]_2959-i hold the remote up to the security television screen and turn it back on . “ Get [me]_2959-i [the fortieth floor]_{2440-the fortieth floor} , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask the voice control . It flickers , and then a picture comes up with the fortieth floor . [I]_2959-i watch as [she]_186-jameson steps out of [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} . “ Follow [her]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} The camera follows [her]_186-jameson as [she]_186-jameson walks up [the aisle]_{388-the aisle} and then to [her]_186-jameson seat at [her]_186-jameson desk . “ Camera above [that area]_{385-new york} , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i command . The screen flickers , and [she]_186-jameson comes into view . [The office]_{385-new york} is empty , and [she]_186-jameson takes out [her]_186-jameson phone and begins to scroll . [She]_186-jameson crosses [her]_186-jameson legs , and [I]_2959-i sit forward as [her]_186-jameson thigh becomes visible through the split . [I]_2959-i watch [her]_186-jameson as arousal swirls between [my]_2959-i legs . So . . . fucking hot . [She]_186-jameson ’s looking something up . “ Zoom in , ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i command . The camera zooms in , and [I]_2959-i squint as [I]_2959-i try to read what [she]_186-jameson ’s googling . [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i sit back and smile . [Bingo]_100-bingo . Chapter 4 [Emily]_186-jameson “ What about [this one]_100-bingo ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron smiles . “ [Hot firefighter]_{2441-hot firefighter} rescues kitten from a drain . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug . “ [I]_0-aaron ’ll do that story for sure . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron smirks . “ [Me]_0-aaron too . ”_[0-aaron] “ What are [you]_0-aaron guys doing over the weekend ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly asks as [she]_198-molly works . “ Nothing , ”_[198-molly] [Aaron]_0-aaron replies . “ Hopefully seeing [Paul]_101-paul . ”_[0-aaron] “ [Me]_2959-i neither . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sigh . [Molly]_198-molly looks up . “ [I]_2959-i thought [you]_0-aaron were going [home]_2289-home to see [[your]_0-aaron boyfriend]_{2443-your boyfriend} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug . “ Well , [I]_2959-i was supposed to , but [I]_2959-i ’ve spoken to [him]_{2443-your boyfriend} for four minutes in total in ten days , and [he]_{2443-your boyfriend} has n’t called [me]_2959-i once . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i swivel on [my]_2959-i chair as [I]_2959-i consider [my]_2959-i depressing situation . “ [God]_0-aaron , [you]_0-aaron need to dump [him]_{2443-your boyfriend} and move on to [Ricardo]_246-alan . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes . [Ricardo]_246-alan works on this floor , and for the last few days [he]_246-alan ’s been loitering around [my]_2959-i desk and making idle chitchat . “ [He]_246-alan ’s into [you]_0-aaron , ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly mutters . “ [He]_246-alan ’s hanging around [your]_0-aaron desk like a fly . ”_[198-molly] “ It ’s a shame . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smirk as [I]_2959-i watch [him]_246-alan talk to [someone]_2326-someone at [their]_2326-someone desk . “ [He]_246-alan ’s actually very good looking . ”_[246-alan] [Ricardo]_246-alan ’s Italian and has the whole tall , dark , and handsome thing perfected to a tee . Unfortunately , [his]_246-alan personality is n’t half as pretty as [his]_246-alan face . [He]_246-alan ’s either making fun of [someone]_2326-someone or talking about [himself]_246-alan in [the third person]_{489-the third person} . “ [Yuck]_103-yuck . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron widens [his]_0-aaron eyes in disgust . “ What would [you]_0-aaron even talk to [him]_0-aaron about ? ”_[0-aaron] “ [You]_0-aaron would n’t talk to [him]_0-aaron — [you’d]_2444-you’d stick a ball gag in and fuck [him]_0-aaron stupid , ”_[77-ava] [Ava]_77-ava says as [she]_77-ava watches [him]_0-aaron . “ [I]_77-ava bet [he]_0-aaron ’s hung like a horse , ”_[77-ava] [she]_77-ava whispers . [We]_490-we all burst out laughing . “ What are [you]_0-aaron doing this weekend ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask [Ava]_77-ava . “ [She]_77-ava ’ll be chasing [rich boys]_{2445-rich boys} , ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron says . “ Damn right . ”_[0-aaron] [My]_2959-i eyes flick to [her]_77-ava . “ What does that even mean ? ”_[0-aaron] “ [I]_0-aaron hang out at clubs where [the men]_{378-the men} have money . ”_[0-aaron] “ Why ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ [I]_2959-i am not ending up with a broke loser . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i mouth falls open in horror . “ So . . . [you]_2959-i would marry [a guy just for money]_{2447-a guy just for money} ? ”_[2959-i] “ No . ”_[77-ava] [She]_77-ava shrugs . “ Maybe . ”_[77-ava] [She]_77-ava looks up . “ Oh no , here [he]_266-jim comes , ”_[77-ava] [she]_77-ava whispers . [Ricardo]_246-alan comes over and sits on the corner of [my]_2959-i desk . [The floor manager]_266-jim has gone [home]_2289-home for the day , so [he]_266-jim ’s not even bothering to pretend to work anymore . “ Hey there . ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim smiles . “ Hi , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reply flatly . Please go away — you’re embarrassing . “ [Ricardo]_246-alan wanted to come and check on [his]_246-alan favorite coworker . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stare at the stupid human being in front of [me]_2959-i . “ Why do [you]_2959-i speak about [yourself]_2959-i in [the third person]_{489-the third person} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . [Aaron]_0-aaron snickers as [he]_266-jim pretends not to listen . “ [Ricardo]_246-alan wonders why [you]_2959-i never come to [his]_246-alan desk to see [him]_246-alan . ”_[266-jim] “ [Emily]_186-jameson likes to get [her]_186-jameson work done , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i mutter flatly . “ Oh . ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim laughs as [he]_266-jim points at [me]_2959-i . “ [Ricardo]_246-alan likes [your]_2959-i style , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i begin to work , and [he]_266-jim stays sitting on the corner of [my]_2959-i desk while [he]_266-jim rambles , hardly coming up for air . Every now and then the four of [us]_493-us exchange looks , unable to believe what a tool [this guy]_266-jim is . From the corner of [my]_2959-i eye [I]_2959-i see the elevator doors open , and then [I]_2959-i see [somebody]_251-somebody run back to [their]_251-somebody workstation . Huh ? [I]_2959-i look up to see [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson striding down [the carpeted corridor]_{495-the carpeted corridor} toward [my]_2959-i desk . [His]_266-jim jaw is clenched , and [he]_266-jim is glaring at [Ricardo]_246-alan . [People]_248-people are standing up in [their]_248-people cubicles to see who it is , and when [they]_248-people see [him]_266-jim , [they]_248-people immediately drop into [their]_248-people chairs in fear . What the hell is [he]_266-jim doing here ? [I]_2959-i watch in slow motion as [he]_266-jim comes to a halt in front of [my]_2959-i desk . [Ricardo]_246-alan glances over and then nearly swallows [his]_246-alan tongue and stands immediately . “ [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan stammers . “ Hello , [sir]_246-alan . ”_[246-alan] “ What are [you]_246-alan doing ? ”_{[79-mr. miles]} [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} growls . “ [I]_246-alan was training [[our]_2449-our new employee]_{2450-our new employee} , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan splutters . “ This is [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan says , introducing [me]_2959-i . [Aaron]_0-aaron ’s eyes meet [mine]_2959-i in horror . “ [I]_246-alan am well aware of who [Emily Foster]_186-jameson is and how often [you]_186-jameson frequent this desk . This is [your]_186-jameson first and final warning , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan growls . “ Get back to work , and do not let [me]_246-alan catch [you]_186-jameson here again . ”_[246-alan] The blood drains from [Ricardo]_246-alan ’s face . “ Yes , [sir]_246-alan , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan whispers . [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} glares at [him]_246-alan and clenches [his]_246-alan jaw in anger . “ Go . Now . ”_[246-alan] [Ricardo]_246-alan practically runs back to [his]_246-alan desk , and [I]_2959-i stare at the gorgeous creature in front of [me]_2959-i . Gray suit , white shirt , paisley tie . [He]_246-alan really is the epitome of suit porn . “ [Emily]_186-jameson , [I]_246-alan need to see [you]_186-jameson in [[my]_246-alan office]_{455-my office} . Now , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan snaps before [he]_246-alan turns and strides back toward [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} , not bothering to wait for [my]_2959-i reply . [I]_2959-i swallow the lump in [my]_2959-i throat as [I]_2959-i stand . [Aaron]_0-aaron ’s , [Ava]_77-ava ’s , and [Molly]_198-molly ’s eyes are wide with fear . “ What the fuck ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron mouths as [he]_246-alan squeezes [my]_2959-i hand in sympathy . [I]_2959-i exhale heavily and turn and follow [the office god]_{498-the office god} into [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} as [everyone]_{2304-everyone} watches . The doors close behind [us]_500-we . [Jameson]_186-jameson glares at the doors , and [I]_2959-i twist [my]_2959-i fingers nervously in front of [me]_2959-i as [we]_500-we fly up through [the floors]_{501-the floors} . [Oh man]_{262-oh man} , [he]_{262-oh man} ’s going to fire [me]_2959-i . [That stupid fucking Ricardo]_246-alan has gotten [me]_2959-i into trouble . This is all [his]_246-alan fault . [I]_2959-i was n’t even talking back to [him]_246-alan . . . [you]_503-you know . When [we]_500-we get to the top floor , the doors open , and once again [he]_246-alan strides off . [I]_2959-i hesitate . Does [he]_246-alan expect [me]_2959-i to run after [him]_246-alan ? [I]_2959-i ’m not a fucking puppy . Who in the hell does [this asshole]_246-alan think [he]_246-alan is ? [I]_2959-i fake a smile at [[his]_246-alan receptionist]_{504-his receptionist} and storm in after [him]_246-alan . [He]_246-alan holds the office door open for [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i brush past [him]_246-alan . [He]_246-alan closes the door and flicks the lock . “ What are [you]_246-alan doing ? ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan snaps . “ Is that a trick question ? ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i hold [my]_2959-i arms out wide . “ [I]_2959-i ’m standing in [[your]_2959-i office]_{2452-your office} . What does it look like ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_246-alan mean , why the hell are [you]_246-alan openly flirting with [that idiot]_{2453-that idiot} from [downstairs]_{2454-downstairs} ? ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan demands . [My]_2959-i mouth falls open in horror . “ [I]_2959-i was n’t flirting . ”_[2959-i] “ Bullshit . [I]_2959-i saw it with [my]_2959-i own fucking eyes . ”_[2959-i] “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . “ Do n’t tell [me]_2959-i [you]_246-alan dragged [me]_2959-i all the way up here to chastise [me]_2959-i about talking at [my]_2959-i desk while [I]_2959-i work . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_246-alan am not paying [you]_246-alan to get hit on , [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan growls . [I]_2959-i put [my]_2959-i hands on [my]_2959-i hips as fury begins to pump through [my]_2959-i bloodstream . “ Listen here , [you]_246-alan . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i hold [my]_2959-i finger up . “ Firstly , [I]_246-alan ’ll get hit on by whomever [I]_246-alan want . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan narrows [his]_246-alan eyes and puts [his]_246-alan hands on [his]_246-alan hips , too , mirroring [my]_2959-i stance . “ [Secondly”—I]_{104-secondly”—i[2959-i]} put [my]_2959-i second finger up—“as [[my]_2959-i boss]_{2455-my boss} , [you]_246-alan do not get to comment on [my]_2959-i dating life . ”_[2959-i] “ Ha , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan huffs as [he]_246-alan rolls [his]_246-alan eyes in disgust . “ [Thirdly”—I]_{105-thirdly”—i[246-alan]} hold three fingers up—“I’m new in [town]_2456-town , and [I]_2959-i have [no friends]_{2457-no friends} , so if [he]_246-alan ’s being nice , [I]_2959-i ’m not going to be rude , am [I]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] “ Not on [my]_246-alan time , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan growls . “ Did [you]_246-alan really drag [me]_2959-i all the way up here just to say that ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ No , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan barks . “ [I]_246-alan want to know why [you]_246-alan wo n’t go out with [me]_246-alan . ”_[246-alan] [My]_2959-i face falls . “ Are [you]_246-alan serious ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ Deadly . ”_[2959-i] The mood between [us]_505-us changes and turns from anger to something else . “ Because [I]_246-alan ca n’t risk losing [my]_246-alan job if [we]_505-us do n’t work out . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan stares at [me]_2959-i for a moment . “ That job interview [you]_246-alan were going for twelve months ago . Was it here ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pause for a moment . Now [I]_2959-i ’m going to sound like [a loser]_{506-a loser} . “ Yes . ”_[2959-i] “ How long have [you]_246-alan been trying to get a job here ? ”_[2959-i] “ Three years , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i huff . “ So forgive [me]_2959-i if [I]_2959-i do n’t want to throw it away for a one - night stand . ”_[2959-i] “ Why would [you]_246-alan think [I]_2959-i would fire [you]_246-alan ? ”_[2959-i] “ Is n’t that what [CEOs]_106-ceos do when [they]_106-ceos have finished with [[their]_106-ceos secretaries]_{2458-their secretaries} ? Throw [them]_106-ceos to the side ? ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan frowns as [he]_246-alan watches [me]_2959-i . “ [I]_246-alan would n’t know — [I’ve]_2959-i never been attracted to [someone [I]_246-alan work with]_{2459-someone i work with} . And besides , [I]_246-alan think [this place]_{399-sky bar} is big enough that [we]_2461-we could stay out of each other ’s way . ”_[246-alan] “ [You]_246-alan ’re still attracted to [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ [You]_246-alan know [I]_246-alan am , and it ’s just dinner , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan snaps . “ [Nobody]_2321-nobody would even know , and [I]_246-alan most certainly would n’t fire [you]_246-alan in the morning . ”_[246-alan] “ So . . . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown as [I]_2959-i try to work out what the hell it is that [he]_246-alan wants . “ [You]_246-alan would keep [me]_246-alan a dirty little secret ? ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan steps forward so that [our]_507-our faces are only an inch apart ; [our]_507-our eyes are locked . Energy begins to spark between [us]_507-our , and [I]_2959-i feel [my]_2959-i arousal sweep in . “ Were [you]_246-alan in a relationship when [we]_507-our spent the night together ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ What makes [you]_246-alan say that ? ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_246-alan never asked for [my]_246-alan number . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan gives [me]_2959-i a slow , sexy smile as [he]_246-alan tucks a piece of [my]_2959-i hair behind [my]_2959-i ear . “ Does [everybody]_{2463-everybody} ask for [your]_246-alan number , [Emily]_186-jameson ? ”_[246-alan] [His]_246-alan voice has dropped to a deep , sexy tone . “ Pretty much . ”_[246-alan] “ [I]_246-alan was n’t looking for anything back then , and [I]_246-alan most definitely do n’t tell [people]_248-people [I]_246-alan ’m going to call [them]_248-people if [I]_246-alan ’m not . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan dusts [his]_246-alan thumb over [my]_2959-i bottom lip as [I]_2959-i stare up into [his]_246-alan big blue eyes . “ Tonight , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan whispers . [I]_2959-i smile softly as [his]_246-alan breath tickles [my]_2959-i skin . [He]_246-alan really is quite . . . “ [I]_246-alan ’ll pick [you]_246-alan up . Dinner at [[my]_246-alan favorite Italian restaurant]_{2465-my favorite italian restaurant} . . . ”_[246-alan] [His]_246-alan voice trails off as if [he]_246-alan ’s imagining something else . Oh , that sounds good . [I]_2959-i smile as [he]_246-alan leans closer . [His]_246-alan lips tenderly touch [mine]_2959-i as [he]_246-alan holds [my]_2959-i jaw in [his]_246-alan hand . [My]_2959-i eyes close as [my]_2959-i feet lift from the floor . [Robbie]_56-robbie . . . what the hell am [I]_2959-i doing ? Damn [this man]_56-robbie . What is this spell that [he]_246-alan has over [me]_2959-i that makes [me]_2959-i do the most random things ? Like one - night stands and forgetting [I]_2959-i ’m in a committed relationship . . . and breathing . Oh [[my]_2959-i God]_{2363-my god} . [I]_2959-i have [a boyfriend]_{450-a boyfriend} . Shit . “ [I]_2959-i ’m so sorry if [I]_2959-i gave [you]_2959-i the wrong idea . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i take a step back from [him]_246-alan . “ [I]_2959-i have [a boyfriend]_{450-a boyfriend} , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i blurt out . [His]_246-alan face falls in horror . “ What ? ”_[246-alan] “ [I]_2959-i know . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i wince . “ [I]_2959-i . . . [I]_2959-i . . . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shake [my]_2959-i head because [I]_2959-i have no words that can get [me]_2959-i out of this . “ [I]_2959-i have [a boyfriend]_{450-a boyfriend} , and [I]_2959-i ca n’t go out with [you]_{450-a boyfriend} . ”_[2959-i] “ Dump [him]_246-alan , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan fires back . “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i croak . “ [You]_{450-a boyfriend} heard [me]_246-alan . Dump [him]_246-alan . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan reaches for [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i step back to create distance between [us]_510-us . “ Are [you]_{450-a boyfriend} crazy ? ”_[2959-i] “ Maybe . ”_[246-alan] “ [I]_2959-i ca n’t dump [a boyfriend]_{450-a boyfriend} for one night of sex . ”_[2959-i] “ Yes . [You]_{450-a boyfriend} can . ”_[2959-i] “ [Jameson]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i drag [my]_2959-i hands through [my]_2959-i hair . “ Have [you]_{450-a boyfriend} completely lost [your]_{450-a boyfriend} mind ? ”_[2959-i] “ Quite possibly . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan hands [me]_2959-i a business card . “ Call [me]_186-jameson , and [I]_186-jameson ’ll come and get [you]_{450-a boyfriend} . ”_{[186-jameson]} [JAMESON]_186-jameson MILES MILES MEDIA 212 - 639 - 8999 [I]_2959-i stare at the card in [my]_2959-i hand , [my]_2959-i mind a clusterfuck of confusion . [My]_2959-i eyes rise to meet [his]_246-alan . [I]_2959-i know what this is to [him]_246-alan — it ’s just another one - night stand . One night that could ruin every plan [I]_2959-i ’ve made for [myself]_2959-i and jeopardize [my]_2959-i career . [I]_2959-i ’ve worked too damn hard to get to [New York]_{385-new york} to throw it away now for one night with [a player]_{511-a player} . It ’s the weirdest thing — [I]_2959-i never picked [him]_246-alan as [a player when [we]_512-we were together]_{511-a player} , but the more [I]_2959-i get to know [him]_246-alan , the more [I]_2959-i realize [I]_2959-i never knew [him]_246-alan at all . The worst part about it is that [I]_2959-i know [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson is the kind of drug that [I]_2959-i do n’t need an addiction to . The memory of [our]_512-we night together is bad enough . “ [I]_2959-i ’m sorry . [I]_2959-i just ca n’t . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i turn to walk out of [the office]_{385-new york} . [My]_2959-i body screams for [me]_2959-i to go back , and then [I]_2959-i stop as a thought crosses [my]_2959-i mind . [I]_2959-i turn back toward [him]_246-alan . “ How did [you]_2959-i know ? ”_[2959-i] [He]_246-alan lifts [his]_246-alan chin as [my]_2959-i eyes search [his]_246-alan . [I]_2959-i walk back toward [him]_246-alan . “ How did [you]_2959-i know that [Ricardo]_246-alan has been at [my]_2959-i desk ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i glance around [the room]_{514-the room} and see nothing but a mirror on the wall . “ Are there cameras in [here]_{385-new york} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ Never mind . ”_[2959-i] “ Oh , but [I]_2959-i do , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sneer . “ [I]_246-alan think [I]_246-alan have a right to know , if it concerns [me]_246-alan . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan picks up a remote from [his]_246-alan desk and pushes a button . “ Give [me]_246-alan level forty , please , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan commands . The mirror turns into a television screen . It rolls a few times , and then a vision of [my]_2959-i office floor appears . [I]_2959-i see [Aaron]_0-aaron and [Molly]_198-molly and . . . [my]_2959-i desk . What the hell ? “ [You]_0-aaron ’ve been watching [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i gasp . “ Why ? ”_[246-alan] [His]_246-alan dark eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ Because it turns [me]_246-alan on . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan grabs [my]_2959-i hand and puts it over [his]_246-alan crotch , and [I]_2959-i can feel [his]_246-alan rock - hard erection in [his]_246-alan suit pants . The air leaves [my]_2959-i lungs as [I]_2959-i stare up at [him]_246-alan , and unable to help it , [I]_2959-i wrap [my]_2959-i hand around [his]_246-alan hard length . [We]_515-we stare at each other as [our]_515-we bodies ’ desires take over . “ [I]_2959-i just ca n’t , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [His]_246-alan hand cups [my]_2959-i face . “ [I]_246-alan want [you]_246-alan . ”_[246-alan] “ [You]_246-alan do n’t always get what [you]_246-alan want , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i breathe . “ [I]_246-alan do . ”_[246-alan] [His]_246-alan mouth drops to [my]_2959-i neck , and in slow motion , [he]_246-alan licks from [my]_2959-i collarbone up [my]_2959-i neck and then whispers in [my]_2959-i ear , “ Get rid of [him]_246-alan . ”_[246-alan] Goose bumps shoot up [my]_2959-i spine , and [I]_2959-i step back , overwhelmed by the physical effect [he]_246-alan has on [me]_2959-i . [He]_246-alan grabs the erection in [his]_246-alan pants and rearranges it as [we]_516-we stare at each other . “ [I]_2959-i ’ve got to get back to work , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i breathe . [He]_246-alan glares at [me]_2959-i , [his]_246-alan face cold , and [my]_2959-i chest rises and falls as [I]_2959-i fight [my]_2959-i arousal . It ’s taking every inch of [my]_2959-i self - control not to jump on [him]_246-alan , right here , right now . [He]_246-alan ’s so hard under that suit . . . such a waste . No . [I]_2959-i turn and walk out , take [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} , and before [I]_2959-i know it , [I]_2959-i ’m back down to [my]_2959-i floor . [My]_2959-i heart is beating heavily in [my]_2959-i chest , and [I]_2959-i ’m in complete and utter shock . That may just be the hottest thing that ’s ever happened to [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i fall into [my]_2959-i seat , visibly shaken . “ Oh [my]_0-aaron God , ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron whispers . [Molly]_198-molly slides [her]_198-molly seat over to [me]_2959-i . “ Holy shit , what happened ? ”_[198-molly] “ [I]_2959-i have no idea , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i murmur as [my]_2959-i eyes go to the ceiling . Where are the cameras ? [I]_2959-i think back to what angle [I]_2959-i saw on [his]_0-aaron screen , and [I]_2959-i look in that direction and see it . A small black glass dome . [I]_2959-i glare at it , and [I]_2959-i know [he]_0-aaron ’s watching [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i can feel [his]_0-aaron eyes on [my]_2959-i skin . What ’s [he]_0-aaron thinking about as [he]_0-aaron watches [me]_2959-i ? An unwelcome wave of excitement rushes through [me]_2959-i as [I]_2959-i imagine [him]_0-aaron up there , hard and watching [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i feel like taking off [my]_2959-i clothes and lying back on [my]_2959-i desk and opening [my]_2959-i legs to give [him]_0-aaron something to really look at . Can [he]_0-aaron hear what [we]_518-we ’re saying ? Is there audio on that thing ? “ What happened ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron whispers . “ [I]_2959-i ca n’t talk now . There are cameras , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i murmur with [my]_2959-i head down . “ But [we]_518-we need to have some seriously strong drinks after work . ”_[2959-i] “ [Jesus]_107-jesus , ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly whispers as [she]_198-molly turns back to [her]_198-molly computer . “ [Stupid fucking Ricardo]_246-alan , ”_[77-ava] [Ava]_77-ava huffs . “ [He]_246-alan ’s going to get [us]_518-we all fired . Why did n’t [he]_246-alan get hauled into [the damn office]_{2467-the damn office} ? ”_[77-ava] “ [I]_2959-i know . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i open [my]_2959-i email and stare at it for a moment as [I]_2959-i try to calm [myself]_2959-i down . [I]_2959-i know exactly why . Because [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson does n’t want to fuck [Ricardo]_246-alan — [he]_246-alan wants to fuck [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i bite [my]_2959-i bottom lip to keep [my]_2959-i slutty smile from escaping onto [my]_2959-i face . [New York]_{385-new york} is so fun . It ’s five thirty , and [we]_519-we ’ve just left work and are standing on [the curb outside [the Miles Media building]_{521-the miles media building}]_{520-the curb outside the miles media building} while [we]_519-we decide where to go for dinner . It ’s the weirdest thing ; it ’s as if along with this job , [I]_2959-i was [gifted three friends]_{522-gifted three friends} and unlimited options . Every night is Saturday night in [New York]_{385-new york} . [We]_519-we ’re all different ages , with different lifestyles , but somehow [we]_519-we get along famously . [Ava]_77-ava has a date and is n’t coming with [us]_519-we , but [Aaron]_0-aaron and [Molly]_198-molly are by [my]_2959-i side . “ What do [you]_198-molly feel like eating ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly says as [she]_198-molly scrolls through [her]_198-molly phone . “ Something fattening and greasy . [Paul]_101-paul has n’t called [me]_0-aaron . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron sighs . “ [I]_0-aaron ’m off [him]_101-paul . ”_[0-aaron] “ Oh God , will [you]_198-molly dump [him]_101-paul already ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly huffs with an eye roll . “ [I]_198-molly swear [he]_101-paul ’s seeing [someone else on the side]_{2468-someone else on the side} , and besides , [he]_101-paul ’s nowhere near hot enough for [you]_198-molly . ”_[198-molly] The front door of [the building]_{361-the building} is opened by [a man in a black suit]_{524-a man in a black suit} , and [the three of [us]_{2390-his brothers}]_{2390-his brothers} turn . [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson walks out with [another man]_{526-another man} . [The two of [them]_{2390-his brothers}]_{2390-his brothers} are deep in conversation and oblivious to [anyone else]_{527-anyone else} . “ Who ’s that with [him]_101-paul ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ That ’s one of [[his]_101-paul brothers]_{2390-his brothers} , [Tristan Miles]_2430-tristan . [He]_101-paul ’s in charge of global acquisitions , ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron whispers as [his]_0-aaron eyes stay glued to [them]_{2390-his brothers} . “ [I]_0-aaron swear to [God]_0-aaron , [these men]_{2390-his brothers} are so fucking hot it ’s unbearable . ”_[0-aaron] [They]_{2390-his brothers} have this charismatic air about [them]_{2390-his brothers} , [their]_{2390-his brothers} stances the epitome of power . [[Everyone]_109-everyone around [them]_{2390-his brothers}]_{528-everyone around them} stops and stares . Fitted expensive suits , handsome as all hell , cultured , and wealthy . [I]_2959-i swallow the lump in [my]_2959-i throat as [I]_2959-i watch in silence . In slow motion , [they]_{2390-his brothers} walk out and get into the back of [the waiting black limousine]_{529-the waiting black limousine} . [The driver]_{530-the driver} shuts the door behind [them]_{2390-his brothers} , and [we]_531-we watch as it drives away . [I]_2959-i turn to [[my]_2959-i new friends]_{532-my new friends} . “ [I]_2959-i really need to talk to [somebody]_251-somebody . ”_[2959-i] “ About what ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron frowns . “ Can [you]_0-aaron two keep a secret ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [They]_{2390-his brothers} exchange looks . “ Yeah , of course [we]_531-we can . ”_{[2390-his brothers]} “ Let ’s get to [the bar]_{459-the bar} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sigh as [I]_2959-i link [my]_2959-i arms through [theirs]_{2390-his brothers} and begin to drag [them]_{2390-his brothers} to cross [the road]_{533-the road} . “ [You]_0-aaron ’re not going to believe what [I]_198-molly have to tell [you]_0-aaron . ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly arrives with [our]_534-our drinks on a tray and drops into [her]_198-molly seat . “ So go . Did [he]_0-aaron give [you]_0-aaron a warning letter ? ”_[198-molly] [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i margarita . “ Hmm , this is good . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown as [I]_2959-i inspect the icy yellow fluid . [Aaron]_0-aaron sips [his]_0-aaron . “ Ew , [I]_0-aaron hate [this bartender]_0-aaron . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron winces . “ Will [you]_0-aaron stop whining ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly snaps . “ It ’s like hanging out with [[my]_198-molly fucking kids]_{2471-my fucking kids} . ”_[198-molly] “ This drink is too strong , ”_[0-aaron] [he]_0-aaron chokes . “ [I]_198-molly notice [you]_0-aaron did n’t get one . ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly ’s attention comes back to [me]_2959-i . “ Anyway , what ’s this secret ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stare at [them]_535-they . [God]_0-aaron , [I]_2959-i do n’t even know if [I]_2959-i should be saying anything to [anyone]_272-anyone , but [I]_2959-i need [someone]_2326-someone to talk to . “ Promise [me]_2959-i [you]_0-aaron wo n’t say anything to [anyone]_272-anyone . Not even [Ava]_77-ava , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ Yes . ”_[535-they] [They]_535-they both roll [their]_535-they eyes . “ Okay , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i continue . “ [You]_0-aaron know how [I]_2959-i told [you]_0-aaron [I]_2959-i have been trying to get a job at [Miles Media]_{14-miles media} for over three years ? ”_[2959-i] “ Uh - huh . ”_[0-aaron] “ Well , just over twelve months ago [I]_0-aaron went to a wedding in [London]_6-london , and [I]_0-aaron was flying directly back to [New York]_{385-new york} for an interview [here]_{385-new york} . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron frowns as [he]_0-aaron concentrates on [my]_2959-i story . “ At [the airport in [London]_6-london]_{2473-the airport in london} , [this fruitcake man behind [me]_0-aaron in the line]_{2474-this fruitcake man behind me in the line} was having some kind of episode and started throwing [my]_0-aaron bag around . ”_[0-aaron] [They]_535-they both stare at [me]_2959-i , confused . “ Anyway , [the security guard]_{263-the security guard} ushered [me]_535-they to the check - in counter and told [the guy]_56-robbie to look after [me]_535-they . [I]_535-they was given an upgrade to first class . ”_[535-they] “ How cool . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron smiles and raises [his]_0-aaron drink happily . [I]_2959-i brace [myself]_2959-i for the next part of the story . “ [I]_2959-i was seated next to [this man]_56-robbie , and [we]_2477-we began drinking champagne and . . . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug . “ The more [we]_2477-we drank , the more inappropriate [we]_2477-we got , and [we]_2477-we began talking about [our]_2477-we sex lives . ”_[2959-i] “ Did [you]_2959-i get kicked off [the plane]_{268-the plane} ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron says , with wide eyes . “ No . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i drink . “ Could have easily , though . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron puts [his]_0-aaron hand to [his]_0-aaron chest in relief . “ Then there was a blizzard in [New York]_{385-new york} , and [we]_2477-we had to fly on to [Boston]_{385-new york} for an overnight layover . [This guy]_0-aaron was like . . . ridiculously hot . ”_[0-aaron] [I]_2959-i smile as [I]_2959-i remember [him]_0-aaron . “ [He]_0-aaron was so not [my]_2959-i type , and [I]_2959-i was n’t [his]_0-aaron , but somehow [we]_2477-we ended up fucking like rabbits all night long . It was the best sex [I]_2959-i ’ve ever had in [my]_2959-i life . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_198-molly love this story . ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly smiles . “ Go [you]_198-molly . ”_[198-molly] “ [I]_198-molly never saw [him]_0-aaron again . ”_[198-molly] [Her]_198-molly face falls . “ [He]_0-aaron did n’t call ? ”_[198-molly] “ [He]_0-aaron never asked for [my]_198-molly number . ”_[198-molly] “ [Ouch]_99-ouch . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron winces . “ [I]_0-aaron know ; so [you]_198-molly can imagine [my]_0-aaron horror when [I]_0-aaron saw [him]_0-aaron at work this week . ”_[0-aaron] “ What ? ”_[538-they] [they]_538-they both gasp . “ Oh [my]_0-aaron God , it ’s fucking [Ricardo]_246-alan , is n’t it ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron frowns as [he]_0-aaron takes a big mouthful of [his]_0-aaron drink . “ [I]_0-aaron ca n’t handle this story . Please do n’t tell [me]_0-aaron [you]_198-molly fucked [him]_0-aaron , and [he]_0-aaron gave [you]_198-molly an STD . [I]_0-aaron wo n’t be able to cope . ”_[0-aaron] “ It was [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson . ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly ’s eyes nearly bulge from [her]_198-molly head . “ What ? ”_[198-molly] “ Are [you]_198-molly fucking kidding [me]_0-aaron ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron gasps and accidentally snorts [his]_0-aaron drink up [his]_0-aaron nose and has a coughing fit . [They]_539-they both stare at [me]_2959-i , wide eyed . “ When [I]_198-molly went to [[his]_0-aaron office]_{426-his office} on the tour , [he]_0-aaron asked to be left alone with [me]_198-molly . ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly shakes [her]_198-molly head . “ Is this real ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i nod . “ [I]_198-molly have no words for this story , ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly whispers . “ [I]_0-aaron do — oh [[my]_0-aaron fucking God]_{2480-my fucking god} . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron hits [her]_198-molly on the arm in excitement . “ What happened ? ”_[0-aaron] “ [He]_0-aaron asked [me]_198-molly out to dinner . ”_[198-molly] “ What the actual fuck ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly cries really loud . “ Shh , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper as [I]_2959-i look at [the people around [us]_541-us]_{540-the people around us} . “ Keep [your]_0-aaron voice down . ”_[2959-i] “ Are [you]_0-aaron serious ? ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly whispers . “ [I]_198-molly said no . ”_[198-molly] “ What ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron cries this time . “ Keep . [Your]_0-aaron . Voice . Down , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i demand . “ [I]_2959-i ca n’t go out with [him]_0-aaron . [I]_2959-i have [a boyfriend]_{2443-your boyfriend} . ”_[2959-i] “ [[Your]_0-aaron boyfriend]_{2443-your boyfriend} ’s a dick . [You]_0-aaron even said so [yourself]_0-aaron , ”_[198-molly] [Molly stammers]_198-molly . “ [I]_0-aaron know , but [I]_0-aaron ’m not wired like that . [I]_0-aaron would never cheat on [somebody]_251-somebody . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron shakes [his]_0-aaron head . “ [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson could wire [me]_0-aaron any way [he]_0-aaron wanted to . ”_[0-aaron] “ Right ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly agrees . “ What happened today ? ”_[198-molly] “ [He]_0-aaron marched [me]_542-me up to [[his]_0-aaron office]_{426-his office} and accused [me]_542-me of getting hit on in [my]_542-me working time . ”_[542-me] [Their]_542-me mouths fall open in horror . “ And . . . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pause . [I]_2959-i probably should n’t tell [them]_542-me [we]_543-we are being watched . [I]_2959-i ’ll keep that one to [myself]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i dig out [his]_0-aaron card from [my]_2959-i wallet and slide it across the table , and [Molly]_198-molly picks it up and stares at it . “ Even [his]_0-aaron name is hot . ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly reads the card out loud . “ [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson . Miles Media . 212 - 639 - 8999 . ”_[198-molly] “ [I]_2959-i told [him]_0-aaron [he]_0-aaron could n’t have everything [he]_0-aaron wanted , and [he]_0-aaron said [he]_0-aaron does , and then [he]_0-aaron licked [my]_2959-i neck , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i blurt out . “ [He]_0-aaron licked [your]_2959-i neck ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron shrieks . “ Oh [Lord]_2484-lord have mercy . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron picks up the menu and begins to fan [his]_0-aaron face . “ Please tell [me]_0-aaron [you]_2959-i ’re going out with [him]_0-aaron tonight . ”_[0-aaron] “ No . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug . “ [I]_2959-i ca n’t , and besides , it ’s the fastest way [I]_2959-i know how to get fired . ”_[2959-i] “ No job is that good , ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron snaps . “ [I]_544-we would n’t turn [him]_0-aaron down to be [the fucking president]_0-aaron . ”_[544-we] [We]_544-we all giggle , and then [my]_2959-i phone vibrates across the table . “ Oh . . . [my]_198-molly fucking God , ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly whispers as [she]_198-molly stares at [my]_2959-i phone . “ It ’s [him]_0-aaron . ”_[198-molly] “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer as [I]_2959-i look down at the number lighting up the screen . [She]_198-molly holds up the business card in [her]_198-molly hands , and [we]_544-we compare them . “ The number calling [you]_0-aaron is fucking [him]_0-aaron . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes widen . Holy shit . Chapter 5 “ Answer it , answer it , ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron cries . “ What do [I]_0-aaron do ? ”_[0-aaron] [I]_2959-i flap [my]_2959-i arms around in a panic . “ Holy fuck . Answer it , ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly demands as [she]_198-molly picks it up . “ Do n’t answer it , ”_[198-molly] [I]_2959-i stammer as [I]_2959-i try to grab it from [her]_198-molly hands . [She]_198-molly holds it in the air and waves it around . “ Answer it , [woman]_198-molly , ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly demands . [I]_2959-i snatch it from [her]_198-molly and stare at it while it buzzes . “ [I]_0-aaron ’m not going to answer it . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron snatches the phone from [me]_2959-i and hits answer . “ Hello , ”_[0-aaron] [he]_0-aaron says in [a fake girl]_{545-a fake girl} ’s voice , and then [he]_0-aaron passes it over to [me]_2959-i . “ What the fuck ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i mouth . “ Hello , [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s velvety voice purrs . [My]_2959-i eyes widen as [I]_2959-i look at [[my]_2959-i friends]_{546-my friends} ’ awestruck faces . [Aaron]_0-aaron crosses [himself]_0-aaron as if [he]_0-aaron ’s in [church]_547-church and makes a praying gesture . “ Hello . ”_[0-aaron] “ Where are [you]_186-jameson ? ”_[0-aaron] [he]_0-aaron asks . “ In [a bar]_{2485-a bar} . ”_[0-aaron] [I]_2959-i glance around as [I]_2959-i hold [my]_2959-i hand over [my]_2959-i other ear to try to hear [him]_0-aaron better . Shit , [I]_2959-i ’m not telling [him]_0-aaron where [I]_2959-i am ; [I]_2959-i look like crap . [I]_2959-i hold [my]_2959-i breath as [I]_2959-i listen . “ [I]_2959-i want to see [you]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i bite [my]_2959-i bottom lip , and [Molly]_198-molly hits [me]_2959-i on the arm to snap [me]_2959-i out of [my]_2959-i nervous freeze . “ [I]_2959-i told [you]_2959-i [I]_2959-i have [a boyfriend]_{450-a boyfriend} , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i blurt out . “ [I]_2959-i ca n’t see [you]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] “ Holy fucking shit , ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron mouths to [Molly]_198-molly as [he]_0-aaron scrunches [his]_0-aaron hands in [his]_0-aaron hair . “ And [I]_0-aaron told [you]_2959-i to get rid of [him]_0-aaron . ”_[0-aaron] “ Who do [you]_2959-i think [you]_2959-i are ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer . [Molly]_198-molly and [Aaron]_0-aaron listen intently . “ Go outside . [I]_0-aaron ca n’t hear [you]_2959-i , ”_[0-aaron] [he]_0-aaron barks . [I]_2959-i stand and walk through [the bar]_{459-the bar} and outside onto [the curb]_{549-the curb} , and it falls silent . “ That ’s better , ”_[0-aaron] [he]_0-aaron says . [I]_2959-i glance up [the street]_{550-the street} at [the cabs]_{551-the cabs} all in a row . “ What do [you]_2959-i want , [Jameson]_186-jameson ? ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_2959-i know what [I]_0-aaron want . ”_[0-aaron] “ [I]_2959-i have [a boyfriend]_{450-a boyfriend} . ”_[2959-i] “ And [I]_2959-i told [you]_2959-i what to do . ”_[2959-i] “ It ’s not that simple . ”_[0-aaron] “ Yes , it is . Give [me]_2959-i [his]_56-robbie number , and [I]_2959-i ’ll save [you]_2959-i the job . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smirk at the audacity of [this man]_56-robbie . “ [You]_2959-i know , [your]_2959-i arrogance is a turnoff . ”_[2959-i] That ’s a blatant lie — not even close . “ And [you]_2959-i ’re a turn - on . [I]_2959-i ’ve been hard all day . Get over here , and put [me]_2959-i out of [my]_2959-i misery . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i hear [my]_2959-i heartbeat in [my]_2959-i ears . Is this really happening ? [A drunk couple]_{553-a drunk couple} totter past [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i have to move so [they]_{553-a drunk couple} do n’t run into [me]_2959-i . “ Sorry , ”_{[553-a drunk couple]} [they]_{553-a drunk couple} call . “ [I]_2959-i ’m flying out to [California]_{12-california} in the morning , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i blurt out . “ To see [him]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] “ Yes . ”_[2959-i] “ [He]_2959-i stayed behind ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i scrunch [my]_2959-i face up tight . Damn it . Why did [I]_2959-i say that ? “ Yes . ”_[2959-i] “ When [you]_2959-i see [him]_2959-i , [I]_2959-i want [you]_2959-i to do something for [me]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] “ What ’s that ? ”_[2959-i] “ Ask [him]_2959-i if [he]_2959-i feels like [he]_2959-i might die if [he]_2959-i does n’t get to touch [you]_2959-i again . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ Why would [I]_2959-i ask [him]_2959-i that ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ Because there ’s [another man who does]_{2488-another man who does} . ”_[2959-i] The phone clicks as [he]_554-he hangs up . [I]_2959-i frown as [I]_2959-i stare at the phone in [my]_2959-i hand as [I]_2959-i feel tingles all the way to [my]_2959-i toes . Holy fucking shit . [I]_2959-i put [my]_2959-i hand over [my]_2959-i mouth ; [I]_2959-i ca n’t believe this . [I]_2959-i stumble back into [the bar]_{459-the bar} to find [[my]_2959-i two friends]_{556-my two friends} bouncing in [their]_{556-my two friends} chairs as [they]_{556-my two friends} wait for [my]_2959-i return . “ What happened ? ”_{[556-my two friends]} [they]_{556-my two friends} all but scream . [I]_2959-i slump and put [my]_2959-i hands in [my]_2959-i hair . “ [He]_0-aaron wanted [me]_2959-i to go over to [[his]_0-aaron place]_{2489-his place} and put [him]_0-aaron out of [his]_0-aaron misery . ”_[2959-i] “ Holy fucking shit , ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron cries . “ Can [I]_0-aaron have [your]_0-aaron autograph ? ”_[0-aaron] “ Are [you]_0-aaron going ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly stammers . “ Please tell [me]_2959-i [you]_0-aaron ’re going . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shake [my]_2959-i head . “ No . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i think for a moment . “ [He]_0-aaron told [me]_557-me to ask [[my]_557-me boyfriend]_{2490-my boyfriend} if [he]_0-aaron felt like [he]_0-aaron would die if [he]_0-aaron did n’t get to touch [me]_557-me again . ”_[557-me] [They]_557-me frown as [they]_557-me listen . “ Because there is [another man who does]_{2488-another man who does} . ”_[557-me] “ What ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly screeches . “ Oh holy hell , [we]_557-me need tequila . ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly gets up and disappears to [the bar]_{459-the bar} . “ [He]_0-aaron asked [you]_0-aaron to [[his]_0-aaron place]_{2489-his place} ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron squeaks . [I]_2959-i nod . “ Do [you]_0-aaron know where [he]_0-aaron lives ? ”_[2959-i] “ No . ”_[557-me] “ [Park Avenue]_{16-park avenue} , overlooking [Central Park]_{17-central park} . ”_[2959-i] “ How do [you]_0-aaron know that ? ”_[2959-i] “ [Google]_110-google . [He]_0-aaron used to live in [the One57 Billionaire Building]_{2493-the one57 billionaire building} , but [he]_0-aaron moved out of there and into [a building on [Park Avenue]_{16-park avenue}]_{2494-his apartment} . [[His]_0-aaron apartment]_{2494-his apartment} is worth something like fifty million . ”_[557-me] “ Fifty million , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i gasp . “ Are [you]_0-aaron serious ? How could anything be worth fifty million dollars ? That ’s just ridiculous . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron shrugs . “ Beats [me]_2959-i . Must have gold toilets or something . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i giggle as [I]_2959-i get a vision of [someone]_2326-someone sitting on a gold toilet . [Molly]_198-molly sits back in [her]_198-molly seat and hands [me]_2959-i a shot of tequila . “ Drink this , and then go and fuck [him]_0-aaron stupid . ”_[198-molly] “ [I]_2959-i ’m not going , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . “ Well , what ’s the plan of attack ? ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly asks . “ Are [you]_0-aaron playing hard to get ? ”_[198-molly] “ No attack . [I]_2959-i ’m going [home]_2289-home to see [Robbie]_56-robbie tomorrow . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i exhale heavily . “ [I]_0-aaron need to sort out [our]_2496-our relationship , and hopefully [he]_0-aaron will come back with [me]_0-aaron . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron rolls [his]_0-aaron eyes in disappointment . “ Ca n’t [you]_0-aaron at least be as excited about [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson as [we]_2496-our are ? ”_[0-aaron] “ No . [I]_2959-i ’m not . And remember , not a word to [anyone]_272-anyone . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i drink . “ [I]_2959-i know exactly what will happen with [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i ’ll sleep with [him]_0-aaron once , and then [he]_0-aaron will move on to [[his]_0-aaron next victim]_{2498-his next victim} , and [I]_2959-i ’ll be conveniently fired . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shake [my]_2959-i head in disgust . “ [I]_0-aaron ’ve worked too damn hard to get this job , and this is [the man who did n’t even want [my]_0-aaron number the last time [we]_2499-we slept together]_0-aaron . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron turns up [his]_0-aaron nose . “ God , why are [you]_198-molly so sensible ? ”_[0-aaron] “ [I]_2959-i know , it totally sucks . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sigh . [Molly]_198-molly ’s phone rings . “ Please let it be [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson looking for a backup plan , ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly huffs with an eye roll . “ Hello . ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly frowns as [she]_198-molly listens . “ Oh hello , [Margaret]_111-margaret . Yes , [I]_198-molly remember who [you]_111-margaret are . [You]_111-margaret ’re [[Chanel]_112-chanel ’s mother]_{2500-chanel ’s mother} . ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly smiles as [she]_198-molly listens , and then [her]_198-molly face falls . “ What ? ”_[198-molly] [Her]_198-molly eyes widen . “ Are [you]_111-margaret serious ? ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly pinches the bridge of [her]_198-molly nose . “ Yes . ”_[198-molly] It sounds like [she]_198-molly ’s unable to get a word in . “ [I]_198-molly can understand why [you]_111-margaret ’re upset . ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly narrows [her]_198-molly eyes and shakes [her]_198-molly head at [us]_560-us . “ [I]_0-aaron ’m so sorry . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron and [I]_2959-i frown at each other . “ What ’s happened ? ”_[0-aaron] [I]_2959-i mouth . “ How explicit are [we]_560-us talking ? ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly asks . [Her]_198-molly eyes widen . “ Oh [my]_198-molly God , [I]_198-molly ’m so sorry . ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly listens . “ No , please , do n’t go to [the principal]_{2501-the principal} . [I]_198-molly appreciate [you]_{2501-the principal} calling [me]_198-molly first . ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly closes [her]_198-molly eyes as [she]_198-molly listens . “ Once again , [my]_198-molly sincere apologies . Thank [you]_{2501-the principal} . [I]_198-molly ’ll handle it , yes . Goodbye . ”_[198-molly] “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . [She]_198-molly puts [her]_198-molly head in [her]_198-molly hands . “ Oh [[my]_198-molly God]_{2363-my god} . That was [[Chanel]_112-chanel ’s mother]_{2500-chanel ’s mother} , the girl [[my]_198-molly son]_{2504-my son} is crushing on . [She]_{2500-chanel ’s mother} went through [Chanel]_112-chanel ’s phone and found provocative messages between [them]_2505-them . ”_[198-molly] [I]_2959-i bite [my]_2959-i lip to stop [myself]_2959-i from smiling as [I]_2959-i listen . “ That ’s pretty normal in this day and age , is n’t it ? ”_[198-molly] [I]_2959-i try to make [her]_198-molly feel better . “ [I]_2959-i think [they]_2505-them all do it . ”_[2959-i] “ How old is [this girl]_198-molly ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron asks . “ Fifteen , ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly cries . [I]_2959-i giggle as [I]_2959-i listen . God , [I]_2959-i ca n’t imagine what it ’s like to have [a teenage son]_{561-a teenage son} . [She]_198-molly dials [[her]_198-molly ex - husband]_{562-her ex - husband} ’s number . “ Hello , ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly snaps . “ Go into [[[your]_0-aaron son]_{561-a teenage son} ’s bedroom]_{2506-your son ’s bedroom} , and grab [his]_{561-a teenage son} phone , and throw the damn thing in [the toilet]_{2507-the toilet} . [He]_{561-a teenage son} is grounded for life . ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly listens . [Aaron]_0-aaron and [I]_2959-i begin to giggle uncontrollably . “ [Michael]_60-michael , ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly says as [she]_198-molly inhales deeply to try to calm down . “ [I]_198-molly know [he]_60-michael ’s been seeing [her]_198-molly , and [I]_198-molly know [she]_198-molly probably likes it . [He]_60-michael ’s fifteen years old , ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly whispers angrily . “ Take [his]_60-michael phone , or be prepared for [me]_198-molly to come over and smash it . ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly hangs up in a rush and puts [her]_198-molly head down on the table and pretends to bang it continually . [Aaron]_0-aaron and [I]_2959-i burst out laughing , and [I]_2959-i put [my]_2959-i hand on [her]_198-molly back . “ Do [you]_2508-you want some more tequila , [Moll]_198-molly ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask sweetly . “ Yes . . . [I]_198-molly do . Make it a double , ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly snaps angrily . [I]_2959-i stand at the bar as [I]_2959-i look over at the table , and [Aaron]_0-aaron has [his]_0-aaron hand over [his]_0-aaron mouth in uncontrollable giggles . [I]_2959-i drop [my]_2959-i head to hide [my]_2959-i goofy smile . This is hilarious . . . because it ’s not happening to [me]_2959-i . “ Hey . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile as [Robbie]_56-robbie opens [his]_56-robbie front door . “ Hey , [you]_56-robbie . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie smiles as [he]_56-robbie wraps [me]_2959-i in [his]_56-robbie arms . “ This is a surprise . ”_[56-robbie] “ [I]_56-robbie know . [I]_56-robbie was missing [you]_56-robbie , so [I]_56-robbie flew [home]_2289-home this morning for the night . ”_[56-robbie] “ Come in . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie drags [me]_2959-i into [[his]_56-robbie converted garage]_{563-his converted garage} . [I]_2959-i could n’t sleep last night . [I]_2959-i was worried about [my]_2959-i feelings , and [I]_2959-i ca n’t stop thinking about stupid [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i got up and went straight to [the airport]_{254-the airport} and caught the flight out . [I]_2959-i look around [[Robbie]_56-robbie ’s tiny studio apartment]_{565-robbie ’s tiny studio apartment} and at the empty pizza boxes and dirty glasses lying around . “ What have [you]_56-robbie been doing ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ Nothing much . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie smiles ; [he]_56-robbie lies on the bed and taps it beside [him]_56-robbie . [I]_2959-i lie down , and [he]_56-robbie slides [his]_56-robbie hand up [my]_2959-i top as [he]_56-robbie looks down at [me]_2959-i . “ Did [you]_56-robbie go to any job interviews this week ? ”_[56-robbie] [I]_2959-i ask . “ Nah , nothing suited [me]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ Any job is a good job . . . is n’t it ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask hopefully . “ [I]_56-robbie ’m waiting for the right one . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie kisses [me]_2959-i softly . [I]_2959-i stare up at [him]_56-robbie as [I]_2959-i feel [his]_56-robbie erection grow up against [my]_2959-i leg . “ [Robbie]_56-robbie , come back to [New York]_{385-new york} with [me]_56-robbie . There are so many jobs [there]_{385-new york} , and it would be a fresh start for [you]_56-robbie . [We]_2510-we could discover [the city]_{385-new york} together . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie snatches [his]_56-robbie hand away from [my]_2959-i breast and pulls away from [me]_2959-i . “ Do n’t start [your]_56-robbie fucking shit . [I]_56-robbie told [you]_56-robbie [I]_56-robbie ’m not moving to [New York]_{385-new york} . ”_[56-robbie] [I]_2959-i sit up in a rush . “ What ’s stopping [you]_56-robbie ? [You]_56-robbie have no job here . What ’s holding [you]_56-robbie back ? Explain it to [me]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_56-robbie like living here . [I]_56-robbie do n’t pay rent , and [[my]_56-robbie mother]_{356-my mother} cooks all [my]_56-robbie food . [I]_56-robbie have a good deal here . Why would [I]_56-robbie leave ? ”_[56-robbie] “ [You]_56-robbie ’re twenty - five , [Robbie]_56-robbie . ”_[2959-i] “ What ’s that supposed to mean ? ”_[2959-i] [he]_2959-i snaps . “ Do n’t [you]_56-robbie want to support [yourself]_56-robbie and experience something different ? ”_[2959-i] “ No . [I]_56-robbie like it here . ”_[56-robbie] “ [You]_56-robbie need to grow up , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap , and [we]_566-we both stand up . “ And [you]_56-robbie need to come back to fucking earth . [The world]_{249-the world} does n’t revolve around [you]_56-robbie . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i want to live in [New York]_{385-new york} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i take [his]_2959-i hand as [I]_2959-i try to get through to [him]_2959-i . “ [You]_56-robbie should see [New York]_{385-new york} , [Robbie]_56-robbie . [You]_56-robbie would love it [there]_{385-new york} . It has this vibe like [I]_2959-i ’ve never felt anywhere else . ”_[2959-i] “ [New York]_{385-new york} is [your]_56-robbie dream , [Emily]_186-jameson , not [mine]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i ’m never moving there . ”_[2959-i] Oh hell . [We]_567-we are [worlds apart]_{568-worlds apart} . “ How are [we]_567-we supposed to be together from [different sides of [the country]_{385-new york}]_{2513-different sides of the country} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask softly . [He]_2959-i shrugs . “ [You]_56-robbie should have thought of that before [you]_56-robbie applied for this stupid job . ”_[2959-i] “ It ’s not a stupid job . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i plead , “ Do n’t [you]_56-robbie want to support [me]_2959-i in [my]_2959-i dream ? Are [you]_56-robbie going to come and visit [me]_2959-i at all ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i told [you]_56-robbie — [I]_2959-i do n’t like [cities]_2514-cities . ”_[2959-i] “ So what [you]_56-robbie ’re saying is , if [I]_2959-i do n’t fly back to [California]_{12-california} , [I]_2959-i wo n’t see [you]_56-robbie at all . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i shrugs and sits down and picks up [his]_2959-i PlayStation remote . “ Are [you]_56-robbie serious ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap as [I]_2959-i begin to see red . “ [I]_2959-i flew all the way [home]_2289-home to discuss [our]_2516-our future , and [you]_56-robbie ’re going to play fucking Fortnite . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i rolls [his]_2959-i eyes and starts the game . “ Quit [your]_56-robbie nagging . ”_[2959-i] “ Quit [my]_2959-i nagging , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t want to live in [[[your]_56-robbie fucking parents]_{2517-your fucking parents} ’ garage]_{2518-your fucking parents ’ garage} , [Robbie]_56-robbie . ”_[2959-i] “ Do n’t , then . ”_[2959-i] “ What is wrong with [you]_56-robbie ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i cry in outrage . “ Why do [you]_56-robbie want to waste away here ? [You]_56-robbie ’re twenty - five , [Robbie]_56-robbie . [You]_56-robbie need to grow up . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i rolls [his]_2959-i eyes . “ If [you]_56-robbie flew all the way back here to be [a bitch]_{2519-a bitch} , [you]_56-robbie need n’t have bothered . ”_[113-steam] [Steam]_113-steam shoots from [my]_2959-i ears . “ If [I]_2959-i walk out that door , [Robbie]_56-robbie , [we]_2520-we are over , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say . [His]_2959-i eyes rise to meet [mine]_2959-i . “ [I]_2959-i mean it , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ [I]_2959-i want [you]_56-robbie in [my]_2959-i life , but [I]_2959-i wo n’t sacrifice [my]_2959-i happiness because [you]_56-robbie are too fucking lazy to get off [your]_56-robbie ass and make a future for [yourself]_56-robbie . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i clenches [his]_2959-i jaw and goes back to [his]_2959-i game . [He]_2959-i begins to play . [I]_2959-i watch [him]_2959-i through tears as [I]_2959-i hear [my]_2959-i angry heartbeat in [my]_2959-i ears . “ [Robbie]_56-robbie , please , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ Come with [me]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i keeps [his]_2959-i eyes on the screen as [he]_2959-i begins to shoot [people]_248-people in [his]_2959-i game . “ Close the door on [your]_56-robbie way out . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i puts [his]_2959-i headphones on to block [me]_2959-i out . [I]_2959-i get a lump in [my]_2959-i throat as [I]_2959-i finally see [our]_570-our relationship for what it really is . A sham . [I]_2959-i take a long look around [[his]_2959-i room]_{571-his room} as [he]_2959-i plays [his]_2959-i game , and [I]_2959-i know that this is it . The defining moment where [I]_2959-i decide what [I]_2959-i ’m worth . What [I]_2959-i want from life . [I]_2959-i ca n’t save [him]_2959-i . . . if [he]_2959-i does n’t want to be saved . What [I]_2959-i want is [someone who wants to grow with [me]_2959-i]_{572-someone who wants to grow with me} , and [I]_2959-i do n’t even know what growth [I]_2959-i want . But [I]_2959-i ca n’t be stagnant here in [[[his]_2959-i parents]_{2353-his parents} ’ garage]_{2354-his parents ’ garage} any longer . [I]_2959-i do n’t even know who [he]_2959-i is anymore . . . but this is n’t [me]_2959-i . [The woman [I]_2959-i want to be lives in [New York]_{385-new york}]_{575-the woman i want to be lives in new york} and has the job of [her]_{575-the woman i want to be lives in new york} dreams . Sadness overwhelms [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i know what [I]_2959-i have to do . [I]_2959-i walk over to [him]_2959-i and take [his]_2959-i headphones off . “ [I]_2959-i ’m going . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i stares at [me]_2959-i . “ [You]_2959-i ’re better than this , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [He]_2959-i clenches [his]_2959-i jaw . “ [Robbie]_56-robbie , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ [You]_2959-i ’re much more than just [a football star]_{2521-a football star} . [You]_2959-i need to believe that . ”_[2959-i] [His]_2959-i eyes search [mine]_2959-i . “ Go and get some help . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i look around [[his]_2959-i room]_{571-his room} . “ It ’s going to be too late for [us]_2522-us , but [I]_2959-i want it for [you]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i drops [his]_2959-i head and stares at the floor . [I]_2959-i take [his]_2959-i hand in [mine]_2959-i . “ Come with [me]_2959-i , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ Please , [Robbie]_56-robbie , pull out of this . . . if not for [me]_2959-i , for [yourself]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i ca n’t , [Em]_2523-em . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes fill with tears , and [I]_2959-i bend and kiss [him]_2959-i softly one last time . [I]_2959-i rub [my]_2959-i fingers through [his]_2959-i stubble and stare into [his]_2959-i eyes . “ Go and find whatever it is that makes [you]_2959-i happy , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ [You]_2959-i too , ”_[2959-i] [he]_2959-i breathes sadly . [I]_2959-i realize [he]_2959-i does n’t even want to fight it ; [he]_2959-i knows this is for the best . [I]_2959-i smile at the bittersweet moment , and [I]_2959-i kiss [him]_2959-i softly , with tears rolling down [my]_2959-i cheeks . [I]_2959-i get into [[[my]_2959-i mother]_{356-my mother} ’s car]_{578-my mother ’s car} and stare at [[his]_2959-i house]_{369-the car} for an extended time . That was much easier and much harder than [I]_2959-i imagined . [I]_2959-i slowly start [the car]_{369-the car} and pull out onto [the road]_{533-the road} . [I]_2959-i wipe [my]_2959-i tears with [my]_2959-i forearm as [I]_2959-i feel a chapter of [my]_2959-i life close . [I]_2959-i drive down [the road]_{533-the road} and out of [Robbie McIntyre]_56-robbie ’s life . “ Goodbye , [Robbie]_56-robbie , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper out loud . “ When it was good , it was great . ”_[2959-i] Monday morning “ And what do [you]_56-robbie think would happen if [you]_56-robbie told the police of [your]_56-robbie suspicions ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ Nothing . Nothing at all , ”_{[581-the frail old woman]} [the frail old woman]_{581-the frail old woman} replies . [She]_{581-the frail old woman} has to be at least ninety . [Her]_{581-the frail old woman} white hair is in perfect finger waves , and [her]_{581-the frail old woman} dress is a pretty shade of mauve . “ [They]_2524-they ’re useless . ”_{[581-the frail old woman]} [I]_2959-i dutifully scribble down [her]_{581-the frail old woman} reply on [my]_2959-i notepad . [I]_2959-i ’m out in [the field]_{582-the field} today , following up [my]_2959-i own lead . There has been a string of satanic graffiti on the fronts of [houses]_583-houses lately , and [[this particular woman]_{581-the frail old woman} ’s house]_{584-this particular woman ’s house} has been done three times . Fed up with the lack of support from [the police department]_{585-the police department} , [she]_{581-the frail old woman} contacted [Miles Media]_{68-miles media} , and [I]_2959-i was the lucky one who picked up the phone . “ So . . . tell [me]_2959-i when this all began , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ Back in November . ”_{[581-the frail old woman]} [She]_{581-the frail old woman} pauses as [she]_{581-the frail old woman} tries to remember . “ November sixteenth was the first time . A huge mural of the devil [himself]_2525-himself . ”_{[581-the frail old woman]} “ Right . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i look up from [my]_2959-i notes . “ What did it look like ? ”_[2959-i] “ Evil . ”_{[581-the frail old woman]} [She]_{581-the frail old woman} gets a faraway look in [her]_{581-the frail old woman} eye . “ Pure evil , so lifelike , with huge fangs and blood dripping everywhere . ”_{[581-the frail old woman]} “ It must have been terrifying for [you]_2526-you . ”_[2959-i] “ It was . That was the night when [a jewelry store]_{2527-a jewelry store} got robbed around the corner , so [I]_2959-i remember it well . ”_[2959-i] “ Oh . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . [She]_{581-the frail old woman} did n’t mention this before . “ Do [you]_2526-you think it ’s related ? ”_{[581-the frail old woman]} [She]_{581-the frail old woman} stares at [me]_2959-i blankly . “ The graffiti and the robbery , [I]_2959-i mean , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i clarify . “ Do n’t know . ”_{[581-the frail old woman]} [She]_{581-the frail old woman} pauses for a moment and then contorts [her]_{581-the frail old woman} face as if in pain . “ [I]_{581-the frail old woman} ’ve never thought of that before , but it ’s all making sense now . [The police]_{368-the police} are in on this conspiracy . ”_{[581-the frail old woman]} [She]_{581-the frail old woman} begins to pace . “ Yes , yes , that ’s it . ”_{[581-the frail old woman]} [She]_{581-the frail old woman} taps [her]_{581-the frail old woman} hand on the top of [her]_{581-the frail old woman} head as [she]_{581-the frail old woman} walks back and forth . Hmm . There ’s something off here . Is [this woman of sound mind]_{581-the frail old woman} ? “ What did [you]_2526-you do when [you]_2526-you found the graffiti on [[your]_2526-you house]_{579-my house} ? ”_{[581-the frail old woman]} “ [I]_{581-the frail old woman} called [the police]_{368-the police} , and [they]_{368-the police} told [me]_{581-the frail old woman} that [they]_{368-the police} do n’t have time to come out for graffiti but to take a picture of it and email it to [them]_{368-the police} . ”_{[581-the frail old woman]} “ And [you]_2526-you did that ? ”_{[581-the frail old woman]} “ Yes . ”_{[581-the frail old woman]} “ What happened then ? ”_{[581-the frail old woman]} “ [[My]_{581-the frail old woman} son]_{2504-my son} got [[my]_{581-the frail old woman} house]_{579-my house} acid washed and removed it , but three nights later it happened again . But this time it was an image of [someone getting murdered]_{2531-someone getting murdered} . [A woman]_{339-a woman} had been stabbed . The graffiti was so intricate that it looked like a painting . ”_{[581-the frail old woman]} “ Oh . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i continue to take notes . “ What did [you]_2526-you do this time ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_{581-the frail old woman} went down to [the police station]_{2533-the police station} and demanded [someone]_2326-someone come and look at [[my]_{581-the frail old woman} house]_{579-my house} . [[My]_{581-the frail old woman} neighbor]_{2535-my neighbor} had [[his]_2959-i house]_{579-my house} vandalized too . ”_{[581-the frail old woman]} “ Okay . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i scribble down [her]_586-her story . “ What ’s [[your]_2526-you neighbor]_{2535-my neighbor} ’s name ? ”_[2959-i] “ Robert Day Daniels . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i glance up from [my]_2959-i notes , surprised by [his]_2959-i name . “ [His]_2959-i name is [Robert Day Daniels]_{114-robert day daniels} ? ”_[2959-i] “ Or is it [Daniel Day Roberts]_{115-daniel day roberts} ? ”_[586-her] [Her]_586-her voice trails off as [she]_586-her thinks . “ Hmm . ”_[586-her] [I]_2959-i stare at [her]_586-her as [I]_2959-i wait for [her]_586-her to decide which it is . “ [I]_586-her forgot [his]_2959-i name . ”_[586-her] [She]_586-her scrubs [her]_586-her hands in [her]_586-her hair as if about to launch into a panic . “ That ’s okay . [I]_586-her ’ll just write [Robert Day Daniels]_{114-robert day daniels} for the moment , and then [we]_2536-we ’ll come back to it a little later . ”_[586-her] “ Yes , okay . ”_[586-her] [She]_586-her smiles , pleased that [I]_2959-i ’m not pushing [her]_586-her for an exact name . “ What was drawn on [[his]_2959-i house]_{2537-the entire house} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ One of those horrible devil stars . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_586-her see . Tell [me]_586-her , what did [the police]_{368-the police} do this time ? ”_[586-her] “ Nothing . [They]_{368-the police} did n’t even come out here . ”_[2959-i] “ [They]_{368-the police} ’re very busy , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reassure [her]_586-her as [I]_2959-i write . “ Tell [me]_2959-i about the last time it happened . ”_[2959-i] “ [The entire house]_{2537-the entire house} was painted red . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i glance up in surprise . “ [The entire house]_{2537-the entire house} was red ? ”_[2959-i] “ [The whole street]_{2539-the whole street} . ”_[2959-i] Uneasiness sweeps over [me]_2959-i . “ That is weird . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . [She]_586-her leans in close so that only [I]_2959-i can hear [her]_586-her . “ Do [you]_586-her think it ’s [the devil]_{2540-the devil} ? ”_[586-her] [she]_586-her whispers . “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . “ No , it ’s probably just [kids]_2541-kids acting up , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say , trying to reassure [her]_586-her . “ Have [you]_586-her told [anyone else]_{527-anyone else} about this ? ”_[2959-i] “ No , only [Miles Media]_{14-miles media} . [I]_2959-i want [you]_586-her to publish this story so that [the police]_{368-the police} will actually pay some attention . [I]_2959-i ’m getting scared that it ’s something more sinister . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i take [her]_586-her hand in [mine]_2959-i . “ Yes , [I]_2959-i think [we]_2544-we have enough to go forward with the story . ”_[2959-i] “ Oh , thank [you]_2959-i , [dear]_2959-i . ”_[586-her] [She]_586-her holds [my]_2959-i hand tightly . “ Is there anything else [you]_2959-i can think of that may be relevant ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ Just that [I]_2959-i ’m living in fear every night that [the devil]_{2540-the devil} is coming back . [[My]_2959-i neighbors]_{2546-my neighbors} said to go and speak to [them]_{2546-my neighbors} too . ”_[2959-i] “ Okay , great . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i hand [her]_586-her [my]_2959-i card . “ If [you]_2959-i think of anything else , please call [me]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] “ Yes , [I]_586-her will . ”_[586-her] [She]_586-her clutches the card . [I]_2959-i go down [the street]_{550-the street} and interview [seven more people]_{588-seven more people} , and the stories all correlate . [I]_2959-i definitely have enough evidence to go forward . [I]_2959-i go back to [the office]_{385-new york} and type the story up and hand it in to [Hayden]_266-jim . It feels good breaking news . [I]_2959-i sit at [my]_2959-i desk and stare at [my]_2959-i computer screen . It ’s four o’clock on Monday , and [I]_2959-i ’m in a funk . Since [I]_2959-i got back to [New York]_{385-new york} late last night , [I]_2959-i ’ve had a bad case of the guilts . Even though [I]_2959-i knew that [Robbie]_56-robbie and [I]_2959-i were reaching [our]_590-we expiration date , [I]_2959-i kind of feel like [I]_2959-i sped it up and did n’t let it run its course . But then , on the other hand , [we]_590-we ’d been stagnant for months , and if [I]_2959-i took this job knowing [he]_56-robbie was n’t coming with [me]_2959-i . . . [I]_2959-i think [I]_2959-i subconsciously knew [we]_590-we were close to the end . “ [The god]_{2547-the god} is here , ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron whispers . [I]_2959-i glance up . “ Who ? ”_[0-aaron] “ [Tristan Miles]_2430-tristan , ”_[0-aaron] [he]_0-aaron whispers . [I]_2959-i spy over the screening above [my]_2959-i desk as [he]_0-aaron talks to [the manager of the floor]_{591-the manager of the floor} , [Rebecca]_116-rebecca . [He]_0-aaron ’s wearing a pin - striped navy suit , [his]_0-aaron brown wavy hair is in just - fucked perfection , and [he]_0-aaron has this dreamy smile on [his]_0-aaron face as [he]_0-aaron talks . [He]_0-aaron has the whitest teeth [I]_2959-i ’ve ever seen and huge dimples . “ [She]_116-rebecca ’s giggling like [a schoolgirl]_{2548-a schoolgirl} . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron frowns . “ [He]_0-aaron ’s never on this level , ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly says . “ What do [you]_198-molly reckon [he]_0-aaron ’s doing here ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron whispers as [his]_0-aaron eyes stay glued to the fine specimen . “ [His]_0-aaron job , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reply flatly . “ [He]_0-aaron does work here , [you]_198-molly know . ”_[2959-i] The more [I]_2959-i think about it , the more [I]_2959-i know [I]_2959-i ’ve romanticized this whole Jameson Miles thing . [He]_0-aaron does n’t like [me]_2959-i — [he]_0-aaron ’s just horny , and there ’s a big difference . [He]_0-aaron ’s probably had sex with [five women]_{592-five women} since Friday night when [I]_2959-i spoke to [him]_0-aaron . [I]_2959-i have n’t heard from [him]_0-aaron since , and [I]_2959-i do n’t want to either . [I]_2959-i did n’t leave [Robbie]_56-robbie because [Jameson]_186-jameson told [me]_2959-i to ; [I]_2959-i left [Robbie]_56-robbie because [he]_0-aaron ’d stopped putting in any effort . If [Jameson]_186-jameson knows [we]_593-we broke up , [he]_0-aaron ’s going to assume it ’s because [I]_2959-i want to sleep with [him]_0-aaron . . . and [I]_2959-i do n’t . [I]_2959-i really do n’t . [Stupid men]_{594-stupid men} . [I]_2959-i ’m not telling [my]_2959-i coworkers that [we]_593-we broke up . [I]_2959-i do n’t want to make a fanfare of it . [I]_2959-i want to take [my]_2959-i time to get [my]_2959-i head around it . [Tristan Miles]_2430-tristan says something , and [Rebecca]_116-rebecca laughs . Then [he]_0-aaron disappears into [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} , and [we]_593-we all get back to work . [I]_2959-i struggle with [my]_2959-i umbrella as [I]_2959-i trudge down the pavement in the rain . [New York]_{385-new york} is n’t as dreamy in the wet . [I]_2959-i grab [the Gazette]_{596-the gazette} while [I]_2959-i ’m waiting for the lights to change and stuff it in [my]_2959-i bag . [I]_2959-i ’ll read this while [I]_2959-i wait for [my]_2959-i coffee . [My]_2959-i phone rings . “ Hello , [Emily Foster]_186-jameson speaking , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i answer as [I]_2959-i power walk among [the crowd]_{265-the crowd} . “ Hello , [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] a familiar voice says . [I]_2959-i frown , unable to place who it is . “ Who ’s speaking , please ? ”_[2959-i] “ This is [Marjorie]_198-molly . [We]_2549-we spoke yesterday . ”_{[598-the graffiti lady]} Oh shit — [the graffiti lady]_{598-the graffiti lady} . “ Oh yes , hello , [Marjorie]_198-molly . It ’s a bad line , and [I]_2959-i could n’t hear [you]_{598-the graffiti lady} properly , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i lie . “ It ’s [Danny Rupert]_{117-danny rupert} , ”_{[598-the graffiti lady]} [she]_{598-the graffiti lady} replies . “ [I]_2959-i ’m sorry ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ [[My]_2959-i neighbor]_{2535-my neighbor} ’s name is [Danny Rupert]_{117-danny rupert} . [I]_2959-i could n’t remember it yesterday . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i screw up [my]_2959-i face and cringe . Oh God . [I]_2959-i hope it has n’t gone to print . [I]_2959-i completely forgot to go back to it . Panic begins to swirl in [my]_2959-i stomach . Shit . “ [I]_2959-i think the story has already gone to print , [Marjorie]_198-molly . [I]_2959-i ’m so sorry [I]_2959-i did n’t recheck it with [you]_0-aaron . ”_[2959-i] “ Oh , that ’s okay , [dear]_0-aaron . It does n’t matter — no harm done . [I]_2959-i felt foolish being unable to remember , and [I]_2959-i wanted to call [you]_0-aaron . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i stomach rolls . It does matter — [you]_0-aaron do n’t get names wrong in a story . Reporting 101 . Fuck . [I]_2959-i puff air into [my]_2959-i cheeks as disappointment in [myself]_2959-i runs through [me]_2959-i . Damn it . This is not a little mistake ; it ’s a major fuckup . “ Thanks for the call , [Marjorie]_198-molly . [I]_2959-i ’ll call [you]_0-aaron when [I]_2959-i get into [the office]_{385-new york} and let [you]_0-aaron know when it ’s running . ”_[2959-i] With any luck it wo n’t be until tomorrow , and [I]_2959-i will have time to change it . [I]_2959-i hang up and internally kick [myself]_2959-i . Damn it . Focus . [I]_2959-i walk into the café opposite [the Miles Media building]_{521-the miles media building} and order [my]_2959-i coffee . [I]_2959-i drag the paper out of [my]_2959-i bag and slam it onto the table . [I]_2959-i am not going to hold on to this job with sloppy mistakes like that . [I]_2959-i ’m so annoyed at [myself]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i flick through the paper , and then something catches [my]_2959-i eye . Satanic Graffiti in [New York]_{385-new york} A spate of bizarre graffiti attacks on houses in the [West Village]_{18-west village} has [the residents]_{601-the residents} running scared . [[Marjorie Bishop]_0-aaron ’s house]_{602-marjorie bishop ’s house} has been graffitied three times , and [the police]_{368-the police} are refusing to take action . [Another resident]_{604-another resident} , [Robert Day Daniels]_{114-robert day daniels} , has been suffering too . [I]_2959-i frown as [I]_2959-i read the story . What ? [Marjorie]_0-aaron said [she]_0-aaron did n’t tell [anyone]_272-anyone about this other than [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i read it again and again . It quotes [my]_2959-i story almost word for word , and each time [I]_2959-i get more confused . Did [she]_0-aaron tell [another reporter the same wrong name]_{606-another reporter the same wrong name} ? [I]_2959-i take out [my]_2959-i phone and dial [her]_0-aaron number , and [she]_0-aaron answers on the first ring . “ Hello , [Marjorie]_0-aaron , this is [Emily Foster]_186-jameson . ”_[0-aaron] “ Oh hello , [dear]_0-aaron ; that was quick . ”_[0-aaron] “ [Marjorie]_0-aaron , did [you]_0-aaron speak to [anyone else]_{527-anyone else} from another paper about this graffiti story ? ”_[0-aaron] “ No , [dear]_0-aaron . ”_[0-aaron] “ [You]_0-aaron have n’t told [anyone]_272-anyone ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ Not a soul . [The street]_{550-the street} and [I]_2959-i made a collective decision that [we]_2555-we only wanted [Miles Media]_{68-miles media} to report on [it]_{68-miles media} . That way [we]_2555-we knew [the police]_{368-the police} would have to listen . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i begin to hear [my]_2959-i heartbeat in [my]_2959-i ears . What the hell is going on ? “ Coffee for [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] the cashier calls . “ Thank [you]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i take [my]_2959-i coffee and head back out into the rain , confused as all hell . It ’s one o’clock , and [I]_2959-i ’m on [my]_2959-i lunch break . [I]_2959-i arrive at [the top floor]_{607-the top floor} and walk through to reception . “ Hello . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile nervously . “ [I]_2959-i ’m here to see [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} . It ’s an urgent matter . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ’ve been racking [my]_2959-i brain all day , and the only theory [I]_2959-i can come up with is n’t pretty . [I]_2959-i need to talk to [Jameson]_186-jameson . [The blonde receptionist]_{608-the blonde receptionist} smiles . “ Just a moment , please . [Your]_186-jameson name is ? ”_{[608-the blonde receptionist]} “ [Emily Foster]_186-jameson . ”_{[608-the blonde receptionist]} [She]_{608-the blonde receptionist} pushes the intercom . “ [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} , [I]_{608-the blonde receptionist} have an [Emily Foster]_186-jameson here to see [you]_186-jameson . ”_{[608-the blonde receptionist]} “ Send [her]_{608-the blonde receptionist} in , ”_{[186-jameson]} [his]_186-jameson velvety voice purrs without hesitation . [I]_2959-i feel [my]_2959-i stomach dip with nerves , and [I]_2959-i follow [her]_{608-the blonde receptionist} out into [the corridor]_{609-the corridor} and across [the marble]_{610-the marble} . Damn it , [I]_2959-i still have n’t bought rubber - soled shoes yet . [I]_2959-i try to tiptoe so [I]_2959-i do n’t click as [I]_2959-i walk . “ Just knock on the end door . ”_[2959-i] Holy shit . [My]_2959-i heart begins to pump , and [I]_2959-i force a smile . “ Thank [you]_2959-i . ”_{[608-the blonde receptionist]} [She]_{608-the blonde receptionist} disappears up [the hall]_{611-the hall} , and [I]_2959-i close [my]_2959-i eyes as [I]_2959-i stand in front of the door , bracing [myself]_2959-i . Okay , here goes . Knock , knock , knock . “ Come in , ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i hear [Jameson]_186-jameson call . [I]_2959-i scrunch [my]_2959-i eyes shut as nerves dance deep in [my]_2959-i stomach . [I]_2959-i open the door , and there [he]_186-jameson sits in a navy suit . With [his]_186-jameson white shirt , dark hair , and piercing blue eyes , [he]_186-jameson looks like [God]_0-aaron ’s gift to [women]_276-women . Maybe [he]_186-jameson is . “ Hello , [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson whispers as [his]_186-jameson sexy eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ Hello . ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson stands and stares at [me]_2959-i . [Our]_613-our eyes are locked , and the air swirls between [us]_613-our . “ Please , take a seat . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i fall into the chair , and [he]_186-jameson sits behind [his]_186-jameson desk and leans back in [his]_186-jameson chair ; [his]_186-jameson eyes do n’t leave [me]_2959-i . “ [I]_2959-i wanted to see [you]_186-jameson about something , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say as [I]_2959-i glance at the glass of scotch beside [him]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i do n’t know what kind of work has scotch involved , but where ’s [my]_2959-i glass ? [I]_2959-i could do with a drink or ten right now . [He]_186-jameson sits back and smirks as if amused . “ Umm . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i pause and swallow the sand in [my]_2959-i throat . “ So something has happened , and [I]_2959-i know [I]_2959-i could get into trouble for it , but [I]_2959-i feel like [you]_186-jameson need to know , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i blurt out in a rush . “ Such as ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_186-jameson got a name wrong in a story . ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s unimpressed eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ But it ’s the weirdest thing , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer . “ Today the Gazette has published the same story . . . with [my]_186-jameson error in it . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson frowns . “ What ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Look , [I]_2959-i do n’t know , and [I]_2959-i could be totally wrong , and [I]_2959-i do n’t know why [I]_2959-i ’m even telling [you]_186-jameson this , but [I]_2959-i think . . . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pause . “ [You]_186-jameson think what ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson snaps . “ [I]_2959-i just know for certain that [the Gazette]_{596-the gazette} did n’t get that story [themselves]_{596-the gazette} , and [they]_{596-the gazette} most definitely could n’t make the same mistake as [I]_2959-i have . [The old lady in the story]_{2558-the old lady in the story} contacted [me]_2959-i directly because [she]_{2558-the old lady in the story} would only talk to [Miles Media]_{68-miles media} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i put the Gazette down on the desk in front of [him]_186-jameson , and [he]_186-jameson reads it and stares at [me]_2959-i for a moment as if processing [my]_2959-i words . “ Are [you]_{2558-the old lady in the story} sure ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Positive . [I]_2959-i got the name wrong . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i point to the name where [my]_2959-i mistake was made . “ This here is [my]_186-jameson error . ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson brushes [his]_186-jameson thumb back and forth over [his]_186-jameson bottom lip as [he]_186-jameson stares at the paper before [him]_186-jameson , deep in thought . “ Thank [you]_{2558-the old lady in the story} . [I]_186-jameson ’ll discuss this with [Tristan]_2430-tristan and get back to [you]_{2558-the old lady in the story} . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Okay . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stand . “ [I]_2959-i ’m sorry for making the error . It was unprofessional , and it wo n’t happen again . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes go to [Jameson]_186-jameson , and [I]_2959-i wait for [him]_186-jameson to say something . Is that it ? “ Goodbye , [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson says flatly . Oh , [he]_186-jameson ’s dismissing [me]_2959-i . “ Goodbye . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i turn , feeling dejected , and make [my]_2959-i way [downstairs]_{2454-downstairs} . [I]_2959-i do n’t know whether [I]_2959-i just did the right thing by telling [him]_186-jameson [my]_2959-i theory . Maybe it will only work against [me]_2959-i . It ’s four o’clock , and [I]_2959-i ’m drinking [my]_2959-i afternoon coffee . [My]_2959-i phone rings , and [I]_2959-i answer it . “ Hello . ”_[2959-i] “ Hello , [Emily]_186-jameson , this is [Sammia]_246-alan . [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} would like to see [you]_186-jameson in [[his]_186-jameson office]_{426-his office} , please . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ Now ? ”_[2959-i] “ Yes , please . ”_[2959-i] “ Okay . [I]_2959-i ’m on [my]_2959-i way up . ”_[2959-i] Ten minutes later , [I]_2959-i knock on [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s door . “ Come in , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson calls . [I]_2959-i walk in and find [him]_186-jameson sitting behind [his]_186-jameson large desk . [His]_186-jameson face breaks into a sexy smile as [his]_186-jameson eyes find [mine]_2959-i . “ Hello . ”_{[186-jameson]} [My]_2959-i stomach dances with nerves . “ Hi . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Have [you]_2959-i had a good day ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson asks , and in slow motion [I]_2959-i watch as [his]_186-jameson tongue swipes over [his]_186-jameson bottom lip . [He]_186-jameson ’s different this afternoon . [He]_186-jameson has a playful air about [him]_186-jameson . “ [You]_2959-i wanted to see [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ Yes , [I]_186-jameson ’ve spoken to [Tristan]_2430-tristan , and [we]_2560-we have a special project that [we]_2560-we would like [you]_2959-i to work on , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson says as [he]_186-jameson leans back in [his]_186-jameson chair . “ [You]_2959-i do ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Yes . [We]_2560-we want [you]_2959-i to write a story to publish . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i swallow the lump in [my]_2959-i throat . “ Okay . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug . “ What ’s the story on ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson narrows [his]_186-jameson eyes as [he]_186-jameson thinks . “ [I]_186-jameson was thinking . . . something along the lines of lovebites . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i frown in confusion . “ Love bites ? ”_[2959-i] Amusement flashes across [his]_186-jameson face as if [he]_186-jameson ’s trying to keep it straight . “ [Lovebites]_{119-lovebites} , one word . [Plural]_120-plural . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_186-jameson for a moment in confusion . [I]_2959-i do n’t get it . Oh [my]_2959-i God . [He]_186-jameson ’s talking about the hickey [I]_2959-i gave [him]_186-jameson . Of all the nerve . Trust [him]_186-jameson to bring that up . [I]_2959-i tilt [my]_2959-i chin to the sky in defiance . “ [I]_2959-i think [I]_2959-i ’m better equipped to write a story on premature ejaculation . That way [you]_2561-you could help [me]_2959-i with it . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile sweetly . [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s eyes dance with delight . “ Is that so ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Yes , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reply straight faced . “ News stories are so much better when [they]_2562-they have evidence to back [them]_2562-they up . ”_{[121-amusement]} [Amusement]_{121-amusement} crosses [his]_186-jameson face as [he]_186-jameson sips [his]_186-jameson scotch . [I]_2959-i have no idea what ’s going through that head of [his]_186-jameson this afternoon . Maybe [he]_186-jameson ’s had too many scotches . [We]_615-we stare at each other , and [I]_2959-i want to blurt out , “ Did [you]_2563-you ever think of [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] But [I]_2959-i ca n’t because this is work , and [I]_2959-i ’m acting uninterested . Actually , let [me]_2959-i rephrase that . [I]_2959-i ’m not interested — [I’m]_2959-i slightly fascinated . Huge difference . “ How was [your]_2563-you weekend ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson asks . “ Fine . ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson eyebrow rises . “ Just fine ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i nod . “ Uh - huh . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i do n’t want to tell [him]_186-jameson that [I]_2959-i broke up with [Robbie]_56-robbie , but then [I]_2959-i do n’t want to lie to [him]_186-jameson either . “ [You]_186-jameson got back Sunday night ? ”_[2959-i] “ Yes . ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson eyes hold [mine]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i know [he]_186-jameson wants to ask about [Robbie]_56-robbie and [me]_2959-i but is holding [his]_186-jameson tongue . “ How was [your]_186-jameson weekend ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ Great , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson replies as [his]_186-jameson eyes drop to [my]_2959-i lips . “ [I]_2959-i had a great weekend . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . Does great mean just generally great , or does great mean “ [I]_186-jameson had great hot sex with [a gorgeous , great woman all weekend ”]_{2564-a gorgeous , great woman all weekend ”[186-jameson]} ? Stop it . “ Sorry about that , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan says as [he]_186-jameson breezes into [the room]_{514-the room} . [He]_186-jameson smiles warmly and shakes [my]_2959-i hand . “ [I]_186-jameson ’m [Tristan]_2430-tristan . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson ’s slightly younger than [Jameson]_186-jameson , and [his]_186-jameson hair is a lighter brown and has a curl to it . [His]_186-jameson eyes are big and brown . [He]_186-jameson ’s very different from [Jameson]_186-jameson but has that same power thing going on . “ [I]_186-jameson ’m [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ Hello , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson and [Jameson]_186-jameson make eye contact , and at that moment , [I]_2959-i know that [he]_186-jameson knows [Jameson]_186-jameson and [my]_2959-i history together . [I]_2959-i swallow the nervous lump in [my]_2959-i throat . Why would [he]_186-jameson have told [[his]_186-jameson brother]_56-robbie about [me]_2959-i ? [Tristan]_2430-tristan glances at [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s scotch . “ What time is it ? Has happy hour started ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ Four thirty , and yes , ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson replies . [Tristan]_2430-tristan goes to [the bar]_{459-the bar} and pours [himself]_186-jameson a glass of the amber liquid . [He]_186-jameson holds a glass up . “ Would [you]_2565-you like a drink , [Emily]_186-jameson ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ No thanks . [I]_2959-i ’m working , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reply nervously . Amusement crosses [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s face as [he]_186-jameson lifts [his]_186-jameson drink to [his]_186-jameson lips . Okay , what the hell is that look ? Is it a condescending smirk or nearly a smile ? [I]_2959-i ca n’t read [this man]_56-robbie at all . [Jameson]_186-jameson sits still and stares at [me]_2959-i . [Our]_619-we eyes are locked , and the air swirls between [us]_619-we . “ [You]_620-you wanted to see [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . [I]_2959-i really do n’t know what kind of meeting has scotch involved . Maybe [I]_2959-i should have had a glass . [God]_0-aaron , no . Remember what [you]_620-you did last time [you]_620-you got drunk with [this man]_56-robbie . [You]_620-you tried to suck all the blood out of [him]_56-robbie . “ As [we]_619-we just discussed , [we]_619-we have a special project [we]_619-we would like [you]_620-you to work on , ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson says . [I]_2959-i nod as [I]_2959-i look between [them]_621-them . “ Yes . In light of what [you]_620-you told [me]_2959-i this morning , [we]_619-we want [you]_620-you to write a story for [us]_619-we to publish . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i swallow the lump in [my]_2959-i throat . “ Okay . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i look between [them]_621-them . “ What ’s the story on ? ”_[2959-i] “ Name a subject . ”_[2959-i] [His]_2959-i tongue slips out and runs across [his]_2959-i bottom lip , and [I]_2959-i feel it all the way to [my]_2959-i toes . “ [We]_619-we have a secret project coming up , and [I]_2959-i wanted [you]_620-you to be involved , but [I]_2959-i need to know if [you]_620-you can report on a subject . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_620-you know [I]_2959-i can . [I]_2959-i ’ve worked for regional papers for five years as [a reporter]_{2566-a reporter} . ”_[2959-i] “ This is strictly off the record , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan says . “ [You]_620-you can not tell a soul . It ’s imperative . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ [I]_2959-i wo n’t , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say as [I]_2959-i look between [them]_621-them . “ For some time , [we]_619-we have thought that [somebody]_251-somebody on [your]_620-you floor is selling [our]_619-we stories to [[our]_619-we competitors]_{2568-our competitors} so that [they]_{2568-our competitors} are breaking before [us]_619-we . What [you]_620-you told [us]_619-we this morning all but confirms it . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ How do [you]_620-you know ? ”_[2959-i] “ Trust [me]_186-jameson ; [we]_619-we know , ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson replies . “ [Our]_619-we stocks are falling and so is [our]_619-we credibility . It needs to stop . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown as [I]_2959-i listen . “ [We]_619-we want [you]_620-you to make up a fake news story and submit it through the normal channels , and [we]_619-we will see if it turns up in [our]_619-we competitor ’s papers . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_186-jameson as [I]_2959-i try to get [my]_2959-i brain to keep up . “ What would [I]_2959-i write about ? ”_[2959-i] “ Something worth selling . It does n’t have to be real . [The faker]_{2569-the faker} the better — then it ’s more easily traceable . ”_[2959-i] “ Who do [you]_620-you think it is ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask as excitement runs through [me]_2959-i . This is [my]_2959-i chance . If [I]_2959-i do well here , [I]_2959-i can prove [myself]_2959-i as [a valuable employee]_{622-a valuable employee} . Imagine if [I]_2959-i cracked the case . [I]_2959-i bite [my]_2959-i bottom lip to hide [my]_2959-i smile . [I]_2959-i need to act as if exciting things like this happen to [me]_2959-i every day . “ [We]_2570-we have no idea , but [we]_2570-we know it ’s not [you]_2571-you . ”_[2959-i] “ How do [you]_2571-you know that ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Because it began before [you]_2571-you started , ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson says as [he]_186-jameson stands and goes to [the bar]_{459-the bar} . “ Okay . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i think for a moment . “ [I]_2959-i could do that . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i look between [them]_624-them . “ When do [you]_2571-you want the story by ? ”_[2959-i] “ Tomorrow afternoon , if possible . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Okay . ”_[2959-i] A voice comes through the intercom . “ [Tristan]_2430-tristan , [you]_2571-you have [London]_6-london on line two . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson stands and pushes the button . “ Give [me]_186-jameson a moment to get back to [[my]_186-jameson office]_{455-my office} . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Okay , ”_{[625-the receptionist]} [the receptionist]_{625-the receptionist} answers . “ Sorry , [I]_186-jameson have to take this call . [We]_2573-we are settling today on a new company . [We]_2573-we ’ll talk more tomorrow afternoon , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson says . “ Sure . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . Oh , [I]_2959-i like [him]_186-jameson . [He]_186-jameson ’s friendlier than [[his]_186-jameson brother]_{617-his brother} . [He]_186-jameson shakes [my]_2959-i hand . “ Remember , not a word to [anyone]_272-anyone . [I]_186-jameson would hate to have to fire [you]_272-anyone . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson gives [me]_2959-i a playful wink , but something tells [me]_2959-i [he]_186-jameson ’s not joking . [I]_2959-i frown . What the hell ? “ Okay . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_186-jameson look forward to reading [your]_272-anyone story , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson says . [He]_186-jameson turns and walks out of [the office]_{385-new york} and closes the door behind [him]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i turn to [Jameson]_186-jameson . [His]_186-jameson eyes are dark , and [he]_186-jameson ’s holding [his]_186-jameson glass of scotch . [He]_186-jameson sips it in slow motion , and [I]_2959-i smile nervously as [my]_2959-i heart begins to race . [He]_186-jameson raises [his]_186-jameson eyebrow and sips [his]_186-jameson scotch again . The electricity in the air between [us]_628-us is palpable . “ [I]_2959-i should get back to [my]_2959-i desk , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [His]_186-jameson eyes stay fixed on [me]_2959-i as if [he]_186-jameson wants to say something , but [he]_186-jameson remains silent . “ Is there anything else [you]_2575-you wanted , [sir]_186-jameson ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i whisper as [I]_2959-i stand . [He]_186-jameson puts [his]_186-jameson drink down on the desk and walks toward [me]_2959-i . “ Yes , actually . There is . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson stops in front of [me]_2959-i so that [our]_628-us faces are only an inch apart , and [I]_2959-i stare up at [him]_186-jameson . [His]_186-jameson close proximity steals [my]_2959-i breath , and like a wave in [the ocean]_{629-the ocean} , arousal swims between [us]_628-us . “ Can [you]_2576-you feel that ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson breathes . [I]_2959-i nod because it ’s undeniable . “ [I]_186-jameson ’m so sexually attracted to [you]_2576-you that it ’s insane , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson whispers . “ From the first moment [I]_186-jameson saw [you]_2576-you on [that plane]_{2577-that plane} . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_186-jameson as [I]_2959-i get a vision of [him]_186-jameson throwing [me]_2959-i across [his]_186-jameson desk . [He]_186-jameson trails [his]_186-jameson index finger down [my]_2959-i face , over the center of [my]_2959-i chest between [my]_2959-i breasts , and then lower to [my]_2959-i stomach , and then [he]_186-jameson skims it over [my]_2959-i pubic bone before resting [his]_186-jameson hand on [my]_2959-i hip . “ [I]_186-jameson have a request . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Yes . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i close [my]_2959-i eyes as [I]_2959-i feel [myself]_2959-i melt under [his]_186-jameson touch . [He]_186-jameson leans forward so that [his]_186-jameson lips are almost touching [my]_2959-i ear . [His]_186-jameson breath tickles and sends goose bumps down [my]_2959-i spine . “ [I]_186-jameson want [you]_186-jameson to wear [your]_186-jameson gray skirt tomorrow , the one with the split . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i frown as [I]_2959-i listen to [his]_186-jameson whispered words . “ [Your]_186-jameson white silk blouse , and the lace bra that [you]_186-jameson wear underneath it . ”_[2959-i] Holy shit . . . “ No stockings . ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson hand grips [my]_2959-i hip bone , and [I]_2959-i clench [my]_2959-i sex . [He]_186-jameson licks [my]_2959-i ear . “ [I]_186-jameson want [you]_186-jameson to wear [your]_186-jameson hair in a ponytail so [I]_186-jameson can wrap it around [my]_186-jameson hand . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i get a vision of [him]_186-jameson wrapping [my]_2959-i ponytail around [his]_186-jameson hand , and [I]_2959-i nearly combust . [This man]_186-jameson is [a god]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i stare up at [him]_186-jameson . “ Anything else ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i breathe . “ Yes . ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson eyes darken , and [he]_186-jameson reaches up and rubs [his]_186-jameson pointer finger over [my]_2959-i bottom lip . “ Tonight , [I]_186-jameson want [you]_186-jameson to take [your]_186-jameson vibrator . ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson voice is deep and hushed and doing things to [my]_2959-i insides that [I]_2959-i did n’t know were possible . [My]_2959-i eyes widen as [he]_186-jameson slightly parts [my]_2959-i lips with [his]_186-jameson finger . Then [he]_186-jameson puts it in [my]_2959-i mouth , and [I]_2959-i find [myself]_2959-i sucking it . [His]_186-jameson eyes darken as [he]_186-jameson watches [me]_2959-i , and a slow , sexy smile crosses [his]_186-jameson face . “ [I]_186-jameson want [you]_186-jameson to fuck [yourself]_186-jameson . Long . . . deep and slow . ”_{[186-jameson]} Oh . . . [Lord]_630-lord have mercy . “ Why would [I]_630-lord do that ? ”_[630-lord] [I]_2959-i breathe . “ Because [I]_186-jameson know it will be [my]_186-jameson face that [you]_186-jameson will see when [you]_186-jameson come . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson bends and licks up [my]_2959-i neck , and then [he]_186-jameson bites [my]_2959-i ear , and [my]_2959-i legs nearly buckle underneath [me]_2959-i . “ Do [your]_186-jameson homework , and [you]_186-jameson will be well rewarded , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson whispers in [my]_2959-i ear before tenderly kissing [my]_2959-i neck with an open mouth . [I]_2959-i ’m like putty in [his]_186-jameson hands . [I]_2959-i ca n’t even pretend to fight this . . . whatever this is . [He]_186-jameson dusts [his]_186-jameson lips across [mine]_2959-i but then steps back , and [my]_2959-i body jerks at [his]_186-jameson withdrawal . [I]_2959-i pant as [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_186-jameson . “ Do [your]_186-jameson homework , [Emily]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i ’ll see [you]_186-jameson tomorrow . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_186-jameson for a moment ; [he]_186-jameson ’s dismissing [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i frown as [he]_186-jameson turns and goes back to sit at [his]_186-jameson desk as if nothing ever happened . [He]_186-jameson picks up [his]_186-jameson scotch and sips it as [his]_186-jameson eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . [He]_186-jameson slides a security key across the desk . “ This will get [you]_2578-you to this floor . ”_[122-huh] [Huh]_122-huh . What in the hell was that ? [I]_2959-i snatch the key and leave [[his]_186-jameson office]_{426-his office} in a fluster . [I]_2959-i get into [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} with [my]_2959-i heart hammering . For fuck ’s sake . [I]_2959-i need to find some self - control , and [I]_2959-i need to find it quick . Because [he]_186-jameson has it all . Chapter 6 [I]_2959-i sit in the café across [the road]_{533-the road} from [the Miles Media building]_{521-the miles media building} . [I]_2959-i told [myself]_2959-i [I]_2959-i came [here]_{385-new york} to get some takeout for dinner . But the truth is , [I]_2959-i want to see [him]_186-jameson leave . [I]_2959-i want to see [his]_186-jameson face , to see if it ’s as flushed as [mine]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i ’m so close to orgasming in public ; it ’s not even funny . How can one finger through clothes arouse [me]_2959-i so much ? [This man]_186-jameson turns [me]_2959-i into a puddle , a wet , soppy , pliable puddle . [I]_2959-i have absolutely no resistance when [he]_186-jameson touches [me]_2959-i . For twelve months [I]_2959-i ’ve dreamed about [Jim]_266-jim , [the funny , carefree man [I]_2959-i spent the night with]_266-jim . And now that [I]_2959-i ’ve met [another version of [him]_186-jameson]_{636-another version of him} , [I]_2959-i ’m not sure that [I]_2959-i like [him]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i mean , [he]_186-jameson ’s hot , hotter than hot . Blazing fucking inferno . Who is [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson ? [I]_2959-i sit on the bench seat by the window and stare across [the street]_{550-the street} , and then [I]_2959-i see [the limousine]_{638-the limousine} arrive and pull into [the parking bay]_{639-the parking bay} . [I]_2959-i sit up . [My]_2959-i stomach flips , and [I]_2959-i hold [my]_2959-i breath as [I]_2959-i watch the door open . In slow motion [he]_186-jameson walks out ; [he]_186-jameson ’s like [a rock star]_{269-a rock star} , and [everyone]_{2304-everyone} turns to watch [him]_186-jameson . [Mr. Orgasmic]_{123-mr. orgasmic} . [I]_2959-i watch as [he]_186-jameson gets into the back of [the limousine]_{638-the limousine} and [the driver]_{530-the driver} closes the door behind [him]_186-jameson , and then it slowly pulls away . [I]_2959-i watch it all the way up [the street]_{550-the street} as it disappears , and [I]_2959-i feel a wave of disappointment roll over [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i wonder what [he]_186-jameson ’s doing tonight . It ’s late , nearly six thirty , and [the Miles Media building]_{521-the miles media building} is emptied out for the day . [I]_2959-i ca n’t believe [I]_2959-i waited around to get a glimpse of [him]_186-jameson leaving . . . what [a loser]_{506-a loser} . [I]_2959-i guess [I]_2959-i may as well order something to eat here . [I]_2959-i ’m only going to go and eat alone at [home]_2289-home anyway . [I]_2959-i pick up the menu and scan the choices , and then the front doors of [Miles Media]_{14-miles media} open again , and [Tristan]_2430-tristan walks out . [I]_2959-i frown as [I]_2959-i watch [him]_186-jameson . [He]_186-jameson ’s with [a woman]_{339-a woman} ; [she]_{339-a woman} ’s blonde and beautiful and wearing a gray woolen fitted dress and high - heeled short black boots . [She]_{339-a woman} has a trendy vibe about [her]_{339-a woman} , and [her]_{339-a woman} hair is in a bouncy ponytail . [She]_{339-a woman} says something , and [he]_186-jameson laughs out loud . [They]_648-they walk around the corner but are still in [my]_2959-i view , and [he]_186-jameson puts [his]_186-jameson hand on [her]_{339-a woman} behind and leans in and kisses [her]_{339-a woman} . Who is [she]_{339-a woman} ? [He]_186-jameson then takes [her]_{339-a woman} hand in [his]_186-jameson , and [they]_648-they disappear up [the street]_{550-the street} together . Does [she]_{339-a woman} work in [the building]_{361-the building} ? [I]_2959-i would have thought [they]_648-they had some no - dating - the - staff kind of rule . Maybe not ? Maybe it ’s a free - for - all , and [they]_648-they ’re fucking [their]_648-they way through [the floors]_{501-the floors} ? Am [I]_2959-i [the only girl [he]_186-jameson ’s flirting with]_{652-the only girl he ’s flirting with} ? Does [he]_186-jameson summon [anyone else]_{527-anyone else} up to [[his]_186-jameson office]_{426-his office} ? [I]_2959-i close [my]_2959-i eyes in disgust . Stop it . [God]_0-aaron , [I]_2959-i need to get a grip . [I]_2959-i go through [my]_2959-i wardrobe and take out [my]_2959-i clothes for tomorrow . It ’s late , and [I]_2959-i ’ve been working on that story that [they]_648-they want . [I]_2959-i hope it ’s all right . [My]_2959-i preparation is different this time . What should [I]_2959-i wear tomorrow ? Do [I]_2959-i do as [I]_2959-i was told ? [I]_2959-i lay out the clothes [Jameson]_186-jameson told [me]_2959-i to wear , and [I]_2959-i stare at them on [my]_2959-i bed . The gray skirt with the split , the white silk shirt . How does [he]_186-jameson know that [I]_2959-i wear a white lace bra with this shirt ? How does [he]_186-jameson even know about this outfit ? [He]_186-jameson watches [me]_2959-i . A sick thrill runs through [me]_2959-i . Fuck , [this guy]_186-jameson is playing with [my]_2959-i head . [I]_2959-i ’m walking around , a raging mass of hormones , and [he]_186-jameson hardly touches [me]_2959-i . Imagine if [he]_186-jameson did . [I]_2959-i think back to this afternoon and the way [his]_186-jameson finger traced [my]_2959-i body and then how [he]_186-jameson put it in [my]_2959-i mouth and [I]_2959-i sucked on it . [His]_186-jameson words come back to [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i want [you]_655-you to fuck [yourself]_655-you . Long . . . deep and slow . [I]_2959-i close [my]_2959-i eyes as arousal begins to heat [my]_2959-i blood . [He]_186-jameson wants [me]_2959-i to think of [him]_186-jameson while [I]_2959-i come . [I]_2959-i go to [my]_2959-i bedside and take out [my]_2959-i vibrator , and [I]_2959-i hold it in [my]_2959-i hand and look at it . “ It ’s a very cold substitute , [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper into the silence . [I]_2959-i have a good mind to call [him]_186-jameson and tell [him]_186-jameson to come over and get the job done in [person]_656-person . But of course [I]_2959-i wo n’t . [I]_2959-i turn off the light and crawl under the covers , and [my]_2959-i hand brushes across [my]_2959-i naked breast . [I]_2959-i close [my]_2959-i eyes and open [my]_2959-i legs and imagine [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson is here with [me]_2959-i . “ Do [[you]_198-molly guys]_{2579-you guys} want to get some dinner after work ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i ask [Molly]_198-molly and [Aaron]_0-aaron . “ Yeah , all right . Something healthy , though , ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly replies as [she]_198-molly types . “ [I]_198-molly ’m never going to get laid if [I]_198-molly do n’t start working on this fat ass . ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly types some more . “ [I]_198-molly have to be done by eight , though . [I]_198-molly have to pick up [the kids]_{452-the kids} . ”_[198-molly] “ Yeah , okay . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron sighs . “ Sounds good . ”_[0-aaron] “ [I]_2959-i have training this afternoon , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reply as [I]_2959-i try to sound casual . [They]_657-they both look up from [their]_657-they work . “ Where ? ”_[657-they] “ In [the management offices]_{2406-the management offices} . ”_[198-molly] “ Oh [my]_198-molly God . ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly smirks . “ Did [he]_0-aaron say anything ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i drop [my]_2959-i head . [I]_2959-i glance up at the cameras . “ [I]_2959-i ’ll tell [you]_2959-i tonight . ”_[2959-i] “ [God]_0-aaron , [I]_0-aaron live for these stories , ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron whispers . “ Please tell [me]_2959-i [you]_2959-i fucked [him]_0-aaron on [his]_0-aaron desk ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i giggle as [I]_2959-i finalize what [I]_2959-i ’m doing . “ No , do n’t be stupid . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i grab [my]_2959-i manila folder with [my]_2959-i fake news story . “ [I]_2959-i ’ll see [[you]_2959-i guys]_{2579-you guys} later . ”_[2959-i] [They]_{2579-you guys} both look up at [me]_2959-i and smirk . “ Good luck . ”_{[2579-you guys]} In five minutes , [I]_2959-i find [myself]_2959-i on the top floor with a ferociously beating heart . [I]_2959-i decided not to wear what [he]_0-aaron told [me]_2959-i to wear ; that ’s just way too eager . What makes [him]_0-aaron think [he]_0-aaron can tell [me]_2959-i what to wear , anyway ? [Sammia]_246-alan smiles when [she]_246-alan sees [me]_2959-i . “ [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} , [you]_{79-mr. miles} have [Emily Foster]_186-jameson [here]_{385-new york} to see [you]_{79-mr. miles} . ”_[246-alan] “ Send [her]_186-jameson in , ”_[0-aaron] [his]_0-aaron velvety voice replies . [I]_2959-i walk through the marble hall on [my]_2959-i tiptoes as [I]_2959-i make another mental note to buy rubber - soled shoes . How do [I]_2959-i keep forgetting to do this ? [I]_2959-i knock on [his]_0-aaron door . “ Come in , ”_[0-aaron] [he]_0-aaron calls . [I]_2959-i open the door and find [him]_0-aaron sitting at [his]_0-aaron desk on the phone ; [his]_0-aaron eyes find [mine]_2959-i . “ Hello , [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_[0-aaron] [he]_0-aaron mouths . “ Hi . ”_[0-aaron] [I]_2959-i smile as [I]_2959-i clutch [my]_2959-i folder . “ Please take a seat . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron gestures to a chair and holds up [his]_0-aaron finger . “ One minute , ”_[0-aaron] [he]_0-aaron mouths . [I]_2959-i smile and nod as [I]_2959-i sit down . “ [I]_0-aaron understand that , [Richard]_246-alan . Yes , [I]_0-aaron know . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron listens . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t care if [she]_186-jameson ’s hardworking . [She]_186-jameson broke protocol , and there are consequences . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . What the hell ? Who ’s [he]_0-aaron talking to ? “ [Richard]_246-alan , ”_[0-aaron] [he]_0-aaron snaps . “ [You]_246-alan will fire [her]_186-jameson this afternoon , or [I]_0-aaron will . And [we]_2583-we both know who ’s going to make it less painful . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron rolls [his]_0-aaron eyes . “ [Tristan]_2430-tristan is aware , yes , ”_[0-aaron] [he]_0-aaron snaps . “ But as the CEO [I]_0-aaron have the control . [You]_246-alan have two hours to escort [Lara Aspin]_{125-lara aspin} from [the building]_{361-the building} , or [I]_0-aaron ’ll come down [myself]_0-aaron . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron hangs up angrily . [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_0-aaron , wide eyed . What did [she]_659-she do ? [He]_0-aaron bites [his]_0-aaron bottom lip angrily as [his]_0-aaron eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ [I]_2959-i ’ve got the story [you]_2959-i requested , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i murmur . “ Good . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron takes the folder from [me]_2959-i and rolls [his]_0-aaron chair back as [he]_0-aaron opens it and begins reading . [He]_0-aaron ’s different today , angry . But maybe it ’s just that call [he]_0-aaron came off from . [He]_0-aaron inhales deeply and flicks the pages , clearly frustrated . “ Is it okay ? ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron raises [his]_0-aaron eyebrows as if unimpressed . [I]_2959-i frown . “ A seismic weather event is hardly breaking news , is it ? ”_[2959-i] “ Well , what do [you]_2959-i want [me]_2959-i to write about ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer . “ [I]_2959-i ca n’t name [a person]_{2585-a person} or place or anything because it ’s fake news . [I]_2959-i do n’t want to get [us]_2586-us sued . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_0-aaron am well aware of what it is , [Ms. Foster]_{126-ms. foster} , ”_[0-aaron] [he]_0-aaron snaps . “ What ’s wrong with [you]_2959-i today ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [He]_0-aaron flicks the pages as [he]_0-aaron reads . “ Nothing . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron reads on . “ This wo n’t do . [I]_2959-i ’ll write it [myself]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ [I]_0-aaron spent four hours on that last night . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron looks up from the papers , and [I]_2959-i wither under [his]_0-aaron glare . “ Well , what do [you]_2959-i want [me]_2959-i to write about , then ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ Anything but fucking weather . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron closes the folder as if disgusted and places it on the table . [He]_0-aaron pushes the intercom . “ [Tristan]_2430-tristan , come in here , please . ”_[0-aaron] “ Yep . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrivel in [my]_2959-i chair a little . [God]_0-aaron , [he]_0-aaron ’s mean when [he]_0-aaron ’s angry . [Tristan]_2430-tristan comes into [the office]_{385-new york} , and [Jameson]_186-jameson exhales heavily . “ [Ms. Foster]_{126-ms. foster} has written [her]_{126-ms. foster} story . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron gestures to the folder . “ Good . ”_[0-aaron] [Tristan]_2430-tristan smiles , and [he]_0-aaron picks it up and begins to read . “ A seismic weather event wo n’t do , ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson barks . [Tristan]_2430-tristan twists [his]_2430-tristan lips as [he]_2430-tristan reads on . “ It ’s very good , though , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [he]_2430-tristan comments . Hmm , [I]_2959-i ’m totally crushing on [the wrong brother]_{661-the wrong brother} . . . [[my]_2959-i one]_{662-an asshole} is [an asshole]_{662-an asshole} . “ Thank [you]_{662-an asshole} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i fake a smile . “ With all due respect , [Jameson]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i state , “ if [we]_2587-we name this weather event and hype it up as coming in the next four months and that it ’s going to cause extensive damage , it will have legs . No names to trace , [people]_248-people , or places . [I]_2959-i do n’t see how [I]_2959-i could have written a story about something else without jeopardizing [our]_2587-we integrity . ”_[2959-i] “ [We]_2587-we are not here to prove [our]_2587-we integrity , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [he]_2430-tristan growls . “ [We]_2587-we are trying to withhold it . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sit back in [my]_2959-i chair , annoyed . “ [I]_2430-tristan want a story on an FBI murder case . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan narrows [his]_2430-tristan eyes as [he]_2430-tristan thinks . “ Make up a fake murder and name and a fake investigation and how close [they]_2589-they are to closing it . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [My]_2959-i anger bubbles . “ If [you]_2590-you knew what [you]_2590-you wanted [me]_2959-i to write , why did n’t [you]_2590-you say that yesterday ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . “ [You]_2590-you told [me]_2430-tristan to do what [I]_2430-tristan wanted , and [I]_2430-tristan spent four hours writing that for [you]_2590-you . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan rolls [his]_2430-tristan lips to hide [his]_2430-tristan smirk . “ [I]_2430-tristan have things to do . Let [me]_2430-tristan know what story [we]_2591-we ’re going with , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [he]_2430-tristan says as [he]_2430-tristan walks toward the door . “ Thanks , [Emily]_186-jameson . Great work . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan closes the door behind [him]_2430-tristan . [I]_2959-i glare at [the asshole]_{663-the asshole} in front of [me]_2959-i . “ So what do [you]_186-jameson want [me]_2959-i to do ? ”_[2959-i] [His]_2430-tristan cold eyes rise to meet [mine]_2959-i . “ [I]_2959-i told [you]_186-jameson what [I]_2959-i wanted [you]_186-jameson to do yesterday , but [you]_186-jameson did n’t do that . . . did [you]_186-jameson ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . Wait , what ’s [he]_2430-tristan talking about now ? [I]_2959-i ’m confused . [He]_2430-tristan does n’t have to be so damn rude . [I]_2959-i snatch the folder from the table . “ All right , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . “ [I]_2430-tristan ’ll write a fake story about a fake murder of [a fake CEO]_{2592-a fake ceo} by [a fake new employee]_{2592-a fake ceo} . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan glares at [me]_2959-i . “ With a fake ax . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ Well . . . , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [he]_2430-tristan says with a sneer , “ just make sure [she]_{2592-a fake ceo} has a fucking gray skirt on . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [My]_2959-i mouth falls open ; [he]_2430-tristan ’s pissed that [I]_2959-i did n’t do what [he]_2430-tristan asked . The nerve of this jerk . “ No , [she]_{2592-a fake ceo} does n’t wear gray skirts on demand . [She]_{2592-a fake ceo} ’s naked because [she]_{2592-a fake ceo} ’s just had wild sex with [[her]_{2592-a fake ceo} hot boyfriend]_{2593-her hot boyfriend} right before [she]_{2592-a fake ceo} chops off [that spoiled - brat CEO]_{2592-a fake ceo} ’s dick . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan narrows [his]_2430-tristan eyes in contempt . [I]_2959-i stand . “ [You]_2430-tristan will have [your]_2430-tristan story by five . [I]_2959-i ’ll email it over . ”_[2959-i] “ No , [you]_2430-tristan ’ll deliver it up here in [person]_656-person . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ With all due respect , [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say as [I]_2959-i smile sweetly , “ [I]_2959-i do n’t feel like seeing [you]_2430-tristan again today . [I]_2959-i ’ll deliver it to [Tristan]_2430-tristan . ”_[2959-i] “ Deliver it to [Tristan]_2430-tristan , and see what happens , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [he]_2430-tristan barks . [I]_2959-i turn and storm out of [the office]_{426-his office} with red steam shooting out of [my]_2959-i ears . [The man]_246-alan ’s a fucking pig . It ’s five thirty , and [I]_2959-i sit at [my]_2959-i desk as [I]_2959-i type the last word of [my]_2959-i fake story . [I]_2959-i hate to admit it , but this one is better . [[My]_2959-i coworkers]_2369-there have gone to [the bar]_{459-the bar} , and [I]_2959-i ’m meeting [them]_2369-there [there]_2369-there . [I]_2959-i ’m supposed to be taking it up to [[his]_246-alan office]_{426-his office} , but [I]_2959-i ’m not . Screw [him]_246-alan . [I]_2959-i hit send to email it over , and [I]_2959-i turn off [my]_2959-i computer and pack up [my]_2959-i desk . [My]_2959-i phone rings , and the letter [J]_127-j lights up the screen . [I]_2959-i saved [his]_246-alan initial so [I]_2959-i ’d know if [he]_246-alan calls [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i pick up [my]_2959-i phone and hit decline , and then [I]_2959-i smile sweetly at the camera , knowing full well [he]_246-alan ’s watching [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i did not just break up with [one selfish asshole]_{668-one selfish asshole} to go out with another . [He]_246-alan can kiss [my]_2959-i ass . A text comes through . Answer [your]_669-your fucking phone . [I]_2959-i glare at the text and write back . [I]_2959-i have nothing to say to [you]_669-your . [I]_2959-i ’ve finished work for the day . [You]_669-your have [your]_669-your story . Good luck with it . A reply bounces back . This is a personal call . [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes in disgust and reply . Find someone else in a gray skirt to suck [your]_669-your dick on demand . [I]_2959-i ’m not interested in the position . [I]_2959-i put [my]_2959-i phone on silent and then into [my]_2959-i bag and continue to pack up [my]_2959-i desk . [I]_2959-i take the elevator down to [the foyer]_{670-the foyer} , and as [I]_2959-i walk through , [a security guard]_{263-the security guard} is on the phone . “ Excuse [me]_{263-the security guard} , [miss]_{263-the security guard} , ”_{[263-the security guard]} [he]_{263-the security guard} calls . “ Yes . ”_{[263-the security guard]} “ [I]_{263-the security guard} ’ve been instructed to tell [you]_{263-the security guard} to wait here . ”_{[263-the security guard]} Shit . [He]_{263-the security guard} ’s on [his]_{263-the security guard} way down . “ Um , no , [I]_{263-the security guard} ca n’t . [I]_{263-the security guard} ’m sorry . Apologize for [me]_{263-the security guard} , ”_{[263-the security guard]} [I]_2959-i stammer as [I]_2959-i brush past [him]_{263-the security guard} and out through the front doors . [I]_2959-i run around [the corner]_{672-the corner} , and then when [I]_2959-i ’m out of sight of [the security guard]_{263-the security guard} , [I]_2959-i run across [the street]_{550-the street} and duck into the café [I]_2959-i was in yesterday afternoon so [I]_2959-i can see . What does [he]_{263-the security guard} want ? [I]_2959-i take a seat in the café by the window , and then [I]_2959-i see [Jameson]_186-jameson come out the front doors in a rush and then look up and down [the street]_{550-the street} . [He]_186-jameson takes out [his]_186-jameson phone and calls [someone]_2326-someone . [My]_2959-i phone starts to vibrate in [my]_2959-i bag . Shit . [I]_2959-i ’m going to totally screw up this opportunity and get [myself]_2959-i fired . Is that why [that other girl]_{675-that other girl} got fired today ? Was [she]_{675-that other girl} sleeping with [him]_186-jameson , and things turned bad ? [I]_2959-i watch [him]_186-jameson look up and down [the street]_{550-the street} and dial the number again . [I]_2959-i let it ring . [He]_186-jameson ’s openly furious . The front doors of [the building]_{361-the building} open , and [Tristan]_2430-tristan comes out . [Jameson]_186-jameson says something to [him]_186-jameson , and [Tristan]_2430-tristan laughs . What did [he]_186-jameson say ? [I]_2959-i watch with [my]_2959-i heart beating hard as [they]_677-they both look up and down [the street]_{550-the street} , and then [the limousine]_{638-the limousine} pulls in . [He]_186-jameson calls [me]_2959-i again , and [I]_2959-i close [my]_2959-i eyes . Stop calling [me]_2959-i . [They]_677-they finally get into [the limo]_{638-the limousine} , and [I]_2959-i watch as it pulls away . [I]_2959-i drag [my]_2959-i hand down [my]_2959-i face in despair . [His]_186-jameson temper and [my]_2959-i temper are a bad combination . [We]_679-we are officially a bad idea . An hour later “ What do [you]_198-molly mean ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly frowns . “ [I]_198-molly ’m confused . ”_[198-molly] “ It ’s all just one big mess . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sigh . “ [I]_2959-i went [home]_2289-home to [California]_{12-california} , and it turns out that [Robbie]_56-robbie did n’t actually give a crap , so [I]_2959-i ended it . But [I]_2959-i did n’t tell [Jameson]_186-jameson that because [I]_2959-i do n’t want [him]_186-jameson to think that it was because of [him]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] “ Yeah , [I]_198-molly get that . ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly frowns . “ But why is [Jameson]_186-jameson being such [an asshole]_{662-an asshole} now ? ”_[198-molly] “ Because [she]_198-molly did n’t wear the gray skirt , ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron interrupts . “ Do n’t [you]_0-aaron listen ? ”_[0-aaron] “ But why ? ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly gasps . “ That ’s ridiculous . ”_[198-molly] “ [I]_2959-i know , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . “ It ’s not about the skirt , ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron replies as [he]_0-aaron chews . “ It ’s a power thing . [He]_0-aaron wants [her]_198-molly to do as [he]_0-aaron asks . ”_[0-aaron] [I]_2959-i frown as [I]_2959-i listen . “ [You]_0-aaron think ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_198-molly still do n’t get it . ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly frowns . “ It ’s symbolic to [him]_0-aaron . [He]_0-aaron wants [her]_198-molly to submit . ”_[198-molly] “ Well , [I]_2959-i ’m not , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i huff . “ Honestly , [the man]_0-aaron is fucking stupid if [he]_0-aaron thinks that [I]_198-molly will . ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly rolls [her]_198-molly eyes . “ Oh God , if [he]_0-aaron asked [me]_198-molly to wear a skirt made of kidneys , [I]_198-molly would , ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly huffs as [she]_198-molly stares into space . “ [I]_0-aaron would even kill [fifty men]_{2597-fifty men} to get the said kidneys . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron chuckles . “ Right ? [Me]_0-aaron too . There is n’t actually anything that [he]_0-aaron could n’t ask [me]_0-aaron to do . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron holds [his]_0-aaron hands in the air . “ [I]_2959-i would do it all . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes , and [we]_680-we all think for a moment . “ [You]_0-aaron know what [I]_198-molly would do if [I]_198-molly were [you]_0-aaron ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly says . “ What ? ”_[198-molly] “ [I]_2959-i would wear the gray skirt tomorrow , and [I]_2959-i would ignore the fuck out of [him]_0-aaron . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stare at [her]_198-molly . “ Make [the bastard]_0-aaron weep . ”_[2959-i] “ Yeah . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron smiles broadly . “ Flirt [your]_0-aaron ass off in that gray skirt . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smirk as the idea rolls around in [my]_2959-i head . “ [You]_0-aaron know , [guys]_{546-my friends} . . . that ’s not actually a bad idea . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i hold [my]_2959-i glass up in the air as [I]_2959-i smile at [[my]_2959-i two friends]_{546-my friends} . “ To [Operation Flirty Office Slut]_{19-operation flirty office slut} . ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly smiles as [she]_198-molly clinks [her]_198-molly glass with [mine]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i smirk as [I]_2959-i stare at [her]_198-molly . “ Game on . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i march into [the office]_{385-new york} like a rock star . No stockings . . . check . White lace bra . . . check . White silk shirt . . . check . High ponytail . . . check . Gray skirt with split . . . check , check , double check . “ Good morning . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile at [[my]_2959-i friends]_{546-my friends} as [I]_2959-i arrive at [my]_2959-i desk . [Their]_{546-my friends} eyes come to [me]_2959-i , and [they]_{546-my friends} smirk as [they]_{546-my friends} see [I]_2959-i ’m wearing the requested outfit . [Aaron]_0-aaron gives [me]_2959-i a wink and turns back to [his]_0-aaron computer . “ Does [anybody]_457-anybody want coffee ? ”_[0-aaron] [I]_2959-i ask . “ Yes , please , ”_{[546-my friends]} [they]_{546-my friends} both reply . [I]_2959-i walk into [the kitchen]_{683-the kitchen} , and [Ricardo]_246-alan follows [me]_2959-i in . “ Hey , chickie , [I]_246-alan ’ve been waiting for [you]_246-alan . ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i smile an over - the - top fake smile . [God]_0-aaron . . . ca n’t [I]_2959-i have someone better to fake flirt with than [this guy]_266-jim ? “ Hi , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reply excitedly . “ How are [you]_246-alan ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_0-aaron ’m good . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron smiles at [my]_2959-i enthusiasm . “ Listen , [I]_0-aaron ’m so sorry [I]_0-aaron got [you]_246-alan into trouble the other day . ”_[0-aaron] [I]_2959-i smile and pull [my]_2959-i hand through [my]_2959-i ponytail . “ That ’s okay . Come and see [me]_0-aaron later , though , wo n’t [you]_246-alan ? ”_[0-aaron] [His]_0-aaron eyes light up . “ Okay , it ’s a deal . ”_[0-aaron] [I]_2959-i walk back to [my]_2959-i desk and take a seat with [our]_685-our three coffees , and [I]_2959-i open [my]_2959-i emails and get to work . [Jameson]_186-jameson called [me]_2959-i six times last night , and [I]_2959-i do n’t know why . [I]_2959-i ’m not sure if [he]_0-aaron wanted to apologize or fight . . . but [I]_2959-i ’m not giving [him]_0-aaron the satisfaction of answering [his]_0-aaron call so [he]_0-aaron can do either . [I]_2959-i ’m going to have a good day , and [I]_2959-i ’m not going to think about [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson once . It ’s three o’clock , and [Operation Flirty Office Slut]_{19-operation flirty office slut} is in full swing . [I]_2959-i ’ve smiled and laughed with every loser in [the building]_{361-the building} today . [I]_2959-i ’m not sure if [he]_0-aaron ’s even watching , but [I]_2959-i ’m about to up the ante . [I]_2959-i ’m on [my]_2959-i way up to see [Tristan]_2430-tristan about the story [I]_2959-i wrote . The elevator doors open , and [I]_2959-i smile sweetly at [the receptionist]_{625-the receptionist} . “ Hello , [I]_2959-i ’m here to see [Tristan]_2430-tristan . ”_[2959-i] “ Sure , just a moment . ”_{[625-the receptionist]} [She]_{625-the receptionist} frowns as [she]_{625-the receptionist} tries to remember [my]_2959-i name . “ It ’s [Emily Foster]_186-jameson . ”_{[625-the receptionist]} “ That ’s right . [I]_{625-the receptionist} ’m sorry . ”_{[625-the receptionist]} [She]_{625-the receptionist} calls through . “ [Tristan]_2430-tristan , [I]_{625-the receptionist} have [Emily Foster]_186-jameson here to see [you]_186-jameson . ”_{[625-the receptionist]} “ Okay , send [her]_186-jameson in , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [he]_2430-tristan replies happily . “ Just go through to [the main conference room]_{2599-the main conference room} , but instead of turning left to go to [[Jameson]_186-jameson ’s office]_{2600-jameson ’s office} , turn right , and go down [the corridor]_{609-the corridor} on the other side of [the building]_{361-the building} . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ Thank [you]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i follow [her]_{625-the receptionist} directions and head down to the other end of [the building]_{361-the building} . [I]_2959-i frown ; there are four office doors . [I]_2959-i hesitate . Which door did [she]_{625-the receptionist} say ? [I]_2959-i walk down [the corridor]_{609-the corridor} , and a door is open . [I]_2959-i see [Jameson]_186-jameson is in there , talking to [a man]_{2300-a man} . “ Sorry to bother [you]_186-jameson . Is [[Tristan]_2430-tristan ’s office]_{385-new york} down [here]_{385-new york} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s face falls as [he]_186-jameson sees [me]_2959-i . “ Next door , ”_{[2300-a man]} [the other man]_{2300-a man} replies . [I]_2959-i smile sweetly . “ Thank [you]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i head over and knock on [Tristan]_2430-tristan ’s door . “ Come in , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson calls , and [I]_2959-i walk in and close the door behind [me]_2959-i . “ Hello . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . “ Hi , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson smiles warmly as [he]_186-jameson gestures to the chair in front of [his]_186-jameson desk . “ Please take a seat . ”_{[186-jameson]} As [I]_2959-i sit down , [I]_2959-i come to the realization that [Tristan]_2430-tristan does n’t make [me]_2959-i nervous at all ; [I]_2959-i wish [[his]_2430-tristan brother]_{617-his brother} did n’t . “ [I]_2959-i just was wondering if [you]_186-jameson had time to look at the story [I]_2959-i wrote ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2430-tristan did , yes , and [I]_2430-tristan loved it . Were [you]_186-jameson happy with it ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ Yeah , [I]_186-jameson think it was better . [I]_186-jameson was n’t sure what [you]_186-jameson wanted [me]_186-jameson to do with it next . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson frowns . “ [We]_2602-we ’ll need to submit it as if it has come to [you]_186-jameson . Did [you]_186-jameson talk to [Jameson]_186-jameson ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Umm . ”_{[186-jameson]} The office door opens , and [Jameson]_186-jameson marches in . “ Hello . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Speak of [the devil]_{2540-the devil} . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan smiles . “ Hello , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reply as [I]_2959-i turn [my]_2959-i attention back to [Tristan]_2430-tristan . It ’s hard not to stare at [Jameson]_186-jameson when [he]_186-jameson ’s in [a room]_{692-a room} ; [he]_186-jameson overtakes any space . This playing hard to get is harder to do than it looks . “ [Emily]_186-jameson is here to talk about the story [she]_186-jameson wrote . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [I]_186-jameson see . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson stares at [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i feel the magnetic pull to [him]_186-jameson as it begins to surround [me]_2959-i . “ Was it okay ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ It was . ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ It was very good . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Are [we]_{693-the two men} just going to submit it now as if it has come to [her]_186-jameson as news ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan asks . [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s eyes stay fixed on [mine]_2959-i . “ Yes , [I]_186-jameson think so . ”_{[186-jameson]} [My]_2959-i eyes flick between [the two men]_{693-the two men} . “ Okay . [I]_186-jameson ’ll submit it and let [you]_186-jameson know what happens . ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ [I]_2959-i have something [I]_2959-i need [you]_186-jameson to add with it . It ’s on [my]_2959-i computer . Come with [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i ’ll get it now . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i nerves tingle . “ Okay , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reply as [I]_2959-i stand . [Jameson]_186-jameson holds [his]_186-jameson hand out . “ [Ladies]_2604-ladies first . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i turn to [Tristan]_2430-tristan . “ Thank [you]_2430-tristan . See [you]_2430-tristan later . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan smiles broadly . “ Goodbye . Have a nice afternoon . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [I]_2959-i walk to [[Jameson]_186-jameson ’s office]_{426-his office} , and [I]_2959-i can feel the heat of [his]_186-jameson stare on [my]_2959-i behind . Just play it cool . . . no flirting . . . no touching . Just play it cool . [I]_2959-i am here to prick tease [the bastard]_2430-tristan . . . nothing more and nothing less . [We]_695-we get to [[his]_186-jameson office]_{426-his office} , and [he]_186-jameson opens the door . [I]_2959-i walk past [him]_186-jameson , and then [he]_186-jameson closes it and flicks the lock . [I]_2959-i turn to [him]_186-jameson as [he]_186-jameson steps toward [me]_2959-i in slow motion . [His]_186-jameson face comes to within an inch of [mine]_2959-i . [Our]_695-we eyes search [each other]_{2339-each other} ’s , and without a word said , [he]_186-jameson grabs [my]_2959-i ponytail and wraps it around [his]_186-jameson hand and pulls [my]_2959-i head back to [his]_186-jameson face . “ Do n’t fight with [me]_186-jameson , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson breathes , then leans down and licks [my]_2959-i lips . “ Do n’t be [an asshole]_{662-an asshole} , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [He]_186-jameson bends and runs [his]_186-jameson hand up [my]_2959-i bare leg as [he]_186-jameson holds [my]_2959-i hair in [his]_186-jameson hand . [His]_186-jameson tongue licks up the length of [my]_2959-i neck , which is stretched out for [him]_186-jameson , as [his]_186-jameson hand grabs [my]_2959-i behind . “ Tell [me]_186-jameson [he]_186-jameson ’s gone , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson whispers in [my]_2959-i ear as [he]_186-jameson kisses it softly . Ah . . . this is not how the plan went in [my]_2959-i head . [I]_2959-i ’m supposed to be rejecting [him]_186-jameson right about now . Abort mission . . . “ [He]_186-jameson ’s gone , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i breathe . [His]_186-jameson lips take [mine]_2959-i , and [his]_186-jameson tongue slides effortlessly through [my]_2959-i mouth as [my]_2959-i senses awaken . [His]_186-jameson hand grinds [me]_2959-i onto [his]_186-jameson waiting erection as [our]_697-our kiss turns frantic . [He]_186-jameson pushes [me]_2959-i up against the wall and tears [my]_2959-i skirt up and slips [his]_186-jameson thick fingers underneath [my]_2959-i panties . [His]_186-jameson dark eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ Tonight , [we]_697-our fuck . ”_{[186-jameson]} Chapter 7 “ Jameson , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ Will [you]_697-our behave ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pull [my]_2959-i skirt down over [my]_2959-i hips . [He]_186-jameson smiles into [my]_2959-i neck and pulls [me]_2959-i closer ; [his]_186-jameson lips brush against [mine]_2959-i as [he]_186-jameson takes [my]_2959-i face in [his]_186-jameson hands . The kiss is slow , long , and deliberate , and [I]_2959-i find [my]_2959-i feet floating in the air . “ Dinner ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson breathes . “ Hmm . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i smile against [him]_186-jameson as [he]_186-jameson holds [my]_2959-i face . There ’s no mistaking that kiss . It ’s tempting , sensual , and a promise of sexual satisfaction . “ What time will [I]_186-jameson pick [you]_186-jameson up ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ That depends . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ On what ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ On whether [you]_186-jameson think [you]_186-jameson can tell [me]_186-jameson what to wear and what to do . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson smiles softly , and [I]_2959-i feel [my]_2959-i heart skip a beat ; [he]_186-jameson has n’t smiled at [me]_2959-i like that since the first night [we]_698-we met . “ Forgive [me]_186-jameson , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson whispers as [he]_186-jameson leans in and kisses [me]_2959-i again . “ [I]_186-jameson simply wanted [you]_186-jameson to wear [my]_186-jameson favorite outfit so [I]_186-jameson could admire [you]_186-jameson in it . ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson lips drop to [my]_2959-i neck as if [he]_186-jameson ’s unable to stop [himself]_186-jameson . “ [I]_186-jameson did n’t mean to offend . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Do [you]_186-jameson have to be so abrasive with [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper as [his]_186-jameson teeth skim [my]_2959-i jawline . “ [Abrasive]_128-abrasive is who [I]_2959-i am . ”_[2959-i] “ [The man [I]_186-jameson met]_{2606-the man i met} was funny and carefree . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson smiles down at [me]_2959-i as [he]_186-jameson brushes the hair back from [my]_2959-i forehead . “ [Our]_699-our meeting was a luxury that [I]_186-jameson ’ve never been afforded . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ How so ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [I]_186-jameson had the gift of anonymity . ”_{[186-jameson]} [Our]_699-our lips touch , and [I]_2959-i rub [my]_2959-i fingers through [his]_186-jameson stubble . “ Why are [you]_{2606-the man i met} so different here ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [He]_186-jameson pulls out of [my]_2959-i grip and walks over to [his]_186-jameson desk . “ [I]_186-jameson am who [I]_186-jameson have to be , [Emily]_186-jameson . Funny and carefree ca n’t successfully run an empire . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_186-jameson as [I]_2959-i think for a moment . “ Okay , then [I]_186-jameson guess [I]_186-jameson ’ll have to decline dinner . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Why is that ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Because [I]_186-jameson want to spend a night with [Jim]_266-jim . ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson [the CEO]_186-jameson does n’t interest [me]_186-jameson . [I]_186-jameson could n’t care less about [your]_186-jameson money or [your]_186-jameson power . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson stares at [me]_2959-i for an extended time as if processing [my]_2959-i words . [I]_2959-i walk over and kiss [him]_186-jameson softly . “ Tell [Jim]_266-jim to pick [me]_2959-i up at seven , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper as [I]_2959-i run [my]_2959-i tongue through [his]_186-jameson lips . “ [I]_{129-tenderness} ’m aching for [him]_186-jameson . ”_{[129-tenderness]} [Tenderness]_{129-tenderness} crosses [his]_186-jameson face . “ [I]_{129-tenderness} ’ll see what [I]_{129-tenderness} can do . ”_{[129-tenderness]} [I]_2959-i walk back down to [my]_2959-i floor and take a seat at [my]_2959-i desk . “ How did it go ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron whispers as [he]_0-aaron types . “ Did [you]_0-aaron make [him]_0-aaron beg ? ”_[0-aaron] “ [God]_0-aaron , [I]_2959-i ’m totally crap at playing hard to get . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sigh . [Molly]_198-molly smirks . “ Are n’t [we]_2607-we all ? ”_[198-molly] [I]_2959-i open [my]_2959-i computer . “ Well ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron whispers as [he]_0-aaron stops working . “ Tell [us]_2607-we . ”_[0-aaron] “ [We]_2607-we ’re having dinner tonight , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reply as [I]_2959-i try to sound casual . “ Oh [my]_198-molly God , ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly whispers in excitement . “ What the hell are [you]_198-molly wearing ? ”_[198-molly] “ [I]_2959-i do n’t know . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ Something insanely hot . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i hold [my]_2959-i hand over [my]_2959-i heart as [I]_2959-i try to will it to slow down , and [I]_2959-i glance at the clock on the wall—6:55 p.m. [He]_0-aaron ’ll be here any minute . [I]_2959-i shake [my]_2959-i hands around and pace back and forth . “ Just be cool . . . do n’t sleep with [him]_0-aaron . Whatever [you]_198-molly do , do n’t be easy , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i remind [myself]_2959-i out loud . [I]_2959-i walk back to the mirror in [the bathroom]_{300-the bathroom} and reapply [my]_2959-i lipstick . “ Get to know each other , and then make an informed decision based on [his]_0-aaron personality and not how much [he]_0-aaron turns [you]_198-molly on . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smirk at the ridiculous girl talking to [her]_701-her reflection . If [his]_0-aaron dick was n’t so perfect , [I]_2959-i would n’t be thinking about it at all , then . . . would [I]_2959-i ? [My]_2959-i phone buzzes . “ Hello , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i answer as [my]_2959-i heart races . “ [I]_0-aaron ’m [downstairs]_{2454-downstairs} , ”_[0-aaron] [his]_0-aaron deep , velvety voice purrs . “ What number are [you]_0-aaron ? ”_[0-aaron] “ [I]_2959-i ’ll come down now . See [you]_0-aaron soon . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i walk back to the full - length mirror and take one last look . [I]_2959-i ’m wearing a black fitted dress that hangs to just below [my]_2959-i knees . It has spaghetti straps and a low back . It goes with [my]_2959-i black stilettos and matching clutch . [My]_2959-i long dark hair is set in big Hollywood curls and pinned back on one side . [I]_2959-i ’ve gone all out with [my]_2959-i makeup and have smoky gray eyes and glossy red lips . And of course , [I]_2959-i ’m waxed to within an inch of [my]_2959-i life . . . just in case . [I]_2959-i take [the elevator]_{670-the foyer} , and when [I]_2959-i walk out through [the foyer]_{670-the foyer} , [I]_2959-i see [him]_0-aaron through the glass front doors of [[my]_2959-i building]_{703-my building} . [He]_0-aaron ’s wearing a navy sports coat and blue jeans with a white T - shirt . [He]_0-aaron looks like [he]_0-aaron ’s stepped straight out of a magazine . [My]_2959-i breath catches at the sight of [him]_0-aaron , and [I]_2959-i smile as [he]_0-aaron turns toward [me]_2959-i . “ Hi . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron smiles . “ Hi . ”_[0-aaron] [His]_0-aaron eyes roam down the length of [my]_2959-i body as [he]_0-aaron takes [my]_2959-i hand in [his]_0-aaron . “ [You]_0-aaron look beautiful . ”_[0-aaron] “ Thank [you]_0-aaron . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile bashfully . [We]_704-we stare at each other . . . and it ’s there again . The electric current that runs between [us]_704-we whenever [we]_704-we ’re alone . “ What do [you]_0-aaron want to do ? ”_[0-aaron] [he]_0-aaron asks as [his]_0-aaron eyes drop to [my]_2959-i lips . [I]_2959-i smile . [Jim]_266-jim ’s here — [Jameson]_186-jameson would n’t ask [me]_2959-i what [I]_2959-i wanted to do . “ Did n’t [you]_0-aaron mention [Italian]_130-italian ? ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron leans in and kisses [me]_2959-i , with just the right amount of suction to raise [my]_2959-i feet from the floor . [My]_2959-i arms go around [his]_0-aaron neck , and [we]_704-we stand in [the street]_{550-the street} and stare at each other . “ [You]_0-aaron really do turn [me]_0-aaron on , [Emily Foster]_186-jameson , ”_[0-aaron] [he]_0-aaron breathes . [I]_2959-i smile as [I]_2959-i pull [my]_2959-i fingers through [his]_0-aaron dark hair . “ Did [you]_186-jameson come all the way across [town]_2456-town to make out with [me]_2959-i on [the street]_{550-the street} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask innocently . “ No . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron smirks . “ But now that [I]_0-aaron ’m here , it ’s the only thing [I]_0-aaron want to do . ”_[0-aaron] [We]_704-we kiss again , and it ’s slow and tender , and [I]_2959-i feel [my]_2959-i arousal fly in like a 747 . [His]_0-aaron hard length makes an appearance up against [my]_2959-i stomach , and [I]_2959-i smile broadly . “ What ? ”_[2959-i] “ Is [he]_0-aaron coming to dinner ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . [He]_0-aaron chuckles . “ Well , [he]_0-aaron does seem to want to hang around whenever [you]_2610-you are near . ”_[0-aaron] “ Hanging is n’t a word that [I]_0-aaron would use to describe that thing . ”_[0-aaron] [His]_0-aaron eyes sparkle with a certain something , and [he]_0-aaron takes [my]_2959-i hand in [his]_0-aaron . “ Let ’s go this way . ”_[0-aaron] “ [We]_706-we ’re walking ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask in surprise . “ [I]_0-aaron got dropped off . [They]_706-we ’ll pick [us]_706-we up later . [We]_706-we ’ll catch [a cab]_{707-a cab} from [here]_{385-new york} to [the restaurant]_{2612-the restaurant} . ”_[0-aaron] “ Okay . ”_[706-we] [We]_706-we walk around the corner , and [he]_0-aaron hails [a cab]_{707-a cab} , and [we]_706-we climb into the back of it . “ [Waverly Place]_{20-waverly place} , please . ”_[0-aaron] “ Okay . ”_{[530-the driver]} [The driver]_{530-the driver} pulls out into [the traffic]_{709-the traffic} . “ How long have [you]_2613-you lived in [New York]_{385-new york} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ [My]_2959-i whole life . ”_[2959-i] “ [[Your]_2959-i parents]_{2614-your parents} live here ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . [I]_2959-i ca n’t imagine growing up in [a city]_{710-a city} like this . “ Yes , although [I]_2959-i went to [school]_366-school elsewhere . ”_[2959-i] “ Where did [you]_2959-i go to [school]_366-school ? ”_[2959-i] “ Many places — finished in [Aspen]_21-aspen . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_{530-the driver} . What the hell ? “ [You]_2959-i went to [school]_366-school alone in [Aspen]_21-aspen ? ”_[2959-i] “ No , [I]_{530-the driver} always had [[my]_{530-the driver} brothers]_{2616-my brothers} with [me]_{530-the driver} . ”_{[530-the driver]} [He]_{530-the driver} picks [my]_2959-i hand up and kisses the back of it with a soft smile . [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_{530-the driver} . [We]_711-we come from completely different worlds . [I]_2959-i ca n’t even fathom [his]_{530-the driver} upbringing . “ What ’s that look ? ”_{[530-the driver]} [he]_{530-the driver} asks . “ [I]_{530-the driver} was n’t even allowed to have a sleepover at [[[my]_{530-the driver} friend]_{2617-my friend} ’s place]_{2618-my friend ’s place} . ”_{[530-the driver]} “ [Independence]_{131-independence} has always been encouraged in [[my]_2959-i family]_{2619-my family} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile as [I]_2959-i think of something . “ What ? ”_[2959-i] “ If [you]_2620-you ’ve been living on [your]_2620-you own since [you]_2620-you were . . . ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pause as [I]_2959-i wait for [his]_{530-the driver} answer . “ Twelve . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_2620-you should have the emotional intelligence of a ninety - year - old . Is that right ? ”_{[530-the driver]} [He]_{530-the driver} throws [his]_{530-the driver} head back and laughs out loud . “ Should being the operative word . ”_{[530-the driver]} [His]_{530-the driver} eyes dance with delight . “ And what would [your]_2620-you emotional intelligence be at ? ”_{[530-the driver]} “ Hmm . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown as [I]_2959-i think . “ Emotionally [I]_2959-i think [I]_2959-i would be about age thirty . ”_[2959-i] “ Physically ? ”_{[530-the driver]} [He]_{530-the driver} smirks . “ Oh God , eighteen . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i laugh . “ [I]_{530-the driver} ’m not very experienced at all . ”_{[530-the driver]} [His]_{530-the driver} eyes hold [mine]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i feel the burn from [his]_{530-the driver} gaze . “ What would [your]_2620-you physical experience be at ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ [I]_{530-the driver} ’m more of a show than tell kind of person . ”_{[530-the driver]} [He]_{530-the driver} gives [me]_2959-i a slow , sexy smile . “ Happy to give [you]_2620-you a demonstration , though . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i giggle as [the cab]_{712-the cab} pulls to a stop . “ [I]_2959-i bet [you]_2620-you are . ”_[2959-i] [We]_713-we climb out of [the cab]_{712-the cab} , and two minutes later [Jameson]_186-jameson pulls [me]_2959-i by the hand into [a restaurant named [Babbo]_132-babbo]_{2612-the restaurant} . It kind of looks like [a mini English pub]_{715-a mini english pub} from the outside , all quaint and cute , but when [we]_713-we walk through the door , it ’s a lot bigger than it seems . The space is dark and moody , and gold light fixtures add to the ambience . Fresh flowers are in giant vases everywhere , and it feels super romantic . “ Hello , [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} . ”_[246-alan] [The man at the desk]_246-alan smiles . “ [Your]_246-alan table is this way , [sir]_246-alan . ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson takes [my]_2959-i hand and leads [me]_2959-i through to the corner of [the restaurant]_{2612-the restaurant} ; [the waiter]_{717-the waiter} pulls out [my]_2959-i chair . “ Thank [you]_246-alan . ”_{[717-the waiter]} “ Would [you]_246-alan like something to drink to start ? ”_{[717-the waiter]} “ Yes . ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson peruses the wine menu . “ Red ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson asks [me]_2959-i . “ Whatever . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug with a nervous smile . “ [We]_718-we ’ll have a bottle of [Henschke]_133-henschke . ”_[2959-i] “ Yes , [sir]_186-jameson ; which one ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Hill of Roses , please , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson replies as [he]_186-jameson closes the menu . [The waiter]_{717-the waiter} disappears , leaving [us]_718-we alone . “ [I]_2959-i ’m guessing that [you]_246-alan know [your]_246-alan wine ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . [He]_186-jameson pours [us]_718-we both a glass of water . “ [I]_186-jameson only go to [restaurants]_{2621-restaurants} that stock the wine [I]_186-jameson like . So yes , [I]_186-jameson suppose [I]_186-jameson know wine . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Ah . [I]_2959-i see . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smirk . “ One of those . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson smiles . “ Perhaps . ”_{[186-jameson]} [Our]_718-we eyes linger on each other ’s faces for a moment . “ [I]_186-jameson ca n’t believe [you]_246-alan ’re the frigging CEO . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson chuckles and rests [his]_186-jameson face on [his]_186-jameson hand . “ [I]_186-jameson thought [you]_246-alan wanted a date with [Jim]_266-jim tonight ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [I]_186-jameson did . . . [I]_186-jameson mean , [I]_186-jameson do . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Well , why are [we]_718-we talking about [CEOs]_2622-ceos ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile softly . “ [I]_{717-the waiter} do n’t know . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [The waiter]_{717-the waiter} returns and opens the bottle of wine and pours a little in a glass . [Jameson]_186-jameson tastes it . “ That ’s fine . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [The waiter]_{717-the waiter} fills [our]_718-we glasses and disappears . [Jameson]_186-jameson holds [his]_186-jameson glass up , and [I]_2959-i softly clink it with [mine]_2959-i and take a sip and taste the rich , velvety flavor . “ Hmm . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i nod . “ [I]_2959-i ’m impressed . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_186-jameson have excellent taste . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson smiles before falling serious again . “ In all things . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile bashfully ; [he]_186-jameson ’s talking about [me]_2959-i . “ Tell [me]_186-jameson about last weekend , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson asks . “ Not much to tell . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [You]_186-jameson broke up with [him]_186-jameson ? ”_[2959-i] “ It was a long time coming . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [You]_186-jameson were n’t happy ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ No . Not for a long time . ”_[2959-i] “ What ’s [his]_186-jameson name ? What does [he]_186-jameson do ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [I]_2959-i ’m not telling [you]_186-jameson [his]_186-jameson name , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . “ [He]_186-jameson ’s [a businessman — successful and handsome]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i lie . [He]_186-jameson sips [his]_186-jameson wine as [he]_186-jameson watches [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i know [he]_186-jameson has something else on [his]_186-jameson mind . “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ Did [you]_2959-i ever think about [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] “ Yes . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile softly . “ Did [you]_2959-i ever think about [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_186-jameson did , actually . ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ What did [you]_2959-i think about ? ”_[2959-i] A slow , sexy smile crosses [his]_186-jameson face . “ What ? ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_2959-i do n’t want to know . ”_[2959-i] “ No , [I]_2959-i do . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . “ Tell [me]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_186-jameson was thinking that [you]_2959-i were probably the hottest sex [I]_186-jameson ’d ever had . ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson eyes drop to [my]_2959-i lips . The air crackles between [us]_720-us . “ And even now , every time [I]_2959-i ’m in [a room]_{692-a room} with [you]_2959-i , it ’s as if [my]_2959-i body takes on a need of its own . ”_[2959-i] Time stops as [we]_720-us stare at each other . [He]_186-jameson sips [his]_186-jameson wine in slow motion . “ When [I]_186-jameson look at [you]_2959-i . . . [I]_186-jameson have one thing on [my]_186-jameson mind , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson murmurs . “ [I]_134-primal ca n’t help it . It ’s almost primal . ”_[134-primal] [Primal]_134-primal . “ It ’s getting damn hard to control , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson whispers darkly . Damn , [this man]_56-robbie is something else , but every warning signal is telling [me]_2959-i to run away as fast as [I]_2959-i can . If [he]_56-robbie can affect [me]_2959-i the way [he]_56-robbie did after one night . . . what could two nights do ? [Our]_720-us eyes are locked , and arousal heats [my]_2959-i blood . Suddenly [I]_2959-i do n’t want to play hard to get ; [I]_2959-i do n’t care if [we]_722-we do n’t know [each other]_{2339-each other} . [I]_2959-i do n’t care about the risks . [He]_186-jameson has something that [I]_2959-i need . . . and damn it , [I]_2959-i ’m taking it without questions . “ [We]_722-we should order , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [He]_186-jameson opens the menu with a sense of urgency . “ What do [you]_2624-you want ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Whatever ’s the quickest . ”_{[186-jameson]} An hour later , [he]_186-jameson pulls [me]_2959-i up [the sidewalk]_{724-the sidewalk} by the hand . “ [[My]_186-jameson car]_{2625-my car} is parked around here . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson turns and takes [me]_2959-i into [his]_186-jameson arms and aggressively kisses [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i smile against [his]_186-jameson lips . The way [we]_725-we laughed and talked over dinner tonight reminded [me]_2959-i of the Jim [I]_2959-i remember , [the man on [the plane who was interested in everything about [me]_2959-i and [my]_2959-i life]_{727-the plane who was interested in everything about me and my life}]_{726-the man on the plane who was interested in everything about me and my life} . As if [he]_{726-the man on the plane who was interested in everything about me and my life} felt it , too , [we]_725-we nearly made out in the middle of [a crowded restaurant]_{728-a crowded restaurant} . [He]_{726-the man on the plane who was interested in everything about me and my life} ’s not wrong ; this attraction is insane . “ Hurry , ”_{[726-the man on the plane who was interested in everything about me and my life]} [I]_2959-i whisper against [his]_{726-the man on the plane who was interested in everything about me and my life} lips . It ’s one thing to go out to dinner with [a gorgeous man]_56-robbie — it ’s another to imagine [yourself]_730-yourself under the table , sucking [his]_56-robbie dick the entire time . [I]_2959-i do n’t know if it ’s that [he]_56-robbie told [me]_2959-i that [I]_2959-i was the best sex [he]_56-robbie ’s ever had , but . . . damn it , [I]_2959-i want to blow [his]_56-robbie frigging mind . [I]_2959-i ’m desperate to get [him]_56-robbie naked . [I]_2959-i want to be [that girl [he]_56-robbie turned [me]_2959-i into in [Boston]_{385-new york}]_{731-that girl he turned me into in boston} again . [I]_2959-i ’ve missed [her]_{731-that girl he turned me into in boston} . [We]_732-we turn the corner , and [I]_2959-i see [the big black limousine parked by [the curb]_{549-the curb}]_{385-new york} . [I]_2959-i stop still . “ What ? ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie frowns . “ [The limo]_{385-new york} is [here]_{385-new york} ? ”_[56-robbie] “ Yes . So ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_56-robbie for an extended moment . [He]_56-robbie rolls [his]_56-robbie eyes and opens the back door . “ Get in . ”_[56-robbie] [I]_2959-i climb in , and within two seconds , [he]_56-robbie ’s in [the car]_{369-the car} and has [me]_2959-i straddled over [his]_56-robbie lap with [my]_2959-i dress up around [my]_2959-i waist . The security screen is up , providing [us]_732-we with privacy . [His]_56-robbie cock is hard , and [he]_56-robbie grabs [my]_2959-i hip bones and guides [my]_2959-i sex back and forth over [him]_56-robbie as [we]_732-we kiss . [His]_56-robbie hands are on [my]_2959-i behind and then trailing up and down [my]_2959-i back as [my]_2959-i body takes on a rhythm of its own . [His]_56-robbie eyes are dark , and [his]_56-robbie fingers dip into [my]_2959-i panties , and [he]_56-robbie slides them through [my]_2959-i flesh . “ Fuck , ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie whispers . “ [I]_56-robbie could blow just by feeling this beautiful , hot pussy . ”_[56-robbie] [I]_2959-i begin to rock down on [him]_56-robbie with force , searching for a deeper connection , and [his]_56-robbie jaw hangs slack as [he]_56-robbie stares up at [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i do n’t know what the hell kind of nympho pills [someone]_2326-someone slipped into [my]_2959-i drink at dinner , but [I]_2959-i find [myself]_2959-i on the floor between [his]_56-robbie legs , and [I]_2959-i unzip [his]_56-robbie jeans with force . [He]_56-robbie hisses as [I]_2959-i push [him]_56-robbie back into [his]_56-robbie seat and spread [his]_56-robbie legs aggressively . [Our]_737-our eyes lock , and [I]_2959-i lick the end of [him]_56-robbie and taste the preejaculate as it oozes from [his]_56-robbie head . [He]_56-robbie cups [my]_2959-i face , and [I]_2959-i take [him]_56-robbie deep down [my]_2959-i throat as [he]_56-robbie clenches . “ Fuck , ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie growls in a whisper as [his]_56-robbie stomach contracts . “ Fucking hell , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_[56-robbie] [I]_2959-i begin to fist [him]_56-robbie hard , and [he]_56-robbie lurches underneath [me]_2959-i . [He]_56-robbie ’s going to come . [I]_2959-i want [him]_56-robbie to come hard , quick . . . and unbridled . [I]_2959-i need to own [him]_56-robbie tonight . Pleasing [him]_56-robbie makes [me]_2959-i feel good about [myself]_2959-i , and this new version of [Emily]_186-jameson is [someone [I]_2959-i like]_{738-someone i like} . [I]_2959-i want to keep [her]_186-jameson . “ [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie growls as [he]_56-robbie grabs a handful of [my]_2959-i hair . “ [We]_740-we ’re [home]_2289-home . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie pushes the lock down on the door just before [[his]_56-robbie driver]_{739-his driver} tries to open it . [I]_2959-i scramble to the seat , and [he]_56-robbie zips [his]_56-robbie jeans up as [we]_740-we both pant , gasping for air . What the hell ? [This man]_56-robbie makes [me]_2959-i an animal . [He]_56-robbie turns to [me]_2959-i and smirks as [he]_56-robbie fixes [my]_2959-i hair . “ Let ’s just get to [the apartment]_{2627-the apartment} , shall [we]_740-we ? ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie kisses [me]_2959-i tenderly ; [his]_56-robbie lips linger over [mine]_2959-i as [we]_740-we stare at each other . “ It ’s good to see [you]_56-robbie again , [Emily Foster]_186-jameson , ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie whispers . [I]_2959-i lick [my]_2959-i lips as [I]_2959-i climb back over to straddle [him]_56-robbie . “ It ’s good to taste [you]_56-robbie again , [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i rock [my]_2959-i sex over [him]_56-robbie , and [he]_56-robbie grabs [my]_2959-i hip bones and holds [me]_2959-i still . “ Stop , ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie commands . “ Stop now . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i put [my]_2959-i lips up to [his]_56-robbie ear . “ [I]_2959-i want [you]_56-robbie to blow [your]_56-robbie load in [[your]_56-robbie car]_{2628-your car} , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper before biting [him]_56-robbie . “ Fuck [me]_2959-i right here . ”_[2959-i] “ Jesus Christ . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie pushes [me]_2959-i off and opens the door in one swift movement , and [the driver]_{530-the driver} drops [his]_56-robbie head as [he]_{530-the driver} pretends not to know what [we]_742-we were doing in [there]_2369-there . “ Thank [you]_2959-i , ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson says as [he]_{530-the driver} pulls [me]_2959-i out and marches into [the building]_{375-the elevator} . [We]_742-we get into [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} , and [the attendant]_{278-the attendant} stares straight ahead . [I]_2959-i ’m panting , dripping wet , and [my]_2959-i sex is throbbing . [I]_2959-i ’m a hot mess . [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s eyes are dark as [he]_186-jameson stares straight ahead at the closed doors . [God]_0-aaron , [I]_2959-i need [him]_186-jameson . The doors open , and [he]_186-jameson pulls [me]_2959-i out by the hand . [Our]_742-we lips are locked , and [he]_186-jameson walks [me]_2959-i into [[his]_186-jameson apartment]_{514-the room} backward . “ Is n’t this how [we]_742-we got into [the room]_{514-the room} last time ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i smile as [he]_186-jameson lifts [me]_2959-i . “ Similar . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson puts [me]_2959-i down , and [I]_2959-i look around , and [my]_2959-i heart drops . “ What the hell , [Jim]_266-jim ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper through shock . “ What ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson frowns . “ This is [[your]_266-jim house]_{2529-your house} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask as [my]_2959-i eyes scan [the room]_{2627-the apartment} . [His]_186-jameson lips drop to [my]_2959-i neck as [he]_186-jameson licks and sucks down [my]_2959-i collarbone ; [he]_186-jameson ’s completely preoccupied . [The apartment]_{2627-the apartment} is huge and modern , with floor - to - ceiling windows and the lights of [New York]_{385-new york} twinkling everywhere [I]_2959-i look . Lamps are strategically placed to give a warm feeling . [I]_2959-i ’ve never been anywhere so beautiful . . . or foreign . The floors are a light timber parquetry , and luxurious velvet and leather furnishings fill the space . [The living room]_{2627-the apartment} has a fireplace with a huge gilded mirror hanging over it and a beautiful antique rug . “ Stop looking at [the apartment]_{2627-the apartment} , and look at [me]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson grabs [my]_2959-i face and drags it back to [his]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_186-jameson . “ What ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson murmurs . “ [This apartment]_{2627-the apartment} . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ What about it ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [You]_186-jameson come from [a different world]_{2630-a different world} than [me]_2959-i , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ Who cares ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ [I]_748-our want [you]_186-jameson , and [you]_186-jameson want [me]_748-our . What else is there ? ”_[748-our] [Our]_748-our kiss turns desperate as [he]_186-jameson slams [me]_2959-i up against the wall and tears [my]_2959-i dress from [my]_2959-i body in one quick movement . [I]_2959-i push [his]_186-jameson jacket over [his]_186-jameson shoulders and grab [his]_186-jameson T - shirt and lift it off and then unzip [his]_186-jameson jeans , and [he]_186-jameson kicks them to the side . [We]_748-our stare at each other , both in [our]_748-our underwear , both panting , both craving a deeper connection . It ’s like Christmas morning . . . only better . Next thing [I]_2959-i know , [I]_2959-i ’m being dragged through [[his]_186-jameson apartment]_{2494-his apartment} and thrown onto the bed . [He]_186-jameson tears [my]_2959-i underwear from [my]_2959-i body . [His]_186-jameson hungry gaze drops down the length of [my]_2959-i body as [he]_186-jameson drinks [me]_2959-i in . And there it is — the heat that [this man]_186-jameson creates with [his]_186-jameson stare could light up the earth . The way [he]_186-jameson looks at [me]_2959-i is something [I]_2959-i ’ve never forgotten . [He]_186-jameson lifts [my]_2959-i legs and puts them around [his]_186-jameson waist and then begins to slide [his]_186-jameson thick cock through [my]_2959-i swollen flesh . A sexy smile crosses [his]_186-jameson face as [he]_186-jameson looks down at [me]_2959-i . “ [I]_186-jameson remember now . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [You]_186-jameson remember what ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ What the F stands for in [your]_186-jameson initials . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ What ’s that ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Fuck bunny . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i burst out laughing . “ [I]_2959-i ’d forgotten about that . ”_[2959-i] “ How could [you]_186-jameson forget anything ? Every detail from that night is burned into [my]_186-jameson brain . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson hands [me]_2959-i a condom . “ Put it on [me]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [My]_2959-i lips softly kiss [his]_186-jameson dick before [I]_2959-i follow [his]_186-jameson instruction . So bossy . “ Like what ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i whisper up at [him]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i lie down , and [he]_186-jameson crawls back over [me]_2959-i . “ Like the way [you]_186-jameson looked at [me]_186-jameson , the way [you]_186-jameson tasted under [my]_186-jameson tongue . ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson lips take [mine]_2959-i , and [our]_750-our kiss deepens . “ [I]_186-jameson remember how every muscle deep inside [you]_186-jameson felt when [your]_186-jameson body rippled around [mine]_2959-i . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i smile up at [him]_186-jameson in wonder as [I]_2959-i run [my]_2959-i fingers through [his]_186-jameson stubble . Please do n’t be any more gorgeous . [I]_2959-i wo n’t be able to deal with [you]_186-jameson at all . “ But it was the way [you]_186-jameson kissed [me]_2959-i that [I]_2959-i remember the most . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes search [his]_186-jameson . “ How did [I]_2959-i kiss [you]_186-jameson ? ”_[2959-i] “ Like [you]_186-jameson ’d been waiting [your]_186-jameson whole life to kiss [me]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson slides in deep , and [my]_2959-i heart constricts . [I]_2959-i bring [my]_2959-i legs higher . “ Maybe [I]_2959-i had . ”_[2959-i] [We]_751-we stare at each other , [his]_186-jameson body inside [mine]_2959-i , and even though [I]_2959-i know that this is just sex and that it means nothing , it feels intimate and special . . . more than it should . Stop it . Stop overthinking this . “ Are [you]_186-jameson going to keep jabbering on , or are [you]_186-jameson going to fuck [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i tease to lighten the moment . [He]_186-jameson chuckles and pulls out and slams into [me]_2959-i , knocking the air from [my]_2959-i lungs . [I]_2959-i cry out . Oh . . . dear God . [I]_2959-i think [I]_2959-i just woke [the devil]_{2540-the devil} . [He]_186-jameson pumps [me]_2959-i with [his]_186-jameson knees spread wide , harder and harder , and with every slam [he]_186-jameson lifts [my]_2959-i legs a little higher and a little wider . [He]_186-jameson holds [himself]_186-jameson still and then circles deep inside [me]_2959-i . [My]_2959-i head tips back to the sky as [I]_2959-i lose all coherent thought . “ Oh God , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whimper as [his]_186-jameson teeth graze [my]_2959-i neck . “ That ’s so good . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson keeps doing the delicious movement as [his]_186-jameson thumb circles over [my]_2959-i clitoris . [My]_2959-i body begins to shudder , and [he]_186-jameson grabs [my]_2959-i face and brings it to [his]_186-jameson . [Our]_753-our eyes lock as [my]_2959-i body arches and writhes beneath [him]_186-jameson . “ Look at [me]_186-jameson while [you]_186-jameson come on [my]_186-jameson cock , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson commands as [he]_186-jameson straightens [his]_186-jameson arms and puts [my]_2959-i legs over [his]_186-jameson shoulders . The change in position deepens [him]_186-jameson inside of [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i convulse as [he]_186-jameson slams into [me]_2959-i . [His]_186-jameson body begins to take [mine]_2959-i at piston pace , and [I]_2959-i grip [his]_186-jameson arms as [I]_2959-i stare up at [him]_186-jameson . “ Fuck yeah , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson growls . “ Fuck . . . fuck . . . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson tips [his]_186-jameson head back and cries out as [I]_2959-i feel the telling jerk as [he]_186-jameson comes deep inside [me]_2959-i . [We]_754-we ’re wet with perspiration , and [he]_186-jameson bends and tenderly takes [my]_2959-i lips with [his]_186-jameson . [My]_2959-i heart races out of control as [I]_2959-i stare at the ceiling , gasping for air . [His]_186-jameson head is in [my]_2959-i neck , [his]_186-jameson lips trailing along [my]_2959-i collarbone . What the fuck was that ? That was n’t sex — that was an apocalyptic event . [I]_2959-i ’m ruined . [I]_2959-i wake in the darkness ; the glow of the [New York]_{385-new york} city lights illuminates through [the room]_{514-the room} . It ’s late — or early . About four in the morning , [I]_2959-i think . [We]_754-we did n’t shut the drapes before going to sleep . What a night . [We]_754-we devoured each other until [we]_754-we had nothing left . [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_186-jameson as [he]_186-jameson lies flat on [his]_186-jameson back in an exhausted sleep . [I]_2959-i do n’t know what [we]_754-we are to each other , but [I]_2959-i do know that [he]_186-jameson ’s [[my]_2959-i sexual soul mate]_{756-my sexual soul mate} . Is that even a thing ? [Our]_754-we bodies are like animals with each other ; [neither of [us]_754-we]_{757-neither of us} could get enough . The thirst just could n’t be quenched . If [he]_186-jameson were to wake up now , [I]_2959-i would be instantly aroused , as [I]_2959-i know [he]_186-jameson would be . [He]_186-jameson ’s right , this is primal . [I]_2959-i ’m thirsty , so [I]_2959-i climb out of bed and throw on [his]_186-jameson robe and make [my]_2959-i way out to [the kitchen]_{2627-the apartment} in search of water . [We]_754-we left the lamps on , so [the rooms]_{2627-the apartment} are partially lit . [I]_2959-i do n’t even remember getting to [the bedroom]_{2627-the apartment} . [I]_2959-i find a glass and pour [myself]_2959-i some water from the fridge , and as [I]_2959-i look around , [my]_2959-i heart drops . What the hell kind of [kitchen]_759-kitchen is this ? It ’s like [a restaurant]_{760-a restaurant} . [I]_2959-i walk back out to [the living room]_{2627-the apartment} and stare out over [the city]_{2-the city} way down below . [My]_2959-i eyes roam over [the apartment]_{2627-the apartment} , and [my]_2959-i heart flutters . This is real money . Stupid money . [[My]_2959-i entire apartment]_{2627-the apartment} would fit into [[his]_{2627-the apartment} bedroom]_{2627-the apartment} alone . What does a place like this cost ? [Our]_754-we clothes are strewn all over the floor , and [I]_2959-i pick them up and fold them and put them onto the coffee table . [I]_2959-i see something light up on the floor . [I]_2959-i frown and bend to pick up [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s phone . It must have fallen out of [his]_186-jameson pocket as [we]_754-we were undressing . The screen lights up as a message comes through , and the name [Chloe]_135-chloe flashes on the screen . Where are [you]_762-you ? Did [your]_762-you meeting go late ? [I]_2959-i stare at the phone . What the fuck ? Who ’s [Chloe]_135-chloe ? [Jameson]_186-jameson [I]_2959-i wake to the sound of [my]_2959-i alarm , and [I]_2959-i smile as [I]_2959-i stretch ; [I]_2959-i ’m sated and sleepy . Relaxed for the first time in a long time . What a night . . . what [a woman]_{339-a woman} . [I]_2959-i reach for [Emily]_186-jameson and frown when [I]_2959-i realize [she]_186-jameson ’s not in bed with [me]_2959-i . [She]_186-jameson must be in [the bathroom]_{300-the bathroom} . [I]_2959-i doze for another twenty minutes , and eventually when [she]_186-jameson does n’t return , [I]_2959-i get up . “ [Emily]_186-jameson ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i call as [I]_2959-i walk into [the bathroom]_{300-the bathroom} . It ’s empty . [I]_2959-i walk out into [the living area]_{765-the living area} . “ [Emily]_186-jameson ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i call . Silence . “ Where is [she]_186-jameson ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i look around to see [my]_2959-i clothes folded on the coffee table and notice that [hers]_186-jameson . . . are gone . “ [Emily]_186-jameson ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i call as [I]_2959-i do a 360 of [[my]_2959-i apartment]_{766-my apartment} . “ [Emily]_186-jameson ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i clench [my]_2959-i jaw as [my]_2959-i anger begins to escalate . [I]_2959-i dial [her]_186-jameson number as a shade of red clouds [my]_2959-i vision . [I]_2959-i hear [my]_2959-i furious heartbeat in [my]_2959-i ears as adrenaline fills [my]_2959-i bloodstream . “ Hello , ”_{[186-jameson]} [she]_186-jameson answers . “ Where the fuck are [you]_186-jameson ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sneer . Chapter 8 [Jameson]_186-jameson “ [I]_186-jameson had to go , ”_{[186-jameson]} [she]_186-jameson stammers . “ Why ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [I]_186-jameson needed to be at work early . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [You]_186-jameson did n’t think to wake [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . “ [You]_186-jameson piss [me]_2959-i off . ”_[2959-i] “ Do n’t start [your]_186-jameson righteous shit with [me]_186-jameson . [I]_186-jameson ’ll leave when [I]_186-jameson fucking want to . ”_{[186-jameson]} The phone goes dead . [I]_2959-i inhale sharply ; [nobody]_2321-nobody hangs up on [me]_2959-i . [Nobody]_2321-nobody . [I]_2959-i clench [my]_2959-i jaw and throw [my]_2959-i phone onto the couch . [This woman]_186-jameson is fucking infuriating . [I]_2959-i walk into [[my]_2959-i office]_{455-my office} , open [my]_2959-i laptop , and log in to [my]_2959-i security footage . [I]_2959-i take a seat as [I]_2959-i wait for it to load . An image of [my]_2959-i front door comes up , and [I]_2959-i hit rewind and watch as it goes back in fast - forward . [I]_2959-i catch sight of [her]_186-jameson leaving , and [I]_2959-i stop the film . What time was it ? It was 3:58 a.m. [She]_186-jameson had to go to work early ? Bullshit . [She]_186-jameson waited for [me]_2959-i to fall asleep and then immediately left . [I]_2959-i sit back in [my]_2959-i chair as [my]_2959-i anger escalates . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t know what the fuck [you]_2631-you ’re playing at , [Emily Foster]_186-jameson , but [I]_2959-i wo n’t have it . If [you]_2631-you ’re with [me]_2959-i , [you]_2631-you ’re with [me]_2959-i . And [you]_2631-you ’ll do as [I]_2959-i fucking say . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i slam [my]_2959-i computer shut and storm [upstairs]_{2392-upstairs} . [She]_186-jameson ’s looking for a fight . [She]_186-jameson just found one . An hour later , [I]_2959-i walk through [the foyer of [[my]_2959-i building]_{703-my building}]_{770-the foyer of my building} and out to [[my]_2959-i car]_{2625-my car} . “ Good morning , [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} . ”_[246-alan] [Alan]_246-alan smiles as [he]_246-alan opens the door of [[my]_2959-i limo]_{2625-my car} . “ Morning , ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i say as [I]_2959-i get in . The usual pile of newspapers is on the seat , along with [my]_2959-i coffee , and [I]_2959-i begin [my]_2959-i morning ritual . It takes [us]_773-our forty minutes to drive the thirteen miles to [[my]_2959-i building]_{703-my building} , so [I]_2959-i use this time to keep track of [[our]_773-our competitors]_{2568-our competitors} . [I]_2959-i flick through the pile and pick up [the Gazette]_{596-the gazette} , [[our]_773-our closest competitor]_{776-our closest competitor} , and [I]_2959-i scan the front page . “ Their formatting is appalling , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i mutter under [my]_2959-i breath as [I]_2959-i flick it open . [I]_2959-i read page one and two , and then [I]_2959-i get to page three . Breaking News [The NYPD]_{777-the nypd} has closed in on a top - secret investigation . The murder was originally attributed to [a man police had nicknamed [Stoneface]_{138-stoneface} , who has been linked to more than 85 burglaries in [Brooklyn]_13-brooklyn , [New York]_{385-new york}]_{778-a man police had nicknamed stoneface , who has been linked to more than 85 burglaries in brooklyn , new york} . But with DNA evidence , [investigators]_{779-investigators} now believe the crimes were committed by [the same suspect that has been called [the Red Ribbon Killer in other parts of [the state]_{781-the state}]_{780-the red ribbon killer}]_{780-the red ribbon killer} . “ With this filing , [we]_2632-we have officially linked [Stoneface]_{138-stoneface} to [an individual known as the Red Ribbon Killer]_{2633-an individual known as the red ribbon killer} , ”_{[139-matthew]} said [Matthew Price]_139-matthew , [[Brooklyn County]_{22-brooklyn county} district attorney]_{782-brooklyn county district attorney} . [Stoneface]_{138-stoneface} , [an auto mechanic]_{783-an auto mechanic} , is wanted after [police]_784-police tracked [him]_{138-stoneface} down by matching [his]_{138-stoneface} DNA with a genealogy website . [He]_{138-stoneface} has been accused of killing 5 and raping [45 people]_{785-45 people} in what [police]_784-police are describing as a premeditated crime spree . [He]_{138-stoneface} was nicknamed [the Red Ribbon Killer]_{780-the red ribbon killer} because [the victims]_{786-the victims} had a red ribbon tied around [their]_{786-the victims} neck after [they]_{786-the victims} were murdered . [Police]_784-police have tracked [his]_{138-stoneface} whereabouts , and an arrest is expected today . “ Fuck . ”_{[186-jameson]} It ’s [Emily]_186-jameson ’s story , just worded differently . [I]_2959-i take out [my]_2959-i phone and call [Tristan]_2430-tristan as [my]_2959-i blood pressure rises to boiling point . “ Hey , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [he]_2430-tristan answers . “ Page three of the Gazette , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . “ [You]_2430-tristan ’re joking ? ”_[2959-i] “ Nope . ”_[135-chloe] “ Fucking hell . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan sighs . “ See [you]_2430-tristan soon . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [I]_2959-i hang up , and [my]_2959-i phone vibrates . The name [Chloe]_135-chloe lights up the screen ; [I]_2959-i hit decline . [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i coffee and stare out the window as contempt drips from [my]_2959-i every pore . It ’s one thing to be deceived , but to be sold out by [one of [[our]_788-our own staff members]_{789-our own staff members}]_{787-one of our own staff members} is a whole new level of betrayal . When [I]_2959-i get [my]_2959-i hands on [whoever]_790-whoever is responsible for this , there will be fucking hell to pay . Half an hour later , [I]_2959-i walk into [[my]_2959-i office]_{455-my office} and find three of [[my]_2959-i favorite people]_{792-my favorite people} inside . [[My]_2959-i brothers]_{2616-my brothers} . “ Hello . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smirk . “ [Jesus]_107-jesus , [you]_107-jesus ’ve both got uglier since [I]_{2616-my brothers} last saw [you]_107-jesus . [I]_{2616-my brothers} did n’t think it was possible . ”_{[2616-my brothers]} [They]_{2616-my brothers} chuckle , and [we]_788-our hug . [I]_2959-i miss [[my]_2959-i brothers]_{2616-my brothers} . [Their]_{2616-my brothers} role in [the company]_{2358-the company} requires [them]_{2616-my brothers} to live in [the UK]_{795-the uk} ; [they]_{2616-my brothers} work out of [the London office]_2369-there . [I]_2959-i only get to see [them]_{2616-my brothers} once a month when [I]_2959-i travel over [there]_2369-there , [Tristan]_2430-tristan the same . Although [he]_2430-tristan gets to stay longer , so [he]_2430-tristan gets more time with [them]_{2616-my brothers} . [I]_2959-i slap the Gazette onto [my]_2959-i desk . “ What the hell is this ? ”_[2959-i] “ Fucking hell , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan whispers as [they]_{2616-my brothers} all take a seat around the board table . “ What ’s going on ? ”_[140-elliot] [Elliot]_140-elliot snaps . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t believe this . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i exhale heavily . “ [We]_2634-we got [a new staff member]_{2400-a new staff member} , [Emily Foster]_186-jameson . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan smirks , and [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes . “ And ? ”_{[141-christopher]} [Christopher]_{141-christopher} interrupts . “ [She]_186-jameson ran a story on [her]_186-jameson second day and was n’t sure of the name of [the suspect]_{2636-the suspect} , so [she]_186-jameson made one up on the spot and planned on changing it when [she]_186-jameson got back to [the office]_{385-new york} . ”_{[2616-my brothers]} [They]_{2616-my brothers} frown as [they]_{2616-my brothers} listen . “ Only [she]_186-jameson forgot . ”_{[2616-my brothers]} “ [Jesus]_107-jesus . ”_[140-elliot] [Elliot]_140-elliot rolls [his]_140-elliot eyes . “ Useless . ”_[140-elliot] “ No , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan says . “ Diabolical . The exact same story ran in the Gazette the next day . . . with the bogus name . ”_[140-elliot] [Elliot]_140-elliot and [Christopher]_{141-christopher} frown as [they]_{2616-my brothers} listen . “ How do [you]_2430-tristan know this ? ”_{[141-christopher]} [Christopher]_{141-christopher} asks . “ [I]_2959-i know [the reporter]_{2638-the reporter} . [We]_797-we met a while ago . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pause , not wanting to elaborate . “ [You]_2430-tristan know who [she]_{2638-the reporter} is ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan smirks . “ Who ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Elliot]_140-elliot ’s eyes flick between [us]_797-we . “ Remember ages ago [Jay]_108-jay got [a motherfucking huge hickey]_{2639-a motherfucking huge hickey} ? ”_{[2616-my brothers]} [Their]_{2616-my brothers} faces fall . “ No . ”_[140-elliot] [Elliot]_140-elliot pinches the bridge of [his]_140-elliot nose . “ Please . . . do n’t tell [me]_140-elliot . ”_[140-elliot] [He]_140-elliot laughs out loud . “ What did [you]_140-elliot call it ? Stopover shame . ”_[140-elliot] “ [I]_2959-i had to wear a fucking turtleneck for two weeks . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sigh in disgust . “ Remember the black - tie dinner for [[Mom]_70-mom ’s charity]_{2640-mom ’s charity} ? ”_[2959-i] [Tristan]_2430-tristan throws [his]_140-elliot head back and laughs . “ And [you]_140-elliot had the hugest hickey [anyone]_272-anyone had ever seen . ”_[140-elliot] [He]_140-elliot chuckles at the memory . “ And [you]_140-elliot had to hide from [Mom]_70-mom all night and wear cover - up on [your]_140-elliot neck . That was fucking hilarious , [man]_2430-tristan . ”_[140-elliot] “ [Mortifying]_{143-mortifying} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shiver as [I]_2959-i think back . “ Anyway , back to the story . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i glare at [Tristan]_2430-tristan for bringing it up . “ [Emily]_186-jameson — that ’s [her]_186-jameson name — unbeknownst to [me]_2959-i got a job [here]_{385-new york} . [She]_186-jameson started three weeks ago , and then this mishap with the name happened . [She]_186-jameson came to [me]_2959-i with suspicions that something fishy was going on . A fake name that [she]_186-jameson made up on the spot was no coincidence . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i look around at [[my]_2959-i brothers]_{2616-my brothers} . “ [Our]_{2616-my brothers} stories are being sold on [the black market]_{2644-the black market} . ”_[2959-i] “ For fuck ’s sake , ”_[140-elliot] [Elliot]_140-elliot snaps . “ [Our]_{2616-my brothers} share prices are dropping because [we]_{2616-my brothers} are no longer breaking news . ”_[140-elliot] [Elliot]_140-elliot shakes [his]_140-elliot head in disgust . “ Because the reporters that [we]_{2616-my brothers} are paying for are working for [our]_{2616-my brothers} competition , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan snaps . “ [We]_{2616-my brothers} tested the theory this week . [We]_{2616-my brothers} got [Emily]_186-jameson to write a bogus story and submit it through the regular channels , and look . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i hit the paper with the backs of [my]_2959-i fingers . “ Here it is , page three of the Gazette . ”_[2959-i] [They]_799-they all stare at the paper in front of [us]_800-we , deep in thought . “ So . . . what do [we]_800-we do ? ”_[799-they] “ Firing [everyone]_{2304-everyone} works for [me]_2959-i , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . “ No , [we]_800-we have to do this properly . There are [a hundred people on that floor]_{2646-a hundred people on that floor} . Not to mention IT and [the mailroom]_{2647-the mailroom} . ”_{[801-the boys]} [The boys]_{801-the boys} break into chatter as [they]_{801-the boys} discuss [our]_800-we options . [I]_2959-i push [my]_2959-i intercom . “ Can [we]_800-we get [Richard]_246-alan from legal up here , please ? ”_[2959-i] “ Yes , [sir]_246-alan . ”_[2959-i] “ Should [Emily]_186-jameson write another story so [we]_800-we can track it more closely ? ”_[140-elliot] [Elliot]_140-elliot asks . “ No , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . “ [I]_2430-tristan do n’t want [her]_186-jameson involved again . [I]_2430-tristan do n’t want [her]_186-jameson up here at all . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan smirks . “ [I]_2959-i ’m going to wipe that stupid smirk off [your]_2430-tristan face in a minute , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . “ Scared [she]_186-jameson ’s going to give [you]_2430-tristan another hickey ? ”_[140-elliot] [Elliot]_140-elliot jokes . “ Must have some pretty good suction going on . ”_[802-they] [They]_802-they all laugh . [I]_2959-i glare at [him]_140-elliot . “ Cut the shit . [I]_2959-i ’m not in the fucking mood for this today . ”_[2959-i] There is a knock on the door . “ Come in , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i call . [Richard]_246-alan comes into view . “ Please take a seat . ”_[246-alan] “ How can [I]_140-elliot help [you]_2430-tristan ? ”_[140-elliot] [He]_140-elliot smiles . “ [We]_803-we have reason to believe that [someone on the news floor]_{2648-someone on the news floor} is selling [our]_803-we stories to [a competitor]_{2649-a competitor} . How do [we]_803-we legally handle this ? ”_[246-alan] [Richard]_246-alan frowns as [he]_140-elliot looks between [us]_803-we . “ Are [you]_2430-tristan sure ? ”_[246-alan] “ Yes . ”_[140-elliot] “ Well . ”_[140-elliot] [He]_140-elliot exhales as [he]_140-elliot thinks . “ [You]_2430-tristan would hire [a corporate investigation firm]_{2650-a corporate investigation firm} . ”_[140-elliot] “ What do [they]_{2651-professionals} do ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ [They]_{2651-professionals} are [business - centric]_{2652-business - centric} and can involve verifying the legitimacy of [a business partner]_{2653-a business partner} or deal , looking into loss or theft of proprietary information , identifying the potential of a damaged reputation , things like that . ”_[2959-i] “ No , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say as [I]_2959-i stand . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t want [a stranger]_{2330-a stranger} in here sniffing around . What if the story breaks ? It will do more damage to [our]_803-we reputation . ”_[2959-i] “ With all due respect , [Jameson]_186-jameson , [I]_246-alan do n’t see how [you]_2430-tristan have any other choice , ”_[246-alan] [Richard]_246-alan says . “ Do [you]_2430-tristan know any ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan asks . “ No . But [I]_2430-tristan can find out who to use . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ [I]_246-alan do n’t like it . ”_[246-alan] “ [They]_{2651-professionals} ’re [professionals]_{2651-professionals} . [They]_{2651-professionals} deal with things like this all the time . [You]_2430-tristan wo n’t even know [they]_{2651-professionals} are in [the building]_{361-the building} , ”_[246-alan] [Richard]_246-alan continues . “ How does it work ? ”_[246-alan] “ [They]_{2651-professionals} usually come in undercover , act as [one of [the workers]_{2657-the workers}]_{2656-one of the workers} while [they]_{2651-professionals} watch and trace . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes in disgust . “ How ridiculous . This is n’t a fucking MacGyver episode . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stare at [[my]_2959-i brothers]_{2616-my brothers} , and [I]_2959-i know [I]_2959-i ’ve been forced into a corner . There is no other way around this , and [I]_2959-i know [I]_2959-i must concede . “ Fine . ”_{[186-jameson]} [Emily]_186-jameson An hour earlier [I]_2959-i power walk up [the street]_{550-the street} among [the crowd]_{265-the crowd} . [I]_2959-i ’ll never get used to these busy [New York]_{385-new york} sidewalks no matter how long [I]_2959-i live [here]_{385-new york} . [I]_2959-i ’m exhausted . [I]_2959-i was up half the night having sex , and [I]_2959-i have n’t been back to sleep since [I]_2959-i left [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s at four o’clock . God , what a nightmare this whole situation is . And who the fuck is [Chloe]_135-chloe ? [I]_2959-i order [my]_2959-i iced coffee , and as [I]_2959-i wait , [I]_2959-i buy the Gazette at the newsstand . [I]_2959-i ’ll read it at lunch . [I]_2959-i wonder if [they]_808-they have any jobs available . [I]_2959-i ’m probably going to need one soon . With a heavy heart , [my]_2959-i mind goes to [Jameson]_186-jameson . Damn it , why does something always have to go wrong with [the men [I]_2959-i like]_{809-the men i like} ? If only [he]_810-he were just [a normal guy]_{811-a normal guy} — with [a normal shitty apartment]_{812-a normal shitty apartment} and [a shitty car]_{813-a shitty car} and [no women]_{814-no women} texting [him]_810-he — [he]_810-he would be perfect . In every way . [I]_2959-i get a vision of [us]_815-we last night as [we]_815-we made love and kissed for hours , and sadness sweeps over [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i hate that [we]_815-we connect so deeply on a physical level . It ’s just sex , [you]_816-you idiot . Bone - shattering , awesome , toe - curling sex . [I]_2959-i imagine [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson would have that with [every woman [he]_186-jameson ’s with]_{817-every woman he ’s with} . [He]_186-jameson ’s that kind of guy with that kind of a dick . [Ugh]_61-ugh . [I]_2959-i take [my]_2959-i coffee and make the depressing walk to [the office]_{385-new york} . [I]_2959-i ’m not thinking about [him]_186-jameson today , and [I]_2959-i ’m most definitely not telling [him]_186-jameson that [I]_2959-i know about [Chloe]_135-chloe . [Whoever Chloe]_135-chloe is . All [I]_2959-i know is that if [she]_135-chloe ’s texting [him]_186-jameson with where - are - [you]_819-you messages in the middle of the night , something ’s going on , and [he]_186-jameson ’s all [hers]_135-chloe . [She]_135-chloe can have [him]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i may be a lot of things , but [a man stealer [I]_2959-i ’m not]_{820-a man stealer i ’m not} . [Douchebag]_{144-douchebag} . How dare [he]_186-jameson use [me]_2959-i for sex ? The bitter taste of betrayal lines [my]_2959-i mouth ; [I]_2959-i can act brave all [I]_2959-i want , but the truth is [I]_2959-i ’m upset . Last night was perfect — more than perfect — and then [he]_186-jameson had to go and wreck it . [I]_2959-i thought [I]_2959-i spent the night with [Jim]_266-jim , but instead [I]_2959-i got the sleazebag [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson version . How did n’t [I]_2959-i see it ? [I]_2959-i trudge into [the building]_{361-the building} and up to [my]_2959-i floor , and [I]_2959-i fall into [my]_2959-i seat in disgust . “ Hi , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say . “ Hey . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron spins on [his]_0-aaron chair toward [me]_2959-i . “ How did it go ? ”_[0-aaron] [I]_2959-i glance up at the camera above . Is [he]_0-aaron watching ? “ Good , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i lie . “ [I]_2959-i ’ll tell [you]_2959-i about it tonight . [We]_2658-we are drinking . ”_[2959-i] “ Drinking ? ”_[0-aaron] “ Everything [we]_2658-we see . ”_[0-aaron] [His]_0-aaron face falls . “ Oh . . . it went that kind of good . ”_[0-aaron] “ Precisely , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i mutter flatly . “ What ’s going on around here today ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron whispers . “ What do [you]_2959-i mean ? ”_[0-aaron] [I]_2959-i look up from [my]_2959-i computer . “ [Tristan]_2430-tristan is buzzing around , and [Jameson]_186-jameson has been down to the floor already . ”_[2959-i] “ What time is it ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i glance at [my]_2959-i watch . “ It ’s only eight forty - five . [They]_2658-we are never down here at this hour , if at all . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i know . ”_[2959-i] “ Hmm . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i watch [Tristan]_2430-tristan as [he]_2430-tristan talks to [the floor manager]_{491-the floor manager} , and [he]_2430-tristan seems to have a stern face on . “ Do [you]_2959-i think something ’s wrong ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t know . Did [you]_2959-i piss [Mr. J]_127-j off last night ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smirk . “ Maybe [he]_2430-tristan ’s [upstairs]_{2392-upstairs} throwing a tantrum . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i ’m probably about to get fired . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile happily as [I]_2959-i open [my]_2959-i computer . Good , [I]_2959-i hope [he]_2430-tristan ’s pissed . Two hours later , [I]_2959-i glance up and see [two men [I]_2959-i have n’t seen before]_{823-two men i have n’t seen before} . “ Who are [they]_{823-two men i have n’t seen before} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [Molly]_198-molly looks up , and [her]_198-molly face falls . “ Oh [Lord]_2660-lord have mercy . . . thank [you]_2660-lord , [God]_0-aaron . ”_[198-molly] “ Huh ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ That ’s [Elliot]_140-elliot and [Christopher Miles]_{141-christopher} . [They]_{823-two men i have n’t seen before} ’ve flown in from [the UK]_{795-the uk} . Must be a board meeting or something going on this week . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes widen . “ [[Jameson]_186-jameson ’s brothers]_{2662-jameson ’s brothers} ? ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly smiles dreamily as [she]_198-molly watches [them]_{823-two men i have n’t seen before} . “ Uh - huh . ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly looks over to [Aaron]_0-aaron , who is also openly staring . “ [I]_198-molly call [Elliot]_140-elliot . ”_[198-molly] “ Good , because [I]_0-aaron call [Christopher]_{141-christopher} , ”_[0-aaron] [he]_0-aaron whispers right back . “ Can [you]_{141-christopher} please set [us]_2663-us up on a brother date ? ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly whispers . “ Yes , and [we]_2663-us need to swing , ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron replies . “ Because [I]_0-aaron want all four . [I]_0-aaron ca n’t choose . ”_[0-aaron] “ Can [you]_{141-christopher} imagine ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly murmurs . “ Makes [me]_198-molly blush just thinking of it . ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly fans [her]_198-molly face with [her]_198-molly manila folder as [her]_198-molly eyes stay glued to [the brothers]_{824-the miles brothers} . “ Imagine all of [them]_{824-the miles brothers} in bed together . . . taking turns with [your]_{141-christopher} body . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes in disgust . “ [The Miles brothers]_{824-the miles brothers} are overrated , if [you]_{141-christopher} ask [me]_{824-the miles brothers} . ”_{[824-the miles brothers]} [They]_{824-the miles brothers} ’re not , though . [I]_2959-i ’m lying through [my]_2959-i teeth . All with dark hair , tall , and built . . . square jaws in [their]_{824-the miles brothers} designer playboy suits . Everything about the four of [them]_{824-the miles brothers} screams power and gorgeousness . [Assholes]_145-assholes . [Jameson]_186-jameson has n’t been to see [me]_2959-i today . [I]_2959-i have n’t heard from [him]_186-jameson , and if the truth be known , [he]_186-jameson ’s probably [upstairs]_{2392-upstairs} making out on [his]_186-jameson office couch with [Chloe]_135-chloe as [we]_826-we speak . [Ugh]_61-ugh . [I]_2959-i ’m off [all men]_{2306-all men} . How could [I]_2959-i have been so stupid ? 4:30 p.m. “ Oh [my]_198-molly God , did [you]_198-molly see the story in [the Gazette]_{596-the gazette} ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly says . “ No , what ? ”_[198-molly] “ [The Red Ribbon Killer]_{780-the red ribbon killer} . [I]_2959-i do n’t even feel safe on [the subway]_{2666-the subway} tonight . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes flick to [her]_198-molly . “ What ? ”_[2959-i] “ Yeah , it ’s one of [their]_828-their lead stories today . [I]_198-molly was reading it online just now . ”_[198-molly] “ Are [you]_198-molly kidding [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i click onto [their]_828-their website and search for the story , and sure enough , the story comes up , almost word for word . . . [my]_2959-i words . [I]_2959-i put [my]_2959-i hand over [my]_2959-i mouth in horror as [I]_2959-i read it . Oh [[my]_2959-i God]_{2363-my god} . That ’s why [they]_830-they ’re all [here]_{385-new york} today ; [they]_830-they ’re in damage control . [I]_2959-i stare at the story on [my]_2959-i computer . It ’s there in black and white , but [I]_2959-i ca n’t actually believe it . [I]_2959-i look at [all the people in [the office]_{2600-jameson ’s office}]_{832-all the people in the office} acting calm and professional . Who is it ? [Thieving bastard]_56-robbie . “ [I]_56-robbie ’ve got to go and see [someone]_2326-someone . Back in a minute . ”_[56-robbie] [I]_2959-i practically run to [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} and take it to the top floor . Why did n’t [he]_56-robbie say anything to [me]_2959-i ? “ Hello , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say as [I]_2959-i brush through reception . “ Excuse [me]_{625-the receptionist} , [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_{[625-the receptionist]} [the receptionist]_{625-the receptionist} calls . “ [He]_56-robbie ’s not taking [visitors]_{2398-visitors} right now . ”_{[625-the receptionist]} “ Whatever . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i storm through to [[Jameson]_186-jameson ’s office]_{2600-jameson ’s office} , and [I]_2959-i knock on the door . “ Yes ? ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie barks . [I]_2959-i open the door to find [him]_56-robbie sitting behind [his]_56-robbie large desk ; blue eyes rise to meet [mine]_2959-i . “ What is it ? ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie asks coldly . [I]_2959-i walk in and close the door behind [me]_2959-i . “ [I]_2959-i saw the story . ”_[2959-i] “ And ? ”_[56-robbie] “ Well . . . why did n’t [you]_186-jameson tell [me]_56-robbie ? It was [my]_56-robbie story . [I]_56-robbie thought [you]_186-jameson would have at least told [me]_56-robbie . ”_[56-robbie] “ [Ms. Foster]_{126-ms. foster} . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie clenches [his]_56-robbie jaw as if [I]_2959-i ’m a huge annoyance . “ [I]_56-robbie do n’t have time to play [your]_{126-ms. foster} juvenile games . ”_[56-robbie] “ What does that mean ? ”_[56-robbie] “ It means [I]_56-robbie ’m very busy . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie goes back to typing . [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_56-robbie for a moment . What ? “ Close the door on [your]_{126-ms. foster} way out , please . ”_[56-robbie] The fucking nerve of [this man]_56-robbie . [He]_56-robbie sleeps with [me]_2959-i while [he]_56-robbie ’s seeing [someone else]_{433-someone else} and then has the audacity to treat [me]_2959-i like this . Something snaps deep inside [me]_2959-i . “ Who the hell do [you]_{126-ms. foster} think [you]_{126-ms. foster} are ? ”_[56-robbie] “ Here [we]_2669-we go , ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie mutters under [his]_56-robbie breath . “ What ? ”_[56-robbie] [I]_2959-i cry . “ Here [we]_2669-we go ? Are [you]_{126-ms. foster} fucking serious ? ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie rests [his]_56-robbie chin on [his]_56-robbie hand as [he]_56-robbie glares at [me]_2959-i . “ What was last night ? Huh ? ”_[56-robbie] [I]_2959-i cry . Alarm bells start screaming around [me]_2959-i . This is the worst thing [I]_2959-i could possibly do , but [I]_2959-i ’ve lost all control . “ [You]_{126-ms. foster} ’re seeing [someone else]_{433-someone else} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer . “ Who ’s [Chloe]_135-chloe , [Jameson]_186-jameson ? ”_[56-robbie] [His]_56-robbie eyebrow rises , and [he]_56-robbie stands and walks toward the door . “ Out . ”_[56-robbie] “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap in disbelief . “ [You]_{126-ms. foster} ’re kicking [me]_2959-i out ? ”_[2959-i] “ What [I]_56-robbie ’m doing is being professional . [I]_56-robbie suggest [you]_{126-ms. foster} do the same thing . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie stands over [me]_2959-i . “ [You]_{126-ms. foster} know what ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper up at [him]_56-robbie through tears of rage . “ [You]_{126-ms. foster} can go fuck [yourself]_{126-ms. foster} . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie glares at [me]_2959-i . “ Not that it ’s any of [your]_{126-ms. foster} business , but [Chloe]_135-chloe is [my]_56-robbie masseuse . [I]_56-robbie had an appointment with [her]_135-chloe last night that [I]_56-robbie was n’t [home]_2289-home for . Those text messages came through hours after [she]_135-chloe sent [them]_2672-them . ”_[56-robbie] [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_56-robbie as [my]_2959-i heart hammers in [my]_2959-i chest . “ Do not check [my]_56-robbie fucking phone ever again . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie sneers as [he]_56-robbie turns [his]_56-robbie back on [me]_2959-i and goes and sits back at [his]_56-robbie desk . [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_56-robbie through tears . [I]_2959-i feel . . . used . “ [I]_2959-i thought [we]_2673-we had something . ”_[2959-i] “ So did [I.]_2959-i ”_[56-robbie] [His]_56-robbie cold eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ But [you]_56-robbie fucked that up this morning when [you]_56-robbie left like a two - year - old . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie turns back to [his]_56-robbie computer . “ Do [you]_56-robbie sleep with [your]_56-robbie masseuse ? ”_[56-robbie] [His]_56-robbie eyes come to [mine]_2959-i . “ That is none of [your]_56-robbie business . Now get out . ”_[56-robbie] Chapter 9 [I]_2959-i storm out of [[his]_56-robbie office]_{426-his office} and down [the hall]_{611-the hall} , and [I]_2959-i fall into [the ladies ’ room]_{840-the ladies ’ room} . [I]_2959-i burst into [the stall]_{611-the hall} , sit down , and put [my]_2959-i head into [my]_2959-i hands . Embarrassment fills [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i just completely lost control and made [a fool of [myself]_2959-i]_{841-a fool of myself} . [[You]_842-you stupid fucking idiot]_{843-you stupid fucking idiot} . [My]_2959-i heartbeat sounds through [my]_2959-i body , and [I]_2959-i ’m so angry right now that [I]_2959-i ca n’t even see straight . [His]_56-robbie words come back to [me]_2959-i : But [you]_842-you fucked that up this morning when [you]_842-you left like a two - year - old . [God]_0-aaron . Angry tears stream down [my]_2959-i face , and [I]_2959-i wipe them away as quickly as [they]_844-they appear . Stop crying , [[you]_842-you baby]_{845-you baby} . [I]_2959-i ’m not even upset — [I’m]_2959-i angry . Now [I]_2959-i have to get off this floor without [anyone]_272-anyone seeing [me]_2959-i . Why am [I]_2959-i fucking crying ? [I]_2959-i know why . Because [I]_2959-i ’m sleep deprived , and [I]_2959-i deserve to be treated better , that ’s why . [The fucking asshole]_{847-the fucking asshole} . Who the hell does [he]_{847-the fucking asshole} think [he]_{847-the fucking asshole} is ? The longer [I]_2959-i ’m in here , the worse it is . [I]_2959-i wash [my]_2959-i face , dry [my]_2959-i eyes , and drop [my]_2959-i shoulders as [I]_2959-i steel [myself]_2959-i to walk past reception . [I]_2959-i ’m fine , fine . . . totally fine . [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson does not have the power to affect [me]_2959-i at all . [I]_2959-i open [the bathroom]_{300-the bathroom} door and walk out , and [Tristan]_2430-tristan comes around the corner . [His]_2430-tristan face falls when [he]_2430-tristan sees [me]_2959-i . “ [Emily]_186-jameson ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan frowns . “ Are [you]_186-jameson all right ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ Yes , of course . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i storm past [him]_2430-tristan . “ [He]_2430-tristan ’s had a bad day , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [he]_2430-tristan calls after [me]_2959-i , and [my]_2959-i eyes fill with tears anew . Yeah , well . . . so have [I.]_2959-i “ Where have [you]_186-jameson been ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly asks on [my]_2959-i arrival back to [my]_2959-i desk . “ [I]_2959-i went and saw [Ricardo]_246-alan , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i lie . “ So where do [you]_186-jameson want to go tonight ? ”_[2959-i] “ Oh . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i wince . [I]_2959-i ca n’t think of anything worse . “ [I]_2959-i ’m sorry , [guys]_681-guys . [I]_2959-i ’m going to bail . [I]_2959-i need to sleep . ”_[2959-i] “ But [we]_681-guys want to hear all the juicy details . ”_[2959-i] “ Oh . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i heart sinks . [I]_2959-i do n’t want [them]_849-them to know that [I]_2959-i ’m [the world]_{249-the world} ’s biggest loser . “ [We]_681-guys did n’t meet up last night . [He]_0-aaron pulled out . ”_[2959-i] “ What ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron frowns . “ Whatever . [I]_2959-i do n’t care . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug , acting casual . [I]_2959-i wish [I]_2959-i had n’t told [them]_849-them anything at all about [him]_0-aaron now . “ Yeah , that ’s okay . [I]_0-aaron need to save money anyway . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron sighs as [he]_0-aaron packs up [his]_0-aaron computer . “ [You]_0-aaron coming ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly asks . “ [I]_198-molly ’m just going to finish this up . ”_[198-molly] [I]_2959-i open [my]_2959-i computer back up . The last thing [I]_2959-i want to do is give [the bastard]_{75-the bastard} a reason to fire [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i finish [my]_2959-i task , and finally , an hour later , [I]_2959-i close [my]_2959-i computer and head [downstairs]_{2454-downstairs} . [I]_2959-i walk through the front doors and glance up to see the black limo parked at [the curb]_{549-the curb} . Shit . [I]_2959-i look around nervously . Is [he]_0-aaron in there ? Damn it , [I]_2959-i do n’t want to see [him]_0-aaron . [I]_2959-i power walk across [the street]_{550-the street} to [the safe haven of the café]_{855-the safe haven of the café} . [I]_2959-i order a drink and take a seat at the window . Great . [I]_2959-i drag [my]_2959-i hand down [my]_2959-i face . Seriously , what next ? This is the last thing [I]_2959-i need . “ Here [you]_{717-the waiter} go . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [The waiter]_{717-the waiter} smiles as [he]_{717-the waiter} puts [my]_2959-i iced tea down in front of [me]_2959-i . “ Thank [you]_{717-the waiter} . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [I]_2959-i watch [the driver]_{530-the driver} across [the road]_{533-the road} as [he]_{717-the waiter} leans on [the limo]_{678-the limo} , and [I]_2959-i think back to the other night when [I]_2959-i was on [my]_2959-i knees , and [he]_{717-the waiter} tried to open the door , and it was locked . [I]_2959-i wonder how long [he]_{717-the waiter} ’s worked for [him]_{717-the waiter} , how much [he]_{717-the waiter} ’s seen . [I]_2959-i watch as [he]_{717-the waiter} answers the phone and then gets in [the car]_{369-the car} and drives off . Huh ? Was [Jameson]_186-jameson already inside [the car]_{369-the car} ? Why did [he]_{717-the waiter} drive off ? That ’s weird . . . The front doors of [the building]_{361-the building} open , and [a group of [men]_330-men]_{862-a group of men} walk out . Shit , it ’s [them]_{862-a group of men} . [I]_2959-i pick up the menu and cover [my]_2959-i face as [I]_2959-i peer through the window and across [the street]_{550-the street} . [Tristan]_2430-tristan , [Elliot]_140-elliot , [Christopher]_{141-christopher} , and [Jameson]_186-jameson . . . and [the blonde girl who was with [Tristan]_2430-tristan the other night]_{865-the blonde girl who was with tristan the other night} . [She]_{865-the blonde girl who was with tristan the other night} ’s super trendy , and [her]_{865-the blonde girl who was with tristan the other night} work clothes look like [they]_{862-a group of men} belong in a modeling shoot . [The boys]_{801-the boys} look so similar . [Elliot]_140-elliot is the most like [Jameson]_186-jameson , with dark hair and piercing blue eyes . Then [Tristan]_2430-tristan and [Christopher]_{141-christopher} look alike , lighter hair with a curl . [They]_{801-the boys} ’re talking as [they]_{801-the boys} walk , and [Jameson]_186-jameson says something with a straight face , and [they]_{801-the boys} all laugh out loud . What did [he]_140-elliot say ? [They]_{801-the boys} walk around the corner . [Elliot]_140-elliot puts [his]_140-elliot hand affectionately on [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s back as [they]_{801-the boys} cross [the road]_{533-the road} while deep in conversation . [I]_2959-i watch [them]_{801-the boys} walk up [the street]_{550-the street} and then into a cocktail bar . [I]_2959-i pinch the bridge of [my]_2959-i nose and close [my]_2959-i eyes with a huge sad sigh . [Ugh]_61-ugh , [I]_2959-i just want this day to be over . It ’s amazing what a weekend and some sleep can do for [a girl]_{387-a girl} . [I]_2959-i march into [the building on Monday]_{870-the building on monday} like [the most powerful woman on [earth]_872-earth]_{871-the most powerful woman on earth} . “ Good morning . ”_[2959-i] [The security guard]_{263-the security guard} smiles as [I]_2959-i walk through the security screen . “ Morning . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . “ Lovely day , is n’t it ? ”_[2959-i] “ Sure is . ”_{[263-the security guard]} [He]_{263-the security guard} winks as [I]_2959-i walk past [him]_{263-the security guard} . To hell with [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson . So what ? [We]_874-we had sex . So what ? It was great . But guess what ? [I]_2959-i do n’t care . [I]_2959-i ’m not letting [him]_{263-the security guard} dull [my]_2959-i [New York]_{385-new york} shine . [I]_2959-i moved here to start a new and exciting life , and to be honest , the first three weeks have been pretty amazing . . . well , except last week . But [I]_2959-i ’m scratching that from the record , so it does n’t actually count . [I]_2959-i ’m moving onward and upward , and twelve months from now [I]_2959-i ’ll probably look back at this and laugh . [I]_2959-i make it to [my]_2959-i floor to find [Ava]_77-ava and [[her]_77-ava friend]_{875-her friend} [Renee]_146-renee talking by [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} . “ Hi , [girls]_2675-girls . ”_[146-renee] “ Hi . ”_[77-ava] [Ava]_77-ava smiles . “ How are [you]_2675-girls ? ”_[77-ava] “ Good . Great , actually . What are [you]_2675-girls guys up to ? ”_[146-renee] “ [We]_2675-girls ’re discussing where [we]_2675-girls want to go this weekend . ”_[77-ava] “ Oh . ”_[77-ava] “ Hey , [you]_2675-girls should come clubbing with [us]_2675-girls , ”_[77-ava] [she]_77-ava offers . “ Really ? ”_[77-ava] “ Yeah , for sure . [We]_2675-girls have a blast . ”_[77-ava] “ [You]_2675-girls know what ? [I]_2959-i ’d love to . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . “ Awesome . ”_[77-ava] [She]_77-ava takes [her]_77-ava phone out of [her]_77-ava pocket and puts [my]_2959-i number in . “ [We]_2675-girls usually meet up about eight or nine on Saturday night . ”_[77-ava] “ For dinner first ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ No . ”_[77-ava] [She]_77-ava smirks . “ [We]_2675-girls eat mac and cheese before [we]_2675-girls go out and then buy hella expensive drinks . [Priorities]_{147-priorities} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i laugh . “ Okay , sounds good . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i make [my]_2959-i way to [my]_2959-i desk and find [Aaron]_0-aaron already working . “ Hi . ”_[2959-i] “ Hi . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron says sadly . “ What ’s wrong ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown as [I]_2959-i take [my]_2959-i seat . “ [I]_0-aaron got stood up again last night . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron sighs . “ [I]_0-aaron ’m just getting sick of this , [you]_0-aaron know ? ”_[0-aaron] “ Have [you]_0-aaron talked to [him]_0-aaron ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ No , [he]_0-aaron ’s always working or got things going on or a legitimate excuse . Maybe [I]_0-aaron ’m looking for problems that are n’t there . ”_[0-aaron] “ Maybe , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reply . “ Anyway , [you]_0-aaron ’ll be glad to know that [I]_2959-i ’m in a much better mood today . ”_[2959-i] “ Really ? ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron smirks . “ What ’s [your]_0-aaron secret ? ”_[0-aaron] “ Sleep , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reply . “ And [I]_2959-i ’m even going to start going to [the gym]_{2412-the gym} on level three next week . Want to come with [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] “ Maybe . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron thinks about it . “ [We]_2677-we could become [superhot fitness freaks]_{2678-superhot fitness freaks} . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron chuckles . “ Yeah , okay . Are [you]_0-aaron high ? ”_[0-aaron] “ [I]_2959-i had such a shitty day on Friday , and [I]_2959-i ’m determined to change [my]_2959-i mind - set . ”_[2959-i] “ Good for [you]_0-aaron . ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly arrives and puts [her]_198-molly bag onto the desk with a bang . “ [Anybody]_457-anybody want [a kid]_{2680-a kid} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i giggle . “ What now ? ”_[2959-i] “ [Ugh]_61-ugh . ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly flops into [her]_198-molly chair . “ So [you]_0-aaron know how [Brad]_95-brad got caught messaging [that girl]_198-molly . [I]_198-molly took [his]_95-brad phone from [him]_95-brad because [[his]_95-brad father]_{2681-his father} would n’t do it , ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly snaps . “ Yeah . ”_[198-molly] “ Well , [he]_95-brad was angry , but [he]_95-brad was n’t that pissed off , [you]_0-aaron know ? ”_[198-molly] “ What do [you]_0-aaron mean ? ”_[198-molly] “ Well , [he]_95-brad was n’t hassling [me]_2959-i for [his]_95-brad phone back all the time like normal , and [he]_95-brad wanted to go to bed really early last night . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown as [I]_2959-i listen . “ [I]_0-aaron felt like something was off , so [I]_0-aaron checked the hiding spot to see if [his]_95-brad phone was still there , and it was . Then [I]_0-aaron had this strange thought to check the SIM . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron chuckles , already knowing where this story is going . “ [The little shit]_{2682-the little shit} had taken the SIM out and put it into an old phone . ”_[0-aaron] “ Oh , crap . ”_[0-aaron] “ [I]_2959-i barge into [[his]_95-brad bedroom]_{758-the bedroom} , and sure enough , [he]_95-brad is on [his]_95-brad phone , and it is hidden under the covers . [I]_2959-i snatch it off [him]_95-brad and lock [myself]_2959-i in [the bathroom]_{300-the bathroom} while [I]_2959-i go through it . [He]_95-brad ’s banging the door down , so [I]_2959-i know there is something on there that [he]_95-brad does n’t want [me]_2959-i to see . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes widen as [I]_2959-i listen . “ Get this , ”_{[877-this fifteen - year - old little girl]} [she]_{877-this fifteen - year - old little girl} sneers . “ [Pure little Chanel]_112-chanel has been sending [him]_95-brad nudes too . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ [This fifteen - year - old little girl]_{877-this fifteen - year - old little girl} is built like [a fucking Penthouse Pet]_{2685-a fucking penthouse pet} . ”_[878-we] [We]_878-we chuckle . “ Oh , it gets worse , ”_{[877-this fifteen - year - old little girl]} [she]_{877-this fifteen - year - old little girl} continues . “ While [I]_{877-this fifteen - year - old little girl} ’m looking through [his]_95-brad phone , a new message comes through from [her]_{877-this fifteen - year - old little girl} . ”_{[877-this fifteen - year - old little girl]} “ What was it ? ”_{[877-this fifteen - year - old little girl]} “ [I]_2959-i got a Brazilian like [you]_2959-i wanted . [You]_2959-i like ? ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i mouth falls open . “ Can [you]_2959-i believe that message ? ”_[2959-i] Unable to help it , [I]_2959-i burst out laughing . “ [I]_{877-this fifteen - year - old little girl} would find this funny , too , if it were n’t [[my]_{877-this fifteen - year - old little girl} child]_{2686-my child} , ”_{[877-this fifteen - year - old little girl]} [she]_{877-this fifteen - year - old little girl} whispers as [she]_{877-this fifteen - year - old little girl} sits down at [her]_{877-this fifteen - year - old little girl} desk . “ Then [Brad]_95-brad had a complete meltdown and told [me]_{877-this fifteen - year - old little girl} that if [I]_{877-this fifteen - year - old little girl} call [[Chanel]_112-chanel ’s parents]_{2687-chanel ’s parents} , [I]_{877-this fifteen - year - old little girl} ’m effectively committing social suicide for [him]_95-brad as [his]_95-brad whole reputation will be ruined and that [he]_95-brad ’s never going to [school]_366-school again . ”_{[877-this fifteen - year - old little girl]} [She]_{877-this fifteen - year - old little girl} hits [her]_{877-this fifteen - year - old little girl} computer keyboard with a hard bang . “ That ’s true , ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron replies . “ [You]_0-aaron ca n’t call [[her]_{877-this fifteen - year - old little girl} mother]_{2689-her mother} . ”_[0-aaron] “ So it ’s all right for [her]_{2689-her mother} to call [me]_{877-this fifteen - year - old little girl} , but [I]_{877-this fifteen - year - old little girl} ca n’t call [her]_{2689-her mother} ? ”_{[877-this fifteen - year - old little girl]} [she]_{877-this fifteen - year - old little girl} stammers . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t know , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ [I]_2959-i probably would n’t call [[her]_{2689-her mother} mother]_{2689-her mother} either . ”_[2959-i] “ Well , what would [you]_0-aaron do ? ”_{[877-this fifteen - year - old little girl]} [she]_{877-this fifteen - year - old little girl} asks . “ [I]_{877-this fifteen - year - old little girl} ’d buy [him]_{877-this fifteen - year - old little girl} a box of condoms , that ’s what [I]_{877-this fifteen - year - old little girl} ’d do . ”_{[877-this fifteen - year - old little girl]} [She]_{877-this fifteen - year - old little girl} stares at [me]_2959-i , wide eyed . “ Because imagine if [he]_{877-this fifteen - year - old little girl} got [her]_{877-this fifteen - year - old little girl} pregnant , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i add . “ Oh [my]_{877-this fifteen - year - old little girl} God . ”_{[877-this fifteen - year - old little girl]} [She]_{877-this fifteen - year - old little girl} drags [her]_{877-this fifteen - year - old little girl} hand down [her]_{877-this fifteen - year - old little girl} face . “ [I]_{877-this fifteen - year - old little girl} ca n’t deal with [boys]_2690-boys . [They]_2690-boys are so stupid . ”_{[877-this fifteen - year - old little girl]} “ The amount of testosterone in [a male teenager]_{2691-a male teenager} is ridiculous , ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron replies casually . “ [I]_198-molly was jerking off four times a day when [I]_198-molly was fifteen . ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly and [I]_2959-i wince . “ Four times a day ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer . “ Do n’t [girls]_2675-girls do that ? ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i frowns in surprise . “ No , ”_[330-men] [we]_330-men both gasp . “ [Men]_330-men are gross . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i fake a shiver in disgust . The phone on [my]_2959-i desk rings . “ Hello , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i answer . “ Hello , [Emily]_186-jameson , this is [Sammia]_246-alan , [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} ’s PA . ”_[198-molly] What does [she]_198-molly want ? “ Hi . ”_[198-molly] “ [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} asked [me]_198-molly to let [you]_186-jameson know that [you]_186-jameson have a meeting in [[his]_2959-i office]_{426-his office} in an hour . ”_[198-molly] “ [I]_198-molly ’m very busy today . Can [you]_186-jameson tell [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} that , unfortunately , [I]_198-molly wo n’t be able to make it ? ”_[198-molly] “ [He]_2959-i told [me]_2959-i that [your]_186-jameson attendance is mandatory , and [he]_2959-i ’s already spoken to [[your]_186-jameson manager]_{2694-your manager} to get clearance . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes . Stupid twat . “ Fine . [I]_2959-i ’ll be there . Thank [you]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] Knock , knock . [I]_2959-i tentatively knock on [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s door . “ Come in , ”_{[186-jameson]} [his]_186-jameson strong voice calls . [My]_2959-i stomach flips with nerves , and [I]_2959-i open the door . [Jameson]_186-jameson sits alone at [his]_186-jameson desk . [His]_186-jameson eyes rise to meet [mine]_2959-i . “ [You]_2959-i wanted to see [me]_186-jameson ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Yes , please take a seat . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i drop to the chair as [I]_2959-i clasp [my]_2959-i hands together with white - knuckle force . [His]_186-jameson eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ How are [you]_2959-i ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Good , thanks . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i drop [my]_2959-i eyes to the desk . [I]_2959-i ’m not looking at those beautiful blue eyes . [He]_186-jameson ’s like the snake from [The Jungle Book]_{880-the jungle book} — one look in those hypnotic suckers , and [your]_881-your panties drop to the floor . “ Look at [me]_186-jameson , please , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson commands . “ What do [you]_2959-i want , [Jameson]_186-jameson ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t have time for [your]_2959-i games . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i want [you]_2959-i to look at [me]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i drag [my]_2959-i eyes to [his]_186-jameson . “ Why do n’t [you]_2959-i want to look at [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_186-jameson for a moment . “ Because [I]_186-jameson just find [your]_2959-i face really . . . punchable . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson smirks and leans back in [his]_186-jameson chair , clearly amused . “ Is that so ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Yeah , it is . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i look around [[his]_186-jameson office]_{426-his office} . “ Can [we]_2695-we talk about work ? ”_[2959-i] “ Later . Right now [I]_186-jameson would like to talk about [your]_2959-i tantrum on Friday . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [I]_186-jameson would n’t . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [She]_2696-she ’s [my]_2959-i masseuse . ”_[2959-i] “ Like [you]_2959-i said , it ’s none of [my]_2959-i business . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i glare at [him]_186-jameson , [my]_2959-i resting bitch face in full swing . “ [I]_2959-i was going to call [you]_2959-i last night . ”_[2959-i] Now it ’s [my]_2959-i turn to be amused . “ Do n’t waste [your]_2959-i time . [I]_186-jameson would n’t have answered . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson runs [his]_186-jameson thumbnail back and forth over [his]_186-jameson bottom lip as [he]_186-jameson watches [me]_2959-i , as if fascinated . “ Why are [you]_2959-i so snarky ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [I]_186-jameson ’m not snarky . [I]_186-jameson ’m just not about to put up with shit from [an entitled asshole]_{2697-an entitled asshole} . [You]_2959-i may be [a CEO here]_{2698-a ceo here} , but . . . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson sits back and raises [his]_186-jameson chin as if angered . “ Finish what [you]_2959-i wanted to say . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ No . [I]_2959-i ’m good . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i clench [my]_2959-i teeth together to stop [myself]_2959-i from elaborating . “ [I]_186-jameson may be [the CEO]_{2388-the ceo} here . . . but what ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson demands as [he]_186-jameson swivels on [his]_186-jameson chair . “ [I]_186-jameson was n’t angry with [you]_2959-i on Friday . [I]_186-jameson left in the middle of the night because [I]_186-jameson was confused . . . about a lot of things . [I]_186-jameson was going to talk to [you]_2959-i when [I]_186-jameson was thinking clearly because [I]_186-jameson did n’t want to be [a drama queen]_{2700-a drama queen} . ”_{[186-jameson]} [Our]_883-our eyes are locked . “ And then [I]_186-jameson came to [[your]_2959-i office]_{2452-your office} , and [you]_2959-i treated [me]_186-jameson like a two - bit whore that [you]_2959-i ejaculated in the night before . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson clenches [his]_186-jameson jaw . “ [I]_186-jameson ’m [[nobody]_2321-nobody ’s whore]_{2703-nobody ’s whore} , [Jameson]_186-jameson , least of all [yours]_2959-i . No job is worth [my]_186-jameson self - respect . ”_{[186-jameson]} The air crackles between [us]_883-our . “ So excuse [me]_186-jameson if the privilege of sucking [[your]_2959-i golden CEO]_{2704-your golden ceo} dick does n’t excite [me]_186-jameson any longer . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson rubs [his]_186-jameson thumbnail back and forth over [his]_186-jameson bottom lip as [his]_186-jameson eyes hold [mine]_884-mine . “ Were [you]_2959-i on [the debating team]_{2705-the debating team} , [Ms. Foster]_{126-ms. foster} ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ What does that have to do with anything ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap , annoyed . “ [You]_2959-i make a good argument . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson licks [his]_186-jameson bottom lip as [he]_186-jameson tries to hide [his]_186-jameson amusement . “ Impressive . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes . [Sarcastic asshole]_{885-sarcastic asshole} . [God]_0-aaron , [he]_{885-sarcastic asshole} infuriates [me]_2959-i so bad . [I]_2959-i get an image of [myself]_2959-i diving over the desk and punching [him]_{885-sarcastic asshole} in the nose as hard as [I]_2959-i can . It would wipe that smug smirk off [his]_{885-sarcastic asshole} stupid face . [I]_2959-i ’m not even joking ; [his]_{885-sarcastic asshole} face really is punchable . “ Please , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i mutter under [my]_2959-i breath . “ Please what ? ”_[2959-i] “ Please stop insulting [my]_2959-i intelligence . Run [your]_2430-tristan meeting so [I]_2959-i can get back to work . [You]_2430-tristan ’re wasting [my]_2959-i time . ”_[2959-i] Knock , knock . “ Come in , ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson calls . [Tristan]_2430-tristan puts [his]_2430-tristan head around the door and looks between [us]_886-us . “ Are [we]_886-us on ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} [I]_2959-i get the feeling that [Jameson]_186-jameson told [them]_886-us to give [us]_886-us ten minutes alone before [they]_886-us joined [us]_886-us . “ Yes , come in , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [he]_2430-tristan replies coolly as [he]_2430-tristan rearranges some papers on [his]_2430-tristan desk . [They]_886-us all pile into [the office]_{385-new york} , and [I]_2959-i straighten in [my]_2959-i chair . [These four men]_{888-these four men} together are an extreme sucker punch . [Gorgeous]_148-gorgeous overload . “ Hello . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan smiles . “ [Emily]_186-jameson , this is [Elliot]_140-elliot and [Christopher]_{141-christopher} , [[our]_886-us brothers]_{888-these four men} . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [I]_2959-i stand and shake both of [their]_{888-these four men} hands . “ Hello . ”_[140-elliot] [Elliot]_140-elliot and [Christopher]_{141-christopher} smile . “ Hi . ”_[140-elliot] “ Please be seated , ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson commands . “ [Tristan]_2430-tristan , [you]_2430-tristan can do the honors , please . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Okay . So as per [our]_886-us meeting on Friday , [we]_886-us have recruited [a private corporate investigator]_{2706-a private corporate investigator} to work on [your]_2430-tristan floor and get to the bottom of [this mess]_{2707-this mess} . ”_[140-elliot] “ Okay . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i look between [them]_{888-these four men} . “ What [we]_886-us want [you]_2430-tristan to do is keep sending in bogus stories . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ Why ? ”_[2959-i] “ Because if there are a lot of stories going through that are bogus , it will be easier for [us]_886-us to trace . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sit back in [my]_2959-i seat , annoyed . “ And as [you]_2430-tristan can see — ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan continues . [Jameson]_186-jameson holds [his]_186-jameson hand up . “ Stop there . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson turns [his]_186-jameson attention to [me]_2959-i . “ What is it , [Emily]_186-jameson ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_186-jameson . “ What did [you]_2430-tristan want to say , then ? ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes flick between [the four men]_{889-the four men} . “ With all due respect , [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} , [I]_2959-i did n’t apply for [my]_2959-i dream job to do bogus stories . ”_[2959-i] “ Fair point , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson snaps as [he]_186-jameson rubs [his]_186-jameson thumb over [his]_186-jameson fingertips . “ What ’s going to happen when this is all over ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ [You]_2430-tristan will return to [your]_2430-tristan normal duties . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i would like that in writing , please , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . [Elliot]_140-elliot smirks and drops [his]_140-elliot head . [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s eyes hold [mine]_140-elliot . “ Very well . ”_[140-elliot] [He]_140-elliot turns [his]_140-elliot attention back to [Tristan]_2430-tristan . “ Please continue . ”_[140-elliot] “ [The investigator]_{2708-the investigator} will be starting next week on Monday , and [Emily]_186-jameson , [we]_2709-we would like [you]_186-jameson to be [his]_140-elliot eyes on the floor . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t really want to get involved in all this . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_186-jameson involved [yourself]_186-jameson the moment [you]_186-jameson stepped through [my]_186-jameson office door , ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson replies . [I]_2959-i drop [my]_2959-i head . [God]_0-aaron . “ [Emily]_186-jameson , if [you]_186-jameson could give [us]_2709-we a few bogus stories to start with next Monday , that would be great . ”_[2959-i] “ Okay , what would [you]_186-jameson like [me]_186-jameson to write about ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s eyes meet [mine]_2959-i . “ The first story [I]_2959-i would like to be about a fake prostitution racket . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown in question . “ Call [the ringleader a two - bit whore]_{2710-the ringleader a two - bit whore} . ”_[56-robbie] The fucking nerve of [this man]_56-robbie . “ Okay . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile sweetly . “ [I]_2959-i have enough material to work with on that one . ”_[2959-i] “ Good . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan smiles . “ Work on those stories , and [we]_2709-we will touch base next Monday afternoon . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ Yes , okay , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reply as [I]_2959-i stand and walk toward the door . “ Sounds good . ”_[2959-i] “ [Emily]_186-jameson , [I]_186-jameson ’d like to see [you]_186-jameson for a moment , please , ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson replies calmly . [I]_2959-i stop on the spot . Seriously ? [The boys]_{801-the boys} file out of [the office]_{385-new york} . “ Bye , [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_{[801-the boys]} [they]_{801-the boys} call . “ Bye . ”_{[801-the boys]} The door closes behind [them]_{801-the boys} , and [Jameson]_186-jameson stands and walks up behind [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i can feel the heat from [his]_186-jameson body . The power [he]_186-jameson emanates is like nothing [I]_2959-i ’ve ever felt . [He]_186-jameson takes [my]_2959-i ponytail in [his]_186-jameson hand and wraps it around [his]_186-jameson knuckles three times and pulls [my]_2959-i head to the side to give [him]_186-jameson access to [my]_2959-i neck . In slow motion , [he]_186-jameson licks from [my]_2959-i collarbone to [my]_2959-i jaw with [his]_186-jameson thick , strong tongue . [His]_186-jameson lips go to [my]_2959-i ear . “ [I]_186-jameson did n’t get to taste [you]_186-jameson yet . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i close [my]_2959-i eyes as arousal runs through [my]_2959-i blood like a river rapid . Goose bumps scatter up [my]_2959-i spine . [I]_2959-i turn to [him]_186-jameson , and [he]_186-jameson takes [my]_2959-i hand and puts it over [his]_186-jameson large erection in [his]_186-jameson pants . Electricity zaps between [us]_893-us , and [our]_893-us eyes are locked . [My]_2959-i breathing becomes ragged . “ Can [I]_186-jameson see [you]_186-jameson tonight ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson breathes . [I]_2959-i squeeze [his]_186-jameson dick as [my]_2959-i sex clenches in appreciation . “ No , [Jameson]_186-jameson , [you]_186-jameson ca n’t . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i turn and walk out of [[his]_186-jameson office]_{426-his office} with [my]_2959-i heart hammering in [my]_2959-i chest . [I]_2959-i get into [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} as [my]_2959-i body screams for [me]_2959-i to go back . Every molecule in [my]_2959-i body wants [that man]_{262-oh man} . But [he]_{262-oh man} ’s just [an asshole]_{662-an asshole} . . . and [I]_2959-i ’m just [another groupie]_{898-another groupie} . It ’s not going to happen . It ’s Saturday night , and [we]_899-we are lined up to get into [Sky Bar]_{399-sky bar} . [I]_2959-i ’m with [Ava]_77-ava and [Renee]_146-renee , and this is [[our]_899-we third club]_{900-our third club} . It ’s nearly midnight . [I]_2959-i ’m having the best time ever . [We]_899-we have laughed and danced and prick teased [every stupid man in [New York]_{385-new york}]_{901-every stupid man in new york} . “ Why are [we]_899-we waiting here in line again ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ What was wrong with the last place ? ”_[2959-i] “ Nothing . [This place]_{399-sky bar} is better , but it does n’t heat up until eleven . ”_[2959-i] “ Oh . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug . [Gosh]_149-gosh , [I]_2959-i know nothing about [New York]_{385-new york} nightlife . [The doorman]_{902-the doorman} removes the red rope blocking the door and ushers [us]_899-we in , and [my]_2959-i breath catches . Wow , [this bar]_{399-sky bar} is way up on the fiftieth floor and has [a huge balcony overlooking [the city lights]_{904-the city lights}]_{903-a huge balcony overlooking the city lights} . There ’s a dance floor and numerous cocktail bars , and [the girls]_{378-the men} are right — [the men]_{378-the men} here are another caliber . [I]_2959-i glance down at [myself]_2959-i nervously ; [I]_2959-i hope [I]_2959-i look all right . [My]_2959-i long dark hair is down , and [I]_2959-i ’m wearing a cream - colored fitted dress . It has long sleeves and a plunging neckline . [I]_2959-i splurged and bought [myself]_2959-i a new dress for tonight ; [I]_2959-i wanted to look nice . It ’s paying off ; [I]_2959-i ’ve never gotten so much male attention in [my]_2959-i life . Amazing what a tight dress and a little cleavage can do for [a girl]_{387-a girl} . [We]_899-we order drinks and go and find a space to stand as [I]_2959-i look around in awe . [I]_2959-i ’ve never been in [such a cool nightclub]_{399-sky bar} before . “ [This place]_{399-sky bar} is insane . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile at [the girls]_{378-the men} . “ Right ? ”_[77-ava] [Ava]_77-ava smiles . “ [The men]_{378-the men} here are off the hook . ”_[77-ava] “ And filthy rich , ”_[146-renee] [Renee]_146-renee adds . “ Who cares about rich ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smirk as [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i drink . “ [Me]_{378-the men} , ”_{[378-the men]} [they]_{378-the men} both reply in unison . “ If [you]_{378-the men} ’re going to be with [a guy]_{294-a guy} , [he]_{294-a guy} may as well be wealthy , if [you]_{378-the men} ask [me]_77-ava . Fuck being with [a poor bastard]_{294-a guy} . [I]_77-ava ’m poor , and opposites most definitely attract , ”_[77-ava] says [Ava]_77-ava . [I]_2959-i laugh as [I]_2959-i listen to [them]_{378-the men} . “ So who do [we]_2712-we have [here]_{385-new york} tonight ? ”_[77-ava] [Ava]_77-ava says as [she]_77-ava looks around [the club]_{909-the club} . “ What do [you]_{378-the men} mean ? ”_[77-ava] [I]_2959-i ask as [I]_2959-i watch [her]_77-ava eyes scan [the room]_{399-sky bar} . “ [This place]_{399-sky bar} is a huge celebrity hangout . ”_[2959-i] “ Really ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown as [I]_2959-i look around . “ [I]_2959-i would n’t even know [any celebrities]_{2714-any celebrities} . ”_[2959-i] Over the next hour , [we]_911-we dance and laugh , and [Ava]_77-ava explains to [me]_2959-i in great detail about who is who . Apparently , [the men]_{378-the men} are all very impressive . [None]_913-none take [my]_2959-i fancy , though . [A gorgeous man]_{729-a gorgeous man} comes up through [the crowd]_{265-the crowd} and puts [his]_{729-a gorgeous man} hands on [my]_2959-i thighs . “ Do [you]_{729-a gorgeous man} want to dance ? ”_{[729-a gorgeous man]} [he]_{729-a gorgeous man} asks . [He]_{729-a gorgeous man} ’s blond and big and totally in [my]_2959-i space , but the way [he]_{729-a gorgeous man} looks , [I]_2959-i think [I]_2959-i can deal with it . “ Yes , [she]_77-ava does , ”_[77-ava] [Ava]_77-ava stammers as [she]_77-ava stares at [the god in front of [us]_917-us]_{916-the god in front of us} . [He]_{729-a gorgeous man} grabs [my]_2959-i hand and drags [me]_2959-i to the dance floor , and [I]_2959-i give [[my]_2959-i friends]_{546-my friends} a scared wave with [my]_2959-i fingertips as [my]_2959-i eyes widen . [Ava]_77-ava blows [me]_2959-i a kiss and jiggles on the spot in excitement . “ What ’s [your]_77-ava name ? ”_{[729-a gorgeous man]} [he]_{729-a gorgeous man} asks as [he]_{729-a gorgeous man} wraps [his]_{729-a gorgeous man} arms around [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i put [my]_2959-i hands on [his]_{729-a gorgeous man} shoulders as [I]_2959-i stare up at [him]_{729-a gorgeous man} . “ [Emily]_186-jameson . What ’s [yours]_186-jameson ? ”_[2959-i] “ [Rocco]_150-rocco . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile up at [him]_{729-a gorgeous man} . What a weird name . [Gosh]_149-gosh , [I]_2959-i feel tipsy . [I]_2959-i need to stop drinking . “ This is [your]_149-gosh first time here ? ”_{[729-a gorgeous man]} [he]_{729-a gorgeous man} says , as if [he]_{729-a gorgeous man} already knows the answer . “ How do [you]_149-gosh know that ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smirk . “ [I]_2959-i would have noticed [you]_149-gosh if [you]_149-gosh were here before . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile bashfully . [His]_{729-a gorgeous man} hands roam down to [my]_2959-i behind , and [I]_2959-i lift them back to [my]_2959-i waist . “ [You]_149-gosh ’re very forward , [Rocco]_150-rocco . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i know what [I]_2959-i want when [I]_2959-i see it . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile as [he]_{729-a gorgeous man} leans in and puts [his]_{729-a gorgeous man} lips to [my]_2959-i ear . “ [I]_{729-a gorgeous man} want [you]_149-gosh , ”_{[729-a gorgeous man]} [he]_{729-a gorgeous man} breathes . Chapter 10 [Jameson]_186-jameson “ Hmm , not bad , ”_{[141-christopher]} [Christopher]_{141-christopher} murmurs as [an attractive redhead]_{919-an attractive redhead} walks past [us]_920-us . [We]_920-us both watch [her]_{919-an attractive redhead} as [she]_{919-an attractive redhead} saunters over to [the bar]_{459-the bar} . [She]_{919-an attractive redhead} ’s wearing a tight black dress , and [she]_{919-an attractive redhead} has a perfectly rounded ass . [I]_2959-i scrunch [my]_2959-i nose up in distaste . “ Average . ”_[2959-i] “ [She]_{919-an attractive redhead} is not average . ”_{[729-a gorgeous man]} [His]_{729-a gorgeous man} eyes drop to [her]_{919-an attractive redhead} behind and stay firmly fixed . “ Far from it , actually . ”_{[729-a gorgeous man]} “ Not doing it for [me]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sigh against [my]_2959-i glass as [I]_2959-i look around [the crowded club]_{922-the crowded club} . It ’s a rarity that [a woman]_{339-a woman} catches [my]_2959-i attention these days , with the exception of [Little Miss Snarky]_{151-little miss snarky} . [I]_2959-i ca n’t get enough of [her]_{151-little miss snarky} . . . even if [she]_{151-little miss snarky} is completely unmanageable . [Our]_924-our exchange in [[my]_2959-i office]_{455-my office} on Monday runs through [my]_2959-i mind , and [I]_2959-i exhale heavily . [She]_{151-little miss snarky} ’s so fucking difficult . It would help if [I]_2959-i could keep [my]_2959-i mouth shut when [I]_2959-i see [her]_{151-little miss snarky} . For some reason , [she]_{151-little miss snarky} has [me]_2959-i blurting out demands and grabbing [her]_{151-little miss snarky} by the hair ; it ’s as if [my]_2959-i body takes on a need of its own and completely leaves [my]_2959-i brain out of the equation . Every time [Emily]_186-jameson leaves [[my]_2959-i office]_{455-my office} in a huff , [I]_2959-i kick [myself]_2959-i for handling [her]_{151-little miss snarky} the wrong way . [I]_2959-i know [women]_276-women ; [I]_2959-i know how [they]_276-women think , and [I]_2959-i can usually get [them]_276-women to do whatever [I]_2959-i want . [Her]_{151-little miss snarky} . . . not so much . [Christopher]_{141-christopher} licks [his]_{141-christopher} lips as [he]_{141-christopher} watches [the redhead]_{927-the redhead} . “ [I]_{141-christopher} ’m going in . ”_{[141-christopher]} [He]_{141-christopher} strides across [the club]_{459-the bar} and says something to [her]_{151-little miss snarky} as [she]_{151-little miss snarky} stands at [the bar]_{459-the bar} , and in slow motion , [she]_{151-little miss snarky} smiles up at [him]_{141-christopher} . [I]_2959-i smirk and sip [my]_2959-i drink as [I]_2959-i watch [him]_{141-christopher} in action . [He]_{141-christopher} loves [women]_{379-the women} — [all women]_{930-all women} . It seems to be a family trait ; [we]_931-we ’re all wired the same way . Something ’s changed for [me]_2959-i lately , though . [My]_2959-i appetite for variety has waned . Something ’s off , and [I]_2959-i ca n’t quite put [my]_2959-i finger on it . [I]_2959-i glance over to [Tristan]_2430-tristan and [Elliot]_140-elliot as [they]_932-they talk to [two girls in [the lounge]_{514-the room}]_{933-two girls in the lounge} . [The women]_{379-the women} are being all animated and laughing on cue at everything that comes out of [the boys]_{801-the boys} ’ mouths . [Bimbos]_152-bimbos . [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i drink as [I]_2959-i look around [the room]_{514-the room} . “ Hey , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan says as [he]_2430-tristan comes to stand beside [me]_2959-i . “ Look who ’s here . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ Who ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i mutter , uninterested . “ Cream - colored dress , hair down , and looking absolutely fucking sensational . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown as [I]_2959-i look over to where [he]_2430-tristan is gesturing . It ’s [her]_936-her . [Emily]_186-jameson is [here]_{385-new york} . A broad smile crosses [my]_2959-i face . “ Well , well . The night just got interesting . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan chuckles . “ That ’s if [you]_2715-you do n’t kill each other first . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan slaps [me]_2959-i on the back . “ [I]_2430-tristan ’m going to [the bar]_{459-the bar} . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ Yeah , okay . ”_[936-her] [She]_936-her ’s with [two women [I]_2959-i ’ve never seen before , although [they]_{938-two women i ’ve never seen before , although they do look vaguely familiar} do look vaguely familiar]_{938-two women i ’ve never seen before , although they do look vaguely familiar} ; [they]_{938-two women i ’ve never seen before , although they do look vaguely familiar} might be from work . [They]_{938-two women i ’ve never seen before , although they do look vaguely familiar} ’re talking and laughing . [Emily]_186-jameson is wearing a tight cream - colored dress with long sleeves and a plunging neckline . [I]_2959-i can see every curve on [her]_186-jameson delicious body , and [my]_2959-i cock swells in appreciation . [Her]_186-jameson hair is down , and [she]_186-jameson pulls it over to one side as [she]_186-jameson talks , and [I]_2959-i see the curve of [her]_186-jameson bare neck ; [my]_2959-i stomach clenches in excitement . Fuck . . . [she]_186-jameson ’s hot . [I]_2959-i ’ve never had such an intense physical reaction to [a woman]_{339-a woman} like this before . [I]_2959-i just ca n’t get enough of [her]_{339-a woman} body . The more [I]_2959-i have [her]_{339-a woman} , the more [I]_2959-i want [her]_{339-a woman} . If only [she]_{339-a woman} did n’t have the snarkiest damn attitude [I]_2959-i ’ve ever seen . Maybe that ’s the appeal ? [Most women]_{940-most women} fall at [my]_2959-i feet ; [she]_{339-a woman} seems determined to push [me]_2959-i away . Hmm . That ’s something to think about . If the truth be known , [I]_2959-i should stay away from [her]_{339-a woman} . [She]_{339-a woman} works for [me]_2959-i , [she]_{339-a woman} ’s a firecracker , and who knows what [she]_{339-a woman} will do if [we]_941-we fight again . [I]_2959-i smirk . [I]_2959-i already know that [we]_941-we will fight again — the writing is on the wall . [She]_{339-a woman} has a way of pissing [me]_2959-i off like no other . A song comes on that [she]_{339-a woman} obviously likes , and [she]_{339-a woman} starts to dance on the spot . [Her]_{339-a woman} ass slowly moves to the tantric beat , and [I]_2959-i stand and stare , transfixed by [the goddess in front of [me]_2959-i]_{942-the goddess in front of me} . [She]_{339-a woman} has no idea how fucking sexy [she]_{339-a woman} is . “ [New York]_{385-new york} sour , ”_{[339-a woman]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan says as [he]_2430-tristan hands [me]_2959-i [my]_2959-i drink . “ Thanks . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [I]_2959-i take it from [him]_2430-tristan . “ [You]_2430-tristan know , the way [you]_2430-tristan ’re looking at [her]_{339-a woman} is illegal in [some countries]_{2717-some countries} , right ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i watch [her]_{339-a woman} hips roll , and [I]_2959-i imagine them over [me]_2959-i doing the same thing . [I]_2959-i inhale sharply as [my]_2959-i arousal starts to thump between [my]_2959-i legs . “ Have [you]_2430-tristan ever been so physically attracted to someone that [you]_2430-tristan lose the ability to think around [them]_{2717-some countries} ? ”_[2959-i] “ No . Thank fuck , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan replies as [he]_2430-tristan watches [her]_{339-a woman} dance . “ Although with that ass , [I]_2430-tristan can imagine — ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ Do n’t even fucking look at [her]_{339-a woman} ass , or [I]_2959-i will sit [you]_2430-tristan on [yours]_2430-tristan , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say , cutting [him]_2430-tristan off . [He]_2430-tristan chuckles . “ Look at [you]_2430-tristan getting all territorial . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan sips [his]_2430-tristan drink as mischief fills [his]_2430-tristan face . “ [She]_{339-a woman} did want to report to [me]_2430-tristan with that story , [you]_2430-tristan know . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [I]_2959-i look at [him]_2430-tristan flatly . “ And [you]_2430-tristan report to [me]_2430-tristan , [fucker]_2718-fucker . Go near [her]_{943-a blond man} , and [you]_2430-tristan will fucking die . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan throws [his]_2430-tristan head back and laughs out loud . [A blond man]_{943-a blond man} walks over to [her]_{943-a blond man} and says something , and [she]_{943-a blond man} smiles up at [him]_{943-a blond man} . “ Oh , look out , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan teases . “ Competition is on the horizon . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [I]_2959-i watch as uneasiness begins to swirl . [His]_{943-a blond man} hands go to [her]_{943-a blond man} thighs , and [I]_2959-i clench [my]_2959-i jaw . [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i drink as [I]_2959-i watch . [He]_{943-a blond man} says something , and [she]_{943-a blond man} laughs out loud before [he]_{943-a blond man} takes [her]_{943-a blond man} hand and leads [her]_{943-a blond man} to [the dance floor]_{944-the dance floor} . Are [you]_945-you fucking kidding [me]_2959-i ? [Tristan]_2430-tristan turns and laughs when [he]_{943-a blond man} sees [my]_2959-i face . “ Well , this is about to get interesting . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [The blond]_{946-the blond} slides [his]_{946-the blond} hands down to [her]_{943-a blond man} behind , and [she]_{943-a blond man} lifts [his]_{946-the blond} hands back to [her]_{943-a blond man} waist . [I]_2959-i watch as the sky turns red . Get [your]_947-your fucking hands off [her]_{943-a blond man} . [He]_{943-a blond man} says something , and [she]_{943-a blond man} laughs out loud . [I]_2959-i swallow the lump in [my]_2959-i throat . So this is what [she]_{943-a blond man} ’s [here]_{385-new york} for , is it ? To pick up [a man]_{2300-a man} . Fury begins to fill [me]_2959-i . “ Looks like [your]_947-your territory is about to be stolen . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan smirks . “ Shut the fuck up , [Tris]_2430-tristan , before [I]_2959-i knock [you]_2430-tristan out , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap as [my]_2959-i eyes stay glued to [them]_950-them . [The blond]_{2455-my boss} leans down and kisses [her]_{2455-my boss} neck . Something inside [me]_2959-i snaps , and before [I]_2959-i know what [I]_2959-i ’m doing , [I]_2959-i ’m on the dance floor beside [them]_950-them . “ Fuck off , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i growl . [Emily]_186-jameson turns to [me]_2959-i , and [her]_186-jameson face instantly drops . “ [Jameson]_186-jameson , ”_{[186-jameson]} [she]_186-jameson stammers . [My]_2959-i arm goes around [her]_186-jameson waist , and [I]_2959-i pull [her]_186-jameson from [his]_{2455-my boss} grip . “ [She]_186-jameson ’s here with [me]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [Emily]_186-jameson Oh [[my]_2959-i God]_{2363-my god} , what the hell is [Jameson]_186-jameson doing here ? [I]_2959-i step back from [the blond god]_{953-the blond god} , and [he]_{2455-my boss} grabs [me]_2959-i and pulls [me]_2959-i back toward [him]_{2455-my boss} . “ Do n’t , ”_{[2455-my boss]} [he]_{2455-my boss} snaps . “ Do n’t [you]_{2455-my boss} , ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson growls . [He]_{2455-my boss} pulls [me]_2959-i out of [the guy]_{2455-my boss} ’s arms and holds [me]_2959-i against [his]_{2455-my boss} chest . “ [I]_{2455-my boss} said [she]_{2455-my boss} ’s with [me]_{2455-my boss} , ”_{[2455-my boss]} [he]_{2455-my boss} repeats . [The guy]_{2455-my boss} stares at [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i nod softly . [I]_2959-i do n’t want any trouble , and [I]_2959-i just want [this guy]_{2455-my boss} to disappear . “ [I]_2959-i ’m with [him]_{2455-my boss} , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . With one last look between [Jameson]_186-jameson and [me]_2959-i , [he]_{2455-my boss} turns and storms off toward [the bar]_{459-the bar} . [I]_2959-i turn [my]_2959-i attention to [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson , [the infuriating prick]_{955-the infuriating prick} , and [I]_2959-i pull out of [his]_{2455-my boss} arms . “ What do [you]_2959-i think [you]_2959-i ’re doing ? ”_[2959-i] “ What do [you]_2959-i think [you]_2959-i ’re fucking doing ? ”_{[2455-my boss]} [he]_{2455-my boss} growls . “ Do n’t [you]_2959-i swear at [me]_{2455-my boss} . ”_{[2455-my boss]} “ [You]_2959-i came here to pick up [a man]_{2300-a man} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i put [my]_2959-i hands on [my]_2959-i hips in outrage . “ [I]_2959-i came here to dance . What are [you]_2959-i doing here ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_{2455-my boss} ’m here with [[my]_{2455-my boss} brothers]_{2616-my brothers} . ”_{[2455-my boss]} “ So go back to [[your]_2959-i brothers]_{2616-my brothers} and ruin [their]_{2616-my brothers} fun , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i huff . [I]_2959-i go to turn , and [he]_{2455-my boss} grabs [my]_2959-i arms and pulls [me]_2959-i to the side of the dance floor and pushes [me]_2959-i up against the wall . [His]_{2455-my boss} body covers [mine]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i can feel [his]_{2455-my boss} hard erection up against [my]_2959-i stomach . [We]_956-we stare at each other , and instantly the air between [us]_956-we changes . “ Do n’t , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper up at [him]_{2455-my boss} . “ Do n’t what ? ”_[2959-i] “ Hypnotize [me]_{2455-my boss} with that magical dick . ”_{[2455-my boss]} [He]_{2455-my boss} gives [me]_2959-i a cheeky wink . “ [You]_{2455-my boss} ’ve got that the wrong way around , [baby]_{2455-my boss} . [I]_{2455-my boss} ’m [the only one who ’s hypnotized around here]_{2721-the only one who ’s hypnotized around here} , ”_{[2455-my boss]} [he]_{2455-my boss} whispers as [he]_{2455-my boss} leans down toward [me]_2959-i . [His]_{2455-my boss} tongue slowly slides through [my]_2959-i lips . [He]_{2455-my boss} kisses [me]_2959-i again , with just the right amount of suction , and [my]_2959-i knees begin to buckle beneath [me]_2959-i . [Dear God]_0-aaron . . . [the man]_{2455-my boss} can kiss . “ [Jameson]_186-jameson , ”_{[2455-my boss]} [I]_2959-i breathe against [him]_{2455-my boss} . “ [We]_2722-we should n’t . ”_{[2455-my boss]} [His]_{2455-my boss} hands roam up and down [my]_2959-i body , and [God]_0-aaron , [he]_{2455-my boss} feels so good . “ Do n’t fight [me]_{2455-my boss} on this , ”_{[2455-my boss]} [he]_{2455-my boss} murmurs as [he]_{2455-my boss} grinds [me]_2959-i up against the wall with [his]_{2455-my boss} hips . “ [I]_{2455-my boss} ca n’t . ”_{[2455-my boss]} “ [You]_{2455-my boss} can , and [you]_{2455-my boss} will . Why would [you]_{2455-my boss} deny [your]_{2455-my boss} body what it so desperately needs from [me]_{2455-my boss} ? ”_{[2455-my boss]} Oh God , [he]_{2455-my boss} ’s so right . [My]_2959-i body does need [his]_{2455-my boss} body . . . hard . So fucking hard . [Our]_957-we kiss turns desperate , and [my]_2959-i hands go to [his]_{2455-my boss} hair . [I]_2959-i know this is crazy , but [I]_2959-i want [him]_{2455-my boss} . . . all of [him]_{2455-my boss} , and not just [his]_{2455-my boss} body . For a long time , [we]_957-we kiss like [we]_957-we ’re [the only two people left on earth]_{958-the only two people left on earth} . Hidden up against the wall , [his]_{2455-my boss} body grinding on [mine]_2959-i . Two bodies chasing [their]_{958-the only two people left on earth} own pleasure in the darkness . “ [I]_{2455-my boss} need [you]_{2455-my boss} , ”_{[2455-my boss]} [he]_{2455-my boss} murmurs against [my]_2959-i lips . [I]_2959-i pant as [his]_{2455-my boss} open mouth drops to [my]_2959-i neck . [God]_0-aaron . . . the way [he]_{2455-my boss} touches [me]_2959-i is just so . . . “ [Jameson]_186-jameson . ”_[0-aaron] “ Now . ”_{[2455-my boss]} [He]_{2455-my boss} pins [me]_2959-i to the wall , and [I]_2959-i feel [his]_{2455-my boss} cock pulse . [Jesus]_107-jesus , [he]_{2455-my boss} ’s close . [He]_{2455-my boss} does need [me]_2959-i . “ [My]_{2455-my boss} place , ”_{[2455-my boss]} [he]_{2455-my boss} pants against [my]_2959-i lips . “ [My]_2959-i place , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i fire back . “ No , [my]_{2455-my boss} place , ”_{[2455-my boss]} [he]_{2455-my boss} demands . [I]_2959-i pull back to look at [his]_{2455-my boss} face . “ It ’s [my]_{2455-my boss} place or nothing . Take it or leave it . ”_{[2455-my boss]} [He]_{2455-my boss} clenches [his]_{2455-my boss} jaw ; it ’s obvious [he]_{2455-my boss} hates losing a fight . . . any fight . “ Fine . ”_{[2455-my boss]} [He]_{2455-my boss} grabs [my]_2959-i hand . “ This way . ”_{[2455-my boss]} “ No . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pull [my]_2959-i hand out of [his]_{2455-my boss} grip . “ [I]_{2455-my boss} do n’t want [anyone]_272-anyone to see [us]_2724-us . ”_{[2455-my boss]} [He]_{2455-my boss} frowns in question . “ [You]_{2455-my boss} ’re [[my]_2959-i boss]_{2455-my boss} , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i remind [him]_{2455-my boss} . “ [I]_{2455-my boss} ’m here with [work friends]_{2725-work friends} . ”_{[2455-my boss]} [He]_{2455-my boss} rolls [his]_{2455-my boss} eyes . “ Fine . Go and say goodbye , and [I]_{2455-my boss} ’ll wait for [you]_{2455-my boss} [downstairs]_{2454-downstairs} . [You]_{2455-my boss} have two minutes before [I]_{2455-my boss} come up and drag [you]_{2455-my boss} out . ”_{[2455-my boss]} [He]_{2455-my boss} gives [me]_2959-i a long , lingering kiss , and [I]_2959-i turn , and [he]_{2455-my boss} swats [me]_2959-i on the behind . Adrenaline courses through [my]_2959-i veins as [I]_2959-i walk over to [[my]_2959-i friends]_{546-my friends} . [He]_{2455-my boss} ’s here . [I]_2959-i ’m going with [him]_{2455-my boss} . It ’s on . Excitement fills [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i try to act casual . “ Hey , where ’s [the god]_{2547-the god} ? ”_[146-renee] [Renee]_146-renee asks . “ Oh . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ [He]_{2455-my boss} was a dick , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i lie . [Ava]_77-ava rolls [her]_77-ava eyes . “ Typical . Men who look that good ca n’t be blessed with brains too . ”_[77-ava] [I]_2959-i smirk . [I]_2959-i know [someone who was blessed with both]_{960-someone who was blessed with both} , but [I]_2959-i ’ll just keep that under [my]_2959-i hat . [I]_2959-i look over and see [Jameson]_186-jameson walking toward [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} , and [he]_186-jameson gives [me]_2959-i the hurry - up look . [I]_2959-i smile ; the pull to [him]_186-jameson is strong . “ [Guys]_681-guys , [I]_2959-i ’m going to go . ”_[2959-i] “ What ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [Their]_962-they faces fall . “ Why ? The night is young . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [I]_2959-i know . [I]_2959-i ’ve had such a great time , but [my]_2959-i feet are killing [me]_2959-i . These stupid new shoes are hell on earth . Next weekend [I]_2959-i ’ll make it up to [you]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i promise . [I]_2959-i ’ll just jump in [a cab]_{707-a cab} [downstairs]_{2454-downstairs} . ”_[2959-i] “ Okay . ”_[962-they] [They]_962-they roll [their]_962-they eyes and kiss [me]_2959-i on the cheek . “ Text [me]_77-ava when [you]_2959-i get [home]_2289-home , ”_[77-ava] [Ava]_77-ava says . “ [I]_2959-i will . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile , grateful that [they]_962-they are n’t bothered at all . “ Thanks for asking [me]_2959-i to come . ”_[2959-i] [Two guys]_{905-the girls} walk up to [us]_{905-the girls} , and [the girls]_{905-the girls} both smile broadly . [I]_2959-i take that as [my]_2959-i out . “ See [you]_2959-i , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i call as [I]_2959-i walk toward [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} . “ Bye , ”_[962-they] [they]_962-they call . [I]_2959-i jump in [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} . “ Where to ? ”_{[278-the attendant]} [the attendant]_{278-the attendant} asks . “ Ground floor . ”_{[278-the attendant]} [He]_{278-the attendant} pushes the button , and [we]_{905-the girls} make [our]_{905-the girls} descent . [My]_2959-i heart is hammering in [my]_2959-i chest . [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson makes [me]_2959-i nervous as all hell . [I]_2959-i ca n’t remember when [a man]_246-alan made [me]_2959-i this excited to get [him]_246-alan alone . Act cool . . . just act cool . [The elevator]_{375-the elevator} doors open , and [I]_2959-i walk out and look around . Where is [he]_246-alan ? [I]_2959-i continue through [the foyer]_{670-the foyer} and peer out to [the busy street]_{968-the busy street} ; [I]_2959-i ca n’t see [him]_246-alan . What the hell ? Did [he]_246-alan leave without [me]_2959-i ? “ Lose something ? ”_[246-alan] a deep voice asks from behind [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i turn to see [Jameson]_186-jameson leaning up against the wall , and [my]_2959-i heart somersaults in [my]_2959-i chest . [I]_2959-i walk over , and [he]_246-alan takes [me]_2959-i in [his]_246-alan arms . “ [I]_246-alan did , actually . ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i smile up at [him]_246-alan . [We]_969-we kiss softly , and it ’s different from how [we]_969-we normally kiss ; it ’s tender and sweet , as if [he]_246-alan ’s been waiting to get [me]_2959-i alone too . “ Let ’s go [home]_2289-home , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan whispers . [I]_2959-i smile . That sounds so good . “ Okay . ”_[246-alan] [We]_969-we walk out the front , and [he]_246-alan hails [a cab]_{707-a cab} . Ten minutes later , [we]_969-we pull up in front of [[my]_2959-i apartment]_{766-my apartment} . “ Thank [you]_246-alan , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say as [I]_2959-i climb out . [I]_2959-i turn and hand [Jameson]_186-jameson twenty dollars , and [he]_246-alan shakes [his]_246-alan head as if annoyed . “ [I]_246-alan ’ve got it , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan says . [He]_246-alan climbs out , and [we]_969-we walk through [the foyer]_{382-this building} , hand in hand , as [he]_246-alan remains silent . “ Where are [the doormen]_{2733-the doormen} ? ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan asks as [he]_246-alan looks around . “ There are [no doormen]_{2734-no doormen} . ”_[246-alan] “ There ’s no security in [this building]_{382-this building} ? ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan frowns in surprise . “ There ’s security . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i point to the intercom on the wall . “ [Nobody]_2321-nobody can get up without being let in . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan frowns as [he]_246-alan assesses it . “ [Any fucker]_{2735-any fucker} could walk in here . ”_[246-alan] “ [You]_{2735-any fucker} are said fucker tonight . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smirk . [He]_246-alan chuckles as [he]_246-alan wraps [his]_246-alan arms around [me]_2959-i . “ That [I]_246-alan am . ”_[246-alan] [We]_973-we ride to [my]_2959-i floor and walk down [the corridor]_{609-the corridor} ; [my]_2959-i heart is beating so fast . This is different from the other times [we]_973-we ’ve been together . Normally [we]_973-we ’re so blinded with arousal that [we]_973-we do n’t even remember walking through the front door . [I]_2959-i open the door and lead [him]_246-alan into [[my]_2959-i apartment]_{758-the bedroom} , and [I]_2959-i hold [my]_2959-i breath as [his]_246-alan eyes scan the space . [[My]_2959-i apartment]_{758-the bedroom} is tiny — it would literally fit into [[his]_246-alan bedroom]_{758-the bedroom} . “ It ’s nice , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan says . [I]_2959-i giggle . “ [You]_246-alan ’re [a terrible liar]_246-alan . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan chuckles and takes [me]_2959-i into [his]_246-alan arms . “ Anywhere with [you]_246-alan is good . ”_[246-alan] [Our]_973-we eyes lock , and something changes between [us]_973-we . The anger and animosity between [us]_973-we has been replaced with tenderness . [The man [I]_2959-i met in [Boston]_{385-new york}]_{976-the man i met in boston} is [here]_{385-new york} . “ Are [you]_246-alan hungry ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ [We]_973-we could get some Uber Eats . Caramel cheesecake . ”_[2959-i] “ What the fuck ? [You]_246-alan do n’t actually get [Uber Eats]_{153-uber eats} , do [you]_246-alan ? ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan asks , horrified . “ All the time . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug . “ Are [you]_246-alan serious ? ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan stammers . “ [You]_246-alan actually give [strangers]_{2736-strangers} access to [your]_246-alan food ? ”_[246-alan] “ [They]_{2736-strangers} ’re delivery [drivers]_2737-drivers . Why would n’t [I]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] “ [They]_{2736-strangers} see a meal for one . Put some [Rohypnol]_154-rohypnol into [your]_246-alan food , wait for half an hour until [they]_{2736-strangers} know [you]_246-alan ’ve eaten it and are unconscious , and then come back , break in , and take advantage of [your]_246-alan body . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan dusts [his]_246-alan hands in front of [him]_246-alan . “ Boom , easiest crime in history . ”_[246-alan] [My]_2959-i face falls . “ What ? ”_[0-aaron] [God]_0-aaron , [I]_2959-i ’ve never thought of that . “ True story , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan says as [he]_246-alan walks around [[my]_2959-i apartment]_{766-my apartment} . “ If [I]_246-alan were [a rapist]_{2738-a rapist} , that ’s what [I]_246-alan would do . ”_[246-alan] “ [I]_246-alan do n’t know whether to be impressed or terrified by [your]_246-alan evil thought process . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan turns back to [me]_2959-i , and [his]_246-alan face softens . “ Impressed — let ’s go with impressed . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i giggle as [he]_246-alan takes [me]_2959-i into [his]_246-alan arms . “ Okay , ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i murmur . “ Impressed it is . Why have [you]_246-alan been so cranky with [me]_2959-i this week ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask softly as [I]_2959-i run [my]_2959-i fingers through [his]_246-alan dark hair . “ Because [you]_246-alan ’re fighting with [me]_246-alan , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan whispers . “ [I]_246-alan do n’t like it . ”_[246-alan] [His]_246-alan lips take [mine]_2959-i , and [his]_246-alan tongue swipes softly through [my]_2959-i lips . “ [I]_246-alan ’m not fighting now . ”_[246-alan] “ And look how fucking beautiful [you]_246-alan are , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan says tenderly as [he]_246-alan cups [my]_2959-i face in [his]_246-alan hands . [Our]_978-our kiss deepens , and [I]_2959-i want [him]_246-alan naked . In [my]_2959-i bed and naked . [I]_2959-i slide [his]_246-alan shirt off over [his]_246-alan head and unzip [his]_246-alan pants ; [his]_246-alan lips stay locked on [mine]_2959-i as if [he]_246-alan ’s unable to drag them away . [His]_246-alan chest is broad with a scattering of dark hair , and [his]_246-alan stomach is rippled . . . but it ’s [his]_246-alan dick that ’s a standout . [The man]_246-alan ’s hung like a horse . [I]_2959-i do n’t know if this thing even goes down . [I]_2959-i most definitely have never seen it soft . “ [You]_246-alan need to get on [my]_2959-i bed on [your]_246-alan back now , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper as [my]_2959-i eyes drop down [his]_246-alan delicious naked body . [He]_246-alan smiles broadly . “ That ’s the best thing [you]_246-alan ’ve ever said to [me]_246-alan . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan drags [me]_2959-i through [the apartment]_{2627-the apartment} by [my]_2959-i hand and into [[my]_2959-i bedroom]_{980-my bedroom} ; in one quick movement , [he]_246-alan ’s unzipped [my]_2959-i dress , and then [he]_246-alan slowly slides it down . [He]_246-alan holds [my]_2959-i hand as [I]_2959-i step out of it , and [his]_246-alan eyes drop hungrily down [my]_2959-i body . “ [You]_246-alan are so fucking beautiful , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_[246-alan] [My]_2959-i heart swells at the way [he]_246-alan is looking at [me]_2959-i . [He]_246-alan lays [me]_2959-i down and spreads [my]_2959-i legs and slowly strokes [himself]_246-alan as [he]_246-alan stares down . [I]_2959-i writhe as [I]_2959-i wait for [his]_246-alan touch . [His]_246-alan lips take [my]_2959-i nipple into [his]_246-alan mouth , and [my]_2959-i back arches off the bed . [His]_246-alan fingers slide through the lips of [my]_2959-i sex . [He]_246-alan hisses in approval as [he]_246-alan feels how wet [I]_2959-i am . [My]_2959-i breath quivers on the inhale . [He]_246-alan ’s just so . . . [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson knows how to touch [a woman]_{339-a woman} . Everything is magnified , to the point where even [his]_246-alan blazing stare could make [me]_2959-i orgasm . [His]_246-alan lips make a delicious trail down [my]_2959-i body , and [he]_246-alan kisses [my]_2959-i inner thighs with [his]_246-alan open mouth . [My]_2959-i hands go to the back of [his]_246-alan head . [His]_246-alan hands hold [my]_2959-i legs wide open , and [his]_246-alan thick , strong tongue swipes through [me]_2959-i . [My]_2959-i back arches in pleasure as [my]_2959-i head tips back to the ceiling . “ Oh God . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan licks [me]_2959-i , slowly at first , and then as if [he]_246-alan ’s unable to control [himself]_246-alan , [he]_246-alan begins to really eat [me]_2959-i . [His]_246-alan stubble burns [my]_2959-i sex as [my]_2959-i body begins to ride [his]_246-alan face . “ Oh . . . so good , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whimper . [He]_246-alan lifts [my]_2959-i legs to sit over [his]_246-alan shoulders , and the change in position has [my]_2959-i body trembling with need . “ Oh God , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whimper as [my]_2959-i hands fist in [his]_246-alan hair . “ Come . [I]_246-alan want to taste [you]_246-alan , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan moans into [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i convulse and shudder deep inside [my]_2959-i body as [I]_2959-i cling to [him]_246-alan . [He]_246-alan laps [me]_2959-i up like [I]_2959-i ’m [his]_246-alan last supper . [He]_246-alan pulls back and unwraps a condom and passes it to [me]_2959-i ; [I]_2959-i slide it on [him]_246-alan with a soft kiss to [his]_246-alan cock . With [his]_246-alan eyes locked on [mine]_2959-i , [he]_246-alan lifts [my]_2959-i legs around [his]_246-alan waist and in one strong movement slides deep into [my]_2959-i sex . [We]_982-our stare at each other as the air is knocked from [our]_982-our lungs . “ So fucking good , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan whispers as [our]_982-our eyes search each other . [He]_246-alan pulls out and then slowly slides back in . [My]_2959-i mouth hangs slack at the feeling of [his]_246-alan possession . [Nobody]_2321-nobody fucks [me]_2959-i like [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson . . . [nobody]_2321-nobody . [I]_2959-i can try to deny this emotional attachment all [I]_2959-i want , but the physical . . . [I]_2959-i just ca n’t . [He]_246-alan circles deep inside and then slams back in . [I]_2959-i cry out as the air is knocked from [my]_2959-i lungs . Then [he]_246-alan ’s riding [me]_2959-i — deep , punishing hits — and [my]_2959-i bed is hitting the wall so hard it may knock it down . “ Fuck , fuck , fuck , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan moans into [my]_2959-i neck . [He]_246-alan lifts one of [my]_2959-i legs , and [I]_2959-i ca n’t hold it any longer . [My]_2959-i body contracts around [his]_246-alan , and [he]_246-alan hisses as [he]_246-alan comes with [me]_2959-i . [We]_983-we cling to each other as [we]_983-we pant , and [I]_2959-i smile up against [his]_246-alan cheek as euphoria runs through [my]_2959-i blood . [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson is [my]_2959-i new drug . And [I]_2959-i am [[his]_246-alan crack whore]_{984-his crack whore} . [I]_2959-i wake to the gentle breathing beside [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i roll over and smile . [Jameson]_186-jameson is flat on [his]_186-jameson back and asleep . [We]_983-we had an incredible night . [The tender , witty guy]_{985-the tender , witty guy} was back . . . with no sight of [the asshole CEO]_{986-the asshole ceo} . [I]_2959-i lean up onto [my]_2959-i elbow as [I]_2959-i watch [him]_{985-the tender , witty guy} . [His]_{985-the tender , witty guy} dark hair hangs over [his]_{985-the tender , witty guy} forehead , [his]_{985-the tender , witty guy} big red lips are slightly open , and [his]_{985-the tender , witty guy} eyelashes flutter as [he]_{985-the tender , witty guy} sleeps . [He]_{985-the tender , witty guy} has one arm behind [his]_{985-the tender , witty guy} head , and the other is splayed on [his]_{985-the tender , witty guy} stomach . [He]_{985-the tender , witty guy} ’s beautiful — everything about [him]_{985-the tender , witty guy} physically is beautiful . Last night [I]_2959-i got a little peek that maybe [he]_{985-the tender , witty guy} ’s as beautiful on the inside as well . Stop it . [You]_987-you ’re getting clingy and attached . [Jameson]_186-jameson is not [the kind of man [you]_989-you get attached to]_{988-the kind of man you get attached to} . [He]_186-jameson inhales deeply as [he]_186-jameson wakes , and slowly [his]_186-jameson eyes open and focus on [me]_2959-i . “ Hey , beautiful , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson whispers in a husky voice as [he]_186-jameson cups [my]_2959-i face in [his]_186-jameson hand . [I]_2959-i smile and lean over and kiss [him]_186-jameson . “ Good morning , [Jameson]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] “ Call [me]_2959-i [Jay]_108-jay . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown in question . “ [[My]_2959-i friends]_{546-my friends} call [me]_2959-i [Jay]_108-jay . ”_[2959-i] “ So [we]_{546-my friends} ’re friends ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson pulls [me]_2959-i over [his]_186-jameson body onto [his]_186-jameson chest . “ No , [you]_186-jameson ’re [my]_2959-i fuck bunny . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile as [I]_2959-i kiss [his]_186-jameson chest beneath [me]_2959-i . “ What ’s planned for today ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson asks . “ Nothing . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson frowns as if trying to focus [his]_186-jameson eyes , and [he]_186-jameson pinches the bridge of [his]_186-jameson nose . “ [I]_186-jameson ’ll get [[my]_186-jameson driver]_{2740-my driver} to pick [us]_2741-we up , and [I]_186-jameson ’ll make [us]_2741-we some breakfast at [[my]_186-jameson place]_{2742-my place} . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i lean up onto [my]_2959-i elbow and look down at [him]_186-jameson . “ What ’s wrong with here ? [I]_2959-i ’ve got breakfast things [you]_2743-you can cook . ”_[2959-i] “ Nothing . [I]_2959-i just feel more comfortable at [[my]_2959-i place]_{2742-my place} . [We]_2741-we will hang there today . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i ’m more comfortable here , [Jameson]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reply , slightly annoyed . “ What ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson winces . “ How could [you]_2743-you be ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sit up , affronted . “ What ’s that supposed to mean ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . [He]_186-jameson rolls [his]_186-jameson eyes . “ Here [we]_2741-we go a - fucking - gain . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ What ’s that supposed to mean ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [You]_2743-you asked that question twice , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson replies dryly . “ Do [you]_2743-you have to argue about every fucking thing that [we]_2741-we do ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [I]_186-jameson ’m not arguing . [I]_186-jameson ’m just saying [I]_186-jameson want to stay [here]_{385-new york} today . [[Your]_2743-you apartment]_{2745-your apartment} may be fancy , but it does n’t impress [me]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson stares at [me]_2959-i for a moment . “ And for the record , [I]_186-jameson do n’t argue about everything . [I]_186-jameson was annoyed that [your]_2743-you masseuse is on personal terms to message [you]_2743-you the way [she]_2746-she did . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson rolls [his]_186-jameson eyes and puts the back of [his]_186-jameson forearm over [them]_990-them . “ Here [we]_2747-we go . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Will [you]_2743-you stop saying that ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap as [I]_2959-i get out of bed and put on [my]_2959-i robe . “ [I]_2959-i was just lying here thinking how gorgeous [you]_2743-you are , and then [you]_2743-you go and open [your]_2743-you big mouth and ruin the whole thing . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_186-jameson ’m thinking the same thing , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson snaps as [he]_186-jameson gets out of bed . “ And stop going on about [Chloe]_135-chloe — it ’s not a relationship . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stop still . What the hell does [he]_186-jameson mean by that ? “ What do [you]_135-chloe mean , it ’s not a relationship ? Do [you]_135-chloe and [she]_135-chloe have sex ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson bends and picks up [his]_186-jameson jeans , ignoring [me]_2959-i . “ Jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i put [my]_2959-i hands on [my]_2959-i hips as [I]_2959-i watch [him]_186-jameson . [He]_186-jameson pulls [his]_186-jameson jeans on and zips them up . “ Sometimes . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [You]_135-chloe have sex with [her]_135-chloe ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i gasp . “ [I]_2959-i have a standing appointment on Tuesdays and Thursdays . [She]_135-chloe does n’t come for sex , but sometimes it just happens . [She]_135-chloe ’s touching [me]_2959-i , [I]_2959-i ’m oiled up . . . it just happens . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i mouth falls open . “ Did [you]_135-chloe have sex with [her]_135-chloe this last week ? Since [you]_135-chloe ’ve been with [me]_186-jameson ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson rolls [his]_186-jameson eyes . “ Stop rolling [your]_135-chloe fucking eyes at [me]_2959-i , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . “ No . [I]_2959-i did n’t have sex with [her]_135-chloe this week . ”_[2959-i] “ Did [you]_135-chloe have [your]_135-chloe regular two massages ? ”_[2959-i] “ Yes . ”_[2959-i] “ So [you]_135-chloe had [someone else]_{433-someone else} ’s hands all over [your]_135-chloe body ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i fume . “ Like [you]_135-chloe did last night on the dance floor . Stop looking for a fucking fight , [Emily]_186-jameson . [You]_135-chloe are pissing [me]_2959-i off . ”_[2959-i] “ Well , [you]_135-chloe ’re pissing [me]_2959-i off . Get out . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_186-jameson ’m already fucking leaving , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson barks . “ Go and have a massage today , [you]_135-chloe big sleazebag . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson shakes [his]_186-jameson head in disgust . “ [You]_135-chloe know what ? [You]_135-chloe ’re perfect for this fake news job . This drama thing is right up [[your]_135-chloe alley]_{2749-your alley} . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson throws [his]_186-jameson shirt over [his]_186-jameson head and then sits on the bed to put [his]_186-jameson shoes on . Rage fills [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i pick up one of [his]_186-jameson shoes and throw it to the other side of [the room]_{514-the room} . “ So tough , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson huffs . [I]_2959-i narrow [my]_2959-i eyes as fury boils in [my]_2959-i blood . “ Yeah , like [your]_135-chloe [Chloe]_135-chloe ’s vagina . How many clients does [she]_135-chloe fuck each week ? ”_[2959-i] “ [She]_135-chloe is n’t [my]_186-jameson Chloe . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [You]_135-chloe know what ? Make [her]_135-chloe [[your]_135-chloe Chloe]_135-chloe , because [I]_2959-i have no intention of taking [her]_135-chloe sloppy seconds . ”_[2959-i] “ What ’s that supposed to mean ? ”_[2959-i] “ It means that [you]_135-chloe sleep with [me]_186-jameson and only [me]_186-jameson , or [you]_135-chloe get out of [my]_186-jameson life . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson puts [his]_186-jameson hands on [his]_186-jameson hips in outrage . “ [I]_186-jameson ’m not looking for a relationship . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Good . There ’s [my]_2959-i answer . Get out . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_135-chloe know what ? This little [Dr. Jekyll]_{155-dr. jekyll} and [Mr. Hyde]_{156-mr. hyde} thing [you]_135-chloe ’ve got going on here is a real turnoff . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ And [your]_135-chloe overshared dick is n’t ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shriek . “ [You]_135-chloe ’re an insult to [my]_2959-i intelligence , [Jameson]_186-jameson . Go [home]_2289-home to [[your]_135-chloe fancy apartment]_{2751-your fancy apartment} in [[your]_135-chloe fancy car]_{2751-your fancy apartment} and have sex with whoever [you]_135-chloe want . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i wrap [my]_2959-i robe around [me]_2959-i in disgust . “ [I]_2959-i ’m too good for [you]_135-chloe anyway . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i glares at [me]_2959-i . “ Why are [you]_135-chloe such [a fucking bitch]_{2752-a fucking bitch} ? ”_[2959-i] “ Because [you]_135-chloe ’re [a self - centered asshole]_{2752-a fucking bitch} . Get the hell out ! ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i scream . [I]_2959-i pick up a pillow and throw it at [him]_2959-i . [He]_2959-i brushes past [me]_2959-i in a rush . “ [Nobody]_2321-nobody treats [me]_2959-i as bad as [you]_135-chloe do , [Emily]_186-jameson ! ”_[2959-i] [he]_2959-i yells as [he]_2959-i storms toward the door . “ Because [you]_135-chloe pay [them]_2754-them ! ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i screech . “ Good thing [you]_135-chloe ’ve got lots of money , [Jameson]_186-jameson . [You]_135-chloe ’re going to need it . [Nobody]_2321-nobody would put up with [your]_135-chloe shit for free . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i turns and glares at [me]_2959-i . “ That ’s a low blow . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i fake a smile . “ Have a nice life , [asshole]_2756-asshole . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i turn and walk into [[my]_2959-i bathroom]_{992-my bathroom} and lock the door . Screw [him]_2959-i . Chapter 11 [I]_2959-i turn the spoon upside down , put it into [my]_2959-i mouth , and suck the [Nutella]_157-nutella from it as [I]_2959-i stare at the television . It ’s four in the afternoon , [I]_2959-i ’m still in [my]_2959-i pajamas , and [I]_2959-i ’ve had a shitty day . After [I]_2959-i woke up in a dream lying next to [the most gorgeous man on [the planet]_{994-the planet}]_{993-the most gorgeous man on the planet} , [Jameson]_186-jameson Miles [the asshole CEO]_{986-the asshole ceo} decided to make an appearance and ruined everything . To be honest , [I]_2959-i ’m regretting not going to [[his]_{993-the most gorgeous man on the planet} place]_{2489-his place} for breakfast , but then , on the other hand , [I]_2959-i ’m glad [I]_2959-i did n’t because [I]_2959-i would n’t have found out about [Chloe]_135-chloe , [his]_{993-the most gorgeous man on the planet} masseuse . [They]_997-they fuck . [I]_2959-i hate that it bothers [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i hate that [I]_2959-i can feel [myself]_2959-i getting attached to [him]_{993-the most gorgeous man on the planet} when [he]_{993-the most gorgeous man on the planet} clearly is n’t feeling the same . [I]_2959-i dig into [my]_2959-i jar of [Nutella]_157-nutella again . The smooth chocolate melts on [my]_2959-i tongue , offering a momentary distraction . [I]_2959-i stare at the television in a daze , a horror movie . [My]_2959-i favorite rom - com category is scratched from the viewing repertoire . [My]_2959-i mind goes back to the first time [I]_2959-i met [Jameson]_186-jameson , when [he]_186-jameson told [me]_2959-i that [he]_186-jameson did n’t believe rom - coms were true . Maybe [he]_186-jameson was on to something ? Maybe [I]_2959-i ’m just [a romantic fool]_{998-a romantic fool} ? Does [he]_186-jameson have feelings for [Chloe]_135-chloe ? Who cares ? [He]_186-jameson ’s [an asshole]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i need to cut this out . Stop thinking about [him]_186-jameson . [He]_186-jameson ’s [a self - absorbed player who sleeps with whoever [he]_186-jameson wants , whenever [he]_186-jameson wants]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i look around [[my]_2959-i shitty apartment]_{999-my shitty apartment} , and sadness fills [me]_2959-i . If [he]_186-jameson liked [me]_2959-i , it would n’t matter where [we]_1000-we were — [he]_186-jameson would want to spend time with [me]_2959-i regardless . But [he]_186-jameson could n’t get out of here quick enough . [My]_2959-i mind goes over [our]_1000-we fight this morning . “ [Nobody]_2321-nobody treats [me]_2959-i as bad as [you]_2758-you do , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] “ Because [you]_2758-you pay [them]_2759-them . Good thing [you]_2758-you ’ve got lots of money , [Jameson]_186-jameson . [You]_2758-you ’re going to need it . [Nobody]_2321-nobody would put up with [your]_2758-you shit for free . ”_[2959-i] “ That ’s a low blow . ”_[2959-i] Did [I]_2959-i go too far ? Was it a low blow ? Probably , but what does [he]_186-jameson expect ? And [I]_2959-i ca n’t believe that [nobody]_2321-nobody treats [him]_186-jameson as badly as [I]_2959-i do . If [he]_186-jameson treats [other women]_{1002-other women} the way [he]_186-jameson treats [me]_2959-i , surely [they]_{1002-other women} would n’t put up with it ? [Nobody]_2321-nobody is that stupid . . . are [they]_{1002-other women} ? “ [I]_2959-i ’m not looking for a relationship . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i punch the pillow on [my]_2959-i lap in disgust . Six words have never made [me]_2959-i feel so cheap . Monday morning , [I]_2959-i ride in [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} to [the top floor]_{607-the top floor} . [We]_1006-we scheduled this meeting last week so that [I]_2959-i could meet [the private investigator]_{1007-the private investigator} , but it ’s the last thing [I]_2959-i want to do now . [I]_2959-i want to forget [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson , forget [I]_2959-i ever met [beautiful Jim]_266-jim . . . or [Jay]_108-jay , or whatever the heck [I]_2959-i ’m supposed to call [him]_266-jim . [I]_2959-i ’ve come to the realization that [they]_{1002-other women} ’re a package deal , and unfortunately , [I]_2959-i ca n’t have [Jim]_266-jim without [Jameson]_186-jameson , even though it ’s only [Jim]_266-jim [I]_2959-i want . So [I]_2959-i ’m doing what ’s best for [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i ’m cutting ties ; [I]_2959-i ’m not falling into the pattern of sleeping with [Jameson]_186-jameson without strings in the hope that [I]_2959-i get a glimpse of [Jim]_266-jim every now and then . It would be easy . . . too easy . But [I]_2959-i already know [my]_2959-i poor heart could n’t take it . [I]_2959-i ’m not wired for casual sex . It ’s just not who [I]_2959-i am . [I]_2959-i ’m going to be professional and try to concentrate on [my]_2959-i job . If [I]_2959-i did n’t have to see [him]_186-jameson , it would be so much easier , but it is what it is . [I]_2959-i need to learn to deal with it . [He]_186-jameson ’s not going anywhere , and [I]_2959-i really want this job . Damn it , [Emily]_186-jameson , why do [you]_186-jameson always take the hard way ? Why do [you]_186-jameson always fall for [the wrong guy]_{1008-the wrong guy} ? [The last man]_56-robbie had no motivation , and [this man]_56-robbie has too much . [Both men]_{1010-both men} did n’t care enough to go the extra mile for [me]_2959-i . Maybe [my]_2959-i expectations are too high from [[my]_2959-i book boyfriends]_{1011-my book boyfriends} in [my]_2959-i romance novels — maybe [Jameson]_186-jameson was right on that one . But damn it , [I]_2959-i want the fucking fairy tale for once . [The elevator]_{375-the elevator} door opens , and [I]_2959-i walk out and through reception . “ Good morning , [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] [Sammia]_246-alan says . “ Morning . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . “ Just go through to [[his]_186-jameson office]_{426-his office} . ”_[2959-i] “ Thanks . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i walk down [the corridor]_{609-the corridor} and knock on [his]_186-jameson door . “ Come in , ”_{[186-jameson]} [his]_186-jameson deep voice calls . [I]_2959-i close [my]_2959-i eyes and brace [myself]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i drop [my]_2959-i shoulders and open the door . [I]_2959-i stop on the spot . Shit . [The room]_{514-the room} is full of [men]_{378-the men} . “ Come in , ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson says , devoid of emotion . “ Take a seat . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Thanks . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i drop nervously into the seat near the end of the large rectangular table . [Jameson]_186-jameson sits at the head , and [Tristan]_2430-tristan , [Elliot]_140-elliot , [Christopher]_{141-christopher} , and [an older man]_{1016-an older man} are on [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s left . Then there are [another six men [I]_2959-i have never seen before]_{1017-another six men i have never seen before} . [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ This is [Emily Foster]_186-jameson , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson introduces [me]_2959-i . “ Hello , ”_{[378-the men]} [the men]_{378-the men} all say . [I]_2959-i smile awkwardly as [I]_2959-i look around the table . “ [Emily]_186-jameson , this is [[my]_186-jameson father]_{1016-an older man} , [George]_0-aaron . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson gestures to [the older man]_{1016-an older man} . “ Hello , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper nervously . “ Hello , [dear]_0-aaron . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson smiles warmly ; [he]_186-jameson ’s in [his]_186-jameson sixties and looks like an older version of [Jameson]_186-jameson and [Elliot]_140-elliot . Gorgeous and distinguished with those piercing blue eyes . “ This is [Martin]_158-martin and [Gerrard]_159-gerrard , [Max]_160-max and [Barry]_161-barry , ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson says as [he]_186-jameson points around the table . “ And on the end are [Calvin]_162-calvin and [Jake]_108-jay . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Hello . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i force a smile . [I]_2959-i ’ll never remember all these names . “ This is [the corporate investigation team]_{2762-the corporate investigation team} , ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson continues . “ [Jake]_108-jay will be the eyes on the floor , and [the other five men]_{2763-the other five men} will be assessing the data that ’s collected . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i watch [him]_186-jameson as [he]_186-jameson talks , devoid of emotion , and [my]_2959-i heart cracks a little . [He]_186-jameson ’s completely unrattled by [me]_2959-i . . . by [us]_1018-us . There is no [us]_1018-us . “ Okay . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile as [I]_2959-i look around at [the team]_{1019-the team} . “ Nice to meet [you]_108-jay all . ”_[2959-i] “ [We]_1018-us are going to hit the ground running this morning , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson continues . “ [Emily]_186-jameson , [you]_108-jay are going to show [Jake]_108-jay around , and then [you]_108-jay will be reporting directly to [Tristan]_2430-tristan in regards to the stories [you]_108-jay are putting forward . ”_{[186-jameson]} [My]_2959-i heart drops , and [I]_2959-i nod . [My]_2959-i eyes go to [Tristan]_2430-tristan , and [he]_186-jameson smiles warmly . [He]_186-jameson knows why [I]_2959-i ’ve been designated to [him]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i feel like throwing [myself]_2959-i on the floor and having a crying tantrum . “ Thank [you]_186-jameson . That ’s great , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i lie . For the next fifteen minutes , [I]_2959-i sit in [my]_2959-i chair and stare at [the CEO]_246-alan as [he]_246-alan runs through the day ’s events with [a controlled detachment]_{1021-a controlled detachment} . [He]_246-alan ’s assertive , hard , and fiercely intelligent , and [the room]_{514-the room} hangs on to [his]_246-alan every word . And [he]_246-alan fucks [his]_246-alan masseuse on Tuesdays and Thursdays . [I]_2959-i do n’t know how [I]_2959-i got [myself]_2959-i into this messed - up situation , but it has to end . Well . . . it ’s already ended , so [I]_2959-i do n’t need to bother anyway . “ Thank [you]_2764-you ; that wraps it up . [I]_246-alan would like a report on [my]_246-alan desk at four thirty every afternoon , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan tells [the men from [the investigation company]_{1024-the investigation company}]_{1023-the men from the investigation company} . “ Yes , [sir]_246-alan , ”_{[1023-the men from the investigation company]} [they]_{1023-the men from the investigation company} reply as [everyone]_{2304-everyone} stands . [I]_2959-i wait at the back , unsure whether to leave or not . “ [Emily]_186-jameson , just a minute , please , ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson asks . [My]_2959-i heart flips . “ Yes . ”_[2959-i] “ Can [you]_2764-you take [Jake]_108-jay down to [your]_2764-you floor under the guise that [he]_108-jay ’s new and that [you]_2764-you two are going through a training program together ? ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes search [his]_246-alan . [He]_246-alan stares at [me]_2959-i blankly , cold as ice . “ Sure . ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i turn to [Jake]_108-jay and smile . “ Are [you]_108-jay ready now ? ”_[2959-i] “ Show [me]_108-jay the way , ”_[108-jay] [Jake]_108-jay says playfully . “ After [you]_108-jay . ”_[108-jay] [I]_2959-i turn and walk out of [the office]_{385-new york} with [my]_2959-i heart dripping into [my]_2959-i high - heeled pumps . Well , that ’s the end of that . [He]_246-alan ’s done . [I]_2959-i wish [I]_2959-i were . [I]_2959-i ’ll get there — [I]_2959-i always do . [I]_2959-i sit in the café at the bench seat by the window and stare at the limo waiting outside [Miles Media]_{14-miles media} from across [the street]_{550-the street} . It ’s been a long week , and today was especially flat . It ’s Thursday , massage day . [I]_2959-i get a vision of [Jameson]_186-jameson oiled up on the table and [another woman roaming [her]_{1028-another woman roaming her hands over his body} hands over [his]_{1028-another woman roaming her hands over his body} body]_{1028-another woman roaming her hands over his body} ; [my]_2959-i stomach clenches as [I]_2959-i picture it so clearly . [My]_2959-i mind ’s playing evil games with [me]_2959-i and showing [me]_2959-i the worst reality - porn scenario in history . [Jim]_266-jim . . . being touched by [another woman]_{1029-another woman} . Is [she]_{1029-another woman} dressed while [she]_{1029-another woman} massages [him]_266-jim ? Do [they]_1030-they talk ? Do [they]_1030-they laugh like [we]_1030-they do ? [I]_2959-i need to stop this ; it ’s so destructive . [I]_2959-i want [a man who does n’t even exist]_{1031-a man who does n’t even exist} . [The driver]_{739-his driver} opens the front door of [the building]_{361-the building} , and [I]_2959-i watch in slow motion as [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson walks out , navy suit , perfect posture , dark hair . . . emanating power . [Everyone]_109-everyone stops what [they]_1030-they are doing and watches [him]_{739-his driver} get into the back of [the limo]_{678-the limo} . [[His]_{739-his driver} driver]_{739-his driver} shuts the door , and it slowly pulls out and disappears down [the street]_{550-the street} . [I]_2959-i stare back at [my]_2959-i ham - and - cheese toasted sandwich in front of [me]_2959-i , [my]_2959-i dinner . Deflation fills [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i just lost [my]_2959-i appetite . It ’s three o’clock on Friday , and [I]_2959-i stare at the bogus story in front of [me]_2959-i . [Ha]_163-ha . . . what a joke . [I]_2959-i moved all the way to [New York]_{385-new york} to make up fake news for a twat and [[his]_{739-his driver} twat media company]_{1036-his twat media company} . . . and [[his]_{739-his driver} twat brothers]_{1037-his twat brothers} . [I]_2959-i hit the keys on [my]_2959-i computer with force . [Twat]_164-twat , twat . . . fucking twat . So much for [my]_2959-i years of university study . [[My]_2959-i parents]_{1038-my parents} must be so proud . When [they]_{1038-my parents} offered [me]_2959-i the chance to do this , [I]_2959-i thought it was going to be exciting and a chance to prove [my]_2959-i worth . Maybe not ? “ Down the end , ”_{[2326-someone]} [I]_2959-i hear [someone]_2326-someone say . [I]_2959-i glance up to see [a man with a big brown paper bag]_{1040-a man with a big brown paper bag} . “ Uber Eats for [Emily Foster]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i look around , embarrassed . “ [I]_{1040-a man with a big brown paper bag} did n’t order anything . ”_{[1040-a man with a big brown paper bag]} [He]_{1040-a man with a big brown paper bag} reads [the docket]_{1041-the docket} . “ It says here that . . . ”_{[1040-a man with a big brown paper bag]} [He]_{1040-a man with a big brown paper bag} pauses as [he]_{1040-a man with a big brown paper bag} reads and frowns as if confused . “ It says here that this Uber Eats delivery is quality controlled and safe for human consumption . ”_{[1040-a man with a big brown paper bag]} [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_{1040-a man with a big brown paper bag} and take the bag from [his]_{1040-a man with a big brown paper bag} hands . [He]_{1040-a man with a big brown paper bag} squints as [he]_{1040-a man with a big brown paper bag} continues to read the docket . “ This does n’t make sense . . . ”_{[1040-a man with a big brown paper bag]} “ What does n’t ? ”_{[1040-a man with a big brown paper bag]} “ Sugar to sweeten [you]_{1040-a man with a big brown paper bag} up . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i open the bag to find a huge passion fruit cheesecake in its entirety , and [I]_2959-i look up at the camera and smirk . Is [he]_{1040-a man with a big brown paper bag} kidding ? “ Who sent this ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ It says here , [the sender]_{1041-the docket} is a [Mr. Nice Guy]_{165-mr. nice guy} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_{1040-a man with a big brown paper bag} deadpan . “ [Mr. Nice Guy]_{165-mr. nice guy} ? ”_[2959-i] “ Yeah , weird , huh ? ”_[2959-i] “ Thank [you]_{165-mr. nice guy} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i try [my]_2959-i hardest not to smile . [I]_2959-i know [he]_{1040-a man with a big brown paper bag} ’s watching . [Molly]_198-molly and [Aaron]_0-aaron peer into the bag . “ Score , ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron screeches . “ [I]_{1040-a man with a big brown paper bag} ’ll get the plates . ”_{[1040-a man with a big brown paper bag]} [He]_{1040-a man with a big brown paper bag} takes off to [[our]_1042-our staff kitchen]_{1043-our staff kitchen} . “ Thank God for cheesecake , ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly sings in excitement . Okay . . . [he]_{1040-a man with a big brown paper bag} ’s made the first move . What do [I]_2959-i do ? [I]_2959-i take out [my]_2959-i phone and text [him]_{1040-a man with a big brown paper bag} . [Dear Mr. Nice Guy]_{165-mr. nice guy} Thank [you]_{165-mr. nice guy} . Although , [I]_2959-i should have [you]_{165-mr. nice guy} know [I]_2959-i ’m already sweet enough . [I]_2959-i hit send and wait . A reply bounces back . [I]_2959-i have no doubt . Can [I]_2959-i take [you]_{165-mr. nice guy} out to dinner tonight ? [I]_2959-i sit back in [my]_2959-i chair , surprised by [his]_{1040-a man with a big brown paper bag} request . This is a no - win situation . [He]_{1040-a man with a big brown paper bag} wants [a fuck buddy]_{1044-a fuck buddy} to join [his]_{1040-a man with a big brown paper bag} harem , and [I]_2959-i want [him]_{1040-a man with a big brown paper bag} all to [myself]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i write back . [I]_2959-i think [we]_1045-we both said all [we]_1045-we needed to on Sunday morning . God . . . why ca n’t [he]_{1040-a man with a big brown paper bag} just be normal ? A reply bounces back . [I]_2959-i have a proposal for [you]_{165-mr. nice guy} . [I]_2959-i stare at the message but do n’t reply . A proposal ? What , does [he]_{1040-a man with a big brown paper bag} want [me]_2959-i to be [his]_{1040-a man with a big brown paper bag} new masseuse ? [I]_2959-i feel [my]_2959-i anger bubble at the mere thought of [her]_1046-her . Ten minutes later , another text comes in . Hear [me]_2959-i out , please . Please . [He]_{1040-a man with a big brown paper bag} said please . [Ugh]_61-ugh , okay . [I]_2959-i reply . Fine . [I]_2959-i wait . [I]_2959-i ’ll pick [you]_{165-mr. nice guy} up at seven . “ Here [you]_{165-mr. nice guy} go , ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron says as [he]_0-aaron passes [me]_2959-i a plate with the biggest slice of cheesecake [I]_2959-i ’ve ever seen . [He]_0-aaron passes [Molly]_198-molly [hers]_1047-hers and then takes a seat with [his]_0-aaron . “ This is fucking delicious , ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly mumbles with [her]_198-molly mouth full . [Aaron]_0-aaron moans in appreciation . “ Oh [my]_0-aaron fuck , foodgasm . ”_[0-aaron] [I]_2959-i take a bite as [I]_2959-i concentrate hard on not smiling too hard — just in case [he]_0-aaron ’s watching . Well played , [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} . . . well played . Sometimes [you]_1048-you just know in [your]_1048-you gut that [you]_1048-you should n’t be doing something . The outcome is already written in the stars , and sometimes [you]_1048-you should just be stronger and say no . But what if [you]_1048-you ca n’t ? [I]_2959-i ca n’t physically bring [myself]_2959-i not to go tonight . The masochist in [me]_2959-i wants to see [him]_0-aaron . The same masochist wants [him]_0-aaron to take [me]_2959-i and throw [me]_2959-i onto [his]_0-aaron fancy bed and fuck [me]_2959-i till [I]_2959-i forget [my]_2959-i own name . It ’s been a long and lonely week . But [I]_2959-i have to stay strong tonight . If [I]_2959-i cave in now , the last week has been for nothing . And [I]_2959-i still stand by what [I]_2959-i said on Sunday . [I]_2959-i am too good for [him]_0-aaron with the way [he]_0-aaron is at the moment , and [I]_2959-i wo n’t share , and money means nothing to [me]_2959-i at all . [He]_0-aaron needs to step up or step away . The security buzzer sounds , and [my]_2959-i stomach dances in excitement . “ Hello . ”_[2959-i] “ Uber Eats . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i hear [his]_0-aaron velvety voice . [I]_2959-i smile broadly . “ What have [you]_0-aaron got for [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] “ Italian sausage . ”_[2959-i] “ Hmm , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i tease . “ Are [you]_0-aaron going to drug [my]_2959-i sausage and take advantage of [my]_2959-i body after [I]_2959-i fall unconscious ? ”_[2959-i] “ [Undoubtedly]_{166-undoubtedly} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile and push the button to let [him]_0-aaron up , and then [I]_2959-i begin to pace as [I]_2959-i wave [my]_2959-i arms around in the air . Play it cool . . . play it cool . . . play it cool . Knock , knock . [I]_2959-i open the door in a rush , and there [he]_0-aaron stands , gray shirt and black jeans . . . blazing blue eyes . A slow , sexy smile crosses [his]_0-aaron face . “ Hello . ”_[0-aaron] “ Hi , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper as [I]_2959-i stare at the beautiful specimen in front of [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i just want to throw [myself]_2959-i at [him]_0-aaron , the pull to [him]_0-aaron unbearable . [He]_0-aaron leans down and kisses [my]_2959-i cheek as [he]_0-aaron walks past [me]_2959-i into [[my]_2959-i apartment]_{766-my apartment} . “ Are [you]_0-aaron ready ? ”_[0-aaron] [he]_0-aaron asks . “ Uh - huh . ”_[0-aaron] [I]_2959-i grab [my]_2959-i purse and wrap . [His]_0-aaron eyes drop down [my]_2959-i body in [my]_2959-i black dress . “ [You]_0-aaron look lovely . ”_[0-aaron] “ Thanks , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i breathe . “ Let ’s go . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron holds [his]_0-aaron arm out , and [I]_2959-i link [mine]_2959-i with [his]_0-aaron . [We]_1050-we take [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} in awkward silence . [He]_0-aaron is pensive , and [I]_2959-i ’m just nervous as all hell . Playing cool , calm , and collected is terrifying , and [I]_2959-i remind [myself]_2959-i not to drink too much tonight . [We]_1050-we walk out the front of [the building]_{361-the building} , and [the limo]_{678-the limo} is parked at [the curb]_{549-the curb} . [He]_0-aaron opens the door , and [I]_2959-i climb in . Memories of the first time [I]_2959-i was in this back seat accost [me]_2959-i , and the phrase dirty ho rolls around in [my]_2959-i head . [I]_2959-i slide in , and [he]_0-aaron gets in beside [me]_2959-i , and then [he]_0-aaron picks up [my]_2959-i hand and takes it in [his]_0-aaron and rests them on [his]_0-aaron lap . Okay . . . [he]_0-aaron ’s touchy . What does that mean ? [I]_2959-i do n’t know what to say or where this sits in [my]_2959-i playing - hard - to - get act , but the warmth of [his]_0-aaron touch is so comforting that [I]_2959-i let [him]_0-aaron . [The limo]_{678-the limo} drives through [the city]_{2-the city} , and [I]_2959-i stare out the window as a million thoughts run through [my]_2959-i head . Tonight is important ; [we]_1056-we either have to come to some sort of understanding or cut [our]_1056-we losses . [We]_1056-we ca n’t keep fighting over nothing like [we]_1056-we do . [The car]_{369-the car} comes to a stop , and [the driver]_{530-the driver} opens the door . [I]_2959-i climb out , and [Jameson]_186-jameson takes [my]_2959-i hand and leads [me]_2959-i into [a fancy restaurant]_{2612-the restaurant} , [Lucino]_167-lucino ’s . “ Booking for Miles , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson says as [he]_186-jameson holds [my]_2959-i hand tightly in [his]_186-jameson . “ This way , [sir]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [The waiter]_{717-the waiter} smiles as [he]_186-jameson leads [us]_1056-we through [the restaurant]_{2612-the restaurant} to a cozy little table in the corner . [He]_186-jameson pulls out [my]_2959-i chair , and [I]_2959-i take a seat . [Jameson]_186-jameson sits opposite [me]_2959-i ; [the restaurant]_{2612-the restaurant} is dark , with candles flickering on the tables and fairy lights hanging from the ceiling . It ’s very romantic . Do n’t get excited . It ’s probably just a coincidence . “ Can [I]_{717-the waiter} get [you]_{717-the waiter} something to drink ? ”_{[717-the waiter]} [the waiter]_{717-the waiter} asks . “ Yes , [we]_1056-we ’ll have a bottle of S Salon please . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [He]_{717-the waiter} closes the menu and hands it over . [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_{717-the waiter} . Here [we]_1056-we go again . [The waiter]_{717-the waiter} disappears , and [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s big blue eyes come to [mine]_2959-i . [He]_{717-the waiter} takes [my]_2959-i hand over the table again . “ Hello . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [He]_{717-the waiter} smiles softly , as if finally relaxing . [Drop]_168-drop arguing about the drinks . It does n’t fucking matter who orders the drinks . “ Hi . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . [He]_{717-the waiter} dusts [his]_{717-the waiter} thumb over the back of [my]_2959-i knuckles as [his]_{717-the waiter} eyes search [mine]_2959-i . “ How are [you]_2959-i ? ”_{[717-the waiter]} “ Good . ”_{[717-the waiter]} Oh , [his]_{717-the waiter} touch makes [me]_2959-i weak . [I]_2959-i just want to blurt out that [I]_2959-i ’m lying and that [I]_2959-i ’ve had a shit week and [he]_186-jameson ’s [the king of [Twatsville]_{24-twatsville}]_186-jameson . [We]_1061-we stare at each other across the table . It ’s as if [both of [us]_1061-we]_{1062-both of us} do n’t want to speak in case [we]_1061-we break out into all - out war . “ What ’s this proposal , [Jameson]_186-jameson ? ”_{[717-the waiter]} [He]_{717-the waiter} sits back , seemingly annoyed at [my]_2959-i tone . [I]_2959-i grip [his]_{717-the waiter} hand . “ And [I]_2959-i ’m not giving [you]_2959-i attitude . [I]_2959-i just want to know what [you]_2959-i ’re thinking , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say softly . “ Stop being on the defensive with [me]_{717-the waiter} . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [He]_{717-the waiter} relaxes a little , and [the waiter]_{717-the waiter} returns with the bottle of champagne and opens it . [He]_{717-the waiter} pours a little into the champagne flute , and [Jameson]_186-jameson tastes it . “ That ’s fine . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [The waiter]_{717-the waiter} then fills [our]_1061-we glasses and leaves [us]_1061-we alone . “ [I]_{717-the waiter} ’ve been thinking about what [you]_2959-i said last weekend . ”_{[717-the waiter]} “ And ? ”_{[717-the waiter]} [He]_{717-the waiter} sips [his]_{717-the waiter} drink . “ [I]_2959-i canceled [my]_2959-i massages this week . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smirk as [my]_2959-i eyes hold [his]_{717-the waiter} ; [I]_2959-i stay silent . “ The thing is with [me]_{717-the waiter} . . . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [His]_{717-the waiter} voice trails off . [I]_2959-i wait for [him]_{717-the waiter} to speak , and when [he]_{717-the waiter} does n’t , [I]_2959-i squeeze [his]_{717-the waiter} hand in [mine]_2959-i for reassurance . “ [I]_2959-i ’m married to [my]_2959-i job , [Em]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ When [I]_{717-the waiter} said [I]_{717-the waiter} was n’t looking for a relationship , [I]_{717-the waiter} did n’t mean . . . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [He]_{717-the waiter} shrugs as if lost for words . “ [You]_2959-i did n’t mean what ? ”_{[717-the waiter]} “ [I]_{717-the waiter} did n’t mean that [I]_{717-the waiter} do n’t want to see [you]_2959-i . [I]_{717-the waiter} meant that [I]_{717-the waiter} am a workaholic , and [I]_{717-the waiter} know [that very few women]_{2765-that very few women} can deal with how much [I]_{717-the waiter} work . ”_{[717-the waiter]} “ [Jameson]_186-jameson , [I]_{717-the waiter} do n’t care about how hard [you]_2959-i work . [I]_{717-the waiter} just do n’t want to be one of many . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [He]_{717-the waiter} frowns . “ Meaning what ? ”_{[717-the waiter]} “ [I]_{717-the waiter} ’m not wired for one - night stands , [Jameson]_186-jameson . It ’s not who [I]_{717-the waiter} am . But [I]_{717-the waiter} ’m not looking for a deep and meaningful relationship either . [You]_2959-i ’ve misunderstood [me]_{717-the waiter} . ”_{[717-the waiter]} “ What do [you]_2959-i want , then ? ”_{[717-the waiter]} “ [I]_{717-the waiter} want to have a friendship with [a man]_{2300-a man} and know [I]_{717-the waiter} ’m [the only person [he]_{2300-a man} ’s sleeping with]_{717-the waiter} . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [He]_{717-the waiter} listens . “ And [I]_{717-the waiter} most definitely do n’t want to share [you]_2959-i with [a fucking masseuse]_{2767-a fucking masseuse} . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [He]_{717-the waiter} rolls [his]_{717-the waiter} eyes . “ And [I]_{717-the waiter} do n’t want [you]_2959-i to roll [your]_2959-i fucking eyes at [me]_{717-the waiter} . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [He]_{717-the waiter} clenches [his]_{717-the waiter} jaw , unimpressed . “ Watch [your]_2959-i tone , ”_{[717-the waiter]} [he]_{717-the waiter} warns . “ See that ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say . “ What ? ”_[2959-i] “ This defensive shit . It has to stop between [us]_2768-we . [We]_2768-we ca n’t keep fighting over every little thing like [we]_2768-we do . ”_{[717-the waiter]} “ [You]_2959-i ’re just as bad , ”_{[717-the waiter]} [he]_{717-the waiter} fires back . “ [I]_{717-the waiter} know , and [I]_{717-the waiter} ’m trying to stop it . Just now [I]_{717-the waiter} held [my]_{717-the waiter} tongue because [you]_2959-i ordered [my]_{717-the waiter} drink without asking what [I]_{717-the waiter} wanted . ”_{[717-the waiter]} “ [I]_{717-the waiter} ’m used to being in control , [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_{[717-the waiter]} [he]_{717-the waiter} snaps . “ So am [I.]_{717-the waiter} That wo n’t change . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [His]_{717-the waiter} eyes search [mine]_2959-i , and [he]_{717-the waiter} rearranges the napkin on [his]_{717-the waiter} lap as if [he]_{717-the waiter} ’s thinking . “ [I]_2959-i ’m not asking [you]_2959-i to be [[my]_2959-i boyfriend]_{2490-my boyfriend} , [Jameson]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ That ’s not what this is about . [We]_2770-we have a great sexual connection , and [I]_2959-i want it . [I]_2959-i feel like [I]_2959-i have to have it . . . but [I]_2959-i ca n’t , not if [I]_2959-i know [you]_2959-i have it with [other women]_{1002-other women} . [I]_2959-i need to be [the only one]_{2772-the only one} . ”_[2959-i] “ Fine , [I]_{717-the waiter} wo n’t sleep with [anyone else]_{527-anyone else} , ”_{[717-the waiter]} [he]_{717-the waiter} snaps in exasperation . “ And ? ”_{[717-the waiter]} [I]_2959-i ask . [He]_{717-the waiter} rolls [his]_{717-the waiter} eyes . “ And [you]_2959-i can order the fucking drinks . ”_{[717-the waiter]} Chapter 12 [I]_2959-i giggle . “ This is n’t about the stupid drinks , [Jameson]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] “ What is it about , then , for [Christ]_169-christ ’s sake ? Speak English . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i want [you]_2959-i to drop being defensive with [me]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i ’m not . ”_[2959-i] “ Yes , [you]_2959-i are , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper as [I]_2959-i hold [his]_{717-the waiter} hand in [mine]_2959-i . “ So are [you]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_{717-the waiter} know [I]_{717-the waiter} am , because [I]_{717-the waiter} feel like [you]_2959-i will walk all over [me]_{717-the waiter} if [I]_{717-the waiter} ’m not . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [His]_{717-the waiter} brow furrows . “ [I]_{717-the waiter} would never walk all over [you]_2959-i . ”_{[717-the waiter]} “ Not purposely . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [He]_{717-the waiter} clenches [his]_{717-the waiter} jaw , and [I]_2959-i know that ’s exactly how it is . “ [I]_{717-the waiter} just want [the guy [I]_{717-the waiter} met on [the plane]_{268-the plane}]_{2774-that guy} . [The one who let [himself]_{717-the waiter} go]_{2776-the one who let himself go} . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [His]_{717-the waiter} eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ [I]_{717-the waiter} do n’t know how to be [that guy]_{2774-that guy} all the time , [Em]_186-jameson . It ’s a very small part of [my]_{717-the waiter} personality . ”_{[717-the waiter]} “ Then just save that small part for [me]_2959-i , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i breathe . A soft smile crosses [his]_{717-the waiter} face as [he]_{717-the waiter} watches [me]_2959-i , and [he]_{717-the waiter} sips [his]_{717-the waiter} drink . “ What was so good about [that guy on [the plane]_{268-the plane}]_{2774-that guy} , anyway ? ”_{[717-the waiter]} “ [He]_{717-the waiter} made [me]_2959-i laugh . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile as [I]_2959-i remember . “ And [he]_{717-the waiter} gave [me]_2959-i the best sex of [my]_2959-i life . ”_[2959-i] “ Of [your]_2959-i entire life ? ”_{[717-the waiter]} “ Uh - huh . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [He]_{717-the waiter} smiles , pleased with [himself]_{717-the waiter} . “ So do [we]_2778-we have a deal ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ Let [me]_2959-i get this straight — [you]_2959-i want to have [friends]_394-friends with benefits but only with each other ? ”_[2959-i] “ Yes . ”_{[717-the waiter]} “ What happens when [I]_{717-the waiter} ’m at work all the time or away and [you]_2959-i ’re out and . . . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [His]_{717-the waiter} voice trails off . “ Then [I]_{717-the waiter} ’ll call [you]_2959-i and tell [you]_2959-i [I]_{717-the waiter} need [you]_2959-i . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [His]_{717-the waiter} eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ And [you]_2959-i ’ll talk [me]_{717-the waiter} through it over the phone , or [I]_{717-the waiter} ’ll wait till [you]_2959-i come [home]_2289-home . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [He]_{717-the waiter} rubs [his]_{717-the waiter} thumbnail over [his]_{717-the waiter} bottom lip as [he]_{717-the waiter} listens , as if fascinated . “ [I]_{717-the waiter} do n’t want to have sex with [anyone else]_{527-anyone else} , [Jameson]_186-jameson . [I]_{717-the waiter} ’m [not that kind of girl]_{316-not that kind of girl} . [You]_2959-i are the only one - night stand [I]_{717-the waiter} ’ve ever had . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [He]_{717-the waiter} squeezes [my]_2959-i hand , pleased with that answer . “ [I]_{717-the waiter} ’ve had sex with [four people in [my]_{717-the waiter} whole life]_{2783-four people in my whole life} , and [you]_2959-i ’re [one of [them]_{2783-four people in my whole life}]_{2784-one of them} . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [He]_{717-the waiter} leans onto [his]_{717-the waiter} hand and smiles dreamily at [me]_2959-i . “ What ? ”_{[717-the waiter]} “ Do [you]_2959-i know how often [I]_2959-i think about fucking [you]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i giggle , surprised by that statement . “ How often ? ”_[2959-i] “ All the time . [I]_{717-the waiter} ’m like [a starstruck eighteen - year - old]_{2785-a starstruck eighteen - year - old} . ”_{[717-the waiter]} “ [You]_2959-i would n’t know it . ”_{[717-the waiter]} “ Why ? ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_2959-i acted like [you]_2959-i hated [me]_{717-the waiter} all week . [You]_2959-i can be so cold when [you]_2959-i want to be . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [He]_{717-the waiter} sits up in [his]_{717-the waiter} chair and straightens [his]_{717-the waiter} back . “ [I]_{717-the waiter} do n’t like to be challenged for the sake of it , [Emily]_186-jameson . [You]_2959-i fought with [me]_{717-the waiter} last weekend just to prove a point . It angered [me]_{717-the waiter} . ”_{[717-the waiter]} “ No . [I]_1064-he fought with [you]_2959-i last weekend because [I]_1064-he wanted to spend the day at [[my]_1064-he apartment]_{2751-your fancy apartment} , and [you]_2959-i just assumed that [your]_2959-i place was better than [mine]_1064-he . [Your]_2959-i money does n’t impress [me]_1064-he , [Jameson]_186-jameson . [I]_1064-he do n’t care for [[your]_2959-i fancy apartment]_{2751-your fancy apartment} . [Mine]_1064-he is just as good . ”_[1064-he] [He]_1064-he rolls [his]_1064-he eyes . “ Are [we]_2787-we going to fight now about why [we]_2787-we fought ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . [He]_1064-he ’s right ; this is ridiculous . “ No . No more fighting . ”_[1064-he] [I]_2959-i pick up [his]_1064-he hand and cup it around [my]_2959-i face . “ [We]_2787-we ’re going to have dinner , and then [we]_2787-we ’re going to go back to [[your]_2959-i place]_{2751-your fancy apartment} , and then [I]_2959-i ’m going to ride [your]_2959-i cock . . . just the way [you]_2959-i like it , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [He]_1064-he inhales sharply as [his]_1064-he eyes flicker with excitement . “ [You]_2959-i fucking turn [me]_1064-he on . ”_[1064-he] [I]_2959-i put [my]_2959-i thumb into [my]_2959-i mouth and suck it in slow motion , [our]_1065-our eyes locked . “ As [your]_2959-i dedicated fuck bunny , [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} , [I]_2959-i take [my]_2959-i job very seriously , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper darkly . “ [Your]_2959-i wish is [my]_1064-he command , [sir]_2959-i . ”_[1064-he] [He]_1064-he gives [me]_2959-i a slow , sexy smile . “ Now [you]_2959-i ’re talking . ”_[1064-he] Two hours later [Lathered]_170-lathered with a sheen of perspiration , [I]_2959-i rock forward onto [his]_1064-he cock . [Jameson]_186-jameson is sitting with [his]_186-jameson back against [his]_186-jameson headboard . One hand is on [my]_2959-i hip , the other cupping [my]_2959-i breast . [He]_186-jameson ’s so big that [I]_2959-i can feel every inch of [him]_186-jameson deep inside [my]_2959-i body . [He]_186-jameson took [me]_2959-i hard and fast the first time , [me]_2959-i on [my]_2959-i knees and [him]_186-jameson behind [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i watched [us]_1066-us in the mirror . Every muscle in [his]_186-jameson torso contracted as [he]_186-jameson pumped [me]_2959-i , and [his]_186-jameson dark eyes held [mine]_2959-i . It was the hottest thing [I]_2959-i ’ve ever seen . [His]_186-jameson hand has a strong grip on [my]_2959-i hip bone as [he]_186-jameson rocks [me]_2959-i back and forward with force . [Our]_1066-us eyes are locked , and this is one of those moments where neither of [us]_1066-us speaks — it ’s perfect without words . [He]_186-jameson grabs a handful of [my]_2959-i hair and drags [me]_2959-i down to [him]_186-jameson ; [his]_186-jameson lips take [mine]_2959-i , and [we]_1066-us kiss . [His]_186-jameson tongue is sliding into [my]_2959-i mouth at just the right angle . “ Legs up , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson whispers as [he]_186-jameson lifts [my]_2959-i knees to a squatting position . [My]_2959-i face falters . “ What ? ”_[2959-i] “ Be careful . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [I]_186-jameson wo n’t hurt [you]_186-jameson — [you]_186-jameson know that . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson kisses [me]_2959-i again with just the right amount of suction ; [my]_2959-i body knows who ’s in control here . [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson may have given [me]_2959-i control of drink ordering , but it ’s glaringly obvious [he]_186-jameson will never give [me]_2959-i control in [the bedroom]_{758-the bedroom} . Not that [I]_2959-i want [him]_186-jameson to ; what [he]_186-jameson does is sheer perfection . [He]_186-jameson begins to lift [me]_2959-i , slowly and carefully at first , and [we]_1068-we go at a controlled speed . [He]_186-jameson looks up at [me]_2959-i in awe . “ Oh , ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i moan . “ So . . . good , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whimper . [His]_186-jameson eyes roll back in [his]_186-jameson head as [he]_186-jameson lifts [me]_2959-i higher and slams [me]_2959-i down harder . [My]_2959-i hands are on [his]_186-jameson broad shoulders , and [I]_2959-i feel the muscles contract beneath [me]_2959-i . [He]_186-jameson begins to moan as [he]_186-jameson slams [me]_2959-i onto [his]_186-jameson body , the look on [his]_186-jameson face one of sheer ecstasy . [I]_2959-i tip [my]_2959-i head back as a freight train of an orgasm comes shuddering deep within [me]_2959-i . “ Oh fuck , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson cries out as [he]_186-jameson holds [himself]_186-jameson deep inside [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i feel the telling jerk as [his]_186-jameson body empties itself in [mine]_2959-i . [His]_186-jameson eyes search [mine]_2959-i , and in slow motion , [he]_186-jameson reaches up and cups [my]_2959-i face and brings [my]_2959-i lips down to [his]_186-jameson . [We]_1069-we kiss , and it ’s slow , tender , and intimate — nothing like the detached version [we]_1069-we talked about . [He]_186-jameson ’s right here with [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i know [he]_186-jameson is . “ [You]_186-jameson are so fucking beautiful , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson murmurs against [my]_2959-i lips as [he]_186-jameson pulls [me]_2959-i close . [I]_2959-i lie down on [his]_186-jameson chest and smile against [his]_186-jameson skin as [his]_186-jameson arms wrap around [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i can feel [his]_186-jameson heart beating hard against [mine]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i feel so safe and cherished . [I]_2959-i know this is supposed to be [friends]_394-friends with benefits . But it ’s not . . . it ’s more . What kind of more [I]_2959-i just do n’t know . [I]_2959-i feel a hand on [my]_2959-i behind , and it gives [me]_2959-i a sturdy pat . “ Come on . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i screw up [my]_2959-i face and roll toward [him]_186-jameson . “ What ? ”_[2959-i] “ Up [you]_186-jameson get . ”_[2959-i] “ Huh ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stretch and open [my]_2959-i eyes . The drapes are pulled , and sunshine is beaming through the huge windows . [I]_2959-i look around , half - asleep . “ What time is it ? ”_[2959-i] “ It ’s eight . Get up . [We]_2788-we ’re going for a run around [Central Park]_{17-central park} . ”_[2959-i] “ Who is ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . [He]_186-jameson ’s in a towel and freshly showered . “ [Me]_186-jameson and [you]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i scratch [my]_2959-i head in confusion . “ [You]_186-jameson had a shower to go for a run ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_186-jameson smelled like sex . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson smirks as [he]_186-jameson leans down and kisses [me]_2959-i on the lips . [I]_2959-i wrap [my]_2959-i arms around [him]_186-jameson and hold [him]_186-jameson down . [He]_186-jameson pulls from [my]_2959-i grip . “ Come on . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [I]_186-jameson have no stuff here . What shoes would [I]_186-jameson wear ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ What size are [you]_186-jameson ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Eight . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Hmm . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson puts [his]_186-jameson hands on [his]_186-jameson hips and thinks . “ Well , [you]_186-jameson can wear some of [mine]_2959-i . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [I]_186-jameson ’ll fall over and break [my]_186-jameson neck , [Jameson]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Hmm , okay . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson disappears into [the walk - in closet]_{1071-the walk - in closet} and comes out in black Nike shorts and a blue Nike T - shirt . [I]_2959-i smirk when [I]_2959-i see [him]_186-jameson . “ What ? ”_[2959-i] “ Are [you]_186-jameson sponsored by [Nike]_171-nike today or something ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson looks down at [himself]_186-jameson and smiles . “ No , it just happens to be comfortable . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Like this bed . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile sleepily as [I]_2959-i snuggle back under the covers . [He]_186-jameson sits down to put [his]_186-jameson shoes on , and [I]_2959-i watch [him]_186-jameson for a moment . “ So how does this work ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ How does what work ? ”_[2959-i] “ Well . . . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pause as [I]_2959-i try to articulate what [I]_2959-i want to say without sounding needy . “ [I]_2959-i ’ve never done this casual thing before . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug shyly . “ How do [we]_2789-we navigate this ? When do [we]_2789-we see each other ? ”_[2959-i] “ Well . . . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson bends to tie [his]_186-jameson shoe . “ [We]_2789-we just play it by ear , [I]_2959-i guess . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . But what if [he]_186-jameson did n’t call ? [I]_2959-i ’d be waiting all week . Oh , [I]_2959-i do n’t like the sound of that . “ [I]_186-jameson think [I]_186-jameson would prefer set days . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson frowns . “ How many days ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug . Shit , did that sound clingy ? [I]_2959-i ’ll play it down . “ One day a week . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_186-jameson want to see [you]_186-jameson more than once a week , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson scoffs . “ [You]_186-jameson do ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson smiles , knowing exactly what [I]_2959-i ’m doing . [He]_186-jameson stands and then leans down and kisses [me]_2959-i . “ Yes , three times a week . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i try to hide [my]_2959-i smile . “ What days ? ”_[2959-i] “ Do [we]_2790-we have to have set days ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [I]_2959-i kind of do . ”_[2959-i] “ Why ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug as [I]_2959-i twist the blanket between [my]_2959-i fingers , embarrassed by [my]_2959-i neediness . [He]_186-jameson puts [his]_186-jameson finger under [my]_2959-i chin and brings [my]_2959-i face to [his]_186-jameson . “ Why , [Emily]_186-jameson ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Because [I]_186-jameson hate waiting around , and then [we]_2790-we know not to plan anything else on [our]_2790-we days . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Okay . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson puts [his]_186-jameson hands on [his]_186-jameson hips . “ When do [you]_186-jameson want to see [me]_186-jameson ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Maybe twice through the week and once on weekends . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i hesitate as [I]_2959-i watch for [his]_186-jameson cues . “ But only a few hours each time , of course . ”_[2959-i] “ No . ”_{[186-jameson]} Shit . [I]_2959-i ’m going too far with [my]_2959-i demands [here]_{385-new york} . “ Two full nights through the week and one full night and half a day on the weekend . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . “ Half a day . ”_[2959-i] “ Yes , starting today . [I]_2959-i want [my]_2959-i half day this morning . ”_[2959-i] “ Today ? Why today ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i ’m going to go for a run while [you]_186-jameson go back to sleep . Then [I]_2959-i ’m coming [home]_2289-home , and [we]_2792-we are going to shower , and then [I]_2959-i ’m making [you]_186-jameson breakfast . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile softly . That sounds really good . “ And then [we]_2792-we ’re going to come back to bed , and [I]_186-jameson ’m going to fuck [you]_186-jameson stupid again to get [me]_186-jameson through another few days without [you]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson cups [my]_2959-i face in [his]_186-jameson hand . “ Okay ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson asks . [He]_186-jameson ’s really quite swoony when [he]_186-jameson ’s being nice . [I]_2959-i nod as [I]_2959-i try to control [my]_2959-i goofy smile . [He]_186-jameson closes the drapes and then lays [me]_2959-i back down and tucks [me]_2959-i in and kisses [me]_2959-i softly on [my]_2959-i temple . “ Go back to sleep , [sweetheart]_2959-i , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson whispers . [I]_2959-i close [my]_2959-i eyes and smile into [my]_2959-i pillow , and [I]_2959-i hear [him]_186-jameson leave [the apartment]_{300-the bathroom} . [I]_2959-i roll onto [my]_2959-i back and look up at the fancy ceiling . [The man]_186-jameson ’s [a god]_{341-a god} . [I]_2959-i doze for the next hour and wake as [Jameson]_186-jameson walks into [the bedroom]_{300-the bathroom} . [He]_186-jameson ’s wet with perspiration and breathing heavily , and [I]_2959-i sit up on [my]_2959-i elbows as [I]_2959-i watch [him]_186-jameson . “ Where the hell did [you]_186-jameson run to , [Antarctica]_{172-antarctica} ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson chuckles and shakes [his]_186-jameson head , still out of breath . “ [You]_186-jameson must really run hard , huh ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson nods as [he]_186-jameson puts [his]_186-jameson hands on [his]_186-jameson hips . “ The harder [I]_186-jameson run , the better the effects . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Effects on what ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ [My]_186-jameson stress levels . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson disappears into [the bathroom]_{300-the bathroom} and turns the shower on . Oh , this is news . [He]_186-jameson has stress issues ? Well , [I]_2959-i guess [he]_186-jameson would . [His]_186-jameson workload is huge , after all . “ Are [you]_2959-i getting in ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson calls . “ Yes , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i call as [I]_2959-i amble in . [He]_186-jameson ’s in the shower , and the water is running over [his]_186-jameson head . [His]_186-jameson breathing is slowly returning to normal . [I]_2959-i get in , and [he]_186-jameson wraps [me]_2959-i in [his]_186-jameson arms and kisses [me]_2959-i softly . “ Good morning , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ Good morning , [my]_186-jameson Em . ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson lips dust [mine]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i smile goofily up at [him]_186-jameson . “ What ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i like it when [you]_2959-i call [me]_2959-i that . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_2959-i do ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson smiles . “ [[Your]_2959-i princess]_2959-i Em . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i bat [my]_2959-i eyelashes to prove [my]_2959-i point . [He]_186-jameson chuckles as [he]_186-jameson picks up the soap and begins to wash [me]_2959-i . “ [I]_186-jameson have no doubt that underneath all that snarky [Ms. Foster]_{126-ms. foster} act is [a pure sweetheart]_2959-i . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [I]_2959-i have n’t been snarky once , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i gasp . [He]_186-jameson smiles down at [me]_2959-i as [he]_186-jameson tucks a piece of hair behind [my]_2959-i ear . “ And look how beautiful [you]_2793-you are . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i giggle and lean against [his]_186-jameson chest . [He]_186-jameson washes [my]_2959-i back , [my]_2959-i shoulders , [my]_2959-i breasts , and then down [my]_2959-i legs . [I]_2959-i watch [him]_186-jameson as [he]_186-jameson concentrates on [his]_186-jameson task . Then [he]_186-jameson moves down to [my]_2959-i sex , and [his]_186-jameson eyes come to [mine]_2959-i while [he]_186-jameson touches [me]_2959-i there . [Our]_1075-our eyes are locked , but this does n’t feel sexual . It feels intimate . [I]_2959-i stare into [his]_186-jameson big blue eyes , and [I]_2959-i swear this is n’t [the same man who runs [Miles Media]_{14-miles media}]_56-robbie . [The man with [me]_2959-i]_56-robbie now is sweet and tender . Everything [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson is not . “ Let [me]_186-jameson wash [you]_56-robbie . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i take the soap from [him]_56-robbie and lather [my]_2959-i hands together and roam them over [his]_56-robbie broad chest and muscular shoulders and biceps , then down [his]_56-robbie rippled abs to [his]_56-robbie groin , and [I]_2959-i clench [my]_2959-i insides while [I]_2959-i wash [him]_56-robbie there . [He]_56-robbie leans down and kisses [my]_2959-i temple softly , as if knowing [I]_2959-i ’m holding [myself]_2959-i back from pouncing on [him]_56-robbie . [We]_1077-we need to stop having sex all the time ; it ’s getting ridiculous . The sexual attraction is so strong that [neither of [us]_1077-we]_{757-neither of us} can get [our]_1077-we fill of each other . “ [You]_2794-you ’ve turned [me]_2959-i into a complete sex maniac , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [He]_56-robbie smiles down at [me]_2959-i as [his]_56-robbie lips dust [mine]_2959-i . “ [I]_56-robbie think [you]_2794-you already suffered that affliction before [we]_1077-we met — if [our]_1077-we first night was anything to go by . ”_[56-robbie] “ [I]_56-robbie ’ve never been like this before . ”_[56-robbie] “ Like what ? ”_[56-robbie] “ [You]_2794-you bring something out in [me]_2959-i that [no other man]_{2795-no other man} has . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes search [his]_56-robbie . “ [You]_2794-you ’re different from anyone [I]_2959-i ’ve ever been with . ”_[2959-i] [The water]_{1079-the water} falls over [us]_1080-we , and [I]_2959-i do n’t know why [I]_2959-i just told [him]_56-robbie that . [I]_2959-i can feel [myself]_2959-i getting attached , and [I]_2959-i do n’t know how to stop blurting things out . [I]_2959-i ’m going to ruin everything . Stop talking , [fool]_306-fool . [He]_56-robbie takes [my]_2959-i face in [his]_56-robbie hands and kisses [me]_2959-i . [His]_56-robbie tongue swipes through [my]_2959-i open mouth , and it ’s deep , erotic , tender , and goddamn . . . so fucking perfect that [I]_2959-i ca n’t even deal . “ [I]_56-robbie ’m taking [you]_56-robbie back to bed , ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie murmurs darkly . “ Please , ”_[56-robbie] [I]_2959-i whimper . [We]_1080-we get out , and [he]_56-robbie dries [us]_1080-we both and then leads [me]_2959-i back to bed and lays [me]_2959-i down and spreads [my]_2959-i legs open . [I]_2959-i watch as [he]_56-robbie rolls a condom on and lies down on top of [me]_2959-i . [We]_1080-we stare at each other as [he]_56-robbie holds [himself]_56-robbie up on [his]_56-robbie elbows , and [his]_56-robbie body finds that place between [my]_2959-i legs . [I]_2959-i grab [his]_56-robbie behind , but [he]_56-robbie stops [me]_2959-i from pulling [him]_56-robbie in . “ [I]_56-robbie want it slow , ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie breathes . Oh God , [my]_2959-i insides begin to ripple in excitement . “ [I]_56-robbie want [you]_56-robbie . ”_[56-robbie] [His]_56-robbie lips take [mine]_2959-i , and [our]_1080-we kiss becomes frantic as [his]_56-robbie body slides in slow and deep . [My]_2959-i back arches off the bed in pleasure at [his]_56-robbie possession . [I]_2959-i moan loudly , and [his]_56-robbie eyes roll back in pleasure . For twenty minutes , [we]_1080-we slowly appreciate [each other]_{2339-each other} ’s bodies ; [he]_56-robbie ’s gentle and loving and so , so deep inside [me]_2959-i . [His]_56-robbie open mouth roams from [my]_2959-i collarbone , up [my]_2959-i neck , and across [my]_2959-i jaw to [my]_2959-i lips . “ Fuck , [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie whispers . “ [You]_186-jameson turn [me]_56-robbie inside out , [baby]_186-jameson . ”_[56-robbie] If [I]_2959-i could reply , [I]_2959-i would , but [I]_2959-i ’m too busy in making - love heaven here . Being fucked hard by [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson is hot as hell , but being made love to by [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson is life changing . [I]_2959-i ’ll never be the same . Where the hell does [a girl]_{387-a girl} go after sex like this ? It builds inside [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i begin to quiver , but instead of getting harder like [he]_56-robbie normally does , [he]_56-robbie stops still . “ Take it , ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie whispers . “ What ? ”_[56-robbie] “ Stay still , and take it from [me]_2959-i . Clench [your]_56-robbie orgasm in . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes search [his]_56-robbie . [Holy mother]_{1084-holy mother} fuck . [I]_2959-i ca n’t deal with how hot [this man]_56-robbie is . “ Fuck [me]_56-robbie , ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie whispers . “ Do n’t move a muscle , except for here . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie flexes [his]_56-robbie dick , and [I]_2959-i feel it deep inside . “ [I]_56-robbie want [you]_56-robbie to show [me]_56-robbie , just [me]_56-robbie . . . how [you]_56-robbie feel . ”_[56-robbie] “ Oh God , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i moan . “ Come on , ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie coaches . [I]_2959-i clench , and [he]_56-robbie smiles darkly . “ Harder . ”_[56-robbie] [I]_2959-i clench again , and [his]_56-robbie lip curls in excitement . “ That ’s it , [baby]_336-yay . ”_[2959-i] [His]_56-robbie eyes close in ecstasy . “ Milk [me]_56-robbie , and show [me]_56-robbie who it belongs to . ”_[56-robbie] Something snaps inside [me]_2959-i when [I]_2959-i hear [him]_56-robbie say that [his]_56-robbie cock belongs to [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i bring [my]_2959-i legs up and wrap them around [his]_56-robbie waist and begin to clench in a rhythm . [He]_56-robbie hisses in approval . “ So . . . good , ”_[56-robbie] [I]_2959-i whisper as [we]_1085-we stare at each other . “ So . . . fucking good . ”_[2959-i] To the outside world it would look like [we]_1085-we are just cuddling as [we]_1085-we lie perfectly still , but inside , every wall [I]_2959-i ’ve ever built up is being demolished , clench by clench . [He]_56-robbie begins to moan , and it sounds too good — [I]_2959-i ca n’t hold it . [I]_2959-i clench as hard as [I]_2959-i can , and [we]_1085-we both cry out as an orgasm tears between [us]_1085-we . And then [he]_56-robbie kisses [me]_2959-i , and it ’s sweet and tender , and [I]_2959-i feel emotion run between [us]_1085-we . [I]_2959-i hold [him]_56-robbie close , cheek to cheek , as [I]_2959-i hang on to [him]_56-robbie for dear life . “ [You]_56-robbie ’re so fucking perfect , [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie whispers . [I]_2959-i run [my]_2959-i fingers through [his]_56-robbie stubble . “ It ’s [you]_56-robbie who ’s perfect . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i kiss [him]_56-robbie softly . “ [You]_56-robbie should stop it immediately . ”_[2959-i] “ Why is that ? ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie smiles . “ [I]_56-robbie think [I]_56-robbie may be addicted . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie chuckles and rolls onto [his]_56-robbie back and pulls [me]_2959-i over [him]_56-robbie . “ No , [I]_2959-i want [you]_2959-i addicted . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i laugh . “ Why would [you]_2959-i want [me]_2959-i addicted ? ”_[2959-i] “ Because [I]_56-robbie am , and [I]_56-robbie do n’t want to be in this alone . ”_[56-robbie] [His]_56-robbie eyes search [mine]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i feel [my]_2959-i heart free - fall from [my]_2959-i chest . “ [You]_2959-i ’re not in this alone , [Jay]_108-jay . ”_[2959-i] “ Good . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie kisses [my]_2959-i temple as [he]_56-robbie seems to relax . [We]_1086-we lie together in a tangled mess , and [he]_56-robbie dozes back to sleep . [My]_2959-i mind begins to go into overdrive . [I]_2959-i have feelings for [him]_56-robbie — [I]_2959-i know [I]_2959-i do . In just two days , [I]_2959-i ’ve developed feelings for [him]_56-robbie . How is this going to end ? [I]_2959-i ’m totally screwed . An hour later , [I]_2959-i wake to the smell of bacon cooking , and [I]_2959-i smile up at the ceiling . [I]_2959-i do n’t know what this alternate universe is , but [I]_2959-i like it . [I]_2959-i throw on a robe [I]_2959-i found hanging in [the bathroom]_{300-the bathroom} and make [my]_2959-i way out into [the living area]_{765-the living area} . [I]_2959-i turn the corner and see a glass wall with a view over [New York]_{385-new york} and [Central Park]_{17-central park} . Over - the - top wealth and luxury hit [me]_2959-i in the face , and [I]_2959-i stop still on the spot . [I]_2959-i ca n’t get [my]_2959-i head around the fact that this is all [his]_56-robbie . This money is [his]_56-robbie money . [My]_2959-i eyes roam over the beautiful floors , gorgeous rugs and furnishings , then to the fireplace and up to the huge gilded mirror above [it]_1089-it . [I]_2959-i ’ve never even seen [an apartment]_{2312-an apartment} like this in a magazine , let alone been in one . [I]_2959-i feel so out of place . “ Hey , there [you]_{2797-the first woman who ’s ever had a problem with my money} are . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie smiles as [he]_56-robbie comes around the corner and sees [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i give [him]_56-robbie a lopsided smile . [He]_56-robbie frowns as [he]_56-robbie sees [my]_2959-i face . “ What ’s wrong ? ”_[56-robbie] [I]_2959-i twist [my]_2959-i hands in front of [me]_2959-i nervously . “ [[Your]_{2797-the first woman who ’s ever had a problem with my money} apartment]_{2745-your apartment} freaks [me]_2959-i out . ”_[2959-i] “ Why ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug , embarrassed by [my]_2959-i slummy standards . “ It ’s so fancy . [I]_56-robbie feel like [I]_56-robbie do n’t belong here . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie takes [me]_2959-i in [his]_56-robbie arms . “ What does that mean ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug . “ Is that why [you]_{2797-the first woman who ’s ever had a problem with my money} did n’t want to come here last weekend ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i nod . “ Yes . ”_[2959-i] “ Explain to [me]_2959-i why ? ”_[2959-i] “ When [I]_2959-i ’m here , [I]_2959-i ’m reminded of how much [we]_2799-we do n’t have in common . ”_[2959-i] “ And that bothers [you]_{2797-the first woman who ’s ever had a problem with my money} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i nod shyly . [He]_56-robbie frowns , as if trying to understand . “ [You]_{2797-the first woman who ’s ever had a problem with my money} ’re [the first woman who ’s ever had a problem with [my]_56-robbie money]_{2797-the first woman who ’s ever had a problem with my money} . ”_[56-robbie] “ It ’s a turnoff to [me]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] “ [Turnoff]_173-turnoff ? ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie splutters . “ [I]_2959-i would prefer [you]_{2797-the first woman who ’s ever had a problem with my money} to be poor , actually . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile , knowing how ridiculous that sounds . [He]_56-robbie chuckles . “ Well , that makes [one of [us]_2801-us]_{2800-one of us} . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie leads [me]_2959-i into [the kitchen]_{683-the kitchen} , and [I]_2959-i see a breakfast of bacon and eggs on sourdough bread with a side of avocado . “ [Yum]_174-yum . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile as [I]_2959-i take a seat . “ [I]_56-robbie ’ll have [you]_174-yum know that [I]_56-robbie ’m [an excellent breakfast chef]_56-robbie . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie sits down beside [me]_2959-i , looking very pleased with [himself]_56-robbie . [My]_2959-i smile fades , and [I]_2959-i pick up [my]_2959-i knife and fork . That ’s because [he]_56-robbie cooks so many breakfasts . Stop it . [I]_2959-i take [my]_2959-i first mouthful . [I]_2959-i wonder how [many women]_{1092-many women} have sat here just like this and eaten [his]_56-robbie cooking after having amazing sex all night . For [Christ]_169-christ ’s sake , stop it . “ What are [you]_174-yum doing today ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask to take [my]_2959-i mind off [my]_2959-i negative thoughts . “ Playing golf with [[my]_56-robbie brothers]_{1038-my parents} this afternoon , and then [I]_56-robbie ’ll probably have dinner with [them]_{1092-many women} and [[my]_56-robbie parents]_{1038-my parents} . [They]_{1092-many women} go back to [London]_6-london this week sometime . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie sips [his]_56-robbie coffee . “ [You]_56-robbie ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile as [I]_2959-i imagine the four of [them]_{1092-many women} playing golf . “ [I]_56-robbie have to [food shop]_{2803-food shop} . [I]_56-robbie ’ll go for a walk and then write some bogus news stories . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie stops eating . “ [You]_56-robbie do n’t have to work on the weekend , [you]_56-robbie know . ”_[56-robbie] “ [I]_56-robbie know . [I]_56-robbie just like to be ahead of schedule in case something comes up . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie nods and goes back to [his]_56-robbie breakfast . “ Are [you]_56-robbie going out tonight ? ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie asks casually . [I]_2959-i ’m not , but [I]_2959-i do n’t want [him]_56-robbie to think [I]_2959-i ’m at [home]_2289-home pining over [him]_56-robbie . “ Yes , [I]_56-robbie am . ”_[56-robbie] [His]_56-robbie eyes come to [me]_2959-i , and [his]_56-robbie jaw ticks as if [he]_56-robbie ’s angered . “ Where are [you]_56-robbie going ? ”_[56-robbie] “ Out to dinner with [Molly]_198-molly and [Aaron]_0-aaron . ”_[56-robbie] “ Who ’s [Aaron]_0-aaron ? ”_[56-robbie] “ [[My]_56-robbie friend]_0-aaron [I]_56-robbie work with , [the one who sits next to [me]_56-robbie]_0-aaron . [He]_0-aaron ’s gay . ”_[56-robbie] “ Oh . ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie cuts into [his]_56-robbie toast , mollified for the moment . [I]_2959-i watch [him]_56-robbie for a moment as [he]_56-robbie eats in silence . “ Would it bother [you]_0-aaron if [I]_56-robbie were going clubbing ? ”_[56-robbie] [He]_56-robbie sips [his]_56-robbie coffee , stalling for [his]_56-robbie answer . “ Well , if [your]_0-aaron performance from last weekend is anything to go by , yes , it would . ”_[56-robbie] [I]_2959-i smile softly . “ What ? ”_[2959-i] “ Nothing . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug ; [I]_2959-i like that it bothers [him]_56-robbie . [He]_56-robbie rubs [his]_56-robbie hand up [my]_2959-i bare thigh and leans over to kiss [my]_2959-i cheek . “ [I]_56-robbie ’m not sharing [you]_56-robbie . [I]_56-robbie do n’t want [you]_56-robbie dancing with [anybody]_457-anybody . ”_[56-robbie] [I]_2959-i smile and rub [my]_2959-i hands through [his]_56-robbie stubble as [I]_2959-i look into [his]_56-robbie big blue eyes . “ Good , then [I]_2959-i wo n’t . ”_[2959-i] An hour later , [the limo]_{678-the limo} pulls up in front of [[my]_2959-i apartment]_{703-my building} . [Jameson]_186-jameson picks up [my]_2959-i hand and kisses the back of it as [his]_186-jameson eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ Until Tuesday . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i smile softly at [the beautiful man in front of [me]_2959-i]_{1096-the beautiful man in front of me} . “ Until Tuesday . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i kiss [him]_{1096-the beautiful man in front of me} softly on the lips . [The driver]_{530-the driver} opens the car door , and [I]_2959-i walk up to the front door of [[my]_2959-i building]_{703-my building} and turn and wave . [The car]_{369-the car} waits for [me]_2959-i to go inside and then pulls out slowly and drives down [the street]_{550-the street} . [I]_2959-i exhale heavily as [I]_2959-i anticipate spending the rest of [my]_2959-i weekend alone . Damn it , Tuesday is so far away . [I]_2959-i lie in a state of deep relaxation on [my]_2959-i couch . Rebelling against [Jameson]_186-jameson , [I]_2959-i did in fact order [Uber]_{153-uber eats} Eats for one , and yes , [I]_2959-i put the chain on [my]_2959-i door , just in case . [My]_2959-i phone dances across the table , and the name [Aaron]_0-aaron lights up the screen . “ Hello . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smirk . Damn , [this man]_56-robbie makes [me]_2959-i laugh . “ Oh . . . [my]_56-robbie fuck , ”_[56-robbie] [he]_56-robbie stammers . “ [I]_2959-i just hacked [Paul]_101-paul ’s email , and [he]_101-paul ’s meeting [a guy at a club]_{2805-a guy at a club} tonight . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sit up . “ What ? ”_[2959-i] “ Yes , and it gets worse . ”_[56-robbie] “ How can it possibly ? ”_[2959-i] “ [He]_101-paul ’s been on [Grindr]_102-grindr . ”_[2959-i] “ Oh [[my]_2959-i God]_{2363-my god} , are [you]_{2363-my god} kidding [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i gasp . “ [He]_101-paul ’s on [Grindr]_102-grindr ? ”_[2959-i] “ Yes , get dressed . [We]_2807-we are going down there to bust a move . ”_[2959-i] “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shriek . “ [You]_{2363-my god} heard [me]_2959-i . Put on something sexy . [I]_2959-i ’ll be there in half an hour . ”_[2959-i] “ But . . . ”_[56-robbie] The phone clicks as [he]_56-robbie hangs up . Oh shit . Damn it , [I]_2959-i do n’t want to go out tonight . [My]_2959-i phone rings again , and the name [Molly]_198-molly lights up the screen . “ [I]_198-molly know , ”_[198-molly] [I]_2959-i answer , knowing that [Aaron]_0-aaron would have called [her]_198-molly too . “ [He]_101-paul ’s on fucking [Grindr]_102-grindr ? ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly shrieks . “ [I]_198-molly know . ”_[198-molly] “ [You]_{2363-my god} do [me]_2959-i a favor . Tonight when [you]_{2363-my god} see [Paul]_101-paul ’s pencil dick , [you]_{2363-my god} grind it to a pulp with [your]_101-paul fucking shoe . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i giggle . “ [I]_2959-i ’m hoping not to see it , [Moll]_198-molly . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_198-molly ca n’t believe this shit , ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly snaps in outrage . “ [I]_198-molly know . ”_[198-molly] “ [Aaron]_0-aaron is way too good for [him]_0-aaron . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i know . Are [you]_{2363-my god} coming on [our]_2808-our bust - a - move mission ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_198-molly ca n’t . [I]_198-molly ’ve got [the kids]_{452-the kids} . Wear a GoPro strapped to [your]_101-paul head so [I]_198-molly can see what happens . ”_[198-molly] “ Ca n’t [you]_101-paul drop [the kids]_{452-the kids} with [[their]_{452-the kids} dad]_{2411-their dad} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ This is an emergency . ”_[2959-i] “ No . [He]_0-aaron ’s on a date with a whore bag . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i giggle again . “ Honestly , so much shit going on around here . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_198-molly know , ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly snaps . “ Okay , [I]_198-molly ’m calling [you]_0-aaron every hour . Answer [your]_0-aaron phone . ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly hangs up . An hour later , [Aaron]_0-aaron leads [me]_2959-i through [the nightclub]_{909-the club} by the hand as [he]_0-aaron scans [the club]_{909-the club} . It ’s small and dark , and the music is the dance - club type . The beat is tantric . “ Do [you]_0-aaron see [him]_0-aaron ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i call . “ Nope . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron narrows [his]_0-aaron eyes as [he]_0-aaron looks around . “ What are [you]_0-aaron going to do if [you]_0-aaron do see [him]_0-aaron ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ End it . ”_[2959-i] “ Why do n’t [you]_0-aaron just end it anyway ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ [I]_2959-i need proof . ”_[2959-i] “ The email is the proof , [Aaron]_0-aaron , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i huff . “ [I]_0-aaron knew [he]_0-aaron was up to something , ”_[0-aaron] [he]_0-aaron fumes . “ [That fucking asshole]_0-aaron has spent the last week in [my]_0-aaron bed , and [he]_0-aaron ’s trolling [Grindr]_102-grindr for sex . ”_[0-aaron] “ Were [you]_0-aaron in a relationship , like full - on ? ”_[2959-i] “ No , [he]_0-aaron said [he]_0-aaron did n’t want [a boyfriend]_{450-a boyfriend} but that [he]_0-aaron wanted to have sex with [me]_2959-i only . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . That sounds very familiar . “ So [you]_0-aaron ’ve been monogamous with [him]_0-aaron all along ? ”_[2959-i] “ Of course [I]_2959-i have . [I]_2959-i do n’t fuck around . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i scrunch up [my]_2959-i nose in disgust . “ Honestly , kick this douche to [the curb]_{549-the curb} . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i will . As soon as [I]_2959-i find [him]_0-aaron . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes and feel [my]_2959-i phone vibrate in [my]_2959-i bag . [I]_2959-i dig it out . “ Hello , [Molly]_198-molly . ”_[2959-i] “ What ’s happening ? ”_[2959-i] “ [We]_2813-we ca n’t find [him]_0-aaron , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reply as [I]_2959-i look around . “ Go and sit in the corner out of view , and wait for [them]_2813-we to get there . Do n’t stand where [they]_2813-we can see [you]_198-molly . ”_[2959-i] “ Oh , right . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i put [my]_2959-i hand over the phone . “ [Molly]_198-molly says [we]_1102-us should sit somewhere out of sight so [he]_0-aaron does n’t see [us]_1102-us . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron points at [me]_2959-i . “ Great idea . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron grabs [me]_2959-i by the hand and leads [us]_1102-us over to [a booth]_{1103-a booth} . “ [I]_0-aaron ’ll sit [here]_{385-new york} . [You]_0-aaron go and get drinks , ”_[0-aaron] [he]_0-aaron snaps as [he]_0-aaron slides into the seat . [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes . “ Are [[your]_0-aaron kids]_{2419-the two of them} really fucking [home]_2289-home ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap to [Molly]_198-molly . “ How did [I]_198-molly get stuck with this job ? ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly laughs . “ [I]_198-molly ’ll call back in an hour . ”_[198-molly] Then [she]_198-molly hangs up . “ What do [you]_198-molly want to drink ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ A pink flamingo . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i look at [him]_0-aaron deadpan . “ That is the gayest drink [I]_2959-i ever heard of . ”_[2959-i] “ Because [I]_0-aaron ’m gay . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron widens [his]_0-aaron eyes in exasperation ; [he]_0-aaron ’s in no mood for [my]_2959-i jokes tonight . “ Just get it . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i giggle and head to [the bar]_{459-the bar} to wait in line . “ Hey , [Foster]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i hear [a man]_{2300-a man} ’s voice call from behind . [I]_2959-i turn and see [Jake]_108-jay from [the investigation team]_{1106-the investigation team} . “ Oh , hi . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . “ What are [you]_108-jay doing here ? ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron holds up [his]_0-aaron drink . “ Drinking . ”_[0-aaron] “ Obviously . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smirk . [His]_0-aaron eyes scan up and down [my]_2959-i body in [my]_2959-i black dress . “ Wow , [you]_108-jay look hot . ”_[0-aaron] [I]_2959-i smile bashfully . This is awkward . “ Thanks . ”_[0-aaron] “ Want to come dance ? ”_[0-aaron] “ Um . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . Oh God . “ No , thanks anyway . [I]_2959-i ’m here with [Aaron]_0-aaron . ”_[2959-i] “ Oh , where is [he]_0-aaron ? ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron looks around . Oh shit , now [I]_2959-i ’ve done it . “ [He]_0-aaron ’s in a booth at the back . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_0-aaron ’ll go say hi . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron disappears off in that direction . Oh great . Now [we]_1107-we are going to have to act normal , when all [we]_1107-we want to do is [Paul]_101-paul - hate and [spy]_1108-spy . [I]_2959-i get [our]_1107-we drinks and head back to the table and find [Aaron]_0-aaron and [Jake]_108-jay deep in conversation about work . Hmm . [I]_2959-i wonder . Does [he]_0-aaron think [Aaron]_0-aaron ’s involved and is milking [him]_0-aaron for information ? [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i drink as [they]_1109-they talk , and [I]_2959-i do an internal assessment of [him]_0-aaron . [He]_0-aaron ’s actually quite good looking , with sandy hair , a square jaw , and dimples , and [he]_0-aaron has a great laugh . [I]_2959-i ’ve never noticed [him]_0-aaron before because whenever [Jameson]_186-jameson is in [the same room]_{1110-the same room} , [all men]_{2306-all men} pale in comparison . “ [I]_0-aaron ’m going to get a drink and come back and sit with [[you]_0-aaron guys]_{2579-you guys} , ”_[0-aaron] [he]_0-aaron says as [he]_0-aaron stands . “ [You]_0-aaron want one , [Foster]_186-jameson ? ”_[0-aaron] “ No thanks . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i fake a smile . “ [You]_0-aaron , [Az]_176-az ? ”_[2959-i] “ No , [I]_0-aaron ’m good , ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron replies . [He]_0-aaron disappears to [the bar]_{459-the bar} . “ Oh [my]_0-aaron God , ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron scoffs . “ [I]_0-aaron did n’t come here to talk about work , and what ’s with the fucking nicknames ? [He]_0-aaron ’s not [[my]_0-aaron friend]_{2617-my friend} . ”_[0-aaron] “ [I]_2959-i know , right ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes . “ Why did [you]_0-aaron tell [him]_0-aaron where [I]_2959-i was ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i do n’t know , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer . “ [He]_0-aaron put [me]_2959-i on the spot . ”_[2959-i] “ Ugh , great . Now [we]_2819-we have to sit with this wanker . ”_[2959-i] “ Can [we]_2819-we just go ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ This whole fucking night is a disaster . ”_[2959-i] “ No . [We]_2819-we are staying [here]_{385-new york} until the lights come on . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i put [my]_2959-i head into [my]_2959-i hands , and [my]_2959-i phone rings . “ Hello , [Molly]_198-molly , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap , annoyed that [she]_1113-she ’s avoided this hell . “ Nothing ’s fucking happened yet . ”_[1113-she] Monday morning , 10:00 a.m. [My]_2959-i phone on [my]_2959-i desk rings . “ Hello , [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_[246-alan] [Sammia]_246-alan says . “ [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} would like to see [you]_186-jameson in [[his]_1115-his office]_{426-his office} right away , please . ”_{[177-excitement]} [Excitement]_{177-excitement} runs through [me]_2959-i . “ Okay , [I]_2959-i ’ll come now . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i fix [my]_2959-i hair and reapply [my]_2959-i lipstick and practically run to [the elevator]_{670-the foyer} . [I]_2959-i hope [he]_1115-his ’s missed [me]_2959-i and is making an excuse to see [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i get to the top floor and stride through [the foyer]_{670-the foyer} . “ Hello , [Sammia]_246-alan . ”_[2959-i] “ Hi , [Emily]_186-jameson . Just go through . ”_[2959-i] “ Thank [you]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i can walk on the marble today , because [I]_2959-i finally bought those new shoes with the rubber soles . Not a click in sight . [I]_2959-i knock on [his]_1115-his door . “ Come in , ”_[1115-his] [his]_1115-his deep voice purrs . [I]_2959-i open the door , and [my]_2959-i face drops . [Jake]_108-jay is sitting in front of [[Jameson]_186-jameson ’s desk]_{1116-jameson ’s desk} . “ Hello . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . What ’s [he]_108-jay doing here ? [Buzz]_178-buzz off . This is [my]_2959-i time with [him]_108-jay . [Jake]_108-jay turns to [me]_2959-i , and [his]_108-jay face lights up . “ Hey , [Foster]_186-jameson . ”_[108-jay] [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s eyes hold [Jake]_108-jay ’s . “ [You]_108-jay two seem very chummy . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Oh , [we]_2822-we went clubbing together on Saturday night , did n’t [we]_2822-we , [Foz]_179-foz ? ”_[108-jay] [He]_108-jay smiles happily . [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s eyes come back to [me]_2959-i , and [his]_186-jameson jaw ticks in anger . Holy fuck . Chapter 13 “ Oh , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer in a fluster . “ [We]_2822-we ran into each other , that ’s all . ”_[2959-i] [Jameson]_186-jameson raises an eyebrow , unimpressed . “ Oh , do n’t be shy , [Foster]_186-jameson . [We]_2822-we get along famously , ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jake]_108-jay the imbecile says . [I]_2959-i feel the blood drain from [my]_2959-i face . Just shut the hell up , would [you]_108-jay ? [I]_2959-i turn back to [Jameson]_186-jameson , hoping to change the subject . “ [You]_108-jay wanted to see [me]_2959-i , [sir]_186-jameson ? ”_[2959-i] “ Yes . ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson eyes float over to [Jake]_108-jay . “ [I]_186-jameson want to know what leads [you]_108-jay have , [Mr. Peters]_246-alan . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Call [me]_186-jameson [Jake]_108-jay , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson says . [Jameson]_186-jameson glares at [him]_186-jameson but remains silent . [Oh man]_186-jameson . This is uncomfortable . [I]_2959-i grip [my]_2959-i notepad with white - knuckle force . Why did [he]_186-jameson have to say [we]_1117-we went out together ? [We]_1117-we did not go out together . [I]_2959-i feel [my]_2959-i face begin to perspire . “ Get to the point , ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson snaps . “ Well , [I]_186-jameson ’m chasing a few leads , nothing concrete yet . It ’s very early days . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Early days ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson repeats . “ Are [you]_186-jameson aware , [Mr. Peters]_246-alan , of the importance of a swift resolution on this matter ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Yes , [sir]_246-alan , but — ”_{[186-jameson]} “ No buts , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson growls . “ [Our]_1117-we stocks dropped by four million dollars today . Every damn day [they]_1117-we drop by that much . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson slams [his]_186-jameson hand on the table , making [us]_1117-we both jump . “ Do not tell [me]_186-jameson it ’s early days , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson bellows . [Jake]_108-jay and [I]_2959-i wither in [our]_1117-we chairs . [I]_2959-i ’ve never seen [Jameson]_186-jameson this angry . [He]_186-jameson is stressed . [I]_2959-i wonder if [he]_186-jameson went for a run this morning . [I]_2959-i ’m guessing not . “ [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i interrupt . [Jameson]_186-jameson puts [his]_186-jameson hand up to silence [me]_2959-i . “ [Emily]_186-jameson , [I]_186-jameson want four stories this week . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Yes , [sir]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [They]_2823-they need to be sharp , relevant , and , most importantly , traceable . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i nod . “ Okay . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_186-jameson can go , ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson snaps . “ That is all . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown as [my]_2959-i eyes flick between [him]_186-jameson and [Jake]_108-jay . Who ’s [he]_186-jameson talking to ? “ [Me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i point to [my]_2959-i chest . “ Yes , [you]_2959-i , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson snaps . “ Who else would [I]_186-jameson be talking to ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i feel anger flutter in [my]_2959-i stomach . “ Fine . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pick up [my]_2959-i notepad and stand . “ [I]_2959-i want the stories by four o’clock each day . ”_[2959-i] “ Very well , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i call as [I]_2959-i walk toward the door . “ Send [Tristan]_2430-tristan in , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson snaps . [I]_2959-i ’m not [[your]_2959-i damn secretary]_{1118-your damn secretary} . [I]_2959-i open the door and fake a smile . “ Sure , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say through gritted teeth as [I]_2959-i close the door behind [me]_2959-i . Damn rude pig . Who the heck does [he]_186-jameson think [he]_186-jameson is ? [I]_2959-i close [my]_2959-i eyes in pity for [Jake]_108-jay . [He]_186-jameson ’s going to get eaten alive in there . [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson is fucking mean when [he]_186-jameson ’s stressed . [I]_2959-i see why [he]_186-jameson runs — probably keeps [him]_186-jameson out of [jail]_1119-jail . Who knows what would happen if [he]_186-jameson did n’t exercise ? [I]_2959-i walk out to [the reception area]_{1120-the reception area} and then through to [the other side of [the building]_{361-the building}]_{1121-the other side of the building} , and [I]_2959-i knock on [Tristan]_2430-tristan ’s door . “ Come in , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [he]_2430-tristan calls . [I]_2959-i smile when [I]_2959-i hear how much [he]_2430-tristan sounds like [[his]_2430-tristan brother]_{617-his brother} . [I]_2959-i open the door . “ [Jameson]_186-jameson asked [me]_2959-i to . . . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pause as [I]_2959-i try to make it sound nicer than how it came out . “ [He]_2430-tristan wants to see [me]_2430-tristan ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan smirks . “ Yes . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan stands . “ Everything okay ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} [he]_2430-tristan asks casually as [we]_1124-we begin to walk back to reception . “ [He]_2430-tristan ’s . . . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug as [I]_2959-i try to think of a description . “ Agitated . ”_[2959-i] “ Hmm . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan frowns as if concerned . “ [He]_2430-tristan has a lot going on , but [you]_2430-tristan already know that . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ Yes . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile as [my]_2959-i eyes hold [his]_2430-tristan . Does [he]_2430-tristan know ? [He]_2430-tristan winks as [he]_2430-tristan walks down [the corridor]_{609-the corridor} toward [[Jameson]_186-jameson ’s office]_{2600-jameson ’s office} . “ Catch [you]_2430-tristan later . ”_{[2430-tristan]} What was that wink ? Was that code for “ [I]_2430-tristan know [you]_2430-tristan fuck [him]_2430-tristan ”_{[2430-tristan]} ? Does [he]_2430-tristan know [we]_1127-we are back together ? Shit . [The receptionist]_{625-the receptionist} is n’t at [her]_{625-the receptionist} desk , and [I]_2959-i glance down [the hallway]_{609-the corridor} toward [[Jameson]_186-jameson ’s office]_{2600-jameson ’s office} . Damn it , what ’s going on in there ? The door opens . Shit , [I]_2959-i do n’t want [them]_1127-we to see [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i duck behind the reception desk , and then [I]_2959-i hear [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s sharp voice as [he]_186-jameson says something , and [I]_2959-i wince . [Jake]_108-jay storms past and gets into [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} and hits the button with force . The doors close , and [my]_2959-i eyes widen as [I]_2959-i peer out from behind the desk . What the hell did [he]_186-jameson just say ? [Jameson]_186-jameson [I]_2959-i inhale deeply through [my]_2959-i nose as [I]_2959-i try to calm [myself]_2959-i down . “ For [God]_0-aaron ’s sake , [Jameson]_186-jameson , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan snaps . “ Tone it down . [The poor bastard]_2430-tristan is doing the best [he]_2430-tristan can . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ Bullshit . [He]_2430-tristan ’s useless . [He]_2430-tristan ’s been [here]_{385-new york} a week and has n’t a fucking clue what ’s going on . [He]_2430-tristan ’s more interested in chasing [the damn girls around [downstairs]_{2454-downstairs}]_{2825-the damn girls around downstairs} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i go to [the bar]_{459-the bar} and pour [myself]_2959-i a scotch and then walk over to the window and stare at [the city]_{2-the city} below . “ It ’s ten o’clock , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan says dryly as [he]_2430-tristan watches [me]_2959-i . “ So ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} [I]_2959-i snap as [I]_2959-i sip the scotch and feel the warmth of it roll down [my]_2959-i throat . “ And [the damn girl]_{356-my mother} [downstairs]_{2454-downstairs} would n’t happen to be [Emily Foster]_186-jameson , would it ? ”_[2959-i] “ Do n’t fucking start . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes . [I]_2959-i ’m fucking livid that [she]_{356-my mother} went out with [him]_2430-tristan on the weekend . “ Have [you]_186-jameson got the management report ? ”_{[356-my mother]} [I]_2959-i snap to change the subject . “ No , it ’s in [[my]_2430-tristan office]_{455-my office} . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan heads for the door . “ [I]_2430-tristan ’ll go get it . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan disappears as [I]_2959-i stare out over [New York]_{385-new york} . “ Hi . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [I]_2959-i hear a soft voice from behind [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i sigh as [my]_2959-i gaze stays out the window . “ Go back to work , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] “ Are [you]_186-jameson all right ? ”_{[356-my mother]} [she]_{356-my mother} says as [she]_{356-my mother} walks toward [me]_2959-i . “ [I]_{356-my mother} ’m fine . ”_{[356-my mother]} [I]_2959-i clench [my]_2959-i jaw to stop [myself]_2959-i from looking at [her]_{356-my mother} . [She]_{356-my mother} walks over and takes [my]_2959-i scotch from [me]_2959-i and goes to the sink and pours it down the drain . “ What the hell are [you]_186-jameson doing ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . [She]_{356-my mother} smiles up at [me]_2959-i and slides [her]_{356-my mother} hands under [my]_2959-i suit jacket and around [my]_2959-i waist . “ Looking after [[my]_{356-my mother} man]_{2829-my man} . ”_{[356-my mother]} “ Do n’t tip [my]_{356-my mother} fucking drink out . ”_{[356-my mother]} “ Then do n’t drink because [you]_{2829-my man} ’re stressed . [You]_{2829-my man} ’re playing with fire , [Jameson]_186-jameson . ”_{[356-my mother]} “ [You]_{2829-my man} ’re not [[my]_{356-my mother} mother]_{356-my mother} . ”_{[356-my mother]} [She]_{356-my mother} smiles sexily and goes up onto [her]_{356-my mother} toes and kisses [me]_2959-i softly . [I]_2959-i glare at [her]_{356-my mother} . “ [I]_2959-i ’m furious at [you]_{2829-my man} . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_{356-my mother} know . ”_{[356-my mother]} [She]_{356-my mother} kisses [me]_2959-i again . “ [I]_2959-i was n’t going out , and then [we]_2830-we had to spy on [[Aaron]_0-aaron ’s boyfriend]_{2831-aaron ’s boyfriend} because [he]_0-aaron was meeting [someone there from [Grindr]_102-grindr]_{2832-someone there from grindr} . And [Jake]_108-jay turned up and would n’t stop talking to [us]_2830-we . [He]_0-aaron ’s so annoying . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i glare at [her]_{356-my mother} . [She]_{356-my mother} smiles and snuggles into [my]_2959-i chest . “ [I]_{356-my mother} missed [you]_{356-my mother} this weekend . ”_{[356-my mother]} [I]_2959-i feel [myself]_2959-i relax for the first time since [I]_2959-i dropped [her]_{356-my mother} off at [home]_2289-home on Saturday . “ Do n’t miss [me]_2959-i , [Em]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sigh . “ [I]_{356-my mother} ca n’t help it . ”_{[356-my mother]} [She]_{356-my mother} kisses [my]_2959-i lips , totally oblivious to anything [I]_2959-i ’m saying . “ If [you]_{356-my mother} ’re stressed , [you]_{356-my mother} go down to [the gym]_{2412-the gym} , or [you]_{356-my mother} come and get [me]_2959-i . What about karate ? [I]_2959-i hear that ’s amazing . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes . “ Doing karate and turning into the fucking Kung Fu Panda will not relieve [my]_2959-i stress , [Emily]_186-jameson . It ’s laughable that [you]_186-jameson think that it would . ”_[2959-i] “ Okay , well , hell , go for a run . [I]_2959-i do n’t want [you]_186-jameson day drinking . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap [my]_2959-i arm around [her]_{356-my mother} waist , unable to control [myself]_2959-i any longer . “ And [I]_{356-my mother} told [you]_186-jameson [I]_{356-my mother} do n’t want [you]_186-jameson out with [other men]_{2834-other men} . Especially [him]_{356-my mother} . ”_{[356-my mother]} [She]_{356-my mother} runs [her]_{356-my mother} fingers through [my]_2959-i stubble as [she]_{356-my mother} smiles softly . “ [You]_186-jameson ’re [[my]_{356-my mother} only man]_186-jameson , ”_{[356-my mother]} [she]_{356-my mother} whispers up at [me]_2959-i . “ It ’s [you]_186-jameson that [I]_{356-my mother} ’m thinking about . ”_{[356-my mother]} [I]_2959-i feel [my]_2959-i anger slowly leave [me]_2959-i as [we]_1134-we kiss . “ [I]_{356-my mother} need [you]_186-jameson tonight , ”_{[356-my mother]} [she]_{356-my mother} says softly . God , [I]_2959-i need [her]_{356-my mother} too . No , stick to the rules . “ It ’s not Tuesday . ”_{[356-my mother]} “ [I]_{356-my mother} do n’t care . ”_{[356-my mother]} “ Do [you]_186-jameson have to disobey [me]_{356-my mother} on every single thing , [Ms. Foster]_{126-ms. foster} ? ”_{[356-my mother]} “ Just [you]_186-jameson wait to see how naughty [I]_{356-my mother} ’m going to be tonight , [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} , ”_{[356-my mother]} [she]_{356-my mother} breathes as [I]_2959-i pull [her]_{356-my mother} against [me]_2959-i to feel [my]_2959-i erection . “ Ahem . ”_{[356-my mother]} A voice sounds at the door , and [we]_1134-we both look up , startled . [Emily]_186-jameson jumps back from [me]_2959-i . “ [Tristan]_2430-tristan , ”_{[356-my mother]} [she]_{356-my mother} splutters . “ [I]_{356-my mother} was just . . . ”_{[356-my mother]} [Her]_{356-my mother} eyes flick between [him]_1135-him and [me]_2959-i . “ [I]_2430-tristan mean , [I]_2430-tristan . . . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan chuckles . “ Do [you]_2430-tristan want [me]_2430-tristan to leave ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ No , ”_{[356-my mother]} [she]_{356-my mother} stammers . “ [I]_{356-my mother} ’m leaving . ”_{[356-my mother]} [She]_{356-my mother} practically runs for the door . “ Ah , um , goodbye . ”_{[356-my mother]} [I]_2959-i smirk as [I]_2959-i watch [her]_{356-my mother} face turn a deep crimson . [Tristan]_2430-tristan already knows — [we]_1136-we tell [each other]_{2339-each other} everything . “ Goodbye , [Ms. Foster]_{126-ms. foster} . [I]_{356-my mother} shall send [the car]_{369-the car} for [you]_{126-ms. foster} at seven . ”_{[356-my mother]} [She]_{356-my mother} nods in embarrassment and scurries from [the office]_{385-new york} , and [I]_2959-i smile after [her]_{356-my mother} . [Tristan]_2430-tristan ’s eyes hold [mine]_2959-i for a moment . “ [She]_{356-my mother} ’s good for [you]_{126-ms. foster} . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ That ’s debatable . ”_{[186-jameson]} [Emily]_186-jameson [I]_2959-i smile broadly at the closed elevator doors in front of [me]_2959-i . It worked . [I]_2959-i wanted to calm [him]_2430-tristan down , and it worked . [He]_2430-tristan ’s a mirror . If [I]_2959-i ’m calm , [he]_2430-tristan ’s calm . Maybe if [I]_2959-i ’m honest , [he]_2430-tristan ’ll be honest , and [I]_2959-i do n’t know what that means for [my]_2959-i little hard - to - get act , but [I]_2959-i guess [I]_2959-i ’ll find out soon enough . [He]_2430-tristan did n’t seem annoyed when [I]_2959-i told [him]_2430-tristan [I]_2959-i missed [him]_2430-tristan — [he]_2430-tristan actually seemed relieved . Or maybe that ’s just wishful thinking on [my]_2959-i part . [I]_2959-i get back to [my]_2959-i floor , and [my]_2959-i eyes scan [the room]_{514-the room} as [I]_2959-i walk back to [my]_2959-i desk . [Somebody]_251-somebody working here , alongside [me]_2959-i , is [a thief]_{1141-a thief} . [They]_1142-they ’re stealing from [the Miles family]_{1143-the miles family} ; [the company]_{2358-the company} ’s value is plummeting , and [[my]_2959-i [Jay]_108-jay]_{1145-my jay} is stressed beyond belief . [I]_2959-i wish [I]_2959-i could talk to [Molly]_198-molly and [Aaron]_0-aaron about this . [I]_2959-i ’m sure if [we]_1146-we brainstormed together , [we]_1146-we could come up with more than [Jake]_108-jay has . [I]_2959-i ca n’t ; [I]_2959-i gave [them]_1142-they [my]_2959-i word [I]_2959-i would n’t tell a soul . [I]_2959-i take a seat back at [my]_2959-i desk . “ How did it go ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron asks . “ Fine , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i lie . “ It ’s blatantly obvious that [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} has a thing for [you]_0-aaron . ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly smirks . “ Why is it ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ [We]_2836-we never got this kind of specialized training program . ”_[198-molly] [Her]_198-molly eyes flick to [Aaron]_0-aaron . “ Did [we]_2836-we ? ”_[198-molly] “ Nope , ”_[2959-i] [he]_2959-i replies as [his]_2959-i eyes stay glued to [his]_2959-i computer . “ Please tell [me]_2959-i [you]_0-aaron are secretly going up there to suck [his]_2959-i dick . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smirk but stay silent . [Molly]_198-molly ’s eyes come to [me]_2959-i in question . “ Are [you]_0-aaron ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug . [I]_2959-i ca n’t lie to [them]_1147-them ; [I]_2959-i just wo n’t elaborate . “ What the fuck ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron whispers as [he]_0-aaron rolls [his]_0-aaron chair over to [mine]_2959-i ; [Molly]_198-molly , too , rolls [her]_198-molly chair over next to [mine]_2959-i . “ [You]_0-aaron have seen [him]_0-aaron ? ”_[198-molly] “ Possibly . ”_[198-molly] “ What the fuck ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly whispers . “ When ? ”_[198-molly] “ A few times , but Friday night was the last time [I]_0-aaron saw [him]_0-aaron . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron does a cross over [his]_0-aaron chest and pretends to pray . “ Thank [you]_0-aaron , [Jesus]_107-jesus . ”_[0-aaron] “ But do n’t say anything , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ It ’s just very casual , nothing to get excited about yet . ”_[2959-i] [Molly]_198-molly ’s eyes widen in exasperation . “ Are [you]_0-aaron kidding [me]_198-molly ? [Screwing Jameson Miles]_186-jameson is something to get excited about , [woman]_76-woman . Have [you]_0-aaron seen [him]_0-aaron ? ”_[198-molly] [I]_2959-i smile broadly at [their]_1148-their over - the - top reactions . “ [I]_2959-i ’m just playing it cool , but [I]_2959-i am going up there for a project with [Tristan]_2430-tristan and not to see [Jay]_108-jay . ”_[2959-i] That ’s not lying — it is true . . . ish . [Aaron]_0-aaron puts [his]_0-aaron hand over [his]_0-aaron chest . “ Oh hell , [she]_198-molly calls [him]_108-jay [Jay]_108-jay . Be still [my]_0-aaron beating heart . ”_[0-aaron] “ Kill [me]_198-molly now . ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly sighs dreamily . “ Have [you]_0-aaron been to [[his]_108-jay apartment]_{2529-your house} ? ”_[198-molly] “ Uh - huh , and [he]_108-jay spent the night at [mine]_2959-i . ”_[1148-their] [Their]_1148-their eyes widen . “ [He]_108-jay came to [[your]_0-aaron house]_{2529-your house} ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron shrieks . “ Shh , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper as [I]_2959-i look at [the people around [us]_1150-us]_{540-the people around us} . “ Keep it down , and [you]_0-aaron ca n’t tell a soul . Especially not [Ava]_77-ava — [you]_0-aaron know what [she]_77-ava ’s like . ”_[2959-i] “ Oh God , can [you]_0-aaron imagine ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly rolls [her]_198-molly eyes . “ [She]_77-ava ’ll be [your]_0-aaron new bestie if [she]_77-ava knows [you]_0-aaron are with [him]_0-aaron . [She]_77-ava ’ll be stuck to [you]_0-aaron like glue if there ’s a chance [she]_77-ava will get to [[his]_0-aaron brothers]_{2390-his brothers} . ”_[198-molly] “ Well , [she]_77-ava ca n’t have [Tristan]_2430-tristan . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i tut as [I]_2959-i turn on [my]_2959-i computer . “ [He]_0-aaron ’s way too nice for [her]_77-ava . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug . “ [He]_0-aaron ’s taken , anyway , [I]_1151-i think . ”_[1151-i] [We]_1151-i begin to work , and [Aaron]_0-aaron ’s phone rings . “ It ’s [Paul]_101-paul , ”_[0-aaron] [he]_0-aaron stammers in a panic . “ Decline , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say without looking up . “ But [I]_0-aaron want to see what [he]_0-aaron has to say . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron picks up the phone , and [Molly]_198-molly snatches it from [him]_0-aaron and hits decline . “ [He]_0-aaron says ‘ fuck [me]_198-molly on [Grindr]_102-grindr ’ to [the whole world]_{2840-the whole world} . Will [you]_0-aaron stop being pathetic ? Kick [this asshole]_102-grindr to [the curb]_{549-the curb} , ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly snaps . [Aaron]_0-aaron ’s shoulders slump sadly . [I]_2959-i rub [his]_0-aaron back in sympathy . “ It will get easier , [babe]_0-aaron . ”_[2959-i] “ Yeah , when [we]_2842-we set fire to [his]_0-aaron sleazy ball sack , ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly whispers angrily . [I]_2959-i giggle . “ Set fire to [his]_0-aaron sleazy ball sack — [you]_0-aaron speak with such articulation , [Moll]_198-molly . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_198-molly know , right ? This is why [I]_198-molly ’m [a reporter]_{2566-a reporter} . ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly stands . “ [I]_198-molly ’m going to make [us]_2842-we coffee . [You]_0-aaron both want one ? ”_[198-molly] “ Uh - huh . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron blows out a deflated breath . “ Can [you]_0-aaron find [us]_2842-we some cake too ? Surely it ’s [somebody]_251-somebody ’s birthday around here . ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly looks around . “ Yep , where ’s [that Uber guy]_246-alan when [we]_2842-we need [him]_246-alan ? ”_[198-molly] [Her]_198-molly eyes come to [me]_2959-i . “ Oh [my]_2959-i God , was that cheesecake last week sent from [Jameson]_186-jameson ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile broadly . [Aaron]_0-aaron puts [his]_0-aaron head down and pretends to hit it on the desk . “ [He]_0-aaron even sends cheesecakes . [The man]_246-alan is a for [real fucking god]_{2846-real fucking god} . ”_[0-aaron] [Buzz]_178-buzz goes [my]_2959-i door buzzer . “ Hello . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . “ Hello , [Ms. Foster]_{126-ms. foster} . This is [Alan]_246-alan , [[Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} ’s driver]_{126-ms. foster} . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i face falls . “ Oh . Is everything all right ? ”_[2959-i] “ Yes , [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} asked [me]_2959-i to collect [you]_246-alan and take [you]_246-alan to [[his]_0-aaron apartment]_{766-my apartment} . [He]_0-aaron ’s been delayed on a conference call and will be joining [you]_246-alan shortly . ”_[2959-i] “ Oh , okay . [I]_2959-i ’m on [my]_2959-i way . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i grab [my]_2959-i overnight bag that [I]_2959-i packed , and with one last look around [[my]_2959-i apartment]_{766-my apartment} , [I]_2959-i head [downstairs]_{2454-downstairs} . [I]_2959-i walk out onto [the curb]_{549-the curb} to see [the driver in [his]_{1155-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo} customary black suit standing next to [the limo]_{678-the limo}]_{1155-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo} . “ Hello , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say nervously as [I]_2959-i approach [him]_{1155-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo} . “ Hello . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i ’m [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i hold out [my]_2959-i hand , embarrassed that [I]_2959-i have n’t introduced [myself]_2959-i before now . “ [I]_{1155-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo} ’m [Alan]_246-alan . ”_{[1155-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo]} [He]_{1155-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo} smiles warmly as [we]_1157-we shake hands . “ Are [you]_246-alan ready ? ”_{[1155-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo]} “ Yes . ”_{[1155-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo]} [He]_{1155-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo} opens the door , and [I]_2959-i climb into the back of [the car]_{369-the car} . [He]_{1155-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo} closes the door , and [we]_1157-we drive through the [New York]_{385-new york} night . This does n’t seem real — [me]_2959-i sitting in the back of [a limo]_{1159-a limo} being driven to [[Jameson]_186-jameson ’s apartment]_{1160-his building} by [[his]_{1155-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo} driver]_{739-his driver} . [We]_1157-we get to [[his]_{1155-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo} building]_{1160-his building} , and [he]_{1155-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo} stops in [the pull - up area]_{1162-the pull - up area} and opens the door . “ [I]_{1155-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo} ’ll take [you]_{1155-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo} up . ”_{[1155-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo]} [He]_{1155-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo} goes to take [my]_2959-i bag from [me]_2959-i . “ It ’s okay . [I]_{1155-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo} ’ve got it . Thank [you]_{1155-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo} anyway . ”_{[1155-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo]} [He]_{1155-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo} frowns . [I]_2959-i see [his]_{1155-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo} disappointment . “ Unless [you]_{1155-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo} want to carry it , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i splutter . “ Thank [you]_{1155-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo} . ”_{[1155-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo]} [He]_{1155-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo} smiles as [he]_{1155-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo} takes it from [me]_2959-i . “ [I]_93-jeez would prefer to . ”_[93-jeez] [Jeez]_93-jeez . [He]_{1155-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo} got offended that [I]_2959-i wanted to carry [my]_2959-i own bag . What is this alternate universe ? [We]_1163-we get into [the swanky elevator]_{1164-the swanky elevator} , and [the attendant]_{278-the attendant} already knows what floor to take [me]_2959-i to . [He]_{1155-the driver in his customary black suit standing next to the limo} must know [Alan]_246-alan . [I]_2959-i hold [my]_2959-i breath , nervous as [we]_1163-we ride in silence . [We]_1163-we get to the floor , and [I]_2959-i tentatively follow [Alan]_246-alan as [he]_246-alan opens the door . “ [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} should n’t be long . [He]_246-alan ’s still at [the office]_{385-new york} . [His]_246-alan call is going longer than [he]_246-alan expected . ”_[246-alan] “ Thank [you]_246-alan . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . “ Can [I]_2959-i get [you]_246-alan anything else ? ”_[2959-i] “ No , all good . ”_[246-alan] With a courteous nod , [he]_246-alan closes the door and leaves [me]_2959-i alone . [I]_2959-i turn to see the lamps strategically on , creating a breathtaking canvas to the view . The twinkling lights over [New York]_{385-new york} are nothing short of spectacular . [I]_2959-i take [my]_2959-i phone out and snap some pictures . [I]_2959-i could n’t be such a fangirl when [he]_246-alan is [here]_{385-new york} . [I]_2959-i walk into [the bedroom]_{758-the bedroom} and put [my]_2959-i bag into [the empty walk - in closet]_{1168-the empty walk - in closet} , and then [I]_2959-i walk into [his]_246-alan . Suits and business shirts are strategically lined up , and there are rows and rows of expensive polished shoes . [I]_2959-i run [my]_2959-i hand over the sleeves of the suits as [I]_2959-i look around . [I]_2959-i open the top drawer of the dresser , and [I]_2959-i smile at [his]_246-alan over - the - top organization . [His]_246-alan ties are all rolled and displayed as if this is [[a luxury men]_{1169-a luxury men} ’s boutique]_{1170-a luxury men ’s boutique} . Watches . . . [I]_2959-i count [them]_{1169-a luxury men} . Ten expensive watches are lined up . And then [I]_2959-i see something rolled up next to [his]_246-alan watches . [My]_2959-i heart stops when [I]_2959-i see the initials . E.F. [My]_2959-i scarf . [He]_246-alan kept it . Not only did [he]_246-alan keep it , but it ’s also with [his]_246-alan special things . [I]_2959-i pick it up and hold it in [my]_2959-i hands as [I]_2959-i stare at it . [My]_2959-i eyes close , and [I]_2959-i inhale deeply ; the faint smell of [my]_2959-i perfume still lingers . [I]_2959-i did n’t imagine it back then . [He]_246-alan was right there with [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i smile broadly and put the scarf back where it was and carefully close the drawer . [I]_2959-i do n’t know what to do with this information , but [I]_2959-i ’m pretty damn pleased with [my]_2959-i find . [My]_2959-i heart is racing . [He]_246-alan kept it . [I]_2959-i walk through [the apartment]_{2627-the apartment} as [I]_2959-i look around . [I]_2959-i run [my]_2959-i hand over the heavy marble countertops in [the kitchen]_{683-the kitchen} and smile at the sheer luxury of [the place]_{2627-the apartment} . [I]_2959-i wonder if [he]_246-alan has eaten . [I]_2959-i open the fridge , but it ’s surprisingly sparse . There is chicken and a few ingredients . [I]_2959-i open [the pantry]_{683-the kitchen} and find some other things . [I]_2959-i glance at the wine fridge and frown — it ’s full . Of course it is . How often does [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} have a liquid dinner ? Hmm , [I]_2959-i need to get a grip on this stress of [his]_{79-mr. miles} . [I]_2959-i pour [myself]_2959-i a glass of wine , take out the ingredients , and look through the cupboards to find the pots and pans and chopping boards and knives . [I]_2959-i search [Spotify]_181-spotify on [my]_2959-i phone and put on some chill music . [I]_2959-i begin to chop the chicken with a huge goofy smile on [my]_2959-i face . [He]_246-alan kept [my]_2959-i scarf . Forty - five minutes later , [I]_2959-i hear the front door open . “ [Em]_2848-em ? ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan calls . “ In [the kitchen]_{683-the kitchen} . ”_[246-alan] “ Hmm . . . something smells good . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan kisses [me]_2959-i and wraps [his]_246-alan arms around [me]_2959-i from behind . “ What are [you]_2959-i cooking ? ”_[246-alan] “ Fuck bunny stew . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan laughs loudly , and it ’s a beautiful sound . It does things to [my]_2959-i insides . “ Does [[your]_2959-i mother]_{2345-your mother} know [you]_2959-i ’re [a cannibal]_{2851-a cannibal} ? ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan kisses [my]_2959-i cheek from behind . [I]_2959-i giggle as [I]_2959-i stir the pot . “ No , and do n’t tell [her]_{2345-your mother} . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_2959-i did n’t need to cook . [I]_246-alan would have taken [you]_2959-i out . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan pours [himself]_246-alan a glass of wine . “ It ’s Monday . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ And ? ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan sips [his]_246-alan wine . “ [You]_2959-i do n’t go out to dinner on a school night . ”_[246-alan] “ [I]_246-alan go out every night . ”_[246-alan] “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ [You]_2959-i eat out every night ? ”_[2959-i] “ Yeah , of course . Why ? ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i mouth falls open , and [I]_2959-i put [my]_2959-i hand on [my]_2959-i hip . “ [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson , [you]_2959-i have more money than sense . How do [you]_2959-i relax if [you]_2959-i go out to dinner every night ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_246-alan sit in [a restaurant]_{760-a restaurant} and eat . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan shrugs . “ It ’s really quite easy . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes in disgust as [I]_2959-i keep stirring . “ Are [you]_2959-i hungry ? ”_[2959-i] “ Starving . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan takes [me]_2959-i in [his]_246-alan arms and stares down at [me]_2959-i . “ Did [you]_2959-i really miss [me]_246-alan over the weekend ? ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i go up onto [my]_2959-i toes and kiss [his]_246-alan big beautiful lips . “ [I]_246-alan did , actually . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan holds [me]_2959-i tight . “ This is where [you]_2959-i tell [me]_2959-i that [you]_2959-i missed [me]_2959-i too , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i mutter dryly into [his]_246-alan shoulder . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t miss [people]_248-people . ”_[2959-i] “ Ugh , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i huff as [I]_2959-i pull out of [his]_246-alan arms and go back to stirring the dinner . “ Can [you]_2959-i go out of [the room]_{514-the room} so [I]_2959-i can drug [your]_2959-i food now ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ [I]_246-alan plan on robbing [[your]_2959-i place]_{2786-your place} . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan chuckles . “ Only if [you]_2959-i promise to take advantage of [my]_2959-i body while [I]_2959-i ’m sleeping . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i giggle . “ Deal . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i dish up [our]_1173-our dinner , and [we]_1173-our take seats at the kitchen counter . [I]_2959-i hold [my]_2959-i breath as [he]_246-alan takes [his]_246-alan first bite . “ Hmm , delicious , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan hums . [I]_2959-i smile proudly . “ A fuck bunny who cooks . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan smirks around a forkful of food . “ [I]_246-alan love to cook . It ’s [my]_246-alan hobby . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan frowns and watches [me]_2959-i for a moment . “ [I]_246-alan ’ve never met [anyone]_272-anyone quite like [you]_272-anyone , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_[246-alan] “ Why ? ”_[246-alan] “ [I]_246-alan do n’t know . [I]_246-alan ca n’t put [my]_246-alan finger on it . [You]_272-anyone ’re very . . . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan pauses as [he]_246-alan thinks of the right word . “ Unaffected . ”_[246-alan] “ Unaffected by what ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smirk as [I]_2959-i eat . [He]_246-alan shrugs . “ [New York]_{385-new york} . ”_[246-alan] “ [You]_272-anyone ’ve never had [a girlfriend who cooked for [you]_272-anyone before]_{2857-a girlfriend who cooked for you before} ? ”_[246-alan] “ [I]_246-alan ’ve only ever had one serious relationship , and [she]_1174-you was a workaholic like [me]_246-alan . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan shrugs . “ [We]_2858-we would both get [home]_2289-home too late from work . Eating out was easier . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i wine as [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_246-alan . [I]_2959-i would love to blurt out a million questions about [her]_1174-you . . . but [I]_2959-i wo n’t . [I]_2959-i ’ll play it cool . [He]_246-alan moves to get [his]_246-alan wine , and [he]_246-alan winces . “ What ’s wrong ? ”_[246-alan] “ [My]_246-alan back ’s tight . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan stands and twists [his]_246-alan upper body to stretch . “ [Somebody]_182-somebody insisted on [me]_246-alan firing [my]_246-alan masseuse . ”_[246-alan] “ Oh , [her]_1174-you , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i scoff . “ Do n’t ruin [my]_246-alan night . [I]_246-alan ’ll find [you]_1174-you a new masseuse tomorrow . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan stretches some more . “ Please do . ”_[246-alan] “ Why does [your]_1174-you back get so tight ? ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan sits back down . “ When [I]_246-alan get wound up , [my]_246-alan back tightens . ”_[246-alan] “ What else happens when [you]_1174-you get wound up ? ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan chews [his]_246-alan food as if contemplating [his]_246-alan answer . “ [My]_2959-i temper gets the best of [me]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile broadly . “ What ? ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan smirks . “ All this time [I]_246-alan thought [you]_1174-you were [an asshole]_{662-an asshole} , when really [you]_1174-you were just stressed out ? ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan chuckles . “ And what ’s [your]_1174-you excuse for being [a bitch]_{2519-a bitch} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i wine . “ Nothing . [I]_246-alan really am just [a bitch]_{2519-a bitch} . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan holds [his]_246-alan glass up to clink it with [mine]_2959-i . [His]_246-alan eyes have a tender glow to them . “ Thank [you]_1174-you for dinner . It ’s delicious . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan leans over and kisses [me]_2959-i . “ Like [you]_1174-you . ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i remember something . “ Oh , and [you]_1174-you will be pleased to know , [I]_2959-i brought [my]_2959-i workout gear so [I]_2959-i can come running in the morning . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_1174-you did ? ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan asks in surprise . “ Uh - huh . ”_[246-alan] “ [I]_2959-i run fast . ”_[2959-i] “ Good , because [I]_246-alan walk slow . ”_[246-alan] A few hours later [we]_1175-we both laugh out loud into the darkness . “ [You]_1174-you did not , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan says . [I]_2959-i giggle . “ Uh - huh . ”_[2959-i] It ’s late , and [we]_1175-we are lying in bed , facing each other , and talking after making love . “ What on [earth]_872-earth ? ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan rubs [his]_246-alan hand up over [my]_2959-i stomach and then breast as [he]_246-alan listens . [His]_246-alan face is alight with mischief . “ How ? ”_[246-alan] “ Well . . . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i think for a moment . “ It was [[my]_246-alan first car]_{2863-my first car} , and [I]_246-alan ’d only had it a week . [I]_246-alan was driving with [[my]_246-alan friend]_{2617-my friend} , and the day was as hot as hell . [We]_1175-we were on [our]_1175-we way to buy some cheap jeans from a market , and the temperature gauge started overheating . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan smiles as [he]_246-alan listens . “ [We]_1175-we pulled into [a service station]_{2865-a service station} , and [I]_2959-i called [[my]_2959-i dad]_{2617-my friend} , and [he]_{2617-my friend} told [me]_2959-i to put oil in it . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug . “ But [we]_1175-we did n’t know where the oil went , so [we]_1175-we assumed it went in the little hole that [you]_2866-you measure it from . ”_[2959-i] “ The dipstick ? ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan gasps in disbelief . “ How on earth did [you]_2866-you get it in there ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i laugh . This is the most ridiculous story [I]_2959-i ever heard of . “ [We]_1176-we borrowed a funnel and then poured it in , and it overflowed everywhere . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shake [my]_2959-i head as [I]_2959-i remember it as clear as day . “ [We]_1176-we thought it was fine and started driving , and then oil [we]_1176-we ’d spilled on the engine caught on fire . ”_[246-alan] [His]_246-alan eyes widen . “ What happened ? ”_[246-alan] “ [My]_1176-we beloved [five - hundred - dollar car]_{2867-five - hundred - dollar car} that [I]_1176-we saved up for a year for was frigging totaled in just one week ; that ’s what happened . ”_[1176-we] [We]_1176-we both laugh and then eventually fall silent . [I]_2959-i lean onto [my]_2959-i elbow as [I]_2959-i look over at [the gorgeous naked man beside [me]_2959-i]_76-woman . “ [You]_76-woman must have done something stupid in [your]_76-woman life , [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson . ”_[76-woman] [He]_76-woman smiles softly over at [me]_2959-i in the darkness . “ Yeah . [I]_76-woman have . ”_[76-woman] “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smirk . [He]_76-woman reaches over and cups [my]_2959-i face in [his]_76-woman hand , and [his]_76-woman thumb dusts over [my]_2959-i bottom lip . “ [I]_76-woman never asked for [your]_76-woman number . ”_[76-woman] Chapter 14 “ Will [you]_76-woman hurry up , [woman]_76-woman ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson calls from [his]_76-woman running position up in front . [I]_2959-i ’m panting for dear life as [I]_2959-i try to keep up . Oh hell , [he]_76-woman ’s trying to kill [me]_2959-i . “ What ’s the rush ? ”_[76-woman] [He]_76-woman turns around and runs back to [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i frown as [I]_2959-i watch [him]_76-woman . “ [God]_0-aaron , [you]_0-aaron ’re so perky and energetic in the morning . ”_[76-woman] [He]_76-woman laughs and sprints off as [I]_2959-i keep shuffling along . [I]_2959-i watch [him]_76-woman do a loop so that [he]_76-woman can still see [me]_2959-i , and then [he]_76-woman sprints back . “ How do [you]_0-aaron run so fast ? ”_[76-woman] [He]_76-woman jogs backward in front of [me]_2959-i as [we]_1178-we talk . “ Well , what [I]_76-woman do is [I]_76-woman imagine [someone]_2326-someone is chasing [me]_76-woman with an ax . ”_[76-woman] [He]_76-woman ’s hardly even out of breath . “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ Are [you]_0-aaron kidding [me]_76-woman ? ”_[76-woman] [He]_76-woman shakes [his]_76-woman head with a cheeky grin . “ [Your]_0-aaron relaxation tool is to imagine [someone]_2326-someone is chasing [you]_0-aaron with a fucking ax . ”_[76-woman] [He]_76-woman laughs as [he]_76-woman jogs backward . “ It works . [I]_76-woman run much faster that way . ”_[76-woman] “ This is all making sense now , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i puff . “ The puzzle is falling into place here . ”_[2959-i] “ What puzzle ? ”_[76-woman] “ [Your]_0-aaron back is tight because [[your]_0-aaron masseuse]_{2869-your masseuse} continually puts it out so [she]_{2869-your masseuse} can fuck [you]_0-aaron again . ”_[76-woman] [He]_76-woman grins . “ [Your]_0-aaron relaxation exercise is to be chased by [an ax murderer]_{2870-an ax murderer} . ”_[76-woman] [He]_76-woman laughs . “ And [you]_0-aaron go out seven nights a week . No wonder [you]_0-aaron ’re stressed out , [[you]_0-aaron crazy bastard]_0-aaron . ”_[76-woman] [He]_76-woman pulls [me]_2959-i to [him]_76-woman by [my]_2959-i T - shirt and kisses [me]_2959-i on the lips . “ Lucky [I]_76-woman have [you]_0-aaron to fuck [me]_76-woman calm , then , is n’t it ? ”_[76-woman] “ Damn straight , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pant . [We]_1179-we need to stop talking . [I]_2959-i ca n’t run and talk at the same time . What kind of [Olympic athlete]_{1180-olympic athlete} does [he]_{1180-olympic athlete} think [I]_2959-i am ? “ What exercise would [you]_0-aaron recommend [I]_76-woman do ? For relaxing , [I]_76-woman mean , ”_[76-woman] [he]_76-woman asks as [he]_76-woman falls in to jog beside [me]_2959-i slowly . [I]_2959-i think for a moment . “ Aqua aerobics . ”_[2959-i] “ Ha . ”_[76-woman] [He]_76-woman laughs . “ [I]_76-woman ’m not that old . ”_[76-woman] “ [You]_76-woman ’re pretty old , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pant . “ Do [you]_76-woman want to race [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] “ No . ”_[76-woman] “ Why not ? ”_[76-woman] “ Because [that murderer]_{2871-that murderer} has [his]_{2871-that murderer} ax in [my]_76-woman lungs , and [I]_76-woman ’m about to die at any second . [I]_76-woman hope [you]_76-woman know resuscitation . ”_[76-woman] [He]_76-woman chuckles . “ [Wimp]_183-wimp . ”_[76-woman] [He]_76-woman takes off at high speed , and [I]_2959-i shuffle along and smile as [I]_2959-i watch [him]_76-woman loop [Central Park]_{17-central park} as [he]_76-woman always keeps [me]_2959-i in sight . [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson is extremely fit . . . and extremely hot . And luckily for [me]_2959-i , [I]_2959-i ’m [his]_76-woman fuck bunny . [I]_2959-i stand in [the foyer]_{670-the foyer} as [I]_2959-i wait for [Ava]_77-ava and [Molly]_198-molly . [We]_1182-we ’re just going on [our]_1182-we lunch break , and [Molly]_198-molly is talking to [one of [the security guards]_{1184-the security guards}]_{1183-one of the security guards} . [I]_2959-i think [she]_198-molly ’s a little sweet on [him]_76-woman . “ [You]_93-jeez coming out this weekend ? ”_[198-molly] [Ava]_77-ava asks . “ Um , [I]_93-jeez ’m not sure what [I]_93-jeez ’m doing yet . [I]_93-jeez might be going [home]_2289-home . ”_[93-jeez] [Jeez]_93-jeez , [I]_2959-i do n’t really want to go out with [her]_198-molly again . [She]_198-molly ’s only interested in [men]_330-men if [they]_330-men have money . That ’s just so left field for [me]_2959-i that [I]_2959-i ca n’t deal with it . One of [the elevators]_{1186-the elevators} opens , and [Tristan]_2430-tristan steps out and then [Jameson]_186-jameson . [They]_330-men have [two other men with [them]_330-men]_{1187-two other men with them} . Wearing a navy suit and a crisp white shirt , [he]_186-jameson is the epitome of [gorgeous man]_246-alan . Dark hair , square jaw , and those piercing blue eyes . It ’s hard to believe that just six hours ago , [he]_186-jameson was deep inside [my]_2959-i body in the shower . [He]_186-jameson took [me]_2959-i twice when [we]_1189-we got [home]_2289-home from [our]_1189-we run this morning . [The man]_246-alan ’s an animal . [His]_246-alan dick is out of [this world]_{1191-this world} . [I]_2959-i ’ve died and gone to [CEO heaven]_186-jameson . “ Oh [my]_77-ava God , ”_[77-ava] [Ava]_77-ava whispers . “ Look who ’s coming . ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson is deep in conversation with [the men]_{378-the men} as [the four of [them]_{378-the men}]_{378-the men} stride through [the crowded foyer]_{1193-the crowded foyer} . [Everyone]_{2304-everyone} stops and stares . [I]_2959-i stand still as [he]_246-alan walks past , and at the last moment [he]_246-alan glances up and catches sight of [me]_2959-i . [His]_246-alan step falters , and [I]_2959-i give [him]_246-alan a subtle shake of [my]_2959-i head . [I]_2959-i do n’t want [anyone]_272-anyone to know about [us]_1196-they . [He]_246-alan nods once as if in understanding and keeps walking as [he]_246-alan falls back into [his]_246-alan conversation . [We]_1196-they watch as [they]_1196-they leave through the front doors and disappear up [the street]_{550-the street} . [They]_1196-they must be going out for lunch . “ Seriously , where do [we]_1196-they find [[men]_330-men like [the Miles brothers]_{824-the miles brothers}]_{2874-men like the miles brothers} ? ”_[77-ava] [Ava]_77-ava sighs . “ Right ? ”_[77-ava] [I]_2959-i watch [the street]_{550-the street} [they]_1196-they disappeared up . “ One of these days , ”_[77-ava] [she]_77-ava whispers . “ One of these days . ”_[77-ava] [I]_2959-i wonder if [Jameson]_186-jameson had a long and boozy lunch , and more importantly , did [he]_186-jameson bring back cake ? It ’s getting to that time of the day where [my]_2959-i mind is fixed firmly on something sweet to have with [my]_2959-i coffee . “ Hi , [Emily]_186-jameson , have [you]_186-jameson got [your]_186-jameson stories [we]_2876-we are running with tomorrow ? ”_[266-jim] [Hayden]_266-jim asks . [I]_2959-i smile up at [him]_266-jim . Hmm . “ [I]_2959-i did n’t think [they]_1196-they were due until four , and it ’s only three . ”_[2959-i] [Hayden]_266-jim is [the person who [I]_2959-i turn the news in to]_266-jim , and [he]_266-jim then passes [them]_1196-they on to [the next stage]_{1198-the next stage} . “ [I]_266-jim know , but [I]_266-jim like to get a head start , ”_[266-jim] [he]_266-jim says casually . [Head]_184-head start on what ? Is [he]_266-jim the one selling the stories ? Is that why [he]_266-jim wants [them]_1196-they early , so [he]_266-jim can get [them]_1196-they off to the highest bidder ? “ [They]_1196-they ’re not ready yet . ”_[266-jim] “ Okay , cool . ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim smiles . “ Email them over as soon as [you]_266-jim get [them]_1196-they sorted . ”_[266-jim] [My]_2959-i eyes hold [his]_266-jim . “ Sure . ”_[266-jim] [I]_2959-i watch [him]_266-jim walk back to [his]_266-jim desk and fall into conversation with [the person who sits next to [him]_266-jim]_{1199-the person who sits next to him} . [I]_2959-i ’m watching [you]_266-jim , [asshole]_2756-asshole . [I]_2959-i look around [the office]_{385-new york} with renewed determination . [I]_2959-i ’m watching all of [you]_266-jim . [Every single one]_{1202-every single one} . It ’s just now four , and [I]_2959-i email [Jameson]_186-jameson . Hi , [I]_2959-i booked [you]_266-jim a massage with a physio . [They]_1203-they will be at [your]_266-jim place at seven . Hope this suits [your]_266-jim plans . FB xoxoxo A few moments later , a reply bounces back . [Dear FB]_185-fb , Please define “ [they]_1203-they . ”_[185-fb] J xx [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes . [I]_2959-i knew this was coming . [Dear Mr. J]_127-j , [They]_1204-they . . . aka . . . [male physiotherapist professional , nonsexual - act - performing masseuse]_{1205-male physiotherapist professional , nonsexual - act - performing masseuse} . Specializes in back treatment and hella expensive . FB xoxoxo [I]_2959-i wait for a few moments , and a reply bounces back . FB , Fine , can [you]_266-jim let them into [[my]_2959-i apartment]_{766-my apartment} , please ? [I]_2959-i ’ll have [Alan]_246-alan pick [you]_266-jim up at seven . [I]_2959-i ’ll meet [you]_266-jim there , maybe fifteen minutes late . [J xox]_127-j [I]_2959-i smile broadly as hope blooms in [my]_2959-i chest . [I]_2959-i write back . Are [we]_1207-we seeing each other tonight ? [He]_246-alan replies . Yes . [I]_2959-i ’m away for the week next week , therefore , [I]_2959-i ’m taking next week ’s meetings too . See [you]_266-jim tonight . [Jay]_108-jay xox [I]_2959-i probably should play a little hard to get and pretend [I]_2959-i have something going on . . . but [I]_2959-i just do n’t have it in [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i email back . [Jay]_108-jay , [I]_2959-i ’ll make dinner . What do [you]_266-jim want ? FB xoxo A reply bounces back . The only thing [I]_2959-i want to eat tonight is [you]_266-jim . Now get back to work before [I]_2959-i bend [you]_266-jim over [your]_266-jim desk . xox [I]_2959-i smirk as [I]_2959-i feel [my]_2959-i face flush , and [I]_2959-i click out of [my]_2959-i emails . [He]_108-jay is undoubtedly [the hottest man on [earth]_872-earth]_108-jay . [I]_2959-i feel like [a master chef in [[Jameson]_186-jameson ’s fancy kitchen]_{1210-jameson ’s fancy kitchen}]_{1209-a master chef in jameson ’s fancy kitchen} . It ’s just now seven , and [I]_2959-i turn the gas on and lift the pot of water onto it . [I]_2959-i like having dinner ready for [him]_108-jay . [I]_2959-i know [he]_108-jay ’s never had it , so it feels special to do it for [him]_108-jay . The security buzzer sounds , and [I]_2959-i look around . Shit . Where ’s the intercom ? [I]_2959-i see a phone and screen near the front door . [I]_2959-i pick up . “ Hello ? ”_[2959-i] “ Hello , this is [Matthew]_139-matthew , [the physio]_139-matthew . [I]_2959-i ’m [here]_{385-new york} for a massage therapy session . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile as [I]_2959-i stare at the screen . [Matthew]_139-matthew is good looking , has the whole Scandinavian thing going on . “ Come up . ”_{[139-matthew]} [I]_2959-i push the button and release the door for [him]_139-matthew , and [he]_139-matthew disappears into [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} . Moments later , [he]_139-matthew knocks on the door . “ Hello . ”_{[139-matthew]} [I]_2959-i smile . “ Hi . ”_{[139-matthew]} [He]_139-matthew walks in wearing a white uniform and carrying a fold - up massage bed . Wow . . . [Matthew]_139-matthew is really hot . Maybe [I]_2959-i should get a massage too ? “ Where do [you]_2959-i want [me]_139-matthew to set up ? ”_{[139-matthew]} [he]_139-matthew asks . “ Umm . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown as [I]_2959-i look around . Where do [I]_2959-i want [him]_139-matthew to set up ? “ Just hang on a minute . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i walk down [the hallway]_{611-the hall} and peer into [the rooms]_{611-the hall} . There ’s [a room]_{514-the room} at the end with a treadmill and weight bench . “ Just down here at the end , please . ”_{[139-matthew]} [He]_139-matthew saunters down with [his]_139-matthew sexy walk and begins to set up . Suddenly [I]_2959-i ’m reminded that this is the exact scenario that [Jameson]_186-jameson had with [Chloe]_135-chloe . . . only [they]_1214-they really did have sex . [My]_2959-i stomach rolls at the thought . Stop it . “ [I]_2959-i ’ll be out here if [you]_2959-i need [me]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i walk nervously back out into [the kitchen]_{683-the kitchen} . Shit , is it safe to leave [him]_139-matthew down there alone ? Should [I]_2959-i be watching [him]_139-matthew or something ? [I]_2959-i peer back down [the hall]_{611-the hall} to make sure [he]_139-matthew does n’t come out of [that room]_{514-the room} and snoop around . Oh , damn it , what ’s the protocol with [strangers]_{2736-strangers} in a place like this ? The front door clicks , and [Jameson]_186-jameson comes into view . “ Hello , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson says flatly . [I]_2959-i smile . “ Hi . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i wrap [my]_2959-i arms around [him]_186-jameson . “ How ’s [[my]_2959-i man]_186-jameson ? ”_[2959-i] “ Fine . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson brushes past [me]_2959-i in a rush . Oh . [I]_2959-i frown . That ’s not the greeting [I]_2959-i was hoping for . “ Is [he]_186-jameson [here]_{385-new york} yet ? ”_[2959-i] “ Yes , in [the room]_{514-the room} down at the end . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i ’ll just have a quick shower . Can [you]_2959-i tell [him]_186-jameson [I]_2959-i ’ll be five minutes , please ? ”_[2959-i] “ Sure . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson disappears into [the bedroom]_{683-the kitchen} , and [I]_2959-i walk back down [the hall]_{611-the hall} . “ [Jameson]_186-jameson is just taking a quick shower . [He]_186-jameson will only be a few minutes . ”_[2959-i] “ Okay , thanks . ”_{[139-matthew]} [Matthew]_139-matthew smiles . [I]_2959-i walk back out into [the kitchen]_{683-the kitchen} and stir the vegetables [I]_2959-i have cooking . Maybe [I]_2959-i should have stayed at [[my]_2959-i place]_{2742-my place} tonight . [He]_186-jameson did n’t seem too pleased to see [me]_2959-i . Ten minutes later warm hands come around [my]_2959-i waist from behind , and [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s lips find [my]_2959-i temple . “ Hey , [babe]_2959-i , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson whispers softly . [I]_2959-i turn to find [him]_186-jameson with a white towel around [his]_186-jameson waist . “ Everything all right ? ”_[2959-i] “ Yeah , [I]_186-jameson ’m just really tired . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson exhales heavily . “ The last thing [I]_186-jameson feel like is a fucking massage , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson whispers as [he]_186-jameson holds [his]_186-jameson cheek to [mine]_2959-i . “ [You]_186-jameson ’ll feel much better after it , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say . “ Massage , dinner , and bed . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson rolls [his]_186-jameson eyes and trudges up [the hall]_{611-the hall} . [I]_2959-i smile as [I]_2959-i listen . Every time [Jameson]_186-jameson inhales , [he]_186-jameson gives a slight snore . [I]_2959-i ’m sitting on the couch in [my]_2959-i pajamas watching a movie , and [he]_186-jameson ’s lying with [his]_186-jameson head on [my]_2959-i lap , fast asleep . This feels strangely . . . normal . [He]_186-jameson was n’t joking when [he]_186-jameson said [he]_186-jameson was tired . [He]_186-jameson ’s more than tired — [he]_186-jameson ’s exhausted . [I]_2959-i think it ’s more mental exhaustion than physical , and [I]_2959-i ca n’t imagine what [he]_186-jameson deals with at work every day . [He]_186-jameson ’s had the pressure of running [Miles Media]_{68-miles media} from such a young age . Even in [his]_186-jameson youth , [he]_186-jameson would have been coached for this role . But [Jameson Miles the CEO]_186-jameson is a mere mortal , and [I]_2959-i feel a protective urge roll over [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i mindlessly run [my]_2959-i fingers through [his]_186-jameson hair and enjoy this close time with [him]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i do n’t imagine [many people]_{1221-many people} see [him]_186-jameson so relaxed . “ [Jay]_108-jay , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper softly . [He]_186-jameson frowns in [his]_186-jameson sleep . “ [Jay]_108-jay , bedtime , [baby]_108-jay , ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i whisper . [He]_186-jameson inhales as [he]_186-jameson stretches and blinks , as if not knowing where [he]_186-jameson is . [I]_2959-i run [my]_2959-i fingers through [his]_186-jameson hair . “ Bedtime . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile softly . [I]_2959-i get up and turn off the lights and the television , and then [he]_186-jameson takes [my]_2959-i hand and leads [me]_2959-i down [the hall]_{611-the hall} to [[his]_186-jameson bedroom]_{758-the bedroom} . [He]_186-jameson brushes [his]_186-jameson teeth and gets into bed . A few moments later , once [I]_2959-i ’m ready , [I]_2959-i climb into bed beside [him]_186-jameson , and [he]_186-jameson pulls [me]_2959-i into [his]_186-jameson arms . “ Good night , [sweetheart]_186-jameson , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson whispers as [he]_186-jameson kisses [my]_2959-i forehead . [We]_1224-we lie cheek to cheek . There ’s a closeness between [us]_1224-we that [I]_2959-i have n’t felt before . “ Good night . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snuggle against [his]_186-jameson chest . This night has been nonsexual . . . and normal . . . and weirdly intimate . [I]_2959-i may be addicted . [I]_2959-i wake to the feeling of strong hands holding [my]_2959-i inner thighs apart . [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s head is between [my]_2959-i legs , and [his]_186-jameson thick tongue swipes through [my]_2959-i sex . [My]_2959-i head throws back , and [my]_2959-i hands go to the back of [his]_186-jameson head . [My]_2959-i body is pumping with arousal , so [I]_2959-i know [he]_186-jameson ’s been at it awhile . “ Oh God , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i moan . “ Good morning , [Jay]_108-jay . ”_[2959-i] [He]_186-jameson turns [his]_186-jameson head and kisses [my]_2959-i inner thigh . “ Morning . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson bites [my]_2959-i clitoris , and [I]_2959-i close [my]_2959-i eyes . Good God . [He]_186-jameson ’s awake now and in all [his]_186-jameson glory . [He]_186-jameson continues to suck as waves of pleasure start to pulse through [me]_2959-i . [He]_186-jameson pushes three thick fingers aggressively into [my]_2959-i sex , and [I]_2959-i wince . This is [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s specialty — finger fucking [me]_2959-i with such force that [I]_2959-i orgasm before [we]_1225-we even have sex . [I]_2959-i ’ve never been with [a man who can pleasure [me]_2959-i in so many different ways]_{2829-my man} . [He]_186-jameson begins to ride [me]_2959-i , [his]_186-jameson whole hand centered on the task . [My]_2959-i legs are back to the mattress , and [God]_0-aaron . “ Oh God . . . so good , ”_[0-aaron] [I]_2959-i breathe . The sound of [my]_2959-i wet arousal echoes through [the silent room]_{1227-the silent room} as [he]_186-jameson works [me]_2959-i . [This man]_{2829-my man} is insane . Ten minutes ago [I]_2959-i was dead asleep . [He]_{2829-my man} bends and nips [my]_2959-i clitoris , and [I]_2959-i convulse as [I]_2959-i come in a rush . [My]_2959-i body lurches forward , and [he]_{2829-my man} pushes [me]_2959-i back down . “ Shh , ”_{[2829-my man]} [he]_{2829-my man} whispers as [he]_{2829-my man} calms [me]_2959-i . “ Again , ”_{[2829-my man]} [he]_{2829-my man} chants as [his]_{2829-my man} eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ No . ”_{[2829-my man]} [I]_2959-i sit up in a rush and grab [his]_{2829-my man} shoulder and pull [him]_{2829-my man} up over [me]_2959-i . [We]_1228-we kiss as [we]_1228-we fall back to the mattress , and [my]_2959-i leg wraps around [his]_{2829-my man} waist . Hell , what a way to wake up . [Our]_1228-we kiss turns frantic , and [I]_2959-i feel [his]_{2829-my man} cock nudge [my]_2959-i opening , and then [he]_{2829-my man} pauses . “ It ’s okay . [I]_{2829-my man} ’m on the pill , ”_{[2829-my man]} [I]_2959-i breathe as [I]_2959-i hold [his]_{2829-my man} face to [mine]_2959-i . [He]_{2829-my man} closes [his]_{2829-my man} eyes for a split second , and then , as if unable to relax without a condom , [he]_{2829-my man} drags [himself]_{2829-my man} off [me]_2959-i and goes to the bedside . [I]_2959-i watch as [he]_{2829-my man} tears one open and rolls it on . Then [he]_{2829-my man} ’s back on [me]_2959-i . [He]_{2829-my man} slides [home]_2289-home deep in one swift movement . [I]_2959-i cry out as [my]_2959-i sex begins to spasm around [his]_{2829-my man} thick muscle . “ Hold it , ”_{[2829-my man]} [he]_{2829-my man} growls . Fuck . . . how are [you]_1230-you supposed to hold it ? Like that ’s a thing . [He]_{2829-my man} looks down at [me]_2959-i . [His]_{2829-my man} olive skin has a sheen of perspiration , [his]_{2829-my man} blue eyes are beaming , and [I]_2959-i smile in wonder at the perfect specimen in front of [me]_2959-i . . . inside [me]_2959-i . [He]_{2829-my man} widens [his]_{2829-my man} legs and goes up unto [his]_{2829-my man} knees and then lifts [my]_2959-i legs in front of [him]_{2829-my man} by [my]_2959-i ankles and begins to pump [me]_2959-i — thick , heavy hits — and [his]_{2829-my man} jaw hangs slack as [he]_{2829-my man} watches the place [our]_1231-our bodies meet . [I]_2959-i can see every muscle in [his]_{2829-my man} torso contract as [he]_{2829-my man} pushes forward . Goddamn . . . watching [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson fuck is [the world]_{249-the world} ’s best porn . [He]_{2829-my man} picks up the pace , and [his]_{2829-my man} body goes into overdrive . [I]_2959-i scrunch the blankets beneath [me]_2959-i as [I]_2959-i feel [myself]_2959-i build . The sound of [our]_1231-our bodies slapping together echoes through [the room]_{514-the room} . [His]_{2829-my man} eyes close in ecstasy , and [he]_{2829-my man} moans as [his]_{2829-my man} body really goes to [town]_2456-town . “ [I]_{2829-my man} ’m close , ”_{[2829-my man]} [I]_2959-i whimper . “ Hold it , ”_{[2829-my man]} [he]_{2829-my man} barks as [he]_{2829-my man} pumps . “ [Jameson]_186-jameson . ”_{[2829-my man]} [He]_{2829-my man} grabs [my]_2959-i legs and puts them to one side and together , and [his]_{2829-my man} eyes flicker with arousal as [his]_{2829-my man} pumps become slow and measured . Oh . . . [[my]_2959-i man]_{2829-my man} likes it tight . [I]_2959-i clench down , and [his]_{2829-my man} head throws back . [I]_2959-i clench again , and [he]_{2829-my man} ca n’t hold it . [He]_{2829-my man} holds [himself]_{2829-my man} deep , and [I]_2959-i feel the telling jerk as [he]_{2829-my man} comes deep inside [my]_2959-i body . [He]_{2829-my man} empties [himself]_{2829-my man} , and then , knowing [I]_2959-i ca n’t come in that position , rises over [me]_2959-i and kisses [me]_2959-i as [we]_1235-we fall tender . This is what [I]_2959-i love . . . this is [my]_2959-i favorite kind of sex with [him]_{2829-my man} . Gentle , tender lovemaking . [He]_{2829-my man} holds [himself]_{2829-my man} up onto [his]_{2829-my man} elbows and kisses [me]_2959-i as [his]_{2829-my man} body gives [me]_2959-i exactly what [I]_2959-i need . [Him]_{2829-my man} . . . [I]_2959-i need all of [him]_{2829-my man} . [Our]_1235-we eyes are locked as something so beautiful runs between [us]_1235-we . [His]_{2829-my man} kiss is tender , but it ’s the look in [his]_{2829-my man} eyes that ’s turning [me]_2959-i inside out . [We]_1235-we ’re falling for each other . This is not casual sex ; this is n’t even sex . This is the ultimate lovemaking . “ [Jay]_108-jay , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pant as [my]_2959-i eyes search [his]_{2829-my man} . “ [I]_{2829-my man} know , [baby]_108-jay , ”_{[2829-my man]} [he]_{2829-my man} whispers . [I]_2959-i grip [his]_{2829-my man} shoulders , and [he]_{2829-my man} holds [himself]_{2829-my man} deep , and [my]_2959-i body contracts around [his]_{2829-my man} . [His]_{2829-my man} lips take [mine]_2959-i , and [our]_1235-we kiss is slow and unhurried and everything [I]_2959-i ’ve never had . [He]_{2829-my man} slowly finishes [me]_2959-i and then drops to the mattress beside [me]_2959-i and rolls [me]_2959-i to face [him]_{2829-my man} . [We]_1235-we look at each other , and [I]_2959-i ’m overwhelmed with a feeling of closeness . [I]_2959-i stare at [his]_{2829-my man} beautiful face , and [I]_2959-i smile softly . “ [I]_2959-i feel like — ”_[2959-i] “ Do n’t . ”_{[2829-my man]} [He]_{2829-my man} cuts [me]_2959-i off . “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ Do n’t ruin this . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ’m at a loss by what [he]_{2829-my man} means . “ How would [I]_2959-i ruin this ? ”_[2959-i] “ Do n’t fall in love with [me]_{2829-my man} , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_{[2829-my man]} What the hell ? [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_{2829-my man} . “ Why not ? ”_[2959-i] “ Because [we]_2879-we ’re not like that . Get that through [your]_186-jameson head . Right now . ”_{[2829-my man]} [He]_{2829-my man} gets up in a rush and walks into [the bathroom]_{300-the bathroom} and closes the door . It shuts with a sharp snap . [I]_2959-i roll onto [my]_2959-i back and stare at the ceiling . [I]_2959-i was going to say that [I]_2959-i felt like that was the best alarm clock of all time . Love was just an afterthought . Chapter 15 [I]_2959-i get out of bed and storm into [the bathroom]_{300-the bathroom} . [I]_2959-i find [him]_{2829-my man} under the shower . “ For the record , [Jameson]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap , “ [I]_{2829-my man} was going to tell [you]_186-jameson that [you]_186-jameson should wake [me]_{2829-my man} up like that every day . ”_{[2829-my man]} [He]_{2829-my man} narrows [his]_{2829-my man} eyes in anger . “ It seems to [me]_{2829-my man} that [the only person who ’s thinking about love around here]_{2880-the only person who ’s thinking about love around here} is [you]_186-jameson . ”_{[2829-my man]} [He]_{2829-my man} rolls [his]_{2829-my man} eyes as [he]_{2829-my man} soaps [his]_{2829-my man} groin . [His]_{2829-my man} eye - rolling infuriates [me]_2959-i . “ So do n’t turn this around and push [me]_{2829-my man} away because [you]_186-jameson are falling in love with [me]_{2829-my man} ! ”_{[2829-my man]} [I]_2959-i do n’t know what to say next , so [I]_2959-i storm out . [I]_2959-i grab [my]_2959-i bag and head down to one of [the other bathrooms]_{1237-the other bathrooms} to shower . [I]_2959-i ’m not getting in with [him]_{2829-my man} . Stupid jerk . Half an hour later , [I]_2959-i walk out into [the kitchen]_{758-the bedroom} to see [Mr. Miles the CEO]_{79-mr. miles} — gray suit , white shirt , and cranky controlled persona firmly back in place . “ Are [you]_186-jameson ready ? ”_{[79-mr. miles]} “ Ah . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i look around . “ [I]_2959-i ’ll just get [my]_2959-i things . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i go into [the bedroom]_{758-the bedroom} and glance at [myself]_2959-i in the mirror . [I]_2959-i ’m wearing [his]_{2829-my man} favorite outfit today , and [he]_{2829-my man} did n’t even notice . Well . . . poof to [him]_{2829-my man} . [Damn control freak]_{1239-damn control freak} is pissing [me]_2959-i off . [I]_2959-i walk back out with [my]_2959-i overnight bag over [my]_2959-i shoulder . “ Let ’s go . ”_{[2829-my man]} [His]_{2829-my man} brow furrows when [he]_{2829-my man} sees what [I]_2959-i ’m carrying . “ What are [you]_{2829-my man} doing with that bag ? Just get it later . ”_{[2829-my man]} “ [I]_{2829-my man} ’ll take it to work with [me]_{2829-my man} . That ’s fine . ”_{[2829-my man]} [My]_2959-i eyes hold [his]_{2829-my man} . “ [I]_{2829-my man} have a lot going on this week . ”_{[2829-my man]} [His]_{2829-my man} jaw clenches as [he]_{2829-my man} glares at [me]_2959-i . “ Good . ”_{[2829-my man]} [He]_{2829-my man} turns and walks out , and [I]_2959-i smirk . [I]_2959-i let [you]_1240-you have the control for the last few days , [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} , but do n’t misjudge [my]_2959-i submission as a weakness . [I]_2959-i will not beg for [any man to love [me]_2959-i]_{1241-any man to love me} , [CEO billionaire with blue eyes or not]_{1242-ceo billionaire with blue eyes or not} . Do n’t wreck it . [I]_2959-i know [I]_2959-i told [him]_{1242-ceo billionaire with blue eyes or not} [I]_2959-i want [friends]_394-friends with benefits . . . but the rules have changed . For [me]_2959-i , anyway . [We]_1244-we get into [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} , and [I]_2959-i stare straight ahead . [I]_2959-i can feel the animosity oozing out of [him]_{1242-ceo billionaire with blue eyes or not} . Part of [me]_2959-i hates that [I]_2959-i ’m letting [him]_{1242-ceo billionaire with blue eyes or not} get worked up before [he]_{1242-ceo billionaire with blue eyes or not} even starts for the day , but screw it . [I]_2959-i ca n’t spend [my]_2959-i life tiptoeing around [his]_{1242-ceo billionaire with blue eyes or not} stress levels . [We]_1244-we walk out through [the foyer]_{678-the limo} , and [the limo]_{678-the limo} is parked and waiting . [Alan]_246-alan is standing next to the door . “ Hello , [Alan]_246-alan . ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i smile as [we]_1244-we approach as if [I]_2959-i do n’t have a care in [the world]_{249-the world} . [Alan]_246-alan smiles and nods in acknowledgment . [Jameson]_186-jameson stays silent . [He]_186-jameson holds [his]_186-jameson hand out for [me]_2959-i to get in first . [I]_2959-i climb in and shuffle over the seat , and [Jameson]_186-jameson gets in beside [me]_2959-i . A folded newspaper sits on the seat , and [I]_2959-i pick it up and begin to read . [Jameson]_186-jameson stares at [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i know it ’s [his]_186-jameson paper . Well , too bad — [I]_2959-i got it first . For ten minutes , [I]_2959-i read in silence . There is none of [my]_2959-i fake news today . Hmm . [I]_2959-i wonder if this has a correlation to [me]_2959-i not having it to [Hayden]_266-jim by four yesterday . [I]_2959-i think about it for a moment . [I]_2959-i ’m going to test this theory today . [I]_2959-i ’ll have a story to [him]_266-jim by three and see what happens . “ What are [you]_266-jim doing tonight ? ”_[266-jim] [he]_266-jim asks . “ [I]_2959-i ’m going out with [Ava]_77-ava , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i lie as [I]_2959-i pass the paper to [him]_266-jim . “ [I]_2959-i told [you]_266-jim [I]_2959-i did n’t want [you]_266-jim going clubbing with [her]_77-ava . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . The nerve of this control freak . “ What [I]_2959-i do when [I]_2959-i ’m not with [you]_266-jim is none of [your]_266-jim business , [Jameson]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] “ So now [you]_266-jim ’re going to be all dramatic ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes . “ Will [you]_266-jim just stop . ”_[2959-i] “ Stop what ? ”_[266-jim] [My]_2959-i eyes hold [his]_266-jim . “ [I]_2959-i ’m not in love with [you]_266-jim . So . . . [you]_266-jim can stop worrying that [I]_2959-i am . [I]_2959-i enjoy [your]_266-jim company , but [you]_266-jim obviously have a hang - up about someone caring for [you]_266-jim and mistake it for love . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes . “ It ’s all a bit too hard , to be honest . ”_[266-jim] [His]_266-jim jaw clenches , and [I]_2959-i know [he]_266-jim ’s fuming on the inside . “ What does that mean ? ”_[266-jim] “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ That it ’s too hard . ”_[2959-i] “ It means go and find [someone else]_{433-someone else} not to fall in love with [you]_266-jim . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug . “ [I]_2959-i ’m fine with that . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_266-jim ’re fine with that ? ”_[266-jim] [he]_266-jim whispers angrily . “ So if [I]_2959-i went and had sex with [someone else]_{433-someone else} tonight , [you]_266-jim ’d be fine with that ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown as [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_266-jim . What the hell is going on in that head of [his]_266-jim ? [I]_2959-i drag [my]_2959-i hand down [my]_2959-i face . “ [Jameson]_186-jameson , for fuck ’s sake . What do [you]_266-jim want from [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_266-jim do n’t know , ”_[266-jim] [he]_266-jim snaps . “ Fine . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i blow out a deep breath . “ Let ’s leave it at that , then . ”_[2959-i] “ What does that mean ? ”_[2959-i] “ [My]_2959-i God , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap in exasperation . “ For [a smart man]_{2883-a smart man} , [you]_{2883-a smart man} ’re being really stupid . [I]_266-jim ca n’t help [you]_{2883-a smart man} work out what [you]_{2883-a smart man} want from [me]_266-jim , [Jameson]_186-jameson . ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim stares at [me]_2959-i . “ One minute [you]_{2883-a smart man} ’re telling [me]_266-jim not to ruin it by falling in love with [you]_{2883-a smart man} , and the next minute [you]_{2883-a smart man} ’re telling [me]_266-jim [you]_{2883-a smart man} do n’t want [me]_266-jim going out without [you]_{2883-a smart man} . ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim sits back in [his]_266-jim seat , affronted . “ [I]_266-jim want [a close friend]_{2884-a close friend} to have sex with . [We]_2885-we talked about this . It seems to [me]_266-jim that [the only person breaking the rules here]_{2886-the only person breaking the rules here} is [you]_{2883-a smart man} . Why are [you]_{2883-a smart man} even thinking about love ? ”_[266-jim] “ Do n’t turn this on [me]_266-jim , ”_[266-jim] [he]_266-jim whispers angrily . “ All right , then , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . “ Can [you]_{2883-a smart man} look [me]_266-jim in the eye and tell [me]_266-jim that [you]_{2883-a smart man} have no feelings for [me]_266-jim ? ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim rolls [his]_266-jim eyes in disgust . “ Can [you]_{2883-a smart man} ? ”_[266-jim] “ Of course [I]_2959-i can . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i look [him]_266-jim straight in the eye . “ Do it , then . ”_[2959-i] “ What ? ”_[266-jim] “ Tell [me]_266-jim that [you]_{2883-a smart man} do n’t have feelings for [me]_266-jim . Tell [me]_266-jim [you]_{2883-a smart man} have never thought of [me]_266-jim once over the last year and that [you]_{2883-a smart man} never kept [my]_266-jim scarf . ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim narrows [his]_266-jim eyes in anger . “ Like [I]_2959-i thought , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i huff as [I]_2959-i turn [my]_2959-i attention back out the window . “ [I]_266-jim wondered how long it would be until [that snarky bitch]_{2887-that snarky bitch} reared [her]_{2887-that snarky bitch} ugly head , ”_[266-jim] [he]_266-jim mutters under [his]_266-jim breath . “ [Ha]_163-ha , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i huff . “ At least [that bitch]_{2887-that snarky bitch} knows what [she]_{2887-that snarky bitch} wants . ”_[2959-i] “ And what ’s that ? ”_[266-jim] [he]_266-jim sneers . “ [A man]_{2300-a man} ; that ’s what [she]_{2887-that snarky bitch} wants — one who is n’t afraid of [his]_266-jim feelings . ”_[266-jim] “ Go to hell , ”_[266-jim] [he]_266-jim whispers . “ Just stop talking . [You]_{2300-a man} ’re stressing [me]_2959-i the fuck out with all [your]_{2300-a man} shit . If [I]_2959-i wanted [a psychiatrist]_{2889-a psychiatrist} , [I]_2959-i would date one . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smirk as [I]_2959-i look out the window . “ [We]_2890-we ’re not dating , [Jameson]_186-jameson . [We]_2890-we ’re just fucking . Get it right . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_{2300-a man} go out with [Ava]_77-ava trolling for [men]_330-men tonight , and [we]_2890-we wo n’t even be doing that . ”_[2959-i] “ Excuse [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap as [my]_2959-i anger starts to simmer . “ [You]_{2300-a man} ca n’t tell [me]_2959-i what to do . ”_[2959-i] [His]_2959-i eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ [I]_2959-i can . And [I]_2959-i just did . ”_[2959-i] “ [Jameson]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pause as [I]_2959-i try to think of a calm and intelligent reply . “ [I]_2959-i would never sleep with someone behind [your]_{2300-a man} back — [you]_{2300-a man} know that . But [you]_{2300-a man} ca n’t tell [me]_2959-i where [I]_2959-i ’m allowed to go . Even if [you]_{2300-a man} loved [me]_2959-i , which [you]_{2300-a man} do n’t , [I]_2959-i would n’t allow [you]_{2300-a man} to dictate what [I]_2959-i can do . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_{369-the car} mean it . ”_{[369-the car]} “ Go to hell . ”_[2959-i] [The car]_{369-the car} pulls up around the corner at [my]_2959-i spot where [I]_2959-i get out , and [I]_2959-i open the door in a rush . “ [I]_{369-the car} ’ll see [you]_{2300-a man} tonight , ”_{[369-the car]} [he]_{369-the car} snaps as [I]_2959-i climb out . [I]_2959-i lean back into [the car]_{369-the car} . “ Yeah , wait for [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i ’ll be there when hell freezes over . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i slam the door in a rush . [The limo]_{678-the limo} pulls out and slowly drives down [the road]_{533-the road} toward [the Miles Media building]_{521-the miles media building} , and [I]_2959-i inhale to try to calm [my]_2959-i furiously beating heart . [Stupid fucking jerk]_{1252-stupid fucking jerk} . “ Wonder what this is about ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly frowns as [she]_198-molly reads the news from [her]_198-molly computer . “ What what ’s about ? ”_[198-molly] [I]_2959-i reply as [I]_2959-i type . “ It says here that [Miles Media]_{14-miles media} is having crisis meetings today with [shareholders]_{2892-shareholders} and that more meetings are scheduled in [London]_6-london next week . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i heart drops ; [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s going to [London]_6-london next week . “ What ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [She]_198-molly turns [her]_198-molly computer screen to face [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i read the financial reviews story on the Miles Media stock prices slump . [I]_2959-i lean [my]_2959-i face onto [my]_2959-i hand as [I]_2959-i read on . God . . . what a nightmare . [I]_2959-i look over and see [Jake]_108-jay laughing with one of [the girls in [her]_198-molly cubicle]_{1253-the girls in her cubicle} as if [he]_108-jay does n’t have a care in [the world]_{249-the world} . What is that stupid idiot doing ? Is [he]_108-jay even investigating the damn case at all ? [Ugh]_61-ugh , honestly , [I]_2959-i think [he]_108-jay ’s [the wrong man for the job]_108-jay . No investigating seems to be getting done , although [I]_2959-i ’m sure [he]_108-jay has the phone numbers of [every single girl on the floor]_{1255-every single girl on the floor} . Should [I]_2959-i tell [him]_108-jay [my]_2959-i thoughts about [Hayden]_266-jim ? No , it ’s only a hunch with no real evidence . [I]_2959-i ’m testing the theory today . Screw this . [I]_2959-i ’ll have to find out who ’s doing this [myself]_2959-i . It ’s obvious [Jake]_108-jay has no frigging idea . From the corner of [my]_2959-i eye , [I]_2959-i see [people]_248-people scurry back to [their]_248-people desks , and [I]_2959-i glance up to see [Jameson]_186-jameson and [Tristan]_2430-tristan walking through the floor . [Tristan]_2430-tristan smiles and talks to [people]_248-people as [he]_2430-tristan walks along . [Jameson]_186-jameson stays solemn , in all [his]_186-jameson cranky gorgeousness . [His]_186-jameson back is ramrod straight , and [his]_186-jameson face is so damn kissable it hurts . [You]_1257-you ’re angry with [him]_186-jameson . . . remember , [fool]_306-fool ? Look away , look away . [I]_2959-i go back to [my]_2959-i computer , but then [I]_2959-i see out of the corner of [my]_2959-i eye the familiar gray suit . [I]_2959-i look up to find [Jameson]_186-jameson standing next to [my]_2959-i desk . “ Hello , [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i fake a smile . [His]_186-jameson eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ Hello . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Can [I]_186-jameson help [you]_186-jameson , [sir]_186-jameson ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Where is [Jake]_108-jay ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson says through gritted teeth . “ [Jake]_108-jay would be flirting somewhere in [the office]_{385-new york} , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say quietly . “ Look for [a good - looking woman]_{2894-a good - looking woman} , and [you]_186-jameson will find [him]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i point in the direction of [Jake]_108-jay with [my]_2959-i pen . [Jameson]_186-jameson inhales sharply as [he]_186-jameson glares over at [Jake]_108-jay as [he]_186-jameson talks to [a blonde]_{1259-a blonde} , completely unaware that [he]_186-jameson is being watched . [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s eyes flick to [Tristan]_2430-tristan , and [they]_1260-they both give a subtle shake of [their]_1260-they heads . “ [Tristan]_2430-tristan , [I]_2959-i was wondering if [I]_2959-i can see [you]_2430-tristan for a few moments at some point this afternoon , please ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ Yes , of course . Come up in half an hour . ”_[2959-i] [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s eyes stay fixed on [me]_2959-i for a beat longer than necessary , as if [he]_186-jameson ’s waiting for [me]_2959-i to say something . [I]_2959-i smile warmly as [I]_2959-i hide [my]_2959-i anger . Maybe [he]_186-jameson ’s right , and [I]_2959-i really am [a bitch]_{2519-a bitch} . “ Bye . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Goodbye , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson says as [he]_186-jameson turns and walks over toward [Jake]_108-jay . [I]_2959-i smile as [I]_2959-i watch the moment [Jake]_108-jay sees [him]_108-jay coming and how fast [he]_108-jay jumps up from the corner of that desk . [Jameson]_186-jameson says something to [him]_108-jay , and then [I]_2959-i watch as [Jake]_108-jay is marched to [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} . [I]_2959-i hope [they]_1263-they fire [him]_108-jay . [He]_108-jay ’s definitely not worried about the enormity of this case . Forty minutes later , [I]_2959-i knock on [Tristan]_2430-tristan ’s door . “ Come in , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson calls . “ Hello . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . “ Hi , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson gestures to [his]_186-jameson desk . “ Come take a seat . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sit down . “ [I]_2959-i just wanted to keep [you]_186-jameson updated on something that happened yesterday that felt out of the ordinary . ”_[2959-i] “ Great , okay . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson holds [his]_186-jameson pen in [his]_186-jameson hands . “ What is it ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [Hayden]_266-jim came and asked [me]_186-jameson for [my]_186-jameson stories early . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson frowns as [he]_186-jameson listens . “ It felt weird that [he]_186-jameson needed [them]_2895-them early . So . . . [I]_186-jameson lied and said it was n’t ready yet . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ And ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ And there was no fake news today . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson narrows [his]_186-jameson eyes . “ [I]_186-jameson do n’t know if [I]_186-jameson ’m grasping at straws , but it kind of felt like the fake news stories only go to print if [they]_2895-them are in by a certain time . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Interesting . That ’s great work . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson thinks for a moment . “ Hold the story back today so [we]_1264-our can test the theory , and [I]_2959-i will start to dig up some info on [Hayden]_266-jim . Good work . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stand . “ Is everything all right ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson asks . “ Yes , why ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson eyes hold [mine]_2959-i for a beat , and [I]_2959-i know that [Jameson]_186-jameson has said something about [our]_1264-our fight this morning . “ Just checking . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Everything ’s great . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Good . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ See [you]_186-jameson later . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i bounce out of [the office]_{385-new york} like [I]_2959-i do n’t have a care in [the world]_{249-the world} . It ’s late Friday night , and [I]_2959-i stare at the television , [my]_2959-i mind in a blurred haze . [I]_2959-i have n’t heard from [Jameson]_186-jameson since [our]_1264-our fight on Wednesday morning . [I]_2959-i ’ve seen [him]_186-jameson in passing at work , but that ’s all . Maybe that ’s it — maybe [I]_2959-i wo n’t see [him]_186-jameson again . On Wednesday , the romantic in [me]_2959-i was convinced [he]_186-jameson had real feelings for [me]_2959-i and that [he]_186-jameson would come back begging . On Thursday , [I]_2959-i decided that [the man]_186-jameson has deep emotional flaws if [he]_186-jameson could n’t see [he]_186-jameson had feelings for [me]_2959-i . Today . . . [I]_2959-i wonder if [I]_2959-i meant anything at all . Maybe [I]_2959-i ’ve looked at the whole thing through rose - colored glasses ? All along [he]_186-jameson ’s given [me]_2959-i signs , and like [a fool]_{1267-a fool} , [I]_2959-i ’ve ignored [every one of [them]_1269-them]_{1268-every one of them} . [He]_186-jameson leaves for [London]_6-london on Monday , [I]_2959-i think — not that [I]_2959-i would know if [his]_186-jameson plans have changed . [My]_2959-i mind goes back to the flight where [we]_1270-we met , and now that [I]_2959-i know the life that [he]_186-jameson leads . . . [I]_2959-i can see it all so clearly . [He]_186-jameson did n’t ask for [my]_2959-i number because [he]_186-jameson did n’t want anything — [he]_186-jameson even said that was the reason why . But [I]_2959-i never thought that [he]_186-jameson actually meant [he]_186-jameson did n’t want anything . [I]_2959-i thought there was an ulterior motive and that was just the lie [he]_186-jameson used to cover it . Maybe [some people]_{1271-some people} are just wired never to want more . Or maybe [he]_186-jameson just has n’t met [the right person]_{1272-the right person} yet . So many maybes . [My]_2959-i door buzzes , and [I]_2959-i frown and get up and push the button . “ Hello . ”_[2959-i] “ Hey . ”_{[186-jameson]} The voice is distorted . “ Who is it ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ It ’s [me]_186-jameson , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson pants . “ [Jameson]_186-jameson ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [You]_186-jameson expecting [someone else]_{433-someone else} ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson says , obviously annoyed . [I]_2959-i smile , buzz [him]_186-jameson in , and run into [the bedroom]_{758-the bedroom} to take off [my]_2959-i ragged nightdress that has hot chocolate spilled down the front of it . [I]_2959-i flap [my]_2959-i arms around in a panic and grab a towel off the rack . [I]_2959-i wrap it around [my]_2959-i chest as if [I]_2959-i just got out of the shower . It ’s a lot better than a soiled nightdress with dancing teddy bears on it . Why [[my]_2959-i grandma]_{1274-my grandma} thinks dancing teddies is something [I]_2959-i need , [I]_2959-i ’ll never know . A knock sounds at the door , and [I]_2959-i open it in a rush . And there [he]_186-jameson stands . Piercing blue eyes greet [me]_2959-i . [He]_186-jameson ’s wet with perspiration and panting . [My]_2959-i face falls . “ Did [you]_2959-i run all the way here ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson nods . [He]_186-jameson has a melancholy feeling oozing out of [him]_186-jameson . “ Are [you]_2959-i all right ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i ask . [He]_186-jameson shrugs , and [his]_186-jameson eyes search [mine]_2959-i . “ [Jay]_108-jay , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper as [my]_2959-i heart melts . [I]_2959-i take [him]_186-jameson in [my]_2959-i arms and hold [him]_186-jameson tight . [He]_186-jameson clings to [me]_2959-i as if [his]_186-jameson life depends on it . [We]_1275-we stand in [each other]_{2339-each other} ’s arms for a long time ; no words are needed . At this moment , [he]_186-jameson needs [me]_2959-i . “ Did the ax murderer chase [you]_186-jameson here ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper up against [his]_186-jameson cheek . [He]_186-jameson smiles and grips [me]_2959-i tighter . “ Maybe . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [I]_2959-i paid [him]_186-jameson to do that . ”_[2959-i] “ Witch . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson smirks . “ Come on , let ’s get [you]_186-jameson in the shower . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i take [his]_186-jameson hand and lead [him]_186-jameson into [the bathroom]_{300-the bathroom} and turn on the shower and take [his]_186-jameson shirt off over [his]_186-jameson head . [His]_186-jameson eyes darken , and [I]_2959-i slowly slide [his]_186-jameson track pants down [his]_186-jameson legs . “ [I]_186-jameson ’ve had the worst few days , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson murmurs . [I]_2959-i nod as [I]_2959-i slide [his]_186-jameson briefs down [his]_186-jameson legs . “ [I]_2959-i know , [baby]_186-jameson . This work nightmare will be over soon . ”_[2959-i] “ It has nothing to do with work . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ What ’s it got to do with ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson eyes hold [mine]_2959-i , and [he]_186-jameson swallows the lump in [his]_186-jameson throat . “ [You]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i smile softly as [my]_2959-i heart free - falls from [my]_2959-i chest . “ [You]_186-jameson missed [me]_186-jameson ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson nods as if [he]_186-jameson ’s feeling stupid . [I]_2959-i kiss [him]_186-jameson and hold [his]_186-jameson face in [my]_2959-i hands . “ [I]_2959-i missed [you]_186-jameson , too , [you]_186-jameson big dope . ”_[2959-i] “ But [you]_186-jameson said — ”_[2959-i] “ Do n’t worry about what [that snarky bitch]_186-jameson said . [She]_2897-her ’s off [her]_2897-her chops . Pay [her]_2897-her no attention . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson smirks as [his]_186-jameson hands drop to [my]_2959-i behind . “ Off [her]_2897-her chops ? What the hell does that even mean , [Emily]_186-jameson ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i giggle . “ When snarky bitches go crazy , [they]_2898-they go off [their]_2898-they chops . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson chuckles and holds [me]_2959-i close and inhales deeply into [my]_2959-i hair as if [he]_186-jameson ’s relieved . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t know what ’s going on between [us]_2899-us , [Jay]_108-jay . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i hesitate as [I]_2959-i try to articulate what [I]_2959-i want to say . “ But [you]_186-jameson can depend on [me]_2959-i . Do n’t be scared of [us]_2899-us . Because [I]_2959-i ’m not . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_186-jameson should be , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson fires back . “ Why would [I]_186-jameson be scared of [someone who makes [me]_186-jameson feel the way [you]_186-jameson make [me]_186-jameson feel]_{2900-someone who makes me feel the way you make me feel} ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson face softens , and [he]_186-jameson dusts [my]_2959-i bottom lip with [his]_186-jameson thumb . “ It ’s been a long few days without [you]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i smile softly . [I]_2959-i love [him]_186-jameson when [he]_186-jameson ’s like this . “ Get in the shower , and wash away the last week , and stay with [me]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson kiss deepens , and [I]_2959-i feel [his]_186-jameson erection begin to grow up against [my]_2959-i stomach . [He]_186-jameson pulls off the towel and leads [me]_2959-i into the shower by the hand and pushes [me]_2959-i up against the wall . [We]_1278-we kiss like [we]_1278-we ’ve been starved of each other . [[My]_2959-i man]_{2829-my man} [Jim]_266-jim is back . . . and [I]_2959-i feel like [we]_1278-we just jumped over some invisible hurdle between [us]_1278-we . What exactly that is [I]_2959-i just do n’t know , but [I]_2959-i feel if [I]_2959-i can bring [Jim]_266-jim to [me]_2959-i for long enough for things to become real between [us]_1278-we , maybe [I]_2959-i can help [Jameson]_186-jameson get some kind of work - life balance . Monday morning [Jay]_108-jay holds [me]_2959-i tight in [his]_108-jay arms as [we]_1278-we say [our]_1278-we goodbyes . [He]_108-jay goes to [London]_6-london for a week today . [He]_108-jay has meetings all week . [We]_1278-we ’ve had the most amazing weekend . [We]_1278-we stayed here at [[my]_2959-i apartment]_{766-my apartment} the entire time . [I]_2959-i ’ve cooked for [us]_1278-we , [we]_1278-we ’ve made love and watched movies , and [we]_1278-we even went for a run . Not [a cranky CEO]_{2388-the ceo} in sight . [We]_1278-we went back to [[his]_108-jay place]_{385-new york} last night to pack [his]_108-jay bag , and even then , [we]_1278-we came back [here]_{385-new york} to [[my]_2959-i house]_{2529-your house} to sleep . [I]_2959-i feel that when [he]_108-jay ’s here at [[my]_2959-i house]_{2529-your house} , [he]_108-jay ’s able to detach from being [Jameson]_186-jameson Miles [the CEO]_{2388-the ceo} and just be [a regular man]_{1284-a regular man} . . . [[my]_2959-i man]_{2829-my man} . [He]_{2829-my man} can forget who [he]_{2829-my man} is for a while and what is expected of [him]_{2829-my man} . The dynamic has shifted between [us]_1278-we . [I]_2959-i do n’t know how to stop it , but [I]_2959-i ’m falling for [him]_{2829-my man} . [I]_2959-i can feel [myself]_2959-i slipping under the water , [his]_{2829-my man} water . . . the beautiful spell of [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson . “ No layovers , okay ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [He]_{2829-my man} smiles as [we]_1278-we kiss . “ No talking to [girls who get upgraded]_{2901-girls who get upgraded} . ”_{[2829-my man]} [He]_{2829-my man} grabs [my]_2959-i behind . “ Stop talking , wench . ”_{[2829-my man]} [I]_2959-i grip [him]_{2829-my man} tighter . “ Oh . [I]_{2829-my man} hate the thought of a week without [you]_{2829-my man} . ”_{[2829-my man]} [He]_{2829-my man} kisses [me]_2959-i again but remains silent . “ Will [you]_{2829-my man} say something ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ Say something sweet to put [me]_{2829-my man} out of [my]_{2829-my man} misery . ”_{[2829-my man]} [His]_{2829-my man} eyes come to [mine]_2959-i as [he]_{2829-my man} cups [my]_2959-i face . “ [I]_2959-i packed [your]_{2829-my man} scarf in [my]_2959-i luggage . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile softly . “ It ’s nothing new . [I]_2959-i ’ve taken it on every trip [I]_2959-i ’ve been on . . . since [we]_2902-we met . ”_[2959-i] A wave of unexpected emotion overwhelms [me]_2959-i , and [my]_2959-i eyes fill with tears . [I]_2959-i blink them away in the hope [he]_{2829-my man} does n’t see . “ [You]_{2829-my man} have ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [He]_{2829-my man} nods and kisses [me]_2959-i as [he]_{2829-my man} holds [my]_2959-i face , and it ’s tender and perfect and [God]_0-aaron , [I]_2959-i just want to blurt out that maybe [I]_2959-i really do love [him]_{2829-my man} for real now . But [I]_2959-i wo n’t , because then [I]_2959-i will ruin it . Whatever this is . [I]_2959-i lie in bed and aimlessly scroll through Instagram , but [my]_2959-i mind is anything but on [my]_2959-i feed . [Jameson]_186-jameson is [my]_2959-i focus . [I]_2959-i ’ve missed [him]_{2829-my man} this week , but [I]_2959-i know [he]_{2829-my man} ’s missed [me]_2959-i too . Even with all [his]_{2829-my man} meetings and stress over there , [he]_{2829-my man} has kept in constant touch . Hopefully when [he]_{2829-my man} gets back , [we]_1286-we can decipher what ’s really going on here . [My]_2959-i phone rings , and the letter [J]_127-j lights up [my]_2959-i screen . “ Hello . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . “ Hey there , ”_{[2829-my man]} [his]_{2829-my man} deep velvety voice purrs down the line . “ How ’s [[my]_{2829-my man} man]_{2829-my man} ? ”_{[2829-my man]} “ Good , busy . How are [you]_{2829-my man} ? ”_{[2829-my man]} “ Lonely . ”_[1287-we] [We]_1287-we ’ve spoken every day since [he]_{2829-my man} ’s been gone . . . twice a day , actually . [He]_{2829-my man} chuckles . “ [You]_{2829-my man} did n’t look too lonely last night in that Skype session . ”_{[2829-my man]} [I]_2959-i feel [my]_2959-i face flush . [We]_1287-we ’ve been sexting [each other]_{2339-each other} every night , and last night [I]_2959-i may have given [him]_{2829-my man} a little vibrator show . The look on [his]_{2829-my man} face was one of pure pleasure . [I]_2959-i clench [my]_2959-i sex just thinking about the way [he]_{2829-my man} was pulling [himself]_{2829-my man} as [he]_{2829-my man} watched [me]_2959-i . [God]_0-aaron . . . deviants . “ What ’s going on today , [sweetheart]_2959-i ? ”_{[2829-my man]} [he]_{2829-my man} asks . [My]_2959-i stomach flips every time [he]_{2829-my man} calls [me]_2959-i that ; it will never grow old . “ Working . ”_{[2829-my man]} [I]_2959-i try not to talk about work with [him]_{2829-my man} . [I]_2959-i want to keep [our]_1287-we relationship as separated as [I]_2959-i can . “ What are [you]_2959-i up to ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i ’m just about to go out to dinner with [Elliot]_140-elliot . [He]_140-elliot ’s introducing [me]_2959-i to [some girl [he]_140-elliot ’s met]_{2903-some girl he ’s met} . ”_[2959-i] “ Really ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . “ Has [he]_140-elliot fallen in love ? ”_[2959-i] “ God , no . [He]_140-elliot falls in lust every week , though . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i giggle . “ Are [you]_2959-i going out tonight ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes . “ No , [Jay]_108-jay ; relax , will [you]_108-jay ? ”_[0-aaron] [God]_0-aaron , [he]_0-aaron ’s frigging traumatized from that night [I]_2959-i was dancing with [the blond god]_0-aaron . “ It ’s hard to relax when [I]_2959-i know how gorgeous [you]_108-jay are on the other side of [the world]_{249-the world} all alone . ”_[2959-i] “ Well , in four more days [you]_108-jay ’ll be back . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i glance at [my]_2959-i watch . “ [I]_2959-i ’ve got to go . [I]_2959-i ’m going to miss [[my]_2959-i bus]_{2905-my bus} . ”_[2959-i] “ Okay . [I]_0-aaron ’ll let [you]_108-jay go . Have a nice day , [babe]_0-aaron . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron sighs . “ [You]_108-jay too , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [He]_0-aaron lingers on the line . Even on the other side of [the world]_{249-the world} , [he]_0-aaron has an effect on [me]_2959-i . [He]_0-aaron ’s waiting for [me]_2959-i to tell [him]_0-aaron [I]_2959-i ’m missing [him]_0-aaron . . . [he]_0-aaron always does . “ [I]_2959-i ’m missing [you]_0-aaron . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . “ [Me]_2959-i too . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i ’ll speak to [you]_0-aaron tonight . ”_[2959-i] “ Okay . Bye . ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly and [I]_2959-i ’ve just been out for dinner , and [she]_198-molly ’s driving [me]_2959-i [home]_2289-home . [Her]_198-molly phone rings through the Bluetooth in [[her]_198-molly car]_{369-the car} . The name [Michael]_60-michael lights up the screen . “ Hello , ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly answers . “ Oh [[my]_198-molly God]_{2363-my god} , [Molly]_198-molly . [I]_198-molly need [your]_198-molly help . ”_[198-molly] “ What ’s wrong ? ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly stammers as [she]_198-molly slows [the car]_{369-the car} down . [Michael]_60-michael is [[her]_198-molly ex - husband]_{562-her ex - husband} ; [my]_2959-i eyes widen as [I]_2959-i listen . “ [I]_60-michael took something , and now [I]_60-michael ’m driving , and [I]_60-michael just passed out , and [[my]_60-michael car]_{369-the car} hit a guardrail . ”_[60-michael] “ What ? ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly cries as [she]_198-molly pulls [the car]_{369-the car} over to the side . “ [I]_198-molly feel so dizzy . ”_[198-molly] “ Holy shit , tell [me]_198-molly where [you]_198-molly are ! ”_[198-molly] “ [I]_198-molly ’m on the interstate near [the garage]_{2907-the garage} [we]_2908-we get gas from . ”_[198-molly] “ Okay , [I]_198-molly ’m on [my]_198-molly way . ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly does a U - turn and starts speeding in the other direction . [She]_198-molly ’s driving like a bat out of hell , and [I]_2959-i hold on for dear life . “ Do [you]_198-molly know mouth to mouth ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ No . ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly shrugs . “ Maybe a little bit . Can [you]_198-molly google passing out for [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i start to google . “ Should [we]_2908-we just call [an ambulance]_{2909-an ambulance} ? ”_[2959-i] “ Maybe . ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly looks between [me]_2959-i and [the road]_{533-the road} ; [she]_198-molly calls [him]_2959-i back . “ Hello , ”_[2959-i] [he]_2959-i says in a meek voice . “ Are [you]_198-molly okay ? ”_[2959-i] “ Yes . ”_[198-molly] “ Should [I]_198-molly call [an ambulance]_{2909-an ambulance} ? ”_[198-molly] “ No , ”_[2959-i] [he]_2959-i snaps . “ Just get [here]_{385-new york} . ”_[2959-i] Five minutes later [we]_1294-we pull up behind [[his]_2959-i parked car]_{369-the car} , and [we]_1294-we can see [him]_2959-i slumped in the front seat . [We]_1294-we both get out to run up to [the car]_{369-the car} . “ Thank God [you]_2959-i ’re here , ”_[2959-i] [he]_2959-i splutters when [he]_2959-i sees [her]_198-molly . Then [he]_2959-i sees [me]_2959-i , and [his]_2959-i face falls . “ It ’s all right . This is [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly says . “ What happened ? ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i points at [her]_198-molly and [me]_2959-i . “ Do not tell a soul . ”_[2959-i] “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i gets out of [the car]_{369-the car} , and [we]_1294-we both look down . [He]_2959-i has a huge erection . “ What the fuck ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly gasps . “ [I]_2959-i have a Tinder date tonight , so [I]_2959-i took a Viagra , but it did n’t seem to work , so [I]_2959-i took another two . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i put [my]_2959-i hands over [my]_2959-i mouth in horror . [Molly]_198-molly ’s eyes widen . “ [You]_198-molly took three Viagra ? ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i nods , [his]_2959-i erection nearly splitting [his]_2959-i pants . “ [You]_198-molly are [the stupidest fucking man [I]_2959-i ’ve ever known]_198-molly . ”_[2959-i] “ Without a doubt . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i winces . [He]_2959-i goes to move and then gets dizzy and has to hold on to [the car]_{369-the car} for balance . “ Get in [the car]_{369-the car} , ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly demands . “ [I]_198-molly ’m taking [you]_198-molly to [the ER]_{2911-the er} . ”_[198-molly] “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [he]_2959-i stammers . “ No . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_198-molly have no blood left in [your]_198-molly body , [you]_198-molly stupid fuck ! ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly cries . [He]_2959-i puts [his]_2959-i head into [his]_2959-i hands , and [I]_2959-i want to burst out laughing so hard . [I]_2959-i bite [my]_2959-i lip to stop [myself]_2959-i as [I]_2959-i look between [the two of [them]_{2419-the two of them}]_{2419-the two of them} . “ What ’s the ER going to do ? ”_[2959-i] [he]_2959-i cries . “ Other than laugh at [the middle - aged man with a Tinder erection]_{2912-the middle - aged man with a tinder erection} , nothing . Get in [the damn car]_{1298-the damn car} . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i goes to walk and then falls to the ground , and [we]_1297-we both run to pick [him]_2959-i up and put [him]_2959-i in the front of [[Molly]_198-molly ’s car]_{1298-the damn car} . [I]_2959-i climb in the back . [Molly]_198-molly ’s eyes flick to [him]_2959-i as [he]_2959-i lies back on the seat in pain , and [I]_2959-i stay silent , unsure what to say . [I]_2959-i ’ll catch [a cab]_{707-a cab} [home]_2289-home from [the ER]_{2911-the er} . [I]_2959-i do n’t want to be in the way . [Molly]_198-molly shakes [her]_198-molly head as [she]_198-molly drives . “ So . . . let [me]_198-molly get this straight , [Michael]_60-michael . [You]_60-michael ’re going out with [Madam Whorebag]_{187-madam whorebag} tonight , and [you]_60-michael go to all this trouble to satisfy whoever [she]_198-molly is in bed ? ”_[198-molly] [He]_2959-i looks over at [her]_198-molly and clenches [his]_2959-i jaw as if [he]_2959-i knows what ’s coming next . “ [You]_60-michael could n’t even be bothered to have sex with [me]_198-molly at all , [Michael]_60-michael ! ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly screams . “ How the hell do [you]_60-michael think that makes [me]_198-molly feel ? ”_[198-molly] “ Because [you]_60-michael did n’t fucking like it , ”_[2959-i] [he]_2959-i fires back . “ Because [I]_2959-i got two fucking pumps . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes widen . Oh jeez . [I]_2959-i so do n’t want to be here right now . [I]_2959-i slump into [my]_2959-i seat to try to hide . “ Why do [you]_60-michael think [I]_2959-i have to take this shit ? Huh ? ”_[2959-i] [he]_2959-i yells . “ Because [I]_2959-i knew what a fucking disappointment [I]_2959-i was to [you]_60-michael . ”_[2959-i] [Molly]_198-molly ’s eyes widen in rage . “ [You]_60-michael were never a disappointment . [You]_60-michael were fucking lazy and did n’t care . ”_[198-molly] “ [I]_2959-i did so care ! ”_[2959-i] [he]_2959-i screams . “ Losing [you]_60-michael is the biggest regret of [my]_2959-i life . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i put [my]_2959-i head into [my]_2959-i hands . [I]_2959-i wonder if [they]_1302-they would notice if [I]_2959-i dived out of [the moving car]_{369-the car} . [Molly]_198-molly glares at [him]_2959-i , and [the car]_{369-the car} coasts to one side of [the highway]_{533-the road} . [I]_2959-i wince . “ Eyes on [the road]_{533-the road} , [Moll]_198-molly , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [She]_198-molly straightens [the car]_{369-the car} . “ So why did n’t [you]_2913-you call [her]_198-molly to come and get [you]_2913-you tonight , huh ? ”_[198-molly] “ Because [I]_2959-i would n’t tell [her]_198-molly anything about [me]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i sighs as [he]_2959-i leans [his]_2959-i head onto [his]_2959-i hand , clearly upset . “ Why not ? ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly yells . “ Because [she]_198-molly ’s not [you]_2913-you ! ”_[198-molly] [The car]_{369-the car} falls silent , and [my]_2959-i eyes fill with tears . [He]_2959-i still loves [her]_198-molly . Oh . . . this is so sad . Moments later [we]_1305-we pull into [the hospital]_{1306-the hospital} and help [him]_2959-i out of [the car]_{369-the car} and into [the reception room]_{1307-the reception room} , and [Molly]_198-molly goes up to the desk . “ [[My]_198-molly husband]_{2914-my husband} needs to see [somebody]_251-somebody , please . ”_[198-molly] “ What ’s the problem ? ”_{[1308-the nurse]} [the nurse]_{1308-the nurse} asks . [She]_{1308-the nurse} drops [her]_{1308-the nurse} shoulders as [she]_{1308-the nurse} steels [herself]_{1308-the nurse} to say it out loud . “ [I]_{1308-the nurse} accidentally gave [him]_2959-i too much [Viagra]_26-viagra . ”_{[1308-the nurse]} [Michael]_60-michael takes [her]_{1308-the nurse} hand in a silent thank - [you]_60-michael , and [I]_2959-i smile softly . [She]_{1308-the nurse} ’s covering for [him]_2959-i to save [him]_2959-i the embarrassment . “ Oh . ”_{[1308-the nurse]} [The nurse]_{1308-the nurse} ’s face falls , and [she]_{1308-the nurse} gets a wheelchair . With [Molly]_198-molly walking beside [him]_2959-i , [he]_2959-i is wheeled down [the corridor]_{609-the corridor} . [I]_2959-i take a seat and inhale deeply as [my]_2959-i faith in the human race is restored . [I]_2959-i learned a lesson tonight — love comes in all shapes and sizes . [Jameson]_186-jameson [I]_2959-i tap the whiteboard in front of [me]_2959-i as [I]_2959-i stand and go through [our]_1310-our discussion topics . “ This projection here is based on the current climate . However , that may change when the election goes through . ”_[178-buzz] [Buzz]_178-buzz . [My]_2959-i phone dances across the table , and [I]_2959-i look up at [the men]_{378-the men} sitting around the board table . Damn it , just let it ring out . [Elliot]_140-elliot glances down at [my]_2959-i phone at the same time to see the caller ID . FB . But [I]_2959-i want to hear [her]_{1308-the nurse} voice ; two minutes wo n’t hurt . “ [I]_{1308-the nurse} have to take this call . [Elliot]_140-elliot , can [you]_{1308-the nurse} go through the advertising strategy for next month , please , while [I]_{1308-the nurse} do ? ”_{[1308-the nurse]} “ Sure thing . ”_[140-elliot] [Elliot]_140-elliot stands and takes over , and [I]_2959-i answer the call and leave [the room]_{514-the room} and head into [[Christopher]_{141-christopher} ’s office]_{1313-christopher ’s office} next door . “ Hello . ”_{[1308-the nurse]} “ Hi . ”_{[186-jameson]} [Emily]_186-jameson ’s happy voice beams down the phone line . “ Hi . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i find [myself]_2959-i smiling stupidly as [I]_2959-i stand at the window overlooking [London]_6-london . “ Did [I]_186-jameson interrupt anything ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [she]_186-jameson asks . [I]_2959-i smirk . Only a meeting with [twelve management staff]_{1314-twelve management staff} . “ No , not at all . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i called to tell [you]_{1308-the nurse} [I]_2959-i bought new sneakers . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . “ [You]_{1308-the nurse} did ? ”_[2959-i] “ Uh - huh , [they]_{1314-twelve management staff} ’re motorized , so [I]_0-aaron will be whipping [your]_{1308-the nurse} ass on [park]_{385-new york} runs from [here]_{385-new york} on in . Just thought [I]_0-aaron should warn [you]_{1308-the nurse} . ”_[0-aaron] [God]_0-aaron . . . [she]_186-jameson ’s so refreshingly normal . When has [a woman]_{339-a woman} ever called [me]_2959-i to tell [me]_2959-i [she]_186-jameson bought new sneakers ? “ [I]_{339-a woman} highly doubt that . ”_{[339-a woman]} “ Oh hell , [you]_{1308-the nurse} wo n’t believe what happened last night , ”_{[186-jameson]} [she]_186-jameson continues . “ [[Molly]_198-molly ’s ex - husband]_{2917-molly ’s ex - husband} took two [Viagra]_26-viagra , maybe three , and passed out while [he]_{2917-molly ’s ex - husband} was driving because [he]_{2917-molly ’s ex - husband} had no blood left in [his]_{2917-molly ’s ex - husband} body because it was all in [his]_{2917-molly ’s ex - husband} dick , so [we]_2918-we had to take [him]_{2917-molly ’s ex - husband} to [the ER]_{2911-the er} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i laugh out loud . “ What the hell ? Is that a thing ? ”_[2959-i] “ Yes , it ’s a thing . Who knew ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i widen [my]_2959-i eyes . [Jesus]_107-jesus . “ [I]_2959-i ’ll have to stop taking it , then , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i tease . [She]_186-jameson laughs . “ No , it ’s okay . [I]_186-jameson completely know what to do now . Passing out is well worth it . [You]_2920-you stay on that shit — [we]_2918-we just need to tourniquet it . [I]_186-jameson ’ve got [us]_2918-we covered . ”_{[186-jameson]} [We]_1316-we both laugh and then fall silent . “ Three days , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i murmur . “ Three days , ”_{[186-jameson]} [she]_186-jameson repeats . [God]_0-aaron , [I]_2959-i ’ve never been so anxious to get [home]_2289-home in [my]_2959-i life . “ What are [you]_0-aaron doing now ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ [I]_2959-i ’m about to put a face mask on and take a bath with cut - up cucumber over [my]_2959-i eyes . [You]_0-aaron ’re missing out on a real visual sensation over here . ”_[2959-i] “ No doubt . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . [This woman]_186-jameson is so naturally beautiful . [She]_186-jameson does n’t try to be something [she]_186-jameson ’s not . [I]_2959-i love that about [her]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i love a lot of things about [her]_186-jameson . . . “ So [you]_0-aaron ’ve added cucumbers to [your]_0-aaron beauty regimen now ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ Yeah , it ’s supposed to make [you]_0-aaron less puffy . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile broadly . “ Cucumbers are good for a lot of things . Maybe it should be added to [our]_2921-our sexual regimen as well . ”_{[186-jameson]} [She]_186-jameson bursts out laughing . “ [You]_0-aaron ’re a sicko , [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ So [you]_0-aaron keep telling [me]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [I]_2959-i ’ll let [you]_0-aaron go . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smirk as [I]_2959-i look out the window . “ Goodbye , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] “ Goodbye , [Jay]_108-jay , ”_{[186-jameson]} [she]_186-jameson whispers . The phone goes dead , and [I]_2959-i head back into [the boardroom]_{1318-the boardroom} and take a seat . [Christopher]_{141-christopher} is now talking about something , and [I]_2959-i take [my]_2959-i seat next to [Elliot]_140-elliot . [He]_140-elliot leans over and whispers , “ [You]_108-jay have [Zuckerberg]_{188-zuckerberg} on speed dial now ? ”_[140-elliot] “ Huh ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ FB . . . that stands for Facebook , right ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown and then realize [he]_140-elliot ’s talking about the call from [Emily]_186-jameson . [FB]_185-fb stands for fuck bunny , not Facebook . [I]_2959-i smirk , and then [I]_2959-i pinch the bridge of [my]_2959-i nose as [my]_2959-i chuckle breaks through . “ What ’s so funny ? ”_[140-elliot] [Elliot]_140-elliot whispers . “ [Zuckerberg]_{188-zuckerberg} bought motorized sneakers . ”_[140-elliot] [Elliot]_140-elliot rolls [his]_140-elliot eyes . “ It would n’t surprise [me]_140-elliot . [That guy]_{2774-that guy} ’s fucking crazy . ”_[140-elliot] [I]_2959-i catch [a cab]_{707-a cab} with a thousand thoughts running through [my]_2959-i mind . There ’s so much history between [the two of [us]_1321-us]_{1320-the two of us} . [I]_2959-i ’m on [my]_2959-i way to see [[my]_2959-i ex , who was supposed to be the love of [my]_2959-i life]_{1322-my ex , who was supposed to be the love of my life} . It ’s been a long time since [I]_2959-i ’ve seen [Claudia]_57-claudia . [She]_57-claudia was in the States the last time [I]_2959-i was in [London]_6-london . Both being workaholics has always worked against [us]_1321-us — time together is precious . [I]_2959-i knock on the door and exhale ; [my]_2959-i nerves are thumping heavily . The door opens in a rush , and [her]_57-claudia beautiful face comes into view . [She]_57-claudia smiles broadly and wraps [her]_57-claudia arms around [my]_2959-i neck . “ Thank God [you]_2923-you ’re here , ”_[57-claudia] [she]_57-claudia whispers into [my]_2959-i neck . “ [I]_57-claudia ’ve missed [you]_2923-you . ”_[57-claudia] Chapter 16 “ Hello . ”_[57-claudia] [I]_2959-i smile as [she]_57-claudia leads [me]_2959-i into [[her]_57-claudia house]_{1323-her house} by the hand . [Her]_57-claudia touch is warm . . . familiar . “ How are [you]_2923-you ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ Good now that [you]_2923-you ’re here . ”_[57-claudia] [She]_57-claudia takes [me]_2959-i in [her]_57-claudia arms , and [I]_2959-i smile down at [her]_57-claudia . There ’s a bond between [us]_1324-us that can never be broken . Realizing what [I]_2959-i ’m doing , [I]_2959-i pull out of [her]_57-claudia arms and stand back . Being in [her]_57-claudia arms was n’t on today ’s agenda . [Her]_57-claudia face falls before [she]_57-claudia quickly recovers . “ Any news on the sabotage ? ”_[57-claudia] “ No , none yet . ”_[57-claudia] [She]_57-claudia watches [me]_2959-i for a moment , and [her]_57-claudia knowing eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ [You]_57-claudia have something on [your]_57-claudia mind . What is it ? ”_[57-claudia] “ [I]_57-claudia ’ve met [someone]_2326-someone . ”_[57-claudia] “ Do n’t . ”_[57-claudia] [She]_57-claudia turns [her]_57-claudia back to [me]_2959-i and walks to [the kitchen]_{683-the kitchen} and puts the kettle on . “ [I]_57-claudia could n’t help it . ”_[57-claudia] [I]_2959-i walk up behind [her]_57-claudia and put [my]_2959-i hand out to touch [her]_57-claudia and then recoil it . [I]_2959-i take a safe step back . “ Do n’t tell [me]_2959-i [you]_57-claudia could n’t help it when [we]_2925-we both know [you]_57-claudia can . ”_[2959-i] “ The pull to [her]_57-claudia is strong . ”_[2959-i] “ Physical pull ? ”_[57-claudia] [she]_57-claudia asks flatly . [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i lips as [I]_2959-i watch [her]_57-claudia ; [she]_57-claudia ’s going to go postal any moment . “ At first , yes . [I]_57-claudia thought it was just physical . ”_[57-claudia] [Her]_57-claudia eyes come to [mine]_2959-i . “ How long ago did [you]_57-claudia meet [her]_57-claudia ? ”_[57-claudia] “ Twelve months . ”_[57-claudia] [Her]_57-claudia face screws up in fury . “ [You]_57-claudia ’ve been seeing [someone]_2326-someone for twelve months ? ”_[57-claudia] “ No , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . “ [I]_2959-i met [her]_57-claudia on a flight a year ago , [we]_2927-we spent a night together on a layover , and [I]_2959-i ’ve recently run into [her]_57-claudia again . ”_[2959-i] “ Big deal , [Jameson]_186-jameson . [You]_57-claudia ’ve slept with [a lot of [women]_276-women]_{2928-a lot of women} while [we]_2927-we ’ve been on this break , ”_[57-claudia] [she]_57-claudia fires back angrily . “ [This one]_100-bingo ’s different , [Claudia]_57-claudia , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say softly . [She]_57-claudia rolls [her]_57-claudia eyes in disgust and turns [her]_57-claudia back to [me]_2959-i once again . “ [I]_57-claudia ’ve thought of her”—I_[57-claudia] pause , unsure how much to share—“a lot since [we]_2927-we met , and then it was as if [I]_2959-i . . . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i voice trails off , and [I]_2959-i stare at [her]_57-claudia back as [I]_2959-i wait for [her]_57-claudia reply . “ As if [you]_57-claudia what ? ”_[57-claudia] [she]_57-claudia eventually asks . “ It was as if [I]_57-claudia willed [her]_57-claudia back into [my]_57-claudia life . ”_[57-claudia] [She]_57-claudia turns sharply . “ Meaning what ? ”_[57-claudia] “ [She]_57-claudia ’d been on [my]_57-claudia mind a lot . . . and then [she]_57-claudia showed up in [[my]_57-claudia office]_{455-my office} . ”_[57-claudia] [She]_57-claudia rolls [her]_57-claudia eyes , unimpressed . “ Of course [she]_57-claudia would — [you’re Jameson Miles]_186-jameson . ”_[57-claudia] “ [She]_57-claudia had no idea who [I]_57-claudia was when [we]_2932-we met . [I]_57-claudia gave [her]_57-claudia a fake name . ”_[57-claudia] “ So why are [you]_57-claudia [here]_{385-new york} , [Jameson]_186-jameson ? ”_[57-claudia] [she]_57-claudia demands . [I]_2959-i swallow the lump of regret in [my]_2959-i throat . “ [I]_2959-i ’m here to end it with [you]_57-claudia . ”_[2959-i] “ Do n’t [you]_57-claudia . ”_[57-claudia] [She]_57-claudia points at [me]_2959-i . “ Do n’t [you]_57-claudia dare throw away everything [we]_2932-we ’ve worked so hard to keep together . ”_[57-claudia] [Her]_57-claudia eyes fill with tears . “ [Claud]_189-claud . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sigh softly . “ [We]_2932-we ’re no good together . [We]_2932-we ’re both workaholics , [we]_2932-we live on other sides of [the world]_{249-the world} , and unless [one of [us]_2932-we]_{2800-one of us} loses [our]_2932-we job , that ’s never going to change . [I]_2959-i ca n’t be anywhere but [New York]_{385-new york} . ”_[2959-i] “ What if [I]_57-claudia moved back ? ”_[57-claudia] [she]_57-claudia offers . “ And give up [your]_57-claudia dream job ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sigh . “ [I]_57-claudia would n’t let [you]_57-claudia do that for [me]_57-claudia . [I]_57-claudia know how hard [you]_57-claudia ’ve worked for this job . ”_[57-claudia] [She]_57-claudia stares at [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i take [her]_57-claudia in [my]_2959-i arms . “ [You]_57-claudia need to fall in love with [someone who can support [you]_57-claudia in [your]_57-claudia role]_{2936-someone who can support you in your role} . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_57-claudia have , ”_[57-claudia] [she]_57-claudia whispers as [she]_57-claudia clings to [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i close [my]_2959-i eyes as [I]_2959-i kiss [her]_57-claudia temple . “ [Two people who are wired the same way ca n’t be in a forever relationship]_{2937-two people who are wired the same way ca n’t be in a forever relationship} . [We]_{2937-two people who are wired the same way ca n’t be in a forever relationship} need to be with opposites , [Claud]_189-claud . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i squeeze [her]_57-claudia a bit tighter . “ Two workaholics will never work . [We]_{2937-two people who are wired the same way ca n’t be in a forever relationship} ’re both too focused and too stressed out to properly look after [one another]_{2938-one another} . ”_[57-claudia] [She]_57-claudia stares at [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i know that deep down , [she]_57-claudia knows [I]_2959-i ’m right . [Her]_57-claudia eyes well with tears . “ What happened to [our]_{2937-two people who are wired the same way ca n’t be in a forever relationship} five - year plan ? ”_[57-claudia] [she]_57-claudia whispers . “ It was good in theory , but come on . [We]_{2937-two people who are wired the same way ca n’t be in a forever relationship} both knew when [we]_{2937-two people who are wired the same way ca n’t be in a forever relationship} made the break that there was a big chance [we]_{2937-two people who are wired the same way ca n’t be in a forever relationship} would n’t make it through to the other side . ”_[57-claudia] “ [I]_57-claudia ’ll move back , ”_[57-claudia] [she]_57-claudia pleads . [My]_2959-i eyes hold [hers]_57-claudia , and [I]_2959-i know there ’s no easy way to say this . “ It ’s too late . [I]_57-claudia have feelings for [Emily]_186-jameson . It ’s [her]_57-claudia that [I]_57-claudia want now . ”_[57-claudia] [Her]_57-claudia face screws up in anger . “ [Emily]_186-jameson , is it ? ”_[57-claudia] [she]_57-claudia sneers . [I]_2959-i clench [my]_2959-i jaw as [I]_2959-i watch [her]_57-claudia . “ Who is [she]_57-claudia ? What does [she]_57-claudia do ? ”_[2959-i] “ [She]_57-claudia ’s just [a normal girl from [the suburbs]_{2939-the suburbs}]_57-claudia . ”_[57-claudia] [She]_57-claudia rolls [her]_57-claudia eyes in disgust . “ [You]_57-claudia . . . with [a normal girl]_57-claudia ? [Ha]_163-ha , what a joke . [I]_57-claudia suppose [she]_57-claudia cooks and cleans and fusses over [you]_57-claudia and sucks [your]_57-claudia dick on command , does [she]_57-claudia ? ”_[57-claudia] [I]_2959-i inhale to hold [my]_2959-i anger deeply . “ [She]_57-claudia ’s good for [me]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_57-claudia ’m good for [you]_57-claudia , ”_[57-claudia] [she]_57-claudia fires back . “ As [a work colleague]_{2940-a work colleague} or [employee]_{2941-employee} , yes — as [a mate]_{2942-a mate} . . . not so much . ”_[57-claudia] [Her]_57-claudia eyes fill with tears anew . “ [I]_2959-i ’m not good for [you]_57-claudia . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug . “ [I]_2959-i ’m so busy that [I]_2959-i ca n’t be there for [you]_57-claudia either . [You]_57-claudia deserve to be doted on , but [I]_2959-i ca n’t do that from [New York]_{385-new york} , [Claud]_189-claud ; [you]_57-claudia know [I]_2959-i ca n’t . There is no way around this situation . [Our]_2943-our lives are traveling on different paths . [Two CEOs]_106-ceos ca n’t hold [their]_106-ceos careers and nurture a relationship from different sides of [the world]_{249-the world} . It ’s an impossible task . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pause as [I]_2959-i try to articulate what [I]_2959-i ’m saying . “ Until [I]_2959-i met [her]_1326-her . . . [I]_2959-i did n’t realize what [we]_2943-our were both missing out on . Both [me]_2959-i and [you]_57-claudia . ”_[2959-i] [Her]_1326-her eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ [I]_1326-her wish it were [you]_57-claudia telling [me]_1326-her [you]_57-claudia ’d met [someone]_2326-someone , so then [I]_1326-her would n’t be saying this . [I]_1326-her love [you]_57-claudia , and [you]_57-claudia ’re [the last person [I]_1326-her want to hurt]_2326-someone . [I]_1326-her would much rather [you]_57-claudia hurt [me]_1326-her . ”_[1326-her] [She]_1326-her walks over and drops to the couch as [she]_1326-her processes the information . [I]_2959-i stay silent as [I]_2959-i watch [her]_1326-her . “ So what now ? ”_[1326-her] [she]_1326-her asks . “ [I]_1326-her ’m going [home]_2289-home to move [her]_1326-her into [[my]_1326-her apartment]_{766-my apartment} . ”_[1326-her] [Her]_1326-her face falls . “ What ? ”_[1326-her] “ And [I]_1326-her will be announcing [our]_2948-our relationship . ”_[1326-her] [She]_1326-her drops [her]_1326-her head in sadness . “ What ’s the rush ? ”_[1326-her] “ [You]_1326-her know [me]_1326-her — [I’m]_1326-her all or nothing . ”_[1326-her] [She]_1326-her screws up [her]_1326-her face in tears . “ Are [you]_1326-her going to marry [her]_1326-her ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stay silent . “ [You]_1326-her asked [me]_1326-her to marry [you]_1326-her four weeks after [we]_2949-we met . Are [you]_1326-her . . . ”_[1326-her] [Her]_1326-her voice trails off in hurt . [I]_2959-i clench [my]_2959-i jaw to stop [myself]_2959-i from saying something [I]_2959-i ’ll regret . [She]_1326-her drops [her]_1326-her head , and [I]_2959-i watch as [she]_1326-her cries for a moment . [I]_2959-i have to leave before [she]_1326-her gets angry . “ [I]_1326-her ’m going . ”_[1326-her] [Her]_1326-her haunted eyes come to [mine]_2959-i . “ [I]_1326-her love [you]_1326-her , ”_[1326-her] [she]_1326-her whispers . [I]_2959-i smile sadly and take [her]_1326-her in [my]_2959-i arms . “ [I]_2959-i love [you]_1326-her too . ”_[2959-i] [We]_1327-we hold each other for an extended time . “ Be happy , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper into [her]_1326-her hair . “ How could [I]_1326-her possibly be happy without [you]_1326-her , [Jameson]_186-jameson ? ”_[1326-her] [she]_1326-her whispers . “ Do n’t go . ”_[1326-her] “ [I]_2959-i have to . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pull out of [her]_1326-her arms , and without another word [I]_2959-i turn and walk out of [[Claudia]_57-claudia ’s terrace house]_{1328-claudia ’s terrace house} . [I]_2959-i get into the back of [[my]_2959-i waiting car]_{1329-my waiting car} and stare solemnly out the window as it pulls away . “ Goodbye , [Claudia]_57-claudia , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper as the scenery zooms by . “ Fly high , [baby]_336-yay . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i get a lump in [my]_2959-i throat for all the good times [we]_1330-we shared . “ [You]_57-claudia deserve the best . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sprint the last block . It ’s four in the morning , and [I]_2959-i ’m running in [New York]_{385-new york} . [I]_2959-i love [this city]_{385-new york} at night ; it has a peace that daylight does n’t deliver . Last night at [the airport]_{254-the airport} [I]_2959-i had [my]_2959-i fill of scotch and slept the entire flight [home]_2289-home , and now [I]_2959-i ’m a ball of energy . [My]_2959-i flight landed at two o’clock , too late to go to [Emily]_186-jameson ’s . . . not that it ’s stopped [me]_2959-i from running [here]_{385-new york} . [I]_2959-i pant as [I]_2959-i approach [[her]_186-jameson building]_{1334-her building} , and [I]_2959-i stare up at it and go to the intercom . [My]_2959-i finger hovers over [her]_186-jameson button . [My]_2959-i chest rises and falls as [I]_2959-i hesitate . It ’s four o’clock , and [she]_186-jameson has to work tomorrow . Do n’t be selfish . Fuck , [I]_2959-i ca n’t help it with [her]_186-jameson — [I]_2959-i am selfish . [I]_2959-i want [her]_186-jameson around the clock . [I]_2959-i walk out onto [the street]_{550-the street} and stand at the gutter with [my]_2959-i hands on [my]_2959-i hips as [I]_2959-i struggle for breath . Spits of rain begin to splatter , and [I]_2959-i look up at the sky . [I]_2959-i love running in the rain . It starts to really come down , and [I]_2959-i turn back and look up at [[Emily]_186-jameson ’s building]_{1336-emily ’s building} . [I]_2959-i count the floors until [I]_2959-i get to [her]_186-jameson windows . [I]_2959-i imagine [her]_186-jameson sleeping in [her]_186-jameson bed with [her]_186-jameson long dark hair splayed across [her]_186-jameson pillow , [her]_186-jameson beautiful curvy body curled up like [she]_186-jameson does , and eyes that could talk [me]_2959-i into anything . Tomorrow . . . well , today now . [I]_2959-i smile up at [her]_186-jameson window as the rain really comes down , and [I]_2959-i turn and begin the long run [home]_2289-home . Tomorrow [I]_2959-i start fresh with [Emily Foster]_186-jameson . [Emily]_186-jameson [I]_2959-i walk through the security check with a spring in [my]_2959-i step . [Jameson]_186-jameson got [home]_2289-home last night . [I]_2959-i get to see [him]_186-jameson today . [I]_2959-i ’m so excited that [I]_2959-i even got up early and curled [my]_2959-i hair , and [I]_2959-i ’m wearing [my]_2959-i gray skirt in full swing . A week has never felt so long . [I]_2959-i take the elevator up to [my]_2959-i floor and sit at [my]_2959-i desk . “ Hey , ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron says over [his]_0-aaron coffee cup . “ Hi there . ”_[0-aaron] [I]_2959-i smile . “ What ’s that look ? ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron smirks . “ [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s [home]_2289-home . ”_[0-aaron] “ How do [you]_0-aaron know ? ”_[0-aaron] “ Well , [I]_2959-i hope [he]_186-jameson ’s [home]_2289-home . [He]_186-jameson called [me]_2959-i from [the airport]_{268-the plane} , and [he]_186-jameson was all boozy , so [I]_2959-i ’m hoping [he]_186-jameson made it onto [the plane]_{268-the plane} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i look over to see [Hayden]_266-jim at [the photocopying machine area]_{1338-the photocopying machine area} . [He]_266-jim ’s talking to [a group of girls]_{1339-a group of girls} . “ How well do [you]_2952-you know [Hayden]_266-jim ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ Hmm . ”_[266-jim] [He]_266-jim thinks for a moment . “ Not that well . [Molly]_198-molly knows [him]_266-jim from [her]_198-molly old job . ”_[266-jim] “ Where was that ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask as [I]_2959-i turn [my]_2959-i computer on . “ [They]_{1339-a group of girls} worked at the Gazette together . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes flick to [him]_266-jim . “ [Molly]_198-molly worked at [the Gazette]_{596-the gazette} ? ”_[2959-i] “ Yeah , for years . [Miles Media]_{68-miles media} headhunted [her]_198-molly . ”_[2959-i] Shit . A sinister thought crosses [my]_2959-i mind . No , not [Molly]_198-molly . Do n’t be stupid . It could n’t be . Do n’t even think that . [Tristan]_2430-tristan and [I]_2959-i tested the theory over the last week , and every time [I]_2959-i gave [Hayden]_266-jim a story before four o’clock , it was printed in the Gazette the next day . There ’s definitely a correlation somewhere . Whether it ’s [Hayden]_266-jim or above [him]_266-jim , [we]_1340-we ’re trying to find out . [I]_2959-i really like [Tristan]_2430-tristan ; [he]_2430-tristan ’s funny and intelligent and a lot softer around the edges than [[his]_2430-tristan brother]_{617-his brother} . “ What happened with [Paul]_101-paul last night ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ [He]_2430-tristan turned up . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan looks at [me]_2959-i sheepishly . “ Oh God , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i mutter dryly . “ Do n’t tell [me]_2430-tristan [you]_2954-you slept with [him]_2430-tristan . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan hits the keys on [his]_2430-tristan computer with force . “ Yep . [I]_2430-tristan ca n’t resist [that fucking asshole]_2430-tristan . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ Did [you]_2954-you have it out with [him]_2430-tristan yet ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ No . [I]_2430-tristan want to catch [him]_2430-tristan in the act . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ So why are [you]_2954-you still fucking [him]_2430-tristan ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . “ For [God]_0-aaron ’s sake , [Aaron]_0-aaron , do n’t be used . ”_[2959-i] “ For the record , [I]_2430-tristan ’m using [him]_2430-tristan . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan rolls [his]_2430-tristan eyes as [he]_2430-tristan sips [his]_2430-tristan coffee . “ [Nobody]_2321-nobody ’s dick is that good , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i huff . “ Except [his]_2430-tristan . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan sighs sadly . “ [Ugh]_61-ugh . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i wince . “ Leave [me]_2430-tristan alone with [the asshole]_{663-the asshole} for five minutes with a carving knife . [I]_2430-tristan ’ll get it for [you]_0-aaron to take away . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan laughs , and [my]_2959-i phone rings . “ Hello . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ Hi , [Emily]_186-jameson , this is [Sammia]_246-alan . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ Oh , hi . ”_{[2430-tristan]} Excitement runs through [me]_2959-i . “ [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} would like to see [you]_186-jameson in [[his]_2430-tristan office]_{426-his office} right away , please . ”_[2959-i] A huge smile splits [my]_2959-i face . “ On [my]_2959-i way . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i hang up and stand . “ Where are [you]_186-jameson going ? ”_[2959-i] “ Oh , more training , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i lie . “ [Jesus]_107-jesus , [you]_107-jesus ’ll be more qualified than [anyone on this floor]_{2958-anyone on this floor} soon . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i know . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . “ Back soon . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i take [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} up to the top floor , and the doors open . [I]_2959-i can hardly keep a straight face . [He]_246-alan ’s here . [I]_2959-i want to run . “ Good morning , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_[246-alan] [Sammia]_246-alan smiles . “ Just go through . ”_[246-alan] “ Morning . Okay , thanks . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i walk through and down to [[Jameson]_186-jameson ’s office]_{2600-jameson ’s office} , and [I]_2959-i knock on the door . “ Come in , ”_[246-alan] [his]_246-alan deep velvety voice calls . [I]_2959-i open the door , and [his]_246-alan eyes come to [me]_2959-i with the best “ come fuck [me]_246-alan ”_[246-alan] look [I]_2959-i ’ve ever seen . [My]_2959-i breath catches . Standing by the window in [his]_246-alan navy suit and crisp white shirt , [he]_246-alan is [the ultimate male specimen]_246-alan . [I]_2959-i forgot how gorgeous [he]_246-alan is . [He]_246-alan gives [me]_2959-i a slow , sexy smile . “ Hello . ”_[246-alan] “ Hi , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i breathe . [I]_2959-i have to stop [myself]_2959-i from running to [him]_246-alan . The air crackles between [us]_1345-us , and [he]_246-alan walks to [me]_2959-i and takes [my]_2959-i face in [his]_246-alan hands and kisses [me]_2959-i , all suction and a little tongue . [I]_2959-i feel [my]_2959-i legs go weak at the knees . “ [I]_246-alan ’ve missed [[my]_246-alan girl]_2959-i , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan murmurs against [my]_2959-i lips . [I]_2959-i smile , and [he]_246-alan wraps [my]_2959-i ponytail around [his]_246-alan hand three times and pulls [my]_2959-i head back aggressively . [His]_246-alan thick tongue goes to [my]_2959-i collarbone and licks up to [my]_2959-i neck . “ Have [you]_2959-i missed [me]_246-alan ? ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan asks as [his]_246-alan teeth nip [my]_2959-i neck . [I]_2959-i wince as arousal runs through [my]_2959-i blood like a river rapid . Jesus , [the CEO]_{2388-the ceo} is back in all [his]_{2388-the ceo} glory . “ God , yes , ”_{[2388-the ceo]} [I]_2959-i breathe . [He]_246-alan kisses [me]_2959-i again , and the door opens . “ Hey , ”_[246-alan] [Tristan]_2430-tristan ’s voice calls before [he]_246-alan stops instantly . “ Not now , [Tristan]_2430-tristan , ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson says without letting [my]_2959-i ponytail go . [His]_246-alan dark eyes stay fixed on [mine]_2959-i . [My]_2959-i heart races at the way [he]_246-alan ’s looking at [me]_2959-i . [He]_246-alan ’s different . . . more intense . “ Sorry , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan says before the door closes . [He]_246-alan kisses [me]_2959-i again , [my]_2959-i head held back just as [he]_246-alan wants [me]_2959-i . “ [I]_246-alan want to make a go of this . ”_[246-alan] “ Of what ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i breathe . “ Of [us]_2960-we . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i thought [we]_2960-we were ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ No . [We]_2960-we were fucking before . Now [I]_246-alan want [you]_246-alan . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan bites [my]_2959-i neck , and [I]_2959-i whimper . “ [I]_246-alan want all of [you]_246-alan . ”_[246-alan] [His]_246-alan hand grabs [my]_2959-i behind , and [he]_246-alan pulls [me]_2959-i against [his]_246-alan waiting hard cock . Oh jeez . . . welcome [home]_2289-home . [I]_2959-i kiss [his]_246-alan big lips . “ Okay . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan holds [my]_2959-i face in [his]_246-alan hands and stares down at [me]_2959-i as the air leaves [my]_2959-i lungs . “ Tonight . [My]_246-alan place , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan breathes . [I]_2959-i smile softly as [my]_2959-i sex begins to throb in anticipation . “ Yes . ”_[2959-i] “ Do [you]_246-alan want to go out for dinner ? ”_[246-alan] “ No , [I]_246-alan want to cook . Do [you]_246-alan have groceries ? ”_[246-alan] [His]_246-alan brow furrows . “ [I]_246-alan ’ll get [Alan]_246-alan to pick something up . ”_[246-alan] “ No . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ [I]_246-alan want to go to [the grocery store]_{2961-the grocery store} . ”_[246-alan] [His]_246-alan hands roam up and down [my]_2959-i body as if [he]_246-alan does n’t know where to start . “ Take [the limo]_{1159-a limo} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i screw up [my]_2959-i face . “ [I]_246-alan ’m not going to [the grocery store in [a limo]_{1159-a limo}]_{2961-the grocery store} . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan grabs [my]_2959-i hand and places it over the huge erection in [his]_246-alan suit pants , and [I]_2959-i grab it as [his]_246-alan eyes flicker in arousal . “ [I]_246-alan need [you]_246-alan , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan breathes as [he]_246-alan bites [my]_2959-i bottom lip . “ Oh God , [me]_246-alan too . ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i pull out of [his]_246-alan grip as [I]_2959-i pant . “ [I]_2959-i have to get back to work . ”_[2959-i] God . . . it would be so easy to stay here and fuck [the boss]_{1348-the boss} instead . “ [I]_2959-i ’ll have [Alan]_246-alan deliver [the car]_{369-the car} to [you]_246-alan . [You]_246-alan use it from now on . ”_[2959-i] “ [The car]_{369-the car} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . [He]_246-alan has [a car]_{369-the car} ? “ Just use it as [your]_246-alan own . ”_[246-alan] [His]_246-alan hands grind [me]_2959-i onto [his]_246-alan body . [He]_246-alan ’s completely preoccupied with arousal . “ [I]_246-alan only need it to do groceries just today . Do n’t bother [Alan]_246-alan . [I]_246-alan can get it from [[your]_246-alan apartment]_{2745-your apartment} . ”_[246-alan] “ [[Our]_2964-our apartment]_{2745-your apartment} . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan bites [my]_2959-i neck as [he]_246-alan really begins to eat [me]_2959-i . Goose bumps scatter all over [my]_2959-i body . “ Huh ? ”_[246-alan] “ [You]_246-alan ’ll be moving in with [me]_246-alan . ”_[246-alan] “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pull out of [his]_246-alan arms as [my]_2959-i arousal fog temporarily lifts . “ What did [you]_246-alan say ? ”_[246-alan] [His]_246-alan dark eyes dance with delight . “ If [I]_246-alan ’m doing this , [I]_246-alan ’m fucking doing this . ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_246-alan . What the hell ? “ [I]_246-alan do n’t do things by half , [Emily]_186-jameson . If [you]_186-jameson ’re with [me]_246-alan , [you]_186-jameson ’re with [me]_246-alan . ”_[246-alan] “ [Jameson]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ Have [you]_186-jameson gone crazy ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_246-alan have meetings scheduled back to back all day , or [I]_246-alan would be bending [you]_186-jameson over [my]_246-alan desk right now . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan turns [me]_2959-i around and slaps [me]_2959-i on the behind . “ Now get back to work before [I]_246-alan do it . ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i pant as [I]_2959-i stare at the door . A visual of [me]_2959-i lying across [his]_246-alan desk with [my]_2959-i legs open swirls through [my]_2959-i head . How am [I]_2959-i supposed to string two thoughts together after [he]_246-alan says that ? “ Yes , [sir]_246-alan . ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i begin to walk to the door . “ Oh , and [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan calls in [his]_246-alan commanding voice . [I]_2959-i turn . “ [I]_2959-i will be announcing today that [we]_2965-we are in a relationship . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown as [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_246-alan . Confusion swirls around in [my]_2959-i head . “ Why ? ”_[2959-i] “ Because [I]_246-alan hate speculation . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan pauses as [his]_246-alan eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ And [I]_246-alan want [everyone]_{2304-everyone} to know that [you]_246-alan ’re [mine]_2959-i . ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_246-alan . Huh ? [His]_246-alan . [I]_2959-i have no words . . . rendered completely speechless . “ Oh . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_246-alan . “ Okay ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i turn and walk toward [the foyer]_{670-the foyer} . “ Goodbye , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i mutter , distracted . Either [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson has gone completely crazy , or [I]_2959-i am in a parallel universe . Two hours later , [I]_2959-i sit and stare at [my]_2959-i computer . [I]_2959-i was too freaked out to talk about this morning ’s Twilight Zone encounter in [[Jameson]_186-jameson ’s office]_{2600-jameson ’s office} when [I]_2959-i returned . It ’s taken [me]_2959-i this long to get [my]_2959-i head around what [he]_246-alan said . [I]_2959-i ’ve come to the conclusion that [he]_246-alan ’s obviously jet lagged to holy hell and is suffering some kind of delusion . [My]_2959-i phone dances across [my]_2959-i desk , and [my]_2959-i favorite letter appears . J. [I]_2959-i smile as [I]_2959-i answer . “ Hello , [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} . ”_[2959-i] “ How ’s [[my]_246-alan girl]_2959-i ? ”_[246-alan] [his]_246-alan sexy voice purrs down the line . “ Are [you]_2959-i feeling all right ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ [I]_2959-i ’m feeling great . Why ? ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_2959-i just seem very . . . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pause as [I]_2959-i think of the right word . “ Odd . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan laughs [his]_246-alan deep velvety laugh , and [I]_2959-i feel it all the way to [my]_2959-i bones . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t feel odd . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_2959-i ’re acting odd . ”_[246-alan] “ [I]_246-alan ’m just calling to tell [you]_2959-i that [we]_2968-we have a dinner tomorrow night . ”_[246-alan] “ What dinner ? ”_[2959-i] “ The Media Awards , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan replies calmly . “ The Media Awards , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i repeat . “ Yes , that ’s what [I]_2959-i said . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i look around at [[my]_2959-i two work friends]_{1352-my two work friends} , who are completely oblivious to the crazy shit that ’s coming out of [[my]_2959-i running partner]_{1353-my running partner} ’s mouth . “ Where is it ? ”_{[1353-my running partner]} “ Here in [New York]_{385-new york} . [[My]_2959-i entire family]_{2969-my entire family} will be there . [You]_2970-you ’ll get to meet [everyone]_{2304-everyone} . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes widen in horror . “ Well , what ’s the dress code ? ”_[2959-i] “ Black tie . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i feel the blood drain from [my]_2959-i face . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t have any evening dresses here , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer . [I]_2959-i do n’t have any at [home]_2289-home either , but [he]_246-alan does n’t need to know that . “ That ’s okay . [I]_246-alan ’ll have some things delivered [home]_2289-home tonight , and [you]_2970-you can pick what [you]_2970-you want to wear . ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i scratch [my]_2959-i head in confusion . “ [I]_2959-i ’ll just come to the next one , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say . “ [I]_2959-i ’ll wait at [home]_2289-home in bed for [you]_2970-you . The Media Awards are n’t really [my]_2959-i jam . ”_[2959-i] “ [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan says calmly . “ Yes . ”_[246-alan] “ [You]_2970-you are coming with [me]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] “ [Jay]_108-jay , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper as [I]_2959-i feel nerves rise in [my]_2959-i throat . “ [I]_2959-i ’ll see [you]_2970-you tonight . [I]_2959-i ’ll be a little late as [I]_2959-i have a conference call . [Alan]_246-alan is going to meet [you]_2970-you out the side entrance at five with the keys to [the car]_{369-the car} and [the apartment]_{2627-the apartment} . ”_[2959-i] “ Okay . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i puff air into [my]_2959-i cheeks . “ See [you]_2970-you then . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i hang up and put [my]_2959-i head into [my]_2959-i hands . “ What ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly asks . “ [Jameson]_186-jameson has gone insane . ”_[198-molly] “ Why ? ”_[198-molly] “ [He]_186-jameson told [me]_0-aaron this morning that [I]_0-aaron ’m moving in with [him]_186-jameson , and now [he]_186-jameson wants [me]_0-aaron to go to some awards dinner with [[his]_186-jameson entire family]_{2974-his entire family} tomorrow night . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron ’s and [Molly]_198-molly ’s eyes widen . “ What ? ”_[0-aaron] “ And [he]_186-jameson gave [me]_198-molly [[his]_186-jameson car]_{2417-his car} to use , but [I]_198-molly do n’t even know where [a grocery store]_{2976-a grocery store} is in [New York]_{385-new york} . ”_[198-molly] “ Oh , [you]_2977-you would go to the one on Fifth . ”_[0-aaron] “ Well , how do [I]_2959-i get there ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ It ’s on [my]_2959-i way . [I]_2959-i can go with [you]_2977-you if [you]_2977-you want , and [I]_2959-i ’ll get on [the subway]_{2666-the subway} from there . ”_[2959-i] “ Are [you]_2977-you sure ? ”_[198-molly] “ Yeah , [I]_2959-i have n’t got [the kids]_{452-the kids} this week anyway . It ’s not like [I]_2959-i ’m doing anything . ”_[2959-i] It ’s five in the afternoon , and [we]_1355-we have just finished work . “ Where did [he]_2959-i say it would be ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly asks as [she]_198-molly links [her]_198-molly arm through [mine]_1356-mine as [we]_1355-we exit [the Miles Media building]_{521-the miles media building} through the front doors . “ Around here to [the side exit]_{2980-the side exit} . ”_[198-molly] “ What are [you]_2977-you going to cook ? ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly asks . “ Hmm , rib eye with a mushroom sauce , honey carrots , and broccolini . ”_[198-molly] “ Hmm , yum . [Lucky bastard]_{2981-lucky bastard} . Wish [someone]_2326-someone was coming over to cook that shit for [me]_198-molly . ”_[198-molly] “ True . ”_[1355-we] [We]_1355-we turn the corner and look up and both stop dead on the spot . “ What the fuck ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [Alan]_246-alan is standing next to what looks like a time machine , and [my]_2959-i eyes widen in horror . Black , low slung , and [the sportiest looking car [I]_2959-i ’ve ever seen]_{1358-the sportiest looking car i ’ve ever seen} . The mag wheels alone probably cost more than [an average car]_{369-the car} . [Alan]_246-alan smiles warmly . “ Hello , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i look at [the car]_{369-the car} and then at [the people]_{1360-the people} walking past as [they]_{1360-the people} stare at it . “ Hi . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan passes [me]_2959-i the key and then a card . “ This is for [the car]_{369-the car} , and this is [your]_186-jameson new key to [the apartment]_{2627-the apartment} . ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i stare at [them]_{1360-the people} in [my]_2959-i hand . “ This is [the car]_{369-the car} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper as the blood drains from [my]_2959-i face . [He]_246-alan chuckles at [my]_2959-i reaction . [Molly]_198-molly puts [her]_198-molly hands over [her]_198-molly mouth and begins to laugh nervously , reminding [me]_2959-i that [she]_198-molly ’s here . “ This is [Molly]_198-molly , [[my]_198-molly friend]_198-molly , ”_[198-molly] [I]_2959-i introduce [her]_198-molly . “ Hello . ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly smiles . “ [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} asked [me]_198-molly to make a time with [you]_{79-mr. miles} to move [your]_{79-mr. miles} things out of [[your]_{79-mr. miles} apartment]_{2745-your apartment} . ”_[198-molly] [My]_2959-i eyes nearly pop from [their]_1361-their sockets . “ What ? ”_[198-molly] “ Would Saturday morning suit [you]_{79-mr. miles} ? [I]_2959-i can arrange a packing service . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes flick to [Molly]_198-molly as [she]_198-molly stares wide eyed at [me]_2959-i . Okay , what the actual fuck is going on here ? “ [I]_2959-i ’ll get back to [you]_{79-mr. miles} on that , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reply . [He]_2959-i smiles kindly . “ Okay . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i opens the car door . “ So [you]_{79-mr. miles} know how to drive a manual , obviously . ”_[2959-i] “ Can [you]_{79-mr. miles} just hold on a minute . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i hold [my]_2959-i finger up . “ Just a minute . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i turn [my]_2959-i back on them and dial [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s number . “ Hello , ”_[2959-i] [his]_2959-i sexy voice purrs . “ What the hell kind of [car]_{1349-a car} is this ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ A Bugatti . ”_[2959-i] “ What ’s that ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper as [I]_2959-i turn back and look at it . “ A Bugatti Veyron . It ’s a limited edition . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i ca n’t drive this , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper angrily . “ Why not ? ”_[2959-i] “ Well . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i look around in a fluster . “ [I]_2959-i ’m not [a very good driver]_{2986-a very good driver} , [Jameson]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i ’m going to crash this thing for sure . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i laughs , and it ’s deep and velvety and makes [me]_2959-i smile . “ [I]_2959-i assure [you]_2959-i , [Emily]_186-jameson , [anyone]_272-anyone can drive [this car]_{1349-a car} . It practically drives itself . Relax . [You]_2959-i ’ll be fine . ”_[2959-i] “ When [you]_2959-i said [you]_2959-i had [a car]_{1349-a car} , [I]_2959-i thought [you]_2959-i meant [you]_2959-i had a Toyota . . . like [a normal person]_{2988-a normal person} , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer . “ What if [I]_2959-i crash it ? ”_[2959-i] “ As long as [you]_2959-i ’re not injured , [I]_2959-i do n’t care . ”_[2959-i] “ [Jameson]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ [Babe]_190-babe , [I]_2959-i ’m in a staff meeting right now with [twenty people]_{2989-twenty people} sitting [here]_{385-new york} . Get what [you]_2959-i need , and [I]_2959-i ’ll meet [you]_2959-i at [home]_2289-home , ”_[2959-i] [he]_2959-i says calmly . “ Oh [my]_2959-i God , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i cry as [I]_2959-i get an image of all [[his]_2959-i staff]_{1362-his staff} listening . “ Goodbye . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i hang up in a rush . [I]_2959-i come back to [Alan]_246-alan and [Molly]_198-molly , and [they]_1363-they both wait for [me]_2959-i to say something . “ It seems [Jameson]_186-jameson has gone completely crazy , ”_[1363-they] [I]_2959-i whisper as [I]_2959-i stare at the time machine . [Alan]_246-alan chuckles , and [Molly]_198-molly stares at [the car]_{369-the car} in disbelief . “ [I]_2959-i thought it would be a Toyota . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i wince . [Alan]_246-alan smiles and opens [the driver]_{530-the driver} ’s side door . “ [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} does n’t do Toyota , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i get in , and [Molly]_198-molly sits in the passenger seat . “ Where are [you]_186-jameson going ? ”_[246-alan] [Alan]_246-alan asks . “ [Vegas]_27-vegas . ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly laughs . “ [We]_2992-we ’re going to [Vegas]_27-vegas . How much is this car worth , [Alan]_246-alan ? ”_[198-molly] “ It came in at around two million dollars , [I]_198-molly think . ”_[198-molly] “ Holy fuck , ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly shrieks . “ Get in , [Alan]_246-alan ; [we]_2992-we really are going to fucking [Vegas]_27-vegas . ”_[198-molly] [I]_2959-i put [my]_2959-i head down on the steering wheel and burst out laughing . “ This is unbelievable . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_246-alan ’ll be fine . ”_[246-alan] [Alan]_246-alan laughs as [he]_246-alan leans in and starts [the car]_{369-the car} . It purrs like a kitten . “ Blinker , brake , reverse . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan points to all the dials and knobs . “ Take it slow . It flies . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan closes the door , and [I]_2959-i put the blinker on . [I]_2959-i slowly take off into the traffic to the sound of [Molly]_198-molly screaming and laughing in excitement , and as soon as [I]_2959-i get out of sight of [Alan]_246-alan , [I]_2959-i burst out laughing too . “ What the fuck is going on ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i cry . Two hours later , [I]_2959-i pull into [the underground parking lot of [[Jameson]_186-jameson ’s building]_{1368-jameson ’s building}]_{1367-the underground parking lot of jameson ’s building} . [I]_2959-i know why [he]_246-alan takes [the damn limo]_{1369-the damn limo} — finding a parking spot in [this city]_{2-the city} is insane . In the end , [I]_2959-i made [Molly]_198-molly sit in [the car]_{369-the car} in [the parking lot]_{1371-the parking lot} and wait for [me]_2959-i while [I]_2959-i grabbed what [I]_2959-i needed , and then [I]_2959-i drove [her]_198-molly [home]_2289-home . [I]_2959-i was petrified [someone]_2326-someone was going to steal it . [Alan]_246-alan is waiting , and [he]_246-alan guides [me]_2959-i into [the garage]_{2907-the garage} , where [I]_2959-i park . “ Thank [you]_246-alan . ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i smile as [I]_2959-i get the groceries out of the trunk . “ This is [a poser car]_{369-the car} , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer . [He]_246-alan smirks as [he]_246-alan takes the bags from [me]_2959-i , and [we]_1375-we begin walking to [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} . “ Did [you]_246-alan lock [the car]_{369-the car} , [Emily]_186-jameson ? ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan reminds [me]_2959-i . “ Oh yeah . ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i turn and hold the remote up , and it blips as it locks . [I]_2959-i giggle . “ Oops . ”_[2959-i] [We]_1375-we get into [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} , and [he]_246-alan stays silent and looking straight ahead . “ How long have [you]_246-alan worked for [Jameson]_186-jameson ? ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i ask . “ Ten years . ”_[2959-i] “ Oh . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ That ’s a long time . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan smiles . “ Yes , [he]_246-alan ’s very good to [me]_246-alan . ”_[246-alan] [We]_1375-we get to the top , and [Alan]_246-alan opens the door and walks in and puts the groceries on the counter . “ Do [you]_246-alan need anything ? ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan asks . “ [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} is still in [his]_246-alan meeting . [He]_246-alan will be at least another half an hour . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes hold [his]_246-alan , and [I]_2959-i want to ask [him]_246-alan a million questions about the enigmatic [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} . “ Do [you]_246-alan speak to [him]_246-alan often throughout the day ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ No . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan smiles at the suggestion . “ [I]_246-alan am in constant contact with [[his]_246-alan PA]_{2994-his pa} . ”_[246-alan] “ Oh . ”_[246-alan] “ [[His]_246-alan masseuse]_{2994-his pa} is expected here at seven . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan glances at [his]_246-alan watch . “ Would [you]_{2994-his pa} like [me]_246-alan to wait for [her]_{2994-his pa} ? ”_[246-alan] “ [Her]_{2994-his pa} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ Oh . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan corrects [himself]_246-alan . “ It ’s a [him]_246-alan now , is n’t it ? ”_[246-alan] Something tells [me]_2959-i that [Alan]_246-alan knows a lot more about [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} than [he]_246-alan makes out . “ No , [I]_2959-i ’m fine . [I]_2959-i ’ll let [him]_246-alan in . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i fake a smile . “ Thank [you]_246-alan . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i show [him]_246-alan to the door . “ Call [me]_246-alan if [you]_246-alan need anything . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan smiles . “ Okay , thanks . ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i walk back to [the kitchen]_{683-the kitchen} and begin to put the groceries away , and the doorbell chimes . “ Hello , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say as [I]_2959-i push the intercom . “ Hello , [I]_2959-i ’m here for the massage . ”_[2959-i] “ Come up . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i open the door and wait for [him]_246-alan to arrive . “ Hello . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan smiles . “ [Same room]_{1125-same room} as last time ? ”_[246-alan] “ Yes , please . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan takes off down [the hallway]_{1125-same room} to set up . The door clicks open , and [Jameson]_186-jameson comes into view . Every time [I]_2959-i see [him]_246-alan in a suit , [I]_2959-i am reminded of exactly who [he]_246-alan is . [Power personified]_{1379-power personified} . “ Hello . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan smiles as [he]_246-alan takes [me]_2959-i into [his]_246-alan arms . “ Hi . ”_[246-alan] [His]_246-alan lips dust [mine]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i melt into [his]_246-alan touch . “ [[Your]_246-alan car]_{399-sky bar} is ridiculous . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . [He]_246-alan chuckles as [he]_246-alan takes [my]_2959-i jaw in [his]_246-alan hand ; then [he]_246-alan kisses [me]_2959-i deeper , and [my]_2959-i hands go around [his]_246-alan broad neck . The intercom sounds again . “ For [God]_0-aaron ’s sake , [this place]_{399-sky bar} is like [an airport]_{2996-an airport} , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper , annoyed that [my]_2959-i kiss is being interrupted . “ Oh , that ’s the stylists with [your]_2997-your dresses , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan says . “ [Your]_2997-your masseuse is set up in [the end room]_{2998-the end room} . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan kisses [me]_2959-i again . “ Let them in , and choose what [you]_2997-your want . ”_[246-alan] “ [Jay]_108-jay , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper as [my]_2959-i eyes search [his]_246-alan . This change in [him]_246-alan is confusing [me]_2959-i . “ Get a few . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan grabs [my]_2959-i behind . “ [I]_246-alan ’m going to take a quick shower . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan disappears up [the hall]_{611-the hall} , and [I]_2959-i open the front door . [My]_2959-i face falls when [I]_2959-i see [the two gorgeous women]_{1381-the two gorgeous women} pushing a huge garment rack of gorgeous dresses . “ Hello . ”_{[1381-the two gorgeous women]} One is tall with long dark hair , and the other is blonde and beautiful . Both have that trendy , confident vibe . “ Hello , [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} ordered some dresses , ”_{[1382-the blonde]} [the blonde]_{1382-the blonde} says . “ [I]_{1382-the blonde} ’m [Celeste]_191-celeste , and this is [Saba]_192-saba . ”_{[1382-the blonde]} “ Yes , please come in , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper , embarrassed . “ [I]_{1381-the two gorgeous women} ’m [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_{[1381-the two gorgeous women]} [We]_{1381-the two gorgeous women} shake hands . God , do n’t tell [me]_2959-i [they]_{1381-the two gorgeous women} are going to watch [me]_2959-i try this shit on ? How mortifying . “ Just in here . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i show [them]_{1381-the two gorgeous women} to [the living area]_{765-the living area} , and [they]_{1381-the two gorgeous women} start to unpack shoes and accessories as [I]_2959-i watch awkwardly . This seems all very over the top . “ Back in a moment . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . [I]_2959-i turn and take off up to [the bedroom]_{300-the bathroom} , and [I]_2959-i burst into [the bathroom]_{300-the bathroom} to find [Jay]_108-jay washing under the shower . “ What the hell is going on ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper in a panic . “ What ? ”_[108-jay] [He]_108-jay frowns , totally oblivious . “ [Two Penthouse Pets]_{2999-two penthouse pets} are out there with a load of dresses that are way too exotic for [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i ’m driving around in a fucking space machine , and [you]_3000-you ’re saying [I]_2959-i ’m moving in , and [I]_2959-i ’m freaking the fucking hell out , [Jameson]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i blurt out in a rush . [He]_108-jay smirks as [he]_108-jay turns the taps off . “ Just go out there , and pick what [you]_3000-you like , [Emily]_186-jameson . Do n’t overthink this . ”_[108-jay] “ Do n’t overthink this , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ It ’s overthunk already . ”_[2959-i] “ [Overthunk]_{193-overthunk} is n’t a word , ”_[108-jay] [he]_108-jay says casually as [he]_108-jay dries [himself]_108-jay . “ Oh [my]_108-jay God , ”_[108-jay] [I]_2959-i stammer in a fluster at [his]_108-jay lack of care , and [I]_2959-i storm back out to [the stylists]_{1385-the stylists} . “ Sorry , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say as [I]_2959-i stand next to the rack of clothes . [I]_2959-i twist [my]_2959-i fingers nervously in front of [me]_2959-i . “ Tell [me]_0-aaron about [your]_0-aaron style . ”_[0-aaron] [The blonde]_0-aaron smiles . “ What makes [you]_0-aaron pop ? ”_[0-aaron] [I]_2959-i stare at [her]_0-aaron . Oh jeez . What the fuck is this bullshit ? “ Umm . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i look at the dresses on the rack . “ What makes [you]_0-aaron come alive and feel sexy ? ”_[0-aaron] [the brunette gushes]_0-aaron . “ When are [you]_0-aaron living [your]_0-aaron best life ? ”_[0-aaron] Oh , [Jesus]_107-jesus . . . not this . “ [I]_0-aaron ’ll just”—I_[0-aaron] gesture to the rack of clothes—“see what [I]_2959-i like . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i begin to flick through the dresses . Wow . . . [they]_1387-they ’re all beautiful . “ Anything [you]_0-aaron like , [sweetheart]_0-aaron ? ”_[1387-they] [I]_2959-i hear [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s deep voice purr from behind [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i turn to see [him]_186-jameson with a white towel around [his]_186-jameson waist . [His]_186-jameson hair is wet , and [his]_186-jameson tanned muscles are bulging . [He]_186-jameson looks fucking edible . [The two bimbos]_{1388-the two bimbos} ’ eyes bulge from [their]_{1388-the two bimbos} sockets . “ Hello , [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} , ”_{[1388-the two bimbos]} [they]_{1388-the two bimbos} both stammer as [their]_{1388-the two bimbos} eyes drop down [his]_186-jameson body . “ Hello . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson smiles sexily . [I]_2959-i look at [him]_186-jameson deadpan . Is [he]_186-jameson for real ? “ [I]_2959-i ’m not sure . [I]_2959-i like everything , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap as [I]_2959-i turn back to the rack . In a fucking towel . . . what next ? [Ugh]_61-ugh . [He]_186-jameson comes behind [me]_2959-i and puts one hand on [my]_2959-i hip as [he]_186-jameson goes through the rack . “ [We]_3001-we ’ll take this one , this one . . . this one . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson scans the rest of the rack . “ And all of these from here on . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Yes , [sir]_186-jameson , ”_{[1388-the two bimbos]} [they]_{1388-the two bimbos} both gush . [His]_186-jameson eyes go over the shoes and lingerie [they]_{1388-the two bimbos} have laid out on the coffee table . “ [We]_3001-we ’ll take all of the lingerie and whatever shoes [Emily]_186-jameson chooses . ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson eyes come to [me]_2959-i , and [he]_186-jameson smiles and leans in and kisses [me]_2959-i . “ Done . ”_{[905-the girls]} [The two women]_{905-the girls} hold [their]_{905-the girls} breath as [they]_{905-the girls} watch . [His]_186-jameson hand drops to [my]_2959-i behind , and [he]_186-jameson gives [me]_2959-i a firm squeeze . “ Nice to meet [you]_2959-i , [girls]_{905-the girls} , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson says before [he]_186-jameson saunters up [the hall]_{611-the hall} for [his]_186-jameson massage . [I]_2959-i turn back to [the girls]_{905-the girls} as [they]_{905-the girls} watch [him]_186-jameson disappear in awe . Good grief . [I]_2959-i think [I]_2959-i just met the real [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson . . . in all [his]_186-jameson glory . Chapter 17 [I]_2959-i stir the mushroom sauce with [my]_2959-i mind in overdrive . [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s different . . . [I]_2959-i ’m talking Twilight Zone different . [I]_2959-i ’m not sure if it ’s a good thing or the beginning of the end for [us]_1391-we . Just when [I]_2959-i get used to [his]_186-jameson old weirdness , [he]_186-jameson ups the ante . [The masseuse]_{1392-the masseuse} has just left , and [he]_186-jameson ’s in the shower again as [he]_186-jameson washes the oil off . [I]_2959-i ’m not going in there because [we]_1391-we will end up having sex , and dinner is nearly ready . . . and [I]_2959-i want to talk to [him]_186-jameson without [my]_2959-i arousal high clouding [my]_2959-i brain cells . It happens a lot with [him]_186-jameson . [He]_186-jameson walks back out in [his]_186-jameson towel , and [his]_186-jameson eyes find [me]_2959-i across [the room]_{514-the room} . [He]_186-jameson gives [me]_2959-i a slow , sexy smile . “ Can [you]_3002-you not walk around in a towel when [we]_1391-we have visitors , please ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i snap . [He]_186-jameson smirks . “ [Those two ditzy shoppers]_{3003-those two ditzy shoppers} are at [home]_2289-home going to [town]_2456-town on [their]_{3003-those two ditzy shoppers} vibrators at this very moment as [they]_{3003-those two ditzy shoppers} picture [you]_3002-you in that white towel . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes . “ Living their”—I_[2959-i] hold [my]_2959-i fingers up to accentuate [my]_2959-i point—“best life . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson chuckles as [he]_186-jameson takes [me]_2959-i in [his]_186-jameson arms . “ Jealous ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Yes , [I]_2959-i am , actually . [I]_2959-i do n’t like [other women looking at [you]_3002-you]_{3006-other women looking at you} . It makes [me]_2959-i stabby , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap as [I]_2959-i stir the sauce . “ Cut it out with the sexy smiling around [other women]_{1002-other women} too . ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson lips come to [my]_2959-i neck as [he]_186-jameson holds [me]_2959-i from behind , and [I]_2959-i can feel [his]_186-jameson erection up against [my]_2959-i behind . “ Let ’s go to bed . ”_[2959-i] “ No , [you]_186-jameson ’re eating first . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i point to the kitchen counter . “ Sit . ”_[2959-i] [His]_186-jameson eyes dance in delight , and [he]_186-jameson does as [he]_186-jameson ’s told . [I]_2959-i place [his]_186-jameson dinner in front of [him]_186-jameson . “ Hmm , looks good . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson smiles . [I]_2959-i sit beside [him]_186-jameson and watch [him]_186-jameson for a moment as [he]_186-jameson eats . “ Why did [you]_186-jameson ask [Alan]_246-alan to move [my]_186-jameson stuff in here ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson chews [his]_186-jameson steak . “ Because [I]_186-jameson want [you]_186-jameson to move in . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Since when ? [We]_3008-we have n’t discussed this at all . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Yes , [we]_3008-we have . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson swallows [his]_186-jameson food . “ [We]_3008-we talked about it this morning . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ When ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ When [I]_2959-i told [you]_186-jameson that [I]_2959-i wanted to do this , and [you]_186-jameson said [me]_2959-i too . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_186-jameson , [my]_2959-i mind a clusterfuck of confusion . “ [Jameson]_186-jameson , doing this is in [my]_186-jameson mind holding hands in public and dating . Maybe meeting [[each other]_{2339-each other} ’s families]_{2339-each other} . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson frowns as [he]_186-jameson watches [me]_2959-i . “ What ’s with the sudden change ? Last week [you]_186-jameson got angry with [me]_186-jameson for falling in love with [you]_186-jameson . [I]_186-jameson could n’t even look at [you]_186-jameson after sex without [you]_186-jameson getting upset with [me]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson sips [his]_186-jameson wine , obviously annoyed . “ [You]_186-jameson said [you]_186-jameson did n’t love [me]_186-jameson . Are [you]_186-jameson saying that now [you]_186-jameson do ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ That ’s not the point . [You]_186-jameson know what [I]_186-jameson mean . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [I]_186-jameson want [us]_3010-us to make a go of it . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson shrugs . “ So today [I]_186-jameson moved forward with [my]_186-jameson plans . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Plans ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ [I]_186-jameson ’m not a business transaction , [Jameson]_186-jameson . [You]_186-jameson do n’t move forward with [your]_186-jameson plans without talking to [me]_186-jameson first . [They]_3011-they are n’t just [your]_186-jameson plans , [you]_186-jameson know . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson clenches [his]_186-jameson jaw , unimpressed , as [his]_186-jameson eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ There are two people in this relationship , [Jay]_108-jay , and [me]_186-jameson loving [you]_186-jameson does not mean [you]_186-jameson get to take [me]_186-jameson over . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [I]_186-jameson know that , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson snaps . “ So [you]_186-jameson do love [me]_186-jameson now ? Make up [your]_186-jameson mind , [woman]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Stop changing the subject . Do [you]_186-jameson understand what [I]_186-jameson ’m saying to [you]_186-jameson ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Yes , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson sighs as if [he]_186-jameson ’s getting lectured by [the school principal]_{1394-the school principal} . “ [I]_2959-i just do n’t know why [you]_186-jameson ’ve had this sudden change of heart . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug . “ It ’s peculiar . ”_[2959-i] “ [My]_2959-i heart has n’t changed at all . [My]_2959-i situation has . ”_[2959-i] “ What does that mean ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . [He]_186-jameson exhales heavily . “ [I]_186-jameson went and saw [Claudia]_57-claudia in [London]_6-london . ”_{[186-jameson]} Oh no , [[his]_186-jameson ex]_{289-my ex} . [I]_2959-i ’m not supposed to know that . [I]_2959-i had better play dumb . “ Who ’s [Claudia]_57-claudia ? ”_[2959-i] “ [[My]_2959-i ex]_{289-my ex} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown as [I]_2959-i try [my]_2959-i hardest to hold [my]_2959-i tongue . Act calm , act calm . “ [I]_2959-i broke it off with [her]_57-claudia . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes widen in horror . “ What the hell ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . “ [You]_57-claudia were still with [her]_57-claudia ? ”_[2959-i] “ No , but [we]_3012-we had promised each other that [we]_3012-we would n’t date [anyone else seriously]_{3013-anyone else seriously} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i begin to break into a cold sweat as [I]_2959-i try to hold it together . “ Why ? ”_[2959-i] “ Because [we]_3012-we planned on getting back together in a few years . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i knew it ; [I]_2959-i knew it back then that something was off . Damn it , why did n’t [I]_2959-i see the writing on the wall ? [I]_2959-i pick up [my]_2959-i wineglass and drain it as [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} . Jeez , this is news . Bad news . “ [I]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} told [her]_57-claudia [I]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} have strong feelings for [you]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} . ”_{[1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in]} “ [You]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} did ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown as a tiny piece of hope blooms in [my]_2959-i chest . [He]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} smiles and tucks a piece of hair behind [my]_2959-i ear . “ [I]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} did . ”_{[1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in]} “ What else did [you]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} say ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask calmly . [I]_2959-i want to blurt out a million questions about [the two of [them]_{2419-the two of them}]_{2419-the two of them} . “ That it was over between [us]_{2419-the two of them} . ”_[2959-i] “ Did [you]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} love [her]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} ? ”_{[1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in]} “ Yes . ”_{[1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in]} [He]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} pauses for a moment as if contemplating that statement . “ In [my]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} own way , [I]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} did . In hindsight , [I]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} realize that [our]_{2419-the two of them} relationship was never normal . Not like [ours]_{2419-the two of them} is anyway . ”_{[1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in]} [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} , lost for words . Grateful that [he]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} ’s finally being honest and yet terrified that [their]_1398-their union was so strong that it withstood an open relationship . There ’s no way in hell [I]_2959-i could ever do that . “ [You]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} think [our]_{2419-the two of them} relationship is normal ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . [He]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} smiles and leans in and kisses [me]_2959-i softly . “ Do n’t [you]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} ? ”_{[1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in]} “ No . To [me]_2959-i [our]_{2419-the two of them} relationship is exciting and wonderful and exotic . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} . “ Normal gets boring very quick , [Jameson]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} told [her]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} that [I]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} want to build a future with [you]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} . ”_{[1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in]} Okay , that sounds a bit better . [I]_2959-i smirk as [I]_2959-i try to hold in a smile . “ [I]_2959-i also told [her]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} that [I]_2959-i ’ve had feelings for [you]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} since the day [we]_{2419-the two of them} met and that [you]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} are [the only woman [I]_2959-i want to be with from here on in]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} . ”_[2959-i] A broad , goofy smile does break through this time . “ Did [you]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} tell [her]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} [I]_2959-i had motorized sneakers ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [He]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} chuckles , and [his]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} eyes twinkle with something special as [he]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} cups [my]_2959-i face in [his]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} hand . “ [I]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} did . ”_{[1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in]} “ What does this mean , [Jay]_108-jay ? ”_{[1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in]} [My]_2959-i eyes search [his]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} . “ For [us]_{2419-the two of them} . ”_{[1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in]} “ It means that [I]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} ’m all [yours]_2959-i . ”_{[1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in]} [He]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} shrugs . “ If [you]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} want [me]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} . ”_{[1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in]} What ? All [mine]_2959-i ? [I]_2959-i blink . . . in shock . “ Have [you]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} been holding [yourself]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} back from [me]_2959-i all this time ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} have , and [I]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} ca n’t do it any longer . ”_{[1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in]} “ What does this mean . . . for [us]_{2419-the two of them} ? ”_[2959-i] “ It means [I]_2959-i want [you]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} to move in , and [we]_{2419-the two of them} go full steam ahead from here . ”_[2959-i] “ What ’s the rush ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ Ca n’t [we]_{2419-the two of them} ease into it ? ”_{[1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in]} [He]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} leans in and kisses [me]_2959-i softly ; [his]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} big blue eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ [I]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} do n’t do things in halves , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_{[1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in]} “ Meaning ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ Meaning that [[my]_2959-i woman]_186-jameson is [my]_2959-i world . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} as the air leaves [my]_2959-i lungs . “ [I]_2959-i work hard . . . but [I]_2959-i love harder . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i heartbeat sounds through [my]_2959-i ears . Is this really happening ? “ [I]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} ’m in love with [you]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} , [Emily Foster]_186-jameson . ”_{[1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in]} [He]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} leans in and kisses [me]_2959-i slowly . [His]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} tongue swipes through [my]_2959-i open lips with such emotion that [I]_2959-i get a lump in [my]_2959-i throat . “ [I]_1399-i ca n’t help it . [I]_1399-i tried to stop it , and [I]_1399-i could n’t . [I]_1399-i think [I]_1399-i ’ve loved [you]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} since [our]_3014-our first night together in [Boston]_{385-new york} . [You]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} stayed with [me]_1399-i . [I]_1399-i fought it , and still , [I]_1399-i could n’t forget [you]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} . [I]_1399-i ’ve been carrying [your]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} scarf around like [a lovesick fool]_{3015-a lovesick fool} for more than a year . ”_[1399-i] [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_1399-i . “ So please forgive [me]_2959-i if [I]_2959-i want to go full steam ahead . This is not a snap decision . It ’s been coming for a long time , and now that [I]_2959-i ’m in a position to act on it , [I]_2959-i do n’t want to waste any more time . [I]_2959-i want [you]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} with [me]_2959-i . By [my]_2959-i side . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_1399-i while [my]_2959-i brain catches up . What the . . . ? [Holy shit]_{69-holy fucking shit} . [He]_1399-i picks up [his]_1399-i knife and fork . “ Now [I]_1399-i ’m going to eat [his]_1399-i beautiful dinner that [you]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} ’ve made for [me]_1399-i , and then [I]_1399-i ’m going to take [you]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} to bed and make [you]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} forget everything that [I]_1399-i said to [you]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} about not falling for [me]_1399-i , and then , hopefully , [you]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} can show [me]_1399-i that [you]_{1396-the only woman i want to be with from here on in} have some kind of resemblance of feelings for [me]_1399-i too . ”_[1399-i] [I]_2959-i smile as [my]_2959-i heart swells . “ Okay ? ”_[1399-i] [he]_1399-i asks before [he]_1399-i takes a mouthful of food . “ Okay . ”_[1399-i] [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i wine with a shaky hand . [I]_2959-i look down at [my]_2959-i dinner and smirk . Mushroom sauce . . . [my]_2959-i new love potion . [Abracadabra]_{194-abracadabra} . [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson just blew [my]_2959-i fucking mind . [I]_2959-i roll over and put [my]_2959-i hand out , and [I]_2959-i frown . [Jameson]_186-jameson is n’t in bed beside [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i glance over at the clock : 3:33 a.m. Where is [he]_186-jameson ? [I]_2959-i get out of bed and walk down [the hall]_{514-the room} in search of [[my]_2959-i man]_186-jameson . The kitchen light is on . Hmm , but no [Jay]_108-jay . [I]_2959-i walk down to [the other end of [the apartment]_{2627-the apartment}]_{1401-the other end of the apartment} and see the light coming from [[his]_186-jameson office]_{426-his office} , and [I]_2959-i tiptoe up [the hall]_{514-the room} . [Jameson]_186-jameson is sitting at [his]_186-jameson desk ; [his]_186-jameson thumbnail rubs back and forth over [his]_186-jameson bottom lip as [he]_186-jameson stares at the computer screen as it lights up [the room]_{514-the room} . [I]_2959-i stand silently at the door as [I]_2959-i watch [him]_186-jameson . [He]_186-jameson ’s frowning , deep in concentration . What ’s waking [him]_186-jameson up in the middle of the night ? What ’s [he]_186-jameson worried about ? For five minutes , [I]_2959-i watch [him]_186-jameson in silence . [I]_2959-i can feel the worry oozing out of [him]_186-jameson . Finally , [I]_2959-i can take it no more . “ Hey , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [He]_186-jameson glances up , startled . “ Hello , [sweetheart]_2959-i . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson smiles softly . [I]_2959-i walk over and look over [his]_186-jameson shoulder at the screen . It displays a graph with a red line that gradually declines . Stock Value : Miles Media . Shit . [I]_2959-i climb onto [his]_186-jameson lap and kiss [his]_186-jameson lips softly . “ [You]_186-jameson ca n’t sleep ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson runs [his]_186-jameson hand down [my]_2959-i naked back . “ [I]_186-jameson ’m fine . ”_{[186-jameson]} But [he]_186-jameson ’s not fine — [his]_186-jameson company ’s value is plummeting . How many millions did [[his]_186-jameson family]_{1404-his family} lose today ? “ Any news ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper as [I]_2959-i stare at the graph in front of [me]_2959-i . “ On ? ”_[2959-i] “ The case ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson shakes [his]_186-jameson head . [His]_186-jameson jaw ticks in anger as [his]_186-jameson eyes go back to the graph . [He]_186-jameson ’s like a raging ball of anxiety ; [I]_2959-i can almost feel [his]_186-jameson pain . [I]_2959-i need to make [him]_186-jameson forget this for the moment . [I]_2959-i kiss [his]_186-jameson neck , and [he]_186-jameson smiles as [I]_2959-i softly nip down to [his]_186-jameson collarbone . [I]_2959-i drop to the floor between [his]_186-jameson legs , and [he]_186-jameson looks down at [me]_2959-i as [he]_186-jameson runs [his]_186-jameson hand through [my]_2959-i hair . Emotion runs between [us]_1405-us , electricity [I]_2959-i ca n’t explain . “ [I]_2959-i missed [you]_2959-i when [you]_2959-i were away , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper as [I]_2959-i slowly slide [his]_186-jameson boxers off . [He]_186-jameson smiles softly as [I]_2959-i kiss [his]_186-jameson dick . It flexes in approval . “ [I]_2959-i missed [[my]_2959-i man]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper as [I]_2959-i take [him]_186-jameson in [my]_2959-i mouth . “ [My]_2959-i body missed [you]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i need to make [him]_186-jameson forget where [he]_186-jameson is , who [he]_186-jameson is . This stress has to leave . Now [I]_2959-i want to be [that spontaneous woman [he]_186-jameson met twelve months ago]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} , [the one who blew [his]_186-jameson mind]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} . [He]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} inhales sharply and spreads [his]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} legs , granting [me]_2959-i access . [Our]_1407-our eyes are locked as [I]_2959-i suck on the most private part of [his]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} body , the one that [nobody]_2321-nobody gets to see . [He]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} ’s thick and hard , and [I]_2959-i can see every vein on [his]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} engorged length . [I]_2959-i lick up [his]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} length and then flick [my]_2959-i tongue over [his]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} end , and [I]_2959-i can almost hear the arousal as it runs through [his]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} body like a river rapid . “ Fuck [my]_2959-i mouth , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper as [I]_2959-i watch [him]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} . [His]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} eyes darken . “ Take [my]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} hair in [your]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} hands , and fuck [my]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} mouth , ”_{[1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago]} [I]_2959-i murmur around [him]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} . [His]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} eyes dance with fire , and [he]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} grabs [my]_2959-i hair in both hands and surges forward . [I]_2959-i ’m blessed with a burst of preejaculate , and [I]_2959-i close [my]_2959-i eyes and moan . [He]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} begins to slide [his]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} cock deep down [my]_2959-i throat , and [I]_2959-i hum around [him]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} . What must [I]_2959-i look like , on [my]_2959-i hands and knees , naked , under [[my]_2959-i boyfriend]_{2490-my boyfriend} ’s desk ? [My]_2959-i own arousal takes shape , and [I]_2959-i spread [my]_2959-i legs , and [he]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} moans as [he]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} begins to really pump . [I]_2959-i take [him]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} in [my]_2959-i hand , and [my]_2959-i fist follows [my]_2959-i mouth as [I]_2959-i begin to work [him]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} hard . [He]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} needs it hard . [I]_2959-i can see every muscle contract in [his]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} stomach as [he]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} clenches , and [I]_2959-i push [his]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} legs open farther and take [his]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} balls in [my]_2959-i hand . “ Fuck , ”_{[1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago]} [he]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} moans . “ Come , ”_{[1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago]} [I]_2959-i whisper . “ Blow . [I]_2959-i want to drink [you]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} down . ”_[2959-i] [His]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} eyes roll back in [his]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} head , and [he]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} really lets [me]_2959-i have it . [I]_2959-i smile around [him]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} . [I]_2959-i love it when [I]_2959-i bring [him]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} undone like this . It ’s like [I]_2959-i hover up in the air and watch with a special detachment . [An audience of one]_{1410-an audience of one} — the best porn on [the planet]_{994-the planet} . [His]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} stomach contracts , and [I]_2959-i smile as [he]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} shoots down [my]_2959-i throat . [I]_2959-i concentrate on not gagging . It ’s hard with a cock this big , but when [he]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} opens [his]_{1406-that spontaneous woman he met twelve months ago} eyes , [they]_1412-they ’re blazing . . . and all [my]_2959-i fears are laid to rest . This is what [I]_2959-i love . [I]_2959-i love loving [Jameson]_186-jameson with the unbridled passion that [he]_186-jameson brings out in [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i ’ve never been [this woman]_57-claudia before , but with [him]_186-jameson . . . it ’s natural . As if [he]_186-jameson was the missing link in [my]_2959-i sexuality . [We]_1414-our ’ve already had sex once earlier tonight , and that time was intimate and loving . Nothing like this , but just as important . [I]_2959-i keep working [him]_186-jameson , emptying [his]_186-jameson beautiful body until [he]_186-jameson drags [me]_2959-i up to [him]_186-jameson and spreads [me]_2959-i over [his]_186-jameson lap . [His]_186-jameson lips take [mine]_2959-i , and [he]_186-jameson moans as [he]_186-jameson tastes [himself]_186-jameson in [my]_2959-i mouth . [I]_2959-i pull back to look at [him]_186-jameson , the air between [us]_1414-our electric , and [our]_1414-our eyes lock . “ [I]_2959-i love [you]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [He]_186-jameson smiles , and then [his]_186-jameson lips crash to [mine]_2959-i . [Our]_1414-our kiss is desperate , and [he]_186-jameson stands and carries [me]_2959-i down [the hall]_{611-the hall} back to bed as [I]_2959-i cling to [him]_186-jameson . [Our]_1414-our attachment is deep . So deep . For the first time in [my]_2959-i life , [I]_2959-i feel like [I]_2959-i ’m [home]_2289-home . [I]_2959-i sit and watch [Hayden]_266-jim walk across [the street]_{550-the street} toward the café [we]_1414-our are in . [He]_266-jim ’s carrying a briefcase . Why would [he]_266-jim need [his]_266-jim briefcase on [his]_266-jim lunch break ? [This guy]_266-jim is suspicious as all hell . “ How long have [you]_1418-her known [Hayden]_266-jim , [Moll]_198-molly ? ”_[266-jim] [I]_2959-i ask [her]_1418-her . [Aaron]_0-aaron sips [his]_0-aaron drink through [his]_0-aaron straw as [he]_0-aaron listens and watches [Hayden]_266-jim . [The three of [us]_1414-our]_{525-the three of us} are at [our]_1414-our favorite lunch spot and sitting at the bench by the window . [She]_1418-her gives [me]_2959-i a lopsided twist of [her]_1418-her lips . “ About eight years , [I]_1418-her think . ”_[1418-her] “ [Aaron]_0-aaron said that [you]_0-aaron used to work with [him]_266-jim at [your]_0-aaron old job . ”_[1418-her] “ Yeah . ”_[1418-her] [She]_1418-her chews [her]_1418-her toasted sandwich as [she]_1418-her watches [him]_266-jim . “ [He]_266-jim worked at the Gazette with [me]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i attention goes back to watching [him]_266-jim . “ [You]_0-aaron know , [I]_2959-i think [he]_266-jim ’s up to something . ”_[2959-i] “ Would n’t surprise [me]_1418-her . ”_[1418-her] [She]_1418-her wipes [her]_1418-her mouth with [her]_1418-her napkin . “ Why do [you]_0-aaron say that ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ [He]_266-jim was fired from [the Gazette]_{596-the gazette} . ”_[2959-i] “ What for ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron frowns . “ [I]_0-aaron do n’t know for certain , but the word on [the street]_{550-the street} was that [he]_266-jim was involved in a phone - tap scandal . ”_[0-aaron] “ What ? ”_[2959-i] “ Apparently . ”_[1418-her] [She]_1418-her rolls [her]_1418-her eyes . “ And this is complete speculation , but [he]_266-jim was caught tapping one of [his]_266-jim coworkers ’ phones and stealing [her]_1418-her leads . ”_[1418-her] [My]_2959-i eyes widen . “ Really ? Who ? ”_[1418-her] “ [A girl named [Keeley May]_198-molly]_{927-the redhead} . ”_[0-aaron] “ Oh yes , [the redhead]_{927-the redhead} , ”_[0-aaron] remarks [Aaron]_0-aaron . “ [She]_{927-the redhead} ’s fucking hot . ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly ’s and [my]_2959-i eyes go to [him]_0-aaron . “ Since when do [you]_{927-the redhead} think [girls]_2675-girls are hot ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly asks . “ [I]_0-aaron ’m gay , not blind . [I]_0-aaron can appreciate a fine female form , ”_[0-aaron] [he]_0-aaron huffs . [We]_1420-we both roll [our]_1420-we eyes . “ Why do [you]_{927-the redhead} think [he]_0-aaron ’s up to something ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly asks . [God]_0-aaron , can [I]_2959-i tell [them]_1421-them ? No . . . [I]_2959-i have to run it past [Tristan]_2430-tristan first . [I]_2959-i ca n’t break [their]_1421-them trust in [me]_2959-i . “ [I]_2959-i told [him]_0-aaron one of [my]_2959-i stories the other day , and [I]_2959-i saw that [he]_0-aaron submitted it as [his]_0-aaron own , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i lie . [Molly]_198-molly narrows [her]_198-molly eyes . “ Fucking snake . ”_[198-molly] “ [I]_2959-i have no proof , of course , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i add . “ [I]_2959-i was just wondering about [his]_0-aaron character , that ’s all . ”_[2959-i] “ From what [I]_198-molly know of [him]_0-aaron , ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly says dryly , “ [I]_198-molly would n’t trust [him]_0-aaron as far as [I]_198-molly could throw [him]_0-aaron . ”_[198-molly] “ Like [Paul]_101-paul , ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron sneers . “ Oh God , what happened now ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ Nothing . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron sighs . “ [He]_0-aaron ’s just [an asshole]_{662-an asshole} , that ’s all . ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly rolls [her]_198-molly eyes in disgust . “ [You]_198-molly know what , [Aaron]_0-aaron , stop playing [the fucking victim here]_{3021-the fucking victim here} . [You]_198-molly know [he]_0-aaron ’s sleeping around , and [you]_198-molly ’re still sleeping with [him]_0-aaron . It ’s one thing to be deceived , but to willingly go back for more when [you]_198-molly know exactly what is going on is just plain pathetic . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron rolls [his]_0-aaron eyes . “ [You]_198-molly do n’t have to be such a bitch about it . ”_[0-aaron] “ Yeah , [I]_1422-i do . [You]_198-molly ’re acting like a damsel in distress . [You]_198-molly do n’t have [kids]_2541-kids with [him]_0-aaron . [You]_198-molly do n’t have a mortgage . [You]_198-molly do n’t work with [him]_0-aaron . The break would be easy . Tell [him]_0-aaron to fuck off and move on , ”_[1422-i] [she]_1422-i scoffs . “ [Breakups]_195-breakups are hard . Staying with [an asshole]_{662-an asshole} is harder . ”_[1422-i] “ Speaking of moving on — [Jameson]_186-jameson asked [me]_2959-i to move in with [him]_0-aaron , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say to change the subject . [Aaron]_0-aaron snorts [his]_0-aaron drink , and it goes up [his]_0-aaron nose . “ What the hell ? ”_[0-aaron] “ Apparently . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug . [Aaron]_0-aaron frowns . “ What ’s with the turnabout ? ”_[0-aaron] “ [He]_0-aaron went and saw [Claudia]_57-claudia , [[his]_0-aaron ex]_{1395-his ex} , while [he]_0-aaron was in [London]_6-london . ”_[0-aaron] “ Did [he]_0-aaron fuck [her]_57-claudia ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron asks as [he]_0-aaron chews [his]_0-aaron straw . “ No , [Aaron]_0-aaron , [fucking other people]_{3025-fucking other people} is n’t normal behavior , ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly snaps . “ Get that through [your]_0-aaron thick head . [Your]_0-aaron view on reality is seriously distorted . ”_[198-molly] “ Fuck , [you]_0-aaron ’re [a real bitch]_{3026-a real bitch} today , [you]_0-aaron know that ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron snaps . “ Well , that communal dick of [[your]_0-aaron boyfriend]_{2443-your boyfriend} ’s is pissing [me]_198-molly off , ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly scoffs . [Aaron]_0-aaron and [I]_2959-i roll [our]_1423-our eyes . [Molly]_198-molly is especially testy today . “ [He]_0-aaron said that [he]_0-aaron and [Claudia]_57-claudia had planned on getting back together , but [he]_0-aaron told [her]_57-claudia [he]_0-aaron wanted a future with [me]_198-molly . [He]_0-aaron ended it . ”_[198-molly] “ Holy shit , ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron whispers . “ [He]_0-aaron told [me]_0-aaron [he]_0-aaron loves [me]_0-aaron . ”_[0-aaron] “ What the fuck ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly cries . “ Are [you]_198-molly serious ? ”_[198-molly] “ But . . . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug . “ But what ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron whispers . “ There should be no buts anywhere in this story . ”_[0-aaron] “ It ’s all so fast . What ’s the rush , [you]_198-molly know ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug . “ [I]_1424-i ’m scared [he]_0-aaron ’s just stressed . ”_[1424-i] [They]_1424-i both continue to listen . “ [He]_0-aaron told [me]_1424-i that [he]_0-aaron ’s had feelings since [we]_1424-i first met , and it ’s been coming for a long time . ”_[1424-i] “ That could be true . ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly frowns . “ It could be . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i coffee . “ It could also be in [his]_0-aaron takeover strategy . ”_[2959-i] “ What takeover strategy ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly frowns . “ [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson gets what [he]_0-aaron wants , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reply . “ If [he]_0-aaron ’s decided [he]_0-aaron wants [me]_2959-i — ”_[2959-i] “ Which [he]_0-aaron has , ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron interrupts . “ [He]_0-aaron will make it happen . [I]_2959-i do n’t know . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug . “ It just all seems too good to be true , and the whole [Claudia]_57-claudia situation has freaked [me]_198-molly out a little . Can [I]_198-molly really believe that [Claudia]_57-claudia and [he]_0-aaron will just break off all communication now ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly rolls [her]_198-molly eyes . “ Here [we]_3028-we go . Have [[you]_198-molly two idiots]_{3029-you two idiots} been sniffing ink cartridges today ? ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly screws up [her]_198-molly napkin with force . “ Stop being [a fucking negative bitch]_{3030-a fucking negative bitch} . If [he]_0-aaron did n’t tell [you]_198-molly [he]_0-aaron loved [you]_198-molly , that would have been a problem . Now that [he]_0-aaron has , [he]_0-aaron has an ulterior motive . ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly throws [her]_198-molly hands up in disgust . “ Will [you]_198-molly two come back to [Earth]_28-earth ? ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly gets up . “ [We]_3031-we have to get back . ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly storms out , and [Aaron]_0-aaron and [I]_2959-i watch [her]_198-molly cross [the street]_{550-the street} . “ [She]_198-molly needs a good deep dicking , ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron mutters . “ [She]_198-molly ’s in full bitch mode . ”_[0-aaron] [I]_2959-i giggle as [I]_2959-i watch [her]_198-molly walk into [the building]_{361-the building} . “ [You]_198-molly could be right . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stare at [my]_2959-i reflection in the mirror and exhale heavily . [I]_2959-i turn and check [my]_2959-i behind . [I]_2959-i ’m wearing a gold Chanel dress that [Jameson]_186-jameson picked off the rack yesterday . [My]_2959-i long dark hair is set into large curls and pinned behind one ear , and [my]_2959-i makeup is glamorous with glossy red lips . [I]_2959-i ’m nervous as all hell . This is the first time [I]_2959-i ’ve ever been anywhere formal with [him]_186-jameson as [his]_186-jameson date . . . and of course , [[his]_186-jameson whole family]_{1427-his whole family} is going to be there to witness it . Could be a complete disaster . Just do n’t spill anything on [your]_1428-your dress or drink too much champagne and be embarrassing , [I]_2959-i remind [myself]_2959-i . [God]_0-aaron , [I]_2959-i could n’t cope . The worst thing is , because [I]_2959-i ’m so nervous , [I]_2959-i want to power drink . “ Are [you]_2959-i nearly ready , [my]_186-jameson fuck bunny ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson calls . [He]_186-jameson appears around the door and gives [me]_2959-i a slow , sexy smile as [his]_186-jameson eyes drop down the length of [my]_2959-i body . “ [Jesus]_107-jesus , [you]_107-jesus look beautiful . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i brush [my]_2959-i hands nervously over [my]_2959-i thighs . “ Is this okay ? ”_[2959-i] “ Perfect . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson takes [me]_2959-i in [his]_186-jameson arms and kisses [my]_2959-i cheek . “ [I]_186-jameson do n’t like those red lips , though . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Oh . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i face falls . “ [I]_2959-i ca n’t kiss [you]_2959-i without wearing the evidence . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile as [he]_186-jameson holds [me]_2959-i . Something has changed between [us]_1429-us again today . Another day , another dynamic . [I]_2959-i feel so close to [him]_186-jameson . Something about all that honesty yesterday tore down [my]_2959-i defenses against [him]_186-jameson . [Molly]_198-molly is completely right , and [I]_2959-i am looking for the negative in this , but [I]_2959-i ca n’t help it ; [I]_2959-i fear [my]_2959-i heart may be in dire danger . If [he]_186-jameson leaves [me]_2959-i . . . how would [I]_2959-i cope ? [I]_2959-i ’ve been hurt before , and although [I]_2959-i know that [Jameson]_186-jameson is in a completely different league than [my]_2959-i past relationships , the prospect is terrifying . This one will hurt . . . deeply . [He]_186-jameson ’s wearing a black tuxedo and a bow tie ; [his]_186-jameson eyes are a brilliant blue , and [his]_186-jameson dark hair frames [his]_186-jameson beautiful face . [I]_2959-i ’ve never had a man terrify [me]_2959-i the way that [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson does . [He]_186-jameson ’s everything [I]_2959-i never knew [I]_2959-i needed . [He]_186-jameson takes [my]_2959-i hand in [his]_186-jameson . “ Do [you]_3032-you have everything ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Uh - huh . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i put [my]_2959-i hand over [my]_2959-i heart to try to will it to slow down . “ What ’s wrong ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson says softly . “ [I]_186-jameson ’m nervous . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson smiles sexily . “ [You]_3032-you ’ll be fine . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Do n’t let [me]_186-jameson drink too much , okay ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Okay . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson smirks as [we]_1430-we walk to the door . “ And if [you]_3032-you see [me]_186-jameson drinking too much , take [my]_186-jameson glass from [me]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson frowns . “ Honestly , [Jay]_108-jay , [I]_186-jameson go from a level four to a ten in two mouthfuls . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson smirks and then , thinking on that statement further , throws [his]_186-jameson head back and laughs out loud . “ Not a truer word has ever been spoken . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i drop [my]_2959-i mouth open in fake horror . “ [I]_2959-i ’m not talking about head , [Jameson]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_186-jameson am . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson kisses [my]_2959-i hand . “ And for the record , [you]_186-jameson went from a ten to a twenty . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smirk , and [he]_186-jameson bends and kisses [my]_2959-i neck and then [my]_2959-i shoulder and then [my]_2959-i breast through [my]_2959-i dress . “ The sooner [we]_3033-we go , the sooner [we]_3033-we can leave . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson runs [his]_186-jameson hand down [my]_2959-i behind and gives [me]_2959-i a sharp slap . Half an hour later , [the limo]_{678-the limo} pulls into [the parking bay]_{639-the parking bay} , and [I]_2959-i look around at [all the beautiful people in black tie]_{1433-all the beautiful people in black tie} . As [my]_2959-i nerves begin to kick [me]_2959-i hard , [Jameson]_186-jameson picks up [my]_2959-i hand and kisses the back of it , oblivious to [my]_2959-i inner turmoil . What will [I]_2959-i say to [[his]_186-jameson mother]_{2681-his father} ? [[His]_186-jameson father]_{2681-his father} ? Oh hell . . . why did [I]_2959-i come ? [Alan]_246-alan opens the door , and [Jameson]_186-jameson climbs out and then takes [my]_2959-i hand and helps [me]_2959-i . [His]_186-jameson hand tenderly goes to [my]_2959-i lower back . “ Thank [you]_246-alan , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson says to [Alan]_246-alan . “ Thank [you]_246-alan . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i smile . [Jameson]_186-jameson takes [my]_2959-i hand , and [we]_1435-we walk up toward the large front doors . [A few people]_{1436-a few people} do a double take as [they]_{1436-a few people} see [us]_1435-we , and [people]_248-people are staring . [I]_2959-i hold [my]_2959-i breath as [he]_186-jameson leads [me]_2959-i through [the crowd]_{265-the crowd} . “ Hello , [Jameson]_186-jameson , ”_{[186-jameson]} [someone]_2326-someone says . [He]_186-jameson nods politely but does n’t stop to chat . [We]_1435-we walk in through the double doors , and [he]_186-jameson leads [me]_2959-i straight to a table up at the front . It ’s round with a white linen tablecloth and silver cutlery all lined up , and beautiful white flowers and candles sit in the center . Crap , what ’s the eating order of the cutlery ? [I]_2959-i need to go to [the bathroom]_{300-the bathroom} and google this shit . [[Jameson]_186-jameson ’s father]_{1441-jameson ’s father} is sitting at the table along with [an older woman]_{1442-an older woman} . [She]_{1442-an older woman} has dark hair that sits in a perfect bob . [She]_{1442-an older woman} ’s very attractive and wearing a glamorous black evening dress with long sleeves . “ [Mom]_70-mom , [Dad]_196-dad , this is [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_{[1441-jameson ’s father]} [He]_{1441-jameson ’s father} presents [me]_2959-i proudly . “ These are [[my]_{1441-jameson ’s father} parents]_{1038-my parents} , [Elizabeth]_{197-elizabeth} and [George]_0-aaron . ”_{[1441-jameson ’s father]} “ Hello , [dear]_0-aaron . ”_{[1434-his mother]} [[His]_{1441-jameson ’s father} mother]_{1434-his mother} stands and kisses both [my]_2959-i cheeks and holds [me]_2959-i at arm ’s length as [she]_{1434-his mother} inspects [me]_2959-i . “ Well , are n’t [you]_0-aaron something special . ”_{[1434-his mother]} [She]_{1434-his mother} smiles warmly . Oh , [she]_{1434-his mother} ’s nice . [I]_2959-i smile awkwardly , and [[his]_{1441-jameson ’s father} father]_{2681-his father} pulls [me]_2959-i from [[his]_{1441-jameson ’s father} mother]_{1434-his mother} and kisses [my]_2959-i cheek . “ Hello , [Emily]_186-jameson . [I]_{2681-his father} did n’t get a chance to talk with [you]_186-jameson properly the other day . Lovely to meet [you]_186-jameson . ”_{[2681-his father]} “ Yes , [you]_186-jameson too , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [Jameson]_186-jameson pulls out [my]_2959-i chair , and [I]_2959-i sit down as [my]_2959-i heart races in [my]_2959-i chest . [I]_2959-i can feel [my]_2959-i face flushing , and [I]_2959-i silently die a little . Do n’t go red now , stupid . [I]_2959-i get an image of a beetroot face sitting next to [Mr. Gorgeous]_148-gorgeous [here]_{385-new york} . [Jameson]_186-jameson pours [me]_2959-i a glass of champagne and passes it over . “ Thank [you]_186-jameson , ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i whisper as [I]_2959-i take it from [him]_186-jameson . [My]_2959-i eyes hold [his]_186-jameson in a silent “ help [me]_186-jameson ”_{[186-jameson]} signal . [He]_186-jameson gives [me]_2959-i a sexy wink and slings [his]_186-jameson arm around the back of [my]_2959-i chair . “ Where ’s [Tris]_2430-tristan ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson asks casually as [he]_186-jameson looks around [the room]_{514-the room} . “ On [his]_186-jameson way , ”_{[186-jameson]} [[his]_186-jameson father]_{2681-his father} replies . [I]_2959-i look around at [all the people filling [the ballroom]_{514-the room}]_{1448-all the people filling the ballroom} . [The who ’s who are here]_{378-the men} — not that [I]_2959-i remember any of [their]_{378-the men} names . [I]_2959-i ’m only going on what [Molly]_198-molly and [Aaron]_0-aaron prepped [me]_2959-i with today . Two of [the managers [I]_2959-i ’ve seen [upstairs]_{2392-upstairs} on the top floor]_{1450-the managers i ’ve seen upstairs on the top floor} arrive with [their]_{378-the men} dates . “ Hello . ”_{[378-the men]} [They]_{378-the men} all shake hands , and then [the men]_{378-the men} frown when [they]_{378-the men} see [me]_2959-i . “ Have [you]_3035-you met [Emily]_186-jameson , [[my]_186-jameson girlfriend]_186-jameson ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson asks [them]_{378-the men} . “ Oh yes . ”_{[378-the men]} [They]_{378-the men} smile in an over - the - top way . “ Hello , [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_{[378-the men]} the four of [them]_{378-the men} splutter before shaking [my]_2959-i hand and sitting down at [our]_1452-our table . [Jameson]_186-jameson sits next to [me]_2959-i , and [[his]_186-jameson father]_{2681-his father} is on the other side of [him]_{2681-his father} , then [[his]_186-jameson mother]_{1434-his mother} , then [the other four]_{1455-the other four} . Two seats are to [my]_2959-i left — must be for [Tristan]_2430-tristan . “ Hello , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan says happily from behind [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i turn and see that [the blonde woman]_{1456-the blonde woman} is with [him]_{2681-his father} . “ Hello , ”_{[2304-everyone]} [everyone]_{2304-everyone} calls . “ [Emily]_186-jameson , this is [Melina]_57-claudia , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan introduces [me]_2959-i . “ Hello . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shake [her]_{1456-the blonde woman} hand . “ Hello . ”_{[1456-the blonde woman]} [She]_{1456-the blonde woman} smiles as [she]_{1456-the blonde woman} takes a seat beside [me]_2959-i and looks around the table . “ [I]_{1456-the blonde woman} just could n’t decide what to wear tonight . How is [everyone]_{2304-everyone} ? ”_{[1456-the blonde woman]} The table instantly falls into chatter . [She]_{1456-the blonde woman} ’s confident and beautiful , and [she]_{1456-the blonde woman} looks like a high - fashion model rather than a . . . what does [she]_{1456-the blonde woman} do again ? [I]_2959-i glance over to see [Jameson]_186-jameson and [[his]_186-jameson father]_{2681-his father} subtly roll [their]_1459-their eyes at each other . Hmm , what ’s that about ? [Tristan]_2430-tristan begins to talk to [a man at the table next to [us]_1461-us]_{1460-a man at the table next to us} and laughs out loud . [He]_2430-tristan really is very friendly . [Melina]_57-claudia takes out [her]_57-claudia phone and pulls a duck mouth and takes a selfie . [She]_57-claudia leans toward [me]_2959-i . “ Get in , ”_[57-claudia] [she]_57-claudia says . “ [I]_57-claudia ’ll tag [you]_57-claudia . ”_[57-claudia] [I]_2959-i pull out of [her]_57-claudia grip and lean away . “ No thank [you]_57-claudia . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t do social media . ”_[2959-i] “ What ? ”_[57-claudia] [she]_57-claudia gasps as [she]_57-claudia looks [me]_2959-i up and down in disgust . “ Why on [earth]_872-earth not ? What ’s wrong with [you]_57-claudia ? ”_[57-claudia] Okay . . . [this woman]_57-claudia ’s [a rude pig]_{1462-a rude pig} . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t like social media , that ’s all . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug . “ What ’s not to like ? ”_[57-claudia] [She]_57-claudia keeps taking [her]_57-claudia own photo . [I]_2959-i stare at [her]_57-claudia deadpan . “ A misrepresentation of society with unrealistic images that portray a fake lifestyle with impossible ideals , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reply as [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i wine . Do n’t piss [me]_2959-i off , [bitch]_1463-bitch . [Jameson]_186-jameson smirks as [he]_186-jameson stares straight ahead . [His]_186-jameson finger circles on [my]_2959-i bare shoulder . “ Oh God . ”_{[186-jameson]} [She]_57-claudia rolls [her]_57-claudia eyes and takes another selfie . [I]_2959-i glance over , and [[Jameson]_186-jameson ’s mother]_{1464-jameson ’s mother} smirks and winks at [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i can hear [my]_2959-i heartbeat in [my]_2959-i ears . [God]_0-aaron , cut out the snarky bitch act , [Emily]_186-jameson , [I]_2959-i remind [myself]_2959-i . Just be nice for once . [Jameson]_186-jameson and [[his]_186-jameson father]_{2681-his father} fall into conversation , and [I]_2959-i sit quietly . [The waiter]_{717-the waiter} comes over and goes to refill [my]_2959-i glass . “ No thank [you]_57-claudia . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [I]_2959-i smile . [Melina]_57-claudia talks to [the other people at the table]_{1467-the other people at the table} ; [she]_57-claudia ’s laughing loudly and loves attention . [She]_57-claudia ’s not at [all the type of woman [I]_2959-i thought [Tristan]_2430-tristan]_{1468-all the type of woman i thought tristan} would go for . “ [Emily]_186-jameson , [you]_57-claudia must come and visit [us]_3038-we in [the Hamptons]_{3039-the hamptons} , ”_{[186-jameson]} [[Jameson]_186-jameson ’s mother]_{1464-jameson ’s mother} says . “ Thank [you]_57-claudia . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . “ That would be lovely . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i should try to make conversation . “ Do [you]_57-claudia go on weekends ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ [We]_3038-we live there mostly now , ”_{[1464-jameson ’s mother]} [she]_{1464-jameson ’s mother} says . “ [We]_3038-we still have [[our]_3038-we apartments here]_{3040-our apartments here} , of course , but the change of pace is lovely . ”_{[1464-jameson ’s mother]} “ Oh . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . How many apartments do [they]_1470-they have here ? [Jeez]_93-jeez , [they]_1470-they really are from [a different world]_{2630-a different world} . “ Sounds great . ”_[93-jeez] “ [Jameson]_186-jameson said [you]_57-claudia are from [California]_{12-california} ? ”_{[1464-jameson ’s mother]} [she]_{1464-jameson ’s mother} asks . “ Yes . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i fake a smile . [He]_2959-i told [them]_1470-they about [me]_2959-i ? “ [I]_2959-i ’ve only been here a month . ”_[2959-i] “ And what do [you]_57-claudia think of [New York]_{385-new york} ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i love it . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . “ It ’s amazing . ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s hand sits on [my]_2959-i shoulder for moral support while [he]_186-jameson talks to [[his]_186-jameson father]_{2681-his father} . “ [Jameson]_186-jameson told [us]_1473-we that [you]_3041-you met each other more than twelve months ago , ”_{[197-elizabeth]} [Elizabeth]_{197-elizabeth} continues . “ Yes . ”_{[197-elizabeth]} [I]_2959-i fake a smile . Oh dear God . What did [he]_186-jameson tell [them]_1470-they about how [we]_1473-we met ? Please do n’t let it be the truth , that [we]_1473-we sat next to each other on a boozy flight and flirted like [sex - starved fools]_{1474-sex - starved fools} and then had wild layover sex for twelve hours while [I]_2959-i tried to suck every last drop of blood from [his]_186-jameson neck . [I]_2959-i pick up [my]_2959-i wine and tip [my]_2959-i head back and kick [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s foot . Help [me]_2959-i , [fucker]_2718-fucker . [He]_186-jameson smiles as if [he]_186-jameson already knows what ’s going on in [my]_2959-i head . [Tristan]_2430-tristan finally takes a seat , and [Melina]_57-claudia leans over and kisses [him]_2430-tristan . “ Let ’s go mingle . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan frowns as [he]_2430-tristan takes [his]_2430-tristan first sip of scotch . “ No , [babe]_2430-tristan . [I]_2430-tristan ’m staying [here]_{385-new york} . Knock [yourself]_57-claudia out . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Melina]_57-claudia waves at a woman on the other side of [the room]_{514-the room} and stands . “ Back in a moment . ”_[57-claudia] [She]_57-claudia smiles to the table as [she]_57-claudia practically runs to [the woman]_57-claudia and air kisses [her]_57-claudia two cheeks . “ Darling , ”_[57-claudia] [she]_57-claudia cries , and [they]_1477-they fake gush over each other . [My]_2959-i eyes find [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s , and [he]_186-jameson rolls [his]_186-jameson lips in amusement . It ’s as if [he]_186-jameson can read [my]_2959-i mind . [She]_57-claudia ’s a twit . [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s jaw tilts skyward , and [his]_186-jameson tongue runs across [his]_186-jameson teeth as if [he]_186-jameson ’s angered . [I]_2959-i follow [his]_186-jameson line of sight and see [a group of [men]_330-men and [women]_276-women arriving at a table across from [us]_1481-us]_{1478-a group of men and women arriving at a table across from us} . [My]_2959-i eyes flick to [[his]_186-jameson father]_{2681-his father} and [mother]_1483-mother as [they]_{1478-a group of men and women arriving at a table across from us} look on as well . “ Who are [they]_{1478-a group of men and women arriving at a table across from us} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ [The Ferrara family]_{3043-the ferrara family} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown in question . “ [They]_{1478-a group of men and women arriving at a table across from us} own [the Gazette and Ferrara Media]_{3044-the gazette and ferrara media} . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes widen . “ Oh . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i go back to watching [them]_{1478-a group of men and women arriving at a table across from us} as [they]_{1478-a group of men and women arriving at a table across from us} all sit around the table . [Three sons]_{1484-three sons} and [a mother]_{1485-a mother} and [father]_{2681-his father} , Italian by the looks of it . [Gorgeous - looking people]_{1486-gorgeous - looking people} . . . all dark hair and brown eyes . [Only one son]_{1487-only one son} has a date ; [the other two]_{1488-the other two} are alone . [The eldest son]_{1487-only one son} looks over and smiles when [he]_{1487-only one son} sees [us]_1489-us . [He]_{1487-only one son} waves and dips [his]_{1487-only one son} head . [Jameson]_186-jameson dips [his]_{1487-only one son} head back in a polite but cold gesture . “ Who ’s that ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i whisper . “ [Gabriel Ferrara]_2430-tristan , ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson replies as [he]_186-jameson sips [his]_186-jameson drink . Contempt drips from [his]_186-jameson every pore . “ [The CEO]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [My]_2959-i eyes widen . [I]_2959-i can tell that there is no love lost between [the two families]_{1490-the two families} . [CEO]_186-jameson versus [CEO]_186-jameson . “ [Emily]_186-jameson ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [a woman]_{339-a woman} ’s voice gasps from behind [us]_1489-us . [We]_1489-us all turn to see [a woman]_{339-a woman} . [I]_2959-i know [her]_{339-a woman} . “ [Athena]_200-athena . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i laugh as [I]_2959-i stand . [Athena]_200-athena is in [her]_200-athena sixties and [a woman of [the world]_{249-the world}]_{339-a woman} . [I]_2959-i adore [her]_{339-a woman} . “ Oh [[my]_{339-a woman} God]_{2363-my god} , ”_{[339-a woman]} [she]_{339-a woman} gasps as [she]_{339-a woman} pulls [me]_2959-i into an embrace . “ [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson , how on [earth]_872-earth do [you]_{2363-my god} know [Emily Foster]_186-jameson ? ”_[1493-he] [He]_1493-he chuckles . “ [Emily]_186-jameson has been [[my]_200-athena intern]_{3047-my intern} every college holiday for three years . ”_[200-athena] [Athena]_200-athena laughs . [George]_0-aaron looks on as if impressed . “ [She]_{339-a woman} would n’t move [here]_{385-new york} for [my]_{339-a woman} company . ”_{[339-a woman]} [She]_{339-a woman} smiles as [she]_{339-a woman} rubs [my]_2959-i arm . “ What do [you]_{2363-my god} mean ? ”_[0-aaron] [George]_0-aaron asks . “ [Best damn reporter [I]_200-athena ever had]_{2363-my god} , ”_[200-athena] [Athena]_200-athena replies . “ [I]_2959-i ’ve offered [her]_200-athena a job every year , but [she]_200-athena always turned [me]_2959-i down , stating that [Miles Media]_{68-miles media} would be the only reason [she]_200-athena would move to [New York]_{385-new york} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile awkwardly . Please shut up . [I]_2959-i ’m trying to play it cool here . “ Is that so ? ”_[2959-i] [George]_0-aaron smiles over at [me]_2959-i . “ Well , [she]_200-athena ’s found [her]_200-athena place at [Miles Media]_{14-miles media} . ”_[0-aaron] [Athena]_200-athena looks down at [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s hand as it rests on [my]_2959-i lap . “ [I]_200-athena can see that . ”_[200-athena] [She]_200-athena smiles down at [me]_2959-i . “ [Emily]_186-jameson , come , [I]_200-athena have [someone]_2326-someone [I]_200-athena want [you]_2326-someone to meet . ”_[200-athena] [She]_200-athena glances at [Jameson]_186-jameson . “ Can [I]_200-athena steal [her]_200-athena for a moment , please ? ”_[200-athena] “ Of course . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson kisses [my]_2959-i hand before [he]_186-jameson lets [me]_2959-i go . [His]_186-jameson eyes linger on [my]_2959-i face , and [I]_2959-i smile softly . [This man]_186-jameson is just so . . . [Athena]_200-athena pulls [me]_2959-i over to the other side of [the room]_{514-the room} . “ Oh [my]_200-athena God , ”_[200-athena] [she]_200-athena splutters as [we]_1495-we weave between the tables . “ [You]_3050-you ’re dating [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson . ”_[200-athena] “ Yes . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i laugh . “ [He]_186-jameson ’s [the most delicious man on [the planet]_{994-the planet}]_186-jameson . ”_[200-athena] [She]_200-athena turns back and smiles at [me]_2959-i . “ And the crankiest . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i giggle as [she]_200-athena drags [me]_2959-i to [the bar]_{459-the bar} to [a group of women]_{1497-a group of women} and [men who are all standing around]_{1498-men who are all standing around} . “ [Lauren]_201-lauren , look who ’s [here]_{385-new york} ! [Emily Foster]_186-jameson . ”_[200-athena] “ Oh [[my]_201-lauren God]_186-jameson . ”_[201-lauren] [Lauren]_201-lauren laughs as [she]_200-athena hugs [me]_2959-i . [Lauren]_201-lauren and [I]_2959-i were interns together in [our]_1499-we second year . [Lauren]_201-lauren went on to work with [them]_{1497-a group of women} . “ What are [you]_186-jameson doing here ? ”_[201-lauren] [She]_201-lauren smiles excitedly . “ [I]_201-lauren ’ve moved to [New York]_{385-new york} now . [I]_201-lauren work for [Miles Media]_{14-miles media} . ”_[201-lauren] “ Really ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i laugh . “ Yes . ”_[2959-i] “ Oh [[my]_201-lauren God]_{2363-my god} , [we]_1499-we have to catch up . ”_[201-lauren] “ Yes . ”_[2959-i] It would be so nice to have [a friend here that [I]_2959-i do n’t work with]_{1500-a friend here that i do n’t work with} . “ Make sure [we]_1499-we get [each other]_{2339-each other} ’s numbers . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i glance around , and [everyone]_{2304-everyone} has a drink . “ [I]_202-someone ’m just going to get another champagne . ”_{[202-someone]} [Someone]_202-someone grabs [my]_2959-i elbow from behind , and [I]_2959-i turn . [I]_2959-i ’m taken aback . It ’s [the tall Italian man]_{1502-the tall italian man} , [the CEO of the Gazette]_{1502-the tall italian man} . “ Hello . ”_{[1502-the tall italian man]} [He]_{1502-the tall italian man} smiles sexily down at [me]_2959-i . “ Hi . ”_{[1502-the tall italian man]} “ Who are [you]_{1502-the tall italian man} ? ”_{[1502-the tall italian man]} [he]_{1502-the tall italian man} asks . [I]_2959-i frown , and [my]_2959-i eyes flick back to [my]_2959-i table . [Jameson]_186-jameson is talking to [Tristan]_2430-tristan . “ [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i reply nervously . [He]_{1502-the tall italian man} picks up [my]_2959-i hand and kisses the back of it . “ [My]_{1502-the tall italian man} name is [Gabriel Ferrara]_2430-tristan . ”_{[1502-the tall italian man]} “ Oh . ”_{[1502-the tall italian man]} “ And [I]_2959-i like to take over all things owned by [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes widen . [His]_{1502-the tall italian man} dark eyes drop to [my]_2959-i lips . “ [Women]_276-women included . ”_{[1502-the tall italian man]} Chapter 18 “ Excuse [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown as [I]_2959-i snatch [my]_2959-i hand from [his]_{1502-the tall italian man} grip . “ What did [you]_2959-i say ? ”_{[1502-the tall italian man]} [He]_{1502-the tall italian man} smiles sexily . “ [I]_{1502-the tall italian man} was merely stating that [you]_2959-i are gorgeous . Do n’t be alarmed . ”_{[1502-the tall italian man]} “ Well , do n’t , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . [He]_{1502-the tall italian man} smiles as [he]_{1502-the tall italian man} sips [his]_{1502-the tall italian man} drink , clearly amused by [my]_2959-i response . “ Who are [you]_2959-i ? ”_{[1502-the tall italian man]} “ Someone whose intelligence is insulted by [your]_2959-i audacity . Goodbye , [Mr. Ferrara]_2430-tristan . Go away . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i turn [my]_2959-i back to [him]_{1502-the tall italian man} and take [my]_2959-i place at [the bar]_{459-the bar} . [His]_{1502-the tall italian man} lips come to [my]_2959-i ear from behind . “ Lovely to meet [you]_2959-i , [Emily]_186-jameson . [We]_3056-we will meet again . [I]_{1502-the tall italian man} ’ll make sure of it . ”_{[1502-the tall italian man]} [His]_{1502-the tall italian man} breath prickles [my]_2959-i neck , and traitorous goose bumps scatter up [my]_2959-i arms . “ Do n’t bother , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sneer , annoyed by [my]_2959-i physical reaction to [him]_{1502-the tall italian man} . [My]_2959-i heart is hammering . No wonder [poor Jameson]_186-jameson is stressed to [the max]_{1504-the max} . [He]_186-jameson ’s dealing with complete and utter snakes here . Good grief , [I]_2959-i ’m completely rattled . [I]_2959-i get [my]_2959-i drink and go back to talking to [Lauren]_201-lauren , although [my]_2959-i mind is anywhere but on [our]_1505-our conversation . [That fucking asshole [Gabriel]_2430-tristan]_{1506-that fucking asshole gabriel} is sabotaging [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s company and is openly making a play for [[his]_{1506-that fucking asshole gabriel} women]_{1507-his women} . [Woman]_76-woman . [I]_2959-i feel outraged on [his]_{1506-that fucking asshole gabriel} behalf , and [I]_2959-i want to march over and tell [Jameson]_186-jameson what just happened , but then [I]_2959-i do n’t want to stress [him]_186-jameson out . But maybe that ’s exactly what [Gabriel]_2430-tristan wants — an open war . Shit . . . this is hectic . From [[my]_2959-i place]_{2742-my place} by [the bar]_{459-the bar} , [I]_2959-i watch as person after [person]_656-person goes and strategically says hello to [the Miles family at [their]_{1512-the miles family at their table} table]_{1512-the miles family at their table} , as if wanting to be acknowledged by [them]_{1512-the miles family at their table} . [Tristan]_2430-tristan is all smiles and happy , and [Jameson]_186-jameson and [[his]_186-jameson father]_{2681-his father} are polite . It ’s blatantly obvious to [me]_2959-i that [they]_{1512-the miles family at their table} are not at all seduced or fooled by the fake greetings and well wishes . After the longest conversation in history , [I]_2959-i make [my]_2959-i way back to [Jameson]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i sit beside [him]_186-jameson , and [he]_186-jameson takes [my]_2959-i hand in [his]_186-jameson and puts it on [his]_186-jameson thigh . “ Do [you]_186-jameson like [these people]_{3057-these people} here ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i whisper . [His]_186-jameson eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ [I]_186-jameson like [the people at this table]_{3058-the people at this table} . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i look around nervously . “ What ’s wrong ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson asks , sensing that something is off . “ Nothing , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper as [I]_2959-i lean in and kiss [him]_186-jameson softly on the lips . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t particularly like [any of [these people]_{3057-these people}]_{3059-any of these people} . ”_[2959-i] “ [Me]_186-jameson neither , and as long as [you]_186-jameson like [me]_186-jameson , that ’s all that matters , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson murmurs . [I]_2959-i smile over at [[my]_2959-i beautiful man]_186-jameson and lean up to whisper in [his]_186-jameson ear , “ [I]_186-jameson more than like [you]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson squeezes [my]_2959-i hand in [his]_186-jameson . “ Two hours , and [we]_1514-we can go , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson whispers . “ Good . ”_{[186-jameson]} Dinner has been served , [we]_1514-we are on to dessert , and the award ceremony is about to take place . The lights are dimmed , and [the stage]_{1515-the stage} is lit up by a spotlight as [they]_1514-we go through the categories . [They]_1514-we must start with the smaller awards first . [Jameson]_186-jameson sits and stares at the stage as [he]_186-jameson holds [my]_2959-i hand on [his]_186-jameson large muscular thigh . [He]_186-jameson ’s completely expressionless , and [I]_2959-i have no idea what [he]_186-jameson ’s thinking . [He]_186-jameson does it so well , keeps [his]_186-jameson emotions completely under control . [Tristan]_2430-tristan is laughing and talking about the categories with [the other managers]_{1516-the other managers} sitting at the table . [He]_2430-tristan ’s completely relaxed and having a good night . How are [two brothers so different]_{1517-two brothers so different} ? [Tristan]_2430-tristan is open and jovial , and [Jameson]_186-jameson is closed and hard . . . at least to [the outside world]_{1518-the outside world} . Although , knowing what [Tristan]_2430-tristan ’s role is in the company — acquisitions — [he]_2430-tristan has to be hard on some level . Perhaps even harder than [the rest of [them]_1514-we]_{1519-the rest of them} because [he]_2430-tristan takes over [companies]_{1520-companies} and dissolves [them]_1514-we . [I]_2959-i think on it for a moment as [I]_2959-i stare at [Jameson]_186-jameson . No , that ’s impossible — [nobody]_2321-nobody could be harder than [Jameson]_186-jameson . [My]_2959-i eyes flick to [[his]_186-jameson father]_{2681-his father} , who wears the same steely face as [he]_186-jameson watches the stage . . . perhaps [George]_0-aaron is . [I]_2959-i think back to [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s childhood and how [he]_186-jameson went to boarding school overseas with [[his]_186-jameson brothers]_{2390-his brothers} . How do [you]_1524-you learn to be soft and nurturing when [you]_1524-you ’re in a cold school environment ? [I]_2959-i wonder if that is why [he]_186-jameson ’s all or nothing with [me]_2959-i . Does [he]_186-jameson have to give [himself]_186-jameson permission to feel before [he]_186-jameson can physically do it ? It would make sense . [I]_2959-i mean , since [he]_186-jameson told [me]_2959-i [he]_186-jameson wants [me]_2959-i , [we]_1525-we ’ve moved forward in leaps and bounds . Every touch [I]_2959-i feel [him]_186-jameson let [me]_2959-i in a little more . Is it because [he]_186-jameson can finally verbalize things now ? [I]_2959-i exhale heavily as [I]_2959-i clap for an award . [My]_2959-i mind is far from here . [I]_2959-i ’m fixed on [the complex man [I]_2959-i ’ve fallen for]_{1526-the complex man i ’ve fallen for} , as [I]_2959-i try to unravel [his]_186-jameson inner demons . Maybe [Jay]_108-jay needs to talk about [the company]_{2358-the company} . Maybe [he]_108-jay needs [someone]_2326-someone [he]_108-jay does n’t have to pretend with that [he]_108-jay has everything under control . [He]_108-jay ’s [the CEO of [Miles Media]_{68-miles media}]_108-jay . [The family]_{68-miles media} is looking to [him]_108-jay for guidance . Waiting for [him]_108-jay to rectify the situation . Of course [he]_108-jay ’s stressed . [The reporter in [me]_2959-i]_{1529-the reporter in me} wants to deal with this situation , find the leak , and fight [our]_1530-our way back to the top . [The lover in [me]_2959-i]_{1529-the reporter in me} wants to steal [my]_2959-i Jay away and take [him]_108-jay to [an island in [the Bahamas]_{1532-the bahamas}]_{1531-an island in the bahamas} and let [him]_108-jay live a peaceful , relaxed lifestyle . . . where the only thing [he]_108-jay has to worry about is pushing [[his]_108-jay children]_{1533-his children} on a swing . [[His]_108-jay children]_{1533-his children} . [I]_2959-i feel [my]_2959-i chest constrict as [I]_2959-i get a peep into the future with [Jameson]_186-jameson . Will [[his]_108-jay children]_{1533-his children} bear this stress ? Will [they]_{1533-his children} be able to feel [[their]_{1533-his children} father]_{2422-their father} ’s worry through [his]_{2422-their father} touch ? [They]_{1533-his children} ’d have to — [I]_2959-i know [I]_2959-i do . [God]_0-aaron , [I]_2959-i need to wind [him]_{2422-their father} down so that [he]_{2422-their father} can deal with all of this crap . How do [I]_2959-i do that ? [I]_2959-i think for a moment and clap on cue as another award is announced . [He]_{2422-their father} needs to get out of [New York]_{385-new york} . Yes , that ’s it . A weekend away . Somewhere crazy different . [I]_2959-i smile as the idea takes shape in [my]_2959-i mind . “ And now for the major award for the night , ”_[2959-i] [the MC]_2959-i announces . “ The Diamond Award for exceptional media coverage goes to . . . ”_[2959-i] The drum rolls . [He]_2959-i opens the envelope and smiles with a shake of [his]_2959-i head . “ Well , well . . . it seems [we]_1536-we have a changing of [the guard]_{477-the guard} . ”_[2959-i] [The crowd]_{265-the crowd} falls silent . “ Ferrara Media . ”_{[265-the crowd]} [The crowd]_{265-the crowd} applauds , and the Ferrara table erupts into cheers . [Jameson]_186-jameson clenches [his]_186-jameson jaw and sips [his]_186-jameson drink . “ Fuck , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan mutters under [his]_186-jameson breath . [Our]_1536-we table stays silent as [we]_1536-we watch [Gabriel Ferrara]_2430-tristan take the stage to accept the award . [He]_2430-tristan holds it up in the air , and [the people in [the crowd]_{265-the crowd}]_{1537-the people in the crowd} all laugh and cheer , and [he]_2430-tristan takes the microphone . “ Thank [you]_186-jameson . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan looks around [the room]_{514-the room} . “ It means a lot . Commiserations to [Miles Media]_{68-miles media} , who have won this award consecutively for the last sixteen years . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan blows a cheeky kiss to [Jameson]_186-jameson and then waves down to [our]_1536-we table . [Jameson]_186-jameson glares at [him]_186-jameson . [His]_186-jameson tongue runs across [his]_186-jameson teeth as sheer contempt drips from [his]_186-jameson every pore . “ [I]_186-jameson think it is safe to say”—Gabriel_{[186-jameson]} smiles sarcastically—“that in the last twelve months [we]_1536-we have led the market with [our]_1536-we cutting - edge news delivery . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson holds up [his]_186-jameson finger . “ [We]_1536-we are now [the number one media empire in [the world]_{249-the world}]_{3061-the number one media empire in the world} . ”_{[186-jameson]} [The crowd]_{265-the crowd} claps and cheers . [He]_186-jameson holds the trophy in the air . The Ferrara table goes wild . “ [You]_1541-you ’ve got to be joking , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i scoff , unable to help it . [The Miles family]_{1143-the miles family} glares at [Gabriel]_2430-tristan as [he]_2430-tristan stands on stage . . . and [I]_2959-i can feel [their]_{1143-the miles family} anger because [I]_2959-i have it too . [I]_2959-i can feel it growing inside [me]_2959-i like a pulsing disease . It ’s one thing to lose [your]_1541-you crown , but to have it taken by [a thief who ’s stealing [your]_1541-you work]_{1542-a thief who ’s stealing your work} is a completely different ball game . [Gabriel]_2430-tristan bows and then takes a seat back at [his]_2430-tristan table . [He]_2430-tristan kisses the trophy as [the photographers]_{1543-the photographers} snap away . This win will be headlining tomorrow ’s news stories across [the country]_{2320-the country} . Fury and silence sweep around [our]_1545-our table . [Nobody]_2321-nobody says a word . [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_2430-tristan across [the room]_{514-the room} and want to wipe that sleazy smile off [his]_2430-tristan gorgeous face . And [I]_2959-i will . Prepare [yourself]_1541-you , [Mr. Gabriel Ferrara]_2430-tristan . [I]_2959-i ’m taking [you]_1541-you down . [I]_2959-i gasp for breath as [I]_2959-i watch [Jameson]_186-jameson lap [me]_2959-i in [Central Park]_{17-central park} . It ’s six o’clock , and the sun is just rising . [He]_186-jameson ’s running particularly fast today . . . and [I]_2959-i ’m letting [him]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i get it now ; [his]_186-jameson responsibility is not something [he]_186-jameson can just switch off at the end of the day . [I]_2959-i feel it for [him]_186-jameson too now . Last night , however infuriating it was , taught [me]_2959-i a valuable lesson on [[his]_186-jameson competitors]_{1548-his competitors} . [They]_{1548-his competitors} have no morals and no fear , and that makes [them]_{1548-his competitors} very [dangerous players]_{1549-dangerous players} indeed . [Jameson]_186-jameson turns and sprints back to [me]_2959-i . [He]_186-jameson ’s always careful [he]_186-jameson keeps [me]_2959-i in [his]_186-jameson sight . [He]_186-jameson was quiet when [we]_1550-we came [home]_2289-home last night , deep in thought . [We]_1550-we had a shower and made love , and then [he]_186-jameson finally relaxed a little . [I]_2959-i made [us]_1550-we a snack , and [we]_1550-we lay on the couch in each other ’s arms and watched a movie for a while . [We]_1550-we went to bed late , but [we]_1550-we needed the time together to wind down . [Neither of [us]_1550-we]_{757-neither of us} brought up the award ceremony . [We]_1550-we did n’t speak of it at all — there ’s nothing to say . It is what it is . No amount of conversation can take away the fact that [Ferrara Media]_{203-ferrara media} has been rewarded for being deceitful . It ’s eating [me]_2959-i alive ; [I]_2959-i can only imagine what it ’s doing to [Jameson]_186-jameson . [He]_186-jameson comes to a stop in front of [me]_2959-i , panting heavily . “ [You]_3063-you ’re especially slow this morning , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson teases . “ [You]_3063-you ’re especially fast today . That ax must be big . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson chuckles as [he]_186-jameson leans in to kiss [me]_2959-i . “ Fucking huge . ”_{[186-jameson]} [We]_1550-we turn and begin the slow jog back [home]_2289-home . “ [I]_186-jameson ’ll organize [Alan]_246-alan for the weekend to get [your]_3063-you things ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson says as [he]_186-jameson runs . “ About that . . . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Yes ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson pants , still exhausted from [his]_186-jameson sprinting . “ [I]_186-jameson have a proposal for [you]_3063-you . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson stops running . “ Such as ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i turn and take [his]_186-jameson hands in [mine]_2959-i . “ [I]_2959-i ’ll move in with [you]_3063-you on one condition . ”_[2959-i] “ What ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson stares at [me]_2959-i as if already annoyed by [my]_2959-i bartering . “ [I]_186-jameson ’ll move in with [you]_3063-you if [we]_3064-we can get out of [New York]_{385-new york} on the weekends . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ What ? ”_[2959-i] “ Well , not every weekend . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug . “ But enough that [we]_3064-we can relax . ”_[2959-i] “ [New York]_{385-new york} is [[my]_2959-i home]_{385-new york} . [I]_2959-i am relaxed . What are [you]_3063-you talking about , [woman]_76-woman ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile and start jogging again . [He]_186-jameson catches up with [me]_2959-i . “ What ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ It ’s impossible to relax here , [Jay]_108-jay . [This city]_{385-new york} is hectic . The energy of [this place]_{385-new york} could be seen from space . Sirens sound all night , [cars]_3066-cars and traffic and millions of [people]_248-people all buzzing at a million miles an hour . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson watches [me]_2959-i as [he]_186-jameson listens . “ [We]_3064-we do n’t have to go far out of [the city]_{385-new york} . [I]_186-jameson ’ve already booked a surprise trip away for [us]_3064-we this weekend . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Since when ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Since yesterday . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ’m totally lying through [my]_2959-i teeth here , but whatever . “ Think about it . [We]_3064-we live in [[your]_3068-your apartment]_{2745-your apartment} through the week and work hard . Then on the weekends , [we]_3064-we completely switch off . No phones , no internet . Just [us]_3064-we . ”_[2959-i] “ What ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson frowns . “ That ’s impossible . [I]_186-jameson need to be online at all times , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ No , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pant as [we]_1554-we run . “ What [you]_186-jameson need is to recharge so that [you]_186-jameson can be [the best CEO]_{3070-the best ceo} [you]_186-jameson can be . A tired , stressed - out version of [you]_186-jameson wo n’t be half as switched on . ”_[2959-i] [We]_1554-we run until [we]_1554-we hit [the street]_{550-the street} , and then [we]_1554-we look both ways as [we]_1554-we wait to cross . “ And besides , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pant , “ this way [I]_2959-i get the best of both worlds . ”_[2959-i] “ What do [you]_186-jameson mean ? ”_[2959-i] “ Well , [I]_2959-i ’m utterly in love with [[my]_2959-i Jim]_{3071-my jim} , [the man [I]_2959-i met on [the plane]_{268-the plane}]_{3071-my jim} . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i listens . “ And [I]_186-jameson ’m learning to love [the stressed - out CEO who takes over [his]_2959-i body]_{3073-the stressed - out ceo who takes over his body} sometimes . ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson smiles as [he]_186-jameson runs , finally putting the pieces together . “ This way . . . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pant . God , why do [I]_2959-i insist on talking as [I]_2959-i run ? “ This way [I]_186-jameson get to spend time with both of [[my]_186-jameson men]_{3074-my men} . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson grabs [my]_2959-i hand and pulls [me]_2959-i back to [him]_186-jameson ; [his]_186-jameson lips take [mine]_2959-i as [he]_186-jameson clutches [my]_2959-i face in [his]_186-jameson hands . [His]_186-jameson tongue swipes through [my]_2959-i lips , and [his]_186-jameson kiss is electric with just the right amount of suction . [We]_1556-we kiss again and again , and [my]_2959-i hands go to [his]_186-jameson hips . What must [we]_1556-we look like , making out on [the street corner]_{1557-the street corner} ? [My]_2959-i eyes search [his]_186-jameson . “ Do [we]_1556-we have a deal ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ Am [I]_186-jameson moving in ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson trails [his]_186-jameson fingers down [my]_2959-i face . “ [I]_186-jameson guess [we]_1556-we can come to some kind of weekend arrangement . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i smile . “ Only because both of [[your]_3075-you men]_{3076-your men} love to fuck [you]_3075-you . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson grabs [my]_2959-i hips and bounces them off [his]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i giggle against [his]_186-jameson lips as [he]_186-jameson holds [my]_2959-i head to [his]_186-jameson . “ [You]_3075-you ’re a sex maniac , [Miles]_186-jameson , ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i whisper . [He]_186-jameson grabs [my]_2959-i behind once more , and a car horn sounds . “ Get [a room]_{692-a room} , ”_{[2300-a man]} [a man]_{2300-a man} calls . [We]_1559-we both laugh and begin to run across [the street]_{550-the street} . [I]_2959-i smile over at [him]_{2300-a man} as [we]_1559-we run . “ What ? ”_{[2300-a man]} [He]_{2300-a man} smirks . “ Nothing . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i slap [his]_{2300-a man} behind . “ Race [you]_3075-you [home]_2289-home . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i take off . “ [I]_{2300-a man} could beat [you]_3075-you with [my]_{2300-a man} legs tied . ”_{[2300-a man]} [He]_{2300-a man} laughs from behind . “ In fact , if [I]_{2300-a man} beat [you]_3075-you , [I]_{2300-a man} am tying [you]_3075-you up . ”_{[2300-a man]} “ Not if [I]_2959-i tie [you]_3075-you up first , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i call as [I]_2959-i sprint . [I]_2959-i giggle as [I]_2959-i hear [his]_{2300-a man} footsteps behind [me]_2959-i . Now there ’s an incentive to run fast . Knock , knock . [I]_2959-i tap on [Tristan]_2430-tristan ’s door . “ Come in , ”_{[2300-a man]} [his]_{2300-a man} deep voice calls . [I]_2959-i peek around the door . [Tristan]_2430-tristan is sitting at [his]_2430-tristan desk . “ Come in , [Em]_186-jameson . ”_{[2300-a man]} [He]_{2300-a man} smiles . [Em]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i smile and take a seat at [his]_2430-tristan desk . [I]_2959-i ’ve decided that [I]_2959-i ’m keeping [Tristan]_2430-tristan completely up to date . . . with everything . [He]_2430-tristan loves [Jameson]_186-jameson , and [he]_2430-tristan will decipher what [Jay]_108-jay needs to know and what [he]_2430-tristan does n’t . [His]_108-jay eyes hold [mine]_2959-i with a tender glow . “ [You]_108-jay were a hit with [[our]_108-jay parents]_{3079-our parents} last night . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . “ Really ? ”_[2959-i] “ [[My]_108-jay mother]_{356-my mother} was gushing about [you]_108-jay this morning . ”_[108-jay] [He]_108-jay smiles as [he]_108-jay holds [his]_108-jay pen in [his]_108-jay hand and swivels on [his]_108-jay chair . “ [I]_108-jay just wanted to keep [you]_108-jay updated on a few things . ”_[108-jay] [He]_108-jay frowns . “ Okay . ”_[108-jay] “ [I]_2959-i ’m going to keep [my]_2959-i relationship with [Jameson]_186-jameson completely unrelated to work . [I]_2959-i feel [he]_108-jay needs a break from it . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_108-jay agree . [He]_108-jay does . ”_[108-jay] “ So , therefore , there are a few things that [I]_108-jay wanted to discuss with [you]_108-jay . ”_[108-jay] “ [Great]_204-great . Fire away . ”_[2959-i] “ Well , [you]_108-jay know how [we]_3081-we ’ve been suspicious of [Hayden]_266-jim ? ”_[108-jay] “ Yes . ”_[108-jay] [He]_108-jay frowns . “ [I]_108-jay found out from [Molly]_198-molly — and this is just rumors — that [Hayden]_266-jim was fired from [the Gazette]_{596-the gazette} for a phone - tapping scandal . ”_[108-jay] [He]_108-jay sits forward in [his]_108-jay seat . “ Like what ? ”_[108-jay] “ Apparently — and honestly , [I]_108-jay have no idea if this is true , but [Molly]_198-molly said it was what circulated at the time — [he]_108-jay was tapping [Keely May]_198-molly ’s phone and stealing [her]_198-molly stories . ”_[108-jay] “ What ? ”_[108-jay] [he]_108-jay snaps . “ Are [you]_108-jay fucking kidding [me]_108-jay ? ”_[108-jay] “ No . ”_[108-jay] [He]_108-jay smiles broadly . “ This is excellent . This gives [me]_108-jay enough ammunition . ”_[108-jay] “ To do what ? ”_[2959-i] “ To get a search on [his]_108-jay computers . [We]_3083-we have n’t tapped [him]_108-jay yet . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile proudly . “ Hopefully this will help [us]_3083-we . ”_[2959-i] “ Good work , [Em]_3084-em . ”_[108-jay] [He]_108-jay swivels on [his]_108-jay chair and makes a note . [I]_2959-i watch [him]_108-jay for a moment . “ There was also something else . ”_[108-jay] [His]_108-jay eyes rise . “ [I]_108-jay have n’t said anything to [Jameson]_186-jameson , but [Gabriel Ferrara]_2430-tristan made a pass at [me]_108-jay last night . ”_[108-jay] [His]_108-jay face falls . “ [He]_108-jay did what ? ”_[108-jay] [he]_108-jay snaps . “ Do n’t get excited , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer . “ What did [he]_108-jay say ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown as [I]_2959-i think back . “ [I]_2430-tristan was at [the bar]_{459-the bar} , and [he]_108-jay asked [me]_2430-tristan who [I]_2430-tristan was . [I]_2430-tristan thought [he]_108-jay was just being nice , and [I]_2430-tristan replied [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan frowns as [he]_108-jay listens . “ Then [he]_108-jay picked up [my]_108-jay hand and kissed the back of it and said , ‘ [My]_108-jay name is [Gabriel Ferrara]_2430-tristan , and [I]_108-jay like to take over all things owned by [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson . ’ ”_[108-jay] [Tristan]_2430-tristan ’s eyes widen . “ Then [he]_108-jay said , ‘ [Women]_276-women included . ’ ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ What the fuck ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan snaps . “ Are [you]_2430-tristan fucking serious ? ”_[108-jay] [He]_108-jay stands in a rush . “ But [I]_2959-i do n’t know if [I]_2959-i read it the wrong way or . . . , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer . “ [I]_2430-tristan do n’t want to be making more of this than it is , but [I]_2430-tristan felt that it was really quite off . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan ’s eyes blaze with anger . “ What did [you]_2430-tristan say ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ [I]_2959-i told [him]_108-jay [he]_108-jay was insulting [my]_2959-i intelligence and to go away . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i curl [my]_2959-i lip in disgust . “ [He]_108-jay makes [my]_2959-i skin crawl . ”_[2959-i] “ Fucking hell . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan sighs as [he]_108-jay turns and puts [his]_108-jay hands into [his]_108-jay suit pockets and stares out the window , deep in thought . “ [I]_2430-tristan did n’t say anything to [Jameson]_186-jameson because [I]_2430-tristan feel like that ’s exactly what [Gabriel]_2430-tristan wanted [me]_2430-tristan to do . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan ’s jaw ticks in anger . “ [He]_2430-tristan wants to start a war . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ That ’s what it felt like . . . there could be no other explanation , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ [He]_2430-tristan ’s trying to rattle [him]_2430-tristan by attacking [him]_2430-tristan on a personal basis . ”_[2959-i] “ Yes . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sigh as [my]_2959-i heart bleeds for [[my]_2959-i Jay]_{1145-my jay} . “ [I]_2430-tristan worried about whether [I]_2430-tristan should say anything to [you]_{1145-my jay} all night . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan ’s eyes come to [me]_2959-i . “ Do n’t tell [Jameson]_186-jameson . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ Okay . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ Let ’s keep this between [us]_3087-us . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i exhale heavily . “ [I]_2959-i ’m concerned about [Jameson]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] [he]_2959-i says . “ [He]_2959-i ’s about to fucking crack . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2430-tristan know ; [I]_2430-tristan ’m going to try to get [him]_2959-i out of [the city]_{2-the city} for the weekends and get [him]_2959-i offline . [I]_2430-tristan ’m doing all [I]_2430-tristan can to keep [him]_2959-i calm . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ Good idea . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i nods , still deep in thought . “ If [you]_3089-you had told [him]_2959-i about [Gabriel]_2430-tristan , [he]_2959-i would be over there strangling [the fucker]_{3090-the fucker} right now . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pinch the bridge of [my]_2959-i nose . “ [I]_2959-i know . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_3089-you did the right thing . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i smiles . “ Thank [you]_3089-you for telling [me]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes hold [his]_2959-i . “ [I]_2959-i hate not telling [Jameson]_186-jameson , but [I]_2959-i feel like [I]_2959-i need to protect [him]_186-jameson from this . [Gabriel]_2430-tristan is just trying to rattle [him]_2430-tristan . ”_[2959-i] “ [My]_2959-i thoughts exactly , ”_[2959-i] [he]_2959-i agrees . “ Thanks , [I]_2959-i ’ll get on this now . Can [you]_3089-you do [me]_2959-i a favor and try to find out as much about [Hayden]_266-jim ’s personal life as [you]_3089-you can ? Where [he]_2959-i hangs out , [partner]_3091-partner , that kind of thing . ”_[2959-i] “ Okay , [I]_2959-i ’m on it . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stand and leave [[his]_2959-i office]_{2600-jameson ’s office} and walk over to [[Jameson]_186-jameson ’s office]_{2600-jameson ’s office} , and [I]_2959-i knock on the door . “ Come in , ”_[2959-i] [his]_2959-i deep , velvety voice calls . [I]_2959-i open the door to see [my]_2959-i beautiful man sitting behind [his]_2959-i desk . [He]_2959-i smiles warmly when [he]_2959-i sees [me]_2959-i and pats [his]_2959-i lap . [I]_2959-i lock the door and sit on [his]_2959-i lap and take [his]_2959-i lips with [mine]_2959-i . “ Hello , [boss]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i runs [his]_2959-i hand up [my]_2959-i thigh . [His]_2959-i mouth goes to [my]_2959-i neck , and [I]_2959-i smile , and then [I]_2959-i see it . A half - empty glass of scotch sitting on [his]_2959-i desk . [I]_2959-i glance at [my]_2959-i watch . “ It ’s eleven o’clock , [Jameson]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i rolls [his]_2959-i eyes and pushes [me]_2959-i off [his]_2959-i lap . “ [I]_2959-i needed something to take the edge off . Do n’t fucking start , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] “ Okay , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ Are [you]_186-jameson okay ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i ’m fine , ”_[2959-i] [he]_2959-i snaps as [he]_2959-i turns back to [his]_2959-i desk . “ Three days until [our]_3092-our weekend away , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [His]_2959-i phone rings , and [he]_2959-i glances at the screen . “ Ca n’t come soon enough . [I]_2959-i have to take this . See [you]_186-jameson tonight . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i kiss [him]_2959-i softly , and then [he]_2959-i answers the call . [His]_2959-i voice instantly turns to the authoritative tone [he]_2959-i uses with [everyone else]_{1563-everyone else} . [I]_2959-i stand at the door and watch [him]_2959-i as [he]_2959-i listens . [He]_2959-i mindlessly picks up the scotch and sips it before [he]_2959-i talks . [My]_2959-i heart drops . [Many a stressed - out CEO]_{1564-many a stressed - out ceo} has been found in the bottom of a Blue Label scotch bottle . Please , not [mine]_2959-i . . . [I]_2959-i look around guiltily and then back down to [my]_2959-i phone , and [I]_2959-i put into [the search bar]_{1565-the search bar} “ budget weekends away . ”_[2959-i] “ God , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sigh . “ Where can [I]_2959-i take [him]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] “ Are [you]_2959-i still going on about that ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron asks . [Molly]_198-molly slides [her]_198-molly chair to look over [my]_2959-i shoulder . “ [I]_198-molly want to take [him]_2959-i somewhere that money ca n’t buy . ”_[198-molly] [I]_2959-i twist [my]_2959-i lips as [I]_2959-i think . “ It has to be something really special . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron chuckles . “ [Your]_0-aaron special and [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson ’s special may be a little different . ”_[0-aaron] “ The thing is , when [he]_2959-i ’s at [[my]_198-molly apartment]_{766-my apartment} , [he]_2959-i detaches from who [he]_2959-i is . [I]_198-molly want [him]_2959-i to realize that [we]_3094-we do n’t need to live in [a swanky apartment]_{766-my apartment} to be happy . ”_[198-molly] “ [You]_0-aaron ’re fucking crazy . ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly sighs . “ What [I]_198-molly would n’t give to live in [[his]_2959-i swanky apartment]_{766-my apartment} . [Anybody]_457-anybody would be happy as a pig in mud there . When are [you]_0-aaron inviting [us]_3094-we over , [bitch]_0-aaron ? ”_[198-molly] “ Right ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron laughs . “ Hmm . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i narrow [my]_2959-i eyes as [I]_2959-i think . “ What about camping ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly says . [My]_2959-i eyes flick to [her]_198-molly . “ Oh , but [we]_3094-we do n’t have a tent or anything , and [I]_198-molly wo n’t have time to buy it . ”_[198-molly] “ [I]_2959-i ’ve got it all . [You]_0-aaron can borrow [ours]_3094-we . [Michael]_60-michael and [the kids]_{452-the kids} go camping all the time . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stare at [her]_198-molly for a moment . “ Do [you]_0-aaron reckon [he]_60-michael ’s ever gone camping before ? ”_[2959-i] “ Umm . . . that would be a definite no . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron widens [his]_0-aaron eyes to accentuate [his]_0-aaron point . “ [Nobody]_2321-nobody goes camping of [their]_2321-nobody own free will . ”_[0-aaron] Excitement fills [me]_2959-i . “ Really ? Could [we]_3094-we borrow [your]_0-aaron things ? [You]_0-aaron would n’t mind ? ”_[2959-i] “ Not at all . Take it . [Michael]_60-michael and [the kids]_{452-the kids} are going to [Dallas]_30-dallas on Friday to see [[his]_60-michael parents]_{2353-his parents} for a week . [They]_{2353-his parents} wo n’t be using it . ”_[2959-i] “ Maybe . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile as the idea takes shape in [my]_2959-i head . “ But [the car]_{369-the car} , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say , thinking out loud . “ Take [[Michael]_60-michael ’s pickup truck]_{3100-michael ’s pickup truck} , [Bessie]_205-bessie . Give [him]_60-michael [the full Swamp People]_{3101-the full swamp people} experience . ”_[2959-i] “ Really ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smirk as [I]_2959-i imagine [Jameson]_186-jameson in [a pickup]_{1566-a pickup} . “ Yeah , it ’s a total piece of shit , but it ’s reliable . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron shakes [his]_0-aaron head in disgust . “ Are [you]_0-aaron trying to scare [him]_60-michael away on purpose ? ”_[0-aaron] “ No , [I]_2959-i ’m trying to bring [him]_60-michael back to [earth]_872-earth . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile as excitement sweeps through [me]_2959-i . “ [He]_60-michael ’ll land with a thud ; that ’s for sure . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron smirks . [I]_2959-i laugh as [I]_2959-i begin to google campgrounds . “ This is going to be so much fun . ”_[2959-i] On Friday afternoon , [I]_2959-i drive into [the underground parking lot of [[Jameson]_186-jameson ’s building]_{1368-jameson ’s building} with a huge smile on [my]_2959-i face]_{1567-the underground parking lot of jameson ’s building with a huge smile on my face} . [I]_2959-i ’ve laughed all the way here from [[Molly]_198-molly ’s house]_{1569-molly ’s house} . [I]_2959-i ’ve called [Jay]_108-jay and told [him]_108-jay to be waiting near the door for [me]_2959-i to collect [him]_108-jay . [I]_2959-i drive around the corner , and [I]_2959-i see [him]_108-jay standing there waiting with [Alan]_246-alan and [our]_1570-our bags . [He]_108-jay sees [me]_2959-i , and [his]_108-jay face drops . [I]_2959-i honk the horn and bounce in the seat and pull [[Bessie]_205-bessie the pickup truck up beside [him]_108-jay]_{1571-bessie the pickup truck up beside him} . [His]_108-jay face horrified , [he]_108-jay comes to [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i roll down the window . “ Going [my]_108-jay way ? ”_[108-jay] [I]_2959-i ask . “ What the fuck is this ? ”_[108-jay] [he]_108-jay gasps . “ This is [Bessie]_205-bessie . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile proudly . [Alan]_246-alan puts [his]_246-alan hand over [his]_246-alan mouth to stop [himself]_246-alan from laughing out loud . “ What ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson frowns as [he]_246-alan looks at [the huge , beat - up light - blue truck]_{1572-the pickup} . [His]_246-alan eyes come back to [me]_2959-i . “ Get in , [Miles]_186-jameson . ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i smile and wiggle [my]_2959-i eyebrows . “ [I]_246-alan ’m taking [you]_246-alan camping . ”_[246-alan] Chapter 19 [He]_246-alan stares at [me]_2959-i , lost for words . [Alan]_246-alan drops [his]_246-alan head as [his]_246-alan chuckle breaks through . [Jameson]_186-jameson stares at [me]_2959-i . . . horrified . [I]_2959-i laugh out loud at the look on [his]_186-jameson face . [I]_2959-i put [the pickup]_{1572-the pickup} into park and jump out and start throwing [our]_1573-our bags into the back . “ [You]_246-alan ca n’t be serious , ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson stammers . “ Deadly . ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson eyes scan [the beat - up old truck]_{1574-the beat - up old truck} . “ [This car]_{1349-a car} is n’t even roadworthy . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ It ’s not [a car]_{1349-a car} — it ’s [a truck]_{3104-a truck} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile as [I]_2959-i slam the back shut . “ [Her]_{1349-a car} name is [Bessie]_205-bessie . ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson puts [his]_186-jameson hands on [his]_186-jameson hips . [His]_186-jameson eyes glance to [Alan]_246-alan , who is laughing out loud . “ This is n’t fucking funny , [Alan]_246-alan , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson snaps . “ [I]_246-alan do n’t camp , [Emily]_186-jameson . Surely [you]_186-jameson would know this . What on [God]_0-aaron ’s earth would make [you]_186-jameson think of this cockamamie idea ? This is not relaxing [me]_246-alan in the slightest . [I]_246-alan can feel [my]_246-alan blood pressure skyrocketing by the second . ”_[246-alan] [Alan]_246-alan drops [his]_246-alan head and really begins to laugh . “ Forgive [me]_186-jameson , [boss man]_246-alan , but this is the funniest thing [I]_186-jameson ’ve ever seen . Can [I]_186-jameson take a photo for [Tris]_2430-tristan ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson asks . “ Absolutely not , ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson huffs . “ Shut up , or [I]_246-alan ’ll make [you]_186-jameson come with [us]_3105-we . ”_[246-alan] [Alan]_246-alan bites [his]_246-alan bottom lip to stop the giggles . “ Why would [we]_3105-we need to take this . . . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson pauses as [he]_186-jameson finds the right word . “ Hunk of junk ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Because [we]_3105-we ’re going off the grid . ”_[246-alan] “ [Emily Foster]_186-jameson , this is n’t off the grid . This is a recipe for instantaneous death . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i slump in the seat and pull a whiny face . “ [You]_186-jameson promised . It ’s three days , [Jameson]_186-jameson , and then [I]_2959-i ’ll come back and move in . ”_[2959-i] [He]_186-jameson puts [his]_186-jameson hands on [his]_186-jameson hips and rolls [his]_186-jameson eyes , and [he]_186-jameson knows [I]_2959-i ’ve got [him]_186-jameson . [He]_186-jameson did promise . [I]_2959-i toot the horn , and [he]_186-jameson comes around to [the driver]_{530-the driver} ’s side and opens the door . “ What are [you]_3106-you doing ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ Driving . ”_[2959-i] “ Do [you]_3106-you know how to drive a column shift ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ A what ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson frowns . [I]_2959-i point to the gear stick on the steering wheel . [His]_186-jameson face screws up . “ Is this even legal to have on [the road]_{533-the road} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i laugh . “ Yes . ”_[2959-i] “ Then get out . [I]_186-jameson ’m driving . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson pulls [me]_2959-i from [the car]_{369-the car} , and [I]_2959-i jump around to the passenger side and climb in . [He]_186-jameson gets in and goes through the gears with a look of sheer concentration on [his]_186-jameson face . [Alan]_246-alan and [I]_2959-i giggle at each other as [we]_1577-we wait for [him]_186-jameson to work it out . “ Okay , [I]_246-alan ’ve got this , ”_[246-alan] replies [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson , [the control freak]_186-jameson . “ Let ’s go , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sing . “ Toot the horn for [Alan]_246-alan . ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson looks over at [me]_2959-i deadpan , and [I]_2959-i do a “ toot the horn ”_[2959-i] signal that [I]_2959-i used to do to [passing trucks]_{1578-passing trucks} when [I]_2959-i was [a child]_{1579-a child} . “ [Emily]_186-jameson , [I]_246-alan do n’t know what that means , but it ’s a surefire way to get thrown in the trunk . ”_[246-alan] [Alan]_246-alan bursts out laughing again , and [I]_2959-i bounce in the seat in excitement . “ Bye , [Alan]_246-alan , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i call . [He]_246-alan waves . [Jameson]_186-jameson stops and calls to [Alan]_246-alan through the open window . “ Have [your]_246-alan phone on . [We]_3108-we ’re going to need [you]_246-alan to pick [us]_3108-we up from the side of [the road]_{533-the road} in approximately seventeen miles when [we]_3108-we break down . ”_[246-alan] [Alan]_246-alan and [I]_2959-i laugh again , and as [Alan]_246-alan waves , [Jameson]_186-jameson bunny hops [the pickup]_{1572-the pickup} out of [the parking lot]_{1371-the parking lot} . [We]_1582-we get to the security gates , and [he]_246-alan ’s too high and ca n’t swipe [his]_246-alan card . “ Fuck this piece of junk , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan mutters under [his]_246-alan breath as [he]_246-alan puts [the car]_{369-the car} in [park]_2916-park and gets out to open the gates . [He]_246-alan swipes [his]_246-alan card , and the gates slowly open . [He]_246-alan jumps back in and revs [the truck]_{1585-the truck} , and it bunny hops up [the driveway]_{1586-the driveway} to the sound of gears crunching . “ Fuck . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan winces . “ Who owns this piece of shit , anyway ? ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan asks as [we]_1587-we pull out into the [New York]_{385-new york} traffic . “ [Michael]_60-michael , [[Molly]_198-molly ’s husband]_{3110-molly ’s husband} . ”_[246-alan] [His]_246-alan eyes flick to [me]_2959-i . “ Is n’t that [the fucking idiot who OD’d on [Viagra]_26-viagra]_{3111-the fucking idiot who od’d on viagra} , and [you]_{3111-the fucking idiot who od’d on viagra} had to take [him]_{3111-the fucking idiot who od’d on viagra} to [the emergency room]_{3112-the emergency room} ? ”_[246-alan] “ That ’s [him]_{3111-the fucking idiot who od’d on viagra} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . “ Figures , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan mutters as [he]_246-alan drives . “ Okay , where are [we]_3113-we going ? ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i pull up [my]_2959-i maps on [my]_2959-i phone . “ Okay . . . [we]_3113-we need to get on [the interstate]_{3114-the interstate} . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan looks at [me]_2959-i in question . “ [We]_3113-we ’re going to [High Point State Park]_{31-high point state park} , [New Jersey]_{32-new jersey} . ”_[246-alan] “ What ? ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan frowns . “ What in the hell is there ? ”_[246-alan] “ [Me]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile as [I]_2959-i lean over and kiss the side of [his]_246-alan face . “ Nothing but [me]_246-alan . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan smiles as [he]_246-alan keeps [his]_246-alan eyes on [the road]_{533-the road} and slides [his]_246-alan hand over to [my]_2959-i thigh and gives it a squeeze . “ Lucky [you]_2959-i ’re [my]_246-alan favorite thing , then , is n’t it ? ”_[246-alan] A huge beaming smile is plastered across [my]_2959-i face . [He]_246-alan ’s actually doing this . “ It sure is . ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i lean over and begin to kiss [him]_246-alan all over [his]_246-alan cheek . [He]_246-alan scrunches [his]_246-alan face up . “ Stop . It ’s hard enough to drive [Bitchy]_206-bitchy as it is . ”_[246-alan] “ [Her]_206-bitchy name is [Bessie]_205-bessie , not [Bitchy]_206-bitchy . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan smirks . “ [We]_1589-we ’ll see if [she]_206-bitchy gets [us]_1589-we [home]_2289-home in one piece , shall [we]_1589-we ? ”_[246-alan] Two hours later , [we]_1589-we see the sign into [High Point State Park]_{31-high point state park} . There ’s [a dirt road]_{533-the road} , and [Jameson]_186-jameson looks over at [me]_2959-i in question . “ Is this it ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i shrug , suddenly feeling a little nervous . “ Uh - huh . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i look around . “ [I]_2959-i think so . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i really need this weekend to work out ; [I]_2959-i want [us]_1589-we to have fun and relax . Deep down [I]_2959-i know that if [Jay]_108-jay does n’t get a handle on [his]_108-jay stress from work , [I]_2959-i may lose [him]_108-jay anyway . [His]_108-jay temper is not something [I]_2959-i could live with long term . [We]_1589-we turn off [the main road]_{533-the road} and drive down [the track]_{533-the road} . [We]_1589-we both fall silent as [we]_1589-we follow [the trail]_{533-the road} . [I]_2959-i study the map on [my]_2959-i phone . “ It says here to go right to the end of [this road]_{533-the road} and then turn right . ”_[2959-i] “ Okay , ”_[108-jay] [he]_108-jay replies as [the truck]_{1585-the truck} bounces around on [the rough road]_{533-the road} . [His]_108-jay eyes glance over to [me]_2959-i . “ Are [you]_2959-i sure it ’s down here ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug . “ That ’s what it says here . ”_[2959-i] The trees are tall and are blocking out the last of the sun . “ [I]_186-jameson saw a documentary made here once , ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson says as [he]_186-jameson concentrates on [the road]_{533-the road} . “ What was that ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ The Blair Witch Project , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson mutters dryly . [I]_2959-i get the giggles as [we]_1589-we go farther and farther into [the forest]_{1592-the forest} . What the hell was [I]_2959-i thinking ? This is freaking even [me]_2959-i out . [We]_1589-we pass a campsite on the left as [we]_1589-we go down [the hill]_{533-the road} . There ’s [a small tent]_{1593-the tent} , and [two teenage boys]_{1594-two teenage boys} are sitting at [an open campfire]_{1595-an open campfire} . [I]_2959-i watch [them]_{1594-two teenage boys} as [we]_1589-we pass . “ [They]_{1594-two teenage boys} look like [they]_{1594-two teenage boys} ’re having fun . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . “ [They]_{1594-two teenage boys} ’re about to go into [the tent]_{1593-the tent} and take turns fucking each other , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson mutters . “ Only logical explanation as to why [they]_{1594-two teenage boys} would come out here . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smirk . “ Will [you]_2959-i stop being so pessimistic ? It ’s three nights , and [we]_1589-we get to be alone without [anyone]_272-anyone around . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson nods and then frowns as [he]_186-jameson thinks of something . “ Where are [the bathrooms]_{3117-the bathrooms} ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson eyes flick to [me]_2959-i . “ [We]_1589-we have [[our]_1589-we own bathroom]_{3118-our own bathroom} , right ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Well . . . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pause . “ Well , what ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson snaps . “ [I]_186-jameson am not fucking staying anywhere without [a bathroom]_{3119-a bathroom} , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ There are [bathrooms]_{3120-bathrooms} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i turn the phone map around as [I]_2959-i try to locate where [they]_1596-they are from [[our]_1597-our tent]_{1598-our tent} . “ Ah yes , here [they]_1596-they are . Just a short trek . ”_[2959-i] “ A trek ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson eyes flick anxiously to [me]_2959-i . “ Define trek . ”_{[262-oh man]} [Oh man]_{262-oh man} , it ’s a long trek , but [I]_2959-i wo n’t tell [him]_{262-oh man} that just yet . [He]_{262-oh man} ’s likely to turn around . “ It ’s close — don’t worry , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i lie . [We]_1600-we get to [the bottom of [the hill]_{1590-the hill}]_{1601-the bottom of the hill} , and [the road]_{533-the road} goes into a fork . [A lake]_{1604-a lake} is straight ahead , and the sunlight is just beginning to fade . [I]_2959-i smile in excitement . “ Turn right . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson carefully turns right , and [we]_1600-we go along a little bit . “ Should be just up here . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Where ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson frowns . “ Just park anywhere . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ What do [you]_{262-oh man} mean ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson eyes come over to [me]_2959-i . “ [We]_1600-we just set up where [we]_1600-we want . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ What , [like”—he]_{207-like”—he[186-jameson]} screws up [his]_186-jameson face as [he]_186-jameson looks around—“on the dirt ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i laugh . “ Were [you]_{262-oh man} expecting oak parquetry floor ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson rolls [his]_186-jameson eyes and parks [the truck]_{1585-the truck} , and [I]_2959-i get out and walk up and down [the water]_{1079-the water} ’s edge . “ What are [you]_{262-oh man} doing ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson asks . “ Looking for a good spot to set up . It needs to be high and flat . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Why high ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson asks as [he]_186-jameson starts to look around . “ In case it rains . ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson eyes come to [me]_2959-i in horror . “ Do n’t even say that . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Quick , [we]_1600-we have to get a move on . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Why ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ It ’s getting dark . [We]_1600-we ’re running out of sunlight . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson looks up at the sky . “ Do [we]_1600-we have lighting ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [We]_1600-we have a flashlight and two of those little headlight things that strap on [our]_1600-we heads . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Good grief , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson snaps as [he]_186-jameson begins to throw the things out of the back with urgency . “ [I]_186-jameson ’m not wearing a fucking strap - on headlight in [this stupid man - versus - wild experiment]_{3121-this stupid man - versus - wild experiment} . It ’s bad enough when [I]_186-jameson can see . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i laugh as [I]_2959-i grab [the tent]_{1593-the tent} in its bag and begin to unpack it . [I]_2959-i hand [him]_186-jameson the broom . “ Sweep the dirt . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson looks at [me]_2959-i , completely lost . “ What ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Sweep the dirt — clear a patch for [us]_1600-we . No sticks or anything can be under [the tent]_{1593-the tent} . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Sweep the dirt , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson repeats . “ Yes , [Jameson]_186-jameson . Hurry up , or [you]_186-jameson will be doing it in the dark . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Jesus Christ . . . now [I]_186-jameson ’ve heard it all , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson mutters as [he]_186-jameson begins to sweep a patch of dirt to clear it . “ Who sweeps fucking dirt ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [Campers]_3122-campers . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smirk as [I]_2959-i open the instructions , and then [my]_2959-i face falls . The instructions look like [they]_1608-they ’re to build a nuclear reactor . Oh jeez , [Molly]_198-molly said it was easy to put up . Okay . . . whatever . It will be fine . [I]_2959-i inwardly begin to panic . [We]_1609-we are not going [home]_2289-home . [I]_2959-i spread [the tent]_{1593-the tent} out , and [I]_2959-i hear a slap . “ Ow . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i keep concentrating as [I]_2959-i get the poles out of [their]_1608-they bag . [I]_2959-i hear another slap . “ What the hell ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson cries . “ What ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ These bugs are from [Jurassic Park]_{33-jurassic park} . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson swings [his]_186-jameson arms around to get them off [him]_186-jameson . “ No bugs are this big . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i go back to [my]_2959-i instructions . Okay , so it says here that this pole goes into this . . . “ Ahh , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson cries as [he]_186-jameson slaps [his]_186-jameson arm . “ [I]_2959-i ’m getting fucking malaria over here , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes . “ Stop being [a baby]_{3123-a baby} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i put the pole into [the correct place]_{1612-the correct place} . “ Can [you]_186-jameson grab the corner and stretch it out , please ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson swings [his]_186-jameson arms around and goes and gets the corner of [the tent]_{1593-the tent} and stretches it out . The sun is just setting . “ Step back a little farther , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say . [He]_186-jameson slaps [his]_186-jameson legs . “ Fuck off , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson whispers as [he]_186-jameson swings [his]_186-jameson arms around , trying to swat whatever it is [he]_186-jameson ’s swatting . “ Step back farther . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson walks backward and trips over a rock and falls into a bush . “ Ah , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson cries . “ Oh . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i burst out laughing and run to help [him]_186-jameson up . “ What kind of fucking lunatic does this for fun ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson splutters as [he]_186-jameson climbs out of the bush . “ [We]_3124-we do . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i laugh . “ This is n’t fun , [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson huffs as [he]_186-jameson brushes the dirt off [him]_186-jameson . “ This is a living hell in a hydroponic mutated - bug breeding zone . ”_{[186-jameson]} Something bites [him]_186-jameson again , and [he]_186-jameson slaps [his]_186-jameson neck . “ Fuck off , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson whispers to the bug . “ For [God]_0-aaron ’s sake , get the bug spray , [princess]_186-jameson . It ’s in the bag of supplies in [the truck]_{1585-the truck} . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [We]_3124-we have bug spray ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson looks at [me]_2959-i deadpan . “ Now [you]_2959-i fucking tell [me]_186-jameson , after [I]_186-jameson ’ve lost four pints of blood already . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson storms to [the truck]_{1585-the truck} , and [I]_2959-i hear the spray can go . . . and go . . . and go . . . and go . “ Are [you]_2959-i saving any for [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i call . “ This is [man]_2430-tristan versus wild , and [every man]_{3126-every man} is for [himself]_{3126-every man} . Do n’t [you]_2959-i watch [Survivor]_208-survivor ? [I]_186-jameson ’m voting [you]_2959-i off [the island]_{3127-the island} tonight , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson calls before launching into a coughing attack and waving the air in front of [him]_186-jameson . “ What the hell is in this stuff , anyway ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Poison . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i widen [my]_2959-i eyes . “ To kill the bugs . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson storms back over . “ Hurry up with [the tent]_{1593-the tent} , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson demands . “ What ’s taking so long ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [You]_2959-i put it up if [you]_2959-i ’re so perfect , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . “ Fine . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson snatches the directions from [me]_2959-i and stares at [them]_1615-them for a moment as [his]_186-jameson eyes flick to [the outstretched tent]_{1593-the tent} . [He]_186-jameson turns the paper around and twists [his]_186-jameson head . “ Well , this all makes perfect sense now . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ It does ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ [I]_2959-i could n’t work it out at all . ”_[2959-i] “ This is n’t directions to put up [a tent]_{1593-the tent} — this is a map for an escape from [Alcatraz]_34-alcatraz . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i burst out laughing . “ What ’s funny ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson barks . “ Nothing about this situation is funny , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson turns the page and then turns it again and then again . [We]_1617-we both frown as [we]_1617-we stare at it . “ Okay , [I]_1617-we see now . ”_[1617-we] “ [You]_1617-we do ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask hopefully . “ No . [I]_2959-i do n’t . [We]_1617-we find [a hotel]_{2332-a hotel} . ”_[2959-i] “ [Jameson]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i plead . “ [I]_186-jameson wanted to do something with [you]_186-jameson that [you]_186-jameson ’ve never done with [an ex - girlfriend]_{3129-an ex - girlfriend} . [I]_186-jameson just wanted [us]_1617-we to do this first together . Will [you]_186-jameson just humor [me]_186-jameson , please ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson exhales heavily . [I]_2959-i take [his]_186-jameson hands in [mine]_2959-i . “ [I]_2959-i know this is n’t what [you]_186-jameson ’re used to , but [I]_2959-i wanted to take [you]_186-jameson out of [[your]_186-jameson comfort zone]_{3130-your comfort zone} . [I]_2959-i really want to do this — it ’s important to [me]_2959-i . This is how uncomfortable [I]_2959-i feel in [[your]_186-jameson fancy apartment]_{2751-your fancy apartment} . ”_[2959-i] “ Not possible . ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson eyes hold [mine]_2959-i , and then [he]_186-jameson exhales in defeat . “ Fine . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson begins to study the directions again ; the light is fading , and [he]_186-jameson ’s squinting to see . [I]_2959-i go to the supply box and take out the two headlights and put one on [his]_186-jameson head and then [my]_2959-i own . [I]_2959-i switch them on . [He]_186-jameson looks up at [me]_2959-i deadpan . [I]_2959-i put [my]_2959-i hand over [my]_2959-i mouth as [I]_2959-i get the giggles , and [he]_186-jameson continues reading the directions . “ Okay , it says the poles are in a separate bag , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson says . “ Got [them]_3132-them . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ And [we]_3133-we need to peg out the corners . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Already done it . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i rub [my]_2959-i hand down [his]_186-jameson back and onto [his]_186-jameson behind . [He]_186-jameson swats [me]_2959-i away . “ [We]_3133-we need to put the poles in the end and hoist [them]_3132-them up . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Okay . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i lean up to kiss [him]_186-jameson . “ [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson looks at [me]_2959-i , and the flashlight strapped to [his]_186-jameson forehead shines in [my]_2959-i eyes . “ [I]_2959-i smell like a toxic dumping ground of bug poison , and [I]_2959-i have never felt so unsexy in [my]_2959-i entire life . [I]_2959-i would n’t be surprised if [my]_2959-i dick has been poisoned off like a weed . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i burst out laughing . “ [You]_186-jameson could never be unsexy to [me]_186-jameson , and [your]_186-jameson dick is more of a tree than a weed . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson raises [his]_186-jameson eyebrow , unimpressed . [I]_2959-i get the uncontrollable giggles . [He]_186-jameson really does look ridiculous . [I]_2959-i want to take a photo for [Alan]_246-alan , but [I]_2959-i know [he]_186-jameson would go postal . [He]_186-jameson ’s teetering on the edge here . “ Okay , let ’s just get in and do it , and then [we]_3134-you can pump up the bed . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i smile . [His]_186-jameson face falls . “ [We]_3134-you have to pump up a bed ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ No . [You]_3134-you have to blow it up with [your]_3134-you mouth , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i tease . [He]_186-jameson throws the directions in the air . “ That ’s it — [I’m]_186-jameson out . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i burst out laughing . “ No , [you]_3134-you do n’t . [I]_186-jameson ’m only teasing . [We]_3134-you have a pump . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson puts [his]_186-jameson hand on [his]_186-jameson hips and stares at [me]_2959-i for a moment . “ [Jameson]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile softly . “ This weekend is symbolic in [our]_3134-you relationship . [You]_3134-you ’re expecting [me]_186-jameson to give up everything [I]_186-jameson know to live in a world that ’s completely foreign to [me]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson stares at [me]_2959-i . “ [I]_2959-i ’m just asking [you]_3134-you for three days . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i bounce on the spot . “ Please . Can [you]_3134-you just do this . . . for [me]_186-jameson ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson pinches the bridge of [his]_186-jameson nose , and [I]_2959-i know [I]_2959-i ’ve nearly got [him]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i lean up and kiss [his]_186-jameson big lips . “ [I]_2959-i ’ll make it up to [you]_3134-you . [I]_2959-i promise . ”_[2959-i] “ Fine , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson snaps as [he]_186-jameson bends and picks the directions up and begins to reread [them]_1618-them . “ Get [me]_186-jameson the longest pole . ”_{[186-jameson]} Two hours later , [the tent]_{1593-the tent} is finally up . The bed is ready , and [I]_2959-i put out two fold - up chairs . “ Come sit with [me]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile as [I]_2959-i open a bottle of red wine . [He]_186-jameson sits down beside [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i pass [him]_186-jameson [his]_186-jameson glass . [I]_2959-i brought two wineglasses . [I]_2959-i knew if [I]_2959-i tried to make [him]_186-jameson drink out of a plastic cup , it would have been all over . [He]_186-jameson sits in [his]_186-jameson cheap fold - up chair and takes [his]_186-jameson glass from [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i smile and raise [mine]_2959-i to [him]_186-jameson . “ To a successful escape from [Alcatraz]_34-alcatraz . ”_[2959-i] [He]_186-jameson smirks and takes a sip and looks around at the darkness . “ Okay , so what do [we]_3135-we do now ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ This is it . ”_[2959-i] “ This is it ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson frowns . “ Yeah . . . [you]_186-jameson just sit here . ”_[2959-i] “ And do what ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Relax . ”_[2959-i] “ Oh . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson looks around at [the dark forest]_{1592-the forest} and sips [his]_186-jameson wine , and [I]_2959-i bite [my]_2959-i bottom lip to stop [myself]_2959-i from laughing . It ’s completely dark now , and [the forest]_{1592-the forest} is beginning to come alive with animals . Echoes can be heard in the distance . [He]_186-jameson ’s in complete freak - out mode inside and holding it in . [He]_186-jameson tips [his]_186-jameson head back and drains [his]_186-jameson glass and holds it out for an immediate refill . “ What are [you]_186-jameson doing ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [I]_186-jameson ’m getting plastered so [I]_186-jameson do n’t remember getting eaten by a bear . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson shakes [his]_186-jameson head . “ It ’s the only way . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i laugh . “ This is completely safe , [Jameson]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson widens [his]_186-jameson eyes . “ That ’s what [Daniel]_{117-danny rupert} said right before [he]_186-jameson went missing . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Who ’s [Daniel]_{117-danny rupert} ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [Blair Witch Daniel]_{209-blair witch daniel} . . . ever watched it ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson mutters dryly as [he]_186-jameson looks around . “ No . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smirk . “ Probably best [you]_{209-blair witch daniel} do n’t . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson looks around at [the forest]_{1592-the forest} . “ Hauntingly familiar . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i laugh as [I]_2959-i get up . “ [I]_2959-i ’m going to [the bathroom]_{300-the bathroom} . ”_[2959-i] “ What ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson stands in a rush . “ Where ’s that ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Up [the trail]_{1590-the hill} . ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson face falls . “ [You]_{209-blair witch daniel} ca n’t walk up there alone . It ’s dangerous . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ No . [I]_186-jameson ’m not . [You]_{209-blair witch daniel} ’re coming with [me]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ What ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson frowns . “ Come on , [Jay]_108-jay . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ No , [we]_3138-we are not leaving [the campsite]_{3139-the campsite} . [I]_2959-i do n’t want to be walking around . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile as [I]_2959-i look down at [the lake]_{1622-the lake} . The moonlight is dancing across [the water]_{1079-the water} . “ All right . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stand and take [my]_2959-i shirt off and then slide [my]_2959-i panties down . “ What are [you]_{209-blair witch daniel} doing ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_186-jameson ’m going skinny - dipping . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ What ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson eyes flick to the black water . “ No . . . no [you]_{209-blair witch daniel} ’re not . [I]_186-jameson forbid it . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i take off [my]_2959-i bra and throw it over [his]_186-jameson head , and [he]_186-jameson snatches it away . “ [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i kick [my]_2959-i panties off . “ Have [you]_{209-blair witch daniel} gone completely fucking crazy ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson whispers . “ Maybe . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson looks around . “ [Anybody]_457-anybody could be watching . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i smile and run to [the water]_{1079-the water} ’s edge . “ [You]_{209-blair witch daniel} coming in , chicken ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i wade thigh high into the water . “ Are [you]_{209-blair witch daniel} fucking insane ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson cries from [the water]_{1079-the water} ’s edge . [I]_2959-i splash water [his]_186-jameson way . “ Get in , yellowbelly . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson runs [his]_186-jameson hands through [his]_186-jameson hair in a complete panic . “ [Emily]_186-jameson , this is not safe . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ This is a lot safer than [New York]_{385-new york} , [Jay]_108-jay . Come on . . . live a little . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson looks left , and then [he]_186-jameson looks right as [he]_186-jameson clenches [his]_186-jameson hands at [his]_186-jameson sides . “ [Jay]_108-jay , come on , [baby]_108-jay . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile as [I]_2959-i lower [myself]_2959-i into the water . “ [I]_186-jameson ’ll protect [you]_108-jay . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson closes [his]_186-jameson eyes . [He]_186-jameson wants to come in — [I]_2959-i know [he]_186-jameson does . “ Come on . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i laugh as [I]_2959-i swim . “ The water is beautiful . ”_[2959-i] With a shake of [his]_186-jameson head , [he]_186-jameson takes [his]_186-jameson shirt off and throws it to the side . [I]_2959-i laugh as [I]_2959-i float on [my]_2959-i back . [He]_186-jameson begins to wade into the water . “ Take [your]_186-jameson shorts off . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ No way in hell am [I]_186-jameson offering [my]_186-jameson dick as live bait for a fucking eel , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson barks . [He]_186-jameson wades to [me]_2959-i and takes [me]_2959-i into [his]_186-jameson arms . The water is cold and fresh , and [I]_2959-i wrap [my]_2959-i arms around [his]_186-jameson neck . The moonlight is beaming off the water , and [he]_186-jameson smiles as [he]_186-jameson kisses [me]_2959-i gently . “ [You]_186-jameson ’re crazy , [Emily Foster]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ And [I]_2959-i love [you]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile up at [him]_186-jameson . This does feel crazy . . . crazy good . “ [You]_186-jameson better . ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson lips dust [mine]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i wrap [my]_2959-i legs around [his]_186-jameson waist as [I]_2959-i feel [my]_2959-i arousal wake from its slumber . [Our]_1625-we kiss turns passionate . “ [I]_2959-i think [we]_1625-we need to christen [the lake]_{1622-the lake} , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper up at [him]_186-jameson . “ [You]_186-jameson ’re a complete sex maniac . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile as [I]_2959-i kiss [him]_186-jameson and pull [his]_186-jameson shorts down a little . “ [We]_1625-we ’ve already established this . Now fuck [me]_186-jameson , [Lake Boy]_{210-lake boy} , before [your]_186-jameson wiener gets eaten , and [I]_186-jameson do n’t mean by [me]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson smirks against [my]_2959-i lips as [he]_186-jameson grabs [my]_2959-i behind . “ Shut up . [You]_186-jameson ’re wrecking it . ”_{[186-jameson]} Drop . Drop . Drop , drop . From [my]_2959-i deep slumber , [I]_2959-i hear rain as it sprinkles onto [the tent]_{1593-the tent} . Drop , drop , drop . It gets heavier . “ Do n’t fucking tell [me]_186-jameson , ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson whispers from beside [me]_2959-i . Crash sounds the thunder , and [we]_1627-we both jump in fright as [the forest]_{1592-the forest} flashes white . “ [You]_186-jameson ca n’t be serious , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson mutters into the darkness . [My]_2959-i back is to [Jay]_108-jay , and [I]_2959-i bite [my]_2959-i lip to try to stop [myself]_2959-i from laughing . [He]_186-jameson had a complete meltdown when [we]_1627-we got into bed over the sound of the animals in [the forest]_{1592-the forest} keeping [him]_186-jameson awake — in fact , [he]_186-jameson ’s had about ten meltdowns . This will be the icing on the cake . The rain really begins to come down , and thunder begins to crack repeatedly . “ Well , this is just fucking great , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson huffs . [I]_2959-i smile and roll over to face [him]_186-jameson . “ It ’s fine . Tents are waterproof . Just go back to sleep . ”_[2959-i] [The tent]_{1593-the tent} continually lights up an iridescent white as lightning flashes through the sky . [He]_186-jameson sits up and feels around [the tent]_{1593-the tent} in the dark . [He]_186-jameson ’s foraging for a long time on [his]_186-jameson hands and knees . “ What are [you]_3142-you doing ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Looking for a fucking light ! ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i laugh out loud . “ How do [you]_3142-you find this funny ? Not one fucking thing about this is funny , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson finally finds the light and puts it on [his]_186-jameson head and switches it on and looks at [me]_2959-i . [His]_186-jameson hair is all mussed and sticking up everywhere , and [his]_186-jameson eyes are wide and crazy . Unable to help it , [I]_2959-i get an uncontrollable fit of the giggles . “ What ? ”_[2959-i] “ If [you]_3142-you could . . . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i have to stop talking because [I]_2959-i ’m laughing so much . “ If [you]_3142-you could just see [yourself]_3142-you . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson smirks , and then a crash of lightning hits so close it sounds like it hit a tree right next to [us]_1630-we . “ [We]_1630-we ’re going to fucking die tonight , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson stammers in a panic . The rain hammers down , and [I]_2959-i unzip [the tent]_{1593-the tent} . [We]_1630-we both peer out into the apocalyptic storm . It ’s really pouring down , and [I]_2959-i zip [the tent]_{1593-the tent} back up . “ It ’s fine . [The tent]_{1593-the tent} is waterproof , and [we]_1630-we ’ll just have to try to sleep through it . ”_[2959-i] “ Have [you]_3142-you lost [your]_3142-you fucking mind ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson snaps . “ Who could sleep through this ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [Me]_2959-i — [I]_2959-i could . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i lie back down and pull the sleeping bag blanket over [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i smile when [I]_2959-i remember [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s earlier meltdown that [he]_186-jameson could n’t touch [me]_2959-i in [my]_2959-i sleeping bag . In an hour - long operation , [he]_186-jameson unzipped both of [our]_1630-we bags and put one underneath [us]_1630-we and one over the top of [us]_1630-we so that [we]_1630-we could cuddle while [we]_1630-we sleep . [He]_186-jameson ’s super cute . [The tent]_{1593-the tent} begins to sway side to side as the windstorm picks up . “ Holy fucking . . . here [we]_1630-we go , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson mutters as [he]_186-jameson looks at the ceiling of [the tent]_{1593-the tent} . One end of [the tent]_{1593-the tent} lifts up in the wind , and [he]_186-jameson pounces over and holds [the tent]_{1593-the tent} to the ground . [I]_2959-i burst out laughing again . “ Not helping , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson cries . [I]_2959-i jump up in [my]_2959-i fits of giggles and grab [his]_186-jameson jacket and begin to put it on . “ What are [you]_3143-you doing ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson frowns . “ [I]_186-jameson have to hammer the tent pegs back in . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i put [my]_2959-i headlamp on [my]_2959-i head . [His]_186-jameson mouth drops open in horror . “ What ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ It ’s the only way [the tent]_{1593-the tent} will stay up . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [You]_3143-you ’re not going out there . It ’s dangerous , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson whispers angrily . “ [Somebody]_182-somebody has to do it . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pick up the hammer . [He]_186-jameson snatches the hammer from [me]_2959-i . “ This will fucking do [me]_186-jameson in . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i laugh . “ Goodbye , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson unzips [the tent]_{1593-the tent} . “ It was nice knowing [you]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson disappears out into the storm . “ This is why [you]_186-jameson ’re [the CEO]_{2388-the ceo} . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i giggle as [I]_2959-i hear the metallic bangs as [he]_186-jameson hammers the tent pegs back in . The rain really begins to pour down , and the wind is ferocious . Honestly , what are the chances ? Damn [you]_1634-you , weather . [I]_2959-i unzip [the tent]_{1593-the tent} and peer out into the pouring rain . [He]_186-jameson ’s struggling to stay on [his]_186-jameson feet from the wind as [he]_186-jameson bends down and hammers tent pegs into the ground , headlamp still firmly in place . [He]_186-jameson ’s muddy and sopping wet . [I]_2959-i get the uncontrollable giggles once more , and unable to help it , [I]_2959-i grab [my]_2959-i phone and take some photos of [him]_186-jameson . Surely one day [he]_186-jameson ’ll find this funny . After ten minutes , [he]_186-jameson comes back in . [He]_186-jameson ’s panting , wet , and covered in mud from the splashing of the rain . [I]_2959-i grab a towel and begin to dry [his]_186-jameson hair . [I]_2959-i peel [his]_186-jameson shirt off [him]_186-jameson and slide down [his]_186-jameson track pants . “ Just get dry . It ’s going to stop soon , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say to try to calm [him]_186-jameson . The sound of the rain is deafening above [us]_1635-we , and [he]_186-jameson dries [himself]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i shuffle through [his]_186-jameson bag and find [him]_186-jameson some dry clothes , and [the tent]_{1593-the tent} begins to sway again as [he]_186-jameson hops around half - wet , trying to get dressed . [The tent]_{1593-the tent} lifts again . “ Get fucked , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson snaps . Oh [[my]_2959-i God]_{2363-my god} — this really is horrendous . [We]_1635-we hear a loud rip in the roof , and [our]_1635-we eyes widen . “ Oh no . . . [the tent]_{1593-the tent} , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ [We]_1635-we ca n’t damage [the tent]_{1593-the tent} — it ’s [Michael]_60-michael ’s . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_186-jameson ’ll buy [the poor prick a camper]_{3145-the poor prick a camper} . This is fucking intolerable , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson splutters . Rip . [The tent]_{1593-the tent} rips in half . “ Ah , ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i scream as [our]_1635-we things go flying everywhere in the wind . [I]_2959-i scurry to the ground as [I]_2959-i try to throw everything into bags . [Some kind of sanity rubber band]_{1638-some kind of sanity rubber band} breaks inside [him]_186-jameson , and [he]_186-jameson puts [his]_186-jameson hands on [his]_186-jameson hips , tips [his]_186-jameson head back to the sky , and bursts out laughing . “ This is n’t funny . Get [our]_1635-we bags to [the truck]_{1585-the truck} , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i cry . [He]_186-jameson laughs . . . and laughs . . . and laughs . [I]_2959-i scramble to keep [our]_1635-we phones dry and run to [the truck]_{1585-the truck} with [our]_1635-we bags . “ [Jameson]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i yell . “ Do something . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson turns to [me]_2959-i and takes [me]_2959-i in [his]_186-jameson arms in the pouring rain and kisses [me]_2959-i . [Our]_1635-we headlamps hit together , and [I]_2959-i laugh too . “ This is ridiculous , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ Hotel ? ”_[2959-i] “ Please . ”_[2959-i] “ Hello . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile at [the receptionist of [the tourist center]_{1641-the tourist center}]_{1640-the receptionist of the tourist center} . “ Have [you]_3146-you got any B and Bs available for two nights , please ? ”_[2959-i] [The woman behind the desk]_{1642-the woman behind the desk} types away . [We]_1635-we stayed in [a hideous hotel]_{1643-a hideous hotel} last night , and [Jameson]_186-jameson refuses to stay there again . [He]_186-jameson said [we]_1635-we can only stay the full weekend if [I]_2959-i find somewhere half - decent for the next two nights . [He]_186-jameson ’s chasing coffee outside for [us]_1635-we . The rain is gone , and at some stage [we]_1635-we have to go back and pick up the camping stuff from the Armageddon storm last night . [We]_1635-we just got [our]_1635-we things and left . There was nothing [we]_1635-we could do in the middle of the night in those conditions anyway . “ [I]_{1642-the woman behind the desk} only have [a farmhouse]_{270-the house} . ”_{[1642-the woman behind the desk]} [She]_{1642-the woman behind the desk} types and then reads . “ [Arndell]_211-arndell is [the property]_{270-the house} . ”_{[1642-the woman behind the desk]} [I]_2959-i frown as [I]_2959-i listen . “ It ’s available for two nights , and [you]_3148-you can have that at a discounted rate if [you]_3148-you want . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . [I]_2959-i love that [she]_{1642-the woman behind the desk} thinks [we]_1635-we need a discount . “ Okay , that sounds good . Thank [you]_3148-you . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i slide over [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s credit card , and [she]_{1642-the woman behind the desk} does the paperwork . “ Here are the keys . ”_{[1642-the woman behind the desk]} [She]_{1642-the woman behind the desk} hands [me]_2959-i a map . “ Go down to [Falls Road]_{35-falls road} , and then [the property]_{270-the house} has [[its]_{270-the house} own road]_{35-falls road} in on the right . ”_{[1642-the woman behind the desk]} “ Oh , how big is it ? ”_{[1642-the woman behind the desk]} “ [The house]_{270-the house} is on [three hundred acres]_{3149-three hundred acres} . [The land]_{270-the house} is gorgeous . [The house]_{270-the house} is a little tired , but the location is stunning . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . “ Cool , okay . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i bounce out to [the pickup]_{1572-the pickup} to see [[my]_2959-i poor disheveled man]_{1645-my poor disheveled man} . [He]_{1645-my poor disheveled man} looks like [he]_{1645-my poor disheveled man} ’s been to hell and back , and funnily enough , [I]_2959-i think it ’s the most relaxed [I]_2959-i ’ve ever seen [him]_{1645-my poor disheveled man} . It ’s as if that sanity rubber band that broke in [him]_{1645-my poor disheveled man} last night released some of [his]_{1645-my poor disheveled man} tension . “ Okay , [we]_3150-we got [a farmhouse]_{3147-the property} . ”_{[1645-my poor disheveled man]} [He]_{1645-my poor disheveled man} reaches over and puts [his]_{1645-my poor disheveled man} hand on [my]_2959-i thigh and hands [me]_2959-i [my]_2959-i coffee . [He]_{1645-my poor disheveled man} shifts the gears on the steering wheel and pulls out . [I]_2959-i smile out the window as [I]_2959-i ride in [the bumpy truck]_{1646-the bumpy truck} . “ Do [you]_3152-you know [we]_1648-we have n’t passed [a car]_{1349-a car} ? ”_{[1645-my poor disheveled man]} [he]_{1645-my poor disheveled man} says as [he]_{1645-my poor disheveled man} keeps [his]_{1645-my poor disheveled man} eyes on [the road]_{533-the road} . “ It ’s nice , is n’t it ? ”_{[1645-my poor disheveled man]} [He]_{1645-my poor disheveled man} shrugs . “ Different . ”_{[1645-my poor disheveled man]} [We]_1648-we follow the directions , and ten minutes later [we]_1648-we get to a big stone entryway with the sign . [ARNDELL]_211-arndell “ This is it . ”_{[211-arndell]} [We]_1648-we turn up [the driveway]_{1586-the driveway} , and [I]_2959-i smile . [The road]_{533-the road} is lined with huge trees that create a canopy . [Rolling green hills]_{1650-rolling green hills} are as far as [you]_1651-you can see . “ Oh , look at [this place]_{3147-the property} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile in wonder . “ [She]_3154-she said [the land]_{3147-the property} was beautiful . ”_[2959-i] For five minutes , [we]_1648-we drive through until [we]_1648-we get to the top of [a hill]_{1652-a hill} and find [a big old house]_{3147-the property} . It ’s white with a sweeping veranda around the edge . The roof is made of shingles , and it must be a hundred years old . [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s eyes find [me]_2959-i . “ Do n’t say anything . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i smirk . [He]_186-jameson holds [his]_186-jameson hands up in the air as if crying defeat . [We]_1648-we climb out and open the front door and peer in . [I]_2959-i smile broadly . Wide - timber floors , a huge fireplace , and great big windows with views out over [the property]_{3147-the property} . [You]_1655-you can see for miles from up here . The furniture is dated , but that does n’t matter to [us]_1648-we . [I]_2959-i take [Jay]_108-jay ’s hand as [we]_1648-we walk through and look around . A large living area , [a formal dining room]_{1656-a formal dining room} , [a big kitchen]_{1657-a big kitchen} , [a bathroom]_{3119-a bathroom} , and [a bedroom]_{1659-a bedroom} are [downstairs]_{2454-downstairs} . There ’s [an old timber staircase]_{1661-an old timber staircase} , and [we]_1648-we go up to find [five bedrooms]_{1662-five bedrooms} and [another bathroom]_{1663-another bathroom} . [I]_2959-i turn to [Jameson]_186-jameson and wrap [my]_2959-i arms around [his]_186-jameson neck . “ Is this better , [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson smiles as [he]_186-jameson bends to kiss [me]_2959-i . “ This will do . ”_{[186-jameson]} [We]_1648-we lie on a blanket in the grass , and the sun is warm on [our]_1648-we faces . It ’s Sunday afternoon , and [we]_1648-we are in a sleepy haze . Last night was heaven . [We]_1648-we lit the fire , and [Jay]_108-jay humored [me]_2959-i and helped [me]_2959-i carry the mattress out so that [we]_1648-we could sleep next to it . Today [we]_1648-we have explored [the property]_{3147-the property} and went into [town]_2456-town to grab some groceries in [[our]_1648-we light - blue pickup truck]_{1666-our light - blue pickup truck} . [Jameson]_186-jameson is relaxed for the first time since [we]_1648-we met . [I]_2959-i ’m happy . . . so happy . [I]_2959-i roll to face [him]_186-jameson . “ Tell [me]_2959-i about [your]_2959-i relationship with [Claudia]_57-claudia . ”_[2959-i] [He]_186-jameson frowns and rolls to [his]_186-jameson side toward [me]_2959-i . “ What do [you]_2959-i want to know ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Everything . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson reaches up and brushes [his]_186-jameson finger over [my]_2959-i bottom lip . “ It was n’t like what [we]_1648-we have . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ How so ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Well , [we]_1648-we were [friends]_394-friends for a long time . There was never this instant attraction or . . . ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson voice trails off . “ No , go on , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i urge . “ [I]_2959-i want to know . ”_[2959-i] “ [She]_57-claudia did some stories for [us]_1648-we , and [we]_1648-we got to know each other . Then . . . over time [we]_1648-we built a friendship . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i watch [him]_186-jameson . “ [I]_186-jameson thought . . . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson hesitates and plays with the blanket underneath [him]_186-jameson as [he]_186-jameson thinks for a moment . “ [You]_186-jameson thought what ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [I]_186-jameson thought [she]_57-claudia was the love of [my]_186-jameson life . [She]_57-claudia was like [me]_186-jameson . Driven . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson shrugs . “ [She]_57-claudia got [me]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [My]_2959-i stomach twists in jealousy . “ [We]_3156-we were together for three years . Engaged . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ [You]_186-jameson were engaged ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i did n’t know this . It was on [her]_1667-she bio but not [his]_186-jameson , and [I]_2959-i was hoping it was wrong . “ Yes . ”_{[186-jameson]} [My]_2959-i eyes hold [his]_186-jameson . “ What happened ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson exhales heavily . “ [She]_1667-she was offered the job as editor in chief for British Vogue . It was a huge thing , and [she]_1667-she had worked so hard to get it . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i watch [him]_186-jameson as [he]_186-jameson speaks . “ [She]_1667-she moved and . . . ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson voice trails off . “ What ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [We]_3157-we tried the long - distance thing , and [I]_2959-i struggled with no sex . It ’s not who [I]_2959-i am . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ So [we]_3157-we made a pact that [we]_3157-we would be with [other people]_{2290-other people} but try again in a few years . [We]_3157-we had a five - year plan of getting back together . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i heart sinks . [He]_186-jameson still loves [her]_76-woman . “ But then a year ago [I]_2959-i met [this girl]_76-woman on [a plane]_{2325-a plane} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smirk . “ And [she]_76-woman was everything that [I]_2959-i was n’t looking for . ”_[2959-i] [Our]_1669-our eyes are locked , and the air crackles between [us]_1669-our . “ But [I]_186-jameson could n’t pursue [her]_76-woman because of [my]_186-jameson promise to [Claudia]_57-claudia . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson takes [my]_2959-i face in [his]_186-jameson hand , and [his]_186-jameson thumb dusts back and forth over [my]_2959-i bottom lip . “ [I]_186-jameson wanted to . [I]_186-jameson desperately wanted to . [I]_186-jameson felt a physical connection with [her]_76-woman from the word go . [I]_186-jameson was hard the entire plane trip , and [our]_1669-our night together was insane . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson smiles softly . “ There was something about [her]_76-woman that [I]_186-jameson could n’t forget . [She]_76-woman lingered in the back of [my]_186-jameson mind . [I]_186-jameson compared all sex and [women]_276-women with [her]_76-woman since then . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson pauses as [he]_186-jameson tries to articulate [his]_186-jameson thoughts . “ [They]_3161-they always fell short . . . even [Claudia]_57-claudia . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile as hope blooms in [my]_2959-i chest . “ Recently [I]_2959-i ’d been thinking about [her]_76-woman a lot , and [I]_2959-i had even contacted [the airline]_{3162-the airline} and found out [her]_76-woman name . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_76-woman had ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . This is news . [He]_186-jameson nods . “ [I]_186-jameson got a photocopy of [your]_76-woman passport emailed to [me]_186-jameson just six weeks before [you]_76-woman started working for [us]_3163-us . [I]_186-jameson ’d planned on contacting [you]_76-woman , but with everything going on at work , [I]_186-jameson had n’t got around to it yet . [I]_186-jameson had no idea that [you]_76-woman were coming to work for [Miles Media]_{14-miles media} . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ That explains it , then . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smirk . “ Explains what ? ”_[2959-i] “ Why [you]_76-woman never called . [I]_186-jameson look like [a prisoner in that photo]_{3164-a prisoner in that photo} . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson chuckles . “ This is true . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson leans in and kisses [me]_2959-i softly . “ Tell [me]_186-jameson about [your]_76-woman past loves . ”_{[186-jameson]} [My]_2959-i eyes search [his]_186-jameson . “ [I]_186-jameson ca n’t . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson frowns . “ Since [I]_186-jameson met [you]_76-woman , [I]_186-jameson ’ve realized that [I]_186-jameson ’ve never been in love before . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson smiles softly . “ What about [the guy with [Backseat Barbie]_{66-backseat barbie}]_{3165-the guy with backseat barbie} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i giggle . “ [You]_76-woman remember [him]_{3165-the guy with backseat barbie} ? ”_[2959-i] “ Yes . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson smirks as [he]_186-jameson pulls [me]_2959-i over [his]_186-jameson body and holds [me]_2959-i tight . “ What [I]_186-jameson felt for them , [Jay]_108-jay , and what [I]_186-jameson feel for [you]_108-jay is incomparable . ”_{[186-jameson]} [We]_1670-we lie in silence for a while and stare up at the trees as [they]_1670-we sway over [us]_1670-we . “ [I]_2959-i love [you]_108-jay , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [He]_186-jameson kisses [my]_2959-i temple . “ Good , because [I]_186-jameson do n’t camp in hell for just [anyone]_272-anyone . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i giggle as [I]_2959-i hug [him]_186-jameson . [This man]_186-jameson kills [me]_2959-i . [Jameson]_186-jameson [We]_1670-we stare at the fire as it flickers . It sporadically cracks as the wood burns . [Emily]_186-jameson is in front of [me]_2959-i on [our]_1670-we makeshift bed on the floor . [We]_1670-we ’ve just made love and are in a sleepy , relaxed state . Home tomorrow . To be honest , [I]_2959-i could stay [here]_{385-new york} with [her]_186-jameson forever . [She]_186-jameson makes anywhere [home]_2289-home . [Emily]_186-jameson smiles up at [me]_2959-i . [Her]_186-jameson long dark hair is splayed across the pillow , and [her]_186-jameson big eyes offer [me]_2959-i a deep comfort . [My]_2959-i hand slides down over [her]_186-jameson full breast and lower over [her]_186-jameson stomach . [I]_2959-i turn [her]_186-jameson head and take [her]_186-jameson lips with [mine]_2959-i . [Our]_1670-we tongues dance in a slow erotic dance . [I]_2959-i ’m so in love with [this woman]_186-jameson . When [we]_1673-we ’re alone , nothing else matters . “ Thank [you]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [Her]_186-jameson eyes search [mine]_2959-i . “ For what ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ For finding [me]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [She]_186-jameson rolls toward [me]_2959-i and takes [my]_2959-i face in [her]_186-jameson hands . “ [We]_1673-we were always going to find each other , ”_{[186-jameson]} [she]_186-jameson whispers . “ [Soul mates]_{3167-soul mates} do that . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smirk as [I]_2959-i tuck a piece of [her]_186-jameson hair behind [her]_186-jameson ear . “ [You]_186-jameson do n’t really buy into [that soul mate]_{3167-soul mates} mumbo jumbo thing , do [you]_186-jameson ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_186-jameson did n’t . ”_{[186-jameson]} [She]_186-jameson kisses [me]_2959-i softly . “ Until [I]_186-jameson met [you]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [We]_1674-we stare at each other in the flickering light , and if [I]_2959-i could bottle this moment , [I]_2959-i would . Never have [I]_2959-i had something so raw and pure in [my]_2959-i life . [Her]_186-jameson love is a light . . . [my]_2959-i light . “ [Jay]_108-jay , ”_{[186-jameson]} [she]_186-jameson murmurs as [she]_186-jameson runs [her]_186-jameson fingers through [my]_2959-i stubble . [Her]_186-jameson eyes search [mine]_2959-i . “ Yeah , [baby]_108-jay ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Can [we]_3168-we come back here next weekend ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [she]_186-jameson asks hopefully . “ Really ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [She]_186-jameson nods with a soft smile . “ [I]_186-jameson love [this old house]_{3169-this old house} . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i smirk . If the truth be known , [I]_2959-i ’m kind of keen on it [myself]_2959-i . “ Maybe . ”_{[186-jameson]} [She]_186-jameson snuggles against [my]_2959-i chest . [I]_2959-i feel [her]_186-jameson relax in [my]_2959-i arms , and after a while , the gentle pattern of [her]_186-jameson breathing notifies [me]_2959-i that [she]_186-jameson ’s drifted off to sleep . [I]_2959-i inhale deeply into [her]_186-jameson hair and smile as [I]_2959-i watch the fire . This is it . [I]_2959-i can stop searching . [I]_2959-i ’ve found [her]_186-jameson . Chapter 20 Jameson [I]_2959-i walk into [the apartment]_{2627-the apartment} right at seven to the delectable aroma of gourmet food cooking . [I]_2959-i smile , drop [my]_2959-i laptop bag , and make [my]_2959-i way to [the kitchen]_{683-the kitchen} to find [Emily]_186-jameson dancing with [her]_186-jameson back to [me]_2959-i as [she]_186-jameson cooks . [I]_2959-i stand at the doorway and watch [her]_186-jameson for a moment . [She]_186-jameson ’s wearing a black skirt and a white shirt , [her]_186-jameson long dark hair is in a ponytail , and [her]_186-jameson naturally beautiful face is glowing . A warm feeling of comfort runs through [me]_2959-i at [her]_186-jameson obvious happiness . All is right in [my]_2959-i world when [she]_186-jameson ’s here . This is the weirdest thing [I]_2959-i ’ve ever experienced . [I]_2959-i do n’t want to be anywhere but here with [her]_186-jameson . From three o’clock every afternoon [I]_2959-i start to watch the clock , waiting for the time [I]_2959-i get to come [home]_2289-home . [I]_2959-i watch as [she]_186-jameson picks up [her]_186-jameson wineglass and sips it ; [her]_186-jameson burgundy lipstick marks the glass in a perfect lip shape , and [I]_2959-i smile — even [her]_186-jameson lipstick on the glass does things to [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i would never want to wash it again ; [I]_2959-i ’m like [a starstruck schoolboy]_{1678-a starstruck schoolboy} . [Her]_186-jameson behind moves sexily to the beat , and [I]_2959-i watch [her]_186-jameson , transfixed by [the beautiful woman in [[my]_2959-i kitchen]_{1679-my kitchen}]_186-jameson . [She]_186-jameson turns and catches sight of [me]_2959-i and smiles sexily . “ Hello . ”_{[186-jameson]} [She]_186-jameson comes to [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i wrap [her]_186-jameson in [my]_2959-i arms . “ How ’s [[my]_186-jameson man]_186-jameson ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [she]_186-jameson asks as [she]_186-jameson kisses [me]_2959-i softly . “ Good now that [I]_186-jameson ’m [home]_2289-home . ”_{[186-jameson]} [Our]_1680-we lips touch again and again , and [I]_2959-i sit [her]_186-jameson up on the counter and stand between [her]_186-jameson legs as [we]_1680-we kiss . “ Are [we]_1680-we having an entrée before [our]_1680-we meal , [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [she]_186-jameson breathes against [my]_2959-i lips . [I]_2959-i unzip [my]_2959-i fly . “ Looks like it . ”_[2959-i] It ’s Thursday and crazy around here . [We]_1680-we are preparing reports for [our]_1680-we board meetings tomorrow . It feels good to be back at it without the added pressure of all the other shit that ’s been going on around here . [Tristan]_2430-tristan and [I]_2959-i are at [my]_2959-i desk , discussing the new advertising budget [we]_1680-we have set , when there ’s a knock on [my]_2959-i door . “ Come in , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i call . The door opens , and a familiar face comes into view . [My]_2959-i face falls , and [I]_2959-i stand immediately . “ [Claudia]_57-claudia . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan ’s eyes widen , and [he]_2430-tristan looks to [me]_2959-i as [he]_2430-tristan stands . “ Hi , [Claud]_189-claud . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan rushes to [her]_1681-her and kisses [her]_1681-her on the cheek . “ How are [you]_189-claud ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} [he]_2430-tristan asks . [She]_1681-her forces a smile . “ Good , thank [you]_189-claud . . . and [you]_189-claud ? ”_[1681-her] “ Great . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan ’s eyes meet [mine]_2959-i across [the room]_{514-the room} . “ [I]_2430-tristan have some things to do . See [you]_189-claud later , [Claud]_189-claud . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ Goodbye . ”_[1681-her] [Her]_1681-her smile fades , and [her]_1681-her nervous eyes come to [me]_2959-i . “ Hello , [Jameson]_186-jameson . ”_[1681-her] “ Hello . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i walk around and kiss [her]_1681-her on the cheek ; [her]_1681-her familiar perfume permeates around [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i frown at the memories it evokes . “ How are [you]_189-claud ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . [She]_1681-her clutches [her]_1681-her purse . “ [I]_1681-her ’ve resigned from Vogue . [I]_1681-her ’m coming [home]_2289-home to [New York]_{385-new york} . ”_[1681-her] [I]_2959-i stare at [her]_1681-her , lost for words . “ [I]_1681-her ’ve missed [you]_189-claud too much , [Jameson]_186-jameson . [I]_1681-her ca n’t live without [you]_189-claud , ”_[1681-her] [she]_1681-her whispers . [My]_2959-i heart drops . “ [Claud]_189-claud , no . . . ”_[1681-her] [Her]_1681-her eyes fill with tears . “ [You]_189-claud said it was distance . ”_[1681-her] Empathy fills [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i ca n’t stand seeing [her]_1681-her upset , and [I]_2959-i take [her]_1681-her into [my]_2959-i arms . “ It ’s not the distance anymore , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i murmur into [her]_1681-her hair . The door opens , and [Emily]_186-jameson bounces in . [Her]_186-jameson face falls , and [she]_186-jameson stops on the spot when [she]_186-jameson sees [Claudia]_57-claudia in [my]_2959-i arms . “ Oh . . . [I]_186-jameson ’m — ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Come in , [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say . [Claudia]_57-claudia pulls out of [my]_2959-i arms , and [her]_186-jameson crazy eyes go to [Emily]_186-jameson . “ [Claudia]_57-claudia , this is [Emily]_186-jameson . . . [[my]_2959-i girlfriend]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i introduce [them]_1683-us . [Emily]_186-jameson ’s eyes flick between [us]_1683-us , and then [she]_186-jameson holds out [her]_186-jameson hand . “ Hello , [Claudia]_57-claudia . Nice to meet [you]_57-claudia . ”_{[186-jameson]} [She]_186-jameson smiles kindly . [Claudia]_57-claudia shakes [her]_186-jameson hand . “ Hello . ”_{[186-jameson]} [She]_186-jameson turns [her]_186-jameson attention back to [me]_2959-i . [Emily]_186-jameson looks between [us]_1683-us again . “ [I]_186-jameson ’ll give [you]_57-claudia some privacy . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Thank [you]_57-claudia , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper as [my]_2959-i eyes stay fixed firmly on [Claudia]_57-claudia . [I]_2959-i hate hurting [her]_186-jameson . “ Goodbye , ”_{[186-jameson]} [Emily]_186-jameson says . “ Nice to meet [you]_57-claudia . ”_{[186-jameson]} [Claudia]_57-claudia ’s eyes fill with tears anew as the door quietly clicks closed . “ Does [she]_186-jameson even know who [I]_186-jameson am ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [she]_186-jameson whispers . “ Yes . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ And [she]_186-jameson found [me]_186-jameson in [your]_57-claudia arms and is happy to leave [you]_57-claudia here with [me]_186-jameson ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [she]_186-jameson mutters sarcastically . [My]_2959-i eyes hold [hers]_186-jameson , annoyed that [she]_186-jameson thinks [Emily]_186-jameson has reason to be insecure . “ [She]_186-jameson knows where [my]_57-claudia heart lies . ”_[57-claudia] [Claudia]_57-claudia ’s eyes fill with tears , and [I]_2959-i internally kick [myself]_2959-i for being an ass . “ [I]_2959-i ’m coming [home]_2289-home to [New York]_{385-new york} , [Jameson]_186-jameson . [We]_3173-we can get back together . ”_[2959-i] “ No , [we]_3173-we ca n’t . ”_[57-claudia] [Her]_57-claudia eyes search [mine]_2959-i . “ [I]_57-claudia ’m marrying [her]_57-claudia , [Claud]_189-claud . ”_[57-claudia] “ Do n’t say that , ”_[57-claudia] [she]_57-claudia whispers . “ [She]_57-claudia ’s just easy for [you]_189-claud because [she]_57-claudia ’s no challenge . ”_[57-claudia] “ [You]_189-claud ’re wrong ; [she]_57-claudia ’s the love of [my]_57-claudia life . ”_[57-claudia] [She]_57-claudia clenches [her]_57-claudia jaw in anger . “ [[You]_189-claud bastard]_189-claud . ”_[57-claudia] “ [I]_2959-i ’m sorry . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i step back from [her]_57-claudia . “ But there ’s no other way to put it . ”_[57-claudia] [Her]_57-claudia anger erupts . “ So . . . what happens when [I]_57-claudia see [you]_189-claud out ? ”_[57-claudia] [she]_57-claudia snaps . “ [You]_189-claud say hello . ”_[57-claudia] “ Do [you]_189-claud think [you]_189-claud can replace [me]_57-claudia so easily ? ”_[57-claudia] [she]_57-claudia stammers . [I]_2959-i stare at [her]_57-claudia , sad that [she]_57-claudia ’s hurting . “ [I]_57-claudia love [you]_189-claud , [Jameson]_186-jameson . Come back to [me]_57-claudia , ”_[57-claudia] [she]_57-claudia pleads as [she]_57-claudia takes [my]_2959-i hand in [hers]_57-claudia . “ [You]_189-claud need to go , [Claud]_189-claud . ”_[57-claudia] “ [You]_189-claud ’re kicking [me]_57-claudia out ? ”_[57-claudia] [she]_57-claudia shrieks . “ No . [I]_57-claudia ’m asking [you]_189-claud to leave . ”_[57-claudia] “ That ’s the same thing . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i exhale heavily ; this is n’t going to end well . [I]_2959-i need to end it before an all - out war begins . [I]_2959-i kiss [her]_57-claudia on the forehead and walk to the door and open it . “ Goodbye , [Claudia]_57-claudia . ”_[57-claudia] [She]_57-claudia angrily swipes the tears from [her]_57-claudia eyes and storms past [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i close the door and stare at the carpet for a moment as [I]_2959-i feel the tectonic plates move another notch closer to goal . [I]_2959-i go back to [my]_2959-i desk and dial [Emily]_186-jameson ’s number . “ Hi , ”_[57-claudia] [she]_57-claudia answers . “ Hi . ”_[57-claudia] “ [I]_2959-i came up to see if [you]_2959-i wanted to go out to lunch today . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile softly . [I]_2959-i love [this woman]_57-claudia — not an inch of insecurity . “ [I]_186-jameson do . Meet [you]_2959-i in [the foyer]_{683-the kitchen} at one . ”_{[186-jameson]} [Emily]_186-jameson It ’s just around three in the afternoon . [I]_2959-i turn to [Aaron]_0-aaron . “ Wish [that damn cheesecake Uber]_{153-uber eats} would show up about now . ”_[2959-i] “ [Ha]_163-ha , right ? ”_[0-aaron] [he]_0-aaron mutters . “ [I]_0-aaron ’ll go make the coffees . ”_[0-aaron] [I]_2959-i stand and make [my]_2959-i way to [the kitchen]_{683-the kitchen} . [I]_2959-i make [Aaron]_0-aaron ’s and then [Molly]_198-molly ’s , and then as [I]_2959-i ’m making [mine]_2959-i , [Jake]_108-jay walks into [the kitchen]_{683-the kitchen} . “ Hi , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_[108-jay] “ Oh , hi . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stir the coffee . “ Holy shit , get ready for a media storm tomorrow . ”_[2959-i] “ Why ? ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron looks around and leans in as if not wanting [anyone]_272-anyone to hear what [he]_0-aaron has to say . “ [You]_3174-you should see what [Ferrara]_2430-tristan is putting to print tomorrow . ”_[0-aaron] “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ [You]_3174-you ca n’t tell [anyone]_272-anyone , ”_[0-aaron] [he]_0-aaron whispers . “ [I]_0-aaron would n’t . ”_[0-aaron] “ [They]_3175-they have new dirt on [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson . The shit is about to hit the fan . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes widen . “ What ? How do [you]_3174-you know ? ”_[2959-i] “ [Our]_1688-our insider in [[their]_3175-they office]_{3176-their office} has just called it through . ”_[0-aaron] “ What is it ? ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron looks around . “ Apparently — ”_{[433-someone else]} [Someone else]_{433-someone else} walks into [the kitchen]_{683-the kitchen} , and [we]_1688-our both step back from each other guiltily . [The guy]_{2476-the guy} begins to make idle chitchat with [Jake]_108-jay , and if [I]_2959-i wait around , it will be too obvious that [I]_2959-i am waiting to talk to [him]_108-jay alone . Shit , [I]_2959-i ’ll come back in a minute . [I]_2959-i make [my]_2959-i way back to [my]_2959-i desk with [my]_2959-i heart in [my]_2959-i throat . What dirt do [they]_1690-they have on [Jay]_108-jay ? Oh hell , [I]_2959-i need to find out what it is . [I]_2959-i keep an eye on [the kitchen]_{683-the kitchen} , and as soon as [I]_2959-i see [Jake]_108-jay go back to [his]_108-jay desk , [I]_2959-i make [my]_2959-i way over to [him]_108-jay , and [his]_108-jay eyes light up when [he]_108-jay sees [me]_2959-i . “ Hi . ”_[108-jay] “ Meet [me]_2959-i in [the photocopy room]_{3177-the photocopy room} , please ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ Sure . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i walk in and wait , and moments later [he]_108-jay follows [me]_2959-i in . “ What the hell is going on ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ [I]_108-jay ca n’t tell [you]_108-jay [here]_{385-new york} ; it ’s too risky , ”_[108-jay] [he]_108-jay says as [he]_108-jay looks around . “ Just tell [me]_2959-i , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i almost beg . “ Meet [me]_2959-i after work , and [I]_2959-i ’ll tell [you]_108-jay everything over a quick drink . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_108-jay . “ What time ? ”_[2959-i] “ Six thirty ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i think for a moment . That would still give [me]_2959-i time to go to [Tristan]_2430-tristan if [I]_2959-i need to . “ Just tell [me]_2959-i now . ”_[2959-i] “ No way . [I]_2959-i ’ll tell [you]_108-jay it all tonight ; it ’s too in depth . ”_[2959-i] Damn it , [I]_2959-i do n’t want to meet [this idiot]_2430-tristan , but if [I]_2959-i do n’t , how would [I]_2959-i know what [Ferrara]_2430-tristan is up to ? If [I]_2959-i find out , then maybe [we]_1691-we can get an injunction and stop the story from going to print . “ Okay , fine . Where ? ”_[1691-we] “ [Harry]_212-harry ’s Bar , six thirty . ”_[1691-we] “ Okay , see [you]_108-jay there . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i go back to [my]_2959-i desk and look around guiltily . [My]_2959-i heart rate is going through the roof . What dirt do [they]_1692-they have on [Jameson]_186-jameson ? Oh no , [[my]_2959-i poor man]_2430-tristan . [Molly]_198-molly and [Aaron]_0-aaron are both not at [their]_1692-they desks , and [I]_2959-i know [I]_2959-i have to ring [Jay]_108-jay and let [him]_108-jay know [I]_2959-i ’m going to be late when [they]_1692-they ca n’t hear [me]_2959-i lie and use them as [my]_2959-i alibi . [I]_2959-i nervously dial [his]_108-jay number . “ Hi , ”_[108-jay] [his]_108-jay sexy voice purrs down the phone . “ Hi . ”_[108-jay] [I]_2959-i begin to break into a sweat as [I]_2959-i prepare to lie . “ [I]_2959-i ’m going to go out to dinner with [Molly]_198-molly and [Aaron]_0-aaron tonight . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i screw up [my]_2959-i face . “ [Aaron]_0-aaron is a bit down , and [we]_3179-we ’re going to try and cheer [him]_108-jay up . ”_[2959-i] “ Oh . ”_[108-jay] [He]_108-jay seems surprised . “ Is that okay ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reply nervously . “ Of course it is . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i ’ll come over as soon as [I]_2959-i finish , and it wo n’t be late . ”_[2959-i] “ Okay , [babe]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] “ What will [you]_2959-i eat ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . [I]_2959-i hate that [I]_2959-i wo n’t be cooking for [him]_108-jay . Looking after [Jameson]_186-jameson has become [my]_2959-i favorite thing . “ [I]_186-jameson ’ll find something ; do n’t worry about [me]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Oh , okay . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i fall silent , feeling guilty . As if sensing [my]_2959-i inner turmoil , [he]_108-jay asks , “ Is everything all right , [Emily]_186-jameson ? ”_[108-jay] “ Yes , of course . [I]_2959-i love [you]_186-jameson . See [you]_186-jameson tonight . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i hang up in a rush before [I]_2959-i confess [my]_2959-i lie . Six thirty on the dot [I]_2959-i walk into [Harry ’s Bar]_{37-harry ’s bar} . [I]_2959-i ’ve been here before with [Aaron]_0-aaron and [Molly]_198-molly , so [I]_2959-i know where it is . [Jake]_108-jay is in [the back corner]_{1693-the back corner} , and [he]_108-jay waves happily when [he]_108-jay sees [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i smile awkwardly and make [my]_2959-i way over to the table . A glass of wine sits there waiting for [me]_2959-i . “ Hi . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sit down opposite [him]_108-jay . “ Hi . [You]_108-jay look beautiful . ”_[108-jay] [He]_108-jay smiles as [he]_108-jay looks [me]_2959-i up and down . [I]_2959-i frown . [I]_2959-i went [home]_2289-home and showered and changed quickly . [I]_2959-i hope [he]_108-jay does n’t think it was for [him]_108-jay . [I]_2959-i changed for [Jay]_108-jay for when [I]_2959-i see [him]_108-jay later . “ [You]_108-jay ordered [me]_2959-i a drink ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ Yes . ”_[108-jay] [He]_108-jay smiles warmly . “ [I]_108-jay hope [you]_108-jay like it — cab sav . ”_[108-jay] “ Thanks . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sip it . “ What ’s the story about [Jameson]_186-jameson ? ”_[108-jay] [He]_108-jay opens the menu . “ Should [we]_3180-we get something to eat ? ”_[108-jay] “ [I]_2959-i ’m really not hungry , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reply . [I]_2959-i just want to get the information and get the hell out of here . [He]_108-jay keeps reading the menu . “ [I]_108-jay might get some wedges . ”_[108-jay] “ Tell [me]_2959-i what [you]_2959-i know , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask again . “ Well , it ’s a tangled web . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i wine as [I]_2959-i watch [him]_108-jay . [I]_2959-i ’m so nervous about what [he]_108-jay ’s about to tell [me]_2959-i that [I]_2959-i feel sick . “ Apparently there is a huge story coming out tomorrow . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i wine . “ About ? ”_[2959-i] “ Well . . . ”_[108-jay] [He]_108-jay pauses . “ [I]_108-jay think [I]_108-jay ’m going to get the wedges ; do [you]_2959-i want wedges ? ”_[108-jay] “ Fine , get the wedges , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . [He]_108-jay keeps looking at the menu , and [I]_2959-i ’m about to explode . Pick some food , [you]_2959-i damn fool . “ [I]_2959-i ’ll get the wedges , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say as [I]_2959-i stand in a rush . “ Is that it ? Is that all [you]_2959-i want ? ”_[2959-i] “ Uh - huh . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i march to the counter . “ Can [I]_2959-i have a bowl of wedges and a trio of dipping sauces , please ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i exhale heavily as [I]_2959-i try to calm [myself]_2959-i down . Just be calm . “ [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i hear a voice behind [me]_2959-i . “ Is that all ? ”_{[717-the waiter]} [the waiter]_{717-the waiter} asks [me]_2959-i . “ Yes , please . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile as [I]_2959-i turn back toward the voice that just called [me]_2959-i . [Jake]_108-jay grabs [my]_2959-i hand and kisses [me]_2959-i on the lips . [I]_2959-i step back , shocked . “ What are [you]_108-jay doing ? ”_[2959-i] “ Kissing [you]_108-jay . ”_[108-jay] [He]_108-jay smiles as [he]_108-jay leans in to kiss [me]_2959-i again . [I]_2959-i jump back and out of [his]_108-jay reach . “ What the hell , [Jake]_108-jay ? [I]_2959-i do n’t like [you]_108-jay like that , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap as [I]_2959-i wipe [my]_2959-i mouth . “ [I]_2959-i thought that since [we]_3181-we were on a date . . . ”_[2959-i] “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer , horrified . “ [I]_108-jay came here to find out about [Jameson]_186-jameson . ”_[108-jay] [He]_108-jay smiles a broad , cheeky smile and then winks . [I]_2959-i glare at [him]_108-jay . “ There ’s no breaking story , is there ? ”_[108-jay] [He]_108-jay shrugs . “ [We]_3181-we could make the story about the wild night [we]_3181-we spend together . ”_[108-jay] “ [You]_108-jay ’re [a fucking idiot]_108-jay , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . “ [I]_2959-i am not interested in [you]_108-jay . ”_[2959-i] “ Oh , but [you]_108-jay should be . ”_[108-jay] [He]_108-jay grabs [my]_2959-i hand again , and [I]_2959-i push [him]_108-jay hard in the chest . “ Stop it . ”_[108-jay] “ That will be twenty - two dollars , ”_{[1696-the poor waiter]} [the poor waiter]_{1696-the poor waiter} says as [he]_108-jay looks between [us]_1697-us . “ [I]_2959-i ’m not paying for this imbecile ’s wedges , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . “ Goodbye , [Jake]_108-jay , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say as [I]_2959-i storm toward the door . “ [Emily]_186-jameson . . . come on . [We]_1697-us would be great together , ”_[108-jay] [he]_108-jay calls . [I]_2959-i stumble out of [the bar]_{459-the bar} , furious , as steam shoots from [my]_2959-i ears . [I]_2959-i ’ve been stressed out all day , and for what ? Stupid [Jake]_108-jay ’s lie to get [me]_2959-i on [my]_2959-i own . [The guy]_{2476-the guy} ’s a fucking sleazebag . And now [I]_2959-i ca n’t even go [home]_2289-home because [I]_2959-i lied to [Jay]_108-jay about where [I]_2959-i am . [I]_2959-i walk into [a Thai restaurant]_{1701-a thai restaurant} , and [the waiter]_{717-the waiter} approaches [me]_2959-i . “ Can [I]_{717-the waiter} have a table for one , please ? ”_{[717-the waiter]} [I]_2959-i ask sadly . [I]_2959-i ’ll just eat dinner alone and then go [home]_2289-home to [[my]_2959-i man]_{2829-my man} . [I]_2959-i ca n’t believe [I]_2959-i fell for that trick . What [an asshole]_{662-an asshole} . At least there ’s no story . [Jameson]_186-jameson [I]_2959-i bend and kiss [Emily]_186-jameson on the forehead in the dark . [She]_186-jameson ’s still sleeping . “ [I]_186-jameson ’m going , [babe]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Hmm . ”_{[186-jameson]} [She]_186-jameson wraps [her]_186-jameson arms around [me]_2959-i and pulls [me]_2959-i down on top of [her]_186-jameson . “ No , do n’t go . Play hooky today . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i smile in [her]_186-jameson arms . “ [I]_2959-i ca n’t ; [I]_2959-i have a meeting this morning . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sigh . [I]_2959-i have so much damage control to do . Even though the immediate story - leak threat has come to an end , this battle with [Ferrara]_2430-tristan is nowhere near over . If anything , [I]_2959-i feel it ’s about to come to a head . “ Two days until [we]_1705-we go away , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i remind [her]_186-jameson . [She]_186-jameson smiles with [her]_186-jameson eyes closed . “ Two days is too long , [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} . One of these days [I]_186-jameson ’m going to kidnap [you]_{79-mr. miles} . ”_{[186-jameson]} [We]_1705-we kiss softly , again and again , and [I]_2959-i can feel [my]_2959-i arousal grow between [my]_2959-i legs . [I]_2959-i pull back from [her]_186-jameson . “ [I]_2959-i ’ve got to go , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper into [her]_186-jameson hair . “ If [I]_2959-i stay here , [I]_2959-i ’m going to fuck [you]_2959-i and be late . ”_[2959-i] “ Good . ”_{[186-jameson]} [She]_186-jameson smirks . “ Fuck [me]_2959-i and be late . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i chuckle against [her]_186-jameson lips , and with one long , last , lingering kiss , [I]_2959-i get up and stare at [her]_186-jameson lying in [my]_2959-i bed , which is all messed up . [She]_186-jameson smiles up at [me]_2959-i , and [my]_2959-i heart constricts . Nothing has ever looked so perfect . . . or felt so right . Even with all this shit going on , [Emily]_186-jameson instills in [me]_2959-i a sense of calm , as if the whole world is still all right because [we]_1706-we have each other . “ [I]_186-jameson love [you]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [I]_186-jameson love [you]_186-jameson more . ”_{[186-jameson]} [She]_186-jameson smiles as [she]_186-jameson sits up and makes a last - minute attempt to drag [me]_2959-i back to bed . It ’s so fucking hard to leave when [she]_186-jameson ’s like this . [I]_2959-i make [my]_2959-i way [downstairs]_{2454-downstairs} and see [[my]_2959-i trusty friend]_{1708-my trusty friend} [Alan]_246-alan standing beside [the car]_{369-the car} . “ Morning . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . [He]_{1708-my trusty friend} gives [me]_2959-i a sad smile , and [I]_2959-i frown . “ Everything all right ? ”_{[1708-my trusty friend]} [He]_{1708-my trusty friend} opens the door of [the limo]_{678-the limo} , and [Tristan]_2430-tristan , [Christopher]_{141-christopher} , and [Elliot]_140-elliot are in the back , waiting for [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i frown . “ Hi . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes flick to [Alan]_246-alan in question . “ What ’s going on ? ”_[2959-i] “ Get in . ”_[140-elliot] [Elliot]_140-elliot sighs . [I]_2959-i glance between [them]_1711-them ; [their]_1711-them faces are solemn , and [I]_2959-i know something has happened . “ Is [dad]_246-alan all right ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ [Dad]_196-dad ’s fine . ”_[2959-i] “ [Mom]_70-mom ? ”_[2959-i] “ [She]_70-mom ’s great . Get in . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i get in and close the door , and [the limo]_{678-the limo} pulls out into [the traffic]_{709-the traffic} . “ [I]_2430-tristan want [you]_70-mom to know that [we]_3182-we do n’t believe anything about this , and [we]_3182-we are simply here for [you]_70-mom , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan says . “ What ’s going on ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap as agitation washes over [me]_2959-i . [Elliot]_140-elliot hands [me]_2959-i the paper . [I]_2959-i stare at it for a moment , and it takes a few seconds for [my]_2959-i brain to process what [I]_2959-i ’m seeing . The front page of [the Gazette]_{596-the gazette} is a huge image of [Emily]_186-jameson kissing [Jake]_108-jay [the investigator]_108-jay . [She]_186-jameson ’s holding [his]_108-jay hand and smiling as [his]_108-jay lips press to [hers]_186-jameson . It looks as though it ’s in [a restaurant]_{760-a restaurant} or something . [I]_2959-i frown as [my]_2959-i chest tightens . “ What the fuck is this ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap angrily as [I]_2959-i flick the paper . [I]_2959-i scan the story . [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson — [Media Guru]_{213-media guru} ’s Fall from [Grace]_214-grace In what appears to be the final nail in [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson ’s media coffin , [his]_186-jameson fiancée , [Emily Foster]_186-jameson , has been having a secret affair . [The two]_{1715-the two} have been spotted in [various locations]_{1716-various locations} and were snapped holidaying in [Italy]_38-italy two months ago . Leaked bank statements released today prove that [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson has been embezzling money and transferring it to an offshore account . [The board]_{1717-the board} is expected to fire [him]_186-jameson as [CEO of]_186-jameson [Miles Media]_{68-miles media} today , and criminal charges will be laid . Looks like [Emily Foster]_186-jameson jumped [ship]_1718-ship just in time . Chapter 21 [I]_2959-i look up to [[my]_2959-i brothers]_{2616-my brothers} , speechless . [I]_2959-i stare back down at the photo of [Emily]_186-jameson . [She]_186-jameson ’s wearing [her]_186-jameson yellow dress . . . the same one [she]_186-jameson was wearing yesterday . [My]_2959-i eyebrows rise by [themselves]_{2616-my brothers} as [I]_2959-i try to make sense of this . “ When was this taken ? ”_[2959-i] “ No idea , but it had to be lately . [She]_186-jameson has the bracelet on that [you]_186-jameson bought [her]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i glance down to [her]_186-jameson arm , and sure enough , the diamond - and - gold bracelet is on [her]_186-jameson arm . Can it be ? [I]_2959-i frown — a clusterfuck of questions . . . not [[my]_2959-i Emily]_186-jameson , no . “ [We]_3183-we know it ’s not [you]_186-jameson , ”_[140-elliot] [Elliot]_140-elliot says . “ [You]_186-jameson ’ve been hacked ; [we]_3183-we will prove it . [I]_140-elliot promise [you]_186-jameson . ”_[140-elliot] “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown , unable to string a sentence together . [I]_2959-i drag [my]_2959-i eyes up to [[my]_2959-i brothers]_{2616-my brothers} in confusion . “ There ’ve been transfers , [Jameson]_186-jameson . Millions of dollars have left [our]_3183-we bank accounts with [your]_186-jameson password , ”_{[141-christopher]} [Christopher]_{141-christopher} says solemnly . [I]_2959-i narrow [my]_2959-i eyes . “ What are [you]_186-jameson talking about ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t understand . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i glance back down at the image . “ When was this photo taken ? ”_[2959-i] “ This is a setup ; [I]_2430-tristan ’m sure of it , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan snaps . “ [Emily]_186-jameson would n’t do this . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown , unable to believe what [I]_2959-i ’m hearing . [I]_2959-i run [my]_2959-i two hands through [my]_2959-i hair as [I]_2959-i begin to perspire ; adrenaline rushes through [my]_2959-i bloodstream . “ That ’s bullshit , and [you]_2959-i know it , ”_[140-elliot] [Elliot]_140-elliot snaps . “ The timing of this image going to print is no coincidence . ”_[140-elliot] [I]_2959-i frown as [my]_2959-i eyes come to [Elliot]_140-elliot . “ Has [Emily]_186-jameson been in [[your]_2959-i apartment]_{2745-your apartment} alone ? ”_[140-elliot] [he]_140-elliot asks . [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_140-elliot , [my]_2959-i mind a clusterfuck of confusion . “ Has [she]_186-jameson had access to [your]_2959-i computers , [Jameson]_186-jameson ? ”_{[141-christopher]} [Christopher]_{141-christopher} snaps . [I]_2959-i screw [my]_2959-i face up . “ Yes . . . but . . . ”_[2959-i] [They]_1721-they all sit back in [their]_1721-they seats as if collectively coming to a conclusion . [I]_2959-i look between [them]_1721-they . “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ [I]_2959-i think [Emily]_186-jameson ’s working with [Gabriel Ferrara]_2430-tristan . It ’s all a little bit too coincidental , if [you]_2430-tristan ask [me]_2959-i . [She]_186-jameson ’s been sent in to keep [you]_2430-tristan occupied while [he]_140-elliot planned [your]_2430-tristan demise . ”_[2959-i] “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . “ That ’s preposterous . ”_[2959-i] “ Yes , it is , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan agrees . “ Fucking ridiculous . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ Think about it , ”_[140-elliot] [Elliot]_140-elliot snaps . “ [She]_186-jameson conveniently shows up here and , within weeks , has [you]_2430-tristan by the balls . ”_[140-elliot] “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i screw up [my]_2959-i face . “ Fucking bullshit . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reread the story as fury rages inside of [me]_2959-i like never before . [Elliot]_140-elliot hits the paper with the back of [his]_140-elliot hand . “ What ’s this fucking photo , then ? ”_[140-elliot] “ A setup , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan snaps . [I]_2959-i stare at the image ; [she]_1722-she ’s holding [Jake]_108-jay ’s hand and smiling as [he]_108-jay kisses [her]_1722-she . . . it looks like [she]_1722-she ’s happy to be there . [My]_2959-i eyes flick to [Tristan]_2430-tristan in question . [I]_2959-i have no idea what to think . . . what the actual fuck is going on here ? “ [I]_2430-tristan ’m telling [you]_2430-tristan , [man]_2430-tristan , it ’s a camera angle ; [you]_2430-tristan know better than [anyone that the right angle]_{3185-anyone that the right angle} can tell a completely different story , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan says . “ Bullshit . Where there ’s smoke there ’s always fire , ”_[140-elliot] [Elliot]_140-elliot growls . “ Nevertheless , [Emily Foster]_186-jameson is fucking irrelevant right now . Deal with [her]_186-jameson later . [You]_2430-tristan ’re being accused of embezzlement . [You]_2430-tristan could go to [jail]_1119-jail , [Jameson]_186-jameson . ”_[140-elliot] [I]_2959-i run both of [my]_2959-i hands through [my]_2959-i hair as [I]_2959-i bring [my]_2959-i focus back to the facts . [I]_2959-i feel a surge of adrenaline rush throughout [my]_2959-i body as [my]_2959-i skin prickles . “ What ’s happened ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . [I]_2959-i can hear [my]_2959-i angry heartbeat in [my]_2959-i ears . “ [We]_3187-we ’re not sure . Huge bank transfers have been coming out of the accounts , and [nobody]_2321-nobody noticed , ”_{[141-christopher]} [Christopher]_{141-christopher} replies . “ Going to where ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ An offshore account . ”_[2959-i] “ How the fuck am [I]_2959-i implicated in all of this ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i glance back down at the image of [Emily]_186-jameson kissing [Jake]_108-jay , and [I]_2959-i want to kill [somebody]_251-somebody . . . [Gabriel Ferrara]_2430-tristan . “ [I]_2430-tristan do n’t understand . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [I]_2959-i drag [my]_2959-i eyes to [[my]_2959-i brother]_{1724-my brother} to try and focus on the facts . “ It ’s coming up that the transfers were made from [your]_2430-tristan log - in details . ”_[2959-i] “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i screw up [my]_2959-i face in question . “ That ’s impossible ; [I]_2959-i have n’t been into [our]_3189-us business accounts for months . [I]_2959-i have no reason to . ”_[2959-i] “ That ’s what [I]_2430-tristan said , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan snaps . “ [I]_2430-tristan handle the money side of things ; [you]_2430-tristan all know that . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ [We]_3189-us have the accounts and legal team meeting [us]_3189-us at [the office]_{385-new york} at eight , ”_[140-elliot] [Elliot]_140-elliot replies . [My]_2959-i eyes flick to [him]_140-elliot . “ Does [Dad]_196-dad know ? ”_[2959-i] “ Yeah . ”_[140-elliot] [He]_140-elliot exhales heavily . “ [He]_140-elliot ’s meeting [us]_3189-us there . ”_[140-elliot] [I]_2959-i clench [my]_2959-i jaw and stare out the window as [we]_1725-we fly through [the streets of [New York]_{385-new york}]_{1726-the streets of new york} . Anger , confusion , and betrayal are all that [I]_2959-i see . [I]_2959-i drag [my]_2959-i hand down [my]_2959-i face and inhale deeply as [I]_2959-i try to slow [my]_2959-i heart rate down . [I]_2959-i feel crazier than ever before . [My]_2959-i reputation . . . [my]_2959-i business . [[My]_2959-i girl]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i stare out the window , and moments later [we]_1725-we arrive at [the Miles Media building]_{521-the miles media building} . It ’s just 7:20 a.m. , and [we]_1725-we make [our]_1725-we way to the top floor . [I]_2959-i need to be alone before the craziness begins . [I]_2959-i walk into [[my]_2959-i office]_{514-the room} , shut the door , and drop into [my]_2959-i chair at [my]_2959-i desk . [The room]_{514-the room} is silent . . . and empty . Through [my]_2959-i windows [I]_2959-i can see bustling [New York]_{385-new york} below as [the city]_{385-new york} prepares for the day . Everything down there seems so normal . . . so in order . [My]_2959-i temper is simmering like a volcano and dangerously close to exploding . [I]_2959-i do n’t know if [I]_2959-i ’m going to smash something or burst into tears . Either way , [I]_2959-i feel completely unstable . With [my]_2959-i elbows on the desk , [I]_2959-i drop [my]_2959-i head into [my]_2959-i hands ; [my]_2959-i breath quivers on the intake as [I]_2959-i try to calm [myself]_2959-i down . [She]_1730-she told [me]_2959-i [she]_1730-she was going out with [Molly]_198-molly and [Aaron]_0-aaron last night . [I]_2959-i go over the conversation [we]_1731-we had when [she]_1730-she got [home]_2289-home . “ How were [[your]_198-molly friends]_{3191-your friends} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i asked . “ Great . . . it was good to see [them]_{3191-your friends} , ”_[1730-she] [she]_1730-she replied . [She]_1730-she lied . [I]_2959-i was at [home]_2289-home missing [her]_1730-she . . . and [she]_1730-she was out with [another man]_{526-another man} . [I]_2959-i get a lump in [my]_2959-i throat as reality sets in . [I]_2959-i ’ve been over here falling madly in love with [her]_1730-she . . . while [she]_1730-she ’s been seeing [someone else]_{433-someone else} . The door clicks , and [I]_2959-i close [my]_2959-i eyes to try and block out [Tristan]_2430-tristan — [I]_2959-i know it ’s [him]_2430-tristan . [He]_2430-tristan knows [me]_2959-i better than [anyone]_272-anyone . [I]_2959-i hear [him]_2430-tristan go to [the bar]_{459-the bar} and drop ice into two glasses , then the comforting sound of scotch being poured . [He]_2430-tristan places one in front of [me]_2959-i , and [my]_2959-i heavy eyes rise to meet [his]_2430-tristan . [He]_2430-tristan clinks [his]_2430-tristan glass with [mine]_2959-i as it sits in [my]_2959-i hand . “ Well , this day fucking sucks already . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan leans on [my]_2959-i desk with [his]_2430-tristan behind . “ [You]_2430-tristan think ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} [I]_2959-i mutter as [I]_2959-i take a sip . [I]_2959-i feel the burn as it glides down [my]_2959-i throat . “ When was the photo taken ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} [he]_2430-tristan asks . “ Last night . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan frowns . [I]_2959-i clench [my]_2959-i jaw as [I]_2959-i stare out the window , ashamed that [the woman [I]_2959-i love]_{1737-the woman i love} does n’t love [me]_2959-i back . “ [She]_{1737-the woman i love} said [she]_{1737-the woman i love} was out with [Molly]_198-molly and [Aaron]_0-aaron . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan sips [his]_2430-tristan scotch and raises [his]_2430-tristan eyebrows as if surprised that [she]_{1737-the woman i love} lied . “ [I]_2959-i thought [she]_{1737-the woman i love} was the one . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown , [my]_2959-i chest constricting once more . “ That makes [two of [us]_1738-us]_{3192-two of us} . ”_[2959-i] Silence hangs between [us]_1738-us . “ Let ’s just get through this day and prove [your]_2959-i innocence . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan sighs as [he]_2430-tristan drains [his]_2430-tristan glass . [I]_2959-i nod . [He]_2430-tristan watches [me]_2959-i for a moment , and eventually [he]_2430-tristan asks , “ [You]_2959-i okay ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} [I]_2959-i nod once , unable to push the lie past [my]_2959-i lips . “ [We]_1738-us will prove that [you]_2959-i ’re innocent , [Jay]_108-jay . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan puts [his]_2430-tristan reassuring hand on [my]_2959-i shoulder . “ [I]_2959-i promise [you]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i drain [my]_2959-i glass and go to [the bar]_{459-the bar} for a refill . [He]_2430-tristan watches [me]_2959-i once more , and [I]_2959-i know [he]_2430-tristan ’s choosing [his]_2430-tristan words wisely . “ Tell [me]_2959-i that [you]_2959-i ’re all right . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i lips , and [my]_2959-i eyes rise to [his]_2430-tristan . “ [I]_2959-i ’m all right . ”_[2959-i] “ Why do [I]_2959-i get the feeling that [you]_2959-i ’re about to lose [your]_2959-i shit and kill [someone]_2326-someone ? ”_[2959-i] “ If [you]_2959-i want to save a life today , get rid of [Jake Peters]_108-jay . ”_[2959-i] “ It ’s already done . [I]_2959-i called and fired [him]_108-jay this morning at five a.m. , as soon as [I]_2959-i saw the story . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i take a sip of the amber fluid ; it heats [my]_2959-i throat as it goes down . [He]_2430-tristan pauses before [he]_2430-tristan asks , “ Do [you]_2959-i want [me]_2430-tristan to fire [Emily]_186-jameson ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} [I]_2959-i stare out the window and over [the city]_{2-the city} . “ No . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2430-tristan was thinking . . . , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [he]_2430-tristan continues . “ Get out , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i bark . “ But — ”_[2959-i] “ Now . ”_[2959-i] The door clicks quietly behind [him]_2430-tristan , and [I]_2959-i stand and move to the window and stare out over [the city]_{2-the city} . Adrenaline surges through [my]_2959-i body , and [I]_2959-i feel [the earth]_{1741-the earth} ’s tectonic plates move beneath [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i scotch as a cold , detached determination takes its place in [my]_2959-i soul . [Nobody]_2321-nobody fucks with [me]_2959-i like this and gets away with it . Get ready to meet [[your]_1743-your maker]_{1744-your maker} , [Mr. Ferrara]_2430-tristan . [Your]_1743-your day is near . [Emily]_186-jameson [I]_2959-i bounce out to [the waiting limo]_{1745-the waiting limo} and see [trusty Alan]_246-alan standing beside [it]_{1745-the waiting limo} . [He]_246-alan opens the door . “ Good morning , [Alan]_246-alan . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan nods . “ Morning . ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i frown and get in . [He]_246-alan ’s not in a very good mood today . The door closes behind [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i look around for the paper . Hmm . . . [Jameson]_186-jameson must have taken it with [him]_246-alan this morning . [I]_2959-i ’m still sleepy and lethargic . There ’s a lot to be said for morning exercise — it definitely wakes [you]_{1744-your maker} up for the day . [I]_2959-i put [my]_2959-i head back and close [my]_2959-i eyes as [we]_1746-we roll through the traffic . What feels like ten minutes later , [the car]_{369-the car} comes to a halt and switches off . [I]_2959-i glance up . [We]_1746-we are out in front of [[my]_2959-i apartment building]_{1748-my apartment building} . Huh ? [Alan]_246-alan opens the door . “ What are [you]_246-alan doing ? ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i ask . “ [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} instructed [me]_246-alan to drop [you]_246-alan here this morning . ”_[246-alan] “ What . . . why ? ”_[246-alan] “ [He]_{79-mr. miles} suggested that [you]_246-alan have the day off . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan gestures with [his]_246-alan hand for [me]_2959-i to get out of [the car]_{369-the car} . “ Huh ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ What ’s going on , [Alan]_246-alan ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i ’m not sure , but [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} said that [he]_{79-mr. miles} did n’t want [you]_246-alan to come into [the office]_{385-new york} and that [he]_{79-mr. miles} will be in touch . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i screw up [my]_2959-i face . “ Be in touch — what does that mean ? Why ca n’t [I]_2959-i go to [the office]_{385-new york} ? [I]_2959-i ’m confused . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_246-alan need to get out of [the car]_{369-the car} , [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan asserts . “ What ? ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan gestures again with [his]_246-alan hand , and [I]_2959-i get out in a huff . “ Has something happened ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer as [I]_2959-i brush past [him]_246-alan . “ Is [Jameson]_186-jameson all right ? ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_246-alan need to speak to [him]_246-alan , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] “ Fine , [I]_2959-i will , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap as [I]_2959-i take out [my]_2959-i phone and dial [his]_246-alan number . “ Goodbye , [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_[246-alan] [Alan]_246-alan says before getting into [the limo]_{678-the limo} and quickly pulling out . [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s phone rings out . [I]_2959-i call again . . . it goes straight to voice mail . [He]_186-jameson ’s switched it off . “ What the fuck ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i whisper , annoyed . [I]_2959-i go to call [Sammia]_246-alan , [[his]_186-jameson PA]_{2994-his pa} , but then realize that it ’s only eight o’clock — [she]_1751-she is n’t even at work yet . What the hell is going on ? [I]_2959-i cross [the street]_{550-the street} and half walk , half run to [the corner paper stall]_{1753-the corner paper stall} . [I]_2959-i see the front page of [the Gazette]_{596-the gazette} , and the blood drains from [my]_2959-i face as [I]_2959-i see a half - page picture of [Jake]_108-jay and [me]_2959-i kissing . “ Dear God , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [I]_2959-i read the story . [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson — [Media Guru]_{213-media guru} ’s Fall from [Grace]_214-grace In what appears to be the final nail in [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson ’s media coffin , [his]_186-jameson fiancée , [Emily Foster]_186-jameson , has been having a secret affair . [The two]_{1715-the two} have been spotted in various locations and were snapped holidaying in [Italy]_38-italy two months ago . Leaked bank statements released today prove that [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson has been embezzling money and transferring it to an offshore account . [The board]_{1717-the board} is expected to fire [him]_186-jameson as CEO of [Miles Media]_{68-miles media} today , and criminal charges will be laid . Looks like [Emily Foster]_186-jameson jumped [ship]_1718-ship just in time . What ? [My]_2959-i hand goes over [my]_2959-i mouth in horror . Oh [[my]_2959-i God]_{2363-my god} , poor [Jameson]_186-jameson . “ [I]_2959-i ’m not [his]_186-jameson fiancée , [[you]_2959-i fucking idiots]_{3196-you fucking idiots} , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sneer . “ How many things can [you]_2959-i possibly fuck up in one story ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i turn and begin to storm back to [[my]_2959-i apartment]_{766-my apartment} as [I]_2959-i redial [his]_186-jameson number with a sense of urgency . “ Hey , ”_{[186-jameson]} [the paper man]_186-jameson calls out to [me]_2959-i . “ [You]_2959-i did n’t pay for that . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Oh , [I]_2959-i ’m sorry , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i apologize as [I]_2959-i rush back to pay . “ [I]_186-jameson was distracted . Thank [you]_2959-i . ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s phone goes straight to voice mail once more . What do [I]_2959-i do ? What do [I]_2959-i do ? [My]_2959-i shoulder slams into [a man]_{2300-a man} as [he]_{2300-a man} walks past . “ Hey , watch where [you]_2959-i ’re going , ”_{[2300-a man]} [he]_{2300-a man} calls . “ Sorry , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer . [I]_2959-i dial [Tristan]_2430-tristan ’s number . “ Hi , [Em]_3197-em . ”_[2959-i] “ [Tristan]_2430-tristan , what the hell is going on ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i cry . “ [We]_3198-we ’re in meetings ; [I]_2959-i ’ll call [you]_2430-tristan later . ”_[2959-i] “ What ? ”_{[2300-a man]} [He]_{2300-a man} hangs up . “ Ahhh , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i cry . [My]_2959-i eyes fill with tears of frustration . [He]_{2300-a man} would n’t believe it . Surely , [he]_{2300-a man} knows it ’s not true . . . but there ’s a photo as evidence . [I]_2959-i dial [Molly]_198-molly ’s number . “ Hey , [chick]_3199-chick , do [you]_2430-tristan want a coffee ? ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly asks chirpily . “ [Molly]_198-molly , ”_[198-molly] [I]_2959-i cry in relief that [someone]_2326-someone answers [their]_2326-someone damn phone . “ Oh [my]_2959-i God , it ’s all lies . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stop on the spot on [the busy sidewalk]_{1762-the busy sidewalk} and move to the side up against [the building]_{361-the building} to talk . “ What ’s wrong ? ”_[2959-i] “ The Gazette , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer . “ Google [the Gazette]_{596-the gazette} . There ’s an image on the front page of [me]_2959-i kissing [Jake]_108-jay , and it says [we]_3201-we are having an affair . ”_[2959-i] “ What ? ”_[2959-i] “ [Somebody]_251-somebody must have been following [me]_2959-i , or . . . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shake [my]_2959-i head as [I]_2959-i try and think of a logical explanation . “ What the fucking hell is going on ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper angrily . “ Holy shit . ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly pauses . “ [I]_198-molly see it . Wait . . . when the fuck did [you]_198-molly kiss [Jake]_108-jay ? ”_[198-molly] “ [He]_108-jay kissed [me]_2959-i last night , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer . “ [I]_2959-i did n’t kiss [him]_108-jay back , for fuck ’s sake . Do [you]_198-molly — ”_[2959-i] “ Hang on ; [I]_198-molly ’m reading , ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly interrupts [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i put [my]_2959-i hand over [my]_2959-i face as [I]_2959-i wait for [her]_198-molly to read . “ Oh [my]_198-molly God , ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly whispers . “ [Alan]_246-alan brought [me]_198-molly back to [[my]_198-molly apartment]_{766-my apartment} and told [me]_198-molly not to come into work today . ”_[198-molly] “ What ? ”_[198-molly] “ [He]_246-alan said that [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} will contact [me]_198-molly later . ”_[198-molly] “ Well , what did [Jameson]_186-jameson say ? ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly asks . “ [He]_246-alan wo n’t answer [his]_246-alan phone . [I]_198-molly called [Tristan]_2430-tristan , but [he]_246-alan said [they]_3204-they are in meetings , and [he]_246-alan ’ll call [me]_198-molly later . ”_[198-molly] “ Holy . . . fucking . . . shit . This is bad . ”_[198-molly] “ [You]_198-molly think ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i cry . “ What are [you]_198-molly going to do ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_198-molly do n’t know . What do [I]_198-molly do ? ”_[198-molly] “ Well , if [Jameson]_186-jameson told [you]_198-molly to stay [home]_2289-home , maybe [you]_198-molly should . ”_[2959-i] “ Why ? ”_[2959-i] “ Because [he]_246-alan does n’t need more attention ; it says here [he]_246-alan ’s been accused of theft . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes widen as [I]_2959-i imagine the media storm that ’s going to come from this . “ But what if [he]_246-alan believes this ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer . “ [I]_2959-i ’ve never been with [Jake]_108-jay . This is complete bullshit . [I]_2959-i love [him]_108-jay . ”_[2959-i] “ [He]_108-jay said [he]_108-jay will be in touch . . . [he]_108-jay will be . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i listen as [my]_2959-i mind runs at a million miles an hour . “ [You]_108-jay ’re just going to have to wait . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i screw up [my]_2959-i face in tears . “ [You]_108-jay do n’t think [I]_2959-i should come in ? ”_[2959-i] “ [God]_0-aaron , no . [He]_108-jay does n’t have time to worry about [you]_108-jay too . ”_[2959-i] “ But [I]_2959-i did n’t do this , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ [I]_2959-i know . [I]_2959-i ’ll go up and see [him]_108-jay in [[his]_108-jay office]_{426-his office} and tell [him]_108-jay everything . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_108-jay will ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper hopefully . “ If [you]_108-jay come in , Em , [the whole building]_{3207-the whole building} is going to attack [you]_108-jay . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i put [my]_2959-i hands over [my]_2959-i face in horror as [I]_2959-i imagine [everyone]_{2304-everyone} waking up to this story this morning . [I]_2959-i ’m going to be [Miles Media]_{68-miles media} ’s public enemy number one . “ [I]_1765-i ’m going to get into work and find out what the hell is going on , and [I]_1765-i ’ll call [you]_108-jay back , okay ? ”_[1765-i] [she]_1765-i says . [I]_2959-i nod , [my]_2959-i eyes filled with tears . [I]_2959-i ca n’t believe this is happening . “ Okay . ”_[2959-i] “ Go back to [[your]_108-jay apartment]_{2745-your apartment} and wait . [I]_1765-i ’ll be in touch . ”_[1765-i] “ Thank [you]_108-jay , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper as [I]_2959-i wait on the line . “ Wait , what are [you]_108-jay going to say to [Jameson]_186-jameson ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i ’m just going to tell [him]_186-jameson the truth . [I]_2959-i ’ll call [you]_108-jay back in half an hour . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i shoulders slump . “ Okay , thanks . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i hang up . [I]_2959-i walk from [[my]_2959-i kitchen]_{1679-my kitchen} and back to the living area . [I]_2959-i turn and walk back the same route . It ’s been forty minutes . [Jameson]_186-jameson still is n’t answering [his]_186-jameson phone , and [Molly]_198-molly has n’t called [me]_2959-i back . What the fucking hell is going on over there ? [I]_2959-i text [Jameson]_186-jameson a message . [Jay]_108-jay [I]_2959-i do n’t know what the hell is going on . That photo is a setup . [You]_1767-you know [I]_2959-i love [you]_1767-you and would never do that . Call [me]_2959-i back , please . [I]_2959-i ’m freaking out ! ! ! [I]_2959-i throw [my]_2959-i phone onto [the lounge]_{252-the lounge} and continue [my]_2959-i pacing . Why is n’t [anyone]_272-anyone calling [me]_2959-i back ? [I]_2959-i wait twenty minutes and then text [Jameson]_186-jameson again . [My]_2959-i phone rings , and [I]_2959-i scramble to answer it . It ’s [Molly]_198-molly . “ Hello . ”_[198-molly] “ Hi . ”_[198-molly] “ What happened ? ”_[198-molly] “ [I]_198-molly could n’t get in to see [him]_186-jameson ; [he]_186-jameson was in a meeting with [the solicitors]_{3209-the solicitors} , ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly whispers . “ [He]_186-jameson ’s got bigger things to worry about at the moment , [Em]_186-jameson . [He]_186-jameson could go to [prison]_3210-prison . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . What ? “ Oh [my]_2959-i God . ”_[2959-i] “ Management is going nuts down here . [I]_198-molly have to get off the phone before [I]_198-molly get fired . ”_[198-molly] “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes fill with tears . . . [I]_2959-i did n’t do this . “ [I]_2959-i could give a rat ’s ass about [the company]_{2358-the company} right now . [I]_2959-i need [him]_186-jameson to know that [I]_2959-i did n’t do anything with [Jake]_108-jay . That whole story is bogus . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i know . [I]_2959-i ’ll go back up in [my]_2959-i lunch break . But for now , hang tight . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i put [my]_2959-i hand over [my]_2959-i mouth as a roll of nausea fills [my]_2959-i stomach . “ [I]_2959-i ’ll call [you]_2959-i back as soon as [I]_2959-i speak to [him]_1772-he . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i wait on the line , hoping for a miracle answer to come to [us]_1770-us . “ Okay ? ”_[1771-she] [she]_1771-she asks . “ Yeah , okay , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper before hanging up the call . [I]_2959-i begin to pace once more with a new sense of urgency . What if [he]_1772-he believes this ? What if [the board]_{1717-the board} believes that [he]_1772-he stole the money ? What if [he]_1772-he ’s charged . . . and goes to [prison]_3210-prison ? Oh [[my]_2959-i God]_{2363-my god} . [I]_2959-i text [him]_1772-he again . [I]_2959-i ’m serious . Call [me]_2959-i back NOW ! ! [I]_2959-i ’m losing [my]_2959-i mind over here . Another thirty minutes pass as [I]_2959-i continue to pace . [I]_2959-i ca n’t deal with this waiting . [I]_2959-i call [Molly]_198-molly , and it goes straight to voice mail . [I]_2959-i hang up in a fluster and call [Aaron]_0-aaron . [His]_0-aaron phone rings out . “ What the actual hell ! ”_[0-aaron] [I]_2959-i cry through tears . “ What ’s going on over there ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i text [Jameson]_186-jameson again . Call [me]_2959-i now , or [I]_2959-i ’m coming into [the office]_{385-new york} ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! [I]_2959-i ’m getting angry , [you]_2959-i must know [I]_2959-i ’m frantic . [My]_2959-i phone rings , and the letter [J]_127-j lights up the screen . [I]_2959-i pick up a rush . “ Oh [my]_2959-i God , [Jay]_108-jay . ”_[2959-i] “ Hi , ”_[0-aaron] [he]_0-aaron answers , monotone . “ What ’s going on ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ [Jay]_108-jay . [I]_0-aaron ca n’t believe the lies . [He]_0-aaron kissed [me]_0-aaron once , and [I]_0-aaron slapped [him]_0-aaron across the face . [I]_0-aaron promise [you]_0-aaron that [I]_0-aaron ’m not seeing that slimeball . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron stays silent . A sense of dread fills [me]_2959-i . Why is [he]_0-aaron so quiet ? “ [Jay]_108-jay . ”_[0-aaron] “ [You]_0-aaron did n’t think to tell [me]_0-aaron about this ? ”_[0-aaron] “ It only happened last night . ”_[0-aaron] “ [You]_0-aaron said [you]_0-aaron were with fucking [Molly]_198-molly ! ”_[0-aaron] [he]_0-aaron screams . [My]_2959-i eyes fill with tears at the sound of [his]_0-aaron anger . “ [I]_2959-i know [I]_2959-i did , but [he]_0-aaron said [he]_0-aaron had some information about the case , and [I]_2959-i knew [you]_0-aaron would n’t want [me]_2959-i to meet [him]_0-aaron alone . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_0-aaron wonder fucking why ? ”_[0-aaron] [he]_0-aaron bellows . [I]_2959-i screw up [my]_2959-i face . “ Do n’t be angry with [me]_2959-i , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ That picture is . . . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shake [my]_2959-i head as [I]_2959-i try to articulate what it is that [I]_2959-i want to say . “ It ’s taken out of context , [I]_2959-i promise [you]_0-aaron . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i have to go . Stay out of sight . [I]_2959-i do n’t need to worry about [you]_0-aaron too . ”_[2959-i] “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer . “ [I]_2959-i ’m too busy . ”_[2959-i] “ Do n’t go , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i plead . “ [Jay]_108-jay , [we]_3212-we need to talk about this . [I]_2959-i ’ll come to [[your]_108-jay office]_{455-my office} now . ”_[2959-i] “ Do n’t [you]_0-aaron dare , ”_[2959-i] [he]_2959-i sneers . [My]_2959-i eyes widen . “ What do [you]_0-aaron mean ? ”_[2959-i] “ There are [a million and fucking one people in [[my]_2959-i office]_{455-my office}]_{3214-a million and fucking one people in my office} right now , and [I]_2959-i do n’t have the fucking time to deal with [your]_0-aaron shit , ”_[2959-i] [he]_2959-i growls . [I]_2959-i cringe . . . [God]_0-aaron , [I]_2959-i ’ve never heard [him]_2959-i so angry . “ Will [I]_0-aaron see [you]_0-aaron tonight ? ”_[0-aaron] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ Goodbye , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] The line goes dead . [I]_2959-i drop to the couch and stare at the wall . . . a sick sense of dread begins to sink in . . . [he]_2959-i believes it . Holy fuck . Eight o’clock that evening [I]_2959-i sit on [the lounge]_{252-the lounge} and listen to the sound of a movie as it plays on the television . [I]_2959-i ca n’t watch the news . [I]_2959-i had to turn it off . It ’s going on and on about [the evidence building against [Jameson]_186-jameson]_{1778-the evidence building against jameson} and the embezzlement case . [My]_2959-i mind is miles away . [Jameson]_186-jameson has n’t called [me]_2959-i back all day , and [I]_2959-i do n’t know what ’s going on over there at [Miles Media]_{14-miles media} , but [I]_2959-i know it ’s a media circus . [I]_2959-i ’m torn between giving [him]_2959-i the space that [he]_2959-i needs and running to [him]_2959-i as fast as [I]_2959-i can . [I]_2959-i ’ve decided that [I]_2959-i ’m going to do as [he]_2959-i asked and just stay [here]_{385-new york} and sit tight . [He]_2959-i will call [me]_2959-i as soon as [he]_2959-i can . [I]_2959-i know [he]_2959-i will , and [he]_2959-i ’s right — [me]_2959-i being out and about will only add fuel to the fire . [He]_2959-i really does n’t need to worry about [me]_2959-i , too , at the moment . The magnitude of the situation has finally sunk in . What ’s going to happen if [they]_1780-they ca n’t find out who transferred that money ? How long can [Jameson]_186-jameson deal with this type of pressure ? With a lump in [my]_2959-i throat [I]_2959-i begin to pace . [My]_2959-i carpet must be nearly threadbare after today ’s pacing activities . [I]_2959-i ca n’t remember ever being this stressed . At eleven o’clock at night , [I]_2959-i have n’t heard from [Jameson]_186-jameson , and [I]_2959-i am sick with worry , literally . [I]_2959-i ’ve thrown up twice . [I]_2959-i decide to call [him]_186-jameson one last time . . . where is [he]_186-jameson ? With shaky fingers , [I]_2959-i dial [his]_186-jameson number , and it rings and then goes to voice mail . [He]_186-jameson ’s declined the call . [My]_2959-i heart sinks , and [my]_2959-i eyes fill with tears . “ This is [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson ; leave a message , ”_[2959-i] the recorded message plays . “ Hello . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pause . “ [Jay]_108-jay , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ [Baby]_215-baby . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i get a lump in [my]_2959-i throat . “ [I]_2959-i ’m sorry for lying . [I]_2959-i was trying to find out about the case , and then [he]_186-jameson kissed [me]_2959-i and . . . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i voice trails off . “ [I]_2959-i know how this looks , but [you]_2959-i have to believe [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i do n’t even like [Jake]_108-jay as [a friend]_{2302-a friend} ; [you]_2959-i know that . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i walk to the window and stare out over the traffic . “ [I]_2959-i ’m going out of [my]_2959-i mind here . . . [I]_2959-i love [you]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stay silent , unsure what to say . “ Do n’t let them poison [your]_2959-i mind , [Jay]_108-jay . [You]_2959-i ’re [the only person who knows what [we]_3216-we have]_108-jay , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper through tears . “ Come [home]_2289-home to [me]_2959-i , where [you]_2959-i belong . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pause , hoping that [I]_2959-i ’m getting through to [him]_2959-i . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t even want to hang up . . . [I]_2959-i need [you]_2959-i . Please come over . . . [I]_2959-i ’m begging . ”_[2959-i] The other end stays deathly silent , and [I]_2959-i screw up [my]_2959-i face in pain . “ [I]_2959-i love [you]_2959-i , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . The beep sounds , and [I]_2959-i am cut off . [I]_2959-i throw the phone onto [the lounge]_{252-the lounge} and begin to cry . What the hell is happening ? With [my]_2959-i heart in [my]_2959-i throat , [I]_2959-i walk into [the Miles Media building]_{521-the miles media building} . It ’s eight thirty in the morning , and [I]_2959-i ’m coming to work . [Jay]_108-jay did n’t call [me]_2959-i back last night , and [I]_2959-i ca n’t say that [I]_2959-i blame [him]_108-jay . [I]_2959-i cried [myself]_2959-i to sleep . . . well , [I]_2959-i did n’t really sleep , so [I]_2959-i do n’t think it counts . [I]_2959-i ’ve got this sick lead ball in [my]_2959-i stomach , and it wo n’t go away . [I]_2959-i have [no one]_{1783-no one} to blame for this fucking mess but [myself]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i lied to [my]_2959-i love , and it backfired , and now [he]_108-jay thinks the worst . So [I]_2959-i ’m here today to do the best job that [I]_2959-i can of making it up to [him]_108-jay . [He]_108-jay ’s hurt . . . [I]_2959-i know [he]_108-jay is . [[My]_2959-i poor man]_108-jay seemingly has the whole world against [him]_108-jay , and [I]_2959-i ’m so worried about [him]_108-jay . How much stress can [a man]_{2300-a man} take before [he]_108-jay cracks ? [I]_2959-i get into [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} and swipe [my]_2959-i security card to the top floors , and a red light comes up . [I]_2959-i frown . No . [I]_2959-i swipe it again , and the red light flickers again . “ No , [Jay]_108-jay . . . do n’t do this , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper through tears . “ Do n’t [you]_108-jay fucking lock [me]_2959-i out . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i swipe it again ; the red light flickers once more . “ [[You]_108-jay son of [a bitch]_{2519-a bitch}]_{3218-you son of a bitch} , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper angrily . [I]_2959-i hit the fortieth - floor button , and the green light appears . [My]_2959-i heart begins to hammer hard in [my]_2959-i chest . [He]_108-jay ’s blocked [my]_2959-i access to [his]_108-jay floor . [I]_2959-i take out [my]_2959-i phone and text [him]_108-jay . Are [you]_1786-you serious ? [You]_1786-you ca n’t even talk to [me]_2959-i ? [The elevator]_{375-the elevator} doors open , and [I]_2959-i stride out onto [my]_2959-i floor as [I]_2959-i try to calm [my]_2959-i anger down . [I]_2959-i know [he]_108-jay ’s got a lot going on , but [he]_108-jay knows this is hurting [me]_2959-i , and [he]_108-jay does n’t seem to care . Is this how [he]_108-jay works ? [He]_108-jay ’s just going to cut [me]_2959-i from [his]_108-jay life without even letting [me]_2959-i explain ? [I]_2959-i sit at [my]_2959-i desk and stare into space . [My]_2959-i leg bounces in anger . . . what do [I]_2959-i do ? How do [I]_2959-i make [him]_108-jay understand that this is all a misunderstanding if [he]_108-jay wo n’t even talk to [me]_2959-i ? [A group of girls]_{1339-a group of girls} walk out of [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} and begin to walk down [the corridor]_{609-the corridor} , and then [they]_{1339-a group of girls} all stop on the spot when [they]_{1339-a group of girls} see [me]_2959-i , as if shocked . [I]_2959-i stare at [them]_{1339-a group of girls} , and [they]_{1339-a group of girls} exchange looks and then smirk to each other . “ Hi . ”_{[1339-a group of girls]} [One of [them]_{1339-a group of girls}]_{2784-one of them} fakes a smile . “ Hi , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reply . [I]_2959-i turn and switch on [my]_2959-i computer . Great . Now [I]_2959-i ’m [the office]_{385-new york} gossip as well — can this fucking situation get any worse ? “ [Yay]_336-yay , [you]_336-yay ’re here , ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly ’s familiar voice sounds from behind [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i swing in [my]_2959-i chair toward [her]_198-molly , and [her]_198-molly face falls when [she]_198-molly sees [mine]_2959-i . “ Oh , [baby]_336-yay , ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly whispers as [she]_198-molly puts [her]_198-molly arms around [me]_2959-i . “ Are [you]_336-yay all right ? ”_[198-molly] “ [He]_3220-he ’s blocked [my]_2959-i access to [his]_3220-he floor , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper against [her]_198-molly shoulder . “ What ? ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly whispers as [she]_198-molly fixes [my]_2959-i hair . “ [He]_3220-he ’s just . . . ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly hesitates . “ [God]_0-aaron , [I]_2959-i do n’t even know what to say , [Em]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stare sadly at [my]_2959-i computer . “ Let ’s just get [our]_3221-our work done , and [we]_3221-our can brainstorm over lunch . ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly smiles as [she]_198-molly rubs [my]_2959-i shoulder . “ Yeah , [I]_198-molly guess . ”_[198-molly] Over the next half hour , [I]_2959-i watch on as [everyone]_{2304-everyone} arrives for [their]_{2304-everyone} day , sees [me]_2959-i , and then proceeds to whisper to [the person next to [them]_{2304-everyone}]_{1794-the person next to them} . [I]_2959-i ’m not only the office gossip ; [I]_2959-i ’m [the office]_{385-new york} slut . [The idiot who played upon [the CEO]_{2388-the ceo} with [the company douche]_{1798-the company douche}]_{1796-the idiot who played upon the ceo with the company douche} . . . [I]_2959-i ’m embarrassed , [I]_2959-i ’m ashamed , and this is appalling . It ’s four o’clock , and [Jameson]_186-jameson has n’t answered any of [my]_2959-i calls . [I]_2959-i think [I]_2959-i ’m losing [my]_2959-i mind . [Aaron]_0-aaron thinks [I]_2959-i should give [him]_0-aaron time . [Molly]_198-molly thinks [I]_2959-i should be dropped onto [his]_0-aaron floor by [a helicopter]_{1799-a helicopter} . . . either that or bomb the whole floor . [Me]_2959-i . . . [I]_2959-i just want to crawl under a rock and hide . [Molly]_198-molly returns from [the photocopy room]_{3177-the photocopy room} and smiles sweetly over at [me]_2959-i . “ What ? ”_[198-molly] “ Say , ‘ Thank [you]_198-molly , [Molly]_198-molly . [You]_198-molly ’re [a lifesaver]_{3222-a lifesaver} . ’ ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly smirks . [I]_2959-i frown . [She]_198-molly passes [me]_2959-i over a security card , and [I]_2959-i stare at it in [my]_2959-i hand . “ What ’s this ? ”_[198-molly] “ It ’s [Melissa]_217-melissa ’s card to get to the top floors . [I]_2959-i stole it . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes widen . “ [You]_198-molly stole [her]_198-molly card ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper as [I]_2959-i look around guiltily . “ How else are [you]_198-molly going to get to see the stupid fuck ? ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly murmurs . [I]_2959-i smile at [her]_198-molly perfect choice of words . “ Thanks . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i go to [the bathroom]_{300-the bathroom} and stare at [my]_2959-i reflection in the mirror . [I]_2959-i look like shit . [I]_2959-i drop [my]_2959-i shoulders and inhale deeply as [I]_2959-i steel [myself]_2959-i . Let ’s do this . [I]_2959-i take [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} to the top floor , with [my]_2959-i heart hammering hard in [my]_2959-i chest . [I]_2959-i have no idea what ’s going to be awaiting [me]_2959-i , but bring it the fuck on , because [I]_2959-i ’m getting angry now . How dare [he]_1803-his not even let [me]_2959-i explain ? [The elevator]_{375-the elevator} opens , and [Sammia]_246-alan ’s face drops as [she]_246-alan sees [me]_2959-i . “ [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_[246-alan] [she]_246-alan stammers as [she]_246-alan stands . “ [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} is n’t here . ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i storm past [her]_246-alan and down [the hall]_{514-the room} and open [his]_1803-his door in a rush . . . and there [he]_1803-his sits behind [his]_1803-his desk , [his]_1803-his cold , calm persona firmly in place . [Elliot]_140-elliot is sitting with [him]_140-elliot , and [his]_140-elliot eyes snap up . “ How did [you]_140-elliot get up [here]_{385-new york} ? ”_[140-elliot] [My]_2959-i eyes find [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s across [the room]_{514-the room} , and [I]_2959-i can see the hurt from here . “ Can [you]_140-elliot give [us]_3224-us a moment , please ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ No , ”_[140-elliot] [Elliot]_140-elliot snaps . “ Leave now . ”_[140-elliot] [My]_2959-i anger bubbles . “ With all due respect , this is none of [your]_140-elliot business , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . [Elliot]_140-elliot narrows [his]_140-elliot eyes and stands . “ How dare [you]_140-elliot — this is entirely [my]_140-elliot business ! ”_[140-elliot] “ Oh , [I]_2959-i dare all right , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i fire back . [Jameson]_186-jameson clenches [his]_186-jameson jaw , and [Tristan]_2430-tristan comes into [the office]_{385-new york} . [His]_186-jameson step falters when [he]_186-jameson sees [me]_2959-i . “ [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson frowns as [he]_186-jameson looks between [the three of [us]_{525-the three of us}]_{525-the three of us} . “ [Tristan]_2430-tristan , [I]_186-jameson need a moment with [Jameson]_186-jameson , please , ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i ask [him]_186-jameson hopefully . “ Of course . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson forces a weak smile . “ Out , [Elliot]_140-elliot . ”_[140-elliot] [Elliot]_140-elliot glares at [me]_2959-i . “ Now , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan repeats . [Elliot]_140-elliot and [Tristan]_2430-tristan leave [the office]_{385-new york} , and [we]_{525-the three of us} are left alone . [Jameson]_186-jameson stands and goes to the window , turning [his]_186-jameson back to [me]_2959-i . Oh God , how do [I]_2959-i fix this ? “ [Jay]_108-jay , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper as [I]_2959-i walk toward [him]_186-jameson . “ [Baby]_215-baby , [I]_186-jameson did n’t do this . . . [you]_215-baby have to believe [me]_186-jameson . [I]_186-jameson know how this looks . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson remains silent . “ [He]_186-jameson kissed [me]_186-jameson , and [I]_186-jameson slapped [him]_186-jameson , and [I]_186-jameson had no idea that [someone]_2326-someone took a photo , ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i stammer . Silence . [I]_2959-i see [his]_186-jameson jaw clench from the side as [he]_186-jameson stares out over [New York]_{385-new york} . “ Are [you]_215-baby at least going to talk to [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i cry . “ Why did [you]_215-baby block [my]_186-jameson access to this floor ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson turns , angered . “ Because [I]_186-jameson do n’t trust [you]_215-baby . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i step back , shocked . “ What ? ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_215-baby heard [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i do n’t trust [you]_215-baby . Get out . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i face falls . “ [Jameson]_186-jameson , [I]_2959-i know [you]_215-baby ’re under a lot of pressure . ”_[2959-i] “ This has nothing to do with the fucking pressure [I]_186-jameson ’m under ! ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson screams . [I]_2959-i wither . “ [You]_215-baby can trust [me]_2959-i , [I]_2959-i promise [you]_215-baby . ”_[2959-i] “ Where did [you]_215-baby tell [me]_186-jameson [you]_215-baby were on Monday night , [Emily]_186-jameson ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson sneers . [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_186-jameson through tears . “ [I]_186-jameson was trying to find out information . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ By lying to [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i nod . “ [I]_2959-i know it sounds like . . . ”_[2959-i] “ Like [I]_186-jameson ca n’t trust [you]_215-baby . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson turns [his]_186-jameson back and lifts [his]_186-jameson chin skyward in defiance . “ [I]_186-jameson have more to worry about at the moment than dealing with [a deceitful girlfriend]_{3226-a deceitful girlfriend} . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [Jameson]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ [We]_3227-we have nothing to further talk about , [Emily]_186-jameson . . . get out , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson says calmly . “ No , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i plead . “ [I]_186-jameson ’m not leaving . [I]_186-jameson love [you]_215-baby . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson turns , and [his]_186-jameson cold eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ Did [you]_215-baby practice that speech ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [My]_2959-i heart drops . . . oh , [he]_186-jameson ’s so hurt . “ [Jay]_108-jay . . . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ If [you]_215-baby wo n’t leave . . . [I]_186-jameson will . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson strides toward the door , and it closes quietly behind [him]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i close [my]_2959-i eyes in the silence and inhale through [my]_2959-i shaking chest . Did [he]_186-jameson just end [us]_1808-us ? This ca n’t be happening . It ’s six o’clock , and [I]_2959-i ’m sitting at the café across [the street]_{550-the street} from [Miles Media]_{14-miles media} . [I]_2959-i ’m watching the media circus gather as [they]_1810-they wait for [Jameson]_186-jameson to leave [the building]_{361-the building} . This embezzlement scandal is news . . . big news , and while the rest of [the world]_{249-the world} is hanging on to the story , [I]_2959-i ’ve been on the edge of tears all day . [I]_2959-i do n’t know what to do or how to reach [him]_186-jameson . [He]_186-jameson ’s put [his]_186-jameson defenses up , and with everything else going on for [him]_186-jameson at the moment , [I]_2959-i do n’t know how hard [I]_2959-i can push without [him]_186-jameson completely losing it . [I]_2959-i do n’t want to stress [him]_186-jameson out further , but [he]_186-jameson needs [me]_2959-i more than ever at the moment . [I]_2959-i put [my]_2959-i head into [my]_2959-i hands . Why the hell did [I]_2959-i go and meet [Jake]_108-jay ? What the fuck was [I]_2959-i thinking ? How was that ever a good idea ? [I]_2959-i go over that night in [my]_2959-i head , and [I]_2959-i can hear [myself]_2959-i lying straight out to [Jameson]_186-jameson when [I]_2959-i got [home]_2289-home . . . why ? At the time , [I]_2959-i thought [I]_2959-i was protecting [him]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i know better now . This is one big mess , and [I]_2959-i have no idea how to fix it . [My]_2959-i mind goes to the money that has been stolen from the accounts . [They]_1814-they all think it ’s [Ferrara]_2430-tristan , but why would [Ferrara]_2430-tristan , [a man who already makes billions of dollars a year , risk it all to take down [a competitor]_{2649-a competitor}]_{1815-a man who already makes billions of dollars a year , risk it all to take down a competitor} ? It just does n’t make sense to [me]_2959-i . In [my]_2959-i eyes , [the person who has stolen the millions needs the millions]_{1815-a man who already makes billions of dollars a year , risk it all to take down a competitor} . But who is it , and how the hell did [they]_1814-they get access to [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s banking details ? There ’s more to this case than meets the eye . [Molly]_198-molly , [Aaron]_0-aaron , and [I]_2959-i are having a crisis breakfast meeting tomorrow , and hopefully together [we]_1817-we can brainstorm a plan of action . [I]_2959-i hear a flurry of excitement , and [I]_2959-i look up to see [Jameson]_186-jameson walk from [the building]_{361-the building} , flanked by security as [the reporters clamber around [him]_186-jameson]_{1819-the reporters clamber around him} , shouting [his]_186-jameson name and clicking photos . [He]_186-jameson keeps [his]_186-jameson head down and does n’t comment and then climbs into the back of [[his]_186-jameson limo]_{1820-his limo} . It pulls out from [the curb]_{549-the curb} and whisks [him]_186-jameson away into the night . . . and further away from [me]_2959-i . An overwhelming sadness seeps into [my]_2959-i bones . How can [I]_2959-i help [him]_186-jameson ? “ Okay , so here are the facts , ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly states . [We]_1822-we ’re at breakfast trying to dissect [my]_2959-i mess of a life . [I]_2959-i ’m more zombie than human , having not slept for two nights . [I]_2959-i ’m on [my]_2959-i second coffee , and it ’s seven o’clock . “ [You]_3228-you lied to [Jameson]_186-jameson about where [you]_3228-you were going and went out to dinner with [Jake]_108-jay , ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly says . [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes . “ [You]_3228-you got [home]_2289-home and then lied again to [Jameson]_186-jameson about where [you]_3228-you had been . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i blow out a deep breath . “ Correct . ”_[2959-i] “ Now , ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly continues , “ [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s whole life is falling apart , and [he]_186-jameson is being accused of a crime that [he]_186-jameson did n’t do . ”_[198-molly] “ Yes , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap before [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i coffee . “ [The entire world]_{3230-the entire world} is watching , and [you]_3228-you are [public enemy number one]_{3231-public enemy number one} . ”_[2959-i] “ How is this fucking helping [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer . [Aaron]_0-aaron and [Molly]_198-molly make eye contact across the table . “ This does n’t look good , ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron says . “ [I]_2959-i know . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i put [my]_2959-i head into [my]_2959-i hands . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t know how to help [him]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i ’ve completely screwed everything up . [I]_2959-i ’m the villain in this story , and [I]_2959-i want to be [the hero]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] Silence falls across the table as [we]_1823-we sip [our]_1823-we coffees . [Aarons]_218-aarons eyes light up . “ [I]_218-aarons ’ve got it . ”_[218-aarons] “ Huh ? ”_[218-aarons] “ [I]_2959-i know how [you]_2959-i could be [the hero]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes . “ How ? ”_[2959-i] “ Solve the case . . . [you]_2959-i ’re [a reporter]_{2566-a reporter} ; [you]_2959-i ’ve done this shit before . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sit up , suddenly interested . “ [Those private investigators]_{3233-those private investigators} are obviously fucking useless ; [they]_{3233-those private investigators} are doing nothing . ”_[2959-i] “ That ’s true . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ But [I]_2959-i do n’t know anything about computers . Where would [I]_2959-i even start trying to track those transfers ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_198-molly do n’t know , but finding out where that money has gone [yourself]_3234-you does seem like the only way [you]_3234-you are getting [Jameson]_186-jameson out of this . ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly shrugs . “ [We]_3235-we could help ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i think about it for a moment . Why could n’t [I]_2959-i do this [myself]_2959-i ? [I]_2959-i ’ve cracked cases before — big cases too . “ [You]_3234-you know what — [you’re]_3234-you right . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i feel a fire start in [my]_2959-i stomach . “ [I]_198-molly am going to find out who ’s doing this . ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly and [Aaron]_0-aaron smile . “ And when [I]_198-molly do”—I_[198-molly] punch [my]_2959-i hand into [my]_2959-i fist—“they will wish [they]_3236-they were fucking dead for messing with [[my]_198-molly man]_{2829-my man} . ”_[198-molly] “ [Attagirl]_219-attagirl . ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly smiles . [She]_198-molly and [Aaron]_0-aaron high - five each other . [I]_2959-i smile as [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i coffee , and for the first time in days , [I]_2959-i feel hopeful . [I]_2959-i hold [my]_2959-i coffee cup up , and [we]_1824-we all clink cups . “ To [Operation Hero]_{3238-operation hero} . ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson [I]_2959-i run down [the street]_{550-the street} as fast as [I]_2959-i can , [my]_2959-i mind a clouded fog . With every step that [I]_2959-i run . . . the better [I]_2959-i feel . It ’s been three days since [I]_2959-i ’ve seen [her]_198-molly . . . three days incarcerated in hell . [I]_2959-i ca n’t see [her]_198-molly . [I]_2959-i ca n’t put [myself]_2959-i in that position ever again . [Nobody]_2321-nobody is worth feeling this bad for . . . [nobody]_2321-nobody . [I]_2959-i turn [the corner]_{672-the corner} and run past [a row of [restaurants]_{2621-restaurants}]_{1829-a row of restaurants} and get to [a park]_{1831-a park} , and [I]_2959-i see [a person]_{2585-a person} up ahead in the darkness . [Their]_{2585-a person} stance seems familiar , and [I]_2959-i squint [my]_2959-i eyes to try and see . As [I]_2959-i run , a cold sense of realization hits [me]_2959-i as to who it is . [Gabriel Ferrara]_2430-tristan . [He]_2430-tristan ’s on the phone and smoking a cigar as [he]_2430-tristan leans on [his]_2430-tristan black Ferrari . [He]_2430-tristan has n’t seen [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i stop running and pant as [I]_2959-i approach [him]_2430-tristan . Fucking dog . [I]_2959-i ’m furious that [he]_2430-tristan put that photo of [Emily]_186-jameson on the front page of [his]_2430-tristan paper . It was a direct attack on [me]_2959-i . . . and it hit the target . Turning , [he]_2430-tristan sees [me]_2959-i , and [his]_2430-tristan face falls . “ [I]_2430-tristan ’ve got to go . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan hangs up [his]_2430-tristan call . “ Look what crawled out of the gutter , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pant . [He]_2430-tristan smirks as [he]_2430-tristan inhales on [his]_2430-tristan cigar . “ Miles . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [I]_2959-i glare at [him]_2430-tristan . “ How ’s [that girl of yours]_{3239-that girl of yours} ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} [he]_2430-tristan asks with a wink . “ [You]_{3239-that girl of yours} should put [her]_{3239-that girl of yours} on a leash . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [I]_2959-i glare at [him]_2430-tristan . [He]_2430-tristan flicks [his]_2430-tristan cigar at [me]_2959-i ; [my]_2959-i fury begins to bubble . [I]_2959-i step forward . “ [You]_{3239-that girl of yours} know [she]_{3239-that girl of yours} made a move on [me]_2959-i . Seems like [you]_{3239-that girl of yours} ’ve lost [your]_{3239-that girl of yours} edge with everything : the company , the bank accounts . Sex . How does it feel to have [[your]_{3239-that girl of yours} woman]_{3240-your woman} search for [someone who can satisfy [her]_{3240-your woman} needs]_{3241-someone who can satisfy her needs} ? ”_[2959-i] All [I]_2959-i can see is red . . . blinding anger . [I]_2959-i lose control and punch [him]_2430-tristan hard in the face , and then [I]_2959-i hit [him]_2430-tristan again and again in quick succession . [He]_2430-tristan falls to the ground beside [[his]_2430-tristan car]_{2417-his car} , and [I]_2959-i hear [someone]_2326-someone yell , “ Call [the police]_{368-the police} ! ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ Fuck . . . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i look down to [his]_2430-tristan slumped body and the blood pouring from [his]_2430-tristan nose . What have [I]_2959-i done ? [I]_2959-i turn and sprint as hard as [I]_2959-i can into the darkness . [I]_2959-i run down [a block]_{1835-a block} and cut through [a park]_{1831-a park} as [I]_2959-i hear a police siren in the distance . Fuck . [I]_2959-i run across [the street]_{550-the street} , and [a car]_{2985-a car} comes out of nowhere . Bright lights , [car]_{2985-a car} horn , blurred vision . It hits [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i go flying into the air . Darkness . . . nothing . Chapter 22 [Emily]_186-jameson On [my]_2959-i laptop , [I]_2959-i scroll through the information that [I]_2959-i ’ve collected today . [I]_2959-i have nothing to go on other than [Hayden]_266-jim . [He]_266-jim ’s [the only the person who has a shady past and [the only person [I]_2959-i can think of who would double - cross [Miles Media]_{14-miles media}]_266-jim]_266-jim . But selling shitty stories is a far cry from stealing millions of dollars from a global company . [I]_2959-i do n’t think [he]_266-jim ’s capable of something like this . So why is [my]_2959-i gut telling [me]_2959-i that [he]_266-jim is somehow involved ? [I]_2959-i check [my]_2959-i phone . . . no messages . Please call [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i get a vision of [[my]_2959-i Jameson]_{1839-my jameson} all alone in [[his]_266-jim big apartment]_{1840-his big apartment} , and [my]_2959-i heart aches . [I]_2959-i ’ve decided that [I]_2959-i ’m going over there tomorrow night and knocking the door down . [I]_2959-i ca n’t give [him]_266-jim the space that [he]_266-jim needs . . . [I]_2959-i need [him]_266-jim . The door buzzes , and [I]_2959-i jump up , excited . [Jameson]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i run to [the telecom]_{1841-the telecom} to see [two police officers on the screen]_{1842-two police officers on the screen} . [I]_2959-i push the button . “ Hello ? ”_[2959-i] “ Is that [Emily Foster]_186-jameson ? ”_[2959-i] “ Yes . ”_[2959-i] “ Can [we]_3243-we come up , please ? ”_[2959-i] “ What ’s wrong ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . Oh [my]_2959-i God , what ’s happened ? “ [We]_3243-we need to talk to [you]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] “ Has something happened ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer . “ Let [us]_3243-we in , please . ”_[2959-i] “ Okay . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i push the button with [my]_2959-i heart pumping hard . Moments later [they]_{1842-two police officers on the screen} knock on the door , and [I]_2959-i open it in a rush . “ Hello . ”_[2959-i] [Two solemn - looking police officers]_{1843-two solemn - looking police officers} force a smile . “ Are [you]_{1843-two solemn - looking police officers} [Emily Foster]_186-jameson ? ”_[2959-i] “ Yes . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i heart begins to race . “ Can [we]_3243-we talk to [you]_{1843-two solemn - looking police officers} for a moment , please ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stand back . “ Yes , please come in . ”_[2959-i] “ [We]_3243-we would like to talk to [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson , please . ”_{[1843-two solemn - looking police officers]} [They]_{1843-two solemn - looking police officers} look around [[my]_2959-i apartment]_{385-new york} and then turn [their]_{1843-two solemn - looking police officers} attention back to [me]_2959-i . “ Is [he]_186-jameson [here]_{385-new york} ? ”_{[1843-two solemn - looking police officers]} “ No , [he]_186-jameson is n’t . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i feel [my]_2959-i heart begin to pump harder in [my]_2959-i chest . “ What ’s this about ? ”_[2959-i] “ [He]_186-jameson ’s wanted for questioning in regards to an assault earlier this evening . ”_{[1843-two solemn - looking police officers]} “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ [Gabriel Ferrara]_2430-tristan was attacked tonight outside [a restaurant by [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles}]_{3244-a restaurant by mr. miles} . A warrant has been issued for [his]_2430-tristan arrest . ”_[2959-i] “ Is [he]_2430-tristan all right ? ”_[2959-i] “ [Mr. Ferrara]_2430-tristan has significant facial injuries and has been taken to [the hospital]_{1306-the hospital} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i put [my]_2959-i hand over [my]_2959-i mouth in horror . “ What happened ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ [Mr. Ferrara]_2430-tristan was getting into [a car]_{1349-a car} when [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} approached [him]_2430-tristan in the dark . A fight broke out , and [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} assaulted [him]_2430-tristan . ”_[2959-i] “ Where was this ? ”_[2959-i] “ Out the front of [Bryant Park]_{40-bryant park} , opposite [Lucina]_220-lucina ’s . ”_[2959-i] “ Oh [my]_2959-i God , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ Is [Jameson]_186-jameson all right ? ”_[2959-i] “ [Witnesses]_{3247-witnesses} say [he]_186-jameson ran off through [the park]_{40-bryant park} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i close [my]_2959-i eyes in relief . . . thank [God]_0-aaron . “ [You]_0-aaron have [the wrong person]_{3248-the wrong person} , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer . “ [Jameson]_186-jameson would never attack [someone]_2326-someone . [He]_186-jameson ’s [the CEO of [a company]_{3250-a company}]_186-jameson , not [a pub brawler]_{3251-a pub brawler} . ”_[2959-i] That ’s a complete lie ; [I]_2959-i know [Jameson]_186-jameson would love to beat [Ferrara]_2430-tristan to a pulp . . . “ [I]_186-jameson do n’t know where [he]_186-jameson is , ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i assert with renewed determination . “ Can [we]_3252-we search [[your]_3253-your apartment]_{2627-the apartment} ? ”_{[1845-the policeman]} [the policeman]_{1845-the policeman} asks . “ Of course . [He]_186-jameson ’s not here , though . ”_{[1845-the policeman]} [I]_2959-i stand back to allow [them]_1846-them access . [The police]_{368-the police} search [the apartment]_{2627-the apartment} and come back to [me]_2959-i in [the living area]_{765-the living area} . [They]_{368-the police} hand [me]_2959-i a business card . “ As soon as [you]_3254-you hear from [him]_186-jameson , [you]_3254-you need to call [us]_3255-us . If [you]_3254-you do n’t , [you]_3254-you may be charged with obstruction of justice . Hiding [a person of interest from [authorities]_{3257-authorities}]_{3256-a person of interest from authorities} is a very serious offense . ”_{[368-the police]} “ Okay . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i storm to the door and open it in a rush . “ Good night . ”_{[1850-the officers]} [The officers]_{1850-the officers} leave , and [I]_2959-i close the door behind [them]_{1850-the officers} with a slam . [I]_2959-i put [my]_2959-i two hands over [my]_2959-i mouth in horror and dial the number . [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s phone rings out . . . [he]_186-jameson would n’t answer [my]_2959-i call anyway . “ Damn it . ”_{[186-jameson]} In a panic , [I]_2959-i call [Tristan]_2430-tristan . “ Hello . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [Tristan]_2430-tristan , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer . “ Do [you]_3254-you know where [Jameson]_186-jameson is ? ”_[2959-i] “ What ’s wrong ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson says . “ [The police]_{368-the police} were just [here]_{385-new york} , and [Jameson]_186-jameson apparently assaulted [Ferrara]_2430-tristan . [They]_{368-the police} ’ve issued a warrant for [his]_186-jameson arrest . Do [you]_3254-you know where [he]_186-jameson is ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ What ? ”_[2959-i] “ [He]_186-jameson ’s not answering [my]_2959-i calls , and [witnesses]_{3247-witnesses} said [he]_186-jameson ran off across [the park]_{40-bryant park} . ”_[2959-i] “ What the fuck ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ What do [I]_2959-i do ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i ’ll try calling [him]_186-jameson and call [you]_1851-you back . ”_[2959-i] “ Okay . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i hang up and begin to pace . . . where are [you]_1851-you ? Moments later [Tristan]_2430-tristan calls back . “ [He]_186-jameson ’s not answering . [I]_2430-tristan ’ll come over . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ Thank [you]_1851-you . ”_{[2430-tristan]} An hour later [Tristan]_2430-tristan and [I]_2959-i walk through [Bryant Park]_{40-bryant park} . [We]_1852-we have n’t talked other than about finding [Jameson]_186-jameson . [He]_186-jameson ’s angry with [me]_2959-i about [Jake]_108-jay and obviously does n’t want to discuss it . [I]_2959-i ’m angry with [me]_2959-i . It ’s one o’clock in the morning , and now [I]_2959-i ’m getting frantic . [My]_2959-i eyes roam over [the park]_{40-bryant park} in the darkness . “ Where could [he]_186-jameson be ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ [I]_186-jameson do n’t know . Try calling [him]_186-jameson again , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson says . [I]_2959-i dial [his]_186-jameson number and keep walking through [the darkened park]_{40-bryant park} when [we]_1852-we hear something . [Tristan]_2430-tristan ’s eyes widen , and [he]_186-jameson holds up [his]_186-jameson hand . “ Shh , listen . ”_{[186-jameson]} From the darkness , [we]_1852-we can hear a faint ringtone . It goes silent , and [I]_2959-i redial [his]_186-jameson number . [We]_1852-we both look around frantically , and then [we]_1852-we see the white glow as the screen lights up . “ Here . ”_[1852-we] [I]_2959-i run over to the side and see a phone lying in the grass . [My]_2959-i eyes widen in horror as [Tristan]_2430-tristan picks it up . [He]_2430-tristan swipes it on and puts in the code , and the screen lights up . [His]_2430-tristan eyes rise to meet [mine]_2959-i . “ It ’s [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s phone . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [We]_1852-we both look up across [the darkened park]_{40-bryant park} as a sense of fear sweeps through [me]_2959-i . “ What the hell has happened to [him]_186-jameson ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . It ’s four o’clock in the morning , and [Tristan]_2430-tristan and [I]_2959-i are frantic . [We]_1852-we ’ve walked for hours . [Alan]_246-alan , [Elliot]_140-elliot , and [Christopher]_{141-christopher} are all out looking for [Jameson]_186-jameson . “ [He]_186-jameson ’s probably just hiding out from [the police]_{368-the police} [somewhere]_{3263-somewhere} . [He]_186-jameson ’ll be fine , ”_[246-alan] [Tristan]_2430-tristan tries to comfort [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i ’m in full - blown tears now ; there ’s no hiding [my]_2959-i distress . “ This is all [my]_2959-i fault , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper as [we]_1852-we walk . “ If [I]_2959-i did n’t go to that setup , none of this would have happened . ”_[2959-i] “ What do [you]_2959-i mean , setup ? ”_[2959-i] “ [Jake]_108-jay told [me]_2959-i that [he]_186-jameson had information on a story that [Ferrara]_2430-tristan was publishing the next day about [Jameson]_186-jameson and that [he]_186-jameson would tell [me]_2959-i out of work . [I]_2959-i did n’t want to worry [Jameson]_186-jameson , so [I]_2959-i lied and went to meet [him]_186-jameson . [He]_186-jameson just wanted to get [me]_2959-i alone , and [he]_186-jameson kissed [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i slapped [him]_186-jameson across the face and left , and then the next day . . . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug . “ [You]_186-jameson saw the pictures . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i frowns . “ So [you]_186-jameson were n’t seeing [Jake]_108-jay ? ”_[2959-i] “ No , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . “ [I]_2959-i ’m in love with fucking [Jameson]_186-jameson , [[you]_186-jameson idiot]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sob . “ And [he]_2959-i wo n’t let [me]_2959-i explain . ”_[2959-i] “ Fucking hell , what a mess . ”_[2959-i] [His]_2959-i phone rings , and [he]_2959-i quickly answers . “ Hello . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i listens . “ Yes . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i listens some more . “ Is [he]_2959-i all right ? ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i gasps . [He]_2959-i puts [his]_2959-i hand over [his]_2959-i chest . “ Thank God . ”_[2959-i] “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i mouth . “ Thank [you]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i ’m on [my]_2959-i way . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i hangs up . “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ [Jameson]_186-jameson is in [the hospital]_{1306-the hospital} . ”_[2959-i] “ What happened ? ”_[2959-i] “ [He]_2959-i was hit by [a car]_{1349-a car} . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i hands fly over [my]_2959-i mouth in horror . “ [He]_2959-i ’s okay — just a concussion . ”_[2959-i] “ Oh , thank God . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i ’m going to go get [him]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i ’m coming , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i demand . “ [Em]_186-jameson . . . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i pauses . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t think that ’s a good idea . [The paps]_{3266-the paps} will be everywhere after this Ferrara bullshit , and [Jameson]_186-jameson does n’t need more publicity . Who knows what [reporters]_{2377-reporters} are at [the hospital]_{1306-the hospital} ? [Jameson]_186-jameson specifically wants [you]_3268-you kept out of the spotlight . Let [me]_2959-i talk to [him]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i ’ll call [you]_3268-you when [we]_3269-we get [home]_2289-home . ”_[2959-i] Hope blooms in [my]_2959-i chest . Is [he]_2959-i trying to protect [me]_2959-i ? “ But [I]_221-empathy did n’t do anything wrong , [Tristan]_2430-tristan . [I]_221-empathy want to see [him]_2959-i . ”_{[221-empathy]} [Empathy]_221-empathy wins , and [he]_2959-i takes [me]_2959-i in [his]_2959-i arms . “ Let [me]_2959-i get [him]_2959-i [home]_2289-home safely , and [I]_2959-i ’ll call [you]_2430-tristan . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i pulls back and holds [me]_2959-i by the arms as [he]_2959-i studies [me]_2959-i . “ [I]_2959-i promise [I]_2959-i ’ll call [you]_2430-tristan . [I]_2959-i ’ll drop [you]_2430-tristan [home]_2289-home and then sort [him]_2959-i out , and then [I]_2959-i ’ll call [you]_2430-tristan . [You]_2430-tristan have [my]_2959-i word . ”_[2959-i] [His]_2959-i eyes search [mine]_2959-i . “ Okay . ”_[1853-we] [We]_1853-we walk for a moment in silence . “ [I]_2959-i ’m going to find out who stole the money if it ’s the last thing [I]_2959-i do , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ [Emily]_186-jameson , that ’s a bad idea . Leave it to [the detectives]_{3271-the detectives} . [You]_186-jameson ’re tired and emotional . Let ’s get [you]_186-jameson [home]_2289-home . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i nod , knowing that [he]_2959-i is right about everything and hating it even more . [Jameson]_186-jameson [I]_2959-i watch [the nurse]_{1308-the nurse} take [my]_2959-i pulse as [she]_{1308-the nurse} holds [my]_2959-i hand , and [I]_2959-i inhale deeply . [She]_{1308-the nurse} ’s older and motherly , the kind [you]_{1855-young man} want looking after [you]_{1855-young man} . “ How ’s the headache ? ”_{[1308-the nurse]} [she]_{1308-the nurse} asks . “ Still there . ”_{[1308-the nurse]} [She]_{1308-the nurse} smiles and gets [her]_{1308-the nurse} flashlight and shines it in [my]_2959-i eyes to inspect [[my]_2959-i pupils]_{1856-my pupils} . “ [You]_{1855-young man} have a serious concussion . [You]_{1855-young man} ’re very lucky to be alive , [young man]_{1855-young man} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i hear chatter from outside , and [Tristan]_2430-tristan appears at the door . “ Hey . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ Hi . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smirk at the worry on [his]_2430-tristan face . [He]_2430-tristan rushes to [my]_2959-i side . “ Are [you]_{1855-young man} all right ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ [I]_2430-tristan ’m fine . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ [He]_2430-tristan is not fine , ”_{[1308-the nurse]} [the nurse]_{1308-the nurse} interrupts . “ [He]_2430-tristan got hit by [a car]_{1349-a car} . [He]_2430-tristan could have been killed . As it is , [he]_2430-tristan has a very serious concussion . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan drags [his]_2430-tristan hand down [his]_2430-tristan face . “ [Jesus]_107-jesus . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ [He]_2430-tristan ’s staying in for the night , and as long as all [his]_2430-tristan preliminary tests come back clear in the morning , [he]_2430-tristan can go [home]_2289-home . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ Okay . . . thanks . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan slumps into a seat beside the bed . “ [I]_{1308-the nurse} ’ll be back in an hour with some pain medication . ”_{[1308-the nurse]} [She]_{1308-the nurse} smiles . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t need it , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reply . “ [I]_2959-i ’ll be back anyway . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes , and [she]_{1308-the nurse} leaves [us]_1858-we alone . “ Sorry , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ Fucking hell , [Jay]_108-jay , [we]_1858-we ’ve been out of [our]_1858-we head with worry . Searching for [you]_108-jay all night . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i puff air into [my]_2959-i cheeks . “ [The police]_{368-the police} came to [Emily]_186-jameson ’s , and then [she]_186-jameson called [me]_2959-i , and then [we]_1858-we found [your]_186-jameson phone in [Bryant Park]_{40-bryant park} . ”_[2959-i] “ [Emily]_186-jameson ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ Why did [you]_186-jameson involve [her]_186-jameson ? ”_[2959-i] “ [She]_186-jameson ’s frantic , [Jameson]_186-jameson . [She]_186-jameson wanted to help find [you]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes . “ [I]_2959-i seriously doubt that . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_186-jameson know , [I]_2959-i do n’t think [she]_186-jameson is on with that fuckwit [Jake]_108-jay . This was a misunderstanding . ”_[2959-i] “ Shut up , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i dismiss [him]_2959-i . “ No . [You]_186-jameson shut up . Why wo n’t [you]_186-jameson even talk to [her]_186-jameson ? ”_[2959-i] “ Because [she]_186-jameson lied to [me]_2959-i . Straight to [my]_2959-i face about seeing [another man]_{526-another man} . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i watches [me]_2959-i . “ And [I]_2959-i do n’t need that fucking shit in [my]_2959-i life . [I]_2959-i have enough going on , if [you]_186-jameson did n’t notice . ”_[2959-i] “ [She]_186-jameson wants to see [you]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] “ Yeah , well , [I]_2959-i do n’t want to see [her]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . “ Then [you]_186-jameson need to end it with [her]_186-jameson ; [she]_186-jameson ’s frantic . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i screw up [my]_2959-i face in annoyance . “ Just fucking go [home]_2289-home . [I]_2959-i ’ll get [Alan]_246-alan to pick [me]_2959-i up tomorrow . ”_[2959-i] “ Why wo n’t [you]_186-jameson even talk about this ? ”_{[1308-the nurse]} “ Because this is none of [your]_186-jameson business . [Emily]_186-jameson and [I]_{1308-the nurse} are over . It was over the moment [she]_{1308-the nurse} started lying to [me]_{1308-the nurse} . ”_{[1308-the nurse]} [The nurse]_{1308-the nurse} reappears . “ [I]_2959-i ’m tired , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i announce . [She]_{1308-the nurse} smiles . “ Yes , okay . ”_{[1308-the nurse]} [She]_{1308-the nurse} turns [her]_{1308-the nurse} attention to [Tristan]_2430-tristan . “ [We]_3278-we will call [you]_2430-tristan in the morning when [he]_2430-tristan ’s ready for release . ”_{[1308-the nurse]} “ Yeah , okay , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan replies . [His]_2430-tristan eyes hold [mine]_2430-tristan , and [I]_2959-i know that [he]_2430-tristan knows [I]_2959-i ’m not tired at all . [The nurse]_{1308-the nurse} goes into [the bathroom]_{300-the bathroom} . “ And what am [I]_2430-tristan supposed to tell [Emily]_186-jameson ? [She]_186-jameson ’s waiting for [my]_2430-tristan call , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [he]_2430-tristan whispers angrily . “ [I]_2430-tristan do n’t give a fuck what [you]_2430-tristan tell [her]_186-jameson — [she]_186-jameson ’s not [my]_2430-tristan problem . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan drags [his]_2430-tristan hand down [his]_2430-tristan face . “ [You]_2430-tristan ’re [a selfish son of [a bitch]_{2519-a bitch}]_{3279-a selfish son of a bitch} sometimes . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ And [your]_2430-tristan point is ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan stares at [me]_2959-i for an extended time . “ See [you]_2430-tristan tomorrow . ”_{[186-jameson]} [Emily]_186-jameson [My]_2959-i phone dances across the coffee table , and [I]_2959-i pick it up in a rush . “ [He]_2430-tristan ’s okay . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan sighs . “ Thank God . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [I]_2959-i close [my]_2959-i eyes in relief . “ Can [I]_2959-i see [him]_2430-tristan ? ”_[2959-i] “ [He]_2430-tristan has a bad concussion and is going to be in [the hospital]_{1306-the hospital} for a few days . ”_[2959-i] “ What ? ”_[2959-i] “ [He]_2430-tristan said it ’s best that [you]_2430-tristan do n’t come down ; [he]_2430-tristan does n’t want the media circus . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes fill with tears . Damn it . It feels like all [I]_2959-i do is cry at the moment . “ [He]_2430-tristan ’s sleeping now . ”_[2959-i] “ Did [he]_2430-tristan say anything ? About [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pause as [I]_2959-i try to articulate [my]_2959-i thoughts . “ How do [I]_2959-i get through to [him]_2430-tristan , [Tristan]_2430-tristan ? ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i exhales heavily . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t know . [He]_2959-i ’s got a lot of shit going on , [Em]_3282-em . [I]_2959-i do n’t think [he]_2959-i ’s thinking straight at the moment . [I]_2959-i ’ll try and talk to [him]_2959-i tomorrow . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i screw up [my]_2959-i face in tears . “ Okay , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ Can [you]_0-aaron call [me]_0-aaron . . . please ? ”_[0-aaron] [God]_0-aaron , [I]_2959-i sound like [the world]_{249-the world} ’s biggest loser , but [I]_2959-i do n’t know what else to do . “ [I]_2959-i ’m so worried about [him]_1862-he , [Tristan]_2430-tristan . ”_[2959-i] “ [We]_3283-we all are , [Em]_186-jameson . [I]_0-aaron ’ll call [you]_2430-tristan tomorrow . Just try and get some sleep . ”_[0-aaron] “ Okay , good night . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i hang up and get into the shower , and tears of relief begin to fall . At least [he]_1862-he ’s okay , and tomorrow is another day . [He]_1862-he will come back to [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i know [he]_1862-he will . [I]_2959-i slide down in [my]_2959-i chair as [I]_2959-i peer across [the street]_{550-the street} . [I]_2959-i ’m on Operation Spies Like [Us]_1864-us . [Hayden]_266-jim is [my]_2959-i stalking subject . [I]_2959-i do n’t know why , but [I]_2959-i ca n’t let this go with [him]_1862-he . [I]_2959-i called in sick to work . [I]_2959-i figure this story may be the most important story of [my]_2959-i entire career to crack . [I]_2959-i still have n’t spoken to [Jameson]_186-jameson , and with every day that passes , [I]_2959-i lose a little more hope . It ’s seven o’clock in the evening . [I]_2959-i ’m wearing a blonde wig and dark glasses , and [I]_2959-i have even rented [a car]_{1349-a car} . [I]_2959-i ’ve been sitting [here]_{385-new york} for eight hours , with no sign of stupid [Hayden]_266-jim . [He]_266-jim lives in [a busy part of [town]_2456-town]_{1867-a busy part of town} in [a nice apartment block]_{1869-a nice apartment block} ; [the street]_{550-the street} is bustling , and [people]_248-people are everywhere . [I]_2959-i have to concentrate on not missing anything . Damn it , come out already . [I]_2959-i ’ve eaten all [my]_2959-i snacks . [I]_2959-i ’m hungry and dying to go to [the bathroom]_{300-the bathroom} , but damn it , [I]_2959-i want a lead or something . . . anything . . . throw [me]_2959-i a bone here . [I]_2959-i look down [the darkened street]_{550-the street} and back up the other way . [God]_0-aaron , [Hayden]_266-jim ’s probably on [his]_266-jim way to [Istanbul]_41-istanbul by now . That ’s what [I]_2959-i would do if [I]_2959-i got fired from [my]_2959-i job for stealing . Although apparently , [he]_266-jim has no idea [he]_266-jim ’s still being investigated . [He]_266-jim thinks being fired is as far as it ’s going to go . [I]_2959-i lie back in the chair and let out a deflated breath . [I]_2959-i glance over [my]_2959-i shoulder and see [Hayden]_266-jim stopped and talking to [a woman on [the sidewalk]_{724-the sidewalk}]_{1873-a woman on the sidewalk} . Shit . [I]_2959-i scoot down in the chair . [They]_1875-they must be getting back from somewhere . [They]_1875-they seem to be deep in a serious conversation , and [she]_{1873-a woman on the sidewalk} has a large bag over [her]_{1873-a woman on the sidewalk} shoulder . [I]_2959-i take out [my]_2959-i phone and snap a picture of [the two of [them]_{2419-the two of them}]_{2419-the two of them} . [I]_2959-i zoom in and take a few shots . Who is [she]_{1873-a woman on the sidewalk} ? Is that [[his]_266-jim girlfriend]_76-woman ? [I]_2959-i text [Aaron]_0-aaron and [Molly]_198-molly in a group chat and send [them]_{2419-the two of them} the picture . Do [you]_1878-you know [this girl]_76-woman ? [I]_2959-i keep watching as [they]_{2419-the two of them} continue to talk . For five minutes , [I]_2959-i watch [them]_{2419-the two of them} , and then [Molly]_198-molly texts back . [I]_2959-i ’ve seen [her]_76-woman before , but [I]_2959-i do n’t know where from ? Does [she]_76-woman work in a café or something ? ? Hmm . [I]_2959-i text back . [I]_2959-i have no idea ? A text comes back from [Aaron]_0-aaron . Yes , [she]_76-woman used to work for [Miles Media]_{14-miles media} . [My]_2959-i eyes widen , and [I]_2959-i text back . How long ago ? [He]_0-aaron writes back . No idea , [I]_2959-i have n’t seen [her]_76-woman for a while though . Shit . [I]_2959-i send the photo to [Tristan]_2430-tristan and text [him]_2430-tristan . [Tristan]_2430-tristan , [this girl]_76-woman apparently worked for [Miles Media]_{14-miles media} , can [you]_1879-you find out who [she]_76-woman is from HR , please ? A reply immediately bounces back . Sure thing , are [you]_1879-you okay ? [I]_2959-i reply . Yes , [I]_2959-i ’m on operation stakeout . [He]_2430-tristan texts back . Do [you]_1879-you want [me]_2959-i to come and help [you]_1879-you ? [I]_2959-i smirk . [I]_2959-i thought [you]_1879-you thought this was a bad idea . [He]_2430-tristan replies . [I]_2959-i do , [I]_2959-i do n’t want [you]_1879-you in danger . [I]_2959-i text back . No , can [you]_1879-you just text [HR]_80-hr for [me]_2959-i now , please ? [He]_2430-tristan replies . Ok . [I]_2959-i wait and wait and wait , and finally a text comes back . [Her]_1880-her name is [Lara Aspin]_{125-lara aspin} . [HR]_80-hr are searching for [her]_1880-her job title in the morning , [I]_2959-i ’ll keep [you]_1879-you posted . [I]_2959-i smile , excited that [I]_2959-i at least have a little lead . [I]_2959-i have no idea what it means , but [I]_2959-i guess it ’s something . [I]_2959-i text back . Thanks . [I]_2959-i check [my]_2959-i phone . . . no missed calls . [I]_2959-i turn [the car]_{369-the car} on and pull out into the traffic , and a sense of dread begins to hang over [me]_2959-i . Nighttime is the worst ; [my]_2959-i bed without [Jameson]_186-jameson is cold . There ’s a void where [he]_186-jameson ’s supposed to be . [My]_2959-i heart is aching . [I]_2959-i ’m losing hope for [us]_1882-us . . . [I]_2959-i miss [him]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i lie on the couch and stare at the television . The cushion beneath [my]_2959-i head is wet with tears . It ’s been three days since [Jameson]_186-jameson was hit by [a car]_{1349-a car} . Six days since [I]_2959-i ’ve seen [him]_186-jameson . . . [I]_2959-i ca n’t eat . [I]_2959-i ca n’t sleep . [I]_2959-i ’m in hell . To make matters worse , [I]_2959-i embarrassed [myself]_2959-i last night by going to [[his]_186-jameson apartment]_{361-the building} and crying into the security camera , begging for [him]_186-jameson to let [me]_2959-i in . [He]_186-jameson did n’t , and after half an hour [[his]_186-jameson doorman]_{1885-his doorman} ushered [me]_2959-i out of [the building]_{361-the building} . [I]_2959-i ’m ashamed . [I]_2959-i do n’t know what to do . . . [he]_186-jameson wo n’t see [me]_2959-i ; [he]_186-jameson wo n’t speak to [me]_2959-i . All the love and laughter [we]_1886-we shared , reduced to nothing . It ’s like [I]_2959-i never meant anything to [him]_186-jameson . . . maybe [I]_2959-i did n’t ? [I]_2959-i knew [he]_186-jameson had a reputation for being cold , but this . . . this coldness is next level . How could [he]_186-jameson watch [me]_2959-i on camera sob and beg and not even let [me]_2959-i in ? [I]_2959-i pick up [my]_2959-i phone and text [him]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i miss [you]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i stare at [my]_2959-i phone , and then [I]_2959-i see the dots . [I]_2959-i sit up . . . [he]_186-jameson ’s typing something . [My]_2959-i heart begins to race . This is the first time . [I]_2959-i watch the dots roll as [I]_2959-i wait . . . and then [they]_1887-they stop . Wait . . . what ? Where is the text ? [I]_2959-i wait . The dots start again , and [I]_2959-i smile through tears . . . yes . [He]_186-jameson ’s replying . [I]_2959-i wait and wait . Then the dots stop once more . “ Send the text , damn it , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . [I]_2959-i wait , and nothing comes through for half an hour . [My]_2959-i anger starts to bubble . How dare [he]_186-jameson not even acknowledge [me]_2959-i ? Who the fuck does [this asshole]_186-jameson think [he]_186-jameson is ? [I]_2959-i angrily text back . At least have the guts to say what [you]_1888-you want to . A text immediately bounces back . Move on , [I]_2959-i have . [I]_2959-i read the message and then read the message again through tears . . . what ? Just like that . . . move on ? [Fucking asshole]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i get up and throw [my]_2959-i phone as hard as [I]_2959-i can . The screen smashes on the coffee table . [I]_2959-i ’m so fucking furious that [I]_2959-i have absolutely no control of the situation . [I]_2959-i storm into [the bathroom]_{300-the bathroom} , [I]_2959-i get under the shower , and , unable to help it , [I]_2959-i cry . . . and cry . . . and cry . Howling sobs , and [my]_2959-i chest is heaving hard as [I]_2959-i hold [myself]_2959-i up against the tiles . Tears of anger , tears of frustration , tears of heartbreak . [I]_2959-i knew it was coming . . . deep down , all along , [I]_2959-i knew it was coming , but holy fuck . . . it hurts . [Jameson]_186-jameson [I]_2959-i drop [my]_2959-i shoulders in the back of [[my]_2959-i limo]_{772-my limo} as [I]_2959-i steel [myself]_2959-i for what [I]_2959-i ’m about to do . “ Are [you]_246-alan sure about this ? ”_[246-alan] [Alan]_246-alan asks as [he]_246-alan opens the door . “ Yes . It is what it is ; [I]_246-alan ’m not hiding any longer , ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i say as [I]_2959-i climb out of [the car]_{369-the car} . [I]_2959-i look up at [the [New York]_{385-new york} Police Department]_{1892-the new york police department} sign above the door , and [I]_2959-i walk through . [The policeman]_{1845-the policeman} at the front desk smiles . “ Can [I]_{1845-the policeman} help [you]_{1845-the policeman} , [sir]_{1845-the policeman} ? ”_{[1845-the policeman]} “ Yes , [my]_{1845-the policeman} name is [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson , and [I]_{1845-the policeman} would like to hand [myself]_{1845-the policeman} in . ”_{[1845-the policeman]} [The policeman]_{1845-the policeman} ’s face falters . “ [You]_{1845-the policeman} are wanted ? ”_{[1845-the policeman]} “ [I]_{1845-the policeman} was involved in a fistfight with [a man named [Gabriel Ferrara]_2430-tristan]_{3284-a man named gabriel ferrara} and then went to [the hospital]_{1306-the hospital} . [I]_{1845-the policeman} was unaware until late last night that [you]_{1845-the policeman} were looking for [me]_{1845-the policeman} . [My]_{1845-the policeman} apologies for taking so long to get here . ”_{[1845-the policeman]} [The policeman]_{1845-the policeman} smiles . “ Thank [you]_{1845-the policeman} for coming in . ”_{[1845-the policeman]} [He]_{1845-the policeman} opens a door at the side of reception . “ Please come this way . ”_{[1845-the policeman]} Five hours later , [I]_2959-i stand on the pavement outside [the Ferrara building]_{1894-the ferrara building} and look up to [the top floors]_{1895-the top floors} . [I]_2959-i dial a number that [I]_2959-i ’ve had for years but have never called . “ [Gabriel Ferrara]_2430-tristan , ”_[2959-i] the deep voice answers . “ It ’s [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i ’m out in front of [[your]_2430-tristan building]_{1894-the ferrara building} . Get down here now . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i hang up and inhale deeply . [I]_2959-i lean [my]_2959-i behind on [[my]_2959-i limo]_{772-my limo} . After having spent the last five hours in [the police station]_{2533-the police station} , [I]_2959-i am not in the mood to wait for [this prick]_{1898-this prick} , but [I]_2959-i need to say what [I]_2959-i need to say , or it ’s going to keep festering inside of [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i told [the police]_{368-the police} that [my]_2959-i punch on [Ferrara]_2430-tristan was self - defense and that [they]_{368-the police} need to check the security footage . [I]_2959-i ’m not sure if it will stick , but it will give [me]_2959-i some time . [The police]_{368-the police} were actually okay and told [me]_2959-i that seeing [he]_2430-tristan flicked the cigar at [me]_2959-i first , [I]_2959-i will probably only be charged with common assault and given a good behavior bond . That , [I]_2959-i can deal with . [Gabriel Ferrara]_2430-tristan appears through the front door , flanked by [four security guards]_{1900-four security guards} . [His]_2430-tristan eye is black and [his]_2430-tristan cheekbone swollen . [I]_2959-i smirk as [I]_2959-i see [his]_2430-tristan fucked - up face . “ [You]_2430-tristan look like shit . ”_[2959-i] “ Yeah , well , [a madman]_{3286-a madman} attacked [me]_2430-tristan , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [he]_2430-tristan mutters dryly . [I]_2959-i step forward as [my]_2959-i anger resurfaces . “ [I]_2430-tristan know what [you]_2430-tristan ’re doing . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan glares at [me]_2959-i . “ [You]_2430-tristan do n’t scare [me]_2430-tristan . It ’s laughable how underhanded [you]_2430-tristan have become . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan rolls [his]_2430-tristan eyes . “ Fuck off , [Miles]_186-jameson . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ If [you]_2430-tristan think that underhanded criminal behavior can take down [Miles Media]_{14-miles media} , [you]_2430-tristan can think again , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sneer . [He]_2430-tristan narrows [his]_2430-tristan eyes . “ [Miles Media]_{68-miles media} has been [the market leader for thirty years]_{68-miles media} , and [we]_3287-we will continue to dominate . Tell [me]_2430-tristan , does [[your]_2430-tristan father]_{3288-your father} know what [you]_2430-tristan ’ve stooped to ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan lifts [his]_2430-tristan chin in defiance . “ Criminal behavior — what the hell are [you]_2430-tristan talking about ? That hit and run has left [you]_2430-tristan delusional . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ [You]_2430-tristan know exactly what [I]_1901-i ’m talking about . ”_[1901-i] [We]_1901-i glare at each other ; hate hangs in the air like poisonous pollution . “ [I]_2959-i know what [you]_2430-tristan ’re doing , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [His]_2430-tristan eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ And as soon as [I]_2430-tristan prove it , [I]_2430-tristan ’m going to fry [your]_2430-tristan fucking ass in court . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ [I]_2959-i ’d like to see [you]_2430-tristan try . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_2430-tristan as [I]_2959-i remember how good it felt to hit [this fucker]_{1902-this fucker} . “ Is [your]_2430-tristan cheekbone broken ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan glares at [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i know it is . “ Let [me]_2959-i tell [you]_2430-tristan this — disrespect [Emily Foster]_186-jameson again , and next time . . . [I]_2959-i wo n’t just break [your]_2430-tristan cheekbone . [I]_2959-i will kill [you]_2430-tristan , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sneer . [He]_2430-tristan raises [his]_2430-tristan eyebrow as if surprised by [my]_2959-i statement . “ Is that a threat , [Miles]_{68-miles media} ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ That ’s a fucking promise , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i growl . “ Leave [her]_{1906-that asshole down} out of this . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i turn and get into [[my]_2959-i limo]_{772-my limo} , and [we]_1904-we pull away . [I]_2959-i watch [Gabriel Ferrara]_2430-tristan storm back into [the building]_{361-the building} , flanked by [his]_2430-tristan security . The day [I]_2959-i bring [that asshole down]_{1906-that asshole down} is going to be a sweet victory . [I]_2959-i run down [the street]_{550-the street} in the dark . It ’s just midnight . [I]_2959-i have n’t been [here]_{385-new york} in a while , and for some reason , tonight [I]_2959-i need to be . [[Emily]_186-jameson ’s apartment building]_{361-the building} . [I]_2959-i count the windows until [I]_2959-i get to [[her]_186-jameson apartment]_{361-the building} , and [I]_2959-i stare up at it . What ’s [she]_186-jameson doing ? Is [she]_186-jameson missing [me]_2959-i as much as [I]_2959-i ’m missing [her]_186-jameson ? [I]_2959-i get a vision of ringing the doorbell and asking to come up , and [we]_1909-we would hug , and [I]_2959-i would feel happy . . . like [I]_2959-i used to . But then [I]_2959-i remember the hurt [I]_2959-i felt last week when [she]_186-jameson lied to [me]_2959-i , the out - of - control feeling that [I]_2959-i have whenever [I]_2959-i ’m with [her]_186-jameson . The way [[my]_2959-i enemies]_{1910-my enemies} are using [her]_186-jameson to get to [me]_2959-i , the way [she]_186-jameson ’s handing [them]_{1910-my enemies} the ammunition like candy . And [I]_2959-i know that nothing could bring [me]_2959-i undone . . . except [her]_186-jameson . [She]_186-jameson ’s [my]_2959-i only weakness . And weakness is something that [I]_2959-i ca n’t afford to have . Not now , not ever . [I]_2959-i stare up at [[her]_186-jameson apartment]_{1905-her apartment} for a long time , and then with a heavy heart , [I]_2959-i turn and begin the depressing run [home]_2289-home . [I]_2959-i ’ve never been so alone . [Emily]_186-jameson [I]_2959-i stare at the coffee in front of [me]_2959-i ; the thought of drinking it turns [my]_2959-i stomach . It ’s been four days since [I]_2959-i got the dreaded four - word text from [Jameson]_186-jameson . Move on , [I]_2959-i have . Four days is a long time to walk around with a broken heart . . . it ’s weak and barely clinging to life . [I]_2959-i keep hoping and praying that [he]_186-jameson ’s going to come back with a grand gesture and hold [his]_186-jameson arms out , and [I]_2959-i run into them , and this nightmare will all be forgotten . If only that were true . [My]_2959-i mind is clouded with memories of [the man [I]_2959-i thought [I]_2959-i knew]_{1913-the man i thought i knew} . The hole in [my]_2959-i life seems so large , and [I]_2959-i just do n’t understand how [you]_1914-you can fall so hard in love with [someone]_2326-someone in such a short period of time . [I]_2959-i should have stayed with [Robbie]_56-robbie , because in hindsight , [Robbie]_56-robbie was safe . There was never a chance of [him]_56-robbie hurting [me]_2959-i this deeply . . . but then , [I]_2959-i would n’t have met [Jameson]_186-jameson and found out what it was like to have this all - consuming love inside of [me]_2959-i . No matter how it ended , [I]_2959-i would n’t trade that feeling for anything . Even if it was only [mine]_2959-i for just a little while . The only thing keeping [me]_2959-i going at the moment is [Molly]_198-molly and [Aaron]_0-aaron . [They]_1916-they ’ve been wonderful . Cheering [me]_2959-i on from the sidelines , reminding [me]_2959-i of why [I]_2959-i came to [New York]_{385-new york} in the first place . It would be so easy to run [home]_2289-home right now with [my]_2959-i tail between [my]_2959-i legs . “ Are [you]_{3289-a self - absorbed fucking asshole} going to eat the rest of that ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly gestures to [my]_2959-i half - eaten sandwich . [I]_2959-i crinkle up [my]_2959-i nose . “ No , do [you]_{3289-a self - absorbed fucking asshole} want it ? ”_[2959-i] “ Just forget [you]_{3289-a self - absorbed fucking asshole} ever met [him]_{3289-a self - absorbed fucking asshole} , [Em]_186-jameson . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron sighs . “ [No man]_{3290-no man} is worth this heartache . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i force out a weak smile . “ [He]_{3289-a self - absorbed fucking asshole} ’ll come back , [Aaron]_0-aaron . [I]_2959-i know [he]_{3289-a self - absorbed fucking asshole} will . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_{3289-a self - absorbed fucking asshole} know [you]_{3289-a self - absorbed fucking asshole} keep saying that , [Em]_186-jameson , but where is [the fucking asshole]_186-jameson ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly replies . “ [He]_{3289-a self - absorbed fucking asshole} ’s just . . . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug as [I]_2959-i try to articulate [my]_2959-i thoughts . “ Lost at the moment . ”_[2959-i] “ No , what [he]_{3289-a self - absorbed fucking asshole} is is [a self - absorbed fucking asshole]_{3289-a self - absorbed fucking asshole} , ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly huffs . “ Good riddance , [I]_198-molly say ; [you]_198-molly dodged a bullet . ”_[198-molly] There is absolutely no love lost between [Aaron]_0-aaron and [Molly]_198-molly as far as [Jameson]_186-jameson is concerned . “ Maybe . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sigh sadly . “ Come on ; [we]_1918-we have to get back . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron stands . “ Lunch break is over . ”_[0-aaron] [We]_1918-we make [our]_1918-we way back out onto [the street]_{550-the street} and are walking toward [the Miles Media building]_{521-the miles media building} when [Molly]_198-molly stops on the spot . “ Fuck , ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly whispers . “ What ? ”_[198-molly] “ Look . ”_[1918-we] [We]_1918-we all glance up and see [Jameson]_186-jameson walking down toward [us]_1918-we with [a woman]_{339-a woman} . [He]_186-jameson ’s in [his]_186-jameson customary navy suit and looking all immaculate , and [they]_1922-they are deep in conversation . “ [He]_186-jameson ’s at work today ? ”_[1922-they] [I]_2959-i frown as [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i did n’t even know [he]_186-jameson came back to work yet . [He]_186-jameson has n’t seen [us]_1918-we and is talking as [he]_186-jameson walks . “ Who ’s [the woman]_198-molly ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . [She]_198-molly looks familiar , but [I]_2959-i ca n’t place [her]_198-molly . [Molly]_198-molly grabs [my]_2959-i arm with a sense of urgency . “ Come on ; let ’s go this way . ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly tries to pull [me]_2959-i into [a shop]_{2309-a shop} . “ Who ’s [the woman]_198-molly ? ”_[198-molly] [I]_2959-i repeat as [they]_1924-they get closer . “ [Claudia Mason]_57-claudia . ”_[2959-i] The air leaves [my]_2959-i lungs . . . [[his]_186-jameson ex]_{1395-his ex} . [He]_186-jameson ’s with [[his]_186-jameson ex]_{1395-his ex} ? [I]_2959-i begin to hear [my]_2959-i heartbeat in [my]_2959-i ears as the ground sways beneath [me]_2959-i . “ Let ’s go ; [we]_1926-us do n’t want [him]_186-jameson to see [us]_1926-us , ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly urges as [she]_198-molly grabs [my]_2959-i arm once more . [I]_2959-i pull out of [her]_198-molly grip and stand strong . As [he]_186-jameson gets to [us]_1926-us , [he]_186-jameson glances up and sees [me]_2959-i . [His]_186-jameson step falters , and then [he]_186-jameson clenches [his]_186-jameson jaw and does n’t make eye contact . Tears well in [my]_2959-i eyes as [I]_2959-i watch [him]_186-jameson walk past . [He]_186-jameson stops with [his]_186-jameson back to [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i hold [my]_2959-i breath . Turn around . . . turn around . After a moment , [he]_186-jameson falls back into stride beside [the woman]_198-molly and disappears up [the street]_{1870-the street} without looking back . A searing pain lurches through [my]_2959-i chest as [I]_2959-i fight tears . [I]_2959-i drop [my]_2959-i head in sadness . There ’s [my]_2959-i answer . That ’s it . . . [we]_1928-we ’re done . It ’s Friday night , and [I]_2959-i slide down in the seat of [[my]_2959-i rental car]_{1929-my rental car} as [I]_2959-i peer across [the darkened street]_{1870-the street} . [I]_2959-i ’ve completely throw [myself]_2959-i into solving the case , if not for any reason other than to distract [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i ’m outside [[Hayden]_266-jim ’s apartment]_{385-new york} , and [I]_2959-i know that [I]_2959-i ’m probably clutching at straws by being [here]_{385-new york} , but what else am [I]_2959-i going to do ? Crying and staring at the wall is getting old . A text comes through on [my]_2959-i phone , and [I]_2959-i glance down and see the letter J. [I]_2959-i read the text and nearly drop the phone in shock . One last stop over . [JFK Airport]_{42-jfk airport} . Sat , 8 pm . [JFK Clubhouse Bar]_{43-jfk clubhouse bar} . [I]_2959-i need to see [you]_1931-he . J xxx [I]_2959-i sit up . What ? [He]_1931-he needs to see [me]_2959-i . . . [he]_1931-he needs to see [me]_2959-i ? [Hope]_222-hope blooms in [my]_2959-i chest . Oh [[my]_2959-i God]_{2363-my god} . [I]_2959-i immediately call [Molly]_198-molly . “ Hello , ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly answers . “ [Jameson]_186-jameson just texted [me]_2959-i . [He]_1931-he wants to meet tomorrow night ! ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i blurt out in a rush . “ What ? ”_[198-molly] [she]_198-molly snaps . “ Did [you]_1931-he tell [him]_1931-he to go fuck [himself]_1931-he ? ”_[198-molly] “ No . ”_[198-molly] “ Why not ? ”_[198-molly] “ Because . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i try to think of a perfect explanation . “ Maybe seeing [Claudia]_57-claudia snapped [him]_1931-he out of this , and [I]_2959-i want to see [him]_1931-he too , [Moll]_198-molly . This is what [I]_2959-i ’ve been wanting all along . ”_[2959-i] “ Oh God , can [you]_1931-he hear [yourself]_1931-he ? Why would [you]_1931-he want to see [him]_1931-he ? [He]_1931-he ’s been a complete douchebag . ”_[198-molly] “ [I]_2959-i know , but [he]_1931-he ’s been under so much stress , [Molly]_198-molly . [I]_2959-i just need to talk to [him]_1931-he . ”_[2959-i] “ For the record , [I]_1933-she think this is a bad idea . ”_[1933-she] [She]_1933-she sighs . [I]_2959-i smile . [She]_1933-she ’s wrong . . . this is a great idea . [I]_2959-i text [him]_1933-she back . See [you]_1933-she there . x [I]_2959-i smile goofily out the windshield and look over to see [Hayden]_266-jim talking to [that same girl who used to work at [Miles Media]_{14-miles media}]_{1934-that same girl who used to work at miles media} . [Lara Aspin]_{125-lara aspin} . . . something is up with [her]_1933-she too . [I]_2959-i want to know more about [her]_1933-she ; so far , [I]_2959-i ’ve been unable to dig up anything , not even an address . [She]_1933-she finishes [her]_1933-she conversation with [Hayden]_266-jim and begins to walk down [the street]_{724-the sidewalk} . [My]_2959-i eyes flick between [her]_1933-she and [Hayden]_266-jim . Shit , what do [I]_2959-i do ? [I]_2959-i watch [Hayden]_266-jim disappear into [[his]_266-jim building]_{1160-his building} . Well , [I]_2959-i already know where [Hayden]_266-jim lives . If [I]_2959-i let [her]_1933-she go , [I]_2959-i may never find [her]_1933-she again . [I]_2959-i really do need to know where [she]_1933-she lives . [I]_2959-i watch [her]_1933-she as [she]_1933-she walks down [the street]_{724-the sidewalk} . Damn it . [I]_2959-i jump out of [the car]_{369-the car} and cross [the street]_{724-the sidewalk} and fall in behind [her]_1933-she on [the sidewalk]_{724-the sidewalk} . [She]_1933-she walks down [the subway stairs]_{1938-the subway stairs} , and [I]_2959-i hesitate . It ’s dark , and [God]_0-aaron knows where [she]_1933-she ’s going . . . shit . [I]_2959-i watch [her]_1933-she disappear down [the stairs]_{1938-the subway stairs} , and [I]_2959-i brace [myself]_2959-i . Damn it . [I]_2959-i have to follow [her]_1933-she . [We]_1939-we wait on [the platform]_{1940-the platform} for a while , and then [she]_1933-she gets onto [a train]_{1941-the train} , and [I]_2959-i get on after [her]_1933-she . [I]_2959-i stand by the doors and stare out the window while [I]_2959-i keep [her]_1933-she in [my]_2959-i peripheral vision . Adrenaline is surging through [my]_2959-i body , and [I]_2959-i have to admit , this is actually kind of fun . [I]_2959-i should have been [a cop]_{1942-a cop} . [We]_1939-we go four stops , and then [she]_1933-she gets up and stands by the door . [The stop]_{1943-the stop} is [Central Station]_{44-central station} , and [I]_2959-i let out a sigh of relief — at least it ’s safe there . [We]_1939-we get off [the train]_{1941-the train} , and [I]_2959-i drop back so [she]_1933-she does n’t get suspicious . [We]_1939-we walk , and [we]_1939-we walk , and [we]_1939-we walk . . . damn it , where is [she]_1933-she going ? [She]_1933-she disappears into a crowd , and [I]_2959-i jump up to see if [I]_2959-i can see [her]_1933-she . [I]_2959-i walk farther , and [I]_2959-i ca n’t see [her]_1933-she . [She]_1933-she ’s disappeared into thin air . Damn it . [I]_2959-i turn and look back down [the street]_{550-the street} [we]_1939-we just came from . Where did [she]_1933-she go ? [I]_2959-i walk back a little way , and then [I]_2959-i catch sight of [her]_1933-she in [a shop]_{2309-a shop} . Thank God . [I]_2959-i duck in and then notice it ’s a pawnshop . [I]_2959-i pretend to look at something in the back as [she]_1933-she talks to [the man on the desk]_{1946-the man on the desk} . “ Well , it ’s not worth much , ”_{[1946-the man on the desk]} [he]_{1946-the man on the desk} says . “ [I]_1933-she would like five hundred dollars for it . It ’s in perfect working order , ”_[1933-she] [she]_1933-she replies . “ [You]_3291-you ’re dreaming . No way . ”_[1933-she] [I]_2959-i peer through a gap in a bookcase and see a MacBook . Shit . . . [she]_1933-she ’s selling [her]_1933-she computer . Why would [she]_1933-she be selling a computer ? [My]_2959-i mind begins to race as [the two of [them]_{2419-the two of them}]_{2419-the two of them} haggle over the price . [The shop attendant]_{1948-the shop attendant} wins in the end , and [he]_{1948-the shop attendant} hands over two hundred dollars . [I]_2959-i watch [her]_1933-she disappear out the door , and [I]_2959-i wait for a moment and go to the desk . “ Hello . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile casually . “ Hey , ”_[2959-i] [the overweight pawnshop man]_{1946-the man on the desk} mutters as [he]_{1946-the man on the desk} counts [his]_{1946-the man on the desk} till up . This may just be the craziest thing [I]_2959-i ’ve ever done , and [I]_2959-i ’ve done some pretty crazy things in [my]_2959-i life . “ [I]_{1946-the man on the desk} would like to buy that computer , please . ”_{[1946-the man on the desk]} [He]_{1946-the man on the desk} frowns as [he]_{1946-the man on the desk} glances up . “ What one ? ”_{[1946-the man on the desk]} [I]_2959-i point to the one [she]_1933-she just sold [him]_{1946-the man on the desk} . “ Nah , [I]_2959-i have n’t cleaned it up yet . Go to the cabinet on the left , and find another one . ”_[2959-i] “ No , it has to be that one . ”_{[1946-the man on the desk]} “ Not for sale yet . Come back in two days . ”_[2959-i] If [I]_2959-i come back in two days , it will be wiped . “ Name [your]_{1946-the man on the desk} price , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i assert , feeling brave . [He]_{1946-the man on the desk} stills , and [his]_{1946-the man on the desk} eyes come to [mine]_2959-i . “ A thousand dollars . ”_{[1946-the man on the desk]} [He]_{1946-the man on the desk} raises an eyebrow in a silent dare . “ [You]_{1946-the man on the desk} just paid two hundred for it — are [you]_{1946-the man on the desk} crazy ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer . [He]_{1946-the man on the desk} shrugs and goes back to what [he]_{1946-the man on the desk} ’s doing . [I]_2959-i stare at the computer on the desk , and [I]_2959-i do n’t know why , but [my]_2959-i gut is telling [me]_2959-i to buy it . “ Damn it , okay , fine . As it is , right now , for a thousand dollars . ”_{[1946-the man on the desk]} [He]_{1946-the man on the desk} smiles a slimy grin . “ Okay , honey . ”_{[1946-the man on the desk]} [I]_2959-i hand [him]_{1946-the man on the desk} over [[my]_2959-i mother]_76-woman ’s credit card , the one [I]_2959-i have for emergencies . . . sorry , [Mom]_70-mom . [I]_2959-i pay the thousand dollars and take the computer and walk out the front door . [My]_2959-i phone rings . [Tristan]_2430-tristan ’s name lights up the screen . Perfect timing . “ Hello , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i answer . “ Sorry [I]_{1946-the man on the desk} took so long to get back to [you]_70-mom . [That girl]_76-woman ’s name is [Lara Aspin]_{125-lara aspin} , and get this — [she]_76-woman used to work in accounts , ”_{[1946-the man on the desk]} [he]_{1946-the man on the desk} blurts out . “ What does that mean ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ [She]_76-woman had access to the bank account details . ”_[2959-i] “ Oh [my]_2959-i God , [Tristan]_2430-tristan , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper as [I]_2959-i look around guiltily . “ [I]_2959-i just followed [her]_76-woman on [the train]_{1941-the train} , and [she]_76-woman sold [her]_76-woman computer to a pawnshop , and [I]_2959-i know this is crazy , but [I]_2959-i just bought it for a thousand dollars . ”_[2959-i] “ What ? [You]_3293-you have it ? [You]_3293-you actually have [her]_76-woman computer ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile proudly . “ Uh - huh . ”_[2959-i] “ Where are [you]_3293-you ? [I]_2959-i ’m coming to get [you]_3293-you now . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i walk through [the airport]_{254-the airport} with [my]_2959-i heart in [my]_2959-i throat . [I]_2959-i ’m pulling [my]_2959-i small carry - on suitcase so that [I]_2959-i look the part of [a tired traveler]_{1951-a tired traveler} . . . or perhaps [I]_2959-i ’m just trying to pretend to [myself]_2959-i that this is n’t a bad idea . Because [I]_2959-i know it is ; deep in [my]_2959-i gut [I]_2959-i know that [I]_2959-i should n’t be playing this dangerous game with [him]_1952-him . [I]_2959-i should be sitting down and having a civilized grown - up conversation . But desperation has brought out [my]_2959-i weakness , and [I]_2959-i ’m hoping that tonight [Jameson]_186-jameson and [I]_2959-i can talk . . . and [he]_186-jameson can apologize and beg for [me]_2959-i to come back , and then [I]_2959-i can punish [him]_186-jameson , and [we]_1953-we can begin to get back on track . [I]_2959-i have n’t seen [Claudia]_57-claudia again , so [I]_2959-i have no idea what is going on with [her]_57-claudia , but the fact that [Jameson]_186-jameson wanted to see [me]_2959-i tonight tells [me]_2959-i that it ’s nothing . [I]_2959-i hope it ’s nothing . . . God , [I]_2959-i hope it ’s nothing . . . stop it . [I]_2959-i duck into [the bathroom]_{300-the bathroom} to give [myself]_2959-i one last pep talk . [I]_2959-i reapply [my]_2959-i red lipstick , [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s personal favorite , and [I]_2959-i stare at [my]_2959-i reflection in the mirror . [My]_2959-i long dark hair is out and wavy . [I]_2959-i wanted to wear a dress but did n’t want to seem too eager , so [I]_2959-i finally decided to wear black fitted capri pants and a black silk shirt with the top button strategically undone . [My]_2959-i black lace bra is just peeking through if [I]_2959-i move the right way . [I]_2959-i ’m wearing [his]_186-jameson favorite fragrance and think [I]_2959-i look sexy without trying to be sexy . . . is that even a thing ? [God]_0-aaron knows . [I]_2959-i guess [I]_2959-i ’ll soon find out . Do n’t be needy . . . do n’t be whiny . . . and do n’t be overdramatic , [I]_2959-i remind [myself]_2959-i . Be sexy and alluring . . . like [I]_2959-i was when [we]_1955-we first met . Right , [I]_2959-i can do this . [I]_2959-i drop [my]_2959-i shoulders , take a deep breath , and steel [myself]_2959-i for the night ahead . This is literally a make - or - break situation . [I]_2959-i need to remind [him]_186-jameson why [he]_186-jameson fell in love with [me]_2959-i in the first place . . . how the hell has [he]_186-jameson forgotten ? That in itself is an issue . . . [I]_2959-i close [my]_2959-i eyes in disgust . Stop overthinking this . [I]_2959-i walk down [the corridor]_{609-the corridor} and into [the Clubhouse Bar]_{45-the clubhouse bar} . It ’s busy and bustling . [I]_2959-i walk in and take a seat in the corner at a bench - seat table for two . If [he]_186-jameson wants to see [me]_2959-i , then [he]_186-jameson can find [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i ’m on a stopover and totally oblivious to anything around [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i take out [my]_2959-i laptop and open [my]_2959-i emails . “ Can [I]_{717-the waiter} get [you]_{717-the waiter} a drink ? ”_{[717-the waiter]} [the waiter]_{717-the waiter} asks as [he]_{717-the waiter} approaches [my]_2959-i table . “ Yes , please . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [I]_2959-i smile as [I]_2959-i hand [him]_{717-the waiter} [my]_2959-i credit card . “ A top - shelf margarita , please . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [He]_{717-the waiter} smiles and , with a cheeky wink , walks away . Damn it , that [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson has spoiled [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i seem to have an addiction to top - shelf shit , and it just rolls off [my]_2959-i tongue a little too easy now . [I]_2959-i turn [my]_2959-i attention back to read [my]_2959-i emails and pretend that [they]_1958-they ’re fascinating . [They]_1958-they ’re not . And what [I]_2959-i really want to be doing is giving this place the once - over with an eagle eye . . . is [he]_{717-the waiter} [here]_{385-new york} ? [The waiter]_{717-the waiter} returns with [my]_2959-i drink . “ Here [you]_3294-you are , a top - shelf margarita . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [He]_{717-the waiter} places it down onto the table . “ And [the gentleman at the bar]_{3295-the gentleman at the bar} asked that [I]_{717-the waiter} deliver these to [you]_3294-you . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [He]_{717-the waiter} places a large bowl of strawberries and a dipping bowl of hot chocolate on the table . [My]_2959-i eyes rise to where [he]_{717-the waiter} gestures , and [I]_2959-i see [Jameson]_186-jameson sitting at [the bar]_{459-the bar} . [He]_{717-the waiter} ’s wearing dark denim jeans and a white shirt that [I]_2959-i bought [him]_{717-the waiter} . [His]_{717-the waiter} dark hair is messed to perfection . [Our]_1961-our eyes lock , and [he]_{717-the waiter} raises [his]_{717-the waiter} glass and then takes a sip . [My]_2959-i stomach rolls in excitement . [He]_{717-the waiter} has n’t looked at [me]_2959-i like that in a long time . “ Thank [you]_{717-the waiter} , ”_{[717-the waiter]} [I]_2959-i reply to [the waiter]_{717-the waiter} , completely distracted by [the beautiful specimen at the bar]_{1963-the beautiful specimen at the bar} . [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i margarita as [I]_2959-i try to keep the goofy smile from [my]_2959-i face , and [I]_2959-i turn back to [my]_2959-i emails to act uninterested . Strawberries with hot chocolate ; there ’s no way to eat them without slurping them up and looking like an animal . [I]_2959-i smirk . . . maybe that ’s what [he]_{717-the waiter} wants ? Game on . With [my]_2959-i eyes locked onto [my]_2959-i computer screen , [I]_2959-i pick up a strawberry and dip it into the hot chocolate and lick it and then place it seductively in [my]_2959-i mouth . [I]_2959-i suck the chocolate and rub it back and forth over [my]_2959-i lips . [I]_2959-i take a sip of [my]_2959-i margarita and then repeat the move . [I]_2959-i smile to [myself]_2959-i . . . what the actual hell am [I]_2959-i doing ? [I]_2959-i ’m in [an airport bar]_{1964-an airport bar} when [I]_2959-i ’m not flying anywhere , pretending not to know [someone]_2326-someone while [he]_2326-someone watches [me]_2959-i go down on a fucking strawberry . This really is beyond bizarre . If [Molly]_198-molly and [Aaron]_0-aaron could only see [me]_2959-i now . [The waiter]_{717-the waiter} arrives with another margarita . “ Compliments from [[your]_0-aaron friend]_{3296-your friend} at [the bar]_{459-the bar} . ”_{[717-the waiter]} “ Thank [you]_0-aaron . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i keep [my]_2959-i eyes down as [I]_2959-i play the game and refuse to look at [him]_{717-the waiter} . Ten minutes later , [I]_2959-i take the final sip of [my]_2959-i margarita and allow [my]_2959-i eyes to drift to [the man at [the bar]_{459-the bar}]_{1967-the man at the bar} ; [his]_{1967-the man at the bar} dark eyes are on [me]_2959-i , and heat blazes between [us]_1969-us . [I]_2959-i know that look . . . [I]_2959-i ’m going to fuck [you]_1970-you . . . so damn good . [I]_2959-i feel [my]_2959-i arousal begin to thump , and with [my]_2959-i eyes locked on [his]_{1967-the man at the bar} , [I]_2959-i pick up a strawberry and lick it . [He]_{1967-the man at the bar} stands as if summoned by [my]_2959-i tongue . With [our]_1969-us eyes locked , [I]_2959-i suck , and [he]_{1967-the man at the bar} walks toward [my]_2959-i table . “ Mind if [I]_{1967-the man at the bar} take a seat ? ”_{[1967-the man at the bar]} [his]_{1967-the man at the bar} deep , sexy voice purrs . “ Not at all . ”_{[1967-the man at the bar]} [My]_2959-i eyes drop to the bulge in [his]_{1967-the man at the bar} pants , and [I]_2959-i raise [my]_2959-i eyebrow . “ Do n’t [judge]_3297-judge . ”_{[1967-the man at the bar]} [He]_{1967-the man at the bar} smiles as [he]_{1967-the man at the bar} falls into the bench seat beside [me]_2959-i . “ [I]_{1967-the man at the bar} just watched the best damn strawberry porn that [I]_{1967-the man at the bar} ’ve ever seen . ”_{[1967-the man at the bar]} “ Really ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smirk . [I]_2959-i feel the heat from [his]_{1967-the man at the bar} close proximity , and [I]_2959-i have to fight not to lean toward [him]_{1967-the man at the bar} . [He]_{1967-the man at the bar} holds out [his]_{1967-the man at the bar} hand . “ [I]_{1967-the man at the bar} ’m [Jim]_266-jim . ”_{[1967-the man at the bar]} [My]_2959-i heart free - falls from [my]_2959-i chest , exactly like the first time . [I]_2959-i take [his]_{1967-the man at the bar} hand , and electricity shoots up [my]_2959-i arm like an electric shock . “ Hi , [Jim]_266-jim . [I]_2959-i ’m [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] So [we]_1971-we ’re playing that game , are [we]_1971-we ? Pretending [we]_1971-we do n’t know [each other]_{2339-each other} . This really is like a stopover do - over . [I]_2959-i ’ll do whatever it takes to break the ice between [us]_1971-we . With [his]_{1967-the man at the bar} elbows resting on the table , [he]_{1967-the man at the bar} steeples [his]_{1967-the man at the bar} hands under [his]_{1967-the man at the bar} chin . [His]_{1967-the man at the bar} eyes dance with mischief . “ Where are [you]_{1967-the man at the bar} flying to , [Emily]_186-jameson ? ”_{[1967-the man at the bar]} “ [London]_6-london . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i drink . “ [You]_186-jameson ? ”_[2959-i] “ Dubai . [My]_{1967-the man at the bar} flight ’s been delayed . ”_{[1967-the man at the bar]} “ [Mine]_{1967-the man at the bar} too . ”_{[1967-the man at the bar]} With locked eyes , [we]_1971-we both sip [our]_1971-we drinks . The air is electric , and regardless of the love that [I]_2959-i have for [this man]_56-robbie , there is no denying that the sexual chemistry [we]_1971-we have is out of [this world]_{1191-this world} . “ Thanks for the drink . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile softly . “ [You]_186-jameson ’re welcome . ”_{[1967-the man at the bar]} [His]_{1967-the man at the bar} eyes are dark and hooded , and [I]_2959-i can feel [his]_{1967-the man at the bar} arousal from here . “ What do [you]_186-jameson do for a living ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ [I]_{1967-the man at the bar} ’m a tour guide , ”_{[1967-the man at the bar]} [he]_{1967-the man at the bar} replies without hesitation . “ Really ? What kind of tours do [you]_186-jameson run ? ”_{[1967-the man at the bar]} “ Camping . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snort [my]_2959-i drink up [my]_2959-i nose as [I]_2959-i giggle . “ Oh . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i cough . “ So . . . [you]_186-jameson ’re [the outdoor type]_{3298-the outdoor type} ? ”_[2959-i] “ Totally . ”_{[1967-the man at the bar]} [He]_{1967-the man at the bar} sips [his]_{1967-the man at the bar} margarita . “ [I]_{1967-the man at the bar} ’m at one with nature . ”_{[1967-the man at the bar]} [He]_{1967-the man at the bar} crosses [his]_{1967-the man at the bar} two fingers to show [me]_2959-i just how close . [I]_2959-i try and fail to hide [my]_2959-i broad smile . “ That ’s good to know . [Cavemen]_223-cavemen are such a turn - on . ”_[2959-i] [His]_{1967-the man at the bar} eyes dance with delight ; [he]_{1967-the man at the bar} likes this game . [I]_2959-i do too . “ What do [you]_186-jameson do ? ”_{[1967-the man at the bar]} [he]_{1967-the man at the bar} asks . “ [I]_{1967-the man at the bar} ’m [a psychic]_{3299-a psychic} . ”_{[1967-the man at the bar]} [He]_{1967-the man at the bar} bursts out laughing . Oh , it feels good to see [him]_{1967-the man at the bar} laugh again . “ [A psychic]_{3299-a psychic} ? ”_{[1967-the man at the bar]} [His]_{1967-the man at the bar} eyes widen in surprise . “ Yes . ”_{[1967-the man at the bar]} “ So . . . [you]_186-jameson read minds ? ”_{[1967-the man at the bar]} “ [I]_{1967-the man at the bar} do . ”_{[1967-the man at the bar]} “ All right . ”_{[1967-the man at the bar]} [He]_{1967-the man at the bar} looks around [the bar]_{459-the bar} and gestures to [a woman with [his]_{1967-the man at the bar} drink]_{1976-a woman with his drink} . “ Tell [me]_2959-i what [that woman]_{1976-a woman with his drink} ’s saying over there . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i look over and see [an older woman who looks like [she]_246-alan is scolding [[her]_246-alan husband]_{1978-her husband}]_246-alan as [he]_{1978-her husband} drinks [his]_{1978-her husband} beer . “ [She]_246-alan ’s telling [him]_{1978-her husband} that [he]_{1978-her husband} had better hurry up and put on [his]_{1978-her husband} compression socks before the flight and that [he]_{1978-her husband} ’s had enough . [They]_3300-they wo n’t let [him]_{1978-her husband} on [the plane]_{268-the plane} if [he]_{1978-her husband} ’s drunk . ”_[246-alan] “ Hmm . ”_{[1978-her husband]} [He]_{1978-her husband} smirks as [he]_{1978-her husband} looks around . “ What about [him]_{1978-her husband} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i look over to [the man who is looking at [his]_246-alan phone]_246-alan . “ [[He]_246-alan ’s googling prostitutes for [his]_246-alan business trip]_{3302-he ’s googling prostitutes for his business trip} . ”_[2959-i] “ And [him]_246-alan ? ”_[246-alan] “ Wondering if [[his]_246-alan wife]_{3303-his wife} is sleeping with [[her]_{3303-his wife} boss]_{3304-her boss} . ”_[246-alan] [His]_246-alan smile broadens . “ [You]_{3304-her boss} ’re good . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i cock [my]_2959-i head . “ [I]_2959-i know . ”_[2959-i] “ And [her]_{3303-his wife} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i look over at [a girl staring at [her]_{1979-a girl staring at her phone with a worried look on her face} phone with a worried look on [her]_{1979-a girl staring at her phone with a worried look on her face} face]_{1979-a girl staring at her phone with a worried look on her face} . “ Googling fungal infections . [She]_{1979-a girl staring at her phone with a worried look on her face} ’s worried that [she]_{1979-a girl staring at her phone with a worried look on her face} caught something from [her]_{1979-a girl staring at her phone with a worried look on her face} wild and condomless Saturday night . ”_[246-alan] [His]_246-alan eyes dance in delight as [he]_246-alan looks around [the bar]_{459-the bar} , and then [his]_246-alan eyes come back to meet [mine]_2959-i . “ What about [me]_246-alan ? ”_[246-alan] “ What are [you]_246-alan thinking ? ”_[246-alan] “ Yes . ”_[1981-our] [Our]_1981-our eyes lock . . . shit , [I]_2959-i promised [myself]_2959-i that [I]_2959-i would n’t be [a drama queen]_{2700-a drama queen} tonight , and that is a surefire question to wind [me]_2959-i up . [I]_2959-i could go to [town]_2456-town on what a jackass [he]_246-alan ’s been . . . and [I]_2959-i will later . “ Right now ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ Yes . ”_[246-alan] [His]_246-alan eyes are dark as [he]_246-alan watches [me]_2959-i . “ It ’s good to see [you]_246-alan . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan gives [me]_2959-i a slow , sexy smile and leans toward [me]_2959-i . “ It is . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan cups [my]_2959-i face in [his]_246-alan hand , and [my]_2959-i heart stops . “ Although that was n’t all [I]_246-alan was thinking . ”_[246-alan] “ No , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i breathe . “ [I]_246-alan know . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan smiles as if fascinated , [our]_1984-our faces only millimeters apart . “ Why do n’t [you]_246-alan tell [me]_246-alan what else [I]_246-alan was thinking ? ”_[246-alan] [His]_246-alan eyes drop to [my]_2959-i lips . “ [You]_246-alan were wondering what the chocolate on [my]_2959-i lips tastes like , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . How am [I]_2959-i supposed to string two words together when [he]_246-alan ’s looking at [me]_2959-i like that ? In slow motion , [he]_246-alan leans in and licks [my]_2959-i open lips . [My]_2959-i sex clenches in appreciation . Oh God . . . “ Are [you]_246-alan flirting with [me]_2959-i , [Jim]_266-jim ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [He]_246-alan licks [me]_2959-i again . “ [I]_246-alan am . How am [I]_246-alan doing ? ”_[246-alan] Goose bumps scatter up [my]_2959-i spine , and [I]_2959-i swallow the lump in [my]_2959-i throat . “ Okay . ”_[2959-i] “ Just okay ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i nod , breathless from [his]_246-alan touch . “ What about when [I]_246-alan do this ? ”_[246-alan] In slow motion [he]_246-alan kisses [me]_2959-i ; [his]_246-alan strong tongue slides through [my]_2959-i open mouth and tenderly caresses [mine]_2959-i . “ That could probably work , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i murmur against [his]_246-alan lips . “ And this ? ”_[246-alan] [His]_246-alan kiss deepens , and [I]_2959-i feel [my]_2959-i arousal waken from its dormant sleep . [I]_2959-i close [my]_2959-i eyes as emotion rushes through [me]_2959-i . . . this is not good . One kiss , and [I]_2959-i ’m about to burst into tears . How could [you]_1985-you treat [me]_2959-i so badly ? Do n’t be a wimp . . . [I]_2959-i need to keep [my]_2959-i emotions in check . . . at least for now . Tomorrow is a different story , but tonight is about celebrating what [we]_1986-we have with each other . [I]_2959-i pull out of [his]_246-alan kiss . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t know what kind of woman [you]_3305-you think [I]_2959-i am , [Jim]_266-jim , but [I]_2959-i can assure [you]_3305-you — picking up [camping tour directors in [an airport bar]_{1964-an airport bar}]_{3306-camping tour directors in an airport bar} is not [my]_2959-i style . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sit back and straighten [my]_2959-i shirt and sip [my]_2959-i margarita . [He]_246-alan rolls [his]_246-alan lips as if amused with the game and picks [my]_2959-i hand up and brings it to [his]_246-alan lips . [He]_246-alan begins to kiss it , and then [he]_246-alan turns it over and , with [his]_246-alan strong tongue , licks the palm of [my]_2959-i hand . [My]_2959-i sex clenches in appreciation . . . fuck . [I]_2959-i ’m losing control of this situation . Fast . [I]_2959-i glance over and see [two girls sitting near [us]_1988-we]_{1987-two girls sitting near us} , transfixed and watching [him]_246-alan with [their]_{1987-two girls sitting near us} mouths hanging open . What must [we]_1988-we look like ? [A gorgeous man sitting here]_{1989-a gorgeous man sitting here} making out with [my]_2959-i hand while [I]_2959-i act totally uninterested . Act being the operative word . “ [You]_{1989-a gorgeous man sitting here} ’re making a scene , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i murmur as [I]_2959-i watch [him]_246-alan . “ [I]_246-alan ca n’t help it , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan murmurs against [my]_2959-i skin . “ It ’s been too long . ”_[246-alan] “ How long ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ Fifteen days . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan kisses [my]_2959-i hand again . “ Fifteen long days . ”_[246-alan] That ’s how long [we]_1988-we ’ve been apart . . . [he]_246-alan knows how long [we]_1988-we ’ve been apart to the day . [He]_246-alan wants to break the ice between [us]_1988-we too . [He]_246-alan ’s missed [me]_2959-i ; [I]_2959-i know [he]_246-alan has . Suddenly [I]_2959-i do n’t want to play hard to get . [I]_2959-i want [him]_246-alan . . . hard . . . and fast . [I]_2959-i pull [my]_2959-i hand away from [his]_246-alan lips . “ Buy [me]_246-alan another drink , and then perhaps [I]_246-alan ’ll put [you]_246-alan out of [your]_246-alan misery . ”_[246-alan] [His]_246-alan eyes flicker with arousal , and [his]_246-alan hand immediately goes up as [he]_246-alan summons [the waiter]_{717-the waiter} . “ Yes , [sir]_246-alan . ”_[246-alan] “ Two — ”_[246-alan] “ Four , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i interrupt [him]_246-alan . [He]_246-alan frowns , probably deterred by the extra time it ’s going to take to drink those . “ Four margaritas , please , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan replies to [the waiter]_{717-the waiter} . “ Yes , [sir]_246-alan . ”_[246-alan] “ Please make it fast , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan adds . [The waiter]_{717-the waiter} frowns at [his]_246-alan apparent desperation . “ Yes , [sir]_246-alan , of course . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan rushes to [the bar]_{459-the bar} . [We]_1992-we stare at [each other]_{2339-each other} as electricity thrums between [us]_1992-we — no words are needed . [We]_1992-we both can feel this magnetic pull to each other ; it ’s too strong to deny . “ It really . . . is good to see [you]_246-alan , [Em]_186-jameson , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan whispers . An hour later [we]_1992-we walk down [the hotel corridor]_{1994-the hotel corridor} , hand in hand . [We]_1992-we are both quiet , lost in [our]_1992-we own thoughts . [My]_2959-i heart is beating so fast , and [I]_2959-i know what ’s about to happen . . . [I]_2959-i ’m looking forward to what ’s about to happen . [He]_246-alan opens the door and leads [me]_2959-i into [the penthouse]_{1995-the penthouse} . [I]_2959-i look around and am instantly reminded of who [I]_2959-i ’m with . It ’s easy for [me]_2959-i to forget [his]_246-alan wealth , but it never goes away . The door closes behind [us]_1992-we , and [he]_246-alan turns [me]_2959-i to [him]_246-alan . [We]_1992-we stare at each other , and then [he]_246-alan wraps [his]_246-alan arms around [me]_2959-i and holds [me]_2959-i tight as [he]_246-alan puts [his]_246-alan head into the crook of [my]_2959-i neck . [He]_246-alan holds [me]_2959-i and holds [me]_2959-i . . . as if scared to let [me]_2959-i go . The love between [us]_1992-we is palpable — so much emotion . . . so much regret — and [I]_2959-i find [myself]_2959-i tearing up . [I]_2959-i want to blurt out that [I]_2959-i love [him]_246-alan , that [he]_246-alan hurt [me]_2959-i , and that [I]_2959-i ’m angry , but [I]_2959-i want to let the moment just be . Let the feelings between [us]_1992-we speak for [themselves]_1992-we ; words seem irrelevant to what ’s between [us]_1992-we . [He]_246-alan pulls back , and [his]_246-alan eyes search [mine]_2959-i . “ [I]_246-alan ’ve missed [you]_246-alan , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan whispers . [I]_2959-i cup [his]_246-alan face in [my]_2959-i two hands , and [I]_2959-i kiss [him]_246-alan long and slow and just how [he]_246-alan likes it . [He]_246-alan smiles against [my]_2959-i lips as [he]_246-alan slowly unbuttons [my]_2959-i shirt and throws it to the side . [He]_246-alan takes off [my]_2959-i bra and cups [my]_2959-i breasts . [His]_246-alan thumbs dust back and forth over [my]_2959-i hardened nipples . [Our]_1996-our lips are locked , and [he]_246-alan undoes [my]_2959-i pants and slides them down and takes them off . [He]_246-alan drops to [his]_246-alan knees , and [I]_2959-i hold [my]_2959-i breath as [he]_246-alan slides [my]_2959-i panties down [my]_2959-i legs and takes them off . [He]_246-alan leans in and inhales [my]_2959-i sex deeply ; [his]_246-alan eyes close in pleasure as [he]_246-alan kisses [me]_2959-i there . Oh . . . [I]_2959-i ’ve missed [him]_246-alan . [I]_2959-i think back to the first night [we]_1997-we had together on [our]_1997-we stopover , and it was so different to this . [His]_246-alan touch back then was filled with lust ; [his]_246-alan touch now is filled with adoration and love . [He]_246-alan lifts [my]_2959-i leg over [his]_246-alan shoulder and licks [me]_2959-i in [my]_2959-i most private part , the one that [nobody]_2321-nobody but [he]_246-alan knows . [My]_2959-i hands instinctively go to the back of [his]_246-alan head . This is insane . [I]_2959-i have n’t touched [him]_246-alan once , and [he]_246-alan ’s on [his]_246-alan knees in front of [me]_2959-i , completely dressed . . . having the time of [his]_246-alan life . [His]_246-alan tongue finds a rhythm , and [my]_2959-i body begins to move by itself , guiding [his]_246-alan tongue just where . [I]_2959-i begin to shudder , and [I]_2959-i close [my]_2959-i eyes to try and block [him]_246-alan out . [He]_246-alan ’s been touching [me]_2959-i for all of four minutes , and [I]_2959-i ’m about to come . . . hold it . [My]_2959-i knees go weak , and [I]_2959-i shudder against [him]_246-alan , and [I]_2959-i feel [him]_246-alan smile into [me]_2959-i . [He]_246-alan laps [me]_2959-i up and lays [me]_2959-i on the bed . [He]_246-alan arranges [me]_2959-i how [he]_246-alan wants [me]_2959-i and spreads [my]_2959-i legs open for [his]_246-alan gaze . “ So . . . fucking perfect , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan whispers to [himself]_246-alan . With urgency , [he]_246-alan tears [his]_246-alan shirt over [his]_246-alan head and slides [his]_246-alan jeans down . [His]_246-alan cock hangs heavy and hard between [his]_246-alan legs . [He]_246-alan ’s so beautiful . . . the perfect male specimen . [I]_2959-i smile up at [him]_246-alan , and then [he]_246-alan goes to [his]_246-alan pocket and takes out a condom . Uneasiness fills [me]_2959-i . “ What are [you]_246-alan doing ? ”_[246-alan] “ [I]_2959-i want [you]_246-alan more than once , and [I]_2959-i do n’t want to lose the sensitivity . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown as [I]_2959-i watch [him]_246-alan roll it on . . . that ’s weird ; in the past [he]_246-alan always made [me]_2959-i roll them on [him]_246-alan as if [he]_246-alan was unable to . [He]_246-alan lies beside [me]_2959-i on the bed and runs [his]_246-alan fingers through [my]_2959-i hair as [he]_246-alan looks down at [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i ca n’t read [him]_246-alan tonight at all . [He]_246-alan seems . . . intense . “ [You]_246-alan ’re seeming very sentimental tonight , [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ Maybe [I]_2959-i am . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reach out and cup [his]_246-alan face in [my]_2959-i hand . [He]_246-alan seems so lost . “ Are [you]_246-alan all right ? ”_[246-alan] “ Tonight [I]_246-alan am . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan leans down and kisses [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i can feel the emotion behind it . It ’s as if [he]_246-alan ’s channeling all [his]_246-alan love through [his]_246-alan lips , and [I]_2959-i lose all coherent thought . [He]_246-alan lies over [me]_2959-i , and [our]_1999-our bodies take on an agenda of [their]_1999-our own as [they]_1999-our writhe together . [Our]_1999-our kiss turns frantic , and [he]_246-alan lifts one of [my]_2959-i legs and slides in deep . [I]_2959-i feel the stretch of [his]_246-alan possession ; there ’s no forgetting [his]_246-alan size . It ’s unapologetic . [We]_1999-our both moan in pleasure , and [he]_246-alan slides out and slowly back in . [I]_2959-i ’m wet , so wet , and the sound of [my]_2959-i arousal hangs in the air . “ Jesus fucking Christ , [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan whispers as [he]_246-alan loses control and slams in hard , knocking the air from [my]_2959-i lungs . And then [we]_1999-our ’re hard at it . The bed is hitting the wall with force ; [our]_1999-our eyes are locked on each other ’s . . . silent . . . and in awe . This is a higher level of frequency . [Our]_1999-our bodies were made to fit together . [We]_1999-our were made to fit together . [He]_246-alan screws up [his]_246-alan face as if in pain . “ [I]_246-alan ca n’t hold it , [babe]_0-aaron , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan pants . [I]_2959-i smile . [I]_2959-i love that [he]_246-alan ca n’t hold it . “ Let go , ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i breathe against [his]_246-alan lips . “ [We]_1999-our have all night . Give [me]_2959-i everything . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i roll over and feel the dull ache deep inside , and [I]_2959-i wince . Oh [man]_2430-tristan . . . [my]_2959-i body is wrecked . [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson fucked [me]_2959-i all night long . Hard and every which way , and today [I]_2959-i ’m going to pay for it . [I]_2959-i turn toward [him]_246-alan . [He]_246-alan ’s lying on [his]_246-alan side , perched on [his]_246-alan elbow , watching [me]_2959-i . “ Hi . ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i smile softly , embarrassed by what [he]_246-alan must have seen . “ Hi . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan leans in and kisses [me]_2959-i before taking [me]_2959-i in [his]_246-alan arms and holding [me]_2959-i tight . “ [I]_2959-i ’m sore , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ That makes [two of [us]_2001-us]_{3192-two of us} . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan smirks . [I]_2959-i close [my]_2959-i eyes against [his]_246-alan chest , and [we]_2001-us lie in peaceful bliss for another half hour , dozing . [I]_2959-i get up to go to [the bathroom]_{300-the bathroom} and notice the trash can full of condoms . . . hmm , [he]_246-alan wore condoms all night . [I]_2959-i did n’t notice at the time . [I]_2959-i get back into bed beside [him]_246-alan and snuggle back against [his]_246-alan chest . “ Why did [you]_3310-you wear condoms last night ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i feel [his]_246-alan body stiffen beneath [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i instantly know it was purposeful . [He]_246-alan stays silent . “ [Jim]_266-jim ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown as [I]_2959-i sit up . “ Do n’t . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan goes to pull [me]_2959-i back down onto [his]_246-alan chest . “ Let ’s just have a nice morning together . ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_246-alan . “ Why would [you]_3310-you wear condoms when [I]_246-alan know how much [you]_3310-you hate [them]_3311-them ? ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan exhales heavily as if annoyed and gets out of bed . “ [I]_246-alan do n’t want any accidents . ”_[246-alan] “ What ? ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan exhales heavily as if frustrated . [I]_2959-i sit up . “ [You]_3310-you think [I]_246-alan would trap [you]_3310-you by getting pregnant ? ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan rolls [his]_246-alan eyes . “ What the hell ? ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i snap as [I]_2959-i jump out of bed . “ Are [you]_3310-you serious ? ”_[2959-i] “ [We]_3312-we ’re not together , [Emily]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i would have to be [a fucking idiot]_{142-a fucking idiot} to not take precautions . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i face falls . “ What was last night ? ”_[2959-i] [His]_2959-i eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ It was goodbye . ”_[2959-i] “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i can feel the tears of shock welling in [my]_2959-i eyes . “ Do n’t be upset , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan stammers . “ Do n’t be upset ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i cry as [I]_2959-i begin to lose control . “ [You]_3310-you summoned [me]_246-alan here to meet [you]_3310-you with absolutely no intention of [us]_3314-us getting back together ? ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan stares at [me]_2959-i . “ Is that true ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i yell . “ [I]_246-alan ’m not [the man for [you]_3310-you]_{3315-the man for you} , [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan replies calmly , and [I]_2959-i know that this is a practiced speech . [I]_2959-i frown as the walls begin to close in around [me]_2959-i . “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ [You]_3310-you ’re in love with [Jim]_266-jim . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i angrily swipe the tears as [they]_2003-they roll down [my]_2959-i cheeks . “ [I]_2959-i ’m [Jameson]_186-jameson . [Jim]_266-jim does n’t exist , [Emily]_186-jameson . [He]_266-jim ’s a figment of [your]_3310-you imagination , [the man [you]_3310-you want [me]_2959-i to be]_266-jim . ”_[2959-i] “ What the fuck are [you]_3310-you talking about ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i cry . “ [You]_3310-you ’re better off without [me]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] “ If this is about [Jake]_108-jay — ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer . “ This is n’t about [Jake]_108-jay , although [I]_2959-i ’m fucking furious with [you]_108-jay for lying to [me]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i swear to [you]_108-jay that nothing happened , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i cry . “ [I]_2959-i know it did n’t . ”_[2959-i] “ Then why ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t understand . [We]_3316-we belong together , [Jay]_108-jay . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i ca n’t . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i closes [his]_2959-i eyes and pauses for a moment as if steeling [himself]_2959-i to push the words past [his]_2959-i lips . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t want marriage and [babies]_3317-babies . [I]_2959-i do n’t want the same things as [you]_108-jay . [I]_2959-i ’m not cut out to do normal , [Emily]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i ’m married to [my]_2959-i job . It will never change . [I]_2959-i ’ve thought long and hard about this . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i step back from [him]_2959-i as horror dawns . [I]_2959-i can hear [my]_2959-i own heartbeat in the silence . “ [I]_2959-i will always love [you]_2959-i , ”_[2959-i] [he]_2959-i whispers . [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_2959-i through tears . . . what the fuck is happening right now ? [He]_2959-i brushes past [me]_2959-i and goes into [the bathroom]_{300-the bathroom} , and the door closes . [I]_2959-i stare at a piece of carpet on the floor , shocked to [my]_2959-i core . After the beautiful night [we]_2005-we had together . . . this is how [he]_2959-i treats [me]_2959-i ? [He]_2959-i reappears fully dressed , and [his]_2959-i eyes find [mine]_2959-i . “ Can [I]_2959-i give [you]_2959-i a lift somewhere ? ”_[2959-i] “ If [you]_2959-i walk out that door now , [we]_2005-we are over forever , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [His]_2959-i eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ [I]_2959-i know . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i steps forward and kisses [me]_2959-i softly as [he]_2959-i cups [my]_2959-i face in [his]_2959-i hands . [Our]_2005-we faces screw up against each other ’s . “ This is for the best ; [another man]_{526-another man} can make [you]_2959-i happier . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i step back , furious . “ Do n’t [you]_2959-i dare throw that shit at [me]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] “ Do [you]_2959-i want a lift or not ? ”_[2959-i] “ Go to hell , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i spit . [His]_2959-i haunted eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ [I]_2959-i ’m already there . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i turns and walks out the door . It clicks quietly behind [him]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i sob out loud into the silence as [I]_2959-i hold [my]_2959-i poor heart . Chapter 23 [I]_2959-i sit on the carpet cross - legged , with [my]_2959-i back rested against the couch , and flick [my]_2959-i phone . [I]_2959-i watch it spin until it slows in momentum , and [I]_2959-i spin it again . It ’s been a weird day today — one of realization and the closing of a chapter in [my]_2959-i life . [I]_2959-i ’m not crying . [I]_2959-i do n’t have any tears left for [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson . To be honest , [I]_2959-i ’m just angry , mostly with [myself]_2959-i for meeting [him]_2959-i last night and being [his]_2959-i puppet once again . [Magic Mike XXL]_60-michael is on [Netflix]_87-netflix , and [I]_2959-i ’m watching it again . It ’s ironic , really , that [we]_2006-our started [our]_2006-our love affair watching this movie , and now [I]_2959-i ’m watching it again on [our]_2006-our demise . [I]_2959-i ’ve been deep in thought . [I]_2959-i ’ve got some decisions to make — big decisions . About where [I]_2959-i ’m going with [my]_2959-i life . . . [my]_2959-i career and [my]_2959-i future at [Miles Media]_{14-miles media} . [I]_2959-i already know what [I]_2959-i need to do . [I]_2959-i glance up to the television , and it ’s a campfire scene on [the beach]_{2007-the beach} , and [the men]_{378-the men} are talking about [a woman one of [them]_{378-the men} loved]_{2009-a woman one of them loved} . “ When [someone]_2326-someone shows [themselves]_{378-the men} to [you]_3320-you . . . believe [them]_{378-the men} . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i chest constricts at the significance of that statement . For weeks now , [I]_2959-i ’ve refused to believe that [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson was coldhearted . [He]_186-jameson is , though ; no matter how [the man [I]_2959-i thought [I]_2959-i knew presented [himself]_186-jameson]_{2010-the man i thought i knew presented himself} . . . [his]_186-jameson reality is a lie . “ [Jim]_266-jim does n’t exist , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson said . [My]_2959-i phone rings , and the name [Tristan]_2430-tristan lights up the screen . [I]_2959-i frown . “ Hello . ”_[2959-i] “ Oh [my]_2959-i God , [Em]_186-jameson . [They]_{378-the men} think [they]_{378-the men} ’ve found it . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sit up . “ What ? ”_[2959-i] “ [Lara Aspin]_{125-lara aspin} ’s computer — there ’s evidence on there that it was used to log in to [our]_3321-our bank accounts . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ What ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper , wide eyed . “ [We]_3321-our do n’t have details yet , but the computer analysts just called to let [us]_3321-our know that the history is very promising . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . “ That ’s great . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2430-tristan ’ll see [you]_2430-tristan in [the office]_{385-new york} in the morning ? Come up to the top floor as soon as [you]_2430-tristan get in . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ Yeah , sure . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pause on the line . “ Hey , thanks for letting [me]_2959-i know . ”_[2959-i] “ See [you]_2430-tristan in the morning , ”_[2959-i] [he]_2959-i says chirpily down the line . [I]_2959-i hang up and , with a sad smile , stare into space for a moment . [I]_2959-i get up and open [my]_2959-i laptop at the kitchen table , and [I]_2959-i begin to type . [I]_2959-i believe [you]_2011-you , [Jameson]_186-jameson . . . [I]_2959-i finally believe [you]_2011-you . “ Oh [my]_0-aaron God , [Em]_186-jameson , did [you]_2011-you hear ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron smiles happily as [he]_0-aaron spins on [his]_0-aaron chair toward [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i ’ve just arrived at work for the morning and put [my]_2959-i handbag down onto the desk . “ What ? ”_[0-aaron] “ The headlines today say that [they]_3323-they have made an arrest over the embezzlement . ”_[0-aaron] “ Really ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i fake a smile . “ That ’s great . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i look around . “ Is [Moll]_198-molly here yet ? ”_[2959-i] “ No , [she]_246-alan ’ll be [here]_{385-new york} soon . ”_[0-aaron] [He]_0-aaron turns on [his]_0-aaron computer . “ Okay , [I]_0-aaron ’ll be back in a moment . ”_[0-aaron] [I]_2959-i take the envelope from [my]_2959-i bag and swipe [my]_2959-i card to get to the roof . Funnily enough , it works today . The doors open , and [Sammia]_246-alan smiles broadly as if [she]_246-alan ’s happy to see [me]_2959-i . “ Good morning , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_[246-alan] “ [Hi]_224-hi . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i look around . “ Is [Tristan]_2430-tristan here ? ”_[2959-i] “ Yes , [he]_2430-tristan ’s in [[Jameson]_186-jameson ’s office]_{2600-jameson ’s office} . Just go through . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i stomach drops . “ Okay , thank [you]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i walk across the tiles and make a mental note of the sound . [My]_2959-i shoes do n’t click on the tiles anymore , and [I]_2959-i think back to a time when [they]_2012-they did . [I]_2959-i look out over the view and take a picture in [my]_2959-i mind . [I]_2959-i do love [this building]_{382-this building} — so many exciting memories of when [I]_2959-i started coming up to this floor . [I]_2959-i knock on the door and hear [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s strong voice . “ Come in . ”_{[186-jameson]} Here [we]_2014-we go . [I]_2959-i swallow [my]_2959-i nerves and open the door , and [Tristan]_2430-tristan ’s face lights up . “ Here [she]_3326-she is . [The hero of the day]_2430-tristan . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ Hi . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes find [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s across [the room]_{514-the room} . “ Hi . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson dips [his]_186-jameson head as if ashamed . “ The evidence is all on the computer , [Em]_186-jameson . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan beams . “ [You]_2430-tristan did it ; [you]_2430-tristan solved the case . [I]_2430-tristan do n’t know why [you]_2430-tristan kept following [her]_3326-she , but [boy]_2430-tristan , am [I]_2430-tristan glad that [you]_2430-tristan did . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ Happy [I]_186-jameson could help . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Thank [you]_2430-tristan . ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson frowns as if pained . “ [I]_2430-tristan ’m very grateful for [your]_2430-tristan dedication to solving the case . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan looks between [us]_2016-us and must sense the tension between [us]_2016-us . “ [I]_186-jameson ’m going to leave [you]_2430-tristan two alone . [We]_2016-us need to celebrate . . . tonight , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson calls as [he]_186-jameson rushes from [the room]_{514-the room} in an excited flurry . It must be such a relief to [him]_186-jameson to have the case against [Jameson]_186-jameson coming to an end . [I]_2959-i close [my]_2959-i eyes . Damn it , just get this over with . [I]_2959-i hand [Jameson]_186-jameson the envelope , and [he]_186-jameson stares at it in [his]_186-jameson hand . “ What ’s this ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson asks . “ [My]_186-jameson letter of resignation . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson frowns as [his]_186-jameson eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ No , [Em]_3327-em . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson shakes [his]_186-jameson head . “ [I]_186-jameson ca n’t accept this . ”_{[186-jameson]} Emotion overwhelms [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i blink so that [I]_2959-i do n’t cry . “ [I]_2959-i ca n’t work here , [Jameson]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_2959-i love [Miles Media]_{68-miles media} — working here was [your]_2959-i dream , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson whispers . “ No . [You]_2959-i ’re wrong . [I]_186-jameson loved [you]_2959-i . . . and [you]_2959-i were [my]_186-jameson dream . [I]_186-jameson ’ve taken a position with [Athena]_200-athena , the place [I]_186-jameson did [my]_186-jameson internships . [I]_186-jameson start next Monday . ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson eyes search [mine]_2959-i . “ [Em]_3328-em . . . ”_{[186-jameson]} A tear escapes onto [my]_2959-i cheek , and [I]_2959-i wipe it away with a nervous smile . “ [You]_2959-i know , [I]_186-jameson watched [Magic Mike XXL]_60-michael last night . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson listens . “ And there was this poignant line that finally made everything make sense to [me]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Which was ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ When [someone]_2326-someone shows [themselves]_2326-someone to [you]_2959-i . . . believe [them]_2326-someone . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson frowns , not understanding . “ [I]_186-jameson finally believe [you]_2959-i , [Jameson]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Believe what ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ That [you]_2959-i ’re [a coward]_{3330-a coward} . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson clenches [his]_186-jameson jaw . “ That [you]_2959-i ’re too scared to love [me]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [Our]_2018-our eyes are locked , and an undercurrent of anger runs between [us]_2018-our . “ And [I]_186-jameson deserve [someone who knows that [I]_186-jameson ’m worth the risk]_{3331-someone who knows that i ’m worth the risk} . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson clenches [his]_186-jameson jaw as [he]_186-jameson watches [me]_2959-i . “ [You]_2959-i ’re just not brave enough to love [me]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ That ’s not fair , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson whispers . “ No . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shake [my]_2959-i head softly . “ Falling in love with [you]_2959-i is what is n’t fair . [I]_2959-i never stood a chance . . . [you]_2959-i knew that all along . [You]_2959-i keep [your]_2959-i heart in a tightly sealed [Miles]_186-jameson - High icebox , only to be looked at . ”_[2959-i] [His]_186-jameson face falls , and [I]_2959-i turn and walk from [[his]_186-jameson office]_{385-new york} . [I]_2959-i close the door quietly on [my]_2959-i way out , and [I]_2959-i stare at it for a moment as [I]_2959-i gather the gumption to walk out of [[his]_186-jameson office]_{385-new york} for the last time . In a strange kind of irony , this has been the best and worst time of [my]_2959-i life . Goodbye , [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} . [I]_2959-i will always miss [you]_{79-mr. miles} . [Jameson]_186-jameson With a tight chest , [I]_2959-i watch [Emily]_186-jameson leave [the office]_{385-new york} . The door clicks closed , and the walls begin to close in around [me]_2959-i . On autopilot , [I]_2959-i pour [myself]_2959-i a scotch and walk to the window . [I]_2959-i stare out over [New York]_{385-new york} as [I]_2959-i fight an overwhelming sense of sadness . [She]_186-jameson ’s gone . Knock , knock . [Tristan]_2430-tristan appears and smiles broadly as [he]_2430-tristan sees [my]_2959-i drink . “ [We]_3332-we celebrating already ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ Seems that way . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan looks around . “ Where ’s [Emily]_186-jameson ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ [She]_186-jameson left . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i scotch and feel the warmth of the amber fluid . [I]_2959-i stare at it in the glass . “ [She]_186-jameson resigned . Effective immediately . ”_[2959-i] “ What ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} [His]_2430-tristan face falls . “ [You]_2430-tristan ca n’t be serious . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ It ’s for the best . ”_[2959-i] “ What the fuck ? How is it for the best ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ [We]_3332-we were never going to work , [Tris]_2430-tristan ; [you]_2430-tristan knew that . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pause . “ There ’s always going to be an asshole like [Ferrara]_2430-tristan prepared to step on [her]_186-jameson to bring [me]_2959-i down . [I]_2959-i do n’t want [her]_186-jameson dragged through the mud any further . ”_[2959-i] “ Is that what [you]_2430-tristan ’re telling [yourself]_2430-tristan ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} [he]_2430-tristan huffs . [I]_2959-i stare out the window . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t fucking get [you]_2430-tristan , [man]_2430-tristan ; [you]_2430-tristan ’re madly in love with [her]_186-jameson . Why are [you]_2430-tristan really letting [her]_186-jameson go ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pause as [I]_2959-i contemplate [his]_2430-tristan question . “ [She]_186-jameson deserves better than the life [I]_2959-i can give [her]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] “ Fuck off , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [he]_2430-tristan scoffs . “ [She]_186-jameson could n’t get a better life than the one [you]_2430-tristan could give [her]_186-jameson . [She]_186-jameson would never want for anything . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ It ’s not the money [she]_186-jameson wants , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i mutter dryly . “ What does [she]_186-jameson want ? ”_[2959-i] “ Things . . . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown as [I]_2959-i try to articulate [my]_2959-i thoughts . “ Things . . . [I]_2959-i ’m incapable of giving [her]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] “ Like what ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ Time . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan stares at [me]_2959-i , lost . “ But [you]_2430-tristan committed to [Claudia]_57-claudia no problem . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i raise [my]_2959-i eyebrows as [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i scotch . “ What does that mean ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i did n’t care if [Claudia]_57-claudia was waiting at [home]_2289-home for [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i did n’t care how much time [I]_2959-i spent away from [her]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i could travel , work , focus . . . [I]_2959-i was content to put [her]_186-jameson fourth or fifth in line , and [she]_186-jameson never expected anything different . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i exhale heavily . [I]_2959-i feel the weight of the world on [my]_2959-i shoulders . “ [Claudia]_57-claudia was easy . ”_[2959-i] “ Because [you]_57-claudia did n’t really love [her]_57-claudia ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug , unable to put a label on [my]_2959-i feelings . [He]_2959-i puts [his]_2959-i hand on [my]_2959-i shoulder . “ [You]_57-claudia ’re more than [a CEO]_{3334-a ceo} , [Jameson]_186-jameson . [You]_57-claudia deserve to be happy too . Why do [you]_57-claudia think it has to be one or the other ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown , pained . “ Do n’t let the love of [your]_57-claudia life walk away because [you]_57-claudia ’re scared that [you]_57-claudia ’re going to lose [her]_57-claudia . ”_[2959-i] “ It ’s inevitable , [Tristan]_2430-tristan . . . eventually , [she]_57-claudia will leave . [Her]_57-claudia hand will be forced . ”_[2959-i] “ And then what will [you]_57-claudia be ? ”_[2959-i] [he]_2959-i snaps . “ [A lonely , stressed - out , alcoholic CEO]_{3334-a ceo} ? ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes rise to meet [his]_2959-i . “ Oh , wait . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i gestures to [my]_2959-i drink . “ That ’s already happening . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i shakes [his]_2959-i head in disgust . “ When [I]_2959-i find [[my]_2959-i woman]_57-claudia , [I]_2959-i ’ll move [heaven]_3336-heaven and hell to keep [her]_57-claudia . ”_[2959-i] “ Get out . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sigh . “ [You]_57-claudia have no idea what [you]_57-claudia ’re fucking talking about . ”_[2959-i] “ Actually , [I]_2959-i ’m kind of glad [I]_2959-i ’m getting to watch [you]_57-claudia fuck up [your]_57-claudia life , ”_[2959-i] [he]_2959-i calls as [he]_2959-i walks toward the door . “ Now [I]_2959-i know what not to do . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i scotch as the door slams hard behind [him]_2959-i . [My]_2959-i buzzer on [my]_2959-i desk sounds , and [I]_2959-i push the button . “ Yes , [Sammia]_246-alan . ”_[2959-i] “ [The detectives]_{3271-the detectives} are here to see [you]_246-alan , [sir]_246-alan . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i drain [my]_2959-i glass . . . good , a distraction . “ Thank [you]_246-alan , send [them]_{3271-the detectives} in . ”_{[186-jameson]} [Emily]_186-jameson “ A toast . ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly smiles as [she]_198-molly holds [her]_198-molly glass up . [Aaron]_0-aaron and [I]_2959-i hold [our]_2020-we glasses up to touch [hers]_186-jameson . “ To new beginnings . ”_[0-aaron] “ To new beginnings , ”_[2020-we] [we]_2020-we all repeat . “ [You]_246-alan ’re going to be great . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron smiles . “ [You]_246-alan watch — [you’ll]_246-alan be taking over the news floor within no time . ”_[0-aaron] [We]_2020-we ’re out to dinner in [a bar]_{2485-a bar} and celebrating . [I]_2959-i start [my]_2959-i new job tomorrow . It ’s been a week since [I]_2959-i left [Miles Media]_{14-miles media} . Feels like a lifetime ago . [I]_2959-i was going to go [home]_2289-home and see [[my]_2959-i parents]_{1038-my parents} , but [I]_2959-i just did n’t have the mental energy . [I]_2959-i stayed [home]_2289-home for some self - love instead . [I]_2959-i needed time alone to lick [my]_2959-i wounds and heal . [I]_2959-i had a few massages , got some [Reiki]_225-reiki done to calm [my]_2959-i heartache , ate healthy , and went for two runs a day to exhaust [myself]_2959-i so that [my]_2959-i body had no choice but to sleep at night . [I]_2959-i ’m okay . . . empty , but doing okay . [I]_2959-i ’ve stopped reading the paper so that [I]_2959-i do n’t have to see [his]_225-reiki name . On [my]_2959-i runs , [I]_2959-i go the other way so [I]_2959-i do n’t have to see [the Miles Media building]_{521-the miles media building} or [restaurants]_{2621-restaurants} or anything that would remind [me]_2959-i of [him]_225-reiki or [our]_2026-our time together . [Him]_225-reiki . . . [I]_2959-i ca n’t even bring [myself]_2959-i to say [his]_225-reiki name . [He]_225-reiki ’s been put into [the vault]_{2027-the vault} , and [nobody]_2321-nobody dares mentioning [him]_225-reiki to [me]_2959-i . It ’s like [he]_225-reiki never existed . . . and maybe [he]_225-reiki never did . “ What are [you]_3338-you wearing tomorrow ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly asks as [she]_198-molly cuts into [her]_198-molly steak . “ [I]_198-molly thought [my]_198-molly navy suit . ”_[198-molly] [I]_2959-i chew [my]_2959-i food . “ [I]_2959-i want to look professional and smart . ”_[2959-i] “ No gray skirt ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron smirks . [I]_2959-i wipe [my]_2959-i mouth with [my]_2959-i napkin . “ [I]_2959-i threw that fucker out . ”_[2959-i] “ What ? ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly shrieks . “ [I]_198-molly loved that skirt ! [I]_198-molly would have had it . ”_[198-molly] “ That was a troublemaking skirt , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reply . “ Trust [me]_2959-i ; [you]_2959-i do n’t want that kind of negativity in [your]_2959-i life . ”_[2959-i] “ Here , here . ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron lifts [his]_0-aaron glass , and [we]_2029-we clink again . “ [Michael]_60-michael asked [me]_198-molly out on a date on Saturday night , ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly says casually . [My]_2959-i knife and fork hit the plate with a clang as [my]_2959-i eyes rise to meet [hers]_2030-i . “ What ? ”_[2030-i] [She]_2030-i shrugs . “ [I]_2030-i do n’t know what to make of it , really . ”_[2030-i] “ Did [he]_2030-i ask [you]_2959-i out for a casual dinner ? Are [you]_2959-i sure it ’s a date ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron frowns . “ No , [his]_2030-i exact words were , ‘ Would [you]_2959-i like to come out on a date on Saturday night ? ’ ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . “ Are [you]_2959-i going to go ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2030-i do n’t know . ”_[2030-i] [She]_2030-i sighs . “ So much water has passed under the bridge between [us]_3339-us . [We]_3339-us ’ve just got to a place of trust and friendship again . [I]_2030-i do n’t want to ruin it . ”_[2030-i] “ By fucking [him]_0-aaron ? ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron smirks as [he]_0-aaron bites into [his]_0-aaron food . “ Well , if [I]_681-guys did fuck [him]_0-aaron , and [he]_0-aaron did n’t use double Viagra on [me]_681-guys , [I]_681-guys would be mortally offended . [I]_681-guys know what tricks [he]_0-aaron has in [his]_0-aaron toolbox now . ”_[681-guys] [We]_681-guys all giggle . “ God , that night was funny , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i add , remembering [him]_0-aaron passing out from all the blood in [his]_0-aaron dick . [Molly]_198-molly rolls [her]_198-molly eyes . “ For [you]_0-aaron , maybe . ”_[198-molly] [We]_681-guys fall silent as [we]_681-guys eat . “ Good luck for tomorrow , [babe]_0-aaron , ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron says . “ Thanks , [guys]_681-guys . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . “ [You]_681-guys are the best two things about [New York]_{385-new york} . ”_[2959-i] “ [God]_0-aaron , [you]_681-guys ’re so right , ”_[198-molly] [Molly]_198-molly mutters into [her]_198-molly glass . “ And these margaritas . ”_[198-molly] [She]_198-molly raises [her]_198-molly glass to show [me]_2959-i . “ So should [I]_198-molly go out with [Mike]_60-michael ? ”_[198-molly] “ Yes , ”_[0-aaron] [Aaron]_0-aaron and [I]_2959-i gasp . “ Go . ”_[0-aaron] “ [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_[200-athena] [Athena]_200-athena smiles as [she]_200-athena wraps [her]_200-athena arms around [me]_2959-i . “ It ’s so good to see [you]_186-jameson . Welcome . ”_[200-athena] “ Hi . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile nervously . “ [You]_186-jameson ’re going to love it here . ”_[200-athena] [She]_200-athena pulls [me]_2959-i through [the office]_{2452-your office} by the hand . “ Here is [[your]_186-jameson office]_{2452-your office} . ”_[200-athena] [I]_2959-i smile , surprised . “ [I]_2959-i get [[my]_2959-i own office]_{2452-your office} ? ”_[2959-i] “ Of course [you]_186-jameson do . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i look around [the little office]_{2452-your office} . It ’s definitely no management top floor , but it suits [me]_2959-i just fine . There ’s a window and a desk and a chair in [the corner]_{672-the corner} . It ’s kind of homey . [I]_2959-i turn to [her]_200-athena . “ Thank [you]_186-jameson for taking [me]_200-athena on . [I]_200-athena am so grateful . ”_[200-athena] [Athena]_200-athena smiles and rubs [my]_2959-i arm . When [I]_2959-i called [her]_200-athena asking for a job , [she]_200-athena never once asked what happened with [Miles Media]_{68-miles media} or [my]_2959-i relationship with [Jameson]_186-jameson . But [I]_2959-i know that [she]_200-athena knows that [I]_2959-i ’m probably broken with nowhere else to go , and running [home]_2289-home with [my]_2959-i tail between [my]_2959-i legs is n’t an option . [She]_200-athena ’s right . [I]_2959-i ’m going to make it up to [her]_200-athena ; [I]_2959-i ’m going to be [the best damn reporter that [she]_200-athena has ever had]_{2035-the best damn reporter that she has ever had} . “ [I]_200-athena ’ll leave [you]_200-athena to it . ”_[200-athena] [She]_200-athena smiles . “ Staff meeting at ten to introduce [you]_200-athena to [everyone]_{2304-everyone} . [We]_{2304-everyone} have welcome doughnuts . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . “ Thanks , that would be great . ”_[200-athena] [She]_200-athena disappears down [the corridor]_{609-the corridor} , and [I]_2959-i take a seat at [my]_2959-i new desk and look around the lonely space . [I]_2959-i miss [Molly]_198-molly and [Aaron]_0-aaron . . . and the buzz of [Miles Media]_{14-miles media} . [Jameson]_186-jameson “ With this projection here , the forecast is a growth of ten percent over the next eighteen months . ”_[212-harry] [Harrison]_212-harry from finance taps the graph on the projector whiteboard as [he]_212-harry addresses the board meeting . The table is alive with chatter and enthusiasm . The comeback strategy from the drama over the last four months is alive and well . [Me]_2959-i . . . [I]_2959-i ’m miles away . [I]_2959-i ca n’t concentrate . . . [I]_2959-i ca n’t think . . . [I]_2959-i feel like [I]_2959-i ca n’t breathe . Maybe [I]_2959-i ’m not okay . [Emily]_186-jameson started [her]_186-jameson new job today , and [I]_2959-i wanted to call [her]_186-jameson and wish [her]_186-jameson luck . [I]_2959-i could n’t sleep thinking about it and even picked up the phone a few times . [I]_2959-i drop [my]_2959-i head . But what ’s the point . . . [I]_2959-i wonder if [she]_186-jameson ran this morning . Did [she]_186-jameson wear [her]_186-jameson runners that [she]_186-jameson said have motors on [them]_2037-they ? [I]_2959-i smile softly to [myself]_2959-i as [I]_2959-i remember [Elliot]_140-elliot thinking [I]_2959-i was talking about [Zuckerberg]_{188-zuckerberg} having [the motorized runners]_{2038-the motorized runners} . [Idiot]_226-idiot . . . [I]_2959-i twist in [my]_2959-i chair to stretch [my]_2959-i back . [I]_2959-i need a massage . [Emily]_186-jameson does n’t like [me]_2959-i getting massages . [I]_2959-i think back to the kind of massages [I]_2959-i used to get , and it seems like another lifetime ago . BE — Before [Emily]_186-jameson . . . stop it . “ [Jameson]_186-jameson will be addressing that in the morning . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i look up , lost . What are [they]_2037-they talking about ? [The board members]_{2039-the board members} around the table all stare at [me]_2959-i as [they]_2037-they wait for [my]_2959-i reply . [My]_2959-i eyes flick to [Tristan]_2430-tristan for guidance . “ When [you]_3341-you fly to [Seattle]_4-seattle tonight . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan raises [his]_2430-tristan eyebrows as a gentle reminder . “ Yes . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i nod . “ That ’s right . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan is limping [me]_2959-i through work at the moment , well aware of [my]_2959-i state of mind . The meeting continues , and [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i water to try and bring [my]_2959-i mind back to where it needs to be . This is n’t good enough , [Jameson]_186-jameson . Focus . [I]_2959-i walk onto [the plane]_{268-the plane} . “ Good evening , [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} . [Your]_{79-mr. miles} seat is here , [sir]_186-jameson . 1A. ”_[2959-i] “ Thank [you]_{79-mr. miles} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i fall into the seat in the front row of first class . [The plane]_{268-the plane} slowly boards , and [I]_2959-i stare out the window . Flying never used to bother [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i hate it now . [I]_2959-i hate that it reminds [me]_2959-i of [her]_2041-her . . . of how [we]_2042-we met . Of the night [we]_2042-we had together . Of how badly things turned out in the end . With [my]_2959-i elbow leaning on the armrest , [I]_2959-i pinch the bridge of [my]_2959-i nose . [I]_2959-i just want to get there and go to [[my]_2959-i hotel]_{2043-my hotel} and sleep . [I]_2959-i ’m tired and not in the mood for this shit . “ Can [I]_2959-i get [you]_2959-i anything , [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} ? ”_[2959-i] “ Scotch , please . ”_{[2044-an elderly man]} [An elderly man]_{2044-an elderly man} takes the seat next to [me]_2959-i . [He]_{2044-an elderly man} nods . “ Hello . ”_{[2044-an elderly man]} “ Hi . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . [I]_2959-i turn [my]_2959-i attention out the window to the baggage crew down on the tarmac , all doing [their]_2045-their job and rushing around doing the safety checks . [They]_2045-their ’re driving on carts , flashing lights , and waving flags . [I]_2959-i would n’t even care if [the plane]_{268-the plane} fucking crashed . Burning in hell would be better than this . Four days later [I]_2959-i smile at [Alan]_246-alan as [he]_246-alan stands next to [the limo at [the airport]_{254-the airport}]_{2047-the limo at the airport} . “ Hello , [sir]_246-alan . Did [you]_246-alan have a nice trip ? ”_[246-alan] “ It was fine ; thank [you]_246-alan . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile as [I]_2959-i get into the back seat . “ Would [you]_246-alan like to do the normal route , [sir]_246-alan ? ”_{[2044-an elderly man]} [he]_{2044-an elderly man} asks through the door . “ Yes , please . ”_{[2044-an elderly man]} [He]_{2044-an elderly man} smiles . “ Very well . ”_{[2044-an elderly man]} [He]_{2044-an elderly man} shuts the door , and moments later , [the car]_{369-the car} pulls out into the traffic . Half an hour later , [he]_{2044-an elderly man} slows down as [we]_2050-we drive past [[Emily]_186-jameson ’s apartment]_{385-new york} , and [I]_2959-i peer through the window . Is [she]_186-jameson [there]_{385-new york} ? [We]_2050-we do this every night on the way [home]_2289-home — [my]_2959-i own stupid way of saying good night to [her]_186-jameson . . . if [I]_2959-i do n’t , [I]_2959-i end up running back [here]_{385-new york} later . Who am [I]_2959-i kidding ? [I]_2959-i run back here most nights anyway . [I]_2959-i hold [my]_2959-i breath as [we]_2050-we drive past , hoping to catch a glimpse of [her]_186-jameson . . . [I]_2959-i ’ve never seen [her]_186-jameson once . [My]_2959-i heart drops ; [she]_186-jameson ’s not here . [I]_2959-i look back through the back window as [we]_2050-we disappear down [the street]_{550-the street} . [Emily]_186-jameson . . . where are [you]_186-jameson ? [Emily]_186-jameson [I]_2959-i sit on [the bus]_{2054-the bus} on [my]_2959-i way [home]_2289-home from work and read [my]_2959-i Kindle . It ’s dark and just around six o’clock in the evening . [I]_2959-i ’m happier . . . stronger . [I]_2959-i ’ve been at [my]_2959-i new job for three weeks , and [I]_2959-i love it . [I]_2959-i did the right thing . [People]_248-people are all really lovely , and thankfully , [I]_2959-i ’m not the office gossip anymore , and [I]_2959-i have a more integral role than [I]_2959-i did at [Miles Media]_{14-miles media} . [I]_2959-i still see [Molly]_198-molly and [Aaron]_0-aaron all the time for drinks and dinner , and [I]_2959-i ’ve planned to go [home]_2289-home for the weekend . [I]_2959-i ’m running a lot . . . funnily enough [I]_2959-i do n’t need to pretend [a man with [an ax]_{2058-an ax}]_{2057-a man with an ax} is chasing [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i ’m so angry that [I]_2959-i ca n’t help but sprint . Gleeful jogging is no longer in [my]_2959-i repertoire . [The bus]_{2054-the bus} slows . [I]_2959-i close [my]_2959-i Kindle and stand as [I]_2959-i wait for [the bus]_{2054-the bus} to stop . [I]_2959-i climb down the steps and begin to walk the two blocks to [[my]_2959-i apartment]_{766-my apartment} . The season is getting colder . [Fog]_227-fog puffs as [I]_2959-i breathe , and [I]_2959-i wrap [my]_2959-i large coat around [me]_2959-i for warmth as [I]_2959-i stride it out . [I]_2959-i might have [Indian]_228-indian for dinner . No . . . stick to [your]_2061-your budget ; there are leftovers in the fridge from last night . [I]_2959-i approach [[my]_2959-i building]_{703-my building} and fumble around in [my]_2959-i bag for [my]_2959-i keys . “ Hello , [Em]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] a voice says from behind [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i turn , startled . [Jameson]_186-jameson stands before [me]_2959-i , and the sight of [him]_186-jameson tightens [my]_2959-i chest . “ What are [you]_186-jameson doing here ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson eyes search [mine]_2959-i . “ [I]_186-jameson had to see [you]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} The sight of [him]_186-jameson brings an unexpected wave of emotion that [I]_2959-i previously thought [I]_2959-i had under control . [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_186-jameson through tears . [He]_186-jameson carefully steps forward . “ How are [you]_186-jameson ? ”_{[186-jameson]} Suddenly , [I]_2959-i ’m furious . . . like a raging bull , and [I]_2959-i drop [my]_2959-i head and fumble through [my]_2959-i bag . [I]_2959-i need to get away from [him]_186-jameson . Where are [my]_2959-i fucking keys ? “ Fine , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . [I]_2959-i find [my]_2959-i keys and turn toward the door . “ [I]_2959-i miss [you]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stop and close [my]_2959-i eyes . “ [I]_186-jameson ca n’t . . . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson pauses . “ [I]_186-jameson ca n’t move on until [I]_186-jameson know [we]_2063-we ’re okay . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i frown and turn back toward [him]_186-jameson . [His]_186-jameson face is pained , and [he]_186-jameson appears nervous . [Our]_2063-we eyes are locked , [mine]_2959-i filled with tears . . . [his]_186-jameson with regret . [He]_186-jameson turns back and looks at [[his]_186-jameson car]_{369-the car} , which [I]_2959-i did n’t notice parked in the dark . “ [I]_186-jameson brought [you]_186-jameson something . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson nearly runs to [the car]_{369-the car} and then retrieves a huge bouquet of yellow roses and walks back and passes them to [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_186-jameson in confusion . “ Yellow roses ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson smiles softly . “ Yellow roses are supposed to symbolize friendship . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [You]_186-jameson want to be [[my]_186-jameson friend]_186-jameson ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson nods hopefully . “ [We]_3342-we can start fresh ? ”_{[186-jameson]} Something snaps deep inside of [me]_2959-i . “ [You]_186-jameson ’ve got a fucking nerve , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sneer . [His]_186-jameson face falls . “ [You]_186-jameson waltz back here after breaking [my]_2959-i fucking heart and give [me]_2959-i yellow fucking roses ! ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i scream . [He]_186-jameson steps back , shocked by [my]_2959-i venom . “ [I]_186-jameson would n’t be [friends]_394-friends with [a selfish prick like [you]_186-jameson if [you]_186-jameson were [the last fucking person on [earth]_872-earth]_{3344-a selfish prick like you if you were the last fucking person on earth}]_{3344-a selfish prick like you if you were the last fucking person on earth} ! ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i yell as the angry tears run down [my]_2959-i face . [I]_2959-i completely lose control and start ripping the roses to shreds , and [I]_2959-i break the heads and smash them up and then throw [them]_2065-them on the ground and jump and stomp on [them]_2065-them . [I]_2959-i want to hurt these stupid roses like [he]_186-jameson ’s hurt [me]_2959-i . [His]_186-jameson haunted eyes watch on . Adrenaline is coursing through [my]_2959-i body , and still unsatisfied with the state of the roses , [I]_2959-i pick [them]_2065-them up and walk out to [the road]_{533-the road} and throw [them]_2065-them as hard as [I]_2959-i can out onto [the asphalt]_{2067-the asphalt} . [A passing bus]_{2068-a passing bus} runs [them]_2065-them over . “ That ’s what [you]_3346-you can do with [your]_3346-you friendship , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sneer as [I]_2959-i stomp past [him]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i open the door and walk into [the building]_{361-the building} without looking back . [I]_2959-i hit the elevator button with force , and [I]_2959-i can see [him]_186-jameson standing at the glass door , watching [me]_2959-i , in [my]_2959-i peripheral vision . Tears are streaming down [my]_2959-i face , and [I]_2959-i ’m furious that [I]_2959-i let [him]_186-jameson see how crazy [I]_2959-i am . How crazy [he]_186-jameson ’s made [me]_2959-i . [The elevator]_{375-the elevator} doors open , and [I]_2959-i march in and hit the door button . The doors close , and [I]_2959-i screw up [my]_2959-i face in tears and sob out loud . Damn [you]_2071-you , [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson . . . Chapter 24 There are moments in [your]_2071-you life that [you]_2071-you know [you]_2071-you will remember forever . Certain situations that are poignant and have shaped who [you]_2071-you are . Last night was [one of [them]_2073-them]_{2784-one of them} . What kind of psycho rips roses to shreds with [her]_2074-her bare hands while screaming like [a lunatic]_{2075-a lunatic} ? Shame runs through [me]_2959-i . This . . . is the level [I]_2959-i ’ve stooped to . Strangely enough , last night was the first time [I]_2959-i ’ve slept well in weeks . As if releasing a little of the steam in the pressure cooker has somehow calmed [my]_2959-i soul . [I]_2959-i do n’t feel guilty for being so mean . . . normally , [I]_2959-i would . But [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson is an enigma all of [his]_186-jameson own . . . one that [I]_2959-i can no longer pity . “ [I]_2959-i would n’t be [[friends]_394-friends with a selfish prick like [you]_3349-you if [you]_3349-you were [the last person left on [earth]_872-earth]_{3350-the last person left on earth}]_{3348-friends with a selfish prick like you if you were the last person left on earth} , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i said . . . screamed actually . It was a mean thing to say — the worst — but [he]_186-jameson got what [he]_186-jameson fucking deserved . The doors of [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} in [[my]_2959-i building]_{703-my building} open , and [I]_2959-i step out into [the foyer]_{670-the foyer} and walk out into [the street]_{550-the street} . “ What the hell happened here ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i hear [the woman in front of [me]_2959-i]_{2080-the woman in front of me} mutter under [her]_{2080-the woman in front of me} breath as [she]_{2080-the woman in front of me} stops and looks around at the carnage . There are yellow rose petals strewn everywhere ; flower buds that are squashed and bruised lie on the concrete . Out on the road the carcass of the flattened bouquet with the big cream satin bow lies . Jesus . . . [I]_2959-i drop [my]_2959-i head and stomp past the crazy . [I]_2959-i glance up at the ceiling to see where the cameras are . [I]_2959-i wonder if [anyone]_272-anyone saw it on the security footage . [I]_2959-i hope not . . . how embarrassing . [I]_2959-i get on [[my]_2959-i bus]_{2905-my bus} and open [my]_2959-i Kindle . [I]_2959-i ’m not reading [my]_2959-i usual rom - com genre . [I]_2959-i ca n’t stand the thought of all that love bullshit . [I]_2959-i ’m mixing it up and reading [Pet Sematary]_{229-pet sematary} — maybe that ’s it . Maybe [Steven King]_{230-steven king} is taking [me]_2959-i to the dark side . The side where [you]_2083-you do n’t take shit , and payback on yellow roses is due . Good for [him]_{230-steven king} . . . bring it the fuck on . [I]_2959-i swipe to the next page . [Every dog]_{2084-every dog} has its day . [Jameson]_186-jameson [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i coffee as [I]_2959-i sit in the café across [the street]_{550-the street} from [Miles Media]_{14-miles media} . [I]_2959-i ’ve been coming here the last few days before work . [Alan]_246-alan told [me]_2959-i that [Emily]_186-jameson used to come here with [[her]_186-jameson friends]_{2086-her friends} . [I]_2959-i ’m hoping to run into [one of [them]_{2086-her friends}]_{2784-one of them} . Why ? [I]_2959-i do n’t know . [Emily]_186-jameson ’s words from last night are playing over and over in [my]_2959-i mind . [I]_2959-i would n’t be [friends]_394-friends with a selfish prick like [you]_2089-you if [you]_2089-you were [the last person on [earth]_872-earth]_{2090-the last person on earth} . . . [I]_2959-i would n’t want to be friends with [me]_2959-i either if [I]_2959-i were [her]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i ’ve never seen [her]_186-jameson so angry . . . or thin . [She]_186-jameson ’s lost a lot of weight . [I]_2959-i hate that [I]_2959-i ’ve put [her]_186-jameson through this shit . [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i coffee , and [I]_2959-i feel a hand rest on [my]_2959-i shoulder . “ Hey , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan says as [he]_2430-tristan sits down beside [me]_2959-i on a stool . “ Hi . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ Looking for [Emily]_186-jameson ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} [he]_2430-tristan says casually . “ Nope . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ Liar , ”_{[2430-tristan]} [he]_2430-tristan replies with a cheeky grin . “ Hey , [the boys]_{801-the boys} and [I]_2959-i have organized a trip to [Vegas]_27-vegas for [us]_3353-us this weekend . [The jet]_{3354-the jet} ’s all lined up . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i screw up [my]_2959-i face . [I]_2959-i could think of nothing worse . “ It ’ll be great . Drinking , gambling . Join [some beautiful women to [the Miles - High Club]_{7-the miles - high club}]_{3355-some beautiful women to the miles - high club} . [You]_3356-you need to snap out of this and get back on the horse . [I]_2430-tristan ’m thinking [a blonde or two]_{3357-a blonde or two} . . . forget about [the brunettes]_{3358-the brunettes} for a while , and besides , [we]_3353-us need to celebrate [your]_3356-you innocence . [Elliot]_140-elliot and [Christopher]_{141-christopher} fly in on Friday . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan winks as [he]_2430-tristan tries to sweeten the deal . “ Yeah , that sounds completely shit , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i mutter dryly . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t care what [you]_2959-i say . [You]_2959-i ’re coming . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stare straight ahead . [I]_2959-i ’ve lost the ability to get excited about anything lately . [He]_2430-tristan falls serious . “ [I]_2430-tristan ’m worried about [you]_2959-i , [Jay]_108-jay . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes . “ [We]_3359-we all are . [You]_2959-i ’re acting completely out of character . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i ’m fine , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i murmur into [my]_2959-i coffee . [I]_2959-i look around once more , remembering why [I]_2959-i ’m here . “ Why do n’t [you]_2959-i just go to [[her]_3360-her house]_{1323-her house} if [you]_2959-i want to see [her]_3360-her ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} [he]_2430-tristan says . “ [I]_2430-tristan tried that last night . ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ How did it go ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i puff air into [my]_2959-i cheeks . “ [She]_3360-her went postal and . . . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pause as [I]_2959-i try to explain the situation . “ [I]_2959-i took [her]_3360-her yellow roses , and [she]_3360-her smashed the fuck out of them like [a madman]_{3286-a madman} . ”_[2959-i] “ Yeah ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan smirks and then smiles broadly as if impressed . “ Why would [you]_2959-i take [her]_3360-her yellow roses and not red ones ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ [I]_2959-i thought . . . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i exhale heavily . “ [I]_2959-i thought yellow was safe , signifying friendship so that [she]_3360-her would talk to [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i just wanted to talk to [her]_3360-her . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_2959-i did n’t tell [her]_3360-her that , though , did [you]_2959-i ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ Yeah . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [He]_2430-tristan gives a subtle shake of the head as if [I]_2959-i ’m stupid . “ How did that go down ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ That ’s about the time [she]_3360-her turned into [the Hulk]_{3363-the hulk} . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i do n’t blame [her]_3360-her , to be honest . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes flick to [him]_2430-tristan in question . “ [You]_2959-i well and truly fucked [her]_3360-her over . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i did not fuck [her]_3360-her over , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i spit . “ [I]_2959-i ’m trying to protect [her]_3360-her . ”_[2959-i] “ Listen , [you]_2959-i can lie to [yourself]_2959-i all [you]_2959-i want to . But do n’t bother lying to [me]_2959-i . [You]_2959-i ’re [a bad liar]_2959-i . . . the worst . ”_[2959-i] “ Fuck off , [man]_2959-i ; it ’s too early for this shit . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sigh . “ [Tristan]_2430-tristan , ”_{[2092-the girl behind the counter]} [the girl behind the counter]_{2092-the girl behind the counter} calls . [He]_2430-tristan stands and gets [his]_2430-tristan coffee and slaps [me]_2959-i on the back . “ [You]_2959-i staying [here]_{385-new york} , being [a miserable prick]_{3365-a miserable prick} ? ”_{[2430-tristan]} “ Fuck off , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i grunt . [He]_2430-tristan smiles and leaves without another word . [I]_2959-i exhale heavily and stare back down at [my]_2959-i coffee . [I]_2959-i get a vision of the hurt on [Emily]_186-jameson ’s face last night , and [my]_2959-i chest constricts . [I]_2959-i keep going over and over it in [my]_2959-i mind , and [I]_2959-i just want to know that [she]_186-jameson ’s all right . Maybe then [I]_2959-i can forgive [myself]_2959-i and stop thinking about [her]_186-jameson every minute of every day . [I]_2959-i take out [my]_2959-i phone . [I]_2959-i ’ll call [her]_186-jameson . No , [she]_186-jameson will only hang up . [I]_2959-i ’ll text . . . what will [I]_2959-i write ? Good morning . Murder any roses today ? [I]_2959-i hit send and wait . [I]_2959-i drink [my]_2959-i coffee and stare at [my]_2959-i phone as [I]_2959-i wait for [her]_186-jameson to reply . . . [she]_186-jameson does n’t . Twenty minutes later , [I]_2959-i text [her]_186-jameson again . Please talk to [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i order another coffee as [I]_2959-i wait . It ’s 8:15 a.m. , and [I]_2959-i know [she]_186-jameson has n’t started work yet . [I]_2959-i also know that [she]_186-jameson would have [her]_186-jameson phone on [her]_186-jameson and is purposely ignoring [my]_2959-i texts . Fuck this . [I]_2959-i dial [her]_186-jameson number , and it rings . . . [I]_2959-i close [my]_2959-i eyes as [I]_2959-i wait . It rings and then declines . Fuck . [She]_186-jameson hit reject . [I]_2959-i text [her]_186-jameson . Answer [your]_2093-your phone or [I]_2959-i ’m coming over there . [My]_2959-i text does n’t go through . . . huh ? [I]_2959-i call again , and the call wo n’t connect . What ’s going on ? [I]_2959-i try again . . . nothing . For ten minutes , [I]_2959-i continue to try to get through . [I]_2959-i ca n’t . What ’s going on ? [I]_2959-i type into Google , “ Why ca n’t [I]_2959-i text or call [someone]_2326-someone ? ”_[2959-i] The answer bounces back that cuts to the bone . “ [You]_2093-your ’ve been blocked . ”_{[186-jameson]} [She]_186-jameson blocked [my]_2959-i number ? What the fuck ? Anger surges through [me]_2959-i ; [nobody]_2321-nobody has ever blocked [me]_2959-i before . Not in business or personal . . . and never [a woman]_{339-a woman} . [She]_186-jameson really does n’t want to be [friends]_394-friends with [me]_2959-i . . . in any shape or form . [My]_2959-i heart sinks . How the hell did [I]_2959-i fuck this up so badly ? [I]_2959-i stare at [the Miles Media building]_{521-the miles media building} through the window , and the thought of going there today and playing the facade that everything ’s okay is just too much . [I]_2959-i text [Tristan]_2430-tristan . [I]_2959-i ’m taking the day off . See [you]_2430-tristan tomorrow . [I]_2959-i sit and finish [my]_2959-i coffee , and a song comes on—“Bad Liar ”_[2959-i] by [Imagine Dragons]_{231-imagine dragons} . [I]_2959-i listen . . . [Tristan]_2430-tristan just called [me]_2959-i a bad liar , and ironically , the lyrics ring true . With a sad damnation to hell , [I]_2959-i drag [myself]_2959-i out of the café and into [a cab]_{712-the cab} . “ Where to ? ”_{[2099-the cab driver]} [the cab driver]_{2099-the cab driver} asks . “ [Park Avenue]_{16-park avenue} . ”_{[2099-the cab driver]} [The cab]_{712-the cab} pulls out into the traffic , and [I]_2959-i put [my]_2959-i headphones in , hit Spotify , and listen to the song again . “ Bad Liar ”_[2959-i] . . . [my]_2959-i new anthem . [I]_2959-i flick through the travel images on Google . [I]_2959-i ’m going to take a skiing trip . [Switzerland]_{47-switzerland} , [I]_2959-i think . [I]_2959-i need to get away . [New York]_{385-new york} is just too small . . . or suffocating . . . or life threatening . . . or something that [I]_2959-i just ca n’t quite put [my]_2959-i finger on . Either way , [I]_2959-i ’m getting the hell out of [here]_{385-new york} . [She]_{2099-the cab driver} blocked [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i might work from [London]_6-london for a while . . . yeah , [I]_2959-i could do that . Would make sense . And [I]_2959-i would get to spend more time with [Elliot]_140-elliot and [Christopher]_{141-christopher} . [My]_2959-i heart drops as [I]_2959-i remember [someone else who lives in [London]_6-london]_{2100-someone else who lives in london} . [I]_2959-i ’d be closer to [Claudia]_57-claudia , and [I]_2959-i broke [her]_57-claudia heart the other day again too . [She]_57-claudia wanted [me]_2959-i back , and [I]_2959-i told [her]_57-claudia that [I]_2959-i do n’t think [I]_2959-i ever loved [her]_57-claudia . . . [she]_57-claudia got angry , and basically , it ’s a fucked - up situation all around . No , [I]_2959-i ca n’t work out of [London]_6-london . . . too complicated . Scratch that idea . How long will [I]_2959-i go to [Switzerland]_{47-switzerland} for ? [I]_2959-i go over the dates . Maybe a month ? Hmm . . . [I]_2959-i bring up [my]_2959-i work diary and begin to go through it . [I]_2959-i ’m owed a lot of holidays , and [I]_2959-i guess [I]_2959-i may as well take some . [My]_2959-i security phone goes off , and [I]_2959-i answer . “ Hello . ”_[2959-i] “ Good afternoon , [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} . [Mrs. Miles]_0-aaron is here in [the foyer]_{670-the foyer} to see [you]_0-aaron . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i close [my]_2959-i eyes . Shit . “ Yes , thank [you]_0-aaron . Please let [her]_{356-my mother} in . ”_[2959-i] Moments later the elevator doors open , and [[my]_2959-i mother]_{356-my mother} steps out . [Her]_{356-my mother} face lights up when [she]_{356-my mother} sees [me]_2959-i . “ Hello , [darling]_0-aaron . ”_{[356-my mother]} “ Hi , [Mom]_70-mom . ”_{[356-my mother]} [She]_{356-my mother} takes [me]_2959-i into [her]_{356-my mother} arms and holds [me]_2959-i close for a moment as if sensing something is off . “ What are [you]_0-aaron doing here ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile as [I]_2959-i pull out of [her]_{356-my mother} arms . “ [I]_{356-my mother} should ask [you]_0-aaron the same thing , ”_{[356-my mother]} [she]_{356-my mother} replies as [she]_{356-my mother} follows [me]_2959-i and sits down on the couch . “ [I]_{356-my mother} just . . . ”_{[356-my mother]} [I]_2959-i pause as [I]_2959-i try to articulate [my]_2959-i lie . “ [I]_{356-my mother} just need some time off after all that embezzlement shit . ”_{[356-my mother]} [Her]_{356-my mother} eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ Good , [I]_{356-my mother} ’m glad . ”_{[356-my mother]} “ Can [I]_2959-i get [you]_2959-i anything ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stand , uncomfortable lying to [her]_{356-my mother} . “ Some tea , please , [darling]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i walk into [the kitchen]_{683-the kitchen} and begin to make [her]_{356-my mother} tea . [I]_2959-i take out [her]_{356-my mother} fine china pink - and - gold teapot and cup , the one [she]_{356-my mother} always drinks from when [she]_{356-my mother} ’s here . [She]_{356-my mother} follows [me]_2959-i and sits at the kitchen counter . “ Did [Tristan]_2430-tristan send [you]_2959-i ? ”_{[356-my mother]} [I]_2959-i ask with [my]_2959-i back to [her]_{356-my mother} . “ [He]_2430-tristan ’s worried about [you]_2959-i . ”_{[356-my mother]} “ [I]_{356-my mother} ’m fine , [Mom]_70-mom . ”_{[356-my mother]} “ [I]_{356-my mother} ’ll be [the judge of that]_{3368-the judge of that} . What ’s going on with [Emily]_186-jameson ? ”_{[356-my mother]} “ Nothing . ”_{[356-my mother]} “ Why not ? ”_{[356-my mother]} “ [Emily]_186-jameson and [I]_{356-my mother} are n’t together anymore . ”_{[356-my mother]} “ Because ? ”_{[356-my mother]} [I]_2959-i keep making the tea . “ Look at [me]_2959-i , [Jameson]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i drag [my]_2959-i eyes to [hers]_{356-my mother} . “ Why are n’t [you]_2959-i with [Emily]_186-jameson anymore ? ”_{[356-my mother]} [she]_{356-my mother} asks . “ [Emily]_186-jameson deserves better . ”_{[356-my mother]} [She]_{356-my mother} watches [me]_2959-i . “ [Ferrara]_2430-tristan . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown as [I]_2959-i get [my]_2959-i wording right . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t want this life for [her]_{356-my mother} . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_2959-i do n’t want [her]_{356-my mother} being with a workaholic , [you]_2959-i mean ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug as [I]_2959-i pass [her]_{356-my mother} the cup of tea . “ So , [you]_2959-i ended it with [her]_{356-my mother} . . . for [her]_{356-my mother} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i purse [my]_2959-i lips as [I]_2959-i remain silent . “ Well that proves it , [Jameson]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] “ Proves what ? ”_[2959-i] “ That [she]_{356-my mother} ’s [the one]_{356-my mother} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ [You]_2959-i know , ever since [you]_2959-i were [a tiny little boy]_{3369-a tiny little boy} , [you]_2959-i ’ve done this . ”_[2959-i] “ Done what ? ”_{[356-my mother]} What is [she]_{356-my mother} talking about ? “ When [you]_2959-i were very little , maybe three or four years old , [you]_2959-i used to have [this little pale - blue pickup truck]_{3370-this little pale - blue pickup truck} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i listen . “ [You]_2959-i loved it . It fit in the palm of [your]_2959-i hand , and [you]_2959-i always carried it around . It was [your]_2959-i pride and joy . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile softly . “ The thing is , [Tristan]_2430-tristan loved it too . [He]_2430-tristan had [his]_2430-tristan own , but [yours]_2959-i was the special one . And even though [you]_2959-i loved [that truck]_{3370-this little pale - blue pickup truck} with all of [your]_2959-i heart , the moment that [Tristan]_2430-tristan got upset about anything . . . [you]_2959-i would give it to [him]_2430-tristan . [You]_2959-i could n’t stand seeing [him]_2430-tristan upset , and [you]_2959-i felt responsible to make [him]_2430-tristan happy . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ As [you]_2959-i grew up , [I]_2103-her watched [you]_2959-i do this many times , [Jameson]_186-jameson , with many things . To [the outside world]_{1518-the outside world} [you]_2959-i were aloof and cold , but for [the ones [you]_2959-i loved]_{3372-the ones you loved} , [you]_2959-i would do anything to make [them]_{3372-the ones you loved} happy . [You]_2959-i have more heart than sense . ”_[2103-her] [My]_2959-i eyes hold [hers]_2103-her . “ Why do [you]_2959-i think that [Emily]_186-jameson would n’t be happy with [you]_2959-i ? ”_[2103-her] [I]_2959-i stare at [her]_2103-her for a moment as a clusterfuck of emotion runs through [me]_2959-i . “ Because eventually , [I]_2959-i ’m going to let [her]_2103-her down , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [Her]_2103-her face softens . “ [Jameson darling]_186-jameson , how ? By working too hard ? By being too honorable to [your]_2959-i family business ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i close [my]_2959-i eyes . “ [I]_2959-i ’m in love with [a man just like [you]_2959-i]_{3373-a man just like you} , [Jameson]_186-jameson . [You]_2959-i know [him]_186-jameson well , [[your]_2959-i father]_{3288-your father} . [He]_{3288-your father} , like [you]_2959-i , is a workaholic . ”_[2959-i] “ How . . . ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t know how to do both , [Mom]_70-mom . ”_[2959-i] “ Then work it out . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stare at [her]_2103-her . “ [Emily]_186-jameson loves [you]_2959-i , [Jameson]_186-jameson , not [your]_2959-i money . . . or [[your]_2959-i company]_{3375-your company} . [She]_2103-her loves [you]_2959-i . . . just [you]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i drop [my]_2959-i head . “ Stop being so damn selfless , and do what [you]_2959-i want to do . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i do n’t know what that is anymore , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ Oh , nonsense , ”_[2103-her] [she]_2103-her snaps . “ Tell [me]_2103-her something . If [you]_2959-i were on [a deserted island]_{3376-a deserted island} , who would [you]_2959-i want by [your]_2959-i side ? ”_[2103-her] “ [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper without hesitation . “ Being in love is like being on [a deserted island]_{3376-a deserted island} , [Jameson]_186-jameson . [You]_2959-i focus on [them]_{3376-a deserted island} and [them]_{3376-a deserted island} only , and [you]_2959-i make everything else fit around [that person]_{352-that person} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i inhale deeply . “ If [you]_2959-i do n’t want to travel into the future with [her]_2103-her , do n’t . But do n’t [you]_2959-i dare pull away from [your]_2959-i own happiness to protect [her]_2103-her . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i clench [my]_2959-i jaw as [I]_2959-i listen . “ How [one man]_{3378-one man} can be so ruthless in business and so giving to those [he]_{3378-one man} loves , [I]_2104-i will never understand . . . but , the fact that [[your]_2959-i father]_{3288-your father} is [your]_2959-i carbon copy , [I]_2104-i know it ’s possible . ”_[2104-i] [She]_2104-i cups [my]_2959-i face in [her]_2104-i hand . “ The man [I]_2104-i love and [the man that [the world]_{249-the world}]_{3380-the man that the world} knows are [two very different men]_{3382-two very different men} . . . and that ’s just how [I]_2104-i like it . [I]_2104-i like that [I]_2104-i ’m [the only one who gets [his]_{3380-the man that the world} softness]_{3380-the man that the world} . ”_[2104-i] [I]_2959-i smile softly . “ [I]_2959-i am [[your]_2959-i father]_{3288-your father} ’s world , [Jameson]_186-jameson ; [he]_186-jameson made it work around the company . Never once have [I]_2959-i felt neglected or unloved . [I]_2959-i have always come first to [him]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stare at [her]_2104-i as [her]_2104-i words roll around in [my]_2959-i head . “ [The man that [Emily]_186-jameson]_186-jameson loves and the one that [you]_186-jameson think [you]_186-jameson are are [two very different men]_{3382-two very different men} . [You]_186-jameson need to allow [yourself]_186-jameson to be who [you]_186-jameson are with [Emily]_186-jameson and be [the Jameson Miles]_186-jameson that [the world]_{249-the world} knows . It ’s not one or the other like [you]_186-jameson think it is . The fact that [you]_186-jameson have put [Emily]_186-jameson ’s happiness ahead of [your]_186-jameson own cements that [she]_186-jameson is [the one who has been chosen for [you]_186-jameson]_{3386-the one who has been chosen for you} . ”_[2104-i] “ [She]_2105-she wo n’t speak to [me]_2959-i , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [She]_2105-she stands . “ Then make [her]_2105-she listen . ”_[2105-she] [She]_2105-she takes [me]_2959-i into [her]_2105-she arms . “ Go and get [your]_186-jameson love , and grab [her]_2105-she with both hands . . . and never let [her]_2105-she go . ”_[2105-she] [She]_2105-she kisses [me]_2959-i on the cheek and , without another word , leaves [[my]_2959-i apartment]_{766-my apartment} . [[My]_2959-i mother]_{356-my mother} ’s words ring [home]_2289-home , loud and clear . [You]_2109-you need to allow [yourself]_2109-you to be who [you]_2109-you are with [Emily]_186-jameson and be the [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson that [the world]_{249-the world} knows . It ’s not one or the other like [you]_2111-you think it is . It ’s five o’clock in the morning , and [I]_2959-i lie and stare at the ceiling of [[my]_2959-i living room]_{2112-my living room} from [my]_2959-i couch . [I]_2959-i ’m still fully dressed in the clothes [I]_2959-i wore yesterday . [I]_2959-i have n’t slept all night . [[My]_2959-i mother]_{356-my mother} ’s words keep going over and over in [my]_2959-i head . [She]_{356-my mother} thinks that [I]_2959-i can be both [the man that [Emily]_186-jameson wants and the man that [I]_2959-i need to be]_{2113-the man that emily wants and the man that i need to be} . As [I]_2959-i see it , [I]_2959-i have three options . The first is to walk away from [Miles Media]_{14-miles media} so that [I]_2959-i can be [a man]_{2300-a man} worth being with . The second is to let [Emily]_186-jameson leave [my]_2959-i life forever . [My]_2959-i stomach twists as [I]_2959-i imagine living [my]_2959-i life without [her]_186-jameson . The third is to try to be both . . . is it truly possible to live as [two men]_{2115-two men} ? [I]_2959-i stand , and for the first time in a long time , [I]_2959-i have crystal - clear clarity . Fuck this . [I]_2959-i ’m going to try , and if [I]_2959-i ca n’t make it work , [I]_2959-i will leave [Miles Media]_{14-miles media} . [I]_2959-i ’m getting [[my]_2959-i girl]_2959-i back . [She]_2959-i comes first . Chapter 25 [Emily]_186-jameson [I]_2959-i close down [my]_2959-i computer and pack up [my]_2959-i desk and make [my]_2959-i way to [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} . [I]_2959-i ’m one of the last to leave [the office]_{375-the elevator} . It ’s been a long day , but [I]_2959-i achieved a lot . It ’s the weirdest thing — blocking [Jameson]_186-jameson yesterday was the most satisfying thing [I]_2959-i ’ve done since [I]_2959-i murdered [his]_186-jameson roses . In some kind of sick and twisted way , being mean to [him]_186-jameson is releasing some of [my]_2959-i anger . Hurting [him]_186-jameson is like the best kind of therapy . [I]_2959-i must really be messed up at the moment ; either that , or payback is just surprisingly satisfying . [I]_2959-i watched the movie [John Wick]_{233-john wick} last night , and [I]_2959-i smiled the whole way through it . . . that in itself says a lot about [my]_2959-i current headspace . [I]_2959-i take [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} and walk out onto [the street]_{550-the street} . It ’s dark and cold , and [I]_2959-i pull [my]_2959-i heavy coat around [my]_2959-i shoulders for protection . “ [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i hear a voice from behind [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i stop on the spot . . . shit . [Jameson]_186-jameson . . . what ’s [he]_186-jameson doing here ? [I]_2959-i put [my]_2959-i head down and keep walking . “ [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson repeats . [I]_2959-i spin toward [him]_186-jameson . “ What , [Jameson]_186-jameson ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . “ Can [I]_2959-i talk to [you]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] “ No . Go away . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i turn away from [him]_186-jameson and start to storm to [my]_2959-i bus stop . [He]_186-jameson follows [me]_2959-i as [I]_2959-i walk . “ [I]_186-jameson just want five minutes of [your]_2959-i time . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i stay silent . [He]_186-jameson runs to catch up with [me]_2959-i . “ [I]_186-jameson know [I]_186-jameson fucked up . . . bad . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i glare at [him]_186-jameson as [I]_2959-i imagine punching [his]_186-jameson stupid , handsome face . [I]_2959-i get a vision of [his]_186-jameson head snapping back as [I]_2959-i connect the hit . “ Please , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson stammers as [he]_186-jameson runs after [me]_2959-i . “ [I]_186-jameson need to explain why . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [I]_2959-i ’m not interested . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i march forward . [He]_186-jameson follows [me]_2959-i for a while longer as if not sure what to say . “ [I]_186-jameson ’m going to follow [you]_186-jameson until [you]_186-jameson talk to [me]_186-jameson . Can [we]_3387-we get a drink or something ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ No . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Dinner ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Go . Away . [Jameson]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [I]_186-jameson ’m not leaving [you]_186-jameson , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson stammers as [he]_186-jameson runs to keep up with [me]_2959-i . “ [You]_186-jameson already did . Get out of [my]_186-jameson face . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson runs in front of [me]_2959-i and walks backward facing [me]_2959-i . “ [I]_186-jameson mean , [I]_186-jameson ’m not leaving [you]_186-jameson again . . . ever . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Then it ’s going to be a one - sided relationship because [I]_186-jameson want nothing to do with [you]_186-jameson . Ever again . ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson face falls . “ Do n’t say that . ”_{[2774-that guy]} [A man]_{2774-that guy} runs into [him]_{2774-that guy} as [he]_{2774-that guy} walks backward . “ Watch out , ”_{[2774-that guy]} [the man]_{2774-that guy} snaps as [he]_{2774-that guy} brushes past . “ [I]_{2774-that guy} just want ten minutes of [your]_186-jameson time , ”_{[2774-that guy]} [he]_{2774-that guy} stammers . “ No . ”_{[2774-that guy]} [We]_2120-we arrive at [my]_2959-i bus stop , and [I]_2959-i stand in line . [He]_{2774-that guy} stands next to [me]_2959-i . “ [Alan]_246-alan can come and get [us]_2120-we , [you]_246-alan know ? ”_{[2774-that guy]} [He]_{2774-that guy} looks at the long line of [people]_248-people . “ [We]_2120-we do n’t have to catch [the bus]_{2054-the bus} . ”_{[2774-that guy]} [I]_2959-i glare at [him]_{2774-that guy} , unimpressed . [Spoiled brat]_{2122-spoiled brat} . [He]_{2774-that guy} smiles . “ [You]_{2122-spoiled brat} ’re still gorgeous when [you]_{2122-spoiled brat} ’re angry . . . [you]_{2122-spoiled brat} know that ? ”_{[2774-that guy]} [he]_{2774-that guy} says loudly , and [other people in [the bus line]_{2124-the bus line}]_{2123-other people in the bus line} begin to look over . Red steam shoots from [my]_2959-i ears at [him]_{2774-that guy} making a scene . “ [Jameson]_186-jameson , go the fuck [home]_2289-home , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper angrily . “ No . ”_{[2774-that guy]} [He]_{2774-that guy} folds [his]_{2774-that guy} arms in front of [him]_{2774-that guy} like [a petulant teenager]_{2125-a petulant teenager} . “ [I]_{2774-that guy} ’m not leaving without [you]_{2774-that guy} . ”_{[2774-that guy]} [[People]_248-people around [us]_2128-us]_{2127-people around us} are all watching . [I]_2959-i take out [my]_2959-i Kindle and open it . . . anything to block [him]_{2774-that guy} out . “ What are [you]_{2774-that guy} reading ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i remain silent as [I]_2959-i pretend to read . Damn [him]_{2774-that guy} . . . [he]_{2774-that guy} thinks [he]_{2774-that guy} can turn up here and demand to see [me]_2959-i . . . [he]_{2774-that guy} can kiss [my]_2959-i ass . “ [I]_{2774-that guy} ’m reading a good book at the moment , ”_{[2774-that guy]} [he]_{2774-that guy} continues . [I]_2959-i keep reading . “ It ’s called . . . ”_{[2774-that guy]} [He]_{2774-that guy} pauses as [he]_{2774-that guy} thinks for a moment . “ It ’s called ‘ how to get [[your]_{2774-that guy} girl]_{3390-your girl} back after a midlife crisis . ’ ”_{[2774-that guy]} [The girls behind [me]_2959-i snicker]_{2129-the girls behind me snicker} . [I]_2959-i twist [my]_2959-i lips to try and hide [my]_2959-i amusement . Do n’t get fucking cute now , [asshole]_2756-asshole . “ Chapter one is called ‘ bus duty , ’ ”_{[2774-that guy]} [he]_{2774-that guy} continues . [I]_2959-i bite the inside of [my]_2959-i cheek . “ Yes , it says to follow [her]_{3390-your girl} to [the bus]_{2054-the bus} stop and keep talking aimlessly until [she]_{3390-your girl} gets sick of the sound of [your]_3392-your voice and has to talk to [you]_3392-your . . . even if that first word is shut up . . . that ’s something , right ? ”_{[2774-that guy]} [I]_2959-i flick the page of [my]_2959-i Kindle over as [I]_2959-i stop [myself]_2959-i from playing into [his]_{2774-that guy} hands and saying the words shut up . [The girls behind [me]_2959-i snicker]_{2129-the girls behind me snicker} again . [I]_2959-i glare at [my]_2959-i Kindle . [I]_2959-i wo n’t be surprised if the screen breaks under the pressure . “ What does chapter two say ? ”_{[2129-the girls behind me snicker]} [the girl]_{2129-the girls behind me snicker} behind [me]_2959-i asks as [the bus]_{2054-the bus} arrives and pulls to a stop . [I]_2959-i jump on . “ Get on [the bus]_{2054-the bus} , ”_{[2774-that guy]} [I]_2959-i hear [him]_{2774-that guy} say from behind [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i walk on and take a window seat at the back , and [he]_{2774-that guy} comes and sits beside [me]_2959-i . Are [you]_2132-you kidding [me]_2959-i ? “ This is a great seat , ”_{[2774-that guy]} [he]_{2774-that guy} whispers . “ [I]_{2774-that guy} like it . ”_{[2774-that guy]} “ Stop talking to [me]_2959-i , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i growl . “ [I]_2959-i ca n’t . [You]_2132-you see , [I]_2959-i ’ve finally worked it out . And [I]_2959-i need [you]_2132-you to listen to [me]_2959-i so that [we]_3393-we can sort this mess out . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stare out the window . “ [I]_2959-i mean , how can [we]_3393-we fix this if [you]_2132-you wo n’t speak to [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] “ [We]_3393-we wo n’t . That ’s the point , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i mutter dryly . “ Do n’t say that , [FB]_185-fb . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i glare at [him]_{2774-that guy} as a glow of red covers the sky . . . do n’t fight ; do n’t give [him]_{2774-that guy} the satisfaction . [He]_{2774-that guy} smiles sweetly , totally oblivious to [my]_2959-i rage . “ It ’s so good to see [you]_{2774-that guy} . ”_{[2774-that guy]} [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes and look back out the window . . . do n’t talk to [him]_{2774-that guy} . . . not one word . . . do n’t give in to [him]_{2774-that guy} . “ God . . . [I]_{2774-that guy} ’ve missed [you]_{2774-that guy} , [Em]_{2774-that guy} , ”_{[2774-that guy]} [he]_{2774-that guy} whispers . Something inside of [me]_2959-i breaks . “ [You]_{2774-that guy} do n’t get to say that , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . “ But it ’s true . ”_[2959-i] “ Shut up , [Jameson]_186-jameson . The time for talking is over . ”_{[2774-that guy]} [The bus]_{2054-the bus} pulls up to [my]_2959-i stop , and [I]_2959-i get up and brush past [him]_{2774-that guy} . [He]_{2774-that guy} runs after [me]_2959-i as [I]_2959-i storm up [the pavement]_{2134-the pavement} . “ [I]_{2774-that guy} ’m not leaving until [you]_{2774-that guy} talk to [me]_{2774-that guy} . ”_{[2774-that guy]} [I]_2959-i keep walking . “ [I]_2959-i ’ll wait out here all night . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i keep walking . “ Em , come on , ”_{[2774-that guy]} [he]_{2774-that guy} sighs . [I]_2959-i keep walking . “ How can [you]_{2774-that guy} be so cold ? ”_{[2774-that guy]} [he]_{2774-that guy} demands . [I]_2959-i turn like the devil [himself]_{2774-that guy} . “ Do n’t [you]_{2774-that guy} dare call [me]_2959-i cold , [you]_{2774-that guy} hypocrite . [You]_{2774-that guy} ’re the only fucking cold one here . ”_[2959-i] “ There [she]_{2774-that guy} is . ”_{[2774-that guy]} [He]_{2774-that guy} smiles as if proud of [himself]_{2774-that guy} for getting [me]_2959-i to say something . [My]_2959-i face falls at [my]_2959-i own weakness . “ [Jameson]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ [Babe]_190-babe . ”_{[2774-that guy]} [He]_{2774-that guy} grabs [my]_2959-i two hands in [his]_{2774-that guy} . “ Please talk to [me]_{2774-that guy} . [I]_{2774-that guy} miss [you]_{2774-that guy} , and [I]_{2774-that guy} know [you]_{2774-that guy} miss [me]_{2774-that guy} too . [I]_{2774-that guy} need to make this right between [us]_3394-us ; [we]_3394-us can make it through this . ”_{[2774-that guy]} Tears well in [my]_2959-i eyes at [his]_{2774-that guy} touch , and [I]_2959-i ’m angry with [myself]_2959-i for letting [him]_{2774-that guy} get this close . “ [I]_2959-i ca n’t . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i brush past [him]_{2774-that guy} . “ Please , [Em]_{2774-that guy} , ”_{[2774-that guy]} [he]_{2774-that guy} calls from behind [me]_2959-i . “ [I]_2959-i ’ll beg . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i keep walking . “ Do [you]_2959-i want [me]_2959-i to get on [my]_2959-i knees right here ? Because [I]_2959-i will . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i keep walking , and [he]_{2774-that guy} runs up behind [me]_2959-i . “ Tell [me]_{2774-that guy} how to make this right ? Tell [me]_{2774-that guy} what to do , and [I]_{2774-that guy} ’ll do it . ”_{[2774-that guy]} [I]_2959-i turn to [him]_{2774-that guy} . “ Move on . . . [I]_{2774-that guy} have . ”_{[2774-that guy]} [His]_{2774-that guy} face falls . “ Okay . . . [I]_{2774-that guy} deserved that . ”_{[2774-that guy]} “ [I]_2959-i did n’t . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i push through tears as [I]_2959-i brush past [him]_{2774-that guy} and keep walking . “ [I]_{2774-that guy} know , [Em]_186-jameson , ”_{[2774-that guy]} [he]_{2774-that guy} calls . “ [I]_2959-i ’m so sorry . [That guy]_{2774-that guy} . . . [that guy]_{2774-that guy} was crazy to let [you]_3395-you go . [I]_2959-i was out of [my]_2959-i fucking head . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i get to [[my]_2959-i building]_{703-my building} , and [he]_{2774-that guy} comes up behind [me]_2959-i as [I]_2959-i open the door with [my]_2959-i key . [He]_{2774-that guy} slides [his]_{2774-that guy} arm around [my]_2959-i waist from behind and pulls [me]_2959-i close . “ Please , ”_{[2774-that guy]} [he]_{2774-that guy} murmurs into [my]_2959-i hair . “ [I]_{2774-that guy} love [you]_{2774-that guy} . ”_{[2774-that guy]} [I]_2959-i close [my]_2959-i eyes in pain at the feel of [his]_{2774-that guy} touch . . . [I]_2959-i miss [him]_{2774-that guy} . [I]_2959-i pull out of [his]_{2774-that guy} grip . “ Do n’t touch [me]_2959-i , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i spit . “ What makes [you]_{2774-that guy} think [you]_{2774-that guy} can come back here and say that ? ”_{[2774-that guy]} [His]_{2774-that guy} eyes search [mine]_2959-i . “ Because [you]_{2774-that guy} love [me]_{2774-that guy} . . . and two wrongs do n’t make a right . If [you]_{2774-that guy} do n’t let [me]_{2774-that guy} make this right between [us]_3396-we out of stubbornness , which is a real possibility . . . ”_{[2774-that guy]} [He]_{2774-that guy} pauses as [he]_{2774-that guy} tries to get the wording right . “ [We]_3396-we will both regret it forever ; [you]_{2774-that guy} know [we]_3396-we will . ”_{[2774-that guy]} [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_{2774-that guy} for a moment as [his]_{2774-that guy} words roll around in [my]_2959-i head . [I]_2959-i turn and walk into [[my]_2959-i building]_{703-my building} and close the door behind [me]_2959-i . [He]_{2774-that guy} watches [me]_2959-i through the glass . [I]_2959-i hit the elevator button , and the doors open straightaway . [I]_2959-i dive in and hit the buttons to close the doors as [my]_2959-i tears well in [my]_2959-i eyes . [Bastard]_84-bastard . [I]_2959-i walk out of [[my]_2959-i building]_{703-my building} right at eight o’clock in the morning . [I]_2959-i have n’t slept much , and [I]_2959-i keep seeing [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s sad face when [I]_2959-i left [him]_186-jameson last night . [I]_2959-i hate that [I]_2959-i care about [him]_186-jameson . [His]_186-jameson words kept playing over and over in [my]_2959-i head all night . [I]_2959-i hate that [he]_186-jameson said them . [I]_2959-i hate that [they]_2137-they made sense . “ Because [you]_3397-you love [me]_0-aaron . . . and two wrongs do n’t make a right . If [you]_3397-you do n’t let [me]_0-aaron make this right between [us]_3398-we out of stubbornness , which is a real possibility . . . [we]_3398-we will both regret it forever ; [you]_3397-you know [we]_3398-we will . ”_[0-aaron] [God]_0-aaron , what a mess . “ Good morning , ”_[0-aaron] [I]_2959-i hear a chirpy voice from behind [me]_2959-i . [Jameson]_186-jameson is standing beside [my]_2959-i door in [his]_186-jameson navy suit , looking all dapper and not at all discouraged like [he]_186-jameson should be . “ What are [you]_3397-you doing here ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Waiting for [you]_3397-you . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson smiles as [he]_186-jameson takes [my]_2959-i gym bag from [me]_2959-i and puts it over [his]_186-jameson shoulder . “ Are [we]_3398-we catching [the bus]_{2054-the bus} today ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i look at [him]_186-jameson deadpan . “ [I]_2959-i ’m catching [the bus]_{2054-the bus} . What [you]_3397-you ’re doing . . . [I]_2959-i have no idea . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_186-jameson ’m following [you]_3397-you around until [you]_3397-you agree to have dinner with [me]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ It ’s not happening , [Jameson]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Okay , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson says as [he]_186-jameson begins to walk to [the bus]_{2054-the bus} stop . “ [I]_186-jameson ’ll just be following [you]_3397-you around for forever , then . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_186-jameson , and [he]_186-jameson gives [me]_2959-i a slow , sexy smile . “ [You]_3397-you look beautiful today . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Stop it . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ No . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i walk to [the bus]_{2054-the bus} stop with [him]_186-jameson beside [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i ’m staying silent , and [he]_186-jameson is jabbering . “ Did [you]_3397-you run this morning ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson asks . “ [I]_2959-i did . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_186-jameson . “ [I]_186-jameson ’m actually quite fit at the moment — all this heartache has [me]_186-jameson running at record speed , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson continues . That makes [two of [us]_{3192-two of us}]_{3192-two of us} . . . [I]_2959-i keep [my]_2959-i mouth tightly closed . [I]_2959-i do n’t want [him]_186-jameson to know that [I]_2959-i ’ve been angry running too . [We]_{3192-two of us} catch [the bus]_{2054-the bus} . [I]_2959-i ’m silent , and [he]_186-jameson ’s carrying on like [we]_{3192-two of us} are [long - lost best friends]_{2141-long - lost best friends} . “ Do [you]_186-jameson want to go camping this weekend ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson asks as [he]_186-jameson opens [his]_186-jameson paper . “ No . [I]_2959-i ’m going to [[my]_2959-i parents]_{1038-my parents} this weekend , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reply flatly . “ Oh . ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson face falls . “ Well , that ’s going to be uncomfortable . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ What is ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ When [I]_186-jameson follow [you]_186-jameson to [[your]_186-jameson parents]_{1038-my parents} . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [You]_186-jameson are not coming to [[my]_2959-i parents]_{1038-my parents} , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i scoff . “ Watch [me]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson eyes dance with mischief . “ [You]_186-jameson wo n’t talk to [me]_186-jameson ; [I]_186-jameson ’m going to keep following [you]_186-jameson until [you]_186-jameson do . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [I]_186-jameson do n’t want [you]_186-jameson to follow [me]_186-jameson . In fact , [I]_186-jameson do n’t want anything to do with [you]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ No need to be snarky , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson says casually as [he]_186-jameson turns the page of [his]_186-jameson paper . “ It ’s unbecoming . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i glare at [him]_186-jameson . “ [You]_186-jameson know what ’s unbecoming ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper angrily . “ Jerks who break [girls]_2675-girls ’ hearts and think that [they]_2675-girls can snap [their]_2675-girls fingers and get [her]_2675-girls back at the drop of a hat . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson smirks down at [me]_2959-i . “ Yes , [I]_186-jameson have to agree . Although if [they]_2675-girls are meant to be together , and [he]_186-jameson was under the impression that [he]_186-jameson was doing the right thing by [her]_2675-girls at the time . . . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Oh , please , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i huff . “ Can [you]_2959-i hear [yourself]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] “ Have dinner with [me]_186-jameson tonight . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ No . ”_{[186-jameson]} [The bus]_{2054-the bus} pulls up at [my]_2959-i stop , and [he]_186-jameson stands and grabs [my]_2959-i gym bag and puts it back over [his]_186-jameson shoulder . [I]_2959-i watch [him]_186-jameson walk up [the aisle of [the bus]_{2054-the bus}]_{2143-the aisle of the bus} to get off , and [I]_2959-i smile to [myself]_2959-i . Has [he]_186-jameson ever caught [a bus]_{2054-the bus} before ? [Idiot]_226-idiot . [We]_2144-we walk up [the road]_{533-the road} in silence , and [I]_2959-i turn and catch sight of [the limo]_{678-the limo} parked across [the street]_{550-the street} . [Alan]_246-alan is leaning up against it , and [he]_246-alan smiles and waves over at [me]_2959-i . “ [Alan]_246-alan knows [you]_246-alan ’re here ? ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i whisper in mortification . “ [Everyone]_{2304-everyone} knows [I]_246-alan ’m here , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan says casually as [he]_246-alan hands [my]_2959-i bag over . “ It ’s no secret that [I]_246-alan want [you]_246-alan back . [I]_246-alan have stated [my]_246-alan intentions loud and clear . ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_246-alan . “ See [you]_246-alan this afternoon . ”_[2959-i] “ [Jameson]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sigh . “ [I]_246-alan ’m not giving up on [us]_3403-us , [Em]_3404-em . . . ever . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan smiles softly . “ [We]_3403-us were made for each other . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i scratch [my]_2959-i head in frustration . “ Have a nice day . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan watches [me]_2959-i with [his]_246-alan hands in [his]_246-alan pockets , keeping a safe distance . “ Bye . ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i turn and walk into [[my]_2959-i building]_{703-my building} . [My]_2959-i phone beeps a text . It ’s from an unknown number . Have a good day . This is [my]_2959-i burner phone in case of an emergency . [Jameson]_186-jameson . [He]_186-jameson ’s got another phone , one that [I]_2959-i have n’t blocked . [I]_2959-i get into [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} and find [myself]_2959-i smirking at the ground . Stop it . . . [he]_186-jameson ’s [an asshole]_186-jameson . . . never forget that . It ’s three o’clock , and [I]_2959-i ’m finishing a report for publication this week . [I]_2959-i love this job . [I]_2959-i mean , not as much as [I]_2959-i loved [Miles Media]_{68-miles media} , but [that ship]_{2150-that ship} has sailed — may as well make the most of it . [The staff]_{253-the staff} are all really friendly and nice and have welcomed [me]_2959-i with open arms . “ Delivery for [Emily Foster]_186-jameson , ”_{[253-the staff]} [I]_2959-i hear . [I]_2959-i look up and see [a man walking through the floor]_{2152-a man walking through the floor} with a white box . What the hell ? “ Oh , [she]_186-jameson ’s in [that office]_{3405-that office} over there , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i hear [someone]_2326-someone say . [He]_2326-someone knocks on [my]_2959-i door . “ Are [you]_186-jameson [Emily Foster]_186-jameson ? ”_{[2326-someone]} “ Yes . ”_{[2326-someone]} “ [I]_2326-someone have a delivery for [you]_186-jameson . ”_{[2326-someone]} [He]_2326-someone hands over the white box . [I]_2959-i take it from [him]_2326-someone . “ Thank [you]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] “ Um . ”_{[2326-someone]} [He]_2326-someone smirks , shuffling awkwardly in place . “ It ’s from [the Kung Fu Panda]_{234-the kung fu panda} . ”_{[2326-someone]} “ What ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i was told to tell [you]_186-jameson that [the Kung Fu Panda]_{234-the kung fu panda} sent it . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i try to hide [my]_2959-i smile and fail miserably . “ Thank [you]_186-jameson . ”_{[2326-someone]} [He]_2326-someone leaves , and [I]_2959-i open the box to find a huge caramel cheesecake and a small white card . Cheesecake for [my]_2959-i cheesecake . xoxoxo [I]_2959-i close the box and smirk . [He]_2326-someone ’s [an idiot]_{2154-an idiot} , and [I]_2959-i ’m not a cheesecake . . . if [he]_2326-someone thinks [he]_2326-someone can weasel [his]_2326-someone way back into [my]_2959-i good book by being cute , [he]_2326-someone has another thing coming . [Kung Fu Panda]_{234-the kung fu panda} . . . where the hell does [he]_2326-someone get this shit ? [A girl]_{387-a girl} from [the office]_{385-new york} next door pops [her]_{387-a girl} head around [the corner]_{672-the corner} . “ What ’s that ? ”_{[387-a girl]} “ [Cheesecake]_{235-cheesecake} , want some ? ”_{[387-a girl]} “ Hell yeah , [I]_{387-a girl} ’ll get the plates . ”_{[387-a girl]} [She]_{387-a girl} disappears to [the kitchen]_{683-the kitchen} . [I]_2959-i stare at [my]_2959-i phone for a moment . Should [I]_2959-i text [him]_2326-someone and say thank [you]_2326-someone ? No , this is why [he]_2326-someone did it — to get a reaction . [He]_2326-someone knows [I]_2959-i ’ve got good manners and would never receive a gift without thanking [him]_2326-someone . [He]_2326-someone ’ll be waiting for [my]_2959-i call . Well , too bad for [the stupid Kung Fu Panda]_{234-the kung fu panda} . More fool [him]_2326-someone . [He]_2326-someone created this beast ; [he]_2326-someone can live with [my]_2959-i rudeness . [He]_2326-someone ’s in the freezer . At six o’clock in the evening , [I]_2959-i make [my]_2959-i way [downstairs]_{2454-downstairs} . [I]_2959-i may have fixed [my]_2959-i hair and applied some lipstick . . . not that [I]_2959-i ’ll ever admit to it . [I]_2959-i walk out of [the building]_{361-the building} and out onto [the street]_{550-the street} to see [Jameson]_186-jameson standing and leaning up against the wall . [He]_186-jameson ’s wearing [his]_186-jameson gray suit , the one that [I]_2959-i love . [His]_186-jameson dark hair hangs over [his]_186-jameson forehead , and [his]_186-jameson chiseled jaw does things to [my]_2959-i insides . [He]_186-jameson smiles broadly and pushes off the wall when [he]_186-jameson sees [me]_2959-i coming . How long has [he]_186-jameson been standing there ? “ Good afternoon , [Ms. Foster]_{126-ms. foster} . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [I]_2959-i did n’t know that [you]_{126-ms. foster} knew kung fu , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say as [I]_2959-i walk past [him]_186-jameson . “ Oh , [I]_186-jameson do , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson says as [he]_186-jameson falls into step behind [me]_2959-i . “ There are a lot of things about [me]_186-jameson that [you]_{126-ms. foster} do n’t know . Did [I]_186-jameson tell [you]_{126-ms. foster} that [I]_186-jameson ’m becoming [an extreme sportist]_{3406-an extreme sportist} ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i keep silent as [I]_2959-i walk . It ’s hard to keep a straight face when [he]_186-jameson ’s in this mood . “ Yes , [I]_2959-i thought [I]_2959-i might start hiking up [mountains]_{3407-mountains} and camping there and stuff . Making fire with [my]_2959-i bare hands and whatnot . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smirk as [I]_2959-i walk in front of [him]_186-jameson , unable to help it . “ Really ? ”_[2959-i] “ Uh - huh . [You]_{126-ms. foster} see , [I]_2959-i ’m becoming one with nature . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_{126-ms. foster} . [One with nature]_{3408-one with nature} . [I]_2959-i ’d like to see that , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i mutter dryly . “ Okay , [we]_3409-we can hike up [a mountain]_{3410-a mountain} this weekend . How ’s [Mount Kosciuszko]_{236-mount kosciuszko} ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i ’m busy , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i say as [I]_2959-i keep walking . “ Oh , that ’s right ; [we]_3409-we are going to [[your]_{126-ms. foster} parents]_{2614-your parents} this weekend . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_{126-ms. foster} ’re not coming , [Jameson]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] “ [[Your]_{126-ms. foster} mother]_{356-my mother} said [I]_2959-i could when [I]_2959-i spoke to [her]_{356-my mother} earlier . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i spin on the spot toward [him]_2959-i . “ [You]_{126-ms. foster} called [[my]_2959-i mother]_{356-my mother} ? ”_[2959-i] “ No , but [I]_2959-i will if [you]_{126-ms. foster} do n’t have dinner with [me]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i smiles hopefully . [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_2959-i . “ [Jameson]_186-jameson , if [you]_{126-ms. foster} think the [Kung Fu Panda]_{234-the kung fu panda} sending [me]_2959-i a cake and calling [me]_2959-i a cheesecake can reverse the damage [you]_{126-ms. foster} have done , [you]_{126-ms. foster} are seriously deluded . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i takes [my]_2959-i two hands in [his]_2959-i . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t , [Em]_186-jameson , but please . . . just let [me]_2959-i say what [I]_2959-i need to say . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_2959-i . “ And then if [you]_{126-ms. foster} do n’t want to see [me]_2959-i again , [I]_2959-i ’ll stop following [you]_{126-ms. foster} . ”_[2959-i] [His]_2959-i eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ [We]_3413-we need to talk about this ; [you]_{126-ms. foster} know [we]_3413-we do . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes . “ Please ? ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i bats [his]_2959-i eyelashes to try and be cute ; it ’s annoying that [he]_2959-i is . “ Fine . [You]_{126-ms. foster} have ten minutes . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sigh . “ Where do [you]_{126-ms. foster} want to go ? ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i smiles . “ Wherever is easiest . ”_[2959-i] “ Okay . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i looks around . “ How about [that Italian restaurant across [the street]_{550-the street}]_{3414-that italian restaurant across the street} ? ”_[2959-i] “ Fine . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i tries to take [my]_2959-i hand , and [I]_2959-i snatch it away . “ [You]_{126-ms. foster} have got to be kidding , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . “ [Jesus]_107-jesus , calm down , ”_[2959-i] [he]_2959-i mutters . [I]_2959-i follow [him]_2959-i across [the street]_{550-the street} and into [the restaurant]_{2612-the restaurant} , and [we]_2164-we take a seat at the back of [the restaurant]_{2612-the restaurant} . It ’s small and darkened with candles on the tables . Red tablecloths decorate the tables . It ’s nothing like the usual upmarket Italian that [he]_2959-i takes [me]_2959-i to , but it will have to do . “ Can [I]_{717-the waiter} get [you]_{126-ms. foster} some drinks ? ”_{[717-the waiter]} [the waiter]_{717-the waiter} asks . [Jameson]_186-jameson smirks and gestures to [me]_2959-i . “ [I]_186-jameson ’ll have what [she]_3415-she ’s having . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_2959-i for a moment and open [my]_2959-i menu . “ All right , [we]_2164-we ’ll have a bottle of [the Henschke Hill of Grace]_{3416-the henschke hill of grace} , please . ”_[2959-i] “ Yes , [ma’am]_{3416-the henschke hill of grace} . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [The waiter]_{717-the waiter} disappears out the back to [the bar]_{459-the bar} . [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s eyes come to [me]_2959-i , and [he]_186-jameson smiles softly and takes [my]_2959-i hands over the table . “ Do [you]_{3416-the henschke hill of grace} know how much [I]_186-jameson ’ve missed [you]_{3416-the henschke hill of grace} ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson whispers . [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_186-jameson in some kind of strange detached state . “ Did [you]_{3416-the henschke hill of grace} miss [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] Instantly [I]_2959-i ’m overwhelmed with emotion . [I]_2959-i stay silent as [I]_2959-i battle the lump in [my]_2959-i throat . [I]_2959-i hate that [he]_186-jameson makes [me]_2959-i feel so weak and vulnerable . [I]_2959-i pull [my]_2959-i hands out of [his]_186-jameson grip . [I]_2959-i need to create some distance between [us]_2167-us . “ Em . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson frowns . “ [I]_186-jameson . . . ”_{[186-jameson]} It ’s clear that [he]_186-jameson has no idea what to say . “ When [I]_186-jameson saw that image of [you]_186-jameson kissing [Jake]_108-jay — ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [Jameson]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer . [He]_186-jameson holds [his]_186-jameson hand up to signify silence , and [I]_2959-i close [my]_2959-i mouth . “ Something snapped inside of [me]_186-jameson . [I]_186-jameson was so thrown that it upset [me]_186-jameson so deeply that [I]_186-jameson . . . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson frowns as [he]_186-jameson remembers it . “ [I]_2168-i was furious — firstly with [you]_186-jameson , but then with [myself]_2168-i . ”_[2168-i] [Our]_2168-i eyes are locked . “ [I]_2959-i was going through so much shit at work , and [the very last person on [earth]_872-earth]_{3417-the very last person on earth} that [I]_2959-i thought would lie to [me]_2959-i . . . was [you]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i drop [my]_2959-i head in shame . “ And then when [I]_2959-i calmed down after a few days and realized that [you]_186-jameson had been set up , the future mapped itself out to [me]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ There is always going to be [someone like [Ferrara]_2430-tristan who is prepared to step on [you]_186-jameson to hurt [me]_2959-i]_{3419-someone like ferrara who is prepared to step on you to hurt me} . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i heart drops . “ And [I]_2959-i do n’t want that for [you]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] “ [Jay]_108-jay , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper sadly . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t want [you]_186-jameson to be married to [a workaholic who has to travel all the time and is stressed out of [his]_{3420-a workaholic who has to travel all the time and is stressed out of his head} head]_{3420-a workaholic who has to travel all the time and is stressed out of his head} . [I]_2959-i do n’t want [you]_186-jameson to have to remind [[your]_186-jameson husband]_{3421-your husband} not to drink too much or stop being rude to [people]_248-people because [he]_{3421-your husband} ’s too busy to care . [I]_2959-i do n’t want [you]_186-jameson to have to remind [[your]_186-jameson husband]_{3421-your husband} that [he]_{3421-your husband} ’s neglecting [you]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] “ [Your]_186-jameson bottle of wine . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [The waiter]_{717-the waiter} appears out of nowhere . [He]_{717-the waiter} opens it and pours [us]_2170-us both a glass . “ Thank [you]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reply . [My]_2959-i eyes go back to meet [Jameson]_186-jameson ’s . [The waiter]_{717-the waiter} leaves [us]_2170-us alone . “ [I]_{717-the waiter} do n’t want [you]_186-jameson to come second to [Miles Media]_{14-miles media} . [I]_{717-the waiter} do n’t want [you]_186-jameson to ever come second to anything . ”_{[717-the waiter]} “ But — ”_{[717-the waiter]} “ Let [me]_{717-the waiter} finish , please , ”_{[717-the waiter]} [he]_{717-the waiter} demands . [I]_2959-i sit back in [my]_2959-i chair , annoyed that [he]_{717-the waiter} wants to speak first . “ The thing is , if [you]_186-jameson ’re with [me]_2959-i — married to [me]_2959-i — [your]_186-jameson life is going to be all those things . ”_[2959-i] The lump in [my]_2959-i throat gets big . “ [I]_{717-the waiter} love [you]_186-jameson too much to let [you]_186-jameson live that life , [Em]_186-jameson . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [He]_{717-the waiter} ’s ending it again . [My]_2959-i eyes fill with tears . [He]_{717-the waiter} takes [my]_2959-i hand over the table and lifts it to [his]_{717-the waiter} mouth and gently kisses it . “ Do n’t cry . [I]_{717-the waiter} hate that [you]_186-jameson ’ve cried over [me]_{717-the waiter} . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [I]_2959-i blink to try and get rid of these stupid tears . “ [I]_2959-i made a decision to protect [you]_186-jameson from that life . To push [you]_186-jameson away . Because [I]_2959-i knew that one day , [you]_186-jameson would eventually be unhappy . . . and [I]_2959-i just ca n’t live with that . ”_[2959-i] “ It was n’t [your]_186-jameson decision to make , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper angrily . [He]_{717-the waiter} frowns . “ [My]_{717-the waiter} job is to look after [you]_186-jameson and make the hard calls , ones that [you]_186-jameson ca n’t make for [yourself]_186-jameson . ”_{[717-the waiter]} “ [Jameson]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_{717-the waiter} through tears . “ But something happened while [I]_{717-the waiter} was away from [you]_186-jameson . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [He]_{717-the waiter} leans in and cups [my]_2959-i face in [his]_{717-the waiter} hand . “ [I]_{717-the waiter} realized that [I]_{717-the waiter} did n’t want any of those things either . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [My]_2959-i eyes search [his]_{717-the waiter} . “ [I]_{717-the waiter} ca n’t live without [you]_186-jameson , [Em]_186-jameson . [I]_{717-the waiter} ’ve been so fucking miserable that it ’s been unbearable . ”_{[717-the waiter]} [He]_{717-the waiter} leans in and kisses [me]_2959-i softly ; [his]_{717-the waiter} eyes search [mine]_2959-i as [he]_{717-the waiter} dusts [his]_{717-the waiter} thumb over [my]_2959-i bottom lip . “ If [you]_186-jameson do n’t want [me]_2959-i as [I]_2959-i am now , [I]_2959-i ’ll resign from [Miles Media]_{68-miles media} immediately , and [we]_3423-we can move to bumfuck nowhere and , [I]_2959-i do n’t know , live in [a fucking tent somewhere]_{3424-a fucking tent somewhere} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smirk . “ [You]_186-jameson idiot , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [He]_{717-the waiter} smiles as [he]_{717-the waiter} holds [my]_2959-i face in [his]_{717-the waiter} hand . “ [I]_{717-the waiter} love [you]_186-jameson how [you]_186-jameson are . [I]_{717-the waiter} do n’t want [you]_186-jameson to change anything . ”_{[717-the waiter]} “ [You]_186-jameson do ? ”_{[717-the waiter]} “ But [I]_2959-i do n’t . . . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pause as [I]_2959-i try to articulate [my]_2959-i feelings . “ How can [I]_2959-i move on from how [you]_186-jameson ’ve treated [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_{717-the waiter} do n’t know . ”_{[717-the waiter]} “ [I]_{717-the waiter} ca n’t just pretend that this has n’t happened , [Jameson]_186-jameson . [You]_186-jameson ’ve hurt [me]_{717-the waiter} too deeply . ”_{[717-the waiter]} “ [I]_{2154-an idiot} know ; [I]_{2154-an idiot} do n’t want [you]_186-jameson to , ”_{[2154-an idiot]} [he]_{2154-an idiot} stammers . “ But ca n’t [we]_3425-we just . . . ”_{[2154-an idiot]} [He]_{2154-an idiot} shrugs . “ Start dating again ? Take it slow . ”_{[2154-an idiot]} [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_{2154-an idiot} as confusion fills [me]_2959-i . “ [I]_2959-i know it ’s going to take time to get back to where [we]_3425-we were , but [we]_3425-we have the rest of [our]_3425-we lives . [We]_3425-we can date and get to know each other properly this time . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sit back as [I]_2959-i consider [his]_{2154-an idiot} proposal , and [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i wine . “ [You]_{2154-an idiot} know , [I]_{2154-an idiot} always imagined that [I]_{2154-an idiot} would find [[my]_{2154-an idiot} dream guy]_{3426-my dream guy} and fall in love , and then it would come to this big cheesy climax . ”_{[2154-an idiot]} [He]_{2154-an idiot} scrunches up [his]_{2154-an idiot} nose . “ Cheesy climax ? That just sounds wrong . ”_{[2154-an idiot]} [I]_2959-i giggle as [I]_2959-i imagine what [he]_{2154-an idiot} must be thinking about . “ No , [I]_2959-i meant proposal . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_{2154-an idiot} want a cheesy proposal ? ”_{[2154-an idiot]} [He]_{2154-an idiot} frowns . “ Would n’t [you]_{2154-an idiot} want a romantic proposal ? ”_{[2154-an idiot]} “ Not really . [My]_2959-i point is , this is n’t how [I]_2959-i imagined things would go . ”_[2959-i] “ [Me]_{2154-an idiot} neither . ”_{[2154-an idiot]} [He]_{2154-an idiot} takes [my]_2959-i hands in [his]_{2154-an idiot} . “ Far from it . [I]_{2154-an idiot} ’m officially [an idiot]_{2154-an idiot} . Give [me]_{2154-an idiot} another chance , [Em]_{2154-an idiot} . [I]_{2154-an idiot} wo n’t fuck it up , [I]_{2154-an idiot} promise . ”_{[2154-an idiot]} [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_{2154-an idiot} . “ [I]_{2154-an idiot} love [you]_{2154-an idiot} ; [you]_{2154-an idiot} love [me]_{2154-an idiot} . ”_{[2154-an idiot]} [He]_{2154-an idiot} shrugs . “ [We]_3427-we can work through this , and then hopefully in time , [you]_{2154-an idiot} can forget it ever happened , and [you]_{2154-an idiot} can live happily ever after with [an outdoorsy Kung Fu Panda]_{2154-an idiot} . ”_{[2154-an idiot]} [He]_{2154-an idiot} smiles hopefully . “ [You]_{2154-an idiot} ’re [an idiot]_{2154-an idiot} , [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} . ”_{[2154-an idiot]} “ Who ’s hopelessly in love with [you]_{2154-an idiot} . ”_{[2154-an idiot]} [He]_{2154-an idiot} leans over and kisses [me]_2959-i softly , and [I]_2959-i feel [my]_2959-i resistance fade . “ [I]_{2154-an idiot} love [you]_{2154-an idiot} , cheesecake , ”_{[2154-an idiot]} [he]_{2154-an idiot} whispers . “ Do n’t call [me]_{2154-an idiot} fucking cheesecake . ”_{[2154-an idiot]} [He]_{2154-an idiot} chuckles against [my]_2959-i lips . “ Too far ? ”_{[2154-an idiot]} “ Way too far . ”_[2172-we] Chapter 26 [We]_2172-we walk down [the street]_{550-the street} toward [[my]_2959-i apartment]_{766-my apartment} , hand in hand . [Jameson]_186-jameson is being overattentive and talking nonstop , and [I]_2959-i am quiet . [I]_2959-i ’m annoyed that with just one dinner meeting , [I]_2959-i find [myself]_2959-i [here]_{385-new york} with [him]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i ’m officially a pushover . Weak as water . [His]_{2154-an idiot} phone beeps with a text , and [he]_{2154-an idiot} shuffles around in [his]_{2154-an idiot} pocket to retrieve it and smiles . “ [Tristan]_2430-tristan . ”_{[2154-an idiot]} [He]_{2154-an idiot} reads the text out loud “ How did it go ? ”_{[2154-an idiot]} [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes . “ Text back , ‘ Not out of [the woods]_{3429-the woods} yet . Still may be found dead in a ditch tomorrow . ’ ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson smirks . “ No , [I]_{2154-an idiot} ’m not writing that . If it actually happens , [I]_{2154-an idiot} do n’t want [you]_3430-you to go to [prison]_3210-prison . ”_{[2154-an idiot]} [He]_{2154-an idiot} turns to face [me]_2959-i and tucks a piece of [my]_2959-i hair behind [my]_2959-i ear . “ [You]_3430-you would n’t kill [me]_{2154-an idiot} . ”_{[2154-an idiot]} [He]_{2154-an idiot} leans in and kisses [me]_2959-i softly . [My]_2959-i eyes hold [his]_{2154-an idiot} . “ Would n’t [I]_{2154-an idiot} ? ”_{[2154-an idiot]} [He]_{2154-an idiot} smiles and then takes [my]_2959-i hand as [we]_2176-we walk toward the door . [I]_2959-i stop on the spot . “ Good night , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i announce . “ What ? ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_3430-you ’re not coming in . ”_[2959-i] “ Why not ? ”_[2959-i] “ [Jameson]_186-jameson , [I]_2959-i am still eighty percent pissed off with [you]_3430-you . ”_[2959-i] “ Yes . [I]_{2154-an idiot} know . Let [me]_{2154-an idiot} make it up to [you]_3430-you . ”_{[2154-an idiot]} [He]_{2154-an idiot} smiles darkly . [I]_2959-i pull out of [his]_{2154-an idiot} arms and step back from [him]_{2154-an idiot} . “ There is nothing sexual that [you]_3430-you could do that would make up for how [you]_3430-you have treated [me]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] [His]_{2154-an idiot} face falls . “ When [I]_{2154-an idiot} agreed to try again , it was just that . . . to try again . [I]_{2154-an idiot} ’m not promising anything , and [I]_{2154-an idiot} do n’t know how this is going to turn out . [I]_{2154-an idiot} honestly do n’t know if [we]_3432-we can get back what [we]_3432-we had . The morning [you]_3430-you left [me]_{2154-an idiot} after the second stopover , [you]_3430-you broke something between [us]_3432-we . [I]_{2154-an idiot} have never been so upset in all of [my]_{2154-an idiot} life . It was devastating for [me]_{2154-an idiot} . Having sex with [you]_3430-you now is the very last thing that [I]_{2154-an idiot} want to do . ”_{[2154-an idiot]} “ Em , ”_{[2154-an idiot]} [he]_{2154-an idiot} whispers . “ [I]_{2154-an idiot} could n’t talk to [you]_3430-you because it killed [me]_{2154-an idiot} to push [you]_3430-you away . [I]_{2154-an idiot} was battling [myself]_{2154-an idiot} over it . ”_{[2154-an idiot]} “ Good night , [Jameson]_186-jameson . ”_{[2154-an idiot]} [He]_{2154-an idiot} looks around in a fluster . “ Well , when will [I]_2959-i see [you]_3430-you again ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug . “ It ’s Thursday , and [I]_2959-i ’m away for the weekend , so next week , [I]_2959-i guess . ”_[2959-i] “ Next week ? ”_{[2154-an idiot]} [he]_{2154-an idiot} huffs . “ That ’s like four days away . ”_{[2154-an idiot]} “ Is it ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reply flatly as [I]_2959-i begin to dig in [my]_2959-i bag for [my]_2959-i keys . [I]_2959-i really do need to get a better system in this damn handbag ; it ’s like the fucking Bermuda Triangle in [here]_{385-new york} . “ Well , that ’s too long , ”_{[2154-an idiot]} [he]_{2154-an idiot} stammers . “ [I]_{2154-an idiot} have n’t seen [you]_3430-you for a month . [I]_{2154-an idiot} need more time with [you]_3430-you . ”_{[2154-an idiot]} “ Take it or leave it , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i reply . “ [Em]_3433-em ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i turn and kiss [him]_{2154-an idiot} softly on the lips , and [he]_{2154-an idiot} snaps [his]_{2154-an idiot} arms around [me]_2959-i . [We]_2178-we stay still for a few minutes in [each other]_{2339-each other} ’s arms , holding on tight and needing the closeness that the other provides . [I]_2959-i ’ve missed [him]_{2154-an idiot} desperately , and it would be so easy to take [him]_{2154-an idiot} [upstairs]_{2392-upstairs} right now . No . . . [I]_2959-i have serious trust issues that [I]_2959-i need to deal with . [He]_{2154-an idiot} needs to deal with . “ [I]_{2154-an idiot} ’ll sleep on [the lounge]_{252-the lounge} , ”_{[2154-an idiot]} [he]_{2154-an idiot} whispers . “ [I]_{2154-an idiot} ca n’t be away from [you]_{2154-an idiot} for one more night . Do n’t ask that of [me]_{2154-an idiot} . ”_{[2154-an idiot]} [I]_2959-i pull away , knowing where this is going if [I]_2959-i stay in [his]_{2154-an idiot} arms . “ Good night , [Jameson]_186-jameson . ”_{[2154-an idiot]} [His]_{2154-an idiot} eyes search [mine]_2181-mine as [he]_{2154-an idiot} silently begs to come [upstairs]_{2392-upstairs} . [I]_2959-i force a smile and open [my]_2959-i door as [he]_{2154-an idiot} stands on [the pavement]_{2134-the pavement} . [I]_2959-i give [him]_{2154-an idiot} a wave and disappear into [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} as [he]_{2154-an idiot} watches on . The elevator doors close , and [I]_2959-i blow out a breath of relief . [Good girl]_57-claudia . . . stay strong . [I]_2959-i put [my]_2959-i lipstick on and smile at [my]_2959-i reflection in the mirror . [Jameson]_186-jameson called [me]_2959-i when [he]_186-jameson got [home]_2289-home last night to say good night . It feels strangely good to have [him]_186-jameson back in [my]_2959-i life . . . but for how long ? [I]_2959-i have this annoying little voice in [my]_2959-i psyche that keeps reminding [me]_2959-i what [he]_186-jameson did and how badly [he]_186-jameson treated [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i ’m trying to listen to [his]_186-jameson reasoning and trust what [he]_186-jameson ’s saying , but it ’s hard to pretend that nothing has happened between [us]_2186-us . It was n’t nothing ; it was [Armageddon]_{237-armageddon} , and [my]_2959-i entire world crashed at [my]_2959-i feet . [I]_2959-i do n’t like the way [I]_2959-i depend on [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson for [my]_2959-i happiness . It wo n’t happen again ; [I]_2959-i wo n’t allow it . . . even if that means holding [him]_186-jameson at arm ’s length for the rest of [my]_2959-i life . . . or however long [we]_2187-we ’re together . See , there it is again . Negative thoughts . . . ugh . [I]_2959-i make [my]_2959-i way [downstairs]_{2454-downstairs} with [[my]_2959-i luggage]_{2189-my luggage} for the weekend with [me]_2959-i and out the front doors to see [Jameson]_186-jameson leaning up against the wall — navy suit , gorgeous face , and a swoony smile . . . just for [me]_2959-i . “ Good morning , [[my]_186-jameson beautiful girl]_2959-i . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Hi . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile up at [him]_186-jameson . [He]_186-jameson leans down and takes [my]_2959-i face in [his]_186-jameson hands and kisses [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i feel [my]_2959-i knees weaken underneath [me]_2959-i . “ How did [[my]_186-jameson girl]_2959-i sleep ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson takes [my]_2959-i hand in [his]_186-jameson and takes [my]_2959-i suitcase from [me]_2959-i . “ Fine , thanks . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Can [we]_3435-we get a civilized lift to work today ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson asks . [I]_2959-i glance over and see [Alan]_246-alan and the limo parked at [the curb across [the street]_{550-the street}]_{2190-the curb across the street} . “ Um . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ [You]_246-alan go with [Alan]_246-alan . [I]_186-jameson want to catch [the bus]_2369-there . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson raises an eyebrow as if unimpressed . “ Okay , [bus]_2369-there [it]_2369-there is . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [You]_246-alan do n’t have to walk [me]_186-jameson to work , [Jameson]_186-jameson . [I]_186-jameson ’m quite capable of getting [myself]_186-jameson [there]_2369-there . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [I]_186-jameson know ; [I]_186-jameson just want to spend the twenty minutes with [you]_246-alan . [I]_186-jameson ’m not seeing [you]_246-alan all weekend , remember ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson gives [me]_2959-i a sexy wink , and [my]_2959-i stomach does a nervous flip . [We]_2192-we walk to [the bus]_{2054-the bus} stop hand in hand . “ Have [you]_246-alan heard anything more about [Lara Aspin]_{125-lara aspin} and [Hayden]_266-jim ? ”_[2192-we] “ No . [They]_2192-we ’ve been charged , but the court case wo n’t be for a while . [I]_2959-i ca n’t believe [you]_246-alan solved it . [You]_246-alan do n’t know how grateful [I]_2959-i am to [you]_246-alan . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile , feeling proud of [myself]_2959-i . “ How do [you]_246-alan like [your]_246-alan new job ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson asks . [I]_2959-i shrug . “ It ’s great . ”_[2959-i] [His]_186-jameson eyes hold [mine]_2959-i . “ Great as in ‘ really great , ’ or great as in ‘ it will do ’ ? ”_[2959-i] “ Great as in ‘ [I]_2959-i ’m getting used to it . ’ ”_[2959-i] “ Why do n’t [you]_246-alan come back to [Miles Media]_{68-miles media} ? ”_[2959-i] “ No . [I]_2959-i ’ll be keeping [our]_2195-our work lives separate from now on . ”_[2959-i] “ Hmm . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson frowns , unimpressed . “ [We]_2195-our ’ll see . ”_{[186-jameson]} [The bus]_{2054-the bus} arrives , and [we]_2195-our make [our]_2195-our way on . It ’s crowded today , and [I]_2959-i find a seat , but [Jameson]_186-jameson has to stand . [He]_186-jameson ’s squashed between [a smelly man]_{2196-a smelly man} and [a woman who looks like [she]_{2197-a woman who looks like she has rabies} has rabies]_{2197-a woman who looks like she has rabies} . [I]_2959-i sit and watch [him]_186-jameson and the horror on [his]_186-jameson face as [he]_186-jameson watches [the people around [him]_186-jameson]_{2198-the people around him} . [I]_2959-i have to bite [my]_2959-i lip to stop [myself]_2959-i from laughing . Eventually [the bus]_{2054-the bus} pulls to [our]_2195-our stop , and [he]_186-jameson gets off in a rush . “ That ’s it , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson scoffs as [he]_186-jameson brushes [his]_186-jameson suit off like the snob that [he]_186-jameson is . “ [No more fucking buses]_{3437-no more fucking buses} . [We]_2195-our need to be disinfected right now . Did [you]_3438-you see [the people on [that fucking bus]_{2054-the bus}]_{3439-the people on that fucking bus} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i giggle . “ That was just a bad trip . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_186-jameson mean it , [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson snaps . “ [No more fucking buses]_{3437-no more fucking buses} . [Alan]_246-alan is now [[your]_246-alan driver]_246-alan . Over [my]_186-jameson dead body are [we]_2199-we catching [another bus]_{3441-another bus} . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Yes , [boss]_246-alan . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile as [he]_186-jameson takes [my]_2959-i hand in [his]_186-jameson , and [we]_2199-we begin [our]_2199-we walk to work . “ What time does [your]_246-alan flight leave tonight ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson asks . “ Three . ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson face falls . “ [You]_246-alan ’re going early ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Yes . [I]_186-jameson have a half day today . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [I]_186-jameson was going to take [you]_246-alan to [the airport]_{254-the airport} . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson frowns as [he]_186-jameson stares down at [me]_2959-i . “ [I]_186-jameson have a board meeting at four ; [I]_186-jameson ca n’t get out of it . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ That ’s fine . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Shit . . . maybe [I]_186-jameson can cancel ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [Jameson]_186-jameson , it ’s fine . [You]_246-alan are not canceling a meeting to take [me]_186-jameson to [the airport]_{254-the airport} . Stop it . [You]_246-alan will see [me]_186-jameson when [you]_246-alan see [me]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson stares at [me]_2959-i as [he]_186-jameson processes [my]_2959-i words . “ [Alan]_246-alan will collect [you]_246-alan . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i nod , knowing that if [I]_2959-i do n’t agree , [he]_186-jameson will in fact cancel [his]_186-jameson meeting . “ Okay . ”_{[186-jameson]} [We]_2200-we arrive at [my]_2959-i work , and [he]_186-jameson turns [me]_2959-i toward [him]_186-jameson . “ [You]_246-alan ’ll call [me]_186-jameson the minute [you]_246-alan land ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ No . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Why not ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [I]_186-jameson ’ll call [you]_246-alan before [I]_186-jameson go to bed . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson stares at [me]_2959-i . “ What are [you]_246-alan doing this weekend ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ [[My]_2959-i brothers]_{2616-my brothers} are all going to [Vegas]_27-vegas tonight . ”_[2959-i] “ Are [you]_246-alan ? ”_[2959-i] “ No . ”_[2959-i] “ Why not ? ”_[2959-i] “ [They]_{2616-my brothers} ’re chasing booze and [wild women]_{3444-wild women} . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i face falls . [He]_186-jameson wraps [his]_186-jameson arms around [me]_2959-i . “ [I]_186-jameson already have [[my]_186-jameson wild woman]_{3445-my wild woman} ; [I]_186-jameson ’m not interested in what [they]_{2616-my brothers} are looking for . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i smile up at [him]_186-jameson , surprisingly grateful that [he]_186-jameson ’s not going . “ Will [you]_246-alan miss [me]_186-jameson ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson whispers . “ Probably not . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [You]_246-alan probably could try and be flirtier in [our]_2201-our conversations , [you]_246-alan know ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Could [I]_2201-our ? ”_[2201-our] [Our]_2201-our lips touch , and [he]_186-jameson kisses [me]_2959-i softly . “ Are [you]_246-alan sure [you]_246-alan have to go ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson murmurs against [my]_2959-i lips . “ Yes , [Jameson]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [I]_186-jameson love [you]_246-alan , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson whispers . [My]_2959-i heart somersaults in [my]_2959-i chest at hearing those precious words . “ Have a nice day . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ That ’s not what [I]_186-jameson wanted to hear . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ But that ’s all [you]_246-alan ’re getting . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i kiss [him]_186-jameson quickly and pull out of [his]_186-jameson arms . “ Please stop pressuring [me]_186-jameson . [I]_186-jameson ’ll call [you]_246-alan tonight . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson puts [his]_186-jameson two hands into [his]_186-jameson suit pockets and smiles sexily as [he]_186-jameson watches [me]_2959-i walk into [the building]_{361-the building} . [I]_2959-i get into [the elevator]_{375-the elevator} with a hammering heart and flushed cheeks . Why is [he]_186-jameson so damn gorgeous ? [I]_2959-i walk out of work just after one o’clock and see [the limo]_{678-the limo} and [Alan]_246-alan standing beside it . [He]_246-alan smiles warmly and opens the back door as if gesturing for [me]_2959-i to get in . [I]_2959-i smile and make [my]_2959-i way over to [him]_246-alan . [I]_2959-i have n’t heard from [Jameson]_186-jameson all day and was n’t sure if [Alan]_246-alan was in fact coming to collect [me]_2959-i . “ Hello . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan smiles warmly . “ Hello , [Emily]_186-jameson . It ’s so lovely to see [you]_186-jameson . ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i get into the back of [the limo]_{678-the limo} and find a lone red rose on the back seat , waiting for [me]_2959-i . Oh . [I]_2959-i smile and inhale it deeply ; a beautiful perfume fills the space . [The car]_{369-the car} pulls out from [the curb]_{549-the curb} , and [I]_2959-i get a vision of [myself]_2959-i stomping on the yellow roses the other night . [Maniac]_238-maniac . [I]_2959-i was half hoping that [Jameson]_186-jameson would be in [the car]_{369-the car} waiting for [me]_2959-i . Should [I]_2959-i even be going away right now ? Is n’t sorting this out with [him]_186-jameson more important ? No . [You]_2207-you had these plans before [he]_186-jameson decided to waltz back in . . . stick to [them]_2208-them . [I]_2959-i should call and thank [him]_186-jameson , though . [I]_2959-i dial [his]_186-jameson number . “ Hello , ”_{[186-jameson]} [his]_186-jameson sexy voice purrs down the line . [My]_2959-i stomach flutters at the sound of [his]_186-jameson voice . “ Hi , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i breathe . “ Are [you]_186-jameson with [Alan]_246-alan ? ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_186-jameson am . Thank [you]_186-jameson for [my]_186-jameson rose . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ So red is better ? ”_[2959-i] “ Seems that way . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i feel [my]_2959-i face blush in embarrassment . “ Mental note to never buy anything yellow ever again . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i giggle , embarrassed . “ [You]_186-jameson have a good weekend , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson eventually replies . “ [You]_186-jameson too . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [I]_2959-i ’m not going to call [you]_186-jameson this weekend . ”_[2959-i] “ Why not ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ [Your]_186-jameson words are playing on [my]_2959-i mind . ”_[2959-i] “ What words ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [You]_186-jameson told [me]_2959-i not to force this between [us]_3446-us . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i listen . “ [I]_2959-i ’m stepping back . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i heart drops . “ [You]_186-jameson ’re giving up ? ”_[2959-i] “ No . Just the opposite ; [I]_2959-i ’m making plans for [our]_3446-us future . But [I]_2959-i understand that [you]_186-jameson need time . [Me]_2959-i forcing [you]_186-jameson to forgive [me]_2959-i before [you]_186-jameson ’re ready may not be the smartest move . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile softly as [I]_2959-i listen , hope blooming in [my]_2959-i chest . “ [You]_186-jameson just call [me]_2959-i whenever [you]_186-jameson want to speak to [me]_2959-i , ”_[2959-i] [he]_2959-i says . “ Okay . ”_[2959-i] “ And that could be fifty times a day . [I]_2959-i ’ll be waiting for [your]_186-jameson call like [a lovesick schoolboy]_{3447-a lovesick schoolboy} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile as [I]_2959-i hang on the line . . . [I]_2959-i really do want to see [him]_2959-i this weekend . No . “ Okay . ”_[2959-i] “ Goodbye , [Emily]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] “ Goodbye , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [I]_2959-i hang up , smell [my]_2959-i rose , and smile sadly out the window as [New York]_{385-new york} flies by . [I]_2959-i feel like [I]_2959-i ’m in a subspace . Caught between [two men]_{2115-two men} , each with [their]_{2115-two men} own memory — one of [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson ’s coldhearted dismissal and [the other of playful Jim]_{2210-the other of playful jim} ’s overwhelming love . Each time [I]_2959-i feel [myself]_2959-i leaning toward one , the other jumps in [my]_2959-i way . [I]_2959-i ’m not sure how to turn this off , but [I]_2959-i need to work it out . . . and sooner rather than later . Half an hour later [the limo]_{678-the limo} pulls up at [the airport]_{254-the airport} , and [Alan]_246-alan opens [my]_2959-i door . [I]_2959-i clutch [my]_2959-i rose in [my]_2959-i hand , knowing that [I]_2959-i ca n’t take it in . [Alan]_246-alan retrieves [my]_2959-i bag from the trunk . “ Would [you]_246-alan like [me]_246-alan to carry this in for [you]_246-alan ? ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan asks . “ No , thank [you]_246-alan . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i look down at [my]_2959-i rose . [I]_2959-i feel strangely attached to it and ca n’t stand the thought of it dying . “ Would [you]_246-alan be able to put the rose in some water for [me]_246-alan , please ? ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i ask [him]_246-alan . [He]_246-alan smiles warmly . “ Of course . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan takes it from [me]_2959-i . “ [I]_246-alan ’ll put it in water at [[Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} ’s apartment]_{3448-mr. miles ’s apartment} for [you]_246-alan . ”_[246-alan] “ Thank [you]_246-alan . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shrug , suddenly feeling stupid . “ Goodbye , [Alan]_246-alan . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_246-alan ’ll see [you]_246-alan on Sunday when [we]_3449-we pick [you]_246-alan up . ”_[246-alan] “ Okay . ”_[2959-i] With a meek wave , [I]_2959-i make [my]_2959-i way to the check - in desk , and surprisingly there ’s no line today . “ Hello . [I]_2959-i have a booking for [Emily Foster]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i slide [my]_2959-i license across the desk to the check - in clerk . “ Hello . ”_[2213-she] [She]_2213-she types [my]_2959-i name into [her]_2213-she computer . “ Ah yes , [Ms. Foster]_{126-ms. foster} . [I]_2959-i see [you]_{126-ms. foster} have amended [your]_{126-ms. foster} booking to first class . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . “ No . ”_[2213-she] [She]_2213-she rechecks the details . “ Yes , [your]_{126-ms. foster} two tickets were upgraded late last night . ”_[2213-she] “ Two tickets ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Yes , a second was booked , and then [they]_3450-they were both upgraded . ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson . “ Oh , [I]_2959-i see . Okay , thank [you]_{126-ms. foster} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i collect [my]_2959-i ticket and walk through security and make [my]_2959-i way to [the bar]_{459-the bar} . [I]_2959-i have nearly two hours before [my]_2959-i flight leaves . “ What will it be ? ”_{[2215-the bartender]} [the bartender]_{2215-the bartender} asks as [I]_2959-i take a seat . “ A margarita , please . ”_{[2215-the bartender]} [I]_2959-i text [Jameson]_186-jameson . [Mr Miles]_{79-mr. miles} , thank [you]_{79-mr. miles} for the upgrade . It is very much appreciated . Tell [me]_2959-i , was the second seat for [you]_{79-mr. miles} or to make sure [I]_2959-i did n’t sit next to [someone else]_{433-someone else} ? [My]_2959-i drink is delivered , and a text bounces back . [[My]_2959-i dear [Miss Foster]_{126-ms. foster}]_{2217-my dear miss foster} , [I]_2959-i am outraged that [you]_{2217-my dear miss foster} would think [I]_2959-i could be so calculating . Of course , [I]_2959-i do n’t want [you]_{2217-my dear miss foster} sitting next to [anyone else]_{527-anyone else} . [I]_2959-i know how irresistible [you]_{2217-my dear miss foster} are . xoxox [I]_2959-i smile as [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i drink , and another text arrives . Although , if [I]_2959-i was n’t playing hard to get and being non - pushy . [I]_2959-i would have taken [you]_{2217-my dear miss foster} on [the company jet]_{2219-the company jet} and initiated [you]_{2217-my dear miss foster} to [the real Miles High Club]_{2220-the real miles high club} . [You]_{2217-my dear miss foster} would n’t walk for a week . Enjoy the peaceful silence . xoxox [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i lips to hide [my]_2959-i smile , and [I]_2959-i text back . Goodbye [Jameson]_186-jameson . Glad that [your]_{2217-my dear miss foster} deviant behavior is still alive and well . [I]_2959-i was getting worried . xoxoxo A text comes straight in . [You]_{2217-my dear miss foster} have no idea . And no watching [Magic Mike]_60-michael , watch [Grumpy Old Men]_{239-grumpy old men} instead . It will make [me]_2959-i more appealing . xoxox [I]_2959-i sip [my]_2959-i drink and find [myself]_2959-i smiling goofily into space . Things are going well . . . for the first time in a long time , [I]_2959-i feel [myself]_2959-i become a little excited for what ’s to come . [Let]_240-let ’s see what happens . [I]_2959-i stare at the ceiling in the darkness from [my]_2959-i bed . It ’s midnight . [[My]_2959-i old bedroom]_{2221-my old bedroom} brings a surprising comfort that [I]_2959-i did n’t know [I]_2959-i needed . It ’s great being here with [[my]_2959-i family]_{2619-my family} , but [New York]_{385-new york} seems so very far away . [I]_2959-i did n’t call [Jameson]_186-jameson like [I]_2959-i said [I]_2959-i would ; in fact [I]_2959-i have n’t spoken to [him]_186-jameson all night . Being here with [people who love [me]_2959-i]_{2223-people who love me} makes [me]_2959-i realize how fragile [I]_2959-i ’ve been . [I]_2959-i was completely alone and heartbroken in [New York]_{385-new york} . [I]_2959-i mean sure , [I]_2959-i had [Molly]_198-molly and [Aaron]_0-aaron , but [I]_2959-i ’ve known [them]_{2619-my family} all of three months . It ’s not the same as having [family]_2224-family around , [the ones who will stand by [your]_2226-your side through thick and thin]_{2225-the ones who will stand by your side through thick and thin} . [I]_2959-i do n’t know where [I]_2959-i ’m going with [Jameson]_186-jameson , only that [I]_2959-i did n’t want to speak to [him]_186-jameson tonight . Why ? Maybe [I]_2959-i ’m never going to let go of this hurt ; maybe [he]_186-jameson ’s done irreversible damage . Maybe [I]_2959-i ’m too good for [him]_186-jameson and [his]_186-jameson shit . . . there ’s no maybe in that sentence — [I]_2959-i know [I]_2959-i am . [My]_2959-i phone vibrates on the side table , and [I]_2959-i frown as [I]_2959-i see the letter [J]_127-j light up . [I]_2959-i exhale heavily and answer , “ Hello . ”_[2959-i] “ Hi . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson pauses for a moment . “ [You]_186-jameson were n’t calling [me]_186-jameson tonight ? ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [I]_186-jameson got distracted . ”_{[186-jameson]} Silence down the phone . Eventually [he]_186-jameson speaks . “ [Em]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Yes . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ Did [you]_186-jameson go there to get away from [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i roll [my]_2959-i eyes in frustration . “ No , [Jameson]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper angrily . “ Why is everything about [you]_186-jameson ? [I]_2959-i booked this trip two weeks ago . ”_[2959-i] “ Okay , [I]_241-tears just asked . [Jesus]_107-jesus . Why are [you]_186-jameson so angry ? ”_[241-tears] [Tears]_241-tears form in [my]_2959-i eyes . “ [You]_186-jameson really have to ask ? ”_[241-tears] “ [You]_186-jameson tell [me]_2959-i why . ”_[2959-i] Suddenly a volcano that [I]_2959-i did n’t even know was there erupts inside of [me]_2959-i . “ Because [I]_2959-i ’m in love with [a selfish fucking asshole]_{3451-a selfish fucking asshole} , and [I]_2959-i do n’t know how to turn it off , and [I]_2959-i ’m waiting for the other shoe to drop and for [you]_186-jameson walk away again , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i blurt out in a rush . [He]_2227-he stays silent . “ And the way [you]_186-jameson just march back in and demand [my]_2227-he forgiveness pisses [me]_2227-he off . ”_[2227-he] [He]_2227-he listens . “ And [you]_186-jameson could have [any woman in [the world]_{249-the world}]_{3452-any woman in the world} ; [they]_{3452-any woman in the world} are lining up for [you]_186-jameson . So why are [you]_186-jameson putting [me]_2227-he through this shit ? [I]_2227-he do n’t want the heartache , [Jameson]_186-jameson . ”_[2227-he] “ Is that what [you]_186-jameson think ? That [I]_241-tears want [any woman in [the world]_{249-the world}]_{3452-any woman in the world} ? ”_[241-tears] [Tears]_241-tears roll down [my]_2959-i face , and [I]_2959-i swipe them away angrily . “ [I]_241-tears have no idea what [you]_186-jameson want anymore , [Jameson]_186-jameson . ”_[241-tears] “ Cut the fucking shit , [Emily]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] [he]_2959-i snaps . “ [You]_186-jameson listen , and [you]_186-jameson listen good . [I]_2959-i do n’t want [anyone else]_{527-anyone else} . [I]_2959-i ’ve been promiscuous since [I]_2959-i was eighteen years old . [I]_2959-i ’ve slept with [a lot of [women]_276-women]_{2928-a lot of women} . . . and [I]_2959-i mean [a lot of [women]_276-women]_{2928-a lot of women} . [You]_{2928-a lot of women} are the only person [I]_2959-i have ever had this connection with . [The only woman [I]_2959-i have loved like this]_{3457-the only woman i have loved like this} . So do n’t [you]_{2928-a lot of women} dare throw that shit at [me]_2959-i about wanting [someone else]_{433-someone else} . Have [I]_2959-i ever given [you]_{2928-a lot of women} any reason to doubt [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] “ [Your]_{2928-a lot of women} masseuse , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i snap . “ Was before [I]_2959-i fucking met [you]_{2928-a lot of women} , ”_[2959-i] [he]_2959-i growls . [I]_2959-i can hear the anger in [his]_2959-i voice . “ If [you]_{2928-a lot of women} do n’t want [me]_2959-i , then fine , [I]_2959-i ’ll leave . But do n’t let [me]_2959-i hold out and try desperately to make things work when [you]_{2928-a lot of women} ’re obviously not going to let [me]_2959-i in . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i face contorts with tears . “ Only [you]_{2928-a lot of women} can decide if [you]_{2928-a lot of women} want this , [Emily]_186-jameson . Forgiveness is a choice . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stay silent . “ Do [you]_{2928-a lot of women} want to walk away from [me]_2959-i , or do [you]_{2928-a lot of women} want to try and make this work ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i do n’t answer [him]_2959-i . “ Well ? ”_[2959-i] [he]_2959-i demands . “ [You]_{2928-a lot of women} know [I]_2959-i want to try , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ Then stop thinking of the bad shit , and think of the good between [us]_3459-us . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i ca n’t . ”_[2959-i] “ Why not ? ”_[2959-i] “ Because [you]_{2928-a lot of women} scare [me]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i falls silent . “ [You]_{2928-a lot of women} ’re scared of [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] “ Yes . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i nod through tears . “ [Baby]_215-baby , ”_[2959-i] [he]_2959-i whispers as empathy floods [his]_2959-i voice . “ Do n’t be scared of [me]_2959-i . Please , do n’t ever be scared of [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i love [you]_{2928-a lot of women} . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i ’m trying . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sob . “ But [I]_2959-i ca n’t help it . ”_[2959-i] [We]_2228-we both stay silent for a while , lost in [our]_2228-we own thoughts . “ [I]_2959-i want [you]_{2928-a lot of women} to take this weekend to think about [us]_2228-we . [I]_2959-i was serious about what [I]_2959-i said — if [you]_{2928-a lot of women} do n’t want to live in [New York]_{385-new york} , [we]_2228-we can move . [I]_2959-i ’ll resign from [my]_2959-i position immediately . ”_[2959-i] “ [Jameson]_186-jameson , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sigh . “ Why would [you]_{2928-a lot of women} do that ? ”_[2959-i] “ Because [I]_2959-i want [you]_{2928-a lot of women} to know that [you]_{2928-a lot of women} come first to [me]_2959-i now . All of this shit — [my]_2959-i money , [[my]_2959-i apartment]_{766-my apartment} , [my]_2959-i job , [New York]_{385-new york} — it means nothing if [I]_2959-i ’m fucking miserable , [Emily]_186-jameson . And believe [me]_2959-i , [I]_2959-i am fucking miserable without [you]_186-jameson . If [you]_186-jameson want to live in a tent in [the back of bumfuck nowhere]_{3461-the back of bumfuck nowhere} , [we]_3462-we can . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i get a vision of [Jameson]_186-jameson living in [a tent]_{1616-a tent} and being eaten by mosquitos on the daily . “ [[You]_186-jameson idiot]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile softly . “ [I]_2959-i do n’t want to live in [a tent]_{1616-a tent} . [I]_2959-i love [New York]_{385-new york} . [I]_2959-i love [you]_186-jameson running [Miles Media]_{14-miles media} . [I]_2959-i would n’t change anything about [you]_186-jameson . Why would [you]_186-jameson think that [I]_2959-i would ? ”_[2959-i] “ Because [I]_2959-i ’m a lot to take on , [I]_2959-i know that . [You]_186-jameson said to [me]_2959-i once before that to love is to be brave . [I]_2959-i need [you]_186-jameson to be brave , [Emily]_186-jameson , and move forward from all this . Please think about it . Come back to [New York]_{385-new york} and back to [me]_2959-i one hundred percent , and [we]_3463-we can start working on a new life together . Holding [me]_2959-i at arm ’s distance is n’t the way to navigate this . [We]_3463-we wo n’t be able to work it out if [we]_3463-we ’re not together . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2959-i know , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ Will [you]_186-jameson think about what [you]_186-jameson really want ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stay silent . “ Please , [Em]_3464-em ? ”_[2959-i] “ Yes , okay . [I]_2959-i will . [I]_2959-i promise . ”_[2959-i] The line falls silent for a moment , and [I]_2959-i want to change the subject . “ What are [you]_186-jameson doing tomorrow ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ Shopping . ”_[2959-i] “ Shopping — [you]_186-jameson ? What are [you]_186-jameson shopping for ? ”_[2959-i] “ Well , where do [you]_186-jameson get the tents with bathrooms in [them]_3465-them ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile . “ Bumfuck nowhere . ”_[2959-i] [He]_2959-i chuckles , and it ’s a beautiful sound ; it does things to [my]_2959-i insides . It ’s been a long time since [I]_2959-i heard [him]_2959-i laugh . “ Em . . . [I]_2959-i ’m not going to speak to [you]_186-jameson again until [I]_2959-i pick [you]_186-jameson up from [the airport]_{254-the airport} on Sunday night . [I]_2959-i want [you]_186-jameson to really think about [your]_186-jameson future and who [you]_186-jameson want in it . Either [you]_186-jameson come back to [me]_2959-i with open arms , and [we]_3467-we give this a red - hot go , or [you]_186-jameson end it . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i heart drops . “ It has to be this way . If [I]_2959-i ca n’t have all of [you]_186-jameson , [I]_2959-i would rather be without [you]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i listen as [my]_2959-i mind begins to go into overdrive . . . [he]_2230-he ’s giving [me]_2959-i an ultimatum . All or nothing . [I]_2959-i honestly do n’t know if [I]_2959-i can give [him]_2230-he [my]_2959-i all . [I]_2959-i do n’t think [my]_2959-i all exists anymore . “ [I]_2230-he ’ll see [you]_2230-he then ? ”_[2230-he] [he]_2230-he asks hopefully . “ Okay . ”_[2230-he] “ [I]_2230-he love [you]_2230-he . ”_[2230-he] [He]_2230-he hangs up , and the line goes dead . [I]_2959-i roll over in the darkness and exhale heavily . What do [I]_2959-i want for [my]_2959-i future ? Do [I]_2959-i give [him]_2230-he away . . . ? Or give [him]_2230-he everything ? Or what ’s left of [my]_2959-i heart , at least . It ’s been smashed to smithereens . [I]_2959-i literally have no idea . Chapter 27 Jameson [I]_2959-i tap [my]_2959-i foot as [I]_2959-i crane [my]_2959-i neck to look at the traffic backed up in front . Shit . [I]_2959-i press the buzzer to the front of [the limo]_{678-the limo} . “ Are [we]_3468-we going to be late ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask [Alan]_246-alan . “ No , [sir]_246-alan ; [we]_3468-we ’re an hour early . Plenty of time . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_186-jameson do n’t want to miss [her]_186-jameson flight . Go the back way . ”_{[186-jameson]} “ [You]_246-alan wo n’t . Relax . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i sit back and try to control [my]_2959-i nerves . [Emily]_186-jameson has n’t contacted [me]_2959-i all weekend , and [I]_2959-i ’m pretty sure [she]_186-jameson ’s coming [home]_2289-home to end it between [us]_2233-us . [I]_2959-i ’ve run and run and run . The only time [I]_2959-i have had any semblance of peace is when [I]_2959-i ’ve pounded [the pavement around [New York]_{385-new york}]_{2234-the pavement around new york} . [I]_2959-i ca n’t accept the possibility that [I]_2959-i wo n’t be in [her]_186-jameson life , that [she]_186-jameson wo n’t be in [mine]_2959-i . . . the thought sickens [me]_2959-i . How could [I]_2959-i have been so fucking stupid ? [I]_2959-i ’ve been trying to pull a logical argument together in [my]_2959-i head as to what [I]_2959-i ’m going to say if [she]_186-jameson ends it . . . so far [I]_2959-i ’ve come up empty . [The limo]_{678-the limo} pulls up at [the airport]_{254-the airport} , and [I]_2959-i climb out in a rush . “ [You]_3469-you ’ll be [here]_{385-new york} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ask . “ No , [I]_2959-i ’ll circle . Let [me]_2959-i know when [you]_3469-you have [her]_186-jameson , and [I]_2959-i ’ll come back around . [You]_3469-you still have fifty minutes before [her]_186-jameson plane lands . ”_[2959-i] “ Yes , yes , [I]_2959-i know . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i pat down [my]_2959-i pockets as [I]_2959-i look around nervously . “ Do [I]_2959-i have everything ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ’m flustered and vague . “ Yes , [sir]_246-alan . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i drop [my]_2959-i shoulders and exhale heavily . “ Wish [me]_246-alan luck . ”_[246-alan] [Alan]_246-alan smiles broadly and , with a jovial nod , says , “ Good luck , [sir]_246-alan . ”_[246-alan] [I]_2959-i walk into [the airport]_{254-the airport} and up to the arrival gate of [[her]_2238-her plane]_{2239-her plane} . [I]_2959-i still have forty minutes . [I]_2959-i look over to [the bar]_{459-the bar} , and it calls [my]_2959-i name in a sweet song . A scotch would be so good right now . . . take the edge off . No . [I]_2959-i need to cut that shit out . [I]_2959-i have n’t allowed [myself]_2959-i to have a drink all weekend . [Emily]_186-jameson deserves more than a drunk . With nerves racing through [my]_2959-i body , [I]_2959-i walk to one end of [the airport]_{254-the airport} and then back to [the arrival lounge]_{2241-the arrival lounge} . [I]_2959-i glance at [my]_2959-i watch . Thirty - five minutes to go . [I]_2959-i do it again and again . [I]_2959-i ca n’t sit still . Not when [I]_2959-i know what ’s coming . [Emily]_186-jameson [I]_2959-i walk with [the crowd]_{265-the crowd} into [the arrivals lounge]_{2241-the arrival lounge} . [My]_2959-i flight has just landed , and [my]_2959-i heart is beating hard in [my]_2959-i chest . [I]_2959-i ’ve dug into the bottom of [my]_2959-i soul this weekend , searching for the answers . Trying to work out what to do with [my]_2959-i life and who to do it with . One thing is clear : the only thing that is clear . . . is who [I]_2959-i love . [I]_2959-i ca n’t deny it . [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson is etched into [my]_2959-i heart , and as petrified as [I]_2959-i am of [him]_186-jameson hurting [me]_2959-i again , [his]_186-jameson words keep coming back to [me]_2959-i . “ To love is to be brave . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i ’m going to swallow [my]_2959-i pride and be brave . [I]_2959-i ’m going to let [myself]_2959-i go . . . and hope to [God]_0-aaron [I]_2959-i ’m doing the right thing , because [I]_2959-i ca n’t go through this again . [He]_186-jameson comes into view , and [he]_186-jameson smiles as [our]_2243-we eyes lock . Excitement fills [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i do a little skip and begin to run , and [I]_2959-i jump into [his]_186-jameson waiting arms . [We]_2243-we cling to each other tightly , locked in an embrace . [We]_2243-we do n’t speak ; [we]_2243-we do n’t kiss ; [we]_2243-we just hold on . Clinging desperately to the hope that [we]_2243-we can get past this . [My]_2959-i shadows are chased away for a little while . “ [I]_186-jameson missed [you]_186-jameson , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson whispers into [my]_2959-i hair . “ [I]_186-jameson missed [you]_186-jameson too . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson bends , and [his]_186-jameson lips take [mine]_2959-i as [we]_2243-we forget where [we]_2243-we are . [His]_186-jameson tongue slowly strokes through [my]_2959-i open lips , and [he]_186-jameson holds [my]_2959-i face in [his]_186-jameson two hands as [we]_2243-we get lost in the moment . [His]_186-jameson kiss is tender and , more importantly , familiar . With [him]_186-jameson , [I]_2959-i am [home]_2289-home . An hour later , [we]_2243-we walk into [[my]_2959-i apartment]_{766-my apartment} , hand in hand . [We]_2243-we hardly spoke on the way [home]_2289-home . [I]_2959-i sat on [his]_186-jameson lap , tucked safely in [his]_186-jameson big arms , and enjoyed the closeness . [His]_186-jameson lips dusted back and forth over [my]_2959-i temple as [he]_186-jameson held tight , as if not believing [I]_2959-i was here with [him]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i ’ve missed the closeness . [Our]_2243-we closeness . It ’s not even about the sex with [us]_2243-we anymore . [I]_2959-i mean , it was in the beginning . But [my]_2959-i heart has eclipsed any physical need that [my]_2959-i mere body desires . . . and [I]_2959-i know [he]_186-jameson ’s the same . [He]_186-jameson turns [me]_2959-i toward [him]_186-jameson , and [his]_186-jameson eyes search [mine]_2959-i . “ [Em]_186-jameson . . . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson pauses as if trying to get the wording right in [his]_186-jameson head . “ [I]_186-jameson swear to [you]_186-jameson , from this moment on . . . [you]_186-jameson are [my]_186-jameson everything . [Our]_2246-we new life together . . . starts right now . ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i smile up at [him]_186-jameson as [my]_2959-i eyes fill with tears anew . “ [I]_2959-i love [you]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] “ [I]_2246-we love [you]_186-jameson too . ”_[2246-we] [We]_2246-we kiss , and unlike the tenderness [we]_2246-we have shared over the last hour , a new desperation fills [us]_2246-we . Suddenly [I]_2959-i want [him]_186-jameson . . . all of [him]_186-jameson . “ Take [me]_186-jameson to bed . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson scoops [me]_2959-i up and carries [me]_2959-i into [the room]_{514-the room} like [a bride]_{2248-a bride} and stands [me]_2959-i before [him]_186-jameson . [His]_186-jameson lips drop to [my]_2959-i neck , and [I]_2959-i smile at the ceiling as goose bumps scatter over [my]_2959-i skin . [He]_186-jameson bites [me]_2959-i with an edge [I]_2959-i remember so well . Oh , [I]_2959-i ’ve missed [him]_186-jameson . [I]_2959-i lift [his]_186-jameson shirt over [his]_186-jameson head and throw it to the side , and [he]_186-jameson does the same to [mine]_2959-i . [We]_2249-we become animals as [we]_2249-we tear each other ’s clothes away . There is nothing between [us]_2249-we now . Only skin . . . and love . [His]_186-jameson lips tenderly take [mine]_2959-i as [he]_186-jameson lays [me]_2959-i back on the bed , and [his]_186-jameson lips go to [my]_2959-i neck and then start to go lower , and [I]_2959-i cling to [him]_186-jameson . “ No , [I]_2959-i need [you]_2959-i up here with [me]_2959-i . ”_[2959-i] [We]_2249-we stare at each other in some kind of otherworldly experience . This is special . [I]_2959-i wish [I]_2959-i could bottle this moment . “ Now , [Jim]_266-jim , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper , “ [I]_186-jameson need [you]_2959-i now . ”_{[186-jameson]} [His]_186-jameson eyes close in pleasure as [he]_186-jameson lies on top of [me]_2959-i ; [our]_2249-we lips are locked , [my]_2959-i legs open and cradling [his]_186-jameson large body as it rocks against [mine]_2959-i , searching for its own release . With one deep purposeful thrust , [he]_186-jameson slides [home]_2289-home deep , and [we]_2249-we both moan in pleasure . “ Fuck , [Em]_186-jameson , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson whispers into [my]_2959-i neck . [I]_2959-i cling to [him]_186-jameson as [I]_2959-i ride the pleasure wave between [us]_2249-we . “ [I]_2959-i know , [baby]_336-yay , [I]_2959-i know . ”_[2959-i] [He]_186-jameson pulls out and pushes back in , [my]_2959-i body rising to meet [his]_186-jameson . The need for more overwhelms [us]_2249-we , and [I]_2959-i begin to thrash beneath [him]_186-jameson . “ Fuck [me]_2959-i , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whimper . “ God , give it to [me]_186-jameson hard . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson pulls out and slams back in , knocking the air from [my]_2959-i lungs . [He]_186-jameson repositions [my]_2959-i legs over [his]_186-jameson shoulders and , with dark eyes watching [me]_2959-i struggle to take [him]_186-jameson , begins to ride [me]_2959-i . Long , sharp , punishing hits — the bed begins to hit the wall , and [I]_2959-i can do nothing but watch the perfect male specimen in all [his]_186-jameson glory . [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson is the most sexual being [I]_2959-i have ever known . Everything about [him]_186-jameson screams “ fuck [me]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]} Watching [him]_186-jameson in the throes of passion , where [he]_186-jameson is grappling for control , is [every woman]_{2251-every woman} ’s ultimate fantasy ; [he]_186-jameson ’s like a sexual time bomb waiting to explode . Perspiration dusts [his]_186-jameson skin ; [his]_186-jameson dark hair hangs over [his]_186-jameson forehead , and [his]_186-jameson breath begins to quiver as [he]_186-jameson struggles to hold off [his]_186-jameson orgasm . [His]_186-jameson pumps become piston fast , and the burn of [his]_186-jameson possession overtakes [me]_2959-i as [I]_2959-i fall into the abyss . [I]_2959-i cry out as an earth - shattering orgasm rips [me]_2959-i to shreds . [My]_2959-i body contracts hard around [his]_186-jameson . “ Fuck , fuck , fuck , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson pushes out as [he]_186-jameson slams repeatedly into [me]_2959-i . The sound of the bed hitting the wall with force echoes through [the apartment]_{2627-the apartment} . [He]_186-jameson tips [his]_186-jameson head back , holds [himself]_186-jameson deep , and moans loud as [he]_186-jameson comes hard , deep inside of [me]_2959-i . And then [we]_2253-we kiss , and [my]_2959-i whole world returns to good . To the place [I]_2959-i ’ve missed so , so much . The emotion between [us]_2253-we is so strong that it brings tears to [my]_2959-i eyes . “ Welcome [home]_2289-home , fuck bunny , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson whispers against [my]_2959-i lips . “ Welcome [home]_2289-home . ”_{[186-jameson]} One week later “ [We]_2253-we need to do a follow - up story , a where - are - [they]_2253-we - now kind of thing , ”_[200-athena] [Athena]_200-athena says as [we]_2253-we stand together at the printer . “ Yes , [I]_200-athena know . [I]_200-athena ’m going to go over the notes this afternoon as soon as [I]_200-athena get a chance . ”_[200-athena] [The office]_{385-new york} is a hive of activity today ; news has broken overnight . [A married senator]_{2255-a married senator} has been caught in a scandal with [[his]_{2255-a married senator} secretary]_{2255-a married senator} , and the phones are ringing off the hook . [People]_248-people are everywhere as [they]_248-people try to decipher the truth as [the rumor mill]_{2257-the rumor mill} spins into overdrive . [I]_2959-i ’m having trouble concentrating , if [I]_2959-i ’m honest . [I]_2959-i ’m on a Jameson high . [I]_2959-i think [I]_2959-i can successfully say [I]_2959-i ’ve joined [the Miles - High club]_{2346-the miles - high club} . This last week has been . . . magical . [I]_2959-i ’m completely and utterly in love with [this man]_56-robbie . [We]_2253-we moved [me]_2959-i into [[his]_56-robbie apartment]_{385-new york} on the weekend . Any trepidation that [I]_2959-i had has finally gone . [I]_2959-i hear an unusual sound coming through [the office]_{385-new york} , and [Athena]_200-athena and [I]_2959-i look up as [the office]_{385-new york} watches on . [I]_2959-i hear “ The Piña Colada Song , ”_[2959-i] and [I]_2959-i frown as [Jameson]_186-jameson comes into view through the desks . [Tristan]_2430-tristan is with [him]_2430-tristan and holding an old - fashioned tape deck , and the familiar tune is blasting through [the office]_{385-new york} . If [you]_2261-you like piña coladas , And getting caught in the rain . “ What in [the world]_{249-the world} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown . [Jameson]_186-jameson smiles hopefully as [he]_186-jameson approaches [me]_2959-i . [His]_186-jameson eyes search [mine]_2959-i . [The office]_{385-new york} falls silent as [they]_2262-they watch on . “ [Emily Foster]_186-jameson , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson says . “ Yes ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson drops to [his]_186-jameson knee , and [the office]_{385-new york} collectively gasps . [My]_2959-i hands fly over [my]_2959-i mouth . “ Will [you]_186-jameson marry [me]_186-jameson ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson opens a black box and holds out a solitaire diamond ring . [I]_2959-i stare at [him]_186-jameson for a moment as [my]_2959-i brain misfires . Is this real ? [I]_2959-i look over to [Tristan]_2430-tristan . [I]_2959-i ’m in complete and utter shock . “ [I]_2430-tristan ’m [the DJ]_2430-tristan . ”_{[2430-tristan]} [Tristan]_2430-tristan grins as [he]_186-jameson taps the tape recorder as if very proud of [himself]_186-jameson . “ [You]_186-jameson are crazy , ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . “ This proves it , ”_{[186-jameson]} [Jameson]_186-jameson mutters dryly as [he]_186-jameson looks up at [me]_2959-i from [his]_186-jameson knee . [My]_2959-i eyes are wide . [I]_2959-i ’m shocked to [my]_2959-i very core . “ Answer the question , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson says . [I]_2959-i nod through giggles as “ The Pina Colada Song ”_[2959-i] echoes through [the office]_{385-new york} . “ Yes . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson slides the ring on [my]_2959-i finger . It ’s an oval diamond on a thin gold band , and [I]_2959-i stare at it , still completely in shock . [I]_2959-i bend to [him]_186-jameson , and [we]_2264-we kiss as [the office]_{385-new york} breaks into laughter and cheers . [They]_2264-we clap as [we]_2264-we laugh into [our]_2264-we kiss . [I]_2959-i ca n’t believe this is happening . [He]_186-jameson stands and takes [me]_2959-i into [his]_186-jameson arms . “ [Cheesy]_242-cheesy enough for [you]_242-cheesy ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson smiles down at [me]_2959-i . [I]_2959-i giggle as [I]_2959-i hold [him]_186-jameson tight . “ Next level cheese — and perfect . [I]_2959-i love [you]_242-cheesy , [Mr. Miles]_{79-mr. miles} . ”_[2959-i] The song finishes , and [Tristan]_2430-tristan presses play , and the song begins to repeat . [The workers]_{2657-the workers} all cheer . [Jameson]_186-jameson laughs in embarrassment and leans in to kiss [me]_2959-i . “ The things [I]_186-jameson would do for [you]_242-cheesy , [Emily Foster]_186-jameson , the things [I]_186-jameson would do . ”_{[186-jameson]} Epilogue One month later [I]_2959-i read the story in the paper . [Hayden Morris]_266-jim and [Lara Aspin]_{125-lara aspin} were officially charged today with the embezzlement of seven million dollars from [Miles Media]_{14-miles media} . In what has been described as [a modern Bonnie]_{2266-a modern bonnie} and Clyde story , [the two , who have been dating for five years]_{2267-the two , who have been dating for five years} , carried out the fraud over a period of three years . The crime may have gone unnoticed , and [they]_{2267-the two , who have been dating for five years} were only caught when [Morris]_266-jim was fired by [Miles Media]_{14-miles media} . Fueled by a need for revenge , [they]_{2267-the two , who have been dating for five years} stupidly decided to frame [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson for the crime . In the backfire of all backfires , this decision sealed [their]_{2267-the two , who have been dating for five years} fate . [The pair]_{2267-the two , who have been dating for five years} will be serving prison time of ten years in [different state prisons]_{2268-different state prisons} . [Jameson Miles]_186-jameson has been cleared of any wrongdoing . [Miles Media]_{68-miles media} reached a new height today on [the stock market]_{2269-the stock market} since April 2018 . [I]_2959-i smile broadly . It seems so long ago now that this all happened — a lifetime , if [I]_2959-i ’m honest . Thank heavens it ’s all over . [We]_2270-we have a wedding to plan . [He]_186-jameson ’s given [me]_2959-i three months . [We]_2270-we have so much to do , so many decisions . Where will [we]_2270-we get married ? [I]_2959-i have no idea . [Jameson]_186-jameson has said that [I]_2959-i have to pick the destination because as long as [I]_2959-i ’m there , [he]_186-jameson does n’t care where it is . [I]_2959-i wait on the curb in [the underground parking lot]_{2271-the underground parking lot} . It ’s Friday afternoon . “ What did [he]_246-alan say [he]_246-alan was doing ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i frown at [Alan]_246-alan . “ [I]_246-alan think [you]_246-alan will be pleasantly surprised . ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan smirks . [I]_2959-i frown as [I]_2959-i consider the possibilities . [Jameson]_186-jameson has been acting weird all week . Taking secret phone calls and being all pleased with [himself]_186-jameson . Maybe [he]_186-jameson ’s secretly booked [the wedding venue]_{2272-the wedding venue} ? [I]_2959-i hope so — helps [me]_2959-i out . [I]_2959-i hear a crunch of gears , and [I]_2959-i look up and frown . [Bessie]_205-bessie is bunny hopping toward [us]_2273-us with [Jameson]_186-jameson behind the wheel , and [Alan]_246-alan bursts out laughing . [My]_2959-i mouth falls open in shock . “ What in [the world]_{249-the world} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper . [He]_246-alan pulls up beside [me]_2959-i , and [I]_2959-i open the door . “ Going [my]_246-alan way ? ”_[246-alan] [He]_246-alan smiles with a sexy wink . [I]_2959-i laugh out loud . “ What are [you]_246-alan doing ? ”_[2959-i] “ Taking [you]_246-alan away for a few days . ”_[246-alan] “ [You]_246-alan are ? ”_[2959-i] “ [Your]_246-alan things are already in the trunk . ”_[2959-i] “ In [Bessie]_205-bessie ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i stammer . “ Yes , in [Bitchy]_206-bitchy . [I]_2959-i borrowed [her]_205-bessie from [Viagra Mike]_{49-viagra mike} . Although [I]_2959-i must tell [you]_246-alan , [I]_2959-i ’ve ordered [you]_246-alan a new Range Rover . [Bessie]_205-bessie is unbearable . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_246-alan snob . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i giggle , then turn and hug [Alan]_246-alan in excitement . [He]_246-alan laughs . “ Have a great weekend , [Ms. Foster]_{126-ms. foster} , ”_[246-alan] [he]_246-alan says as [he]_246-alan helps [me]_2959-i into [the car]_{369-the car} . [I]_2959-i lean over and grab [Jameson]_186-jameson and kiss [his]_186-jameson face . [I]_2959-i love that [he]_186-jameson borrowed [Bessie]_205-bessie for [me]_2959-i . [He]_186-jameson honks the horn . “ Goodbye , [Alan]_246-alan , ”_{[186-jameson]} [he]_186-jameson calls as [he]_186-jameson does an overexaggerated wave . [I]_2959-i laugh out loud at [his]_186-jameson un - Jameson - like behavior . “ Goodbye , [Alan]_246-alan . ”_[2959-i] [We]_2275-we bunny hop out of [the parking lot]_{1371-the parking lot} , and [he]_186-jameson takes [my]_2959-i hand in [his]_186-jameson and kisses the back of it . “ Where do [you]_246-alan want to go , [my]_186-jameson little fuck bunny ? ”_{[186-jameson]} [I]_2959-i smile over at [[my]_2959-i beautiful man]_186-jameson . “ Bumfuck nowhere . ”_[2959-i] Two hours later [Jameson]_186-jameson pulls into [the driveway of [Arndell]_211-arndell]_{369-the car} , and [I]_2959-i bounce in [my]_2959-i seat . “ [We]_2278-we are going to [[our]_2278-we house]_{3475-our house} ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i shriek in excitement . “ Yes , [I]_2959-i booked it for the weekend . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i unclip [my]_2959-i seat belt and slide over and begin to smother [his]_186-jameson face in kisses as [we]_2278-we drive up [the driveway]_{369-the car} while [he]_186-jameson chuckles at [my]_2959-i childlike behavior . [We]_2278-we arrive at [the old house]_{2279-the old house} , and [I]_2959-i bounce out of [the car]_{369-the car} before [the car]_{369-the car} even stops and run up to the front door . [I]_2959-i turn and stare out over the view of [the beautiful grounds]_{385-new york} . “ Oh , [Jameson]_186-jameson , [I]_2959-i just love [this place]_{385-new york} . ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i smile dreamily as [he]_186-jameson walks up behind [me]_2959-i . “ [I]_186-jameson know . ”_{[186-jameson]} [He]_186-jameson hands [me]_2959-i a key ring with a red ribbon bow tied to it . [I]_2959-i frown as [I]_2959-i stare down at it in [my]_2959-i hand . “ That ’s why [I]_2959-i bought it for [you]_186-jameson . ”_[2959-i] [My]_2959-i eyes meet [his]_186-jameson . “ What ? ”_[2959-i] “ Uh - huh . [I]_2959-i thought [we]_3476-we could live [here]_{385-new york} on the weekends and on holidays . ”_[2959-i] “ [You]_186-jameson want to be [a swamp person]_{3477-a swamp person} with [me]_2959-i ? ”_[2959-i] [I]_2959-i whisper in surprise . [He]_186-jameson stands and takes [me]_2959-i in [his]_186-jameson arms . “ [I]_186-jameson could be anything , [Emily Foster]_186-jameson . . . as long as [I]_186-jameson ’m with [you]_186-jameson . ”_{[186-jameson]}